Chapter 2
Wes was awakened the following morning by the sound of footsteps and chatter from the diner overhead. He sat up, stretched, and was slowly gathering his bearings when a familiar smell wafted to his nose...
Bacon.
He groaned. "Aw, hell—"
"ESPI!"
Whelp, so much for that being the last plate of bacon Neo and Novo got. :V
He was pushed flat on his back as his Espeon leaped at him, eyes wide, tail wagging in excitement. "Espi! Epsi, espi, espi, espi, espi!"
"No, Neo." Wes shoved the Pokémon off of him with a grumble. "I gave you and Novo plenty of bacon last night. One-time deal, remember?"
Neo: “*
Come on, Wes. It’s
right there just above us. You know
you want it too…*”
At the sound of his name and "bacon" being used in the same sentence, the Umbreon lifted his head and yawned. "Umbri?" He pricked his ears forward and gave his trainer a hopeful look.
Novo: “*I heard there was bacon?*”
Wes: “... Dammit, just how sensitive are your ears?” >.<
Novo: “*We’re modeled after cats in this story. You do the math, Wes.*”
"I said no, guys." He donned a teal trench coat that fell past his knees and began to pack up his belongings, pausing only to give them a stern look. "Last night was a special treat, but today we have to get on the road as quickly as possible, which means nothing fancy for breakfast. And that's final."
Naturally, not ten minutes later, he found himself sitting across from his Pokémon in the diner, watching them each chow down a fresh plate of bacon.
Yeah, I thought so.
Kinda wonder if it’d have been funnier with a hard scene cut as like a Giligan Cut moment.
Despite all his griping, he did relish the opportunity to spoil his partners. Bacon—or any decent food, for that matter—was hard to come by, and therefore was practically a delicacy. Under normal circumstances, he would have had to resort to swiping table scraps for all three of them, but thanks to the cash he'd snatched from the hideout, he could afford to dote on his Pokémon just a little. After yesterday, he figured they deserved it anyway.
Filing
that one away for the future, though given that Orre canonically has nil for wild Pokémon populations… yeah, I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if it had nil for most other forms of wild flora and fauna, which kinda crimps food availability a bit.
The diner was just as shabby on the inside as it was outside. Still, there was a home[Bl[/B]y feel about the place, peeling wallpaper and rusty metal windows notwithstanding. The smells of various breakfast foods drifted through the air while the signature Western music played quietly in the background. On the wall across from where they sat was a flatscreen TV, arguably the most modern thing about the place. It was showing some old, obscure cartoon that nobody seemed to be watching.
I fired up the Bulbapedia page for Outskirt Stand and… huh, they really
do have a shockingly swanky TV in that rust bucket canonically. Wonder who the proprietor had to kill to get
that one.
Through the grimy window next to their booth, Wes could see two men laughing and talking amongst themselves, seemingly rejuvenated after a hearty meal. They continued laughing as they entered their vehicle—an old hover truck of some sort. Neo paused from his feast to watch them intently, his ears pricked forward, eyes trained on a large burlap sack that rested in the truck bed. His gaze remained steadfastly fixed on them, and he only returned his attention to his plate after they drove away and out of sight.
Ohai, Rui. Or at least I’m
pretty sure that that’s Rui from what I remember of Colosseum.
Neo: “*Hey, Novo. Is it just me or do you hear muffled screaming right now?*”
Novo: “*Less talk, more bacon. Probably just a desert wind blowing over holes in the roof anyways.*”
Wes, meanwhile, had turned his attention elsewhere. He ate his breakfast quietly while discreetly scanning the occupants of the place. It was relatively empty, with only a middle-aged woman seated up front, dozing quietly in her booth, and a gruff-looking man stretched out at his own booth in the back, face obscured by his cowboy hat. The diner owner could be heard whistling from the kitchen behind the counter at the very front of the train car. No signs of immediate danger, it seemed. Still, he was anxious for them to be on their way.
This part is a bit ambiguous between Wes and the diner owner. You probably want to find some way of phrasing this to more explicitly point at Wes even if you don’t outright namedrop him.
"Here's the plan," he muttered quietly to his Pokémon. They both looked up at him from empty plates, licking the last remnants of bacon grease from their muzzles. "We'll head to Phenac to stock up on supplies, and head straight to Gateon from there. It'll take us a handful of days, but if we only stop for occasional breaks, we should make it in good time. And then, if all goes well, I can get a passport there and we'll be out of Orre. For good."
Oh yeah,
that’s totally healthy for the cats there.
Neo: “*... And where are we supposed to go after this again?*”
Novo: “*I vote the regions south of here. Shouldn’t be
too hard since I’m pretty sure the language they speak there show up in a decent chunk of the media here. All we need to do is pick names that fit the neighborhood… like Wes would probably make a decent ‘Carlo’-*”
Wes: “Novo, you’re not allowed to make new suggestions for a while. (Seriously, lighten up on the localization jokes.)” >_>;
Those last two words felt like a breath of fresh air to him. They were so close now, he could almost taste it. Soon, very soon, they would be rid of this disease-ridden, Arceus-forsaken desert, and they would be free.
Okay, granted, I’m spoiled on where the underlined is going, but
that’s definitely something different from most depictions of Orre in this fandom.
Novo: “*... ‘Disease-ridden’? Where’s that coming from again?*”
Neo: “*I mean, we
are in an Arizona stand-in. Bubonic plague is just chilling around in the wildlife.*” ^^;
Novo: “*Neo, there
is no meaningful wildlife here!*” >.<
Neo: “*Well, yeah. The disease-ridden part probably ‘helped’ on that front.
Especially if it’s that ‘Night Death’ or whatever they call it that was dropping humans by the truckload in the past.*”
Neo chirped softly in agreement while his brother nodded, looking resolute. Wes couldn't help but smile softly and give them each a rub behind the ear. He'd never been much for people, but his partners more than made up for that. As far as he was concerned, there was no need for human company when his Pokémon were far and away better than any humans he'd bothered with.
Wes, I think you need some better friends. Or at least better
human friends.
"We bring this breaking news to you live from Eclo Canyon—"
A female reporter's voice blared suddenly from the TV and interrupted his thoughts. He turned his head and felt his chest freeze: raw footage was being displayed on the screen, footage of a familiar metal building, now reduced to shambles and a pile of smoking debris. The diner owner poked his head from the kitchen and, upon seeing the report, grabbed a remote from the counter and cranked up the volume. The woman up front snorted awake at the noise, and soon everyone present was watching intently.
Wes:
Novo: “*... I wouldn’t be so sure about that, Wes. What if someone caught you on camera back there.*” .-.
"Reports of an explosion yesterday have led investigators and authorities to this building, which has now officially been confirmed as the home base for Team Snagem. The scene was already abandoned by the time authorities arrived, and no casualties have been confirmed. The cause of the explosion remains unknown.
"Team Snagem is infamous for its involvement in theft, property destruction, and Pokémon trafficking. Authorities have been unsuccessful in shutting down the organization..."
Wes: “Whelp, didn’t think that I’d ever be on the same side as the
cops in life, but hey. First time for everything.”
"Hah!"
Wes gave a start as the gruff man from the back barked out a laugh. "Serves 'em right, the rotten thieves! Shoulda blown the whole lot of 'em away!" He rose to his feet and stretched.
Neo:
Wes: “(I am
so glad that we’re not in a setting where people understand Pokémon on a regular basis.)” ^^;
"Aye, I'll level with ya there." The owner nodded approvingly as he spoke, and the woman up front gave a disdainful sniff.
"I don't understand how authorities haven't at least made some progress," she said. "Whoever bombed that shack has done more than they have in thirty years!"
Wow, a law enforcement agency that makes
Kantoan police look competent and professional. I mean, I’m not
that shocked since it’s Orre, but still.
Wes turned back to his plate and inhaled deeply, willing his heart to stop racing so fast. He glanced uneasily at the metal sleeve that covered his left arm from his shoulder to his wrist. The existence of Snag Machines—particularly this Snag Machine—was not public knowledge, and his identity was safe for now.
Novo: “*... Wes, why are you wearing that in public anyways instead of stashing it on your bike?*” .-.
Wes: “Because it’s Orre and I’d like to not have it stolen while my back’s turned? Where
else am I supposed to keep it?” >_>;
At least, it should be...the bartender knew Wes as a regular, but not well enough to be suspicious. And, worst case scenario...Wes reached under his coat and brushed his fingers against the hilt of the knife he kept strapped to his belt. Well, "knife" was bit of a generous term for the thing—it was an old Skarmory feather that he'd strapped to a makeshift hilt. Not exactly the most conventional blade, but it had served its purpose on more than one occasion just fine.
Ah yes, nodding to Pokédex lore there where it’s explicitly mentioned that people once upon a time
did this with Skarmory feathers. Nice touch.
The feather itself had come from none other than Gonzap's own Skarmory, and as much as Wes hated that bloodthirsty bird, he felt a strange sense of satisfaction at being able to weaponize part of something that had once terrorized him.
You
probably want to give explicit mention somewhere that Gonzap is
the leader of Team Snagem, or if you’re deliberately playing things close to your chest on that front, that he’s
from Team Snagem. Since the name won’t mean anything to anyone who doesn’t know their Colosseum short of firing up Bulbapedia in a tab.
Yes...he, Neo and Novo had fought their way out of hell once, and they could fight their way out of this place if they needed to. Although, there was no need to resort to violence if it could be avoided. All he needed to do was get moving as quickly as possible—
"Howdy, stranger!" A hand clapped on his shoulder, and he found himself jumping again. Inwardly cursing, he turned his head to see the man from the back now standing beside him, grinning down at him. "Those are some mighty fine Pokémon ya got there!"
Whelp, so much for
that brilliant plan.
Wes shrugged off the man's hand and eyed him darkly. "Can I help you?" He growled.
The man chuckled and removed his hat, revealing a surprisingly young-looking face and a head of pink hair—pink hair? He offered a hand to the younger trainer. "Name's Willie. Yours?"
He did not shake his hand. "Wes," he answered curtly.
Neo + Novo:
Wes: “Look, what was I supposed to say there?” >_>;
Novo: “*To give an
alias like ‘Seth’ or ‘Thomas’ since we’re trying to
leave this region?*” >.<
Neo: “*Or ‘Leo’, or ‘Carlo’, or ‘Sandro’...*”
Wes: “(Oi! I thought we agreed to knock it off with the localization gags!)” >:|
Novo: “*(I wasn’t making one! Mine are literally alternate canon names! Seriously, you had to have used an alias
sometime in the past back on the old job!)*” >.<
Willie withdrew his hand, though he didn't seem to take any offense from Wes' rudeness. "Mighty fine name. You come to these parts often?"
What did this man want from him? "On occasion," Wes said curtly.
Neo: “*Wes. Seriously,
stop talking to the dodgy stranger.*” >_>;
His terse responses must have given Willie a clue, as he stepped back and tipped his hat to him. "Well, pardon me for interruptin' your meal. Was a pleasure meetin' you." He then walked up to the front counter to pay for his meal, then exited the diner.
Wes let out a breath and slowly eased his hold on the knife. He hadn't even realized he'd been gripping it so tightly.
Wes: “Talk about dodging a bullet there.”
Novo: “*Would’ve been easier if you didn’t give out your
actual name to the guy.*” >_>;
Neo: “*Relax, Novo. What are the odds we’ll ever see that guy again?*”
- Cue Wes facepalming -
Wes: “Aaaaaand you jinxed us.” >.<
He finished his meal quickly, his senses now on high alert after the newscast. It wouldn't do for them to stay here any longer.
He stepped into the bright sunlight after paying for his meal, then made straight for his motorcycle with Neo and Novo trotting happily on either side. He was halfway there when a shout stopped him in his tracks.
"Hey, stranger! Care for a battle before you go?"
Wes:
Neo: “*Oh come on, it’s not the end of the world to have a battle on the way out, right?*”
Novo: “*... Also, I’m not convinced that we’re going to have much of a choice in about five seconds.*” ^^;
Wes turned his head to see Willie leaning up against the diner, a cigarette in his hand and two Zigzagoon at his feet. The sunlight made his bright pink hair even more shocking to look at, and Wes quietly snorted to himself in disbelief. Pink hair. Unbelievable. Not that he had much of a right to mock strange hair color—his own was such a light, platinum blonde, it was often mistaken for silvery white. Still, at least he could blame genetics instead of poor decisions.
Huh, so I see that you didn’t go with anime hair colors for Wes. Filing that one away for the future.
Willie eyed the metal contraption on his arm, but if the stranger thought anything of it, he said nothing. After all, eccentric fashion choices weren't unusual in Orre. The man did, however, squint his eyes a little as he observed the tattoo on Wes' face; a thin white line that went across the bridge of his nose from one cheekbone to the other.
Wes was not unused to strange looks at his face, and while stares in general made him uneasy, he'd learned to shrug it off. Still, he sighed a little at the man's scrutinizing look. Speaking of bad decisions...but no, it was better this way. Tattoo or no, he would have been stared at anyway; his choices had been either a nasty scar or this tattoo to cover it up, and he'd chosen the latter.
… Wait, is that mark on Wes
canonically the equivalent of a gang tattoo? Since from the stink-eye this Zigzagoon guy is giving him… .-.
Though I would recommend hacking that paragraph you have there into two, since it’s effectively two separate things thematically. Zigzagoon dude’s reaction to Wes, and Wes’ backstory about his appearance.
Wes looked back at the man and shook his head. "No. We have somewhere to be—"
"Aw, don't be like that! We can make it quick." Willie gestured to his Pokémon. "They could really use the training, see."
Wes: “If you don’t get out of my way in
five seconds, I swear to gods…” >_>;
Neo: “*No, no. Let’s hear the man out for a moment, Wes.*”
Novo perked up his ears, and Neo flicked his tail, eyes gleaming with excitement. Wes supposed it had been a while since they'd had a chance to battle—properly, anyway. He figured battling while on the job for Snagem hadn't really counted, considering the main goal had been thievery and not victory.
But—no. He couldn't afford to waste time, not with Snagem at his heels, and especially not after that broadcast. The clock was ticking.
"I said no," Wes said a little more forcefully. "We don't have time for a battle. Sorry."
Wow. Wes actually being rational and not giving into the cats here like he did with the bacon. Even if I’m pretty sure that his decision is going to be moot in short order.
Willie looked disappointed, but he merely shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, can't be helped, I s'pose. You in a hurry, then?"
"Yes." Wes hopped on his vehicle and turned to face the man as his Pokémon followed behind. He noticed Neo glancing back at the Zigzagoon over his shoulder and walking with a particular swagger, as if attempting to flaunt his superiority to his would-be foes.
Show-off.
Neo: “*
Come on, Wes. You know you wanna…*”
Wes: “(Neo,
no.)” >_>;
Novo remained calm and stoic as ever, faithfully watching his trainer for any commands as he settled next to his brother with a dignified air.
"Do you know the fastest route to Phenac from here?" Wes asked Willie.
Novo: “*... Did we seriously not steal a map or working GPS on our way out of blowing the Team Snagem base to kingdom come?*” .-.
Neo: “*I mean, we
might have gotten spotted by snarling thugs not long after making our way into their cashbox and had to leg it in a hurry, so… maybe?*”
"Phenac, eh? You gonna take on the Pre-Gym there? You certainly look tough enough." When Wes didn't reply, he shrugged and pointed the way. "Head that direction and you'll be there by early afternoon. It's mostly a straight shot."
Kiiiiinda wonder if this should’ve been more explicit such as pointing at some sort of landmark or explicitly mentioning some sort of cardinal direction, since it’s admittedly a little hard to visualize.
Wes nodded his thanks. He was about to start his motorcycle when a thought occurred to him, and he turned back to the other trainer. "Hey."
"Yeah?" Willie grinned at him again. Such open friendliness from a total stranger. He was far too naive for this place.
Wes, you
do realize that the alternative scenario is that this is all an act to get your guard down, right?
"You should be more careful about who you challenge to battle. Your Pokémon are easy targets, and there are still plenty of Snaggers out there." He pulled his goggles over his eyes and gripped the handlebars tightly with gloved hands. "Don't pick fights you have no chance of winning." With that, the motorcycle roared to life and he drove off, leaving a bemused trainer in his wake.
Novo: “*Wes,
why would you volunteer that?!*” >.<
Wes: “What, am I seriously not allowed to give helpful advice?”
Novo: “*Not like
that! Thank goodness we’re never going to see that guy again after this…*” >_>;
Phenac City was often referred to as "the jewel of the desert", and it was easy to see why. Laid out in a circular pattern, with the tallest buildings at the northernmost top of the circle, the city gleamed with white stone and crystalline waterfalls flowing along the streets. The desert sun reflected off the sparkling water and white structures, making it blindingly bright to look at.
To Wes, it was a literal eyesore.
I mean, would you rather that it look like IRL!Phoenix where it’s a bunch of bland, soulless corporate boxes downtown and box stores and tract homes radiating for miles in each direction past it?
Perhaps he simply wasn't used to such pristine buildings and clean streets. His life had consisted of dirt, sweat, and rust, and none of those things seemed to belong in such a perfect place as Phenac. Plus, there was an air of false grandeur about the place that repulsed him, particularly in the way its citizens liked to flaunt Pokémon as symbols of status. Snagem may have shipped stolen Pokémon around like merchandise, but in Wes' opinion, Phenac was hardly any better. He'd preferred to avoid it on his previous missions if he could help it, but today's errands made it a necessary destination.
Wow, I have negative sympathy for this place already. Congrats on priming the audience like that, since it sets the stage for this place to have some shady stuff go down.
We won't be here for long, Wes told himself as he and his partners walked to the city gate. Just head to the market, grab supplies, and get back on the road. In and out. Simple.
Preeeeeety sure you’re jinxing yourself in live-time, Wes. But you do you.
The desert winds billowed the tails of his blue trench coat behind him as he, Neo, and Novo approached the city gate. Neo swatted playfully at the swaying fabric before bounding ahead to be at the front of the group, where he usually preferred to be.
They had just stepped through the entrance and started their way to the center of town when Wes saw the Espeon stop dead in his tracks. He didn't think much of it and continued walking; random things caught Neo's attention all the time. He did stop, however, when he heard a soft, alarmed chirp behind him. "Spi!"
Wes: “Oh no,
please tell me we didn’t pass a diner serving bacon again.”
Wes glanced over his shoulder to see his Espeon standing stiffly, fur on end. He was facing away from his trainer, ears forward, eyes focused on two men in the shadows near the city wall. They were hefting a large burlap sack between them, and were muttering under their breath, glancing about warily.
Oh, so it
is Rui there.
Wes: “... Wait, is that the same burlap sack we saw back at the-?” .-.
Neo: “*Yes, that’s why I’m pointing it out, Wes.*” >_>;
"Neo?" Wes asked quietly. He approached his Pokémon and knelt beside him, Novo close behind. "What's wrong?"
"Espi." Neo looked at Wes with wide eyes, then back at the men in the shadows. "Esp!"
Neo: “*Also, I’m
pretty sure there really
is muffled screaming coming from that bag right now.*”
Wes observed the pair with narrowed eyes. He vaguely recognized the truck parked against the wall and remembered seeing it briefly at the Outskirt Stand. He gave Neo a questioning look. The Espeon continued to stare forward, body rigid, and growled softly.
Perhaps it was obvious, or maybe Wes' personal history had taught him the signs; either way, it was clear to him that these men were not up to anything wholesome, and everything about their demeanor screamed, "shady business."
Neo: “*... Novo, how are you just completely unbothered by this and not reacting right now?*”
Novo: “*Because we live in Orre and stuff like this happens every Tuesday for us?*”
He got to his feet with a sigh and turned away. "Not our business, bud. We're here to get away from those kinds of people, remember?"
I mean I was
joking about the ‘every Tuesday’ part, but yeah. I kinda figured that that’s where things were going here.
"Es-piiii!" He felt teeth tugging at the hem of his pants and saw Neo gripping the black fabric in his mouth, looking up at him with a pleading expression.
"What's the matter with you?" Wes asked irritably. Since when had his Espeon developed such a strong moral compass? "We can't stop every shady person in town. Leave that to authorities or something. Let's go."
Neo: “*Look Wes, I’m pretty sure that whoever’s in that bag is psychic or something like that. Point is, you don’t want to just leave them.*” >_>;
Wes: “... And
how do you know this again?” .-.
Neo: “*One, we’re in a Colosseum novelization. Two,
I’m Psychic, so I have a mind for these things.*”
"Bri, umbri." This time Novo chimed in, looking up at his trainer with urgency.
Neo: “*Oh, so
now you react, Novo.*”
Novo: “*I mean, I just remembered that this
is the part of the story where we’re supposed to get a partner for Wes, and with that burlap sack that just conveniently came back again after we briefly saw it at the diner…*”
Wes: “... Is it
healthy to violate the fourth wall that casually, Novo?” .-.
"Both of you, now?" Exasperated, Wes turned one last look at the suspicious men. They had set down the sack and now appeared to be quietly arguing with one another—but they weren't the ones who held his attention this time.
The burlap sack was moving.
Neo: “*Come on, Wes. You know you’re not going to live with yourself if you just leave whoever’s in there to suffer.*”
Novo: “*Also, I’m pretty sure we need whoever’s in there to advance the plot.*” ^^;
"Oh, for Arceus' sake." He ran a hand through his sandy hair and looked down at Neo and Novo. "What, they have a Pokémon or something?" Neo's tail lashed, and Novo flattened his ears against his head. He frowned at them. "Not a Pokémon? Then what...?"
Oh.
Wes: “I’m sorry,
why do I care again when I very explicitly stated that I got along better with Pokémon than humans in this region?” >_>;
He looked at the sack again. Whatever—no, whoever—was in the sack was struggling fiercely, which prompted a bark and a kick from one of the men.
Wes: “...”
Neo: “*Uh, yeah. This is why we should intervene, Wes.*”
Merciful Arceus, he thought. Kidnappers? In broad daylight? In Phenac City, no less? Even for Orre's standards, it was rather bold. He glanced back at his distressed Pokémon and sighed. They had come here for a pit stop, nothing more. They had a long road ahead, a city to get to, an unforgiving region to leave behind forever. He had absolutely no obligation to interfere in what was clearly a messy situation, especially considering they were in enough hot water as it was.
Let someone else handle it, he thought. Preferably someone who didn't have an entire gang of thugs out for their blood.
"Not our business," Wes said again, and turned away. "Let's go."
Neo + Novo:
Wes: “... You two are just going to hound me until I step in and do something, huh?” -_-;
Neo + Novo:
He only made it two steps before Neo sprang in front of him, fur bristling, giving his trainer a hard, burning stare. Novo stood cautiously at Wes' side; Wes knew the Umbreon would go along with whatever plan his trainer thought best, especially if it was the safer route. Neo, however, seemed to have his own agenda at the moment.
"Move."
"Esp."
Novo: “*For the record, you
do want the human in that sack, Wes. But… I admittedly would be open to regrouping and considering our options a bit before blindly charging into a 2v1.*” ^^;
The two glared each other down for a moment, Novo glancing between them. Wes had all but made up his mind to return Neo to his Pokéball when his brother stepped forward, cautiously moving between them, and looked intently into Wes' eyes.
That actually makes me wonder if Espeon and Umbreon in the games will railroad you like this if you try to ignore Rui and go on with your life, or if that’s something you cooked up as part of this novelization.
"Oh, for the love of—" Wes turned on his heel and made his way towards the old hover truck, swearing under his breath. "Fine." His every instinct screamed at him to walk away and to never think about those men again, and as much as he wanted to listen, he couldn't bring himself to say no to the pleading stares of his Pokémon. "This is the only time, got it? Don't make me pretend to be some hero."
Oh, so they really
are doing the Puss in Boots face right now. Though this is absolutely
not going to be the only time that you get roped into these heroics, Wes. Just like it absolutely won’t be the last time that you spike your cats’ cholesterol levels from letting them binge on bacon. :V
Neo and Novo chirped and strode eagerly at his heels.
Wes could hear their conversation as he approached. "Wha' do you mean, take a rest? We're almost there!"
"I'm tired, man. An' shouldn't we bunker down till nightfall anyhow? This lil scrap ain't making it easy for us, and I don't want to cause no scene." The second man glared down at the wriggling sack.
I mean, I know that this is what happens canonically, but
you have a sack wriggling about in an open space. This is literally the
definition of causing a scene.
"I'll cause a scene!" The first man snarled. His eyes were shielded by his own pair of sunglasses, and some blonde hair could be seen poking out from under his dark beanie. "We're gonna cash in on this haul today, an' I don't care how tired you are! I ain't keeping this extra baggage longer than I have to!"
"Pipe down, Trudly!" his partner hissed. "We can't go around shoutin' our business, someone might hear us—"
"Someone like me, for instance?"
Folly: “... Too late.” >.<
The pair whipped around to find Wes standing a few yards away, arms folded, his companions at his side. The first man, Trudly, addressed him in a low growl.
"Listen, kid, I dunno what you heard, but you best keep to your own business if you know what's good for you."
Wes raised an eyebrow. "Very scary. Consider me intimidated."
And then the pair pulled out Glocks and casually mowed Wes down-
Neo: “*Those two were literally talking about getting a payday for a kidnapping.
In public. Do you seriously expect us to believe that they’re competent enough to go around armed?*”
Novo: “*Also, it’d kinda be a bad novelization for things to end in the second chapter, so…*”
Trudly snarled and took a step forward, but his partner reached out an arm and stopped him. "Ain't nothin to see here, stranger. We're just delivery men doin' our route. Now get gone." He glared at Wes through a pair of orange goggles that matched the absurd color of his hair.
Wes: “Could you have told any
more transparent of a lie right now?”
Trudly: “Could you have taken any
less of a hint to piss off, kid?”
"Funny, I don't recall people being a common delivery item," Wes remarked. Both of the men paled. "Would your 'route' happen to include some sort of human trafficking ring?"
The sack wriggled again, and this time muffled shouts could be heard coming from inside. The second man swore vehemently and gave the bag another kick, producing a yelp from their captive. "Damn it all," he spat at Wes, "You just had to stick your nose where it don't belong! We'll make you sorry, boy!"
Wes: “You
do realize that you were doing this in a public space of the biggest city in this region, right?”
Trudly: “And
you realize that you didn’t get the hint through your thick skull to
leave.
Now you’re gonna find out what happens when you don’t
listen!”
He stepped forward and summoned his Pokémon in a flash of white light. Two Whismur hopped forward, tensed for battle. Despite their readiness to fight, it was hard to find the pink, rotund things menacing. Wes snorted. "Is that all you got?"
"You cocky little—" The trainer's lip curled, and he bellowed at his Whismur. "UPROAR!"
Oh well
that wasn’t expected… and is almost certainly going to draw a ton of public attention from how
loud that move is.
"Neo, Novo, charge up!" Wes barely had time to give the command before the opposing Pokémon launched their assault. The brothers responded immediately to the veiled phrase, having executed it hundreds of times before.
Neo's forehead jewel gleamed, and a silvery Protect shield formed around him, blocking the Whismurs' attacks completely. Novo, however, braced himself and took the hit - he tumbled backwards, then scrambled back to his feet and howled. Neo's fur bristled and his eyes gleamed as he gained strength from his brother's Helping Hand.
Huh. Clever party trick there. Though it makes sense that trainers would wind up coming up with shorthand names for certain combinations that they use frequently. Especially in contexts where they
don’t want their foes to get wise to what they’re doing.
"Neo, Confusion! Novo, Bite!"
They lunged forward. The opposing trainer bellowed commands, and both Whismur hurled themselves at the empowered Espeon. Novo intercepted a Headbutt from one, staggered briefly, then returned a fierce Bite, fangs tearing into the pink Pokémon. The Whismur's battle cries turned to shrieks as the Umbreon flung his opponent and sent it rolling through the dirt. The second Whismur failed to reach Neo before it, too, was sent flying from his Confusion attack.
Folly: “C-Come on, you two! Get it together! You can’t let some kid with a pair of cats whip you like this!” O_O;
Wes: “You have no idea who I
am, do you?”
"Switch!" Wes' voice sounded from behind.
In a synchronized motion, Neo and Novo gracefully moved across the white stones, each one targeting the others' former opponents. The Whismur struggled to their feet as their trainer called for another Uproar. The resulting attack screamed through the air, piercing their foes' ears, but it hardly mattered - the Espeon and Umbreon were already upon them. With a final Bite and Confusion, the Eeveelutions sent their foes tumbling backwards. The Whismur rolled to a stop at their trainer's feet, and this time they didn't get back up.
Folly: “...”
Wes: “So. Do you feel lucky, punk?” >:|
"HAH?!" Trudly roared in fury at his partner, who stood frozen in shock. "Was that the best you could do against some scrap off the street? You're an embarrassment!"
Wes: “... Have you seriously just been standing here this whole time armchair refereeing instead of attempting to help your partner?” -_-;
Trudly: “Yes, and? That’s what happens canonically, so what’s it to ya?”
"You're no better," replied Wes dryly. Neo and Novo trotted triumphantly back to him, and he crouched down to rub their ears. Trudly spat a colorful insult at him in response.
"What do we do, Trudly?" The orange-haired man's eyes were wide with fear as he returned his Pokémon and addressed his partner. "M-maybe we should run—"
"Shut your trap, Folly! Don't throw around my name here! We can't have everybody knowin' who we are!"
"...but you just said my name!"
Wes: “I’m starting to understand how these two were dense enough to just openly lug around a kidnapping victim in a burlap sack in the middle of the biggest city of Orre.” -_-;
Trudly blanched. "Aw, hell—"
"What in Arceus' name is going on here?" A female voice drew everyone's attention. A middle-aged woman stood a cautious distance away, watching the scene with frightened eyes. A young man in jogging gear walked up beside her, frowning.
"I'd like to know that myself!" he said.
I warned you about that Uproar, bro.
Wes stood, staring Trudly and Folly in the eyes as he responded to the people behind him. "These guys are kidnappers," he said simply. "And thought they could get away with it."
"What?" The woman cried. "Do you mean—are you sure—oh!" She gasped in horror at the sight of the still wriggling sack.
Wes: “Aaaand
that would explain why nobody bothered to stop these two earlier.”
Novo: “*I mean, when an
entire region goes ‘nope, not my problem’...*”
Folly swore loudly and grabbed Trudly by the arm, hauling him towards the hover truck. "Time to bail, man!" He glowered at Wes, who returned his gaze nonchalantly. "I'll remember you, kid!"
Wes smirked. "Aw, how cute."
Wes: “... Wait, how are you even going to
get away from here right now-?”
The men broke into a sprint and hopped into their truck. The young athlete yelled and started forward, but he only made it a few steps before the truck roared alive and hauled away, plowing recklessly to the city entrance. He turned to Wes in frustration. "We—we have to stop them!"
Wes shook his head. "They'll be long gone by the time we can give chase. No point in that."
I
kinda wonder if there should’ve been more acknowledgement of the truck as a background detail in this entire scene. Also, I’m a
little surprised that given how Neo basically took the initiative in teeing up this encounter in the first place, that he didn’t do something like unilaterally get off a Psybeam as a parting shot as the truck sped off or something like that.
Like I get that the truck is supposed to very rapidly get away from Wes and the onlookers since: A: this actually happens in Colosseum, B: trying to chase it around when he’s separated from his bike is futile, but unless the hovertruck roaring to life kicked up debris that made everyone flinch and shield their eyes or is the equivalent of loudly turning on a vacuum cleaner right next to Neo and Novo, that Wes basically just let Trudly and Folly get away here without a clear rationale. Even if it’s something as simple as “nope, don’t need to get in deeper with this”.
"Can you boys help me with this knot?" The woman had rushed to the sack and was frantically pulling at the rope tied around its mouth. The young man sprinted over to help, but Wes hesitated. He had half a mind to walk away right then and there—he'd done his duty, after all—but then decided, more out of curiosity than anything else, that he might as well stay to make sure the victim was all right.
I mean, it’s how it works if you’re looking to become a protagonist, but this is pretty much the exact
opposite of what you want to do if you don’t want to get involved in other people’s problems… not that Neo and Novo would be likely to let you go anywhere fast. ^^;
The knot was, in fact, relentlessly tight. Even with two people working at it, it refused to give way. Wes brushed them aside and called for Novo, who stepped forward and gnawed at the rope. Within seconds, the rope was severed, and the woman swooped in to open the sack.
A girl burst out of the sack, gasping great gulps of air. Most of her red hair was pulled up into two pigtails, and the rest of it was drenched in sweat and plastered to her face. In fact, she was almost entirely drenched in sweat—not surprising, as Wes couldn't imagine how hot it must have been inside the stifling burlap.
I know that it’s game canon, but I couldn’t help but get in a giggle since Rui’s been lugged around like this in a stand-in of the Sonoran Desert, and… yeah, you would have
problems after going through this sort of experience IRL at just about any time of the year.
"Oh, you poor dear!" The woman reached out and pulled the girl's blue and pink jacket from her shoulders in an attempt to cool her off. "Those monsters, how could they do this to you?"
The girl looked around, taking in her surroundings. She seemed incredibly disoriented. "Wh-where—?" She broke off in a coughing fit. The Phenac woman placed an arm around her shoulders and tutted with concern.
Wes: “... Also, I’m pretty sure that she’s exhibiting signs of heatstroke right now, but let’s
not panic her about her condition at the moment.” ^^;
"You poor, poor thing—do either of you have water?" She asked Wes and the boy beside him.
Wes shook his head, but the athlete promptly answered, "I do!" He procured a water bottle from his pack, crouched beside them, and handed it over. The girl, still gasping for air, gave him a weak smile and took it from him. She opened it with shaky hands and raised it to her lips.
Wes: “Whelp, mission accomplished. Kidnapping victim’s still alive. Time to turn around, get our stuff, and-”
Neo:
Novo:
Wes: “Oh come on, what
now, you two?” >.<
"You need to take small sips." Wes surprised himself by speaking. What did he care? Why had he bothered to stick around this long? Why hadn't he left already? "You're probably really dehydrated, so don't drink it all at once or you'll make yourself sick."
Because your cats would probably firmly veto you if you tried to leave? :V
The girl gave him a shaky nod and did as he advised, sipping carefully from the bottle. Her hands were trembling so badly that the woman beside her reached out and helped keep them steady. "To answer your question, you're in Phenac City, dear," she said kindly. "Would you mind telling us who you are? Perhaps there's someone we can call for you?"
The girl lowered the water bottle and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "My name is Rui," she said, her voice now steadying. "Rui Everlin." She looked between the woman and the boy beside her and smiled at them—a surprisingly genuine one, Wes thought, considering what she had just been through and how badly shaken she was. "Thank Celebi you were here to help me...I don't know how to repay you!"
‘Thank Celebi’, huh? So Rui’s from Agate Village? Or at least if my memory from osmosis serves me right, that’s where you run into Celebi in Colosseum.
Celebi? Wes frowned a little. He'd scarcely ever heard people swear by that name. He noticed the woman and the boy beside him exchange surprised looks, and wondered if they were thinking the same thing as him: She's not one of those crazy believers, is she?
Wow, rude.
The athlete simply shrugged. "Well, we didn't do much," he admitted as he turned back to the girl. He gestured to Wes. "He's the one who did all the work and chased those thugs off. It was real impressive, too, you should have seen it!" He gave Wes a look of shining admiration, which made him feel rather uncomfortable.
Wes: “(I’m… just going to
not tell this guy that up until about 24 hours ago, I was actively stealing Pokémon from guys like him.)” ^^;
The girl named Rui looked up at him with shockingly bright blue eyes. She beamed at him with radiant gratitude. "Thank you—thank you so much! And you are?"
Wes paused. Giving out his name to perfect strangers was not on his list of things he wanted to do today—but then again, rescuing a kidnapping victim hadn't made it on that list, either. "Wes," he said shortly. He didn't offer his full name and was grateful when she didn't ask for one.
Novo: “*Wes, you’re
doing it again...*” -_-;
Wes: “Look, Novo, we’re about to blow this region in like a day. I’m allowed to use my real name, alright?”
"I'm Dash," said the young man. He and the woman helped the girl to her feet, and Wes couldn't help but note how short she was—her head barely reached his shoulders, if that. No wonder she got kidnapped. Easy target, I suppose.
Rui: “‘Easy target’?”
Wes: “Well, are you going to prove me wrong, or…?”
"And you can call me Marla, dear," said the lady kindly. "But enough about that—we need to get you taken care of. Who can we call for you? Perhaps we can help you get back to wherever you're from? Oh, we ought to get you to a hospital!"
Yes, that would be wise after you’ve been baking in the desert heat for half a day, honestly.
"No, no, I don't need a hospital, really!" Rui said. "If—if I can get to a Pokémon Center, I can—wait!" She stopped abruptly and her eyes widened as if she'd just remembered something. She turned to Wes with an urgent expression on her face. "Those men you battled—did they have an unusual Pokémon?"
Wes: “Lady, has anyone told you that you have some seriously skewed priorities in life?”
Rui: “Look, just answer the question! It’s important!” o_o;
Wes eyed her warily. Unusual Pokémon? Perhaps the heat had disoriented her? "No." He shook his head.
Dash frowned and nodded. "They looked like ordinary Whismur to me..."
"You didn't see a Makuhita?" She looked between the three of them. Wes shook his head again. "Oh..." the girl's face fell and she looked deeply troubled.
Wes: “... Were they
supposed to have one, or…?”
"Oh, you don't have to worry about those—those—thugs any longer, dear," Marla fussed. "Let's get you taken to a Pokémon Center and—"
"No, wait!" The girl's face was urgent. "I need...I need to speak with the mayor!"
Wes: “Again.
Skewed priorities.” >_>;
"The mayor?" asked Dash. He gave her a baffled look. "Why the mayor?"
"Those men grabbed me because I saw something," said Rui. "They had a Makuhita and there was something really...really wrong with it. I need to report this to the mayor so somebody knows about it!"
Wes: “And you’re not going to the police
why?” -_-;
Rui: “Because Orrean police are jokes that make Kantoan cops look competent and professional?” >_>;
- Beat moment -
Wes: “Okay, fair point. Might be worth tracking down that mayor after all sometime when you’re not half-dead from heatstroke.” ^^;
Marla frowned at her. "I'm not sure what the mayor can do if those people have left town already..."
"They were heading here for something!" Rui said emphatically. Her eyes were wide and pleading. "I think they might come back, and I'm really worried about what they plan to do with that Pokémon!"
Mew above, she's sure passionate, thought Wes. She was awfully fired up and upset, all for a Pokémon she didn't even know. What is wrong with this girl?
I mean, she might be
slightly delirious from heatstroke right now?
Also she’s psychic and can tell if Pokémon have been shadowed, so picking up on their vibes might be hugely freaky for her.
"The Center is close to the mayor's house," offered Dash. "We can take you there after we take you to the mayor, I guess...?"
"Oh, would you? I don't know this city well, so that would be really helpful!" Rui beamed at the athlete.
Wes: “Look kid, can’t this wait sometime after you get medical attention-?” ._.;
Rui:
"But you ought to take this young man with you!" Marla gestured to Wes. "If those criminals are coming back, you ought to have someone with strong Pokémon."
Wes:
Marla: “I mean, why not? You’re clearly experienced at battling and you
did find her, so…” ^^;
[ ]
"No," Wes said shortly. "I have places to be." He'd taken far too many detours today already.
I kinda wonder if this bit would’ve had more punch if you had Wes more visibly react to Marla volunteering his help with more of a start / “dude,
no”-ness to it before he speaks up.
Marla gave him a pleading look. "Oh, but if those men come back for her...I don't have my own Pokémon, you see, or I would take her..."
Dash rubbed the back of his head. "W-well, I do have my Castform," he said. "He's not a battler, exactly, but...maybe..."
Wes: “(Seriously, what is wrong with trainers in this town and not having decent Pokémon with them-?)” >_>;
- Beat moment -
Wes: “(... Right, I
might have had something to do with that in the past. Especially if Marla’s keeping her Pokémon at home to keep them from getting stolen right now.)”
They all looked at him hopefully. Even Neo was looking up at his trainer with pleading eyes. Traitor, thought Wes sourly. Do you want to get to Gateon or not?
Neo: “*Oh come on, Wes. How long does it take to walk a girl over to the mayor’s office here?*” -_-;
Wes: “You see, I was asking myself that about making sure she was alright, and now we’re getting into talking about running errands for her out of the goodness of our hearts. I’m pretty sure this is the point where we should cut our losses and run.” >_>;
A low, harsh, eerily familiar voice rang inside Wes' head. Sticking your neck out for people is what gets you killed, it snarled. Don't be a fool, boy.
Right. He didn't have time for this.
There’s
quite a story behind that quote, I can already tell. .-.
But then he noticed Novo, practical though he was, shift uncomfortably and look up at him. Never once had his Pokémon led him astray. For all the survival instincts Wes' upbringing had drilled into him, he would always trust his Pokémon, his family, more than anything else.
Wes: “
Et tu, Novo?” >_>;
Novo: “*Look, we literally need to hang around this girl for plot reasons, and it’s faster to just go to the mayor now instead of babysitting her at a Pokécenter for an evening beforehand.*”
Wes was done in. He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a long-suffering sigh. "Fine."
Neo chirrupped happily and Marla beamed at him approvingly. "You're such a kind gentleman!"
I'm definitely not.
Wes: “I’m pretty sure that this counts as some form of coercion right now-” >.<
"Oh, thank you, thank you so much!" Rui bounded up to him, and for one terrifying second he thought she might hug him. Don't touch me. He was immensely relieved that she didn't.
Well, Wes certainly has
problems given that he’s apparently afraid of intimate contact with other humans. It’ll be interesting to see where
that one is coming from.
"That's really generous of you, man," said Dash. He looked relieved. "Maybe we can all go together—"
"No." Arceus forbid Wes get saddled with more unnecessary distractions today. He quickly thought of an excuse. "You two should go to the Town Hall and report this incident. Make sure authorities know about what happened." Not that it will do much, he thought to himself. The only "authorities" in Phenac City were the staff at the Town Hall, and they could do little more than raise awareness and alert the citizens.
Dash nodded. "Alright, good plan."
- Blinks -
Oh right, in Colosseum, you go straight to the mayor’s house to meet him. Somehow I forgot about that in spite of Dash literally mentioning the mayor’s house in passing earlier this chapter. I
kinda wonder if in-setting it ought to have made sense for Wes to have either found it strange that the mayor would be at his house during working hours, or if it’s common in-setting knowledge, some sort of “by the way” comment in the narration to remind the reader “... Right,
Es Cade likes hanging around his house, so of course that’s the most logical place to start looking”, since that’s something that won’t be immediately obvious to readers that aren’t aware that that’s how it works in Colosseum.
He and Marla said their goodbyes. Dash left his water bottle with Rui, claiming she needed it more than he did and that he had plenty more where it came from. Rui thanked him and Marla generously for their help, and the two set off in the direction of Town Hall.
Rui turned to Wes with a bright smile. "I'll let you lead the way, then!"
Wes: “Lady, I
literally just pulled into this town earlier today and made a repeated point of trying to
avoid being here earlier in my life.”
Rui: “.. Still more knowledgeable than me, so… yeah, kinda relying on your guidance here.” ^^;
Her bubbly demeanor absolutely baffled him. What kind of person could smile so easily after being kidnapped, for crying out loud? Wes shook his head slightly and sighed again—he'd been doing that an awful lot today, it seemed. "It's this way. Let's go." He didn't even wait for her to respond before setting off in the direction of the mayor's house, Neo and Novo trotting faithfully in tow.
It was already looking to be a long day.
Neo: “*Aww, you’re crushing on her…*”
Wes: “(Neo. Shut.
Up.)” >
///<
Novo: “*No, no, I think he’s onto something there, Wes.*”
Alright, and made it to the end, time for my overall thoughts:
Honestly, I can see what the hype about the story is about, since it takes the script of a lesser-known game from the franchise, and from just these first two chapters, it does a pretty good job at turning Orre into a place that feels living and breathing and makes you want to get to know more about it. Wes and the cats are by far the star of the show at this point of the story, and they have a lot of little character flourishes that give them a lot of pop, while feeling consistent with what we know Wes’ background canonically
has to involve. There’s a few hints and passing mentions of things that go beyond established canon, but nothing thus far feels like it’d be out of place for what I know of the way that Orre was depicted in the actual games.
As for critiques, I don’t have
too many beyond the ones that I explicitly outlined in my readthrough, a couple of which you’re already aware of and pending implemented fixes, and I honestly might’ve missed a few in Chapter 2 since I was too busy getting engrossed into things. The
one significant structural critique that I have is that there are a few parts of this story that feel like they wouldn’t have as much impact on a reader without knowledge of Colosseum or else feel out of place. The bit involving Wes thinking about Gonzap and his Skarmory in passing and the bit about zeroing in on the Mayor’s house for where the gang wants to go to find him are both examples of that. Granted, that might have been done deliberately on your part as an author where you’re taking advantage of your source material’s relative obscurity to surprise the audience later, but if it
wasn’t, you’ll want to make sure to be a bit more generous about tipping off the context of how things work in this region, since Orre is pretty different from mainline regions in a number of respects.
But altogether, I had a good time with this story
@HelloYellow17 . I could absolutely see myself coming back to this story in the future, and from what I’ve seen, it lives up to the hype that I’d heard of it pretty well.
Gud story, pls update.
Kudos, and hope that the feedback proves helpful to you in your writings.
