Pokémon Timeslip

[Nekodatta]

Spoiler: Author notes:

Happy almost new year! This chapter was... hard ahah. I didn't want to straight up skip the period of Arven being a toddler but on the other hand... writing really small babies is hard. Writing two new parents having a really small baby is even harder lol
There's both so many little moments that feels wrong to skip in those first couple of months and yet I had a lot of trouble in coming up with scenes featuring them.
There's probably going to be similar little time skips in the next couple chapters, so we can actually get to the part where Arven gets to be his own character, which I actually can't wait to write.

Chapter 36: Lamiaceae, part II​

The door of the laboratory suddenly opened, letting in the light of the day. Miguel let out an irritated caw and raised his head from under his wing, squinting in the bright sunlight. He had flown around the lighthouse the whole night, looking for sparkling treasure, and his human knew that he was usually sleeping at that time of the day, unless they had an important battle the next day, but that hadn't happened in a while.
In front of him was his human, Turo, who smiled bright: the Murkrow tilted his head, perplexed.
That was strange: at that hour of the morning, Turo usually spoke in grunts and single words, sipping that "coffee" he liked so much.
That was maybe why they got along so much.


« Hi Miguel. Sorry, I know you're usually sleeping right now... But this is important. I just got home from the hospital with Sada and Arven »


He was still smiling widely, and it was starting to creep Miguel out a a bit, but there were more important things. A word he didn't know.


« "Arven"? » he cawed, flapping his wings to land on Turo's shoulder as he walked out of the living room, and towards the bedroom of the two humans'new nest.
Turo raised one hand to pet his head feathers, and he crowed and affectionately pecked his earlobe.


« I want you and Ampere to meet him »


Ampere was already bopping up and down in the corridor, his companions vorticking around him. Miguel didn't really like them: he already had to accept a Pokémon with thunder as part of his flock, and now there were even more! Thankfully most of them, apart from those two, didn't look all that interested in him, simply staying around the lighthouse and not coming inside.


Turo took a moment to pet the three Magnemite in turn, and Miguel shifted on his shoulder, growing impatient.


What was this "Arven" he had to see? Was it a new team member? What Pokémon would it be? Hopefully not another thunder one... he wouldn't mind another bird, hovewer. Someone that could actually fly with him.


It was only when Turo entered the room where Sada was holding something in her arms that he realized that "Arven" was not another Pokémon but a tiny human. Well, "tiny" meant that it was still almost as big as him, but still quite small, for a human. Kim and Ötzi were already sitting near Sada, one on each side, eagerly raising their heads to try and get a peek at it.
Miguel's eyes widened, and he hopped from one of Turo's shoulders to the other, tilting his head sideways.


Human hatchlings were strange, Miguel thought as soon as he could see him; they looked completely different from adult humans. Little Murkrow looked exactly like he did as soon as they were born, only much smaller, obviously. And they were completely helpless!
The little hatchling from his human looked like it could't even do a simple Peck.
Then again, neither could his human, as an adult.


The little human was sleeping, his breath calm and steady; even as Sada was holding him thight, Miguel couldn't help but chirp a little in worry; it had no fur nor feathers, wasn't it cold? Near him, Kim grumbled in agreement, and made her fiery mane crackle a bit warmer.


« Here he is... Our little treasure. You will help look after him, will you? » Turo's hand came to scratch him under his wings, in one of his favourite spots, and Miguel closed his eyes and cawed happily.
He would. He could understand this. Hatchlings weren't sparkly, but they were still treasure.


---
It still didn't feel quite real to Turo every time he looked at Arven that this was truly his son. Everything felt surreal; until now, he and Sada had focused only on themselves, on how to adapt to their new life. But now, they had someone that was completely dependant on them; it was... both an incredibly exhilarating feeling and completely humbling.


« He... He doesn't cry much, does he? » he asked that afternoon as Arven had just fallen asleep with a big yawn after eating.


They were both currently in the bedroom, watching over him in the baby crib, and Turo couldn't help but anxiously hover over him.


« Is... Is that normal? What if it means there's something wrong...? » he asked.


Sada simply smiled and shook her head.


« He's fine, Turo. Babies cry when they need something, so it's a good sign, no? » she answered. He looked at her for a couple of moments, quietly wondering how she was feeling.


« Is this... Weird, for you? » he finally asked.


When she turned towards him with a blank expression, he hurried to add:


« I mean... It must have been so much more difficult in your time... how did you even...» he said, looking back down at Arven. He wondered what would have happened if, somehow, he had been born while Sada was still back in the Paleolithic... just the thought of all the dangers he would have to brave and be exposed to was chilling.


It took Sada a couple of moments to answer.


« Well, it is... reassuring, to be here, in a way. I don't have to worry about wild Pokémon attacks, sure... but honestly, at the moment it just makes my mind focus even more on everything else that could be going wrong.» she answered with a bit of a tired smile, sitting down on the bed. He copied her, the mattress dipping slightly under both their weight, and for a moment they both simply stared at the sleeping form of the baby inside the crib.


« Let's just take it one day at a time.» he whispered as Sada let her head drop on his shoulder with a sigh.


« Yes. One day at a time. Just like that time in Area Zero.» she answered.


« At least we're not gathering rainwater in cups to survive this time.» he mumbled, and she laughed.


---
During the late afternoon, right as Arven had woken up and Sada had picked him up in her arms, the bell rang suddenly. They shared a look, Turo raising one eyebrow as he shrugged.


« Clavell said something about wanting to visit yesterday, it's probably him?» he said, heading towards the door. Sada followed, Arven in her arms as Kim traced her every step, eyes fixed on the baby like it was her own newborn Litleo.


« Where's Sada's little precious baby?!»
Raifort's voice rang from the entrance, and Sada walked into the corridor just in time to see the woman completely ignore Turo at the door to head towards her with a radiant smile. Jacq and Turo shared a glance and a sigh, while Clavell just shook his head with a smile, his Oranguru holding a small mountain of packages floating in midair with a Psychic. Turo closed the door behind everyone and frowned slightly, following the group and Sada in the living room.


« ... It's kind of my baby too, you know.» Turo mumbled as he opened a cabinet to grab some snacks and anything they could offer to drink. Sada noticed with a bit of an amused smirk that Raifort immediately sat down beside her on the couch, stealing Turo's usual spot.


Turo immediately noticed, but just rolled his eyes and sat down on the opposite couch near Clavell. Jacq hovered near a sofa for a moment before sitting down, immediately bumping the little table in the middle with his knee and hissing in pain. Sada had never met someone even clumsier than Turo before getting to know the young scientist, and Jacq reminded her a bit adorably of the first few times she and Turo had met. He had that same air of being so focused on his interests to the point of not really being aware of his own surroundings, or even his own body.


Clavell's Oranguru carefully floated the packages down on the table and stood aside, where he was quickly approached by both hers and Turo's Pokémon. Sada took a long, deep breath, as everyone turned towards her. Or more accurately, to Arven.


This was... Really nice, and somewhat nostalgic. A little, cozy space filled with people, all because of the newborn child in her arms, blissfully unaware at being the center of so much attention.


« He's so cute... He has your eyes, Sada» Clavell commented, peering at him for a long moment.


« Actually » Jacq piped up «All babies have clear eyes at first, it's even shown in some newborn baby Pokemon, interestingly enough... » he started to sputter as everyone turned to him.
« But... Yes... Really cute! Can I hold him? »
« I want to hold him first! »


Sada had no idea if Clavell had said so as a pure coincidence or if he had noticed the way both she and Turo's eyes had widened slightly in alarm, but she carefully passed the baby in his arms with a small sigh of relief. Not that she didn't trust Jacq, but... he could be a bit...


She quietly observed Clavell as he sat down with Arven in his arms, smiling not unlike it was his own son. She realized right now that Clavell, despite being a good decade older than both her and Turo, had never married nor had children. For a brief moment, she wondered if that was why he enjoyed his work as an Academy teacher so much.


She was distracted by his Oranguru floating the first package right into her lap.


« Oh! Thank you! » she smiled at the Pokemon, then opened the little wrapped present.
« That one's from me. » Raifort whispered, and Sada's eyes widened when she opened it up.
It was a brightly coloured book titled "Paldean goodnight fables for children", filled with beautiful illustrations of traditional children stories.
« It's beautiful... He's going to love it, I'm sure.» she whispered in response, peeking at some of the pages with wide eyes.
« Something tells me you're going to enjoy it more than him before he's big enough to actually understand it. » Raifort cackled, and she blushed. Well.... yes, probably...
« And here I was, expecting you to come over with some book titled "The downfall of the Paldean Empire for kids age 0-3" » Turo deadpanned, before raising one eyebrow with a puzzled look. Probably wondering if that was actually a thing. Raifort stuck out her tongue at him, and he chuckled.
« Oh! Open mine now! » Jacq said enthusiastically, and a second little packet floated in front of her. This one clinked slightly as it did so, and Sada's eyebrows raised as she opened it, curious.
She saw Turo lean slightly forward to also peer at it, interested.
It was a baby mobile, the kind you hang over the baby's crib and that the baby could play with or that would jingle and make little noises. This one featured little cute figures of Pokémon found all over Paldea: the mobile itself was in the shape of a Toadscruel, with each leg extending to support a different Pokémon. A Palafin, a Maschiff, a Kilowattrel, a Cyclizar and a Grafaiai, each one in a different, bright color.


« This brand is amazing, you can detach each little Pokémon and buy other ones separately! This way he will never get bored having to always look at the same ones, you know? And he can also learn about Paldean Pokémon! » Jacq explained as he stood up, gesturing excitedly.


Sada had the distinct feeling that somewhere on Jacq's laptop was a spreadsheet with the pro and cons of each single Pokémon carefully written down, and she smiled brightly at the idea of him carefully analyzing which Pokémon to pick .


« Thank you Jacq, really. » she said, earnest. Turo simply nodded, but she noticed that he was keeping his head down, his eyes a bit damp. Silent,he just put one hand on Jacq's shoulder and mouthed a "thanks".


The researcher scratched the back of his head, embarrassed.


« Ah, it's nothing, really...»


Finally it was Clavell's turn, and the last couple of packages got carefully placed on her lap.
Sada opened them one by one, laughing when she saw the content.


It was that Fidough onesie they had seen in that magazine months ago, and a small collection of many more, all Pokémon themed.


« These are way too much, Clavell, you really didn't have to...» she said; she picked up a little pajama with Smoliv prints, laughing at Turo's furrowed eyebrows in seeing the Pokémon.


« If he grows up and decides to get a Smoliv, I will hold you accountable.» he murmured, to which Clavell simply smiled. In his arms, Arven stirred slightly.


« But you wouldn't object to it? » he replied, to which Turo just mumbled something unintelligible and looked away.


Sada smiled, simply enjoying the flow of the conversation as it went on. She appreciated that neither of them had mentioned anything about hers or Turo's relatives, or complete lack thereof.


In the hospital, she hadn't missed how the nurses had looked at her weirdly - almost pityingly - when there hadn't been the usual stream of visiting relatives or grandparents excited to see their grandson.


But this... this was nice.


---
The first weeks of being a parent were both exactly how Turo had always thought about them or seen them depicted in media and yet nothing like it. Movies and stories from other parents always talked about the sleepless nights, the waking up multiple times during the night, the constant feeling of tiredness, and they were somewhat right... And yet there was so much more. Yes, he would wake up along Sada when Arven needed to be fed, or take turns with her letting him fall asleep so they each could just crash on the couch for half an hour. But he found himself noticing the smallest little details about his son, and usually the stories didn't mention anything about that. Like the fact that Arven barely cried; maybe it was because at the moment, he was still so small that he had no reason to cry expect when he was hungry, like Sada had said. But part of the reason was probably because both his and Sada's Pokemon seemed to come running and warn them before he even started to cry. It was an enormous help, and something that had honestly surprised him.
He had woken up more than one time in the middle of the night just to see Miguel perched on one angle of the baby crib, watching Arven with his red eyes almost glowing in the dark.
Ampere and his two companions usually hovered around the baby monitor; when the slightest signal would come out of it, the three Magnemite would fly off each in a different direction looking for him. It was convenient enough that Turo hoped that their evolution into Magneton, which looked very close judging by how close they always were now, would get delayed just a little bit more so that they could still split up to come search for him faster.
And because Magneton supposedly fried electronics just by standing near it, which would be... inconvenient.
Hopefully they could be trained to regulate the radio waves they emitted, or he would have to forbid them from entering the laboratory once it happened.
Arven had started babbling the last couple of days. The first time he heard it, Turo's heart had skipped a beat, thinking he was already going to speak his first words.
But that looked still a good bit away, according to their pediatrician. But babbling was a sign that the baby was starting to connect words with meaning and trying to copy them, so talking to them a lot was encouraged.
So that's what he did.
« There's still some bugs to iron out in the Tera sensors, and of course I need to simplify the code so that it can hopefully run on much smaller devices than the ones we use now... Best thing would be if it came installed on Jacq's Pokédex application, what do you say?» he said, sitting in the kitchen as he stared at the screen of his laptop. Arven was reclining in a baby chair, positioned high enough that he was eye level with him, and looked busy examining his own fingers by sticking them in his mouth.
« Ga-gga-»
Turo smiled a little.
« Exactly.»
He felt a bit silly pointing dramatically at random and going "Look! Ball!!" to a toddler, so Turo found himself mostly just talking out loud, like he would have done with his own Pokémon, enunciating every word clearly and watching Arven's reaction.
Every time the baby smiled in response or stared at him, listening intently to his every word and gesture, his heart soared with pride.
---
Days passed as Sada settled into her new routine. When Arven slept during the day, she would either lay down and nap herself, exhausted, or slowly keep working on her research. She and Turo were finishing drafting the official patent for the first version of the Tera Orb, who's prototype was finally completed. This one could terastallize a Pokémon for a couple of minutes. Not enough to change their type indefinitely like it seemed to happen with wild Pokémon, but enough for a quick battle.
« If we pitch this to the Paldean Pokémon League, I'm sure they would be interested. This way Paldea could have their own unique battle mechanic, like Galar with Dynamax battles, or Alola with their Z crystals.» Turo said as he pointed the Tera Orb towards Ampere.
They were both in the laboratory, Arven asleep in a second baby crib they had bought and placed near their desks so they could always be nearby as he slept.
Sada simply hummed in thought, moving to watch what would happen.


« ... and would that be enough to make them finance an expedition into Area Zero? Maybe not completely , but between them, and Blair, and... other people if our other research gets noticed...» she glanced at Bacon, who was wiggling his nose and eating a pile of berries.
She wanted to train him to prove her idea about Steady Glaciers -or Mamoswine, as they were called in this era -, but that would take some time until he would be strong enough to evolve, which also meant their Gym challenge would have to slow down.
At least they could still take turns in challenging each Gym like they had done until now, just at a more leisurely pace.
The Magnemite buzzed curiously as the light enveloped him: his two companions quickly strayed away, surprised, hiding behind Turo.
A moment later, Ampere slammed to the ground; it buzzed in alarm, his one eye widening as it awkwardly propped itself up with its two magnets.
Turo's eyes widened, and he crouched near the little Magnemite.


« Do you feel fine?» he asked, examining the Steel type. Sada leant closer, interested in seeing what type it had become. It wasn't always immediately apparent sometimes, like with Ötzi becoming a Fire type.
For now, the Magnemite didn't look much different... sudden lack of floating aside. The two other Magnemites were circling him, apparently confused. They let out little sparks of electricity towards their Terastalized companion, but Ampere didn't seem to react at all.
Turo frowned, rubbing one finger near the little screw on the top of its head before examining it more closely.


« This is... dirt?» he muttered.
Now that she looked more closely, Ampere looked a bit dirty, a bit like he had been when Turo had first caught it, half-covered in rust.


Dirt...? Wait... was it a Ground type now?


Sada gasped, a smile spreading on her face as she watched Ampere take a couple hesitant steps on his magnet-legs. The Pokémon looked more puzzled at suddenly not being able to float than anything else.


« He looks a tiny bit like Sandy Shocks!» she laughed as Turo picked the Pokémon up, holding him in his arms. Its two magnets flailed uselessly, the Pokémon apparently not used to being subject to gravity.
... Just like its trainer once was, she realized with a smile.


« ... You're right. This will be huge. This will revolutionize Pokémon battling as a sport, and Pokémon biology as we know it. The possibilities are pretty much endless. » Sada said slowly, examining the now Ground type until the Terastalization faded.
She glanced at the clock: two minutes and fifteen seconds.
There was still much room for improvement.
Ampere immediately started floating again, his two companions approaching to circle him again in obvious relief. Turo laughed.
« People will throw money at us to get us to improve the Tera Orb! »
He looked so confident as he grinned at her, that she couldn't help but grin back.
In his crib, Arven stirred, woken up by all the noise, and she rushed to his side.
---
Arven had been growing so quickly in the following months, she couldn't help but be amazed. She had read as much as she could about the development of very small children, but it still couldn't prepare her for the rush of emotion she would feel from time to time just looking at him.
It was like... like she couldn't believe it. The little treasure she had spent nine months carrying was now with her, and he was growing up; after the first few weeks, he already recognised both her and Turo's voices and faces. A couple weeks later, and he had started to smile at her.
It all seemed so incredible.
That night, she opened her eyes when Arven's cries suddenly woke her up. They weren't the familiar cries of him simply being hungry. She squinted, putting one hand on Turo's shoulder as he had also shifted to get up, and immediately noticed that something was wrong when she saw Kim sitting near the foot of their bed, her mane lighting up the whole room. The Pyroar's eyes were moving between them and the crib nearby. She didn't look agitated, and was even purring, but Sada still felt her breath quicken as she jumped up to check on Arven. What was wrong? Pokemon senses were so much sharper than humans, she must have noticed something- was there an intruder around the lighthouse? But Ampere or the others hadn't come running-
Arven's forehead was hot to the touch.
Absolute terror gripped her as she cradled the baby to her chest, starting to tremble, eyes wide.
The Blood fire. Just like with father-
No! This was a fever. Just a fever. They weren't dangerous in this era, people got them all the time, there was no reason to be afraid-
Arven let out another soft cry, squirming in her arms, and Sada held the baby tight, breath rapidly quickening as she caressed his face, feeling useless.
She could't help him, she couldn't make it immediately better, and it made her feel powerless.
« I-it's alright, shh... Shhh » she tried to soothe him, wishing she could just do something.
She heard the blankets rustle by her side, and Turo get up a moment later.
He squinted at the unexpected brightness of the room thanks to the Pyroar's mane, took one look at her face, and quietly put one hand on her shoulder as he touched Arven's face with the other. He pulled it back after a moment, a slight frown on his face.


« ... He feels fine to me. Just slightly warm. You know Kim would notice if he got too hot-»


Sada stared, eyes wide.
He didn't understand. He couldn't understand.


« B-but he's h-hot a-and crying in pain and... and what if he got the Bloodfire a-and -» she had lapsed back in her mother tongue without noticing, but Turo didn't say anything.


What if Arven was sick and-


She expected Turo to speak up again. To tell her that she was overreacting, or being irrational. But he simply squeezed her shoulder tight, and sat down at her side, watching Arven. Kim moved at her feet, laying down as she kept purring.
She kept trembling as she watched her little treasure for what felt like hours, even as he had simply fallen asleep again, praying for whatever was happening with him to just go away.


She must have fallen asleep at some moment by sheer exhaustion, because when she woke up, Arven was back in his crib. Peacefully asleep, mouth hanging half open with one thumb stuck in his mouth, like he had started to do in the last month or so.
With a gasp, she got up and checked his forehead.
He was perfectly fine.


The relief was so strong she felt her knees go weak, and she fell back on the bed.


Something white gleamed in Arven's mouth. A little pointy canine, just the tip barely visible.
Her eyes widened at the realisation, and she self-consciously touched one of her own with the tip of her tongue.


« Apparently, some babies undergo teething as early as four months old. » Turo said stepping into the bedroom with a warm smile. « I've called the doctor, and teething can give them a little fever at times.»


She followed him with her eyes as he walked next to the crib, watching Arven.


« I see... thank you for staying by my side last night. » Sada whispered.


Turo simply nodded, tracing Arven's cheek with one finger.


« He bit me last night when I was putting him back in the crib, you know.» he muttered, and she had to restrain herself from bursting out laughing to not wake Arven up, feeling lightheaded from relief.

 

[StolenMadWolf]

Well, time to make a return to this fan-fic for the second week! My usual disclaimers still apply, a focus on the setting and characters is generally what I focus on over grammar and stuff like that. Furthermore, I’ll focus my attention on Chapters 4 and 5 this time around.

Spoiler: Chapter 4-5 Review

Chapter 4 returns back to Sada’s perspective, and it’s nice to see her curiosity really start kicking into overdrive in this chapter. She is desperate to work out exactly what or rather who Turo is, and she is slowly working on pushing Turo for that information, even if it’s putting the guy on the spot as he fully knows what it could mean if he starts talking about where exactly he comes from. The language barrier clearly isn’t helping matters, but it is showing clear signs of improvement. She is also showing signs of being the Professor Sada we’d come to recognise in the games, namely the fact that she is already starting to throw theories together about Turo’s identity and background… and she might actually be getting closer to the truth than she realises. It does make me wonder how long it’s going to take until she actually connects the dots entirely, especially since Turo is already drawing details explaining what time actually is.

We also get the typical background stuff here as well… and damn, well played in the Mareep scene? I think it’s Mareep anyway? I honestly thought that Sada and co were going to hunt the sheep mon’s down, but nope, it’s merely setting the stage for Pokemon domestication! Sheep farmers!

Chapter 5 brings back to Turo again, and I have to admit I do find his chapters more entertaining to read up. Namely because this take on Turo is actually someone I could relate to, all the way up to the procrastination. He’s got the full picture to consider with the time travel, but he’s obviously having to think about what’s happening between himself and Sada. The Miraidon ride was sweet, and amusing when the dragon has to end up reigning Turo in from going nuts at the wheel of his living motorbike. Something I can really relate too. Whilst meeting the other members of staff wasn’t as interesting as Sada’s scenes, it does balance things out. And of course, it’s always extremely amusing to see good ol’ Turo finding himself out of his depth again in the ancient past, leading to both funny and nice interactions with himself and Sada.

Linking the two chapters up again for a moment, the interactions between both future professors (or past!) is still the highlight. There is clear progress in their communication, and we are starting to see their shared interests. Specifically Pokemon, naturally, and I can’t wait for when it seems like Sada will inevitably jump to the future somehow and see how out of her depth she’s going to get! It is heartwarming to see either way.

Also took me a moment to realise that the new feathers being found have got to be linked to Koraidon, so I’m going to be looking forward to seeing the ancient paradox Pokemon showing up at some point! That’s going to lead to an interesting situation to be sure!

My only real complaint is the use of dialogue tags, which you did at least acknowledge in the pre-chapter info. I’d use “ “ for regular speech and italics for thoughts, as that is fairly standard across fan-fics. If you really want something for taking into account the language barrier, then the << >> approach, or even * * could work in that case. It’s not a big problem, but something I’d consider.

All in all though, I didn’t think I’d enjoy a romance plot quite this much! Looking forward to reading on and doing a longer review later!

 

[ShiniGojira]

Hi hi! Hello! How are ya doing? Hope your day's going swell! You're my first target of the blitz, hope it doesn't disappoint.

Spoiler: Big Post

Chapter 1:

Alright chapter 1, so I have to say, really enjoy the fic right now. I love time travel whether it be the main thing of a story or just an aspect of it, there’s just something about having someone from the past or future interacting with people from another timeline that just makes my brain squee with glee. Guess I just enjoy seeing how one would deal with suddenly going into a place that's wholely different than what they're used to.

In this case, reading Turo lamenting about nature and the pain of trekking through uncharted territory with his feeble introverted body was fun. I know how annoying it can be having to wade through bushes or roots, he’s lucky he was semi-prepared with that futuristic get-up he’s wearing. It's also interesting to know how different the future is and… well a little depressing with how much in awe he was from seeing real trees, like damn how badly did humanity fuck up if not even magical animals could save them from themselves.

Anywho, after Turo gets through suffering in past stuff, he finally gets to meet one of the locals. AU Sada in all her cave woman glory. Their interaction was fun, Sada was nicely portrayed as the cautious perceptive woman while Turo was just being the goofy doonk he is, trying to look weak and harmless so he does not get skewered by big pointy stick.

I especially love the ending part where his mind basically shuts down when his time anchor fully recharges and he basically broke rule 1 of every time traveller’s manual. Mr Panicked Scientist should know that just because something would dissolve does not mean nothing would change.

Have none of the time travel movies taught him anything?

Chapter 2 :

Onto the second chapter. This time we're seeing things from Sada’s perspective.

We get to see how Turo’s disappeared looked like outside of his ‘Yes Freedom!’ brain and thank god they didn't make the time travel flashy af. Like could you imagine just telling everyone you saw a man literally disappearing and appearing in a flash of light. One of these days, they're gonna catch him going home and they'll think he’s some sort of messiah or Arceus spawn. Like just look at his jawline! There's no way a mere mortal could have something like that with how supposedly out of shape he is!

Anyway, Sada like the true independent cave woman she is, gets excited and curious about solving this enigma of a person. I do like how her first thought of his disappearance was that he must've started climbing. As if she wouldn't have heard any rustling or thunks from his big ass shoes. Like unless he's a ninja, I don't think he's gonna be able to jump from tree to tree without making any noise.

Then it cuts to a scene with Sada asking her mom about Mr Panicked Scientist and wondering just who the hecking future is he. Kinda curious about how these ancestor spirits work. Like are they real or just made up? It kinda sounds real but I don't know, could be ghost-type/Arceus propaganda.

Now, she's determined to prove that Mr Panicked Scientist wasn't just a hallucination and she wasn't high on spirit, and she sets out to find him. I'll be honest, I was not expecting to see Turo again so quickly. Thought it would take another chapter or so but lo and behold, he’s here and getting chased by a Magikarp of all things.

You may think it's funny but Magikarps are known for being the greatest and scariest Pokémon. A team of them could even take down the Undefeatable Champion himself!

Sada saves him like the badass she is and starts verbally abusing the man for being an idiot. And the idiot himself has no clue what she’s saying.

The ‘Thank you’ scene was cute though and I feel like it's a turning point in their relationship.

Chapter 3:

So, a quick little note before I start. I've noticed a bunch of little typos and grammar mistakes along the way and pointed a few out. They're fairly small and I feel like they don't take the immersion out too badly so they're not anything to worry much about. I probably won't be noting them down as much as I go though, me smooth bran is too lazy to do that especially when it goes on for more than like five chapters.

Segue to chapter 3 review start!

Turo comes back to his future all safe and sound, I'll be honest, I kinda expected him to still be stuck or was only catapulted into the future a few days after he left especially with how chapter 2 played out. But I'm glad that wasn't the case. It's nice to read a fic about someone transported to another world or timeline and was still able to go back when he so chooses. Makes it a lot more interesting.

Future Pokémon are weird. PoryDos was cute, makes me wish they’d do something like that in the games. Like you could imagine how derpy a duckie Snorlax would look? That aside, Steelccino was weird, it being a result of IRL evolution rather than being built by humans was something I don't know how to feel about. It's… kinda sad but cool at the same time like Cursola.

Miraidon is a rather interesting case. It sounds like it's a pretty common Pokémon for people to own yet I kinda doubt they’d let anyone just own a Legendary so I assume that there’s probably one true Miraidon that has all the power of every Miraidon combined or something.

So Turo’s a dummy. For a scientist specialized in time travel, you’d think he would understand that prehistoric creatures are in a whole other league of their own when you compare it to their modern counterpart. Take real life for example, the modern sloth is useless and then look back at the giant sloth, a giant fucking nightmare. Doggos? Dire Wolves. Elephants? Mammoths. Not even bugs were safe from the prehistoric plague of making things bigger and scarier. Anyway back onto topic, Turo’s a dummy and was incredibly lucky to have Sada there to save him. Like who just walks around without a weapon when you're in a forest?

Anywho, Turo is mighty grateful to his saviour and is slowly nursing a crush while also gushing out about his first ever fire! Nothing like a hot flame to make your monkey brain go ‘Yes! Me make light! Me god now!’

And their little discussion with the paper was cute.

Chapter 4:

Dialogue quotes are a bit weird but it's fine. Just takes a bit to get used to. But other than that, they're fine.

Anyway, onto the review!

It's another Sada POV and I greatly enjoy her utter bafflement and theories about how Turo managed to survive this long without knowing basic survival stuff.

Their interaction was fun, it's interesting to see that despite the difference in the time period they were born in, they hold many similarities to each other with their eye of knowledge and observations. And Turo accidentally teaching Sada a swear word was a nice cherry on top.

Then theorising with her mother. It's nice to see their ideas on just who he is and it really feels nice to see just how thoughtful and kind Sada is deep down. Her feeling worried about some stranger she met only a week ago really speaks well of who she is.

Then the scene where they tame their first Pokémon, it's written very well and it really feels like I'm witnessing a historical event. Heh, too bad Turo wasn't here to see it.

Second meeting with Turo already has him under immediate scrutiny because damn, he's really looking to hit all the flags for the Butterfly effect, huh? It's kinda funny how bad he is at making himself not look super suspicious but at the same time, it's sorta cute how ditzy he is.

And their little stroll through the woods gathering feathers was simply adorable. I love these little down-to-earth scenes where the characters just bond without needing to say much.

Chapter 5:

It starts off with a report and I have to agree with Turo that simply explaining things in cold technical terms just feels like you're diminishing things, like you're merely entertaining an experiment or subject rather than speaking and bonding with them.

So, motor-dragon scene. I'll be honest and say that I didn't really enjoy it as much as the others though I think that's mostly a me thing rather than it being badly written. I guess when I was reading it, it felt kinda dragged on or down(?) with all the technical motorbike terms I guess? Dunno, guess it's just my fault for not liking the scene.

So we get Turo’s perspective of their stroll through the woods. And with all of this feather talk, I feel like we might be getting a visit with them real soon. Not quite sure if they said anything about the colour yet but I'm predicting it to be Koraidon, either that or a Paradox Mon like that Salamence (excuse me for not knowing their names, I haven't really played any of the recent games lol.)

Then a third meeting happened and Turo once again shows us his chin was all genetics and none of the work with him failing to keep up with Sada. Though it resulted in some cute scenes with Sada looking out for him and as usual their interactions are just adorable.

Chapter 6:

Okay, I just want to say that this chapter was great. It's not often I read something that feels a lot shorter than it actually was. Those 4k words felt like they went by like a breeze.

Sada POV was great as usual. Her taking his measurements and him getting flustered over it was cute.

The encounter with Koraidon was incredibly well written. The scene felt tense, great and it definitely makes me wonder why Koraidon didn't do anything to Sada when it could've. Maybe it saw a worthy foe? It didn't look like it was looking down on her. Or maybe it was just lonely and wanted friends?

And the ending. I wonder whether her seeing Turo dressed like a ‘normal’ guy is making her feel something, maybe the first stages of a crush?

Chapter 7:

Damn, this chapter made me feel things. Turo’s thoughts about how unfair life was, about how Sada was just born in the wrong time and his slowly festering guilt of wasting her resources on things he didn't need. Ah, it was great.

Then there was the PoryDos glitching out. I'm assuming that's the set up for Sada and Turo to be stranded in modern Paldea, huh? So, theory, is Dialga mad at the tiny humans for stepping into his territory and that's why PoryDos is flipping out? It kinda felt like it.

And we get Turo teaching Sada the power of written language! This certainly isn't the start of a Bootstrap Paradox or something! Man, it's really nice to see Sada getting so excited over learning new things.

Not much to say and I don't feel like repeating myself. So great chapter as always and keep up the good work.

Chapter 8:

A lot of things happened here. Sada taught her tribe written language, her befriending Koraidon and woosh.

On one hand, time travel is cool. On the other hand, Turo is introducing change, so much bloody change that should've only happened centuries later. I don't know if there'll be any notable consequences of Turo teaching a tribe what written language and how his influence could shape how Sada takes things ‘cause there is a substantial amount of evidence that this Pokémon world is in a Bootstrap Paradox and it's all because Turo is too empathetic. Like he's teaching her English or Japanese or whatever language Turo is using several thousands of years before it was invented. That's gotta do something to affect humanity.

Fluffyhead and Sada’s mom are also a delight in this chapter. It's so cute to see this grown ass woman acting all goofy-like with her new companion and death machine.

And Sada taming Koraidon was also great. I can't help but get some How To Train Your Dragon vibes (Dragon-type not withstanding) from this. It's also hilarious to know that if Sada needs something to be destroyed she can just use her flute like she's a summoner from an RPG.

Chapter 9:

Okay, so right now we get another POV with Turo and mostly about his side of things. I'll be honest and say that I don't really care too much about Turo’s home right now. It's not that it's badly written but more that I'm more interested in the interactions of Turo and Sada and how the past had happened.

That said, I do kinda like that we get to see Turo’s parents and how odd it must feel to have a child who's literal job is time travelling. And Miraidon being the little bugger he is.

And the Master Ball side plot. Have to say, I'm not entirely sure how all of that will play out. I'm half expecting Turo to not catch Koraidon and half expecting him to be pressured into doing it. It'll make for some great drama if the latter takes place.

And the meeting with Sada was great. Turo freaking out due to both Sada and Unexpected Dragon and now his stuttering mouth could keep still and now he's going to meet even more of the locals. Can't wait for whatever shenanigans to ensue.

Chapter 10:

I like that we got a bit of context on how Sada taught Koraidon some tricks. It's fun to see her go through trial and error to teach him how to obey her.

And her perspective of the flight was fun. Seeing the thoughts of one who hasn't experienced all of these things that I normally take for granted is always fun and it just makes me feel a bit more appreciative of just how far humanity came as a whole… despite all the bads.

And Turo finally meeting the locals, learning that he might've messed up in teaching humanity written language a whole couple thousand years earlier was great. Especially that end
ing scene. Will Sada ever confront him about the disappearing act or will the question forever haunt her until she breaks?

Now onto the line-by-line comments:

Spoiler: Line-by-line comments

He was, all things considered, pretty calm for a man who had just stepped into a time machine for the first time in his life and just got catapulted into an unknown time that was nothing like he was expecting. It was a lot more cold, for starters.

Oh interesting, we're immediately heading straight into things?

And that was.... Already not something he was used to. His time, barring some extremely remote (and extremely costly) places, was not.... Really big on the whole "living with nature" stuff.

Take it with a grain of salt but I don't think you're supposed to capitalise these words when you're continuing a sentence after an ellipse.

Point was, he was in a forest. A real forest, with real leaves. And the sun! A real sun, not an hologram with artificial light projected onto the walls of the laboratory so people didn't lose their minds not stepping outside for days!

You'd think with how much more advanced the humans of the Pokémon world are, they'd be able to take care of climate change but damn that sounds depressing as all heck. What were the legendaries doing during all of this?

Maybe he messed up the calibration of the machine and accidentally went back 140 years? No, the city was much older than that. 1400 years...?

Speaking of time travel, how exact can it throw a person back in time? Can it be as specific as down to the very second or just to a certain date?

The lab coat was.... Ok, the lab coat wasn't exactly required to time travel, or at all, but it was just rule of cool. He liked his lab coat.

Wonder if he'd get mistaken as a pharmacist with how much he wears his lab coat

He shouldn't. He really shouldn't. He should be running away and avoiding all signs of civilization to keep the risk of catastrophically influencing all of human history to a minimum. The Beautifly effect and all that.

I mean if you really want get down to the nitty gritty of the Butterfly Effect. Just appearing in the past, in general, would have already caused some changes since you're moving through the world, brushing against the grass, wind and whatnot. So if nothing bad has happened like him disappeared then I'm sure nothing would go wrong with him just accompanying the strange cave woman lady.

He could.... Write a paper on it, or something.

'Write' doesn't need to be capitalised here.

They will leave no trace and become useless the moment she used them all up. He clicked the pen and showed her how to write with it on the notebook, and was rewarded by her eyes immediately lighting up with excitement. She grabbed the pen and started doodling on the first page, completely absorbed by it.

And that ladies and gentlemen was how the first ever Pokémon Professor was discovered.

Chapter 2:

Did he... Climb them and start jumping from tree to tree?

The image of Turo jumping from tree to tree like a certain ninja was not what I expected to think of when reading a time travel fic.

Did he... Climb them and start jumping from tree to tree?

Someone else would have been suspicious, troubled.... Maybe even scared.

These two here shouldn't be capitalised.

He is too.... Clean

He is incredibly pale, like someone who hasn't seen the sun... Ever, and

So... Tidy.

These don't need to be capitalised.

Traveling (apparently) alone, with no weapons, no signs of tear or use in his garments or on his body, with clothes that were just begging to get him eaten by some creature... It was more than strange. It was impossible.

I don't know if this is what you're implying but it kinda sounds like the future, although depressing in the absence of nature, has little to no crime. No Pokémon or poké ball on him. Like I get that not many IRL people carry around a gun or a knife when they're walking around, but it is kinda weird that he didn't bring some sort of protection when... y'know, he decided to time travel. Seems like a silly little oversight when you think about it.

some lousy ancestor that he was if he didn't even have some great wisdom to impart.

Nonsense! Surely his clumsy running imparted way more wisdom than you realise, Sada! He was probably trying to tell you what not to do in the middle of nowhere.

He is starting to sound more like a spirit than a man to me.» his mother smiles shaking her head.

'his' should be 'her' and also it should be capitalised since it's an action tag.

What she hears instead is a muffled, panicked and obviously human scream. For a long second, she can't even move, dumbfounded.

Oh hey! What's he doing here? Thought he got back to his OG timeline already?

The Brutal Fang, it's vivid red scales glistening from the water it just jumped out from,

Red scales? Wait, I thought this was a Houndour? Like the only red scaled black creature I can think of is Salandit and that doesn't exactly screamed 'Brutal Fang' to me.

Not missing a beat and evidently not caring about being on dry land, the red and gold fish thrashes violently against the ground until it rights itself,

Wait, huh? It's a Chiyu?... Okay, give me a sec, I think I got something mixed up.

Oh, golden and red scales... it's- it's a Magikarp. He's getting fucking murked by a Magikarp, isn't he?

First thing he does is check his wrist, strangely

Okay, so if I'm reading this correctly, he either failed to go back to his OG time or this is his second trip. Though if it's the former that kinda means he has to wait for a pretty long time for his anchor to get enough charge to throw him back, right? If it's linear, like say a couple hours=a couple days, I assume he has to wait for like weeks, months or maybe a couple years to go back, which is a big oof.

but he just lowers his head and scoffs, looking almost... Embarrassed.Seems

'E' shouldn't be capitalised and looks like your space got eaten.

He suddenly looks so... Vulnerable and lost,

Shouldn't be capitalised.

But I gotta say, this ending scene was pretty cute for the very traumatizing event that Turo experienced.

Chapter 3:

This version in particular was made to look bright yellow with spiky, needle like feathers where his "wings" were supposed to be, and ended up looking more like a cross between a Psyduck and the legendary Zapdos... A little, puffy, dopey and kinda adorable Zapdos.

Hah, PoryDos is awesome and the art just makes it all the cuter!

Object is not considered a safety or sanitary hazard.

Really? Not even a bit on the sanitary scale? They're teeth and feathers from a time where the closest thing to sterilisation is cooking.

Time sickness" was apparently a thing: the human body -or living things in general

So Celebi don't count as living beings?

people not landing when and where expected, or coming back with amnesia.

So is this how you're explaining Fallers or are they a separate thing?

At the end of the day, it turned out, people just really liked to mash the shit out of buttons.

Lol yeah, give me a big shiny red button any day and I'll not hesitate to press it.

absent mindedly

This here should be one word or have a dash in the middle.

That sounded exhausting, how did people put up with that in the past?

With extreme reluctance.

He start following the river

Missing an 's' on this word here.

Is that how the move developed? Is that what it originally was for? To chase prey even on dry land?

Christ, you've somehow managed to make Splash sound threatening.

He start mimicking what she had just showed him, and in not even a minute his arms already start protesting about the effort they are definitely not used to performing.

Damn, guess that Gigachad face is just for show, huh?

Chapter 4:

"Dumbass"...?» she repeats, picking out one of the words from his muttering at random, and only because it sounded funny.

Turo freezes, a flash of horror on his face that quickly gets replaced by a stuttering, incredulous laugh that he tries and fails to contain.

Hah! That's good. First ever curse uttered and it's because of mister future man himself, I can imagine how she'll use it to annoy or embarrass him

they can use it's

Wrong form of 'it's' here. Should be 'its'

This... This is huge. If they can get it back to the settlement, they can use it's wool without having to scrounge up little pieces by what they found laying around, or by actively hunting them.

If they could get another of the opposite sex, maybe they could even start an herd of their own!

There's just one last thing to decide.

« ... What do we call it?»

Also I have to say, this whole scene was pretty damn cool. It's like I'm reading an incredibly important historical moment... which it technically is, I guess.

she's misremembering how long it was tree days ago,

Misspelled 'Three'

They find some feathers, but they are obviously not the ones they are looking for: much bigger, mostly white with a blue purple base.

Hisuian Braviary comes to mind.

She stares at them for a second while he notices and ties his mantle closed, slightly embarrassed. Those have to be the most useless and backwards clothes she's ever seen.

Turo be like: B-but it's cool! It's not useless if it makes you looks good!

Chapter 5:

Made contact again with a native"

Not sure why there's a ending quote there unless it either slipped in or the forum ate the opening.

No wait, it's supposed to represent that flickering thing when you're writing, isn't it?

Were would you even get true leather these days?) to

Misspelled 'Where' here.

with activity;his

Space got nommed on like a sandwich

That didn't stop people from romanticism about it)

Think it should be 'romanticising'

It made a certain amount of sense. Even in his time, not all Pokemon had slowly changed until they were basically recognised as different species like Miraidon and Cyclizar.

With all this talk about Miraidon and Cyclizar, I wonder whether any of the future peeps know about Koraidon since it hasn't been mentioned like at all when talking about Cyclizar and evos.

Places were humans have no business living in any case.

Misspelled 'Where' here.

Anywhere else, there is always a street lamp, or a display or a monitor that's on 24/7, or his Rotom Phone. His own clothes have stripes with a slight bioluminescence built into them.

So even remote locations are lit up? Like middle of forests and shit? Has humanity really spread that much? Makes me wonder how they deal with overpopulation?

Though if I recall correctly, they have gone to space and started colonizing other planets, right? Or am I thinking of another fic?

Sada started to rummage in her bag again; usually he is the one to embarass himself in front of her, so seeing her mutter something under her breath while avoiding his gaze is... the only word he can find is "precious".

Interesting to see her embarrassed over clothes of all things. Kinda weird that the concept of modesty already exist this early, it's not a complaint mind you, just something I find odd.

Chapter 6:

Was he really that fearful and wary of other people?

Sada POV's Turo sounds like a sad little puppy that she is trying (and failing) to not adopt.

« And that is... beautiful.» Turo whispers something to himself, something she can't understand yet. She will not be able to for quite some time.

Ah, you're tugging at my heartstrings with this scene! It's so adorbs!

Sada prowls through the underbrush, until she manages to catch a glimpse from the creature. It's definitely the one that flew overhead just before, and she finds herself staring at it in complete amazement. It's beautiful. Much bigger than the Slither Grip that it is currently staring down, it is standing upright on two strong legs covered in red scales like most of it's body, except for part of it's tail and throat that are completely black, and a white underbelly. A magnificent crest of big colorful feathers runs all along it's back and head, and she immediately recognizes them as the same ones she had used for Turo's necklace.

Oh, is this Koraidon?

She tries to draw it as better as she can in the notebook

This should probably be 'best', it sounds a bit weird using 'better'.

Chapter 7:

Dr. Romero Turo

I forgot to ask this but is his full name really Romero Turo? Like, is Turo his last name or first since he typically goes with Turo instead or is it like japanese where Romero is his family name instead?

... it is in my interest to ensure that users of the time-machine remain in peak physical and psychological condition. That is all.» it answered, then turned around and decompiled itself into code, disappearing inside the console of the time machine with a last beep that somehow managed to sound annoyed.

Tsundere rubby ducky moment?

It wasn't fair... how much the thought of her being both so close, yet so impossibly far away hurt him

Aw, it's so sweet to see that he cares so much about her.

Could have been anything. The settings weren't any different from any other jump we've done, so it shouldn't be anything on our part. Porygon 568 says that he sensed something right before deciding to cancel the jump. »

Uh, Celebi or Dialga interference? Or did Koraidon flex his muscles too hard and it broke spacetime?

Chapter 8:

Had there been... a flash of light right there at that moment?

Oof, I'm expecting some big 'Curiosity killed the cat' moment sooner or later.

That's not something that you can teach just with words and symbols. Same with hunting. You can tell someone the best spot to strike a Steady Glacier with a spear, but it won't stop someone from dying if he has never practiced doing it. »

I mean, yeah experience is important but I feel like having knowledge of something is always a 1000x better than just blindly winging it.

She is left staring at it in quiet awe.

Congrats! Sada has successfully linked with Koraidon!

You can't just show up every time and eat all my food.» she sighed quietly, watching it sniff around the entire camp, then look at her expectantly

Hah! She now has the primal Pokémon equivalent of Batman's Battering Tank.

Chapter 9:

this dude was everywhere while I chased Suicune, I swear-»

Lol wait, is it that guy from the Gold and Silver games? How the hell is he still alive?

Much cheaper. Faster. Less martians that accidentally elbowed you in the face to take a selfie with a view of the Earth in the background.

Oh, scientifically accurate martian humans?

Leandro Turo looked

Guess that answered my question of whether Turo's his last name or not. Though I do wonder why he gave her his last name instead of his first? Maybe as a way to be impersonal? Or is it because it's more convenient for the readers?

Thirty-two years ago, Jules I. Wells was the first man to successfully jump

Oh, the first 'documented' case of time travel. Guess Gold travelling to the past to beat up Giovanni wasn't well known to the public, eh?

Well... it's your responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen. Like everything else with our jobs. »

Well, that certainly doesn't sound ominous.

Those had also received some design changes during the centuries: it was completely white with a red line all around the perimeter, but how they worked was pretty much the same.

So Premier balls but they're actually special instead of just a bonus?

Nevermind, that wasn't just excited, she was euforic.

Misspelled euphoric.

He nodded, and was rewarded by the biggest smile he had ever seen on her, her whole face practically glowing - and then she jumped up and hugged him, throwing her arms around his neck, and he is left petrified with a mix of fear and excitement and oh her hair is so soft and tickling his neck and he has no idea what to do should he hug her back and not stand there like an idiot should he kiss her fuckhereallywantsto-

Haha! Mr Panicked Scientist has no clue on how to act around touchy woman.

Chapter 10:

Yes!! » she nodded, and Turo looked... conflicted. He muttered something incomprehensible to himself - "aw, shit-",

You've dug your grave, man. Now sleep it in

Sada is left staring at empty air, not a single trace left of him. It took her quite a bit to notice that she was trembling, frozen in place.

Oh shit. Curiosity didn't kill this cat, it broke it.

And that should do it for now. Don't know if I'll cover more this blitz but this has been quite enjoyable. Have a nice day!

 

[Flyg0n]

Spoiler: Chapter 18

He wouldn't do it.

Not... Voluntarily, at least.

Awww I love her confidence here, knowing he wouldn't ever volntarily leave her (as well as her immediate fear that he might have gotten injured and swept away). Its so satisfying to see couples have some surety in each other and each others character. But also oof, thats scary, because it means the option is involuntary...

They were lost, and scared, and hurt.

But at least they were together.

Sobbing,,,, aaauuuggh
I love love love this throughline that keeps coming up, I don't think I can ever get sick of it or these two. Truly my fav thing is this ravenous, overpowering, everything in the world may go to hell, everything can be falling apart, but if we're together we can handle it. Us against the world.

his friends, his whole life, and Mirai-

NOOOO MIRAIDON Love how he doesn't even want to think about it, and how Miraidon may not have been this huge thing in early chapter but how Miraidon was a constant presence in his life, so much so he can't bear to even think about him. Arggh

she needed to find a name for it... Dark Talons?

I adore that the very first thought Sada has upon seeing a new pokemon is to name it. What a nerd. I love her.

No, she needed something else; something still as swift and deadly, but with more versatility.

She needed to make a bow.

*monster hunter theme song plays*
I just love seeing Sada's skillset come into play.

Clavell had to repress a chuckle as he, with some regret, marked the question as incorrect.

Clavell POV! Also this is hilarious, i imagine he gets some wild responses to test questions hah. I love the way you work in these cheeky self aware references, it adds souch charm.

After all, nobody had been in Area Zero since decades.

I'm sure its nothing.

Spoiler: Chapter 19

He had managed to find a matchbook and some candles inside a drawer in the small kitchen, and stared at the little packet for a good five seconds, feeling like he was about to embarrass himself. He had never lit a match in his life, obviously, but... Come on. He had made actual fire with his bare hands. Old movies made it look so easy!

Matches being foreign to him is hilariously delightful. I just love how much thought you put into even small moments like this; how out of his element Turo feels. Matches being outdated!! imagine....

The second one he almost dropped when it actually lit up, and he smiled-

Awwwww this was precious. It probably feels really cool to light a match if you never have in your life....

That was the problem with old analog technology like this; one little thing broke or even just got a bit too much dust on it, and suddenly nothing worked. Or at least, that's how it seemed to always be in media. And you didn't even get some error message about what was wrong.

This is so funny because right now I feeel like I prefer a lotof analog-esque stuff and touch screens are unrealiable, but I bet in the future, analog is way more unrealiable and tech stuff has become a lot better. Also yeah its true though lol, at least tech gives an error message (even if its often unhelpful, looking at YOU windows troubleshooter)

More than one time, he found himself gesturing in midair for a screen to appear out of pure habit to look something up, only to be left confused when nothing happened. This would take... a while to get used to. At the third time of waving his hand in the air, he let out a frustrated sigh and stood up, going back to the shelves.

ahahah poor Turo, struggle is real. Reminds me of those videos of kids tapping books or people used to a tablet having a brain short circuit and trying to zoom on the paper lol. Eextremely annoying though for him. I bet he looks kinda of crazy to people watching though lol.

« And if they did find me... they would already be here.» he added.

the time travel conundrum... if they knew they would have saved you by now.
But then. Maybe its not such a bad idea of your future self doesn't come back and stop you right lol?

She realized she had been shivering only when she heard Turo turn around and put one hand on her shoulder. It was warm, like him, and he slowly started caressing her shoulder, then her hair, and finally let his hand rest on her cheek.

« Sada... it's not your fault.» he repeated in a whisper, shuffling closer to softly kiss her forehead.

« We're still alive. We are still together.» he added after a moment, and that made her shivering slowly slow down until it finally stopped. She looked at the glowing lines on his suit, how they seemed to pulse slightly with each controlled breath he took, and traced one with a finger, slowly, until she came upon the barely visible outline of the necklace she had given him so much time ago. She gradually matched her breath to his, burying her face on his chest.

« ... yes. We're still together.» that was what she had to focus on. The only thing that mattered.

Screaming, crying, throwing up,
I love themI loe them I love them.
I love couples taking comfort in each other, finding safety and solace against the unknown UGHHHHH. Also physical touch between an established coupleis

so many of those electric rodents in the past they all kind of blended together to him. How were you supposed to remember them all? There was a different one in every darn region it seemed.

Perishing at this, I live for these kinds of comments lol. Turo being aware of the pattern is just hilarous. Don't worry Turo, there's probably too many to remember at this point anyway.

He was only sure it wasn't a Mincinno, because he knew what the ancestor of Steelcino looked like, and it wasn't that.

Steelcino sounds amazing. Also Mincinno as a pikaclone was somehow not an angle I considered and yet it makes sense.

« You have to teach them what you want with each command. Here-» Sada got the creature's attention by waving one berry around, and then waited patiently.

I like her being more experienced than him as a trainer, in a way, even though he's used to pokemon more than she is, he's not used to literally training them. Techo-mon are a lot easier to train!

« Help.»

AUGH this line just, got me all choked up, idk why it just. Its the simplicity? The one word, its so simple but so powerful its just. Help. AAAAa

He threw one of the Premier Balls on his jacket, letting out his Gyarados, and quickly climbed on the Pokémon's back, directing him towards the Great Crater. The water serpent flew fast and high, soaring high to avoid the Garchomp and especially Magnezone that loved to establish their territory there, before diving straight down.

FLYING GYARADOS 10/10. Also love the rerence to the Garchomp and Magnezone.

Paradoxical.

ROLL CREDITS? /j

Spoiler: Chapter 20

The man had... what looked like six whole Master Balls in pure white and red attached to his jacket. That was absurd! Was he... the Paldean League Champion, or something of that sort? Or were Master Balls actually common in the past?

THATS THE THING
AHAHAHA I love that lol. "holy smokes this guy is crazy"
"what these? they're just premier balls". Thank you for this joke, it was worth it hah.

propped up against the table on the little pillow usually reserved for Pokémon.

!!!! oh!!!! Pillow reserved for the pokemon I love, aaaaa
These details add so much. I need to remember to acknowledge things like this, I love seeing them.

People would call her Sada and nothing else. She didn't care how weird it would make her look here. Other than the literal clothes on her back, it was the only thing she had that was still hers. Begrudgingly, she had realized that she couldn't keep walking around with her clothes here as soon as she had jumped off that blue serpent.

oh. awwwww. Thats rough, poor Sada (hey maybe you should take a certain scientists name... wink wink...)

3) A weird combination of both.

I mean he's way wrong but also vaguely kind of in a ballpark.

Clavell was left completely baffled; his new theory already shattered. The man wasn't lying. His eyes were just completely devoid of any light as he looked at the horizon.

ohhhh ohhhh poor Turo. Home but so so far from home is so scary... agh my heart. hearing it described through someone elses eyes hits hard.

Now he could see her eyes shine, not with her usual curiosity, but with sadness. Tears, gathering at the corner of her eyes. He kissed her forehead, holding her against his chest as he tried to comfort her as she had just done to him, whispering a single "I'm sorry" over and over again. Her tears soon became little sobs that she tried to choke back by biting at her lip, her hands balling into fists against his bodysuit, slipping over the smooth fabric.

Noooo don't cry oohhhhh
These moments hit so hard, I feel so awful for both of them, so so far from everything they ever knew.

Two feet with sharp talons made of pure Hadron energy landed heavily on the floor, and the Pokémon, now probably as big as the legendary it had been inspired from, lowered his great head to stare at her with completely white eyes.

!!!!!!!!!!! YO SICK??? I didn't know he had some ind of edgy super form??? whooaaaaa

Spoiler: Chapter 21

The food here was amazing, and they had wondrous things she couldn't even imagine... but there seemed to be so many strange rules you had to obey to be part of the community. She had noticed people looking at them weird while they ate, and she had hated it.


It made her feel wrong just because she didn't know about these rules.
There was so much she had to learn. But first of all, she had to choose a name. A normal one, that wouldn't make her stand out... but she didn't even know what people here were usually called.

Poor Sada again. But also I know whooseee name u can take, kek. But also honestly all the power to her if she ends up like, taking her fathers or mothers name or smth? idk we'll see! Also man yeah, thats gotta be hard to get by not knowing all the weird rules.

Who knows, maybe the poor girl had been kidnapped by some criminal organization in Kalos and Turo had helped her escape... it would explain her lack of people skills, at least.
And... it would also somewhat explain the fact that she had apparently been more than capable of hunting Pokémon with a bow and arrows to survive.


But it wasn't only the woman that was strange; Turo had done his share of weird things himself during that lunch. From thinking that they still had Pokémon Centers to the way he seemed to look at every little thing with a mix of sadness and frustration. He also seemed to have a weird tic with his arm, because Clavell had noticed him make little gestures with his left hand, just to look crestfallen immediately after.

oh no Turo lol.
Highly amusing how weird other people find his behaviour but also sad, ya know.

Also I enjoy Clavell's theorizing hero, these are some fairly reasonable conclusions! Even the bit where he wondered if it was ghost pokemon or Zoroark.

« Yes, he...» Sada hesitated, not quite sure how to put it. Would "He's not great at moving around" sound strange? She also didn't want to put him down, because it wasn't his fault. In his time, people didn't seem to walk around much from the little she had seen; they didn't need to.

Dyin laughing but also this is so sweet and nice, I really appreciate that she doesn't want to insult him in front of strangers! This is so important and kind of her but I feel like its rare to get nice details like this, this level of thoughtfulness? I love it.

« Look Turo! It's all paper!» She whispered, in awe, grabbing his arm.
---
Turo stared at the wooden shelves that lined three whole floors of the academy, holding hundreds and hundreds of books.


« It's all paper...» He quietly despaired, in complete disbelief, looking around in search of even a single digital screen.

LOLLL this killed me. "it's all paper! " vs "its all paper "
Peak comedy. Feels like it'd come at either end of a commercial break type thing heh.

" It's all paper!!"

[full metal alchemist announcer voice]: TIMESLIP

""It's all paper..."

Sada's face fell, and Turo was sure he knew exactly what she was thinking about.
... he missed Miraidon so much. He couldn't contemplate having any other Pokémon by his side.

Oh noo

When will they get here? How??? I can't bear it much longer oh dear, I hope they arrive soon! Poor Turo, its especially rough bc he's been with Mirai since he was young...

Spoiler: Chapter 22

Did people just... read books and had other "scientist" explain stuff to them?

... Yes /hj
Also I am not sure if this IC or not but scietists should have an 's' at the end.

But also my first assumption was that because its Sada thats why the word is like that and if so, it works fine.

Mostly because most of everything in his time was automated. Dirty dishes? He just slid them in the sink and they automatically got cleaned, before getting teleported back to their place in the cupboard, ready to be used again.

WHAT
TAKE ME THERE OH NO

Poor Turo oh noooooo that HORRIBLE to lose that
It just TELEPORTS back to its spot????? NEKO WHY DO YOU TORMENT ME WITH SUCH IDEAS?

As much as she loved helping with the library in the Academy itself, she had to admit that she sometimes needed a bit of time to herself. There were just so many people around, and she just... wasn't used to it.

what a mood Sada, what a mood

« That Fidough looked ready to evolve. You can tell from their skin; wild Fidough that want to grow stronger look for matches against fire-type Pokémon or bask in the sun, training to sustain higher and higher heat. This makes their usually moist skin dry up and harden, until they evolve into Dachsbun and become completely immune to fire attacks.

Aww this is adorable! I love the idea of them purposefully seeking out battles like that aaaa

So this one was "Houndoom"... she still didn't quite like or understood the rules for giving Pokémon their names (her method still sounded much more useful)

It's ok Sada, I like your method still

... something in the whole scene struck a chord in her; she felt a weird sense of affinity with the creature. A little huntress left all alone, away from her family... s

Awww YES YES Litleo is perfect

... was she ready for it? Sada looked at the Litleo.


... Winged King would have grumbled because he would have to share his food with someone else, but then probably grow fond of her, she thought with a little smile. She could picture him sleeping curled up all around the Litleo, keeping her warm.

Im not crying you're crying go away

Seriously though Litleo is a great pick and I love how she relates to it and imagines Winged King getting along with it

He whispered in her language, and she felt a couple of tears roll down her face as she simply nodded again, holding the Poké Ball to her chest.

😭 This scene really got me all emotional, I loved this.

« ... ugh. Fine. Let's go buy a Poké Ball from the Poké Market for you and get you registered.» He grumbled, heading out into the corridor with the little bird perched on his shoulder.

I have to say, this really caught me off guard! I wasn't expecting a Murkrow as his first pokemon. (Actually my brain when first to Magnemite, then to the idea of an early model Porygon, what with the whole programming angle, but then Porygon might work a bit different here).

Not a negative, just definitely not the one I expected.
I do wish maybe the moment could have lasted a bit longer. In comparison to Sada, it happened a bit quicker but then I suppose it makes some sense, as to her taming another pokemon is different (though then again, she had Winged King less time than Turo had Mirai. But also Turo was more motivated to get one so he could be with Sada.

« ... Alba. Alba Sada.» She said after a moment.

! Ooooo I wonder what this means? I might have forgot or overlooked, but I don't see any other mentions of Alba? Maybe I am just fuzzy brained and missed it. Or it'll be revealed later.

« ... I assume "Sneaky bastard" breaks a school rule or two? »

LOLLLL

« ... offensive names are not permitted.

smh, the gf profanity filter strikes again.

You should do a gag where they try to pick another seemingly innocent nickname and they cant lol.

Apparently Cheddar isn't allowed on pokemon sleep!

They may look okay on a kid, but... ugh. And wearing them is required, isn't it? »

oof ouch, oof. worst part of the school. Good luck Turo i am so sorry

« So... maybe something like Clavell! "Professor Sada" and "Professor Turo"! »


« ... no way that's going to happen.»

ROLL CREDITS!!!

I live for the little self aware moments like this that play with time so this is perfect

They are both still mourning the loss of Koraidon and Miraidon in a sense, so I needed two Pokemon that they both had nothing to do with, as a fresh start.

Murkrow was not at all what I expected but I am very intrigued to see where that goes, its kind of oddball but also the personality of a mischievous little rascal thief fits after Miraidon I think.

Spoiler: Chapter 23

Turo simply grumbled in response; he wasn't looking forward to having to wear any of the different combinations of clothing the Academy offered

ME TOO MAN, ME TOO

I feel you, and if I actually was in the pokeworld I'd be losing my poor mind trying to find a way out of this.

« It's stuck to your beard! »


... yeah, that was probably why he hadn't eaten it in ages. He started to pick out pieces of cotton candy stuck to his chin as Sada kept laughing.


... worth it.

GGAAAHHHHH
How are they so cute?? I almost never feel shippy brained about couples (especially pokemon) but these two are the exception, and the little moments like this make everything so sweet. Heheheh

« Don't know. A simple name. Something like... Carlos-» a rather pointy beak playfully pecked at his earlobe.


« ... all right. Not Carlos...» He tried a couple of other names, but with more cawing noises, the Murkrow seemed to refuse them all. This was going to take a while...

shoulda named him bastard smh

« Yeah, um... it would sound strange, I'm afraid. You can't give names like you did to Pokémon in your language. Most people go for... short names. Cute names. And-» He added in a haste, as Sada was already puffing her cheeks out in annoyance.


« She's not going to stay "little". When she evolves, she will grow a lot.»


Sada grumbled, looking back down at "Little Huntress".

Huntress is a great name idk what ur talkin about Turo.

« You also looked pretty interested... so you like prehistory? Fossils are interesting, but the fact that you can never be sure of how things were at the time is a bit... frustrating. It would be amazing to just have a time machine to go see for yourself-» the woman was saying.


A loud snort made her stop and turn around, and Sada did the same, already recognizing who the one responsible for it had been.


Turo was walking right behind them, his bag full of books for the next lesson thrown over one shoulder and suspenders left hanging at his waist, trying to suppress a grin.

Also I am so here for this friendship! I love how both of them have made their own firneds at the academy.

The cafeteria was pretty crowded that day, and the lessons were going well. Sada seemed to already have found a friend, the history-loving girl who wished to have a time machine

« I-I know... but these creatures are just like the one I know... and the other book... »


The other book? He had assumed Sada had just grabbed two copies to have him read one, but when she lifted the Scarlet Book to look at it better, he saw that the second book underneath was actually different. A violet cover, with a sleek figure drawn in similarly stylized lines as the Scarlet Book, pointing to the right instead of the left, almost mirroring the other.
Nothing could have prepared him for what was drawn on the cover. He drew a strangled breath, suddenly feeling his chest ache.


Miraidon...

!!!!!!! OHHHHHH

Oh man yeah, this is wild for them, bc its canonically real. I am very curious how, I assume its got to be paradox/turtle shenanigans perhaps.

« We need to go back to Area Zero.»

Back to the Future
(or I guess for Sada, to the past ehehe)

Uh... Oh, nice! The little bastard actually did it!

!! ahahah I love that lol

Another thing: will I show them challenging the Gyms?
Nope.

Oh thank arceus lol. Not that I don't think you'd do a great job but yeah I agree, this fic is better off focusing on their relationship than gym battles.

Spoiler: Chapter 24

"And then what?"

He gritted his teeth, willing the intrusive question away for the moment.

"Even if you manage to get out, what then?"

It... It did look like a bird. A big one, with a very long neck, bright pink feathers, strong clawed feet but also... Its feathers looked strange, encased in crystals. They shimmered with a faint green glow, and some of them actually looked like they were made of tiny scales, like bug wings. It also had a couple of antennae growing from its head, which it seemed to be able to move freely.
So... Was it a bug or a bird? A... Bug-type bird Pokémon? It reminded her a bit of the Triple Runner she had faced with Turo some time ago.

OHHH I do rather like how tera pokemon appear here! Covered in crystals was also what I was thinking of doing and it works alot better narratively than hats (I think Horizons black rayqauza has a similar thing)

Why didn't Clavell allow her to bring her bow? She felt defenseless without it; was she really supposed to just... Stand around and watch Kim fight all alone? Giving her orders?

Sada proving once again she belongs in Monster Hunter Stories world lol. I do love her reaction is to say "nah bump that, throw rocks" which is great. She'd be right at home in manga verse getting in the action, heh.

« The crystal feathers have little scales like bugs, but under the crystals, they look fine-» She added.


« We have to... break it all.»

Ahhhhh this makes a lot of sense, I don't think I have consciously thought this way but this would be how wild tera pokemon work, and why you need to break through the crystals to catch them.

Clavell, and most people of 21th century Paldea as it turned out, tended to always have all the necessary equipment for a picnic with them at all times. Somehow. And picnic tables and spots were pretty much everywhere.
The whole thing struck him as a bit strange: had historians missed the whole Paldean picnic craze, or did they simply not consider it important enough to mention? Whatever.

eheheh this is funny. Welcome to regional gimmicks, Turo.

« ... You're just embarrassed at making sandwiches in front of Clavell because you suck at it.» She gleefully added after a moment, making him grumble unhappily.

NO its because the sandwich making mechanics are glitchy and bad and the portion sizes are absurd /j

Did it really need an entire block of bacon...?

I feel your pain so much Turo. Why are the bacons giant blocks.
Also lol, Sada is a carnivore girl after my own heart.

realizing how seriously out of shape he was compared to everyone else here had... stung a bit. Shouldn't it be the opposite? Sure, people... barely needed to walk in his time, especially in space, but... he had had access to better medical practices his whole life! He was protected against stuff that didn't even exist yet here! Was advanced medicine really the only thing keeping the people of his time upright?

Yes turo, it is /lh
you gotta touch some grass sometimes and get exercise (as I apparently see later lol)

Or were all those at the Academy just stupidly fit because they trained Pokémon and traveled a lot?

I bet pokemon trainers are SO fit. Walkings and climbing and carrying things. my gosh. it would do wonders for me...

He hadn't fallen sick, had he?

SICK ARC WHEN??? SICK WHUMP???? PLEASE

Sada was used to the two not really getting along. Or rather, neither of them seemed to want to miss an occasion to quip a little joke to the other's expense from their very first interaction.

Ahahah I am so here for their rivalry, I feel like they would be exactly the type to gripe.

She had been painted from the neck down, like a lot of people did at the time,

I think you mean neck up?

"An... Ancestor"?» she whispered.


« Ah, right... Someone from your family, in the past.» Raifort added. Sada's frown didn't disappear as she looked at the face of the woman in the painting.

!!!!!! Oh my gosh??? But how... Also I see everyone in the pokeworld is aware of the Ancestor gene being Strong, lol. Perinn be looking crazy like Adaman

« His Miraidon is gone.»

!!! Oh??? What does this mean? Interesting

Also its a shame my memory of what happened in the first arc is fuzzy; I remember traveling to the future and something being weird about Turo but not enough details to try and form theories, so I was very intrigued.

Also I think for the first time I struggled a bit at the end of this chapter to know who was speaking? I admittedly was reading a bit fast but it probably couldn't hurt to keep an eye on formatting and maybe add a 'Vega said' or 'Ortega said'.

Spoiler: Chapter 25

Turo walked out of the classroom feeling pretty lightheaded, and definitely not because of his current physical state. That painting of "Professor Olim" had shaken him; it couldn't be a coincidence. It had to be proof that he and Sada would manage to find a way to travel through time, there was no other explanation.
Seeing it had also suddenly brought another memory of his to mind: that time he had travelled to the future with Ortega and Moreau, and how that teenage girl seemed to know him... Or at least, had definitely recognized him.

Tsk Turo...

I wonder if maybe the AI selves or something end up in the respective places or they really do go seperate ways later? I am so xcited to see where this goes...

« You don't look fine... You're shivering.» Sada added, approaching after having bid goodbye to Raifort. She touched his forehead with her hand, her fingers feeling cool at the touch.

I want him to have a sick chapter so bad lol

This was little more than a dingy little can held up with rope by Pokémon apparently famous for fighting each other. Who ever thought this was a good idea?

You know I'm with Turo here lol, this does sound like an insane contraption and that pilot doesn't give me any confidence.

She would have liked to talk more to the "pilot" about it, so she had given him her number.

SADA NOOOOOOOO
don't hit on the pilot pleaaasseeeee noooo

« I'm more surprised that this is news to you. How does someone go their whole life not realizing they are allergic to Smoliv oil? I

Ohhhhh I remember now, Turo isn't used to pokemon byproducts.

« And... You, I believe, have no idea what an allergy even is. I've observed you, during class. I know when you simply don't know the translation for something and ask Turo, and when you look completely lost on what a word represents.»

yessss YESSSS I love how observant he is here, I love how he pieced these things together.

« My conclusion is that you two... as absurd as it sounds... are not of this world. Rather, not of this time. You've somehow found yourself in Area Zero from a different era... did you?» he asked in a low voice.

I LOVE SMART AND INTELLIGENT CHARACTERS I LOVE IT
YES. I love love love that he basically came to the correct (and most sane) conclusion on his own, like a proper scientist. Not dismissing just because it seems too farfetch'd. Because reasonable, time travel explains it all the best, and he should catch on.

He didn't want to mention the "forbidden romance" theory. He had really liked that one, and letting it go had been hard. He was a bit of a sappy hopeless romantic.

omg hopeless romantic Clavell feels right

« Two people from completely different times meeting by chance... So I was right! It is a forbidden romance!» he gleefully exclaimed.

His ship is so back y'all

He somewhat wished that they would have confessed their situation to him from the start, but he could barely begin to imagine what it must have felt like, to be in their place. Would he have done the same?

I really apreciated how all this played out. Basically deciding to tell him but also him having figured it all out, and some drama and tension but no huge blowup or conflict either.

It felt very reasonable and natural but also satisfying because Clavell isn't dumb and he ought to be able to glean the truth, even if he doesn't understand the full scope of it. It feels a lot more satisfying when characters can succesfully make reasonably intellgent deucins about the world around him, especially if said character is a scientist.

I'm very excited to see where he goes from here.

As a side note I wonder if anyone will mention like, Dialga or Celebi in passing? Kind of like "Oh wow so if you're from a different time did you get here because of Celebi?" or maybe they don't know of other regions deities in this verse....

Spoiler: Chapter 26

Now she understood why Turo had looked guilty every time she had urged him to eat something when he was visiting.

of ouch oh ouch. I do really enjoy the reversal of sorts that happened though, where now that Sada is in a "future" she understands how Turo felt coming to a "past".

but to her, it felt almost suffocating, how it seemed like she could never get away from the city.
And of course, every time she raised her head to the sky, she could never see the stars like she used to.

Man I feel like this living in the present I cannot begin to imagine just how disconcerting and frustrating it would be for Sada.

(Turo himself, on the other hand, had struggled quite a bit with the Gym challenge before the battle itself. Watching him push the giant inflatable olive around, gasping and cursing outloud as his Murkrow flapped around his head trying to help had been quite funny, even if she had tried not too laugh at him.
Well... Not too much.),

Oh my gosh this mental image is absolutely hilarious, poor Turo.

The Litleo would follow her in long, aimless excursions around southern Paldea, not caring or complaining if they simply walked for hours and hours, sometimes chasing wild Pokémon around. She was growing bigger and stronger: the Cortondo Gym had posed no problem for either her or Turo's Murkrow

OH they beat the gym!!! Also I love that she's bonding with Kim over this, it feels right. What an inspired pick for Sada.

Yeah, I figured so. But it's interesting, isn't it? Sometimes you'll look through history and find out that some random guy in Hisui was an ancestor to some other guy in a completely different region...

ahahahha yeah that ancestor gene be crazy, im glad someone brought that up again lol.

« Me? Oh, nothing much. My parents have an antique store, so I grew up surrounded by old trinkets... It's amazing what stuff people sometimes sell or stash away in their attic...

!! Is this canon? If not that seems perfect. Exactly fitting for Raifort.

It doesn't disturb wild Pokémon as much as artificial light would

aaaahhhh I love these little details like this.

So little in fact that the entire moment in time when her people had lived had been named "Prehistory"... Relegated to before "history " had even "started".
That had disappointed her quite a bit.

... oh..... Oh poor Sada, this twisted the knife in my heart. Stop killing me neko.

Now she understood why Raifort had chosen to let her Gastly out: an incorporeal Pokémon like that was perfect for not disturbing the scene.

!! Oh another delightful detail, that makes a lot of sense, I imagine ghosts like this would prove quite useful...

Even if it couldn't show any trace of emotion on its face, there was something in the way it was slowly rotating its head to observe the walls of the cave they were in that made Sada's heart ache.

😭 STOPPPPPPP NO

It raised its head and stared at the carved figures for a long time, unmoving. Its shoulders sagged, and it looked to the ground.

😭😭😭😭😭

« The picture...? Golett is the pre-evolution of Golurk. See?» she explained, pointing to the black and white photograph again. This time, Sada noticed the little description printed underneath.


"Professor Albora Olim the day construction of the Zero Gate started, along with her Golurk."

.... chills. Thats kind of scary, is it a self fufilling prophecy? is it actually just her ancestor, is it her? Oh man oh man

« So with a time machine I can go back and have another birthday party??» Romero asked, eyes wide and breathless just thinking of the possibilities. He could have all the birthday parties he wanted!!

ahahaha I love that, thats so 4-year old. Unlimited paradox birthdays. Now this conjures a mental image of a birthday party but its all Turo, like 20 baby turo's at his 4th birthday.

« What is it?» He groggily asked the small Pokémon. Turo usually slept with his window cracked open, so the Pokémon could come and go and night. He usually stayed up until late, so they kept each other company until he went to sleep.

Oh night owl! I like that, they suit each other very well. City bois who are up late.

« Are you ... are you okay?» she asked.


It took him a long moment to answer.


« ... not really.» he said in a low voice, hesitating a couple of moments before continuing.

WEVE DONE IT FOLKS, WE DID IT!!

Someone finally answers the infamous "are you okay" with honesty. Ground breaking.

But also on a more serious note I do love this as an indicator of how far they've come, and how close they are

« I... I just dreamt about... Home. My family. It still doesn't feel real at times. I keep thinking that I can just... Call them anytime if I want, get on a shuttle and go visit them, but... then it's like I suddenly remember that... they are not... here. » he tried to explain, ending with a sigh.

Turo suddenly shied away from the window, not wanting to see the moon just barely visible through it.

Oh.
I am dense and slow sometimes but It just hit me what he meant, what he was thinking about with the moon. I forgot for a bit he grew up on the moon. Man that would be. So weird huh, seeing the earth out your window, but now always seeing the moon and knowing there's nothing even there yet, ooohhhhhhhhh ow.

They existed as nothing more than memories in his head now, and he was afraid of forgetting even the smallest detail about them. He couldn't share anything about his life with Sada before, but... now... there was nothing stopping him.

Yesssss open up Turo. burdens shared are better that way. aawwwwww

« Mars is that... Other "world", right? And what's a "cousin"?» she asked immediately after, and he laughed.

Its okay Sada, I never know what a cousin is and I have one in my fanfic. I don't think anyone does. /j

Knowing that everything about your life is gone with pretty much no trace left, or that it doesn't even exist yet, and it's literally only in your head now?

They both suck in different ways, but I'm curious what everyone thinks about it!

Infinite pain both ways. I can't actually pick one, ngl, my heart aches at the thought of both.

Spoiler: Chapter 27

Sada frowned. Writing was so complicated. As long as people got the general idea, why did it matter what exact word sounded better? Why were there so many words that pretty much meant the same thing? It was so complicated.

Welcome to the joys of the english language Sada, lol

« So let's see... Someone caught a Flying type Meowth in the South Province-» she said, circling the general area it had been reported.

Missed chance for a flying Lechonk and to make a "when pigs fly" joke, smh /lh

« Yes, we were both quite curious about it. I'm Hassel and he is Brassius.» he said, putting one hand on the other man's shoulder, who simply narrowed his eyes and nodded stiffly.

!!! Them!! Its so much fun to see canon characters a little before the timeline of SV

On each of its two limbs and on its head were clusters of orange and red leaves, similar to the ones found in the trees all around. The leaves fell arranged in extremely long, thin branches all the way to the ground, and made the Pokémon look a bit like a weeping willow... or like it had extremely long hair.

Ohhhh I like this description of grass-tera Sudowoodo

Brassius had already ran inside, and they followed. The more they walked, the more he saw crystal formations cover the walls, until they emerged into an enormous, completely crystallized cave. The Sudowoodo had escaped inside, and looked at the four of them with fury. The tunnel was a dead end, the Pokémon having nowhere else to escape.



« Did it crystallize because it made this place its den...?» Turo wondered out loud. So staying near these crystal formations was the key to changing types...?

This has big MHS "monster retreated to its den" energy, ngl. I love it.

But that wasn't how she had approached fights until know.

I think you mean "until now"

« Kim, use Ember! Breath fire as hard as you can!» she encouraged the Litleo, who took a deep breath and started to breathe little balls of flame towards the Sudowoodo, one after the other, pausing to breathe less and less, until almost a single stream of fire was flowing through the air.

YAY FLAMETHROWER. So proud of Kim, good for you kitty.

« Tera Transformation...? »

Teraformation....

« ... because they stay transformed as long as they are encased in crystal...» he said, a little smile slowly making his way on his face.

OHHHHHH
AHHHHHH

I have to say, I really like this naming scene! I wasn't sure where this conversation was even going at first, but I love it, it feels pretty natural the way people circle around something trying to name it before something almost unrelated can spark inspiration. Also yesss I love that its still got their initials kind of.

« I think you are going to find it interesting... the destination is going to be Kalos this year. »

!!!!!!!! KALOS ARC???? I am HYPE

Four people and four Pokemon and needing to write in a way that feels like everyone is contributing is HARD.

it sounds like a nightmare and I don't blame you; but fwiw I thought you did a solid job here. Everyone contributed and it felt like a good staregy, not anything insane but good teamwork.

Spoiler: 28-30

« You could just casually go to the Moon?!»


He smiled a little bit as the plane started up his engine and decided to blow the scientist's mind a little more.


« Sure. I was born on it.»

Lol I love snarky Turo like this, its fun to see. I imagine that must be a big shock lol.

« We are, technically, still here as students and teacher. Regrettably, there seemed to be only one single room left. The other is a double... Which will be taken by Turo and me.» he explained as they walked through the cooridors, keys in hand.

There was only one bed trope, ehehhe
They were ROOMMATES

Turo, however, seemed to have gotten the message. There was a long moment of silence, and the hand that was still on her shoulder twitched a little, before he drew her closer and into a short hug. He drew a long breath, and she felt his chin come to rest on the top of her head as she leant into him.


« ... we are both not in our element, are we?» he asked, and she shook her head.

STOP BEING SO CUTE AND BREAKING MY HEART

« 48° latitude North, 2° Longitude East, more or less... this-» he said, turning towards her with the tiniest trace of his usual, almost invisible smile.


« Is where we first met.»


It took her a long moment to realize what he meant, but when she did, it took her breath away. Their very first meeting... of course.


The river.

😭

That's.... that's so sweet,,, augghhh

Also ngl for a second I really thought there would be a pokemon version of the love locks bridge (which I think was taken down irl).

Anyways I LOVE this aaaaa thats so so precious.

« Clavell...?» she asked.


« I have no idea who this "Clavell" guy is.» Clavell answered, raising one hand to flick his pompadour upwards.

CLIVES DEBUT

« It's the fact that you've been thinking about nothing but how different things are "here", and it's destroying you. I can see it on your faces, and I can't stand it! You're both thinking about getting into Area Zero secretly hoping to find a way to go home, don't you? Do you really hate it that much here?» Clavell added, almost choking on those last words, and Turo felt his chest tighten, out of breath as he suddenly felt called out.
By his side, Sada similarly seemed to flinch, eyes wide.

Oh wow this scene was brutal (emotionally). I can tell this is hurting Clavell too, not just seeing them like this but also he's grown to care about them, so if they go home he loses them too.

A pretty roundabout way to address the problem he's hoping to point out but it makes sense for Clavell, he's kinda a weirdo lol. I like it though, its sweet because he clearly cares a lot. I like the tension it causes.

Nothing remained of their language, their traditions, their beliefs and way of life...


Just her.

😭STTOOOPPPP

Apparently, it seemed to like that quite a bit.

AWWWW YES THE MAGNEMITE!!!! Bless. Give it pats!!!

A family with Sada. Something he could have never even dreamed about in his time. Something they could only do if they were together.


« ... yes. » he whispered.


They fell back on the bed as one, bodies intertwined.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🫀❤️❤️❤️❤️

Oh man oh man this entire section. Everything leading up to them, to their decision, for what Clavell fought for them to realize, AAUUUUGGHHHHHH
I love this entire Kalos arc, the way going to Sada's home was the catalyst for so much relationship growth, not just for Turo and Sada, but for all three of them. The real struggle of talking about their future coming to the surface, the thing they've been avoiding for so long. The museum scene of Sada getting angry and then breaking down, both of them comforting her, their training happening offscreen as well, everything was chefs kiss.
It really felt like the perfect end to the section, and such an effective use of place and situation to force character development.

They really are going to try and stay and even build a family, and, choose to be together.... WHY is is raining inside and someone chopping onions,,,,

There were two little objects hanging from his earlobes: one was a tiny scale of a bright pink color, while the other looked like a sharp tooth.

!!!!!!!! Oh oh its Huntail/Gorebyss

« Is... is everything okay?» she asked, walking up to it. She didn't really know how to approach the AI, sometimes.
It was a Pokémon, so maybe it liked to get a nice head pat like her own did.
But it was also a stupidly smart artificial intelligence with the capabilities of a supercomputer connected to a time machine, and giving it head pats felt...kind of... patronizing? Awkward?


The Pokémon turned around and fluttered his wings.


« ... Doctor Melany Vega. Apologies. I am in perfect condition. All processes are running smoothly. » it answered. Vega sighed, smiling sadly.

Thanks its not like I needed my heart

Robots/AI experiencing emotions hits me in the feels hard,,,, I love Porygon so much....

Iron Cloak, an evolved form of the Pokémon Mimikyu, looked... pretty much like its ancient counterpart, just with a different disguise. Instead of looking like a Pikachu, it now used more modern materials to make itself what were pretty much little mechanized bodysuits it would then crawl inside.
Right now, it looked like one of the Steelccino that plagued the main entrance of the University.

!!! OH I LOVE THAT
Iron Cloak thats brilliant.

I wonder how this development will add to things?? It looks like we're getting the Indigo Disk Terapagos in the past and now Porygon and Vega and Ortega looking for Romero... Will they end up in the present?
And Mirai/Winged King have both vanished, they must have run into Terapagos or that pool or something, maybe they'll somehow wish their way be drawn into the present then. I am looking forward to that a lot...

So much happening... Man I can't wait!!!

Further thoughts. Now that we're in the "present" currently, I have to once again laud the way the past and future are used in this story. I think a lot of modern media tends to either have a condescending view of the past (outdated, barbaric, unintelligent, etc), or a tendency towards doomer and distopic futures (evil technology, languishing humans, technologic takeover, etc). Or both. This sort of oh we were or are heading towards some terrible outcome.

But constantly this story showcases a more hopeful, neutral or even benevolent look. Like each time period is a different culture, not inherently superior or inferior. There's dangers and pros and cons of every generation, but the people in them are resourceful, good, intelligent and capable, all in their own ways. The past isn't full of dumb bumbling caveman, the future isn't full of cold uncaring psycopaths. The characters(Turo and Sada mostly) experience a lot of culture shock and struggle to adapt, but there's never a sense of trying to make any era look entirely villainized, but simply representing the differences in lifestyle.

My gosh is it refreshing! Fun! I know I gushed about this before but its just so evident and makes this a joy to read. Even with how pokemon are handled, when playing Violet I always felt a sense of unease about this robotic future like it could be some grim landscape devoid of life and living pokemon but the techno-future mon are still very much alive and its very cheering and delightful. All through time, different bonds between humans and pokemon prevail. Makes me all choked up.

I also love how much.... I don't know what to call it so I'll dub it "ambient worldbuilding". So many little details worked into each moment and each area, and the world feels so alive. So much thought goes into each part. Torches kept lit by fire-types because they disturb the wild pokemonless, the trained squawkabilly who compete for speed, smoliv allergies, how different things are made, the places people live (like the moon!), even how people have or have not adapted, like self washing dishes??? and just *chefs kiss*.It makes everything come alive so well.

I really had hoped to catch up on thr whole fic but I think I will not have time to make the weeks deadline, so have a review now and if I have time, I will hopefully read more!

 

[Spiteful Murkrow]

Heya, taking advantage of having jet lag from a cross-country flight in order to squeeze in another review of Timeslip since this next chapter looks a bit shorter than normal, so let’s go ahead and see what we’re dealing with here:

Chapter 8

Spoiler: Line-by-Line

Sada keeps drawing - or "writing", as Turo had called it - the symbols that Turo had taught her, still quite in disbelief at how they worked even hours after the fact, when he’d finished showing her the last symbol. It was just... Such a brilliant and simple idea, she still wasn't sure why the thought had never occurred to her before.

Your first sentence here felt a little unwieldy to me, so I suggested a potential spot that might trim things down a bit.

She didn't have to come up with a drawing for everything she wanted to take notes off anymore! She could just think about it and she now had a way to represent every single thing that came to her mind. And the best thing was, someone else that knew the symbols could understand it without having to ask her about what it meant!

I mean… you could’ve just simplified the symbols into a standardized set and made logographs, but it is a bit easier to memorize 26 versus 5000 symbols, yes. ^^;

She had to teach everyone at the settlement! Nerjik would love it, and the children... even if she didn't have enough paper for everyone, they could use charcoal and practice on rocks, or even just on the ground with sticks... anything would work.

It opened up so many possibilities!

Like the time police bursting in and dragging you off into the future. Even if Turo hasn’t appreciated just how much of a butterfly effect he’s been risking creating here.

« Did you... make all these?» she asked Turo after he had finished teaching her.

You She still had to remember what each symbol sounded like, but it was still much easier as a system than the one she had been using. She just needed a bit of practice. Now she was just doodling - "writing" - random words in all the pages she had already taken notes in, marking all of her little symbols with the actual words they represented, making them much more accurate.

It did have the disadvantage of taking up more space though... maybe she could use a mix of the two methods of taking notes? Drawings for quick immediate notes - on her map, especially- words for anything else...?

Ah yes, Sada is discovering how field notes work. Though that actually makes me wonder if Turo taught her Unown or just the day-to-day writing he used back in the future.

... she would have to think about it.

« ... no. My parents "showed" me.» Turo answered after a moment with a little smile, and Sada blushed slightly. Um... no wonder he had picked up that word, she must have repeated it quite a lot of times in her excitement in that couple of hours.

I mean, yeah, I can fully buy Sada saying variations of “show” a lot when everything about Turo has just been a

moment for her in this story.

He was quite fast at learning new words from her, she had noticed. If she used a single word that he had never heard but the rest of the sentence made sense, he would often pick it up just from context. The same usually went with happened for her regarding for his language, and... oh! Of course! Now she could just write down what some words in his language meant if she was afraid of forgetting it!

This was incredible.

Oh, so that’s how Sada becomes conversant in the “modern” speech used in Paldea.

Like right now, when one word he had said had stuck out to her.

« "Parents"...?» she asked, flipping to an empty page and carefully trying to write down each symbol that made up the word.

« Oh, um...» Turo thought for a moment « "Parents" are... the people that.... make you? » he explains after some hesitation.

I’m admittedly a little unsure if it makes sense to render a word that’s supposed to be foreign to Sada in clear language like this. I suppose one meta sidestep would be that her language has a term for ‘mother’ and ‘father’, but not a collective / neutral word like ‘parents’, but I might just be nitpicking here.

She stared at him. She had understood him, probably, there weren't many other things she could think of when talking about "making" a person, but he must have thought that she didn't, because he started to think of another way to explain it.

Okay, so I’m probably going to ignore the verb tenses in this particular part from here on out, but is this meant to be happening right now with Sada? Or is this specifically a prior incident that she is recalling? If it’s the latter, you very specifically want to use past verb tense to distinguish it from things happening in the “present day”.

And fails spectacularly at it, getting more and more embarrassed. He points at himself, then at her.

« It's... ah... you know... when a "man" and a "woman"...» now he's raising both hands, and starts... gesticulating wildly, vaguely miming two persons... well, it's either that or they are violently murdering each other and she had actually misunderstood what "parents" was supposed to mean. She has her doubts about that though.

I mean, alternatively, he could’ve looked off at the treeline to see if any of the nearby Pokémon were getting it on, but this is a non-18+ fic, so this will likely more than suffice.

« ... make a...»

Sada just keeps staring at him, trying to suppress a grin from spreading on her face.

It's... incredible how weird Turo could get sometimes. In a good way. For every basic thing he had never seen or couldn't do, it seemed like he knew ten more that she could have never dreamed of... but at the same time, he missed others.

I suppose that’s one way to tell that Sada’s not quite as bashful about sex as Turo is.

It was almost like his mind was so busy racing to the thousand of things he did know that he completely failed to see what was right under his eyes sometimes. Like right now, where the solution to his problem was so incredibly simple.

Sada giggled and started drawing again on the empty page. Two stick figures, with a smaller figure between them. She points to the bigger stick figures, then to the word she had written at the top of the page.

Turo stops his embarrassed sputtering and just stares quietly at the page for a long moment.

Sada: “Well, this is what you meant, right?” ^^;

«... yes. » he nods in a small voice, eyes kind of unfocused in a wide, disbelieving look. Probably wondering how he hadn't thought of just doing that.

It looked like even with writing the drawings were still going to be useful for a while after all. In any case, if his parents had taught him to "write"... was it something that was passed down from father to child? Part of his role as a sciaman... or a "scien-tist", as he had called himself.

Oh, so Sada’s present conception of a scientist at the moment is basically as a scribe, huh? Or at least I think that’s where this is going.

« Are your parents scien-tist ? » she asks, and he turns slightly toward her, raising a single eyebrow with a confused frown.

« No...? » he seems puzzled, like he is trying to figure out how she got to that conclusion.

Well, now she is confused too. This would be so much easier if only Turo was a bit more willing to talk about his people in general, but... everytime she tries to mention them or even steer the conversation in that direction, he clams up completely. Or gives her single word answers that don't really tell her much. Had it been anyone else, she would have been suspicious of him by now, but Turo didn't seem interested in approaching the settlement in any way. Chalo's theory that he was using her to learn their language also didn't look seem that possible plausible to her: she was doing the same with his, after all.

[ ]

IMO, you’re missing some sort of outro note to this scene before you move onto the next one. It might be worth going the route of something like “She supposed there was still much about Turo she had yet to understand.” or something like that.

When Turo stands up to get away as usual, it takes her a second to realize that she is still wearing his cape and she hurries to take it off and give it back to him. It had been fun to wear, so light that she hadn't even noticed it, and the half bags sewn on the front on both sides were pretty useful. She could easily do the same with some of her clothes…

Oh, so this is how she gets her official look in the games, huh?

Turo rips a page out of his notebook, and instead of the usual symbols for day and night that they have been using until now, writes down a couple of words to accompany them.

She takes the piece of paper and reads them aloud: the meaning is obvious even with just the sun and moon drawings, but she is determined to show him that she's going to memorize these symbols perfectly.

« Fo- f-o-ur d-da-y-s... h-e-r-e.» she looks at him for confirmation after she is done, and he gives her a sharp nod.

That actually makes me wonder if there are certain discrepancies between Turo’s visits that Sada will pick up on eventually, since weeks to months pass in between jumps from his end, so if Mesagoza gets snowy winters in his timeline, she presumably might notice things like his skin being paler from being indoors all the time even when it’s not seasonal.

Four days, though... that is no good. She has already been away from her settlement for more than five days. It wasn't uncommon for people to spend days away from the settlement - especially if they were out hunting, that took time - so no one would worry for a couple of days of absence, but... she really needed to get back before they started to wonder if she had been eaten by something after all. Besides, she kind of wanted to go back and tell everyone what she had learned. And about that red creature.

… Sada, how far are you from home here such that you can’t make it there and back in four days? .-.

So she shakes her head and scribbles over the words Turo has written, crossing them out, then adds some more sun and moon symbols.

« Ten days... and...» she hesitates a moment, uncertain. If she could slowly get him to agree to meet her in a place that was... more convenient for her, maybe...?

Turo:

Sada: “Turo, come on. Seriously, how is constantly being out here in the hinterlands with all the killer Pokémon not a giant safety risk for you?”

Where to start, though? They had a couple of common meeting points that she could use by now: the river where they had first met, the little camp she had set up in the woods, this one up the cliff... maybe she could point out a landmark to use as their meeting point.

« ... here? » she takes out her map and points to a place just east to the river where they had first met.

Sada: “You met me there once already, so it should be fine, right?” ^^;

« There are a lot of big rocks here, really tall... and I can start a fire as a signal.» she offers. The smoke would be visible from miles away even if he couldn't find the exact spot she meant. Turo doesn't look particularly convinced about her idea, but he nods slowly after a moment.

Yeeeeeeah, I can already tell that Turo would’ve nixed this proposal outright if Sada articulated that part about why she wanted to meet there.

« Ten days. » he repeats, before turning around to start making his way towards the forest. She watches him slowly get away until he disappears under the cover of the trees - she blinks and suddenly gets up, not sure of what she had seen.

Had there been... a flash of light right there at that moment?

Oh, so Turo’s starting to slip up in front of her. Well, more than he already has been.

« Come oooooon Fluffyhead, moooove--»

Chalo tried to coax the Spark Tail into following her, but for once the creature was being stubborn, preferring to chew calmly on some grass while refusing to budge an inch. Chalo had a rope made of leather in her hand, which was tied to a collar they had put around the creature's neck. Not that it would do much to keep it tied up: if it really wanted to escape, it could just burn the rope with the sparks generated by its wool.

You havea small typo here, and IMO the paragraph here works better off split into two.

« Pleaaaase, just show Sada what you showed me yesterday... » Chalo sighed and sat back down near the fire that was burning at the center of the camp, the beads in her dark hair clinking.

Sada had gone back to the settlement right after Turo had left, and had immediately taken it upon herself to teach the writing symbols to everyone. Her mother had listened politely at first, but hadn't looked that interested in actually learning them.

« I'm too old to move around much anymore, it's not like I will ever need to send a message to someone. Whatever I want to say, I can just say to anyone here. » had been her reasoning.

Well, maybe the time police won’t need to be sicced on Sada after all given that nobody other than Chalo seems to be interested in it.

« But... you could write down anything you wanted. And people could read your words... days, moons and seasons later, learning from them. You could write everything you know about sewing!» Sada had protested, but her mother had just shook her head.

« That's not something that you can teach just with words and symbols. Same with hunting. You can tell someone the best spot to strike a Steady Glacier with a spear, but it won't stop someone from dying if he has never practiced doing it. »

After all, theory and practice are both fairly different from each other. Especially when dealing with a mastodon trying to gore you to death.

That... was true, there were things that you simply couldn't teach, but she had still been a little disappointed in her reaction.

Luckily, other people had looked more interested. The kids - four in total in the whole settlement at the moment, the only ones that had survived until they learned to walk upright and talk - had been begging her to show her how to write all their names. Narjik, the old shaman, had been incredibly eager to learn just like she had thought.

That wasn't surprising, the man had gathered an incredibly vast knowledge of all the local herbs and their various effects in his life, and he knew all of their old stories and legends. He had been looking for a successor, someone to teach everything he knew before he passed on into the next life; this way, his knowledge could be left behind and taught to someone - many people - even after he was gone. He seemed to find comfort in the idea.

Whelp, looks like I jumped the gun on Sada not needing to get TVA’d over introducing literacy to her people after all.

Also, boy did that underlined throwaway deet get dark. Definitely period-appropriate, but definitely a sign of how Sada’s thought process and sensibilities are distinctly not the same of a modern person’s.

Sada herself had learned a lot from him, but she could never take his place as the next shaman... even if Turo seemed to think the opposite.

And she never will due ot the needs of the story. But I suppose that’s a story for another chapter sometime in the future.

She was currently tracing some of the symbols on a flat rock near the fire, using a stick of wood that had been left to harden in the ashes the night before and some ash. When she had covered the whole thing in symbols, she would wipe the ash from the rock to start again. Right beside her, to her left, Narjik was observing intently and slowly writing down every symbol she explained.

He wore clothes not unlike those of everyone else, with different layers of furs to protect against the cold, but the markings painted all over his face, neck and arms in black tint, even with the latter not being visible at the moment, showed his status to everyone else in the group. His hair that was turning almost completely grey was styled in an elaborate long braid that went way past his broad shoulders.

This paragraph feels long enough that it’s probably worth investigating places to cut it up into two. Though you also had a small typo with “against”.

Chalo, on the other hand, looked much more interested in talking about the guy himself than whatever he had taught her.

« Sooo... You've spent quite some time with this Terg guy now.» she chuckled, giving up on getting Fluffyhead to listen to her and picking up a stick of her own to copy her.

« Not... really. He always leaves as soon as it gets dark. Comes and goes every couple of days. » Sada doesn't even bother correcting her on the name anymore - mostly because she is pretty sure she is doing it on purpose at this point.

I actually wonder if Turo will get to meet the rest of Sada’s tribe properly sometime before his days time-tripping get cut short, or if that will wind up becoming a “what could have been” moment.

« Wait, what? » Chalo said turning to look at her, surprised. « I thought you were spending night and day with this guy by no- Fluffyhead nooo » she wailed when the fluffy creature decided to approach her after all and flop down right over the rock she was writing on, ash sticking all over its puffy wool.

It looked at the humans, sniffed the ground and let out a "Mareeeep". Chalo started to absentmindedly pet it, trying to get the ash off.

Ah yes, Fluffyhead has now literally become a black sheep.

« I was also under the impression that you were visiting his... camp, or group. » Narjik spoke up, eyes fixed on the "j" he had scribbled with ash. There wasn't enough space on the rock to write his name completely, so he wiped it and started again, smaller this time.

[ ]


« No, I... I don't know where he lives.»

[ ]


« Just follow him?» Chalo proposed, before there was a zap and she let out a little yelp, shaking her hand and glaring at the creature.

« Don't burn me, I'm trying to clean you up!»

A couple moments where it’d probably have made sense to elaborate on some combination of Sada and Chalo’s reactions to each other. Though I see that Fluffyhead gets right to the point when it’s in a “no touchy” mood.

« ...eep » it lowered its head and bumped its nose into her hand, nuzzling it.

« I don't think he did it on purpose.» Sada offered petting the creature, trying to steer the conversation away from Turo.

Unfortunately, the shaman sitting by her other side hadn't been distracted as much as the other girl had. [ ]

« You don't want to follow him.» he stated, calmly. It wasn't a question, and Sada nodded reluctantly after a long moment.

… Or it could just be Static in action. Though it probably makes sense to emphasize the shaman’s reaction a little bit before he starts speaking up and interrupting.

« I know he is hiding something, something he absolutely doesn't want me to see, and of course I want to know what it is... but I'm afraid that if I follow him and he realizes it, he will... just run off elsewhere and never show up here again.»

She thought back to the flash of light between the trees that she had only been able to see because she was looking down on the forest from the top of the hill. It had been over in an instant, and if she had blinked at the wrong moment, she would have missed it entirely.

It was just a nagging suspicion, but she was pretty sure that Turo had caused it, somehow. The flash of light, and his first strange disappearance that had left no footprints anywhere on the ground, or the way his boots and clothes seemed able to just suddenly... stop making any sound every time he walked away from her, after a while.

Maybe it wasn't exactly that. It would be weird considering how much noise they seemed to make at any other time, and they didn't make any sound because he literally disappeared.

The second paragraph here feels like it’s better off formatted as multiple smaller ones as Sada goes through her thoughts and periodically stops and ponders before moving onto the next.

There were creatures that could... "jump" between the air, disappear from one spot and reappear in another, she had seen them a couple of times. Was Turo... able to do the same? Then why didn't he do it when he had been attacked by that Brutal Fang?

It made no sense.

Anyway, that wasn't important right now.

I’m already calling it now, one way or another, Sada is going to wind up seeing Turo poof out into the future at some point.

« And I... don't want that. »

The confession came out at a whisper, almost covered by the crackle of the fire. Sada had seen him just a couple of times, but... there was just so much she wanted to talk about and discover and explore with him, the more she learned his language and he learned hers.

And... she wasn't sure how to explain it, but something about Turo struck her as... so lonely. Or... pained. Maybe it was just because he had told her that he had come here alone.

I mean, it helps that the closest thing that he has to a significant other right now back in the future is his motorcycle lizard. That and he very obviously has been starting to crush on you for at least 3 chapters now.

There were moments where she had caught him deep in thought, eyebrows deeply furrowed and one hand half stroking his chin, and then suddenly when she said something or called out to him that carefully constructed expression would slip away for a moment, revealing a sad half-smile that he would immediately try to hide again.

Yeah, see above. Especially since if / when his superiors get wise to how casually he’s been violating the rules of time travel, he’s likely going to be kicked from his job.

Every time she watched him turn around and walk away, she was a bit afraid that he would never come back again, that he had found another place to stay at. Or that he had decided to go back to his tribe after all. Wherever it was.

And so every time she saw that fluttering white mantle appear through the trees, her heart had started to skip a beat. It was always a bit of a surprise, since they never decided on the time of the day to meet at. [ ]

« Oooh, so that's what this is all about after all.» Chalo grinned with a knowing smile while she finished cleaning up Fluffyhead's pelt.

I think that you probably want some sort of transition back to Chalo speaking from Sada being in her inner thoughts about Turo.

« You've never actually described him, apart from "pale and weird looking". What is he like? ... physically, I mean. » she asked while Narjik went back to focusing on his symbols, not interested.

Sada blushed slightly; no, that's not what it was about at all, she was just curious about him... or was she?

Sada, if you have to ask yourself the question, the answer is obviously ‘no’.

« He is... quite tall. Dark brown hair and eyes...» she started to answer. Her mind though was elsewhere.

She thought back to that moment when she had been inches away from his face, or when he had guided her hand with his, pressing slightly into her side to inch just a bit closer. About the way how he would blush in that adorably awkward way when he was caught by surprise, before trying to compose himself. How he stumbled and tripped over himself while walking with her, but was a bit too prideful and stubborn to just ask her to wait to catch his breath.

Oh, so Sada’s starting to realize that she’s crushing on Turo herself, huh?

Or how he looked proud when she understood a new word that he had just used, or explained something in her notes to him.

« ... and scrawny.» she added after a moment, causing Chalo to frown a moment.

She was petting Fluffyhead again, apparently not minding the possibility of getting hit by another spark. (Then again, he was so fluffy and soft that she could understand her perfectly.)

« So not my type then. Then again, I'm still convinced that he is a creature in disguise- AH!»

The girl screamed, pointing to the Spark Tail, whose tail was... doing as its namesake implied and glowing slightly. After a moment, Fluffyhead's whole body glowed yellow and it released a great arc of pure yellow-white light that hit the ground a dozen meters ahead, charring it black. A great, booming zap made everyone jump and the kids start crying.

Uh… so, Fluffyhead’s not going to be sticking around the tribe grounds for much longer, huh? ^^;

« See? THAT! He did that yesterday! Now if only I could figure out how to make him do it on PURPOSE, he could help me when I go out hunting! » Chalo yelled, pointing excitedly to the creature and then to Sada.

Or maybe not, though I see that Chalo is bumbling her way into learning how to be a Pokémon trainer here.

She carefully observed the creature, whose tail had stopped glowing. So the more it glowed, the more powerful the spark it could create? What had made it glow so much? She thought back to what had just happened. The only difference had been...

« ... what were you doing when he did it yesterday?» she asked, trying to confirm her idea first.

« I had just fed him and was... petting... him... » the dark haired girl's eyes widened slightly.

Chalo started to rub her hand all over Fluffyhead's wool, getting zapped a couple of times. Just like she had thought, the creature's tail started to glow again.

Oh, so Chalo’s been building static electricity in Fluffyhead’s fleece. I actually completely forgot about those Pokédex entries that said that Mareep do more or less exactly this to build up charges.

« Yesss, look at this! » Chalo started to jump up and down, excited, then tried to get Fluffyhead to shoot another stream of yellow light in the same direction.

« Maybe... you could use a word?» Sada offered after a moment.

A simple command. They used various call outs to warn each other about what a certain creature was doing when out hunting, and she had seen various creatures do the same. And Fluffyhead had showed that, while not exactly bright, it was capable of paying attention to what humans were saying. It had learned really quick which words meant "food" directed at him, at least. Maybe it could also learn that doing a certain thing meant praise and pets.

So how long’s it going to take for Chalo to bumble into figuring out how to make Pokéballs next

« Right.» Chalo pointed dramatically towards a tree. « Fluffyhead, KILL THAT!»

... Sada was thinking about something a bit more subtle, but... as long as it worked.

Clearly there’s some teething problems that still need to be worked out. ^^;

After spending a couple of days at the settlement, Sada decided to go back to the cliff to check out the red creature. She had decided to name it "Winged King"; the winged part was obvious, and the King part had come from the fact that it seemed to be the strongest creature in the whole area. What had happened with Chalo and Fluffyhead had given her an idea; she had spent the next two days with Narjik, having him teach her how to carve a simple flute out of wood.

Oh, so that’s where ‘Winged King’ originates in this setting. Though I wonder if the other official Paradox ‘mons will also make appearances in Sada’s time.

She stepped into the place where she had been leaving food for the creature in the past days; the nest had disappeared completely, with the creatures that had lived in it probably deciding to move somewhere else now that a predator like Winged King was prowling around.

Sada: “Which… uh… I should probably be more worried about, but it at least the Winged King seems to have put two and two together that it won’t get free food if it eats me?” ^^;

She quietly left some berries, strips of dried meat, and even one egg for it, then brought the flute to her lips and played a single, long note. She waited for a couple of seconds, then did it again; nothing moved all around, the forest almost unnaturally quiet. By experience, she knew that was usually a sign that something big and powerful was scaring everything else away. Which meant that Winged King was somewhere around here. Sada quietly left, repeating the same little ritual for the next couple of days, always at the same time of the day.

Wait, but why a flute, though?

She wanted to see if Winged King was smart enough to associate the sound of the flute with her and the one who had left it food.

Oh. Oh. That’s actually really clever there.

The fourth day, it was already waiting for her by the tree, calmly sitting on its hind legs.

Ah yes, that’s certainly familiar from the game cutscenes.

Sada froze, her heart beating wild; this wasn't like approaching something like Fluffyhead. Sure, every creature was deadly to humans, but Fluffyhead didn't have it in its nature to attack something if not to defend itself. It was meek and shy, while Winged King was most definitely the opposite.

… Wait, implying that it’s the Adamant Koraidon? As in that Koraidon from the games?

But if it wanted to hurt her, it would have done so already. She kept repeating herself that while she approached it, playing a single note on the flute - it perked up at that, it definitely had learned what it meant. She gave it everything that was left in her smaller bag. It sniffed the air and got up, letting out a little "gyaaa" while it got closer. Sada reached her hand out, arm trembling slightly, only to pull it back when it growled.

Well that’s a sign that we’re leaning on the English localization right now, since I can think of one offhand where the ‘dons just straight-up do anime-speak for their cries.

All right, all right... she got the message. Little steps.

She managed to get closer while it was eating by approaching it from the side. While it was still focused on eating, she reached her hand out again.

Hesitated.

Gave a silent prayer to her ancestors, and then touched the red scales on its neck.

Well, someone’s a daredevil there.

For a moment, it didn't react; still busy stuffing its face. Or, more probably, it just didn't care because it had no reason to fear her. What could she even do? If she was quick, she could get maybe one good stab of her spear in before getting absolutely torn apart.

After that single moment, it turned one of its bright orange eyes towards her, followed a second later by the rest of the head turning towards her. She quickly moved her hand away, taking a step back, but it followed her hand with its eyes and sniffed it slowly.

Sada froze again, hand half-raised, unsure on what to do. Move? Step back? Approach it again?

Another paragraph that probably works better cut up into a few pieces.

Winged King seemed to decide for her, closing its eyes and quietly pushing against her hand with its head for a brief moment, before backing up and getting back to eating.

She was left staring at it in quiet awe.

I mean, at least it’s more dignified than the behavior from the Indigo Disk outro cutscene? ^^;

Another couple of days later, and Sada realized that her plan with the flute had worked maybe a little too well, because now Winged King comes crashing through the forest every time she plays the flute, as long as its close enough to hear it.

Koraidon: “... Food?”

And "crashing through the forest" was literal: she had been playing the flute quietly to herself one night and the creature had pretty much dropped out of the sky in front of her a couple of minutes later, scaring her half to death.

Ah yes, just like that one cutscene from the games.

« You can't just show up every time and eat all my food.» she sighed quietly, watching it sniff around the entire camp, then look at her expectantly.

Um… no, considering the alternative and how you don’t know for sure that Koraidon’s moved onto seeing you as “friend, not food”, you should probably just let him have the food, Sada.

With her notebook out she was busy furiously adjusting her drawing of the creature, now that it was actually staying relatively still in front of her.

After realizing that there was no food for him (her? She had no idea how to check), Winged King walked up to her and laid down behind her, starting to snore loudly after a while. It didn't budge in the slightest even when she cautiously pressed her hand against its scales, admiring them up close.

Oh, I suppose that’s one way to tell that Koraidon’s made the “friend not food” distinction after all.

With a satisfied smile, she went back to taking notes, quietly wondering what Turo's reaction would be to this the next time they met. Just a couple of days more.

Just wait until you meet his motorcycle, lady

Alright, made it to the end of what was a cute little chapter, which I take had the two primary purposes of A: starting to get Sada to realize she has feelings for Turo, B: getting Sada to start forming a bond with Koraidon, C: start foreshadowing that Sada’s on borrowed time as she starts getting into the danger zone of historical anachronism. Jury’s out on how accurate C will turn out to be, but the chapter seemed to pull off A and B quite well, and it was charming just starting to see Sada make the connections between the various bits and pieces of the world and the knowledge Turo shared with her together. Oh, also, Koraidon was adorable in his appearances, so that was a plus, too.

In terms of weaknesses, there were some polish issues that I noticed with this chapter. The normal quibbles about wording and paragraph formatting that have kinda lingered with this story thus far were back again. That said, I noticed in this chapter that there were a number of out-and-out typos, both from inadvertent word substitutions (e.x. “it’s” instead of “its”) and in words that were missing letters here and there. It would probably make sense at a slower season of life to take some time to step through things and iron those little errors out. There were also a couple moments where I felt it would’ve been nice to get an extra sentence or two of narration to do things like get into the heads of the characters or else to better transition to when we’re focusing on a different character, but I’ll leave it up to you to decide whether or not to do that or not.

Hope the feedback was helpful @Nekodatta . This story’s been a fun ride so far, and time permitting, I’ll be back for at least one more chapter from it before Review Blitz ends.

 

[CuteBunnyGirl]

I've read the first 5 chapters so far and they're fun! The premise and the story so far are both interesting, and the little details are fun to read, even those that don't have much of an impact on the main story. There are a couple of typos in some places but not enough to deter my enjoyment in the story. Overall, it's a fun story so far, and I hope it continues to be fun both for you to write and for me to read.
By the way, the typo I was talking about is this:

Were would you even get true leather these days?

It should be where, not were. But it's not that big of a deal.

 

[Flyg0n]

Spoiler: 31-33: Our Treasure

« So... we know that Groudon and Kyogre can influence the weather and shape the world, and they awaken from their sleep and fight every now and then... releasing a lot of "natural energy" when they do.» she hesitated, a bit unsure if she should go on. She still... wasn't really sure if what she was saying made sense. What if she was missing something obvious people in this time all knew? Her eyes landed on Clavell, who had been listening intently and gave her a reassuring nod, then on Turo. He was looking at her with wide eyes shining with pride.

That convinced her to keep talking, feeling a surge of warmth spread all over her chest. If Turo trusted her, then she couldn't be saying anything wrong, of course.

« Let's call this energy of them "primal energy"... what if... Pokémon have simply lost access to these older forms because there was a lot more "primal energy" in those times... and if they are exposed to this energy again in some way, they actually can unlock it again.»

« ... so you are saying that every Pokémon could potentially... "primal revert" to a more ancient form just like Kyogre and Groudon do?» Raifort asked, and Sada nodded, excited.

Holy SMOKES this is a BANGING bit of worldbuilding

Also OPSIE dasie for Turo realizing about the Hoenn disaster hah.

That had struck her as strange. She knew that the Pokémon she had called "Steady Glacier" were pretty much identical to the one they called Mamoswine here... but apparently people couldn't always get their Piloswine to grow up into Mamoswine, while in her time, all of them did. So she had looked into what all those that did evolve into Piloswine had in common.

« But those that do... they all have something they share.» she could feel everyone's eyes on her now, and straightened her back a bit.

« They all know the move "Ancient Power"»

!!!!!!!! YOOOOOOOOOO I love this I love this!!! Also man, I love Sada sm,
This is brilliant worldbuilding to link Ancient power to Primal Reversion to Paradox ancient pokemon.

« Where would you like to live, then? What would be something that you always wanted but could never get in a big city? » Sada turned the question back on him, and Turo took a deep breath and slowed down until they stopped completely. He looked around, thoughtfully, then finally looked up, towards the bright sky with not a single cloud in sight. She copied him and immediately knew what his answer would be when her eyes landed on the shape of the Moon that was starting to rise as the sun set.

« I suppose... Somewhere where I could watch the Moon and the stars would be really nice.» he said after a moment.

🥹 ohhhh,,,, Also love her anticipating his answer here, it really shows how well they know each other.

« ... Nothing » she said. She turned briefly to look back at the stairs they had just climbed: Turo had just walked them up all at once. Sure, he still was breathing heavily, and it had taken quite a while, but he had managed to do it without having to stop and sit down once, and he hadn't even noticed.
His health was already getting better by spending so much time travelling and actually moving around Paldea. She smiled, remembering their first meetings where a light walk would leave him completely exhausted.

Omg Turo workout arc,,, I am so freakin proud of him!!! Travelling and exercise nice. Man this makes me wanna go for a walk mmm

« You know what they say. "Work smarter, not harder"» he answered back, and she pouted, angrily muttering something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like "dumbass".

Oh no she's learned swears

Turo was suddenly extremely conscious of the extremely dumb and childish school uniform he was wearing compared to him.
Man, he wanted to wear his bodysuit so bad-

MOOD TURO

Forcing everyone to wear these should be a CRIME

Turo simply sat in front of his empty plate, stunned, before letting out an incredulous laugh and sitting back to enjoy the following Gym battle with his Pokémon.

... Moments like these were why he had fallen in love with her.

🥹 GGRAAAHHHHH

Three weeks later their Gym battle in Medali, they were trying to decide which Gym they wanted to challenge next.

I think it needs to be "Three weeks later, after their gym battle" or "Three weeks after their gym battle in Medali"

« So, um... do you think I could ask the Academy for a Porygon? » he asked the biology teacher, who raised his head from the notes he was taking and blinked.

!!!!! TURO GET PORYGON ARC WHEN

OH

WAIT

OH
OH IF HE"S REqueSTING ONE THAT MEANS PORY 568 CAN FIND HIM RIGHT??????? PLEASE

« That's.... that's adorable... » he finally squeaked out with a grin, getting a look of surprise from Clavell in return. Look at those cute little feet! Those primitive hexagonal eyes! You could count the single pixels in them!

I love this for him, just like people who love retro games. Porygon is a blessed mon.

« ... You mean those are not all at least part Steel type?» he asked.

« No! Why would they?»

« Because they... look like it? » Clavell answered like it was obvious. He pointed to a drawing of an Iron Bundle which showed its tail and neck extending and connecting to its main body with a cable.

Oh wow this is some fascinating worldbuilding/acknowledgement, interesting....

« So... humans and many other living things are largely made of water. Why aren't we all water types then?» Turo asked, crossing his arms to his chest.

This bit legit made me laugh out loud, which is a rare thing to get a physical reaction from fic for me, so congrats

« ... Pokémon in the future will really become like this?» he finally asked, and Turo noticed a hint of sadness in his voice. « I... I just can't believe it... how could it even happen? They... they barely look like Pokémon to me, I'm sorry. Those in the Scarlet book at least... look like actual living creatures, but these... they are all so... lifeless-»

« Why?» Turo snapped, suddenly feeling defensive. He stopped petting Ampere, the Pokémon floating between the two of them.

« What's the difference between any of these Pokémon and a Magnemite? Or a Porygon? Or a Claydol or Golett? They are all artificial in different ways.» he growled.

He wasn't going to listen to someone call the Pokémon he had always lived around and loved lifeless. Porygon 568 wasn't "lifeless". Mirai that would purr at night to help him fall asleep and wag his tail excitedly when he brought some treat home wasn't "lifeless"-

« I... I was just saying that... thinking about all the Pokémon I know changing this much... it would make anyone feel sad, I think.» Clavell cautiously answered, which only made him angrier. Well, it didn't make him feel sad! Those Pokémon were part of his whole society, his entire life until now!

Ohhh, Oh man this bit hit me hard. On a meta level, I was guilty of feeling bad/sad about the future mon, and how everything changed. (obviously I don't like, actually fault myself hah)

On a meta and character level though, I really love this acknowldgement and headon addressing it. Turo's right ! Why should they be looked at any different than any other artificial mon. They still think and act and have that life spark in them. Bless Turo being defensive of his 'past', of the pokemon he grew up with and how he sees them as every bit as real and worthwhile .

Truly, the future isn't gloomy or lifeless its just... a different culture. Nobody would travel to Alola and complain about the mon being island-y or something. I really like his impassioned outburst here, its so real and raw.

« I'm... Not sure I am... It's just a feeling... Maybe it's nothing? » she whispered, only leaving him more confused. How could she be "not sure"?

« I... Turo, I... I'm late.»

Turo simply stared at her. Late? What did she mean with late? Was it some strange sayings from her tribe that didn't translate well?

« W-»

* deep breath *

* long scream *

« ... We are going to have a child. Our child. And we can only do it because we are here, together. Our treasure...» she whispered, cupping his face with both hands.

A kid... A kid with Sada. A family together, all of their own, when the very idea would have been impossible for both of them to even dream of just a couple of months ago, each in their own time.

He... he was going to be a father.

* Insert longer, louder scream here *

I knew this was coming but I also was NOT prepared, I was like, OH SHOOT
I am screaming and crying and throwing up, how are they so precious.

AAAHHHH COUPLES

COUPLES AND EXCITED ABT BABY AAAAAA

OUR TREASURE

« ... what's a "pregna-cy" test?» she asked candidly.

Turo stared at her, before his mouth twitched. He tried to suppress a little giggle and failed. Sada pouted, and squeezed his cheeks as she was still cupping them in her hands.

*yahoo ask voice* pegannant? prenagant?

He just threw his head back and laughed, a wide booming laugh that left him completely out of breath, and then he kissed her.

They make me violently ill in the best way, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I love them

aaaaAAAAAa

« I... I... this is not how I imagined this would go...» he was getting flustered, and she calmly grabbed his other hand and looked him in the eye.

« Turo... what is it?»

He looked at her with wide eyes, and after a moment just blurted out the words.

« ... let's get married.»

YAAAAYYYYYY

« But now I don't need that. I have you right here. You know I don't care about all those details... and you told me that there is no right way of doing things.» she spoke slowly , trying to reassure him.

I love this I love this I love this, I LOVE nontraditional proposal situations, I love when the couple doesn't bicker or get mad, I love when they just love each other and are okay with this aaararghhhhgghghgh

Had he... put on weight? No, he hadn't noticed doing so... he was probably just remembering wrong because it had been so long since he had last put it on.

DAD BOD

The kid narrowed his eyes, not impressed. He was wearing thick skiing gear, a fluffy two-colored scarf with two massive Poke Balls at each end that made Turo's skin itch just by looking at it, and was holding a snowboard under his left arm.

« So...? Name's Grusha. If you have any problems with that...»

GRUSHA CAMEO YAY

Which was exactly why he shrugged, said "uh", and hastened his pace to go speak with Jacq.

I think "huh" or "uh huh" works better here to indicate a nonchalant response.

« That's what we hope... It may take a couple years to do so. You'll probably have graduated the Academy by then... and won a couple more snowboarding championships.»

« I'm sure you will. Break a leg, kid.» he laughed, and Grusha's eyebrows furrowed.

Fifteen years and a carrer-ending injury later, Turo would still sometimes think back to his choice of words and cringe about it.

Oh dear

(but also this bit killed me, I laughed at this too)

« I was reading this book about Unowns and how they tend to appear in ancient ruins... I wanted to know why there seems to be no trace of them in Paldea and other regions... and I read about this move they all possess, "Hidden Power". Apparently any Pokémon can learn it, and two Pokémon of the same species can have it manifest with the power of different types... isn't it a bit like a limited version of Terastallizing? » she asked, eyes sparkling. It was so fascinating, how a Pokémon's move could say so much about their biology!

Turo's eyes widened, and he started smiling.

YES connecting Hidden Power to terastalization!!! brilliant.
Also YES I love Sada bring so dadgum smart aaaaa

« You're... you're incredible! I... I love you so much -» he whispered in her ear in her language.

I think half my notes on this are just gonna be me yelling about how adorable these two are.

« Wait, you mean... you two were dating??» Jacq gasped, and Turo and Clavell groaned in unison as they turned towards him.

« ... Really? You even helped me look for apartments for two here in Mesagoza!» Turo chuckled.

« ... I thought you were just sick of the school dorms...»

JACQ PLEASE

this feels perfectly on point though lol. "wait ur dating"

YES

« Yeah! It makes no sense! » Sada argued, « "Age 0-3 months"? The baby will probably wear most of this stuff once!» and it was so expensive! Wasn't it better to use that money for more essential stuff that would last the baby longer?

SADA IS ME

NO SERIOUSLY why
Why would stuff cost so much and people spend so much for clothes they can't use??? Save it for later

« Is .. is that a little Fidough onesie? With little ears?» she whispered after a long moment.


« ... With a little adorable coordinated Dachsbun jacket.» Clavell nodded as he turned to another page.

Okay but they're both also me, because a Fidough onesie and Dachsbun jacket would go SO HARD and I would spend a fortune to have my own hypothetical child wear it,,,, Oh dear,,,, that is too cute.

Relatives would have come from all over, even Mars, and he would have watched the Sun rise over the Earth from the Moon's surface like it was customary, symbolically watching the first dawn together with his wife

😭 What an amazing tradition,,,,

« What? But that will look horrible! We can make the kitchen orange. Violet is much better for a bedroom!» Turo answered.

eheheheheh okay but using this to lead into what follows is brilliant....

« Right... no idea. Maybe it's all a big conspiracy to sell more trainer bags and backpacks. » he joked.


He took a sharp breath.

no no, you're onto something. I feel like womens attire is absolutely a conspiracy to sell more purses....

At the very bottom of the wall until roughly halfway up, it was painted in a mixture of orange and reds, warm colours that resembled the sky at sunset, blending seamlessly with the floor covered in wooden boards. Near the ceiling, the orange paint slowly got darker and darker until it transitioned to various shades of violet, until it got so dark it was almost indistinguishable from black.

😭Like the SKY

This is a GORGEOUS bedroom and I am SO jealous, legit would do a sunset gradient like this in my house if I could, and put star stickers on the ceiling.

He walked to the bucket of violet paint still left, and after throwing a meaningful look to Sada, dunked his whole left hand in it.


Her eyes widened, first in confusion, then in recognition. She wordlessly stepped by his side and did the same thing with her own bucket of paint.


Together, they pressed their hands against the wall, side by side, leaving two handprints in bright, shining paint.
Their own little personal family tree, just like she had back home.

Actually genuinely, irl got choked up abt this scene,,,, aaaaaaa

« Treasure! Family! Treasure!»


Spreading his wings, the Murkrow fluttered over towards the buckets of paint still half opened. Surprising everyone, he knocked the lid over with his beak and dunked one of his feet into the paint.


« W-what are you doing?!» Turo jumped up, fumbling to grab Miguel's Pokeball, but before he could stop him, the Murkrow had already flown near his hand print and, dripping violet paint, had pressed his talons against the wall, leaving an imprint of his footmark on it.


« Mreow!» Kim ran near him to do the same, dunking one paw in Sada's red paint and pressing it underneath Sada's own handprint. Ötzi and Ampere followed soon after, the Golett leaving a big handprint near the Litleo's while the Magnemite hesitantly tipped one of its magnets inside the paint and then at the wall.

😭 Think maybe I almost actually cried a little irl,, got teary eyed.

all of them,,, their treasure and their family..... ALL OF THEM,,, and they understood and,,, 😭😭😭😭😭 Its a new family, a new family tree here, aaahhHHH

HRRRRRGHGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


GRAAAHHHHHHHH

This entire bit was like, its everything, Its everything, its like I feel like, the whole fic kind of leading up to this in a way? Meeting, falling in love, getting stuck, coming to terms with and accepting their new situation,,, the handprint, the family, the home,,,

This is it. This is Timeslip. Love can endure, love can conquer anything. No, it can't fix everything, not always. It won't be easy, either. but it can prevail over even the most challenging circumstances. Far from home, far out of depth, when everything is scary and new and alone. Just hold onto that love because its a treasure. The real treasure was the friends and love we found along the way???

The family we built, the ones we chose to stick with.

All the character interactions and little moments of the fic really build to this point to ellicit real emotions. No matter what small flaws or formatting quirks the fic has, the core far supersedes all of that.

All of this. The growth, the struggles, the love, the working together. It nails all that. Capturing the feeling of being somewhere unfamiliar, being out of place.... makes my heart ache,....

Spoiler: Bonus

« ... What was that one for?»


« The first kiss of the rest of our lives together»

AAAAA they're so cute, sheesh, neko stop it,

And there was another problem. He had thousands of reference pictures for every possible subject he could want to draw, in every possible angle, available at one swipe of his finger.

Holy smokes the art reference scene in the future must go so ahrd my gosh

« ... I've looked at you really carefully.»

« Oh... But that means that someone knows what it tastes like?» Sada wondered out loud, and Turo burst out laughing, scattering pieces of medical herbs everywhere.

« The Moon is... really just a big rock. I never saw rain until I went to Earth. Or... plants. Or clouds!» He laughed again, sounding amazed.


« Imagine never having seen clouds!»

man that is wierd I never even thought about that.... I love the attention to detail

« ... You'll never embarrass me. I want to learn how to do it with you, no one else.» She whispered back, and after a long moment, Turo simply smiled and leaned forward to press a long kiss on her lips.

THEM <3
A total sap for a "I will do it for you" stuff

« You just treat them like anyone else. Children are not stupid. » He answered, and she laughed.

YES AMEN TURO
Kids are so smart and just treating them normal is the best thing. All my favorite adults I remember as a kid were like that

« ... why make it so hot it hurts? » She muttered, and he had to laugh a little.

HAH WEAK /j

I take scalding showers all the time Sada

It was a little statue of Miraidon, or at least, as close as she could get to it. She had used the shape of Winged King as a base, and then removed or added details as necessary. Two thin antennae instead of the crest of feathers, smoother plates instead of tiny little scales. It had been the most detailed and difficult thing she had ever made by far, but Turo's expression as he wordlessly stroked the little carving with one finger made it all worth it.

* ugly sobbing * 😭😭😭
i KNEW it I knew it,,,, Ohhh thats so precious and also so samebrained its so hilarious

All these little drabbles are positively adorable and made me smile. I cannot with these two, I am so wholly and absolutely invested in them.

Spoiler: For All Time

« You went from barely being able to read in this language to writing a scientific paper discussing your theories in not even a year! You really don't realize how incredible that is?» he whispered.

YES GOOD

Sada LEARNED a lnaguage girl you're brilliant and amazing

« Of course. I'm terrified. I have no idea how to be a father either. But I think that no one does. And we will do it our own way. The only thing we can do is... taking it one day at a time.
Let's not get ahead of ourselves... you taught me that, remember?»

Absolutely sick with glee at this. Yes. yes. I love it. finding comfort in each other.

It turned out that planning a wedding was a lot easier when neither the groom nor the bride had any of the problems that usually were involved in weddings: handling the guest list was a non issue since it was so laughably short, and neither of them really cared about stuff like "what colour are the flowers going to be".

AMEN YAll its all so much better when you don't fusss, trust me. Who cares about flower colors lol

Boomerangs, fishing rods, poles, slingshots... her bow wouldn't look that out of place.

Adventures manga moment, hah. I love ths though, that trainrs would find lots of unique ways to use pokeballs.

As had long been tradition for people of Paldea in the past, Sada was wearing a striking black wedding dress.


Her shoulders were completely bare except for the sleeveless lace top that covered her upper body, while a tight black gown covered her legs... with a small smile, he realized that she had probably wanted to avoid a dress that was too long and cumbersome to walk in, or that dragged on the ground.
It wouldn't have fit her anyway.

WORK IT GIRL DANG????
I did NOT know black was the color but WOW if I had a wedding 2.0 I would be all over this. She sounds gorgeous

For a moment, Turo couldn't help but think that back in his time, his father would have done the same exact gesture, and he swallowed a lump in his throat.

ALSO I had to circle back to this cause,,, * ugly sobbing *

AWUUGHHHH the relationship between them at Clavell is another delight in this I absolutely did not see coming but warms my heart so much.

« Do you, Romero Turo, take Alba Sada as your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and not so good times, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself unto her for as long as you both shall live?» Clavell's voice rose steadily, and Turo had to take a deep breath to keep his voice from trembling.


« I do. » he answered.


« Do you, Alba Sada, take Romero Turo to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and not so good times, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself unto him for as long as you both shall live?»


« I do.» Sada's voice didn't hesitate, and he had to physically refrain from kissing her then and there.

* ugly sobbing*

for all time.

* screaming crying, throwing up *.

The vows were gorgeous. So simply, not very long or overly flowery but they're so fittting for them, simple and to the point, very meaningful and poignant.
The addition of this line makes me absolutely ill, with happiness. Also I have such a thing for seeing the chapter title in the chapter itself.

I now pronounce you Husband and Wife. »

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Maushold during a weeding

I think you mean wedding lol

Also thats such a precious and adorable tradition

« I wanted something to always remind you to not lose sight of what's important. The fact that you are both here, together, able to spend the rest of your life with each other instead of... being separated in your own times. » Clavell whispered, and Sada followed the sudden urge to hug him, eyes stinging.

HHRRRGGHHHHH

Clavell friendship makes me ache, I'm so happy they found a friend and mentor in him. Also the hourglass is such a precious thing.

I love that he was so instrumental in forcing them to realize that they can choose to be together here.

As an aside, other stuff I forgot to mention:

- Oh Briar Heath cameo oh boy
- Mentioning one unified book, very interesting
- The tradition of how pokemon are included in the story is absolutely gorgeous and so sweet and fits so well.
- AAAA Also the gifts they're making for each other was so good.
- The whole bit and contrast of them reaching out to different friends to get help making the gifts was very sweet
- ALSO ALSO KIM EVOLVED HOORAY
- The whole bit catching Grafaiai was great
- Wait are we gonna see them give the gifts later?
- Very intrigued to see where the research with the shards and Area Zero goes? Im guessing this will be how Koraidon and Miraidon can come here...

UGH otherwise I loved this wedding so much it was so warm and sweet and romantic and stuff. I want to say more than incoherent screaming but I can't manage to articulate all my thoughts beyond that because this fic just makes me feel so much. It just activates all the parts of my brain that get really happy about romance and romantic things. Its so HARD for me to really buy into a couple wholeheartedly but these two, these two I do.

Spoiler: Lamiacaea

« Well you know how Magnemite needs to link with two others to evolve? I thought to myself: "But what if I catch two random ones and then they don't get along?" So I caught a whole bunch of 'em for you!»

AWWWW Thats such a nice gift hah, even if slightly complicated now, heh.

« Well, um... there's this tradition when getting inside your house for the first time as a married couple...»

She couldn't help but laugh a bit.

« You want to pick me up?» she had seen it enough in movies to know what he was talking about.

TurO YOU BIG SAP

This is absolutely adorable, what a sweetheart hehh

With a bit of a dramatic flourish -something told her he must have practiced it many times -, he pulled the cloth off, letting it fall to the floor.

Lol that does seem like something he would do. Drama king heh.

Sada barely noticed, her eyes widening as she took in the large canvas in front of her. The upper corners of the painting had been painted to look almost like leather, while the subject of the painting was the interior of one of the tents of her tribe. Not the big, communal tent where most of the tribe gathered together, but one of the smaller, more private ones. She realized after a moment that Turo had painted the canvas so that the perspective made it almost look like she was lifting one of the flaps that would act as a door and peeking inside, in a 1:1 scale. A little fire glowed at the center of the canvas, barely illuminating the couple of everyday objects strewn all around. A pelt, arrow-heads, scrapers and other tools made of bone and stone, little things left around as if their owner had just walked out.
It was a simple, everyday scene that she thought she would never see again.

« I tried to get it as accurate to my memories as I could... Before I started to forget.» she heard Turo whisper beside her as he put one arm around her waist
« But I didn't want to simply reproduce a tent in particular... I wanted it to feel... Like yours, in a way. » he added.

Oh wow this,,,, I think I'd cry if I was Sada, ngl.

This gift is so tender and thoughtful. They're too much

« Even if you are in great physical shape, it's better to be cautious... by the way, do you want to know the gender?» the doctor asked that day as she finished her examination.

« You can do that?!»
« You can do that?»

Sada and Turo asked in unison, the first in wonder and the second in genuine confusion.

dying at this reaction. TURO you know they can do that lol!! But also of course he woldn't really think about that

Comedy gold

« Well, um... » all male names he had ever heard in his life suddenly sounded bad.

I have no experience here but also this feels like an immediate mood. Reminds me of every time I want to name a pet or an OC and every name just doesn't vibe

There was a pause.

« ... Bacon.»

I named my Lechonk in SV Chris P. Bacon so....

« She had me in a cave, with a spear in hand, while my father was busy fending off a pack of wild creatures just outside» she took another deep breath, her hand trembling in his.

holy smokes thats hardcore sheesh

What about "Rose"?»

« Absolutely not.»

Turo's vehement answer made her raise her head again, puzzled. He fidgeted a bit at her side, apparently uncomfortable.

« That name's going to get... a really bad reputation in some years time. He's going to be hurt if we name him "Rose".»

DYING here
I love these little time traveler "hey uh.... no" moments.
Thinking about what names would be good or terrible is funny... Like what if Giovanni became popular before people knew he was a mob boss! Uh oh spaghettio when you find out hah.

I guess its useful to know that future here.

« ... "Arven".»

She almost missed Turo's whisper; he looked up, a strange glint in his eyes.

« From "Mentha arvensis". It's the scientific name of this small plant... there's some growing near the stream just behind the lighthouse.» he muttered, bowing his head again. « It has some pretty purple flowers, so I got curious about it the other day and looked up what it was called...»

Sada smiled. Yes.

OhhHHhooHH I Didn't know OH I love that, what a beautiful reason. Details like this seal the deal.

ALSO I JUST SAW this when I looked up his name: lamiáceas
LOL

Love that

The little hatchling from his human looked like it could't even do a simple Peck.
Then again, neither could his human, as an adult.

Smh humans, so weak

It was a brightly coloured book titled "Paldean goodnight fables for children", filled with beautiful illustrations of traditional children stories.
« It's beautiful... He's going to love it, I'm sure.» she whispered in response, peeking at some of the pages with wide eyes.

aaaahhh ys good I love. Good gift

« And here I was, expecting you to come over with some book titled "The downfall of the Paldean Empire for kids age 0-3" » Turo deadpanned,

AHAHAHAHAHA okay but thats funny

It was a baby mobile, the kind you hang over the baby's crib and that the baby could play with or that would jingle and make little noises. This one featured little cute figures of Pokémon found all over Paldea: the mobile itself was in the shape of a Toadscruel, with each leg extending to support a different Pokémon. A Palafin, a Maschiff, a Kilowattrel, a Cyclizar and a Grafaiai, each one in a different, bright color.

thats SO CUTE why do babies get all the good stuff?? I wouldn't mind one lol that sounds adorable

Sada had the distinct feeling that somewhere on Jacq's laptop was a spreadsheet with the pro and cons of each single Pokémon carefully written down, and she smiled brightly at the idea of him carefully analyzing which Pokémon to pick .

Do NOT let this man get ahold of pokemon sleep oh my gosh. he'd be spreadsheeting that game so hard lol. But then maybe he would also get some Sleep HMMM

It was that Fidough onesie they had seen in that magazine months ago, and a small collection of many more, all Pokémon themed.

YES THE FIDOUGH ONESIE
not fair though, why cant adults get cute pajamas or smth like this....

He felt a bit silly pointing dramatically at random and going "Look! Ball!!" to a toddler, so Turo found himself mostly just talking out loud, like he would have done with his own Pokémon, enunciating every word clearly and watching Arven's reaction.
Every time the baby smiled in response or stared at him, listening intently to his every word and gesture, his heart soared with pride.

GOOD THOUGH

Baby talking babies a ton is silly imo. You SHOULD absolutely talk to them normally, and clearly. Its better for development.

Days passed as Sada settled into her new routine. When Arven slept during the day, she would either lay down and nap herself, exhausted, or slowly keep working on her research. She and Turo were finishing drafting the official patent for the first version of the Tera Orb, who's prototype was finally completed. This one could terastallize a Pokémon for a couple of minutes. Not enough to change their type indefinitely like it seemed to happen with wild Pokémon, but enough for a quick battle.
« If we pitch this to the Paldean Pokémon League, I'm sure they would be interested. This way Paldea could have their own unique battle mechanic, like Galar with Dynamax battles, or Alola with their Z crystals.» Turo said as he pointed the Tera Orb towards Ampere.
They were both in the laboratory, Arven asleep in a second baby crib they had bought and placed near their desks so they could always be nearby as he slept.
Sada simply hummed in thought, moving to watch what would happen.


« ... and would that be enough to make them finance an expedition into Area Zero? Maybe not completely , but between them, and Blair, and... other people if our other research gets noticed...» she glanced at Bacon, who was wiggling his nose and eating a pile of berries.
She wanted to train him to prove her idea about Steady Glaciers -or Mamoswine, as they were called in this era -, but that would take some time until he would be strong enough to evolve, which also meant their Gym challenge would have to slow down.
At least they could still take turns in challenging each Gym like they had done until now, just at a more leisurely pace.
The Magnemite buzzed curiously as the light enveloped him: his two companions quickly strayed away, surprised, hiding behind Turo.
A moment later, Ampere slammed to the ground; it buzzed in alarm, his one eye widening as it awkwardly propped itself up with its two magnets.
Turo's eyes widened, and he crouched near the little Magnemite.

I don't like to nitpick formatting or grammatical stuff much but I had to pick at this.

Unfortunately I had to read this three or four times before I realized they were testing the tera orb on Ampere.

I don't know if its formatting or also just how it was written and the seperation between the sentence where they mention usng the orb and the action taking place, but it actually tripped me up pretty hard.

If it were me I'd either adjust the formatting and/or specifically mention again the bit of the orb? I know I can be a speedreader and miss stuff but just some thoughts.

WHEW LAD WOW. What an absolutely phenomenal fic, I am so happy to be fully caught up. Man. Great job on this, you can be proud.

I don't have any crit really beyond that small one at the end of the latest chapter I mention above, and some formatting quirks that can be fixed at some later time really.

The fics central premise and concept is to sell its core duo of characters, and that it does, as I said. The shining strengths of this fic are its characters, worldbuilding, and relationships. And it does all of that exceedingly well. I said this in my other review but I truly cannot stop thinking about it, how well it uses worldbuilding throughout each chapter and new circumstance to bring the pokemon world to life. For me especially it really feels like it blends gameplay elements and live world ideas in a really pleasing and believable manner.

Its just teeming with so many details that makes it all come together, often in really unobtrusive ways, through characters experiening them... Its such a clever setup too, the time travel is so effective here to give the characters a way to learn about the setting and to show the audience your setting. Honestly I am seething with jealousy in a good way, you nail that so much.

I want to same more but most of what I have is just more incoherent screaming, which was basically me this entire fic. I think this fic is my treasure, to find such a incredibly good romance. Until now I think I considered Crash Landing on You (that K-drama I mentioned) one of my only top favs in romance, but honestly this is probably really high up there.... I don't know if I can think of who else is on my list (save from a couple from this tv drama I watch) but if there is an official list these two are on it.

Which is big, honestly, I am so picky and opinionated when it comes to feeling truly and deeply invested in a couple. The way they are here is so... MMMM YESSSS because for me it just. CLicks every button. The relationship building into a friendship and then the romance, the way it feels rich and meaningful and an exploration of character and plot, not just making goo goo eyes at each other.

and NOW I finally caught up and get to see the beginnings of their next stage, I am so excited to see them bond with Arven and see Arven as a character. Honestly looking forward to it so freakin much...

Also deeply curious with whats going on with the raidon's, and those respective storylines. Boy I really hope we get to see them again sooonnn aahh. I guess we might, if the area zero research is coming along. I want bebe Arven to grow up with the lizards. Also I am convinced the Porygon thing will have to lead to Turo's Porygon finding him...

But mmmm if they find him that means Turo's friends and coworkers will. That will be a little awakward, but also very juicy drama potential....

I could gush all day but that timer for bliz is ticking down hah. Suffice to say...

GUD FIC UPDATE SOON

 

[Nekodatta]

Chapter 37: Lamiaceae, part III​

Sada sat cross-legged on the warm rug that covered the pavement of the lighthouse living room, watching Arven as he played with her and their Pokémon. Well, "played" was a tall word: at the moment he was mostly picking up some shapes she had carved out of wood and painted and threw them as hard as he could, giggling as he watched Ötzi dutifully totter over and bring them back. Turo was in the laboratory, working on his most recent paper about humans influencing Pokémon evolution, doing something that was called "peer review" or whatever. Apparently, when you wanted to publish something in a scientific paper, you got assigned some other scientists that would all comment on what they thought was wrong about it or offer suggestions, and you did the same to someone else's article.
She supposed it made sense; it was a way to double check everyone's work, but he didn't look happy about having to do it in the slightest.


She was supporting the baby so that it could sit upright; she remembered doing the same thing to the small children in her tribe, and finding it boring. Now, she was too busy observing Arven for the thought to ever cross her mind.


The way his eyes lit up every single time the Golett brought back his toy, the way he was slowly discovering new things and learning about the world, it couldn't help but make her smile.
It made her think back to all the times she had watched her parents work quietly in the communal tent, with wood and pieces of horns, scales and tufts of fur scattered all around. Those had been her toys growing up, and looking at Arven play with simple wooden shapes, she thought that he probably would have loved them as much as she did.
The Golett didn't seem to mind doing the same repetitive thing dozens of times; maybe it was just a byproduct of having been created as an assistant for menial labor, but she wondered for a moment if, centuries ago, it had done the same with other kids, maybe those from its old master. It really seemed to like interacting with children. Then again, a lot of Pokémon did. Maybe that was also one reason why most kids got their first Pokémon incredibly young.


She watched as Arven picked up a wooden block, shaped a little like a stick: he didn't grasp it properly and it slipped between his chubby fingers, falling onto some others blocks with a thud. Intrigued by this new sound, he picked the stick up again and started banging it against the other blocks with a newfound purpose. She saw Ötzi's shoulders sag a little, the golem apparently displeased at having lost the baby's attention, and she smiled to herself.


« I wonder when you will evolve like Kim did...? You will be able to fly, then!» she said to the Golett, and it puffed out a small burst of energy from its chest with a whistle, looking enthusiastic.


« But you probably won't fit inside the house anymore after you do...» she added, and the golem whistled again as it lowered its head, dejected.


On the floor next to her was a big, bulky book she had borrowed from Raifort; the one that spoke briefly about "Professor Olim". She turned the pages until she found the ones that spoke about her.
... Her biography seemed to match her own cover story in part. Born in Kalos, she had suddenly arrived in Paldea and immediately showed a great interest in Area Zero, researching the flora and fauna of the outer levels of the crater and helping develop the construction of Research Station 1, 2 and 3. She had apparently never ventured further.
But outside of that, a few blurry photos and that one painting shown during Clavell's class, info on her was extremely scarce.


"While she was instrumental in setting up the research stations in Area Zero for possible future expeditions, Professor Olim led an extremely secluded life and not much is known about her. She disliked public appearances and left Paldea after only a couple years, apparently retiring from research all together. The few pictures and the portrait done by an unknown artist are pretty much the only images that we have of her from that time."


Sada stopped again to look at the painting, an idea hitting her as she stared at her mirror image.
Was... was Turo supposed to be the "unknown artist" that would make this portrait?
It looked exactly like her, except that she didn't have that big earring that looked like it had been made from a Tera crystal and the subject in the painting lacked her necklace. She touched it, frowning slightly. That necklace was important to her; would she lose it in the future?


How far in the future was this supposed to be?


« Maaaah» Arven babbled, and Sada blinked and looked down at the baby. He was looking at the book with wide eyes, waving his arms in the air and pointing.


Sada's eyes widened. Did he...recognise her face? Was he saying...?


« Yes! That is Mama, Arven, see?» she smiled, and Arven giggled. Her heart started pounding. He was! He really was trying to speak!


« Romero!» she called out, hoping he would hear her and not wanting to get up. « Romero, come quick!» she repeated. Ötzi came to her help and ran out of the room. Some twenty seconds later, she heard the front door opening and Turo's steps walking towards the living room. He sounded busy in a phone call on his PokeNav.


« Yes, yes... thank you so much. » he was saying, but she wasn't paying attention.


« Maaammh-»


« If we could set up a meeting, I'm sure you would see-» he walked in at the same time that Arven started talking again, and she jumped up and slammed his PokeNav shut, ending the call. Turo turned towards her, his face contorting in sudden anger.


« What are you -»


« Shhhhh! Look!» she shushed him and sat back down near Arven, pulling the baby in her lap.


« Where's Mama, Arven? » she whispered and watched, mesmerized, as he eagerly pointed at the painting again.


« Maaa!»


She turned towards Turo, eyes smiling.


« Did you hear?»


He slowly sat down next to her, his eyes fixed on Arven.


« ... yes.»


The PokeNav started buzzing again, but they both ignored it, the device forgotten on the carpet.
---
Turo watched as Arven sat up propped against the couch in the living room, wide eyes staring at the space between the couch and the sofa where he was sitting like it was some insurmountable distance.
For him, it probably was.
Sada watched him carefully from one end of the couch, her hands busy knitting a little scarf.
Arven had learned to raise himself up more and more these last couple of weeks; he could sit upright without any help by now, and would sometimes pitch forward and hold himself on all fours, crawling forward.


Miguel and Ampere both seemed to find the baby's difficulties in learning to walk delightful. The Murkrow would play with the kid by hopping left and right on the carpet, barely out of reach, encouraging him to chase after him at a slow pace.


« Arven! Arven! Treasure!» the Dark type cawed.


Turo smiled nostalgically at that; Mirai would do the exact same thing with him as they bounced, almost weightless, back on the Moon, nipping at his arm to pull him along or wrapping his long, almost snake like body around his waist as he floated in midair, acting like some strange floating device that would keep him upright. Living his first couple of years on the Moon meant that, like many other people that had done the same in his time, Turo actually had memories of when he had learned how to walk under normal gravity the first time he visited Earth.


Now he looked at Arven, a faint smile on his lips as he looked at how the baby's eyebrows furrowed and his face contorted. His eyes went over him, and he saw the baby's mouth open, one arm stretching towards him almost like he was asking his dad to just come over and pick him up. Turo didn't move for a moment, pondering. Should he...?


A moment later, however, the baby's mouth closed again, and Sada laughed at how serious the baby looked now, lips curled in a deep, concentrated scowl.


« He looks just like you when you can't figure something out!» she exclaimed, and Turo couldn't help a little smile, feeling self conscious.


« ... do I?»


« Yep. Exact same stubborn frown.»


He kept watching Arven, thinking back to those first fateful steps he had taken on Earth. He remembered them like it was yesterday.


The space shuttle's doors opened, and Romero, four -almost five!- years old, immediately looked up at the sky, his eyes widening. The sky really was blue! And there were clouds! Just like in movies!


« Romero, stay close!» Mom's voice came from behind him as she and Dad were taking their luggage, but the little kid couldn't wait.


« Let's go, Mirai!»


He ran out, the little Dragon type following him, only to immediately stop as soon as he left the shuttle's artificial gravity, still set to the same level as the Moon's. He fell forward and slammed his face to the ground with a "oof". He blinked, not understanding what was happening. He couldn't walk. His legs felt so heavy. Why did everything hurt so much?
Even as Miraidon started licking his face, worried, the little kid couldn't stop the tears as he slowly sat back up, wailing even after Mon and Dad had come running.


Turo chuckled and shook his head. Learning to walk had been... an interesting experience. There were special courses divided by age for people who had lived part or most of their life on the Moon's reduced gravity, so he had learned together with kids of his own age. But consciously figuring out what normally was done so early in a kid's life... He watched Arven stare stubbornly at the couch he was using as a support, then at his tiny feet covered in socks.


On the Moon, you weighted so much less. Falling didn't feel so scary; it was slow, controlled, and gradual. Not here.


He still remembered being scared of those first few steps, how every movement felt sluggish, like he didn't know how to move his own body. How he had to take care in every step he took, how walking down a slope or flight of stairs had been terrifying. He looked at Arven now, as the toddler's hands trembled with the effort of holding himself up.


For a moment, he looked ready to sit back down on the carpet, where things were safe, stable and soft. Then the baby turned his head to look at him and Sada - no, he was looking straight at him. Turo heard Sada's knitting stop, but didn't dare look away for not even a moment.


Arven let go of the couch with both hands and took one wobbling step forward. Then another. And another.
Turo swallowed a lump in his throat, watching the baby's eyes look eagerly at him, arms outstretched and hands held high.
Then he tripped, but by now Turo had staggered forward on his knees, ready to catch the toddler. He was surprised, finding himself blinking back tears as he held the baby in his arms.


« You were so brave. Well done. » he whispered at a giggling Arven as the baby raised both hands to tug at his beard.
---
It was a bright morning, so Sada had brought Arven outside as she let her Pokémon train a bit. With the baby sitting firmly on her lap as she sat cross legged on the grass right outside the lighthouse, she watched as Kim and Bacon stared each other down. Well, at least that was what the Pyroar was doing. The Swinub, with all the long fur covering its face, was a bit more difficult to read. It was a little determined fella, however; the type disadvantages against the much larger opponent didn't seem to deter him from giving his all in a battle in the slightest.


« All right, Bacon.» maybe he really deserved a better name after all, she thought, but pushed that thought aside for the moment. That could wait.


« We are going to focus on your strong points, planning for when you will become a Steady Gl- a Mamoswine. » she corrected herself at the last moment. It wasn't that difficult for Pokémon where she had never seen their past equivalent in her time to just learn their modern name, but for those she knew very well, she still struggled to think of them as anything else but the names she was familiar with. They just made more sense in her mind; what kinda name was "Mamoswine"? It may follow the "scientific naming scheme" or whatever, but it told you nothing about what they actually did! With a name like "Steady Glacier", you already know that they were probably pretty big and slow, and they could control ice. There. Easy!


« Try attacking Kim with what Grusha taught you. » she said to the Pokemon. The Swinub huffed, then turned back towards his opponent, as Kim patiently waited for him to make the first move. The Swinub lowered his snout to the ground, scraped the ground once with one hoof, then started running towards the Pyroar. Once he was close, he dug his snout into the ground and lifted his head, trying to hit the Pyroar with a Mudslap. The Fire type, however, simply sidestepped the attack and leapt backwards, retaliating by batting the Swinub on the snout with her paw. Bacon snorted, shaking his head.


Sada's eyes narrowed.
« Did you try using Mudslap because she uses fire? » she asked, and the Swinub huffed.


« That makes sense, but having effective attacks doesn't mean much if you can't hit a much faster opponent... And you are only going to get slower and heavier as you evolve.» she commented.


The Pyroar would have been able to run circles around him, blasting him with fire attacks the whole time.


The Swinub looked dejected, but Sada got momentarily distracted as one of Arven's grabby hands yanked a strand of her hair. She flinched and gently pried his fingers away from them. Maybe she should start putting her hair up...


She thought back to how she saw Steady Glaciers fight back in her time. The times her tribe hunted one, what did they do? When they got surrounded, their enormous tusks and great back gave them really big blind spots, so they would often hunker down and use long range or wide hitting moves to try to keep them at bay, before trying to barrel someone over to escape.


They didn't need to have to move or aim in that case, and the only direction they would attack was straight in front of them... That was what she wanted to focus on.


« All right, let's try this. Bacon, retreat and use Ice Shard! » she ordered. The Swinub obeyed, shuffling backwards while firing rapid shards of ice towards the opponent. Kim growled, firing a Flamethrower to melt some of them and trying to avoid others, but still getting pelted by many of them. They melted on her fur, the Pyroar's mane sizzling as it got hit by the water droplets they made. A moment later, the Pyroar leapt forward, trying to close the distance with her opponent again. She opened her mouth, fire licking at her fangs as she readied an attack, preparing to pounce on the Swinub with a single leap.


Sada noticed the little Swinub flinching, scared by the fire.


« Mudslap, now! » she barked.


The Ice type reacted instantly, jerking his head back to throw more mud towards the Pyroar.


« Mreow! » Kim snapped her mouth shut and yowled, pawing at her snout as she tried to get the mud that covered it completely off. Bacon seemed surprised that it had worked. Sada smirked; Kim had to keep her mouth open for many of her attacks, and there were ways to take advantage of that.


« You don't have to try to match your opponent's speed. Play by your strengths and let them come to you. » she said calmly, before looking down at the baby giggling in her lap.


« Right, Arvie? Did you like that? »
She wondered if you could bring your kid to a Gym Challenge.
« Now, Bacon! Take down! »


The Swinub charged forward, his little stubby legs gripping the ground hard as it crashed headfirst into the Pyroar's flank, his hard snout eliciting another yowl of pain from the Pyroar.


« That's enough. Well done, both of you! » she smiled as the two Pokemon immediately snapped back to attention. Kim shook her head, scratching behind her ears with one back paw. Bacon nosed her, worried, and she started purring and licking his fur to reassure him she wasn't hurt.


Sada smiled, hugging Arven close. Being able to work with creatures like this, with a family, not having to worry about survival every day... It was like a dream come true.
---
Arven was sitting in his high chair, having just finished eating.
They were slowly moving him to solid foods, which meant that Sada and Turo found themselves both very carefully cutting little pieces of fruits and berries and mushing them to a puree; to Turo's surprise, Sada said that that part of raising a kid wasn't particularly different from her time.


Less sweets and already prepared baby purees, at the most. Some things were definitely universal.


Thankfully, Arven didn't seem like a picky eater: he had never refused to eat anything until now, and would actually often look at whatever him or Sada were eating with comically wide eyes, mouth open. It almost made Turo feel guilty about it.


At least his Pokémon looked happy to play with him to keep him occupied as Turo finished eating his sandwich.
Miguel was flapping around the kitchen, moving from Arven's high chair, to the kitchen counter, to the table, each time cawing out one word about random objects. The toddler giggled and pointed to another object each time.


Turo quietly wondered if all that time reading simple books and speaking to Arven had actually had the unintentional effect of increasing the Murkrow's vocabulary. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to what words the Dark type picked up. The vast majority of them were names, or food, a couple of words like "treasure" he must have picked up because he heard them so much, and of course "coffee", that he had taught him.


« Miguel. Come here just a moment.»


The Murkrow stopped his little game and flapped over to his shoulder, Turo slipping him the last piece of Chesto berry in his sandwich.


« I have something for you.» Turo said, putting the Dusk Stone he had received from Raifort on the table. The Murkrow's eyes widened, and it flapped down to examine the stone. Maybe instinctually, it seemed to know what would happen if he touched it, because he seemed to avoid doing so, looking up at him.


« With this stone, you will be able to evolve into Honchkrow.» he observed the little Dark type as he spoke. Miguel clacked his beak and stared at the stone for a moment. He... didn't look convinced, and after a moment stepped back towards him with a caw.


Turo frowned.


« You don't... want to evolve?» he asked, picking up the stone and turning it towards the Dark type again, just to be sure. Miguel gave another reluctant caw and backed away from the evolutionary stone, flapping back to his shoulder.


The Murkrow started to peck at his hair, nuzzling him, and Turo sighed, putting the Dusk Stone back in his pocket.


« Look, Miguel. We're going to get into places that are much more dangerous than the Gym battles and Terastalized wild Pokémon we've faced now. I need... more Pokémon in my team. And I need them to be as strong as they can be.» he said after a short moment.


He was definitely falling behind with his training, and he knew it. Only two Pokémon were not going to be enough to beat the League and get access to Area Zero... But he still hadn't heard anything about that Porygon, and didn't want to train anything else in particular right now. And even getting that Porygon wouldn't have solved the problem.


He didn't want to force Miguel to evolve, but...


« Why don't you want to become a Honchkrow?» he asked, and the Pokémon shuffled on his shoulder. Turo sighed, trailing one hand through his hair.


« ... Is it just because you will become big enough to not fit on my shoulder anymore, is it? »


There was an uncomfortable silence from the Pokémon, then a caw. He chuckled despite it all.


He knew the little bastard so well.


« ... Didn't think you were so lazy. I guess that's why we get along.» he stroked the Pokémon's feathers for a moment.


« If you change idea, you know what to do.» he said. Arven let out a giggle and clapped his hands towards Miguel, and the Murkrow flapped off his shoulders, eager to resume their little game.


Turo frowned for a long moment. He didn't doubt Miguel's strength, but... if he didn't have a team strong enough to keep him safe in Area Zero and he didn't get permission to enter it...
---
Sada's leg bounced restlessly as she sat at the table they had somehow squeezed through the narrow door of the lighthouse lab. Her eyes flicked first to the clock mounted to the wall, then to Turo, sitting motionless near side, his face a neutral mask, and then finally to Arven, who sat between them both at his high chair, happily and blissfully chewing on a teething ring. He had already destroyed two of them and looked determined to chew through his third. Nothing else moved in the room as two minutes passed. Then three. Five.


The prototype Tera Orb sat on the table in front of them, placed carefully out of the way of Arven's curious fingers.


« M-maybe I should call her. Make sure she didn't get lost.»


« We're in one of the four lighthouses erected at the four cardinal points of Paldea. It's impossible to miss the place.» Turo answered, even as she saw a single bead of sweat go down his face and disappear into the collar of his turtleneck sweater.


The familiar sound of a flying Taxi approaching - that unique cacophony of Squawkabilly chattering and metal clattering was unmistakable - made her head snap up, and she jumped towards the door. She checked her clothes one last time, even if she knew there wasn't much she could do now to remedy anything she would find, then opened the door to greet their visitor.


« Ms. Heath! Welcome!» her smile was maybe a bit too wide as she greeted the tall woman. Her appearance was as striking as the first time they had seen her; for a moment, Sada wondered if her ancestor had the same piercing, almost glowing eyes. All the pictures of the time were in black and white, so there was no way to tell.


Briar walked in, letting out a small huff, heels ticking on the pavement. Sada noticed her almost stepping on one of Arven's toys, and discreetly pushed it behind the door with her shoes as she closed the door.


« I always forget how awfully noisy those Squawkabilly rides are... Skarmory and Noctowl work so much better! Too bad neither are native to Paldea... and I suppose Skarmory would have the same problem as Corviknight... oh well. It doesn't matter.» she said, getting out of her coat.


She took one look at Arven, and her smile widened.


« So this is the Arven I've heard so much about in these months! I guess I can forgive your research slowing down if it's to take care of such a cute bab-» her voice trailed off, as her eyes landed on the Tera Orb on the floor.


For a moment, she looked unable to breathe, then moved towards the table to peer at it. Her eyes reflected in the shiny surface of the orb.


« That... is what I think it is?» she breathed out.


Sada nodded, moving back to the table and sitting back down next to Arven.


« Yes. The Tera Orb. It can hold a charge by getting exposed to a large quantity of Tera Crystal for an undefined amount of time, until it gets used to Terastal a Pokémon. After that, it needs to recharge. » Sada explained, putting one hand on the sphere. No bigger than any Poké Ball, they had designed it to look quite similar to one, so the use would be more intuitive.


« ... There also may be other uses. We've been trying to explore the possibility of using it as a power source. Things look... extremely promising. » Turo added.


Briar's eyes widened at that.


« So you are already exploring other possible uses of Tera Crystal! Fascinating... but I have to say, for now I am more amazed that you managed to recreate Terastallization at will... To wield the power of Terap- umm.» she suddenly seemed to cut herself off, like she had almost said something she didn't mean to. Sada almost leant forward, interested: what had she just said? Tera... something...


Briar sat down, pulling the chair closer.


« I suppose we should start over from the beginning. » she said.


« Around two hundred years ago, as you know, my ancestor led an expedition into Area Zero. What he saw there is documented in both the Scarlet and Violet books... but not all of it. Parts of the books have been censored in the following reprints... he kept some things for himself. » she said. Out of her shoulder bag, she took out a book and carefully laid it on the table in front of her. The cover was blank, nothing more than a simple page with a title on it.


«"The White Book"...?» Sada read, quirking one eyebrow.


« He probably hadn't thought of a title yet... this book contains the exact same info as what's transcribed in the Scarlet and Violet books, almost letter by letter... But as I'm sure you can see... he made some edits further down the line to get the two versions you know.» she said, opening the manuscript to a specific page. Sada recognised it immediately; by now, she had poured over the Scarlet Book so much she could tell what general chapter any random page of the book was in. This was the part where the exploration squadron got their first encounter with a Great Tusk (or Iron Threads in Turo's version), which had injured and killed a member of the group.


« "As we descended further into Area Zero, we began to catch glimpses of mysterious Pokémon—though we wondered if these beasts, either huge and ferocious or cruel and compact were indeed Pokémon at all"...» she read, before her mind caught on a little out of place detail.


« Wait... this has the text of both versions. So he really saw both Pokémon!» she excitedly turned towards Turo, who leaned forward to read the following paragraph in a hushed whisper.


« "These two beasts both had a passing resemblance to the Pokémon known as Donphan"... but I don't understand.» Turo shook his head, and Sada saw him furrow his eyebrows .


« Why not publish the book as it was? Wasn't splitting it in two versions just going to make it look even less realistic? Isn't that why people just discredited it as fiction?» he asked.


Sada could understand his frustration; for her, the Scarlet Book offered the fascinating, tempting possibility that in Area Zero, somehow, Pokémon from long ago had either survived until today or had been brought here. But for Turo, the Violet Book was an impossible riddle; had Heath really seen Pokémon from his far away future? Why had his people never heard of it in that case?


Briar, however, just shook her head.


« That, I'm afraid I don't know.... Nothing in the notes Heath left explains why he decided to print all he saw in two books... but what I wanted to show you was actually this. The page about the "Hidden Treasure of Area Zero". » she opened the book near the end, where one page was completely covered by an illustration that Sada knew very well. It was a pretty striking one, of a great beast that looked surrounded by crystals, floating over a great sphere. It looked a bit like some ancient myths imagined the world to look like : a brilliant disk, held on the back of a giant Pokémon.


« Heath named this... he describes it as an "entity"... "Terapagos". According to him, it's the source of both what you have named "Terastalization" and Tera energy as a whole, and the true nature of the famed "treasure" of Area Zero. The page describing it was heavily edited in the published versions. And that is what I want you two to do.» Briar said, leaning closer towards both of them and in doing so, inadvertently, towards Arven, who shied away from this random stranger.


« I'm going to gladly do my part in funding your research as much as I can if you can prove that Terapagos exists and that my ancestor was right! If I could just see it with my own eyes... the very Treasure that's captured Paldea's imagination for untold centuries!» she gasped, her eyes shining again.


« ... and drew an untold number of people to their deaths looking for it.» Turo muttered, and Sada couldn't help but throw him a sideways glare.


This wasn't the time to be snarky! This was exactly what they wanted! If Briar could fund them...


« I'm... I'm sure we could do it...» she answered, swallowing.


« Splendid! Then it's settled! I have great expectations for both of you. I've already read both of your publications! The idea that all Pokémon used to be affected by "Primal Energy", or that they could similarly adapt to new, unknown energy sources in the future... fascinating! But I admit that the Tera Orb is what I am most interested in by far.» she looked back at it, and there was a gleam in her eyes that made Sada almost want to snatch the Tera Orb away from her gaze and hide it back in her lab pocket.


« ... To be able to wield just a fraction of Terapagos's power... ah, but I suppose it would be limited to Paldea. What a shame...»


« Not necessarily.» Sada answered after a moment. Briar looked back at her, silent.


« You could, in theory, use a Tera Orb anywhere in the world.» Turo interjected, picking it up in his hand.


« Of course, you would then be stuck with a useless Orb and no way to recharge it ... unless you brought it near a large enough concentration of Tera crystals again. In that way, it's not exactly limited to Paldea, per se...»


« So if you brought enough crystals somewhere else, we could theoretically make Terastalization possible anywhere in the world! » Briar nodded.


« Crystals... and soil from Paldea. » Sada added. Probably better if both were from Area Zero, or as close to Area Zero as possible... she looked back to the depiction of Terapagos in the White Book.


Was all of this really the effect of a single Pokémon? A single living thing, hidden deep in Area Zero?


She knew from history that, apparently, many legendary Pokémon existed. Pokémon with enormous powers that controlled the very forces of nature... the very laws of reality.


In that case... what did Terapagos command, then? Time ? Could it really be the reason those Pokémon - and she and Turo themselves - had appeared in Area Zero?


« So it would be possible to reproduce Terastalization anywhere in the world, as long as you bring some Tera Crystals there! » Briar brought her hands together and nodded with enthusiasm.


« I'm getting a bit carried away... see, I've been away from Paldea for awhile. I've been busy teaching at a new institution called Blueberry Academy, in Unima.»


The name meant nothing to Sada, but she heard Turo shuffle slightly at her side, sucking in a sharp breath.


« ... I've heard. Your curriculum places heavy emphasis on teaching Pokémon batting. And?» he said in a neutral tone.


« Unlike Uvanja Academy, Blueberry was founded just a couple years ago, using the most cutting edge technology available at the moment-»


She heard Turo scoff, trying immediately to disguise it as a light cough, and she had to suppress a smile. She could picture exactly what he would say about any "cutting edge technology". Briar furrowed her eyebrows for a moment, before continuing.


« The most ambitious part of our Academy is surely the Terrarium, which is still being built: a place able to house a large number of wild Pokémon from all over the world and simulate their natural habitats. I'm sure you two would agree that it's a perfect opportunity to test reproducing Terastalization! Professor Sada, your studies about changes in climate influencing Pokémon in the past would be invaluable to help the engineers of our team design the various biomes! And you, professor Turo, Professor Clavell told me you are an incredible programmer! And your study about man made items that replicate the condition to evolve certain Pokémon... it would be invaluable in testing some theories about how certain Pokémon evolve...»


Sada couldn't help but feel a bit overwhelmed about Briar's enthusiasm.


« W-wait a minute!» she put one hand forward on the table, subconsciously between Briar and Arven.


« Let's not... get ahead of ourselves. We were discussing looking for Terapagos in the depths of Area Zero, which we still need to access... we can't also help in building up this whole new Academy-» she said.


« ... but, Professor Sada-»


Sada had to admit hearing Briar call her that felt good, even if... she didn't think that neither she nor Turo were officially recognised as "professors" yet. No one else had called her that, after all.


« That's pretty much how academic works! The more applications your research has, the easier it is to secure more funding!»


But... they were doing that by developing the Tera Orb... and other uses of Tera Energy... right?


« Of course everyone would love to dedicate themselves completely to their favourite research!» Briar laughed like the idea was completely absurd, a silly, childish notion, and Sada had to fight the stab of anger and disappointment swirling in her chest.


« But whoever puts in the money also wants some actual results!» Briar added.


... she wasn't sure she liked the idea of getting funding by her anymore, if it meant that they were practically in her debt and had to indirectly do what she wanted. She felt Turo squeeze her knee under the table and turned towards him, expecting him to share her sentiment. Instead, she saw him hold his head low, shoulders kept straight, as he simply nodded and looked up again.


« We'll see... what we can do.» he answered. Her eyes widened. What? How could he just sit there and meekly say "yes"? They needed that funding, of course, but... but...


« Splendid! I'm sure your contribution will be invaluable!» Briar smiled, before she looked at the clock. « Look at the time! I have to run to another appointment, but it was a pleasure speaking with you! And to see little Arvin here, of course...»


« Arven...» Sada corrected her, furrowing her eyebrows.


She watched Briar get up and gather the manuscript, leaving as quickly as she had arrived.


The silence that followed was broken by Arven.


« Ma-ma! Ma-ma! Hug!» he tugged at her hand, giggling. Sada blinked, looking down at the kid as she pulled him in her lap, then towards Turo.


« Why did you just agree to that? We-»


« We don't have the luxury to say "no", Sada. Our research, this very house, our Pokémon , everything... without someone willing to fund us, we've got nothing. We are nothing, here. » he smiled sadly, looking down at Arven, and she felt a little chill at his words. If it was just her, or just her and Turo, she wouldn't have cared. She would have done whatever she wanted and if people decided to cut the funding... well, she would have found something else to do. Her past life had always been like that, after all.


But they had Arven now. She couldn't do that to him.
... and she couldn't do that to Turo, either.


« I... I see. »


She felt like things had just suddenly gotten a lot more difficult. More complicated. She took a big breath, and nodded.


« So we'll have a bit more work to do than I thought. All right. Let's do it. »
---
Weeks passed between their research, new projects starting, training their Pokémon, Gym battles, and amidst all that, Turo could see Arven grow bigger and bigger. He seemed to learn new words everyday, surprising him when he suddenly blurted out something he had never heard him say before, wondering when exactly he had learned it.


And with that milestone, came Arven's first birthday.


That evening, there would be a big party on the beach near the lighthouse with Clavell, Raifort, Jacq and others.


But that morning, he and Sada had planned something a bit different.


Turo held Arven in his arms, walking across the bedroom and entering what had become the kid's room. They had decorated the room with plushies, toys, books, and a small bed, which he was still a bit too small to sleep in. On the wall, the handprints of both him and Sada and the footprints of their Pokémon were not the only decorations any more. Sada had added stylized plants and Pokémon; Turo had painted some star charts over the ceiling in silver lines. On the floor, different tin cans of paint waited.


« Now, Arven... this is really important. What color do you like?» he walked closer to one can in particular.


« Violet, right?» he whispered in a conspiratory tone removing the lid with one hand, eliciting some giggles from the kid.


« No! »


« What?! But it's the best color!» Turo smiled, planting a kiss on the kid's cheek. Arven shrieked with laughter as his beard tickled him.


« Stop trying to influence our kid's taste in colours, Romero.» Sada smiled as she walked in behind them.


« Just let him choose.»


Turo sighed and lowered Arven to the floor.


« You say that, but I bet you're also secretly hoping he picks scarlet.» he whispered back.


Judging by her pout in response, he was right.


They both waited with bated breath to see what Arven would do. The baby looked a bit unsure of what he actually had to do, but was quickly attracted to the bright colours depicted on the various tin of paint. He pointed to one, his eyes shining.


« Blue!» he exclaimed, and Turo shot a grin towards Sada. Hah! Well, it wasn't violet, but still, close enough!


« So you want this one?» he asked, crouching near him, only for the baby to immediately point to another one.


« Red... ?» he asked now, a bit confused, to which Arven giggled and pointed to another.


He was just pointing to all colours, was he?


« Maybe it's still a bit too early to ask him to choose a favourite colour...» he commented after a moment, to which Sada smiled.


« Probably, yeah. » she crouched near the baby, sitting cross-legged on the floor; Turo followed after a moment, looking at the two human handprints on the wall, where one day Arven's own handprint would join them.


But not today. There was time.
Arven tottered over and crawled on their lap, one thumb stuck in his mouth.


He looked down at his son -sometimes, it still didn't feel real-, and brushed some short hairs out of his face. He seemed to have gotten a curious mix of his and Sada's hair colour.


« Happy birthday, Arven.» he whispered, holding him close.

Spoiler: Author Note:

I really like the Pokedex entries for Stellar Form Terapagos because they sound like they could have been written by Sada and Turo themselves, lol.

"In this form, Terapagos resembles the world as the ancients saw it, and its Terastal energy is abnormally amplified. "

"An old expedition journal describes the sight of this Pokémon buried in the depths of the earth as resembling a planet floating in space. "

 

[Spiteful Murkrow]

Heya, I kinda ran out of time in Review Blitz to give this story another review, but I did have the doc with the text waiting to be marked up handy, so I felt that was as good an excuse as any to get in another chapter of this story under my belt:

Chapter 9

Spoiler: Line-by-Line

« Anyone want some Poké Puffs?»

Everyone turned to look at Ortega, who had just half poked his head into the sanity room. That day the weather had decided to be absolutely terrible: one of Paldea's infamous flash storms had hit most of the southern part of the region, and the view outside the windows in most offices of the TTDL had been of a rather depressing grey mixed with the constant drumming of raindrops on glass for a couple of days by now. By the third day, everyone who was not away on a time jump had spontaneusly gathered in the sanity room; it was cozy, warm, they kept each other company, and it was nice to look at something that wasn't rain for a bit.

TIL what a ‘DANA’ is. I wasn’t aware that sudden storms like these were a thing in Mediterranean Spain and France, cute attention to detail for your setting there. I’ll have to keep that one in mind myself.

Turo had pretty much claimed a little corner of the room that had a comfortable couch and a table to hold a drink as his own, his figure veritably obscured by a wall of screens and monitors he had opened up all around him, each showing a different article, website, or obscure book he had been digging up. They all shared the same topic: Cyclizar and what changes in the environment had sparked his its evolution (in the classical sense, not Pokémon-evolution sense) into Miraidon.

Your world’s biosphere getting trashed and forcing Pokémon to become bionic or else become extinct outside of very specific environments? I mean, when even the Cinccino wound up becoming cyberized… ^^;

His latest report about Sada's discovery (because it was hers, like he had made sure to point out in the report) of what was probably a Paleolithic era ancestor to both had sparked quite a bit of interest, and so he had spent the last couple of days reading up about Cyclizar and Miraidon. He only had the copy of Sada's drawing to go by, but even only with only that there were some details about the Proto-Miraidon that were... puzzling. Like the antennae on the top of their head they both seemed to share: Sada's drawing had given a lot of emphasis on them, while Cyclizar seemed to lack them completely. It was weird, from an evolutionary perspective, for something to lose a certain trait and then acquire it again.

Huh. I always thought of those spike things on Miraidon’s head as horns, though I suppose they do look a bit more ‘antennae’-like for Koraidon.

He was so absorbed in his reading that he had barely noticed the Ortega’s question, but the same couldn't be said for everyone else.

Given that you had a bit of a tangent since Ortega’s line, it might make sense to give an explicit reminder that that’s him speaking there.

« Which Poké Puffs are we speaking of?» came the question from Vega, who had a monitor of her own open and was busy shifting through blurry pictures she had tried to take of the legendary beasts trio.

She stopped to contemplate one in particular, which would have captured a perfect and gorgeous image of Suicune running over the waves... only for some guy in a frilly cape to have accidentally photobombed the shot, causing the Pokémon to go out of focus and be nothing more than a blurry splotch of blue in the background. She deleted the picture, irritated.

« ... this dude was everywhere while I chased Suicune, I swear-»

Lmao at that Eusine cameo there.

Ortega entered the room proper and rolled his eyes, stealing a chair - as usual- and sitting down.

« The ones from before they changed the recipe and made them smaller, obviously. I need to jump to Lumiose City in year 4679 anyway this afternoon, may as well grab some while I'm there.»

Oh, so we’re way way in the future right now in Turo’s time given that Ortega’s casually talking about time travelling to a place over two and a half millennia into the future from the ‘present day’. Duly noted.

That at least made the redhead perk up a bit.

« Oh hell yeah, get me a deluxe box of Supreme Spring ones then.»

[ ]

« Of course you go straight for the most expensive option...» the man muttered while taking notes. More orders started to come from the others in the room.

This might have made sense to give a bit of description about Ortega’s reaction to this moment here.

« I want a box of frosted mocha flavored-» that was Satoshi, the researcher from Kanto that had joined the TTLD just last month.

Oh, hello there, Ash cameo.

« One medium box of Mint flavored for me.» someone whose voice he didn't quite catch.

« - oh, and also a box of Sweet Fancy ones, you know those with the cute little chocolate squares on top?» that was Vega again.

[ ]


« You really plan to eat them all?»

« ... I would like a box of frosted orange flavored. » Turo finally raised his hand over the wall of screens, making Ortega jump a little.

Another spot where it’d make sense to drop in some description there, especially if Turo’s starting to pay attention to what’s going on again.

« Didn't even see you there... and I thought you hated orange flavored stuff?» he asked, trying to peek over the monitors. Turo flicked them away and accidentally into each other, causing a short buzz of static when the holographic projections collided to fill the room.

That’s news to me, too. Since we haven’t seen Turo interact with these fruits at all. Though I take it that this is a game version gag at Scarlet’s academy being Naranja Academy. Makes me wonder if Turo has a soft spot for grapes in that case.

« They are not for me. Miraidon loved them when we were little, and he got all sad when they stopped producing that flavor. »

Turo briefly drifted back to his memories. and Whenever Miraidon got sad, he had his own special way of looking at him with those cute pixellated puppy eyes, and damn if it didn't make him feel terrible about whatever it was that had caused them, even if it was something outside of his control. You One would think it wouldn't be possible for a Pokémon whose eyes were literal pixels to look so heartbroken, and you would be time and again, Miraidon would prove him wrong.

Some suggestions for smoothing out this section a bit.

« I'm sure he will be happy to taste them again.» he finished.

After having finishing his explanation, he buried himself in the screens again, going back to his reading and mentally tuning out Ortega and Vega that had as they started to bicker about the prices of Poké Puffs in 4679 and how much money she had to give him taking inflation into account.

Perhaps I had it backwards as to what direction Ortega was going to be jumping. Though I’m surprised that their currency would be usable at that time, since you’d think that with inflation, that the currency would’ve gotten replaced or revaluated multiple times with that much time intervening and that Ortega would be better off scraping together some couch change he knows will become collectable and pawn them off to get the money to buy the Poké Puffs that way.

Later that evening, after Ortega had come back carrying a small mountain of pastries, Turo walked back into his apartment with the small box of Poké Puffs tucked under his arm. Miraidon ran up to the door to welcome him back as always, and the Pokémon's pupils got wide widened when it seemed to smell what he was carrying. With an excited growl, the dragon got up on his hind legs and put his front paws on the man's shoulder, wagging his tail.

Oh, so Miraidon’s “dog tendencies” were around before the events of this story. I wonder if Koraidon will also have them too, or if they’ll wind up being developed through contact with Sada.

Turo just laughed, trying to avoid getting pushed to the floor. Sure, Miraidon wasn't actively weighing down on him - or he would have been sent sprawling already -, but when he got so excited it was a bit difficult for him to control his strength.

Um…



How is Turo not being knocked to the ground right now anyways? ^^;

« Calm down, calm down! Get off me, you're way too heavy to do that now... you're not a puppy anymore.»

Wouldn’t have expected a lizard to be called a ‘puppy’ (for reference, I’d have expected something like ‘hatchling’), but I suppose his behavior is close enough that if the boot fits…

Nevertheless he took a moment to stroke the Pokémon's neck and just rest his forehead against the smooth scales. Miraidon almost purred and nuzzled him with his head, then backed up to give him space, eyes notably never leaving the little box he was carrying.

Miraidon:

Turo smiled and opened the box, offering one of the Poké Puffs to the Pokémon.

« Just one for now, I can't have you gobbling them all up in one go... »

Cue Miraidon just shoving his head in the box and gobbling everything up.

He personally wasn't a fan of the smell of oranges that would no doubt permeate the kitchen in the following days, but he could endure it if it would make Miraidon that happy.

Whelp, we can confirm that Turo doesn’t use orange oil to clean his apartment given how much he reacts to anything “orange” like this, I suppose.

A ringing sound resonated through the apartment; with equal parts annoyance and anxiety, he opened a screen and took the call, watching Miraidon devour the Poké Puffs in two big bites.

I mean, at least Miraidon is actually only eating one? I was honestly expecting him to just go to town on the box.

The anxiety dimmed a bit when the caller was not the TTLD as he had feared. Just a bit, though.

« ... mom? I just got back from work. No, I didn't time travel today, next jump is in two weeks time...»

Oh, so Turo does have other family in his time. Duly noted. I wonder if we’ll get to see them at all.

Turo stopped at the voice of his mother on the other side of the line, then groaned.

« ... No, that doesn't mean I've got nothing to do until then, I do other things in the meantime, I've already told you... And no, I don't want to go to the Moon for some overpriced lunch on Sunday-»

Well, that’s definitely a sign that we’re in the distant future with how casually Turo is dropping that remark there.

It was crowded and way too touristy - mostly all people born on Mars that got all stupidly sentimental about being on "the" Moon - and it was too far for teleporters to reach, which meant that you actually had to sit down on a shuttle and suffer through three hours of horrible movies and screaming toddlers.

Wait, what is the range of their teleporters if the Moon is the first major destination that comes to mind as ‘have to travel the hard way’? Though it makes me wonder what the financial viability of setting up a teleporter relay of space stations between earth and the moon would be.

The reduced gravity was really only interesting for the first couple of times, after which it got old pretty fast, and it was not like they didn't have simulators for it on Earth anyway.

Much cheaper. Faster. Less martians that who’d accidentally elbow you in the face to take a selfie with a view of the Earth in the background. [ ]

« Can't we at least do it somewhere else? » he sat down on the couch and tried to at least change the location to meet up, to no avail.

That actually makes me wonder if the moon still exists in the same capacity as we know it, or if it’s been terraformed in Turo’s time period. Though it might make sense to show a bit of Turo’s thoughts turning back to his conversation before he speaks up again.

A couple of minutes later, he closed the call with a defeated sigh and turned to look at Miraidon, lifting one hand to rub the Pokémon's snout that still had some cream from the Poké Puffs stuck to it.

Oh, so Miraidon was helping himself to seconds while Turo wasn’t paying attention. :p

« Sorry buddy, looks like Mom had other plans for us this weekend. We'll go riding next week, I promise. Somewhere sunny.»

[ ]


« Gwaoooh.»

« You're still coming with me though. If we have to suffer, we suffer together.»

[ ]


«... gwaoh.»

A couple spots where it probably would’ve made sense to describe Miraidon’s reactions in a bit more detail than what you did there. Especially since I gather that his mood is meant to have perceptibly changed a bit

In the end, the trip had thankfully been not been too bad; no screaming toddlers this time, and he had managed to just sleep for most of it. The shuttle docked at the Moon base around 11 AM and Turo mentally prepared himself for the weird sensation of suddenly feeling much, much lighter.

Whelp, that confirms that the moon hasn’t been terraformed. Can’t tell if they just haven’t made it that far as a civilization yet, or if they just decided that looking up and seeing blue in the sky at night was going a bit too far.

It wasn't completely zero gravity, but it still felt pretty much very... "floaty" was the only way he could describe it.

Yeah, I’ll bet with ⅙ of Earth gravity there.

The Moon base was a series of interconnected structures, each built at different points in history for different purposes. Completely isolated and self sufficient with an artificial atmosphere, they were pretty much little cities of their own, and the Moon as a whole was considered its own region not unlike any other.

So do they have a Pokémon League of their own, then? /s

Just a bit more deadly if you stepped "outside" without a pressurized space suit.

Ah yes, no wandering out into the boonies to go catch Pokémon, I see.

Turo took the first bouncy step outside the shuttle, where artificial gravity was kept the same as on Earth, and almost went flying - literally-, landing five meters over where he would have landed if he had still been on Earth. The momentum was enough to send him skipping another couple of times and had him resort to windmilling both arms furiously just to finally stop. He glanced around; a couple of teenagers passed by, giggling at him while shaking their heads.

Small typo there.

See? This was why he hated the Moon. It was so weird, the micro-gravity always left him disoriented and nauseous, and he usually had to leave just as he got the hang of it, because screw spending the "night" there. Complete zero gravity was better than this.

I take it that hotel rooms on the Moon have a habit of providing thick blinds / sunshades in order to block out the sun given that a “day” is an entire earth month.

At least he had the comfort of knowing that absolutely everyone looked stupid walking on the Moon, practically Lopunny-hopping everywhere. The only way to make that look cool was the ancient footage of those first astronauts, and only because of the historical importance of it.

I now am curious as to if the moon landings back in the day had Pokémon accompanying the astronauts at all, or if it basically played out the same as real life outside the lander.

Miraidon skidded to a stop next to him in a much more dignified way, having simply tucked his legs in, adopted his Drive form and easily floated after him on his energy rings. Turo glared at the Pokémon.

« That's cheating.»

« Gyaa~» the lizard dragon managed to look pretty smug at that.

Snerk. Even if I imagine that stopping after building up speed probably gets tricky there.

« ... just let me ride.» he grumbled, mounting the dragon Pokémon and directing him to their destination.

Huh, there’s enough rideable space to do that? That must be quite a tunnel network they’ve got on the Moon there.

His parents were already waiting for him inside the restaurant. Turo dismounted Miraidon, checked that Pokémon were actually allowed inside, then entered the place. It wasn't the most luxurious place, the really expensive ones served real meat and fish instead of lab grown protein steaks. It was something of a status symbol and nothing more, to be able to say that you could afford it, and there supposedly wasn't really any difference in taste or nutritional value... not like he had ever been able to check if that was true. Or any particular desire to do so, actually.

I’ll take that as a sign that vanilla animals exist in this setting given that I remember Turo’s coworkers making a big deal out of him wearing the hides of dead Pokémon.

It was still a restaurant on one of the most touristy spots on the Moon, and so like everything else it was overpriced as hell. He found the table they were sitting at and managed to half slide, half float his way through without bumping into other people, grabbing his chair and sitting down on it with a defeated sigh. The only good thing about micro-gravity was that stuff at least would still stay down and actually stay on the ground once it stopped moving.

That actually makes me wonder if there’s also colonization on Mars in this setting, even if it’d probably be a bit more of a serious trip given that the three hours that it took him to reach the moon would translate into a roughly 73 day journey to Mars.

« I can't believe you had your first date here, of all places.» was his way of greeting his parents.

That was the whole reason they kept coming back to this place. At 54, Leandro Turo looked pretty much what his son imagined he himself would look like in some... twenty-five years give or take, just with darker hair than his father. Those had definitely come from his mother's side, who was the perfect image of the stereotypical Paldean woman; dark hair and eyes, long eyelashes and olive complexion, Carmen Ramos de Turo simply smiled and shook her head.

I actually wonder if that implies that Turo and his family aren’t of Paldean origin, since their name structures are actually noticeably different from what one would expect for a Spanish name IRL.

« It was quite romantic, actually, an- you brought... Miraidon?» she asked in seeing the Pokémon approach their table, looking a bit nervous in trying to not accidentally hit something or someone with his long tail.

« Why wouldn't I? He's family. » Turo answered, while the Pokémon happily licked both.

Carmen: “... Turo, we need to have a talk about dining etiquette at nicer restaurants.”

« ... good to see you, anyway.» he added after a moment, with a bit more warmth in his voice than usual. Even if he despised the place they had chosen to meet up, he was glad to see them again.

They exchanged pleasantries and ordered their food while catching up on what they had been doing the last couple of months.

That actually makes me wonder what sort of view they have right now, if any. Since you’d think with how touristy this place is, that there’d be a big honking view of an Earthrise or something like that.

« So... time traveling. Never would have thought to see it in my lifetime... It still sounds weird, telling everyone that my son time travels as his day job- no Mirai, down.» his father said while cutting his steak, only to be interrupted by Miraidon cautiously sniffing the plate. The Pokémon whined and sat down, head hung low. The sad puppy eyes had stopped working with his parents decades ago.

« ... it's still almost as weird for me to talk about it with someone else. » Turo answered after a moment while he sneaked a piece of meat to the dragon under the table.

It was like... talking about his job with someone outside of the TTDL, someone that knew nothing about how it worked, what they did, what it felt like... it was like almost as if two completely separated parts of his life were suddenly being forced to meet. The whole thing made him a bit uncomfortable.

Snerk. I take it that Turo’s been doing antics like these for a long time in life. Though IMO, you should axe one or the other “it was like” since it sounded a little repetitive.

[ ]

« Still, you were always talking about the future during your studies, I'm surprised you are actually traveling to the past now that you could actually go there.»

His mother's remark make him frown for a short moment, Sada's face flashing by in his mind.

« It's... ah, better to start with the past. The future is more... complicated.» he managed to come up with an excuse, which was also technically the truth. Just... not what his primary reason had been in choosing his destination.

It probably makes sense to describe a bit more of Carmen’s reaction before she speaks up again in order to shift the focus to her a bit more narratively.

He spotted Miraidon circling the table behind his parents, scooting closer on all fours while staying low to the ground, tail swishing behind him, and recognized the Pokémon's classic "I'm about to try and steal something while you're distracted" stance. He kept his expression carefully neutral, trying not to laugh.

I mean, at least he’s sticking to their table and not moving on to one of the background diners in the restaurant? Since you’d think that this would be the definition of a target-rich environment here. ^^;

« Makes sense. So many things you could mess up with knowledge from the future.» his father nods, while his mother still looked a bit unconvinced.

« But... isn't the past even more dangerous? You could end up influencing something and completely change the present.»

There was just the slightest hint of concern in her voice, and Turo was not sure if she is concerned about something happening to him, or about the fact that her son could accidentally time paradox them all out of existence.

Sure is a good thing that Turo’s been introducing massive anachronisms to paleolithic Kalos on and off for multiple months at this point, huh?

He would be a bit offended about her lack of faith in him, but.... honestly, after somehow shooting himself to the Stone Age?

She had a point.

« That is one theory about how time works, yes. That's why we have so many rules in place, just to be cautious. We don't even know if time paradoxes are actually possible, because... well... nobody wants to be the one that finds out.»

[ ]

« The truth is... there's been cases here and there that point to something different going on. » he started to explain, playing with his salad with a fork.

Turo’s explanation of how time travel works to his mom likely is long enough that it’s worth hacking up into two pieces with something in between.

« Have you ever heard about the first successful time jump?» he asked after a moment.

They both nodded.

« Of course. It was all over the news, it was a historical moment. »

« Thirty-two years ago, Jules I. Wells was the first man to successfully jump back in time by 43 minutes and come back. »

Oh, this is an H.G. Wells reference, isn’t it? Since I notice that the starting initials are both two off from ‘H.G.’ and he did write the story that popularized the term ‘time machine’.

« Yes, but... that's not everything he did.» the complete report was something that he had only read after starting his work in the TTDL.

« That morning, on his way to perform the first ever time jump with a functioning time-anchor, Wells went to his usual favourite bar to have breakfast. There he discovered that the croissants he always used to order were all sold out. So, for his first test jump, he decided on something completely innocuous: go back in time just enough to get that croissant.» there was a slight pause while he watched his parents’ reactions.

« ... I'm sure you can figure out where this is going.»

« ... oh. » they both said after a moment.

Oh, so basically, attempting to make a disturbance in the flow of time just winds up smoothing out in the end. Even if that, uh… has some worrisome implications for what will wind up happening to Sada’s tribe later.

« It was him, wasn't it?» his father asked, still blissfully unaware of the lizard right behind him that had his eyes fixed on the half steak still on his plate.

Miraidon, you’re supposed to steal small things that are easier to go unnoticed, just saying.

« Exactly. He himself had been the one to get the last croissant, and he never would have had the idea to jump back if it hadn't already happened. The cashier confirmed that he had seen him enter two times that morning and found it strange how he had asked for another croissant after the first, but didn't say anything about it. »

[ ]

« It was a stable time loop. There's probably a lot more of them just dotted around history... but you have no way of knowing if what you did in the past will result in one until... it does. Or even worse, if it is possible to accidentally break a loop... nobody knows for now, and really nobody wants to be the one to accidentally find out. »

This is another sequence that is long enough that you should consider chopping Turo’s dialogue up into two smaller parts.

And that is why they just tried to observe things.

Since just saying, I’m pretty sure you’ve been violating a lot of rules as a time observer with your crush on your paleolithic waifu, Turo.

And probably why everyone in the TTDL ended up a bit... strange, now that he thought about it. Maybe the job simply attracted a certain kind of person.

Can’t tell if that’s a sign that repeated time travel has side effects on the people jumping around, or if the TTDL’s staff had always been weird from the jump.

His father frowned slightly.

« That sounds... stressful, I wouldn't be able to... MIRAI, NO-»

Whelp, goodbye, Leandro’s steak.

Turo grinned while he watched what was left of his father's steak get snatched up by Miraidon and the Pokémon scamper out of the restaurant with his prize.

Leandro: “Turo, don’t ever bring your lizard along to these dinners again.”

A couple of days later, the current director and head researcher of the TTDL, Louis Moreau, entered his office. [ ]

« Dr. Turo, may I disturb you for a moment?»

« Y- yes! »

It probably makes sense to show a bit more of Louis’ mood coming in, since it helps set the overall mood of the scene as well.

Turo furiously dismissed the half a dozen screens he had opened and stood up almost at attention; he had been here for more than a couple of months by now, but he still felt like an absolute newbie compared to the man in front of him. The man was a legend, practically one of the founding fathers of their entire field of research: in his sixties by now, he had worked closely with Wells himself by helping develop the time-anchor that everyone still used.

Okay, yeah, Wells is totally a reference to H.G. Wells. One invented the concept of a ‘time machine’, one invented the actual functioning thing.

He, on the other hand... well, he probably wouldn't shake off the "Paleolithic era guy" nickname for the rest of his career. The man who had accidentally stumbled into the Stone Age, when he actually dreamed to see the future.

... it almost sounded like some bad joke.

Just wait until you get stuck in the aughts for the rest of your life, Turo.

« I've been reading your last couple of reports about your project... » the man starts, opening a screen of his own at eye level with a flick of his wrist and pulling up the various documents.

Turo's heart simply dropped in his stomach, and for a short moment he felt his legs tremble, threatening to just drop him to the ground, or at most back in his chair.

That's it. They must be cutting him off. Now he will tell him to find something more productive.

His first immediate thought wasn't for his job and his research; it was for Sada that would probably wait for him while sending smoke signals into the sky, day after day, wondering when he would come... he had promised to see her again, after all-

Oh, and here I was worried about the time police potentially forcing Turo to get stuck in the past. Looks like there was a more mundane potential vector all this time.

But he couldn't let his shock be visible in front of the director, he wasn't going to panic.

« Is there... is there something wrong with them?» he managed to choke out after a moment, voice kept at a carefully controlled, almost robotic monotone.

Oh, so he’s sounding like his eventual AI double there. /s

Moreau looked away from his screen to him with a look of slight surprise.

« Pardon? Oh no, absolutely nothing wrong with them! I understand that things are going pretty slowly in that time period, but there's nothing we can do about that, not with so little information about it that we can use...» he scrolled from one report to another, and Turo resumed breathing normally. He hadn't even noticed that he had been holding his breath.

So he wasn't... they weren't going to...?

Turo: “Whew. And here I was, getting all worried over nothing.”

« Me and some researchers at Uvanja Academy have been wondering about these "ancestor" Pokémon you've been mentioning in a couple of reports. » the man suddenly closed the monitor and stared straight at him, causing Turo to unconsciously freeze. Those piercing, icy blue eyes would have made anyone squirm.

« ... do you think you could catch some specimens to bring back? » he asked, clasping both hands behind his back and regarding him carefully.

It took Turo a couple of seconds to register what he had said.

« ... c-catch...? »

Like... like with a Pokémon battle, like in the VR games...?

I take it that catching Pokémon in general isn’t really done anymore in the present day given that as a grown adult, Turo’s most immediate frame of reference for this is “oh, it’s like in my videogames”.

« We will give you Master Balls to use, of course. Should be the most discrete way of doing it. »

Oh... of course. Master Balls. Those were a thing. Made sense.

Oh. Oh. He’s going to wind up building Sada’s Scarlet team this way, isn’t he? Since the Professors’ teams are all in Master Balls in the canonical games, and Sada does have a full team of six on top of the Guardian of Paradise, so…

Didn't make it any easier for his head to stop spinning at the whole idea, still caught between relief that they weren't cutting him off and complete shock.

« Is... is it safe to bring them along...? » he asked. Moreau just waved his hand.

« History isn't going to change because a single prehistoric Magikarp went missing 14'000 years ago. Wouldn't be the first time we extracted extinct wild Pokémon from the past and try to reintroduce them in the present. Or at least study why they disappeared.»

To say nothing about all the species you guys Jurassic Parked into existence since the equivalent of the 1990s to the point that there’s now stable populations in the Crown Tundra.

Tudo swallowed. [ ]

« ... what if someone sees me? »

[ ]


« Well... it's your responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen. Like everything else with our jobs. »

A couple spots where it makes sense to expand on the characters’ reactions a bit more to set the mood more explicitly.

Yes. Right. He had to be cautious. He had to do this.

... somehow.

Don’t make me go and fetch the Bubsy macro again, Turo.

The usual flash of light announced his arrival in the past, this time in a completely unfamiliar place. He had studied modern maps the day before and tried to approximate coordinates for the area Sada had pointed at, then Porygon 568 had done the rest, automatically tweaking them to make sure he didn't appear halfway inside a tree, or a rock, or the ground... or above the ground, for that matter.

In his time, the spot he had chosen was a quaint little café in the middle of Lumiose City. In Sada's time... he could still see the usual river in the distance, this time from the opposite side, but the forest looked less thick thinner here, leaving space for great fields of tall grass. Here and there, boulders and small clusters of trees dotted the landscape, but it was still much more open than what he was used to. And that made him nervous; he felt defenseless while he started to walk following what looked like a small trail that countless Pokémon (or people, for all he knew) had cut through the grass by walking.

IMO, this paragraph works better as two smaller ones. Though I now have the morbid mental image of Turo living through the equivalent of the Gates to Infinity opening cutscene after making a jump back into the past.

He was wearing the clothes Sada had made for him, but since they didn't have any pockets, he had been forced to still bring the lab coat with him. In the left-side pocket, his hand was gripping one of the six Master Balls they had given to him.

... there really was no reason to give him exactly six, it's not like there was a Box system set up in the Paleolitic, it had just been "tradition".

Okay, yeah, he’s totally catching Sada’s game team, I can already tell. Even if I kinda wish that there had been a bit more foreshadowing to there being other Paradox Pokémon beyond just Brutal Fangs and Miraidon going around back in this time.

"You should feel honored", Moreau had joked.

"Only Pokémon Professors and really special individuals get clearance for using them."

… Or Turo’s girlfriend / eventual wife, but one thing at a time, I suppose.

Turo just hoped that he didn't accidentally lose some by chucking them in the water. Or off a cliff. His aim was horrible, but he probably could use them as a last ditch defense mechanism. Tap something that was about to murderize his face like with that Proto Magikarp, and it would get caught. Problem was, that implied getting close. And doing it alone, if he didn't want to risk Sada seeing him.

This is going to lead to Turo entrusting Sada with doing this for him, isn’t it?

He nervously glanced all around to make sure he was alone, then took his hand out of his pocket and stared at the Master Ball. Those They had also received some design changes during the centuries: it was completely white with a red line all around the perimeter, but how they worked was pretty much the same. You couldn't improve perfection, after all. Just one little functionality had been added in the last couple of decades, specifically for time-traveling.

Oh, so Master Balls got reskinned to look like Premier Balls. Duly noted there.

One little button press on the side, and the whole Master Ball turned invisible. Turo shifted his grip around it for a moment, trying to get used to the feeling of touching something that he couldn't see, then switched the cloaking device off and slipped the Ball back into his pocket.

Wait, they make that as a standard option for Pokéballs in Turo’s time? Or is that exclusive to the TTDL’s gear?

He wasn't sure which option would be worse. Sada seeing him pull out another impossibly smooth and round "stone" that imprisoned Pokémon inside it, or him apparently making a Pokémon disappear into thin air by simply touching them.

I mean, just saying, there technically is precedent for magical stones that catch Pokémon from the anime…

But, well... he was in no rush. Sada always seemed to choose places that were relatively safe from Pokémon; apart from their encounter with that Magikarp (which, to be fair, had been his fault), they hadn't encountered anything else. He wasn't exactly eager to go running off alone into the tall grass, so he would take his time with this task.

Again, he’s totally going to have Sada do the hard work for him, I can already tell.

And speaking of Sada... he tried to look around, scanning the horizon for the smoke signals she had mentioned. It was early morning, so maybe she hadn't set up the fire yet...?

Turning east, he actually saw more than one signal. Three little smoke columns rose far, far into the distance, and it took him a moment to realize that they probably belonged to none other than Sada's settlement. She had pointed east on the map when explaining where she lived, after all, and he had serious doubts about there being that many villages within walking distance of each other. There simply weren't enough people.

Couple small tweaks that I’d suggest here.

It was... weird to think about. There lived Her whole world lived in that little place; her family, her friends, probably everything and everyone she had ever known. All in this little corner of the world near what would become one of the biggest metropolises on the planet millennia later, burying every trace of their existence under grass and stone and roads and labyrinthine sewers and finally concrete.

With a small frown, he turns his back to the smoke trails and walks away.

I take it that Lumiose kinda gave up on being a paradise for people and Pokémon a couple decades after whenever PLZ-A happened in this continuity, huh?

Turo didn't have to walk for long before he recognized the exact spot that Sada must have chosen. Those were some really big rocks, and really tall... they were more like giant slabs of stone, laying sideways in a triangular formation and creating three big slopes that made for a great vantage point. And right on top of one of them, there was Sada, sitting down with her back to him. Probably busy starting the campfire.

Wait, how far is this away from him, since at first I thought these stones were way off in the distance there.

He smiled and started walking a bit faster, rustling the grass all around him.

« Hey!»

That made her jump around, in a way that wasn't too different from their first meeting. That time she had grabbed the spear and pointed it at him in a second; now she had immediately recognized his voice and waved at him with both arms.

Again, a sign that you two are in wuv~ <3

She looked... excited. Well, Sada always looked excited about something, but this time she was even more excited than usual. Maybe she had discovered something else about the Proto-Miraidon?

« Turo!! Ah... come here! Quick!»

Nevermind, that wasn't just excited, she was euphoric. There's something new about her appearance, and he noticed what looked like a wooden tube hanging from her waist. What was that?

Oh, that one is new there.

It didn't look too different from one of those blowguns that people would use to hunt.

Wait, Turo has a frame of reference for this in his time? Like is this something that he knows from stories? From history books? Might be worth being a bit more explicit.

Sada didn't run up to him this time, but she looked so impatient that he forced himself to speed up a little.

« Sit here! » she pretty much forced him to sit by the fire, still grinning all the while.

He expected her to grab her notebook to show him something, but Sada took a couple of steps backwards and grasped the object at her waist. When she brings it to her mouth he finally recognized it as a crude flute carved out of wood, and is left just more perplexed.

Oh, she’s learned how to summon Koraidon with that thing, huh?

She wanted to play him something...?

« Watch. »

That is... nice, but he didn't think it would justify such a level of excitement...

Three long, piercing notes come out of the instrument, much stronger and clearer than he was expecting, giving him an involuntary jolt. He sits straighter now, waiting for Sada to keep playing, but she had already lowered the flute and was looking at the horizon.

Turo: “Um… okay? That flute was… something there.”

There's a long moment of slightly awkward silence, only the tall grass rustling around them.

... wait, that was it?

« Umm...» he tried to get up, only for a deafening roar to suddenly fill the air all around them. It's strong enough to force Turo to cover his ears and squeeze his eyes shut, and unlike anything he'd ever heard.

When he opened his eyes up again, squinting and with his ears still filled with a slight ringing noise, it's just in time to catch the sight of an enormous figure climbing the rock formation and rising up right behind Sada. Who is still turned towards him, hasn't noticed anything, and doesn't even have her spear. Why doesn't she even have her spear-?

Couple of suggestions to tweak this section a bit to make it a bit smoother.

They say that when faced with mortal danger, people evolved to respond to it with either one of two fundamental actions: fight or flight.

In retrospect, Turo kind of wants wanted to say that he fearlessly threw himself towards her to protect her, clutching the Master Ball as the only weapon he had and staring down the enormous scaled creature.

Oh, so he does the same thing that gets him killed in Violet and might very well do the same in this story. Neat call forward there.

Sadly, Turo was firmly in the group of people that developed a third alternative to the fight or flight response. The one called "freeze in panic and do nothing".

… Or, he could do that instead. ^^;

To his credit, he did at least jump up and tried to grab Sada's arm to yank her towards him, away from the figure, but to his surprise - and confused terror-, she actually moves away from him, towards the towering scaly lizard-like beast, that...

That is not... attacking... her. In fact, it's actually letting her pet it, lowering its head and letting out a suspiciously familiar sounding purr.

Turo: “Wait a minute, that purr. That’s the same one that-!”

It's... it's the Proto- Miraidon. The bipedal stance had thrown him off, since Miraidon either walked on all fours or simply floated, but it's undeniably the same creature of from Sada's drawings.

His legs failed him and Turo slumped to the ground, still trying to make sense of what he was seeing.

It’s just ancient history, you’ll get used to it after a few hours.

Sada turned towards him, one hand still petting the Pokémon, looking so proud of herself.

« Ah... ahahah-» he couldn't help letting out a short, incredulous laugh.

Why wouldn't she be proud? People in her time were still barely figuring out how to approach Growlithes without getting barked at and here she was, taming an honest-to-Arceus dragon. What could you even say to that?

“Marry me”? /s

He slowly got up and took some hesitant steps towards the two, observing the Pokémon. It was much bigger than Miraidon and bulkier. Pure, raw muscle strength compared to his counterpart's sleek and somewhat slithering figure.

Ah yes, the power of having 135 Base Attack to Miraidon’s 85.

« The name is Winged King.» Sada proudly announced by his side, making him pause and turn to look at her.

Oh, so that’s where Koraidon’s fluff name comes from in this story. That makes me wonder if Sada’s responsible for naming the other Past Paradox Pokémon as well.

« Winged... ?» was it because of the feathers? Sure, they were pretty big, but didn't look able to make him fly, and surely didn't look like wings to him. As for the second word, he had never heard it before.

I’m going to assume that that’s because Sada has never taught Turo her language’s word for ‘king’, since I was going to say, what on earth do the schools in your time teach kids these days, Turo?

... he really needed to give it a scientific name, even if just for the reports. Let's see, if Miraidon had been named after the Johtonese word for "future" when they had realized that Cyclizar would pretty much become a completely different Pokémon, then... something related to the past...?

And I see that that’s where ‘Koraidon’ originates in this story as well. Though that actually makes me wonder if all the ‘Iron’-style names for the Future Paradox Pokémon are actually Sada’s doing, since they’re very clearly done in a similar style. Also, ‘Reyalado/Ferromandra’ localization gags when?

He would have to think about it. For now, "Winged King" would work fine.

Or not. Guess that one will have to wait for Turo to get his hands on Future Google Translate.

Meanwhile, Sada has been talking softly to the Pokémon, getting it to lay back down on all fours. And then, right as he was thinking that there was no way that she could top "convinced a Dragon Pokémon that's barely had contact with humans to not kill me" in a single day, she mounted it.

Boy, these lizards will assent to just about everything for free food.

Well... okay, she actually took a little running start and then jumped on its back, hanging on the feathered crest -ouch- before managing to seat herself on the Pokémon's broad back- Winged King growling a bit and shaking his head, scattering a couple of white and blue feathers all around.

Her technique definitely needed some work, he thought suppressing a smirk; but considering that she was, maybe, one of the first humans ever to do it? Nailed it.

Koraidon: “*Oi! Watch the plumage there, lady!*”

He was still pretty amazed that the Pokémon seemed okay with it; it kept shaking its head and pawing at the ground, but when the girl didn't show any signs of letting go or jumping off, patting its neck a couple of times and whispering something that he didn't quite understand, it just huffed and then started to move its head left and right, in a series of small, jittering motions that he recognized with some amazement.

That was exactly what Miraidon did when he tried to pretend that something wasn't bothering him, feigning indifference. How many little details like that had remained unchanged, from one species to another?

That now makes me wonder if Cyclizar also behave this way when in “I’m not bothered, really” mode themselves.

Sada broke him out of his amazed trance by patting the space left behind her on the Pokémon's back.

« Come! »

Turo: “So, uh… how many times have you done this in the past again?”

For once, Turo didn't hesitate. He walked to Winged King's side, boosted himself up by pushing against the Pokémon's back legs with one boot, and swung his leg over its back to seat himself right behind the girl, lab coat swishing around behind him - and pointedly reminding him of the Master Balls tucked deep in its pocket-.

Only when she turned to look at him strangely, one hand still half raised like she had been ready to help him up, did he realize what he had done.

Umm... shit.

Wait, what did he-?

He was so used to mounting Miraidon that his body had pretty much moved on autopilot. Should he have pretended to struggle a bit?

Oh. Oh. I actually didn’t realize that, but… yeah, there’s literally zero frame of reference in Sada’s time for ‘Ride Pokémon’, so it makes sense that smoothly mounting a Pokémon would stand out like a sore thumb.

Well, it was too late now anyway.

Sada regarded him in silence for some excruciatingly long seconds, those bright, brilliant eyes narrowing and quickly scanning him up and down. Looking for some other detail she must have missed, some explanation, they stopped on his hands, his face, his legs. Turo pointedly held her gaze, feigning innocence.

«... let's go?» he offered, trying to keep his voice neutral.

Sada: “... What on earth do they teach you at that tribe of yours?”

Turo: “I… uh… got lucky there? Really, things just came together so smoothly that I wasn’t really thinking about it.”

After another long moment, she just shook her head, exasperated, and turned back around to give a command to Winged King in her usual chipper fashion.

She must have noticed something and simply decided to not speak up about it.

I mean, she probably did, but you know what they say about assuming, Turo. ^^;

Winged King growled and started to walk, walking down the natural ramp of the rock formation it had climbed just before. Sada held on to the spikes on the Pokémon's front legs, another detail that it already had in common with its descendants that amazed him, while Turo managed to kind of hang on by just tightening his grip around the Pokemon's sides with his legs, staying upright.

That… sounds like a way to get thrown off Koraidon once he breaks out into a sprint, just saying. ^^;

It wasn't that different from Miraidon, really... just a bit more rigid scales and feathers instead of smooth, metallic plates.

And then it started to sprint, and he had to immediately eat his words.

Ah yes, there’s a reaction image for this one:

He let out a little yelp of surprise at the sudden speed boost and had to scramble for some purchase, grabbing onto Sada from behind by looping his arms around her stomach, which made her jolt and gasp in surprise.

Oh yeah, I can already tell that these two are going to have beet red faces after this. >:V

Winged King was speeding up, cutting a path through the tall grass, and his only thought at the moment was pretty much "Nope, it's not similar to Miraidon at all".

Miraidon's movements were... smooth, lithe and elegant, his paws not even touching the ground while he zipped forward like a bolt of lightning blitzing through the sky. But most importantly, his old partner's movement felt... controlled. Perfectly adapted and calibrated to ride with him, reading his slightest change in body language, thanks to millennia over millennia of evolution alongside humans.

I think this is a sign that you need to take your buddy on more dirt roads, Turo. Since just saying, once you start getting into the world of motorcycle stunts, things rapidly start losing some of that precision you allude to there. :p

Winged King's movements made it clear that he was accommodating no one but himself; he could feel the pure power behind every one of the Pokémon's strides, every kick of its legs. There was no reassuring buzz of electricity filling the air, just the sound of its powerful claws tearing at the ground, its whole body moving up and down.


Winged King felt like riding a force of nature; you didn't control it, you just held on for the ride and hoped to not get thrown off.

Cue the theme song:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7ES7ueI7p0

But Sada, somehow, was managing it, leaning down to pat the Pokémon's neck and pointing in whatever direction she wanted it to go, in a series of signals she had to have developed herself.

The Pokémon seemed to take them more as suggestions than real orders, but still, it was listening to her.

Huh, wouldn’t have expected Miraidon to never go full “nice suggestion there, but lol, lmao” occasionally with Turo given how he can be a little terror in his own right from the whole moon restaurant episode. o<o

And then, after another one's of Sada's commands, the Pokémon jumped up, climbed a tree to its highest point, then jumped off it and took off.

« IT FLIES?! » he couldn't help the scream that escaped him as they rose into the air, partially covered by Sada's ecstatic laughter.

Turo: “Wow, it really is a Proto-Miraidon!”

How was it even flying? Those antennae even if extended couldn't be the only thing it was using to keep itself in the air, it didn't make any sense! Even Miraidon had to use his jet boosters to keep rising in altitude, and he floated magnetically.

Was it part flying type? Was it generating wind currents to fly??

Koraidon:

Turo: “Okay, yes, but still!”

The Pokémon flew in circles over the tree tops before slowly circling back down to the ground. It landed roughly, almost sending both humans directly pitching forward, and shook his head before growling.

Sada was the first to jump down, and she got something out of her bag that the Pokémon was quick to gobble up in a single bite.

Another egg, or…?

Turo got down a bit more slowly, still in a bit of a daze over the fact that it this bizarre creature just flew.

IMO, you should be a bit more explicit about what the ‘it’ is referring to there.

Sada regarded him with a radiant smile, the little moment of tension between them from before already forgotten - or at least, that's what he hoped.

« Did you see?! We were flying! » she breathed out.

« Yes... »

His enthusiasm must have evidently not matched hers in intensity, because she grabbed both his hands with hers, jumping up and down.

I mean, your deadpan ‘Yes’ kinda made that obvious, Turo. ^^;

« FLYING, Turo! Like birds! I can... we can... move so much faster. We can explore so much more now!»

She was talking much more excitedly now, much faster, and he missed some bits and pieces, but he still understood enough for her words to tug at his heartstrings. Of course... of course that would be the first thing she would think of...

« We can... go to your people ? » she added after a moment, looking up at him. Hopeful. Excited. Beautiful.

Turo:

His breath caught in his chest.

Yeah, I figured there.

Turo forced himself to slowly extricate his hands from hers. He lowered his eyes to the ground, he didn't want to see that excitement slowly disappear from her eyes, the light in them die and get replaced with disappointment. He slipped both hands into the lab coat's pockets, as if to hide them from her. Out of sight, out of reach.

« My people are... far, far away. [ ] »

He unconsciously gripped one of the Master Balls in his left pocket.

« We... can't go. »

I kinda wonder if it’d have made sense for Turo to emphasize his """distance""" from Sada’s people is such that “even a Pokémon can’t fly there” or something like that.

He knows that answer like these must frustrate her so much, because how can't you simply not go somewhere, but how could he even start to explain to her how impossibly far away he actually lives from her?

He simply can't, that's it.

Sada’s going to wind up piggybacking with him back to his time at some point in the very near future of this story, huh?

Sada went silent, for the first time since he's met her, she’s looking somewhat angry at him.

But mostly disappointed.

You were missing a word there in your first paragraph here.

Turo sighed, looking around, anywhere that was not her. His eyes happened to land east again. Towards her village. Her people.

« I... » he said slowly, hesitantly.

It would be risky. He would have to be careful. But... really, if she could never meet his world, getting to know her people was the least he could do. He could... document who they were. Who they had been. So that at least some trace that they had existed would be left behind. That was what his whole job was for after all, right?

Another spot where you seemed like you were missing a word here. Though yeah, Turo should be very thankful that there’s not some sort of regulatory board watching over the TTDL and his antics, since he’d be in an incomprehensible amount of hot water otherwise.

« Can I... come... to your people? »

He watched her eyes widen in surprise.

« R... really? »

He nodded, and was rewarded by the biggest smile he had ever seen on her, her whole face practically glowing - and then she jumped up and hugged him, throwing her arms around his neck, and he is left petrified with a mix of fear and excitement and oh her hair is so soft and tickling his neck and he has no idea what to do should he hug her back and not stand there like an idiot should he kiss her fuckhereallywantsto-

Ah yes, there’s our CW for swearing. I’m admittedly of two minds about this chunk of narration here. On the one hand, it’s a bit messy to read through, on the other hand, it gets into the mind of Turo with his thoughts racing pretty effectively. Perhaps try and divide things after “and then she” into two distinct sentences, with the part where Turo’s thoughts more blatantly race being in their own?

Thankfully Sada let go only a couple of seconds later -even if they felt like an eternity to him- and gently took his hand, or at least his arm.

« Let's go!»

... wait. Wait a moment.

She gently tugged him along, already starting to explain something, and he is left stumbling behind her.

... he didn't mean right now.

Too late, Turo. Time to go and meet the parents. >:V

Alright, made it to the end, so let’s just hit up the highlight reel. I honestly have been a little impressed at how long it’s taken for the shoe to wind up dropping for Turo and his antics in the past, but for what it’s worth, you seem to be building up the constantly mounting tension and his deepening feelings for Sada quite well. The worldbuilding in both the future and in the past and the clash between what’s “normal” between the two is always a lot of fun to see, as is the way that the characters bounce off each other, since there were definitely a lot of little details here and there that made me go:

Over little details from the games that seem to be being built towards in this chapter. (e.x. Turo’s assignment to use Master Balls to go and catch past Pokémon for research.) Also, the ‘dons are always precious to see whenever they show up on-screen.

In terms of criticisms, I noticed that you seemed to have more typos and wording flubs than normal in this chapter, so it probably makes sense to take some time to step through things to ferret them out. There were also some verb tense issues that kept popping up here and there. Aside from that, there were some sports where I wished you’d slowed down and described things out in a bit more detail. It’s mostly stuff relating to character reactions that go undescribed that would’ve otherwise made certain moments more interesting or funnier to see, though there were a couple moments like the lunar colony scene that I felt were a little hard to visualize in my head that would’ve benefitted from more details. There might have been more issues beyond what I noted here, but the chapter carried itself quite well, so I was probably too busy having fun to notice them.

Good stuff, @Nekodatta . And I’ll be looking forward to coming back to this story again in the future, since you’ve done a pretty good job at managing to spin an engaging story from pre-release speculation, and I’m interested in seeing where you take things. ^^

 

[Nekodatta]

Chapter 38: From Zero, part I​

In the laboratory, Turo stared with wide eyes at the little "1" denoting an unread email on his laptop. He had been staring at it for at least a couple of minutes, not daring to open it, paralyzed by the portion of the email's subject he could read.


"Your paper has been-"


"Don't be so nervous", he tried to tell himself. It wasn't like this was the first time he had had something peer reviewed, after all. He had written dozens of papers about Artificial Pokémon programming back in his time, would have written another dozens or so about time travelling if things hadn't worked out differently, and had written a couple more about certain Pokémon in this time.


So why was he feeling so nervous now? Maybe because, deep down, he knew that there was much more at stake here now. He had a son, he had responsibilities. He was a nobody here, and this was a world -renowned scientific journal that scientists the world over would read, not just a couple of guys around Paldea and Briar at best.


What if they had found out that every kind of document about him in this time was forged? What if he had written something weird that he wasn't supposed to know in this time?


He had actually asked Clavell to proofread everything before submitting it, but...


Miguel and Ampere were both by his side, the first looking impatiently between him and the screen, not understanding what was bothering him, while the second floated behind his chair. The Magnemite and his two companions had started to stick incredibly close now, and Turo realized that he wasn't really sure how the evolution into Magneton actually worked. Maybe they actually were already a Magneton now and he hadn't even realised.


Miguel cawed, impatient, and Turo nodded, slowly moving the mouse over the link.


« R-right... Let's get this over with.»


He clicked the email.
His eyes flew wide.


"Your paper has been accepted and will be published in the next number of Poké Nature"


« ... Yes. Yes! I got in! Sada!» he called out towards his wife sitting at the small table in the laboratory « I got in! We're both getting published!» he laughed, moving to hug her as she was busy feeding Arven. She laughed.


« Did you really think they would refuse your paper? » she said. Turo smiled, feeling a bit self-conscious.


« Well... I can't help but worry...»


« You worry too much. So, next week's magazine, right? » Sada smiled.


The next week, he bought the magazine in Los Platos and sat down on a bench to start browsing it until his eyes fell on his article. Next to him, Sada was doing the same with another copy as Arven sat in a stroller between them.


"Artificially influencing Pokémon evolution: ways to induce rare Pokémon evolutions in a controlled environment, by Romero Turo."


He stared at his name, feeling a strange mixture of pride and... bafflement while looking at it. That was his name, printed on a magazine that would be read all over the world.


Who knew how many other people had that same exact name across all of history... but...


He distinctly remembered asking his parents why they had picked that name for him. His mother laughed; "Your father picked it, from some famous Paldean scientist long ago with his same surname he read about in a book. He thought Romero sounded nice next to Turo"


That's what she had said. His hands trembled as he held the magazine.


He couldn't... he couldn't have picked it... because of him? Would he end up be mentioned in a book thousands of years later...?


Was he named after himself?


The absurdity of it even being a possibility made him laugh.


He turned towards Sada with a smile, only to find her similarly looking at the magazine, opened to another page. He moved closer, to find her looking at her published article about the first traces of human settlements and cooperation with Pokémon found in Paldea and Kalos. She was quiet as she brushed her finger over her printed name.


« ... I just wish I could have shown them all this. I wonder what they would think of... what I've written about us.» she whispered, and he his smile dimmed as he took a moment to put one arm around her shoulders.


« They would have been so proud of you. » he replied, to which Sada laughed briefly.


« Mother thought writing was dumb, so... I'm not so sure about that. »


Turo smiled again, remembering how nervous he had felt at meeting the fierce woman.


« ... I think she still would have been proud of you. »


Arven interrupted them by loudly grabbing at both magazines. They both looked down, almost surprised, until Sada laughed again, this time looking more relieved.


« Right... we can show him instead. » she said. « Here, Arvie, Mommy and Daddy wrote this! See?» she laughed, showing the baby the magazine. « Aww. I guess there's not enough pictures for him to care yet.»


« We'll make sure to include some brightly colored ones in our next project.» Turo mumbled in a completely serious tone, smiling at her reaction when she burst out laughing.
He sighed and leaned back on the bench, closing his eyes. He could hear the sounds of their Pokémon playing around together with Arven's laughter. The wind caressed his face as he moved one hand to look for Sada's; he found hers and wrapped his fingers around hers, holding tight. A moment later, he felt her squeeze his hand back later and smiled.
This was Paradise.
He slowly opened his eyes again, finding himself looking at the full moon, barely visible in the blue sky. The smile dimmed the tiniest bit, and he swallowed heavily.


« Let's go back home.» he offered, voice low.


A couple of days later, he received another email, this one completely unexpected. He had walked over to the small kitchen they had installed in the laboratory to make himself some coffee as the computer booted up; he still wasn't used to everything being so... incredibly... slow...and so had started doing every kind of other activity as he waited.
He quirked one eyebrow as he saw the notification and clicked to open it, having to bend forward slightly to reach the mouse as he took a sip from the mug. What he read made him almost spill the blazing coffee mug all over the keyboard in his haste to sit down, staring slack jawed at the screen.


"Your request for access to a Porygon for research purposes has been approved. Please use the following credentials to download the source code of the latest stable build-"


He had completely forgotten about it.
He thought his request had been long denied, or simply ignored!


He shakily clicked on the link and input the credentials, feeling a grin stretch on his face. A Porygon all for himself! That was adorable!


He downloaded the source code and started to read through the configuration procedure. This was... fascinating. He was used to code from a much more advanced version of Porygon, so this looked extremely bare-bones to him. Only the simplest procedures and methods had been implemented yet. It was like... a completely blank canvas. Truly the start of something new, the first true Artificial Pokémon, in its purest and simplest form.


« "Your Porygon v.1.0.34 can connect to the device where its code has been first compiled to automatically download new updates; please make sure to compile it on a device you won't lose access to-" I guess this pc should be fine...» he muttered, scrolling through various pages of instructions and terms of services.


« "Connect an empty Poké Ball to your device wirelessly to automatically register your Porygon to your Poké Ball's Trainer ID".... updating and remembering moves, sure.... "Four moves limit"... wait, what?» he scrolled back up, squinting at the screen.


The heck was a four move limit...?
It took him a long moment to realize it what it meant.
It could only use four techniques at maximum at any given time.
No more.
With most of the disk space occupied by the OS, there wasn't literally enough memory for more.
That was... kind of adorably crude.
Some poor Silph programmer had done the best they could.
Well... he was sure he could change that. If not with an official upgrade, then with his own tinkering.


After finishing setting up everything, he hovered his finger over the "Enter" key, before stopping right before pressing it. He fumbled in his labcoat pocket for his Poké Balls, letting out both Miguel and Ampere. The Murkrow yawned as he materialized on the table, while the Magneton -yes, he had confirmed with Jacq that it had actually evolved into Magneton now- scooted backwards with a slight buzz, not wanting to let its electromagnetic waves interfere with the computer. Um. Right. Maybe, for precaution, it was better if the Magneton waited outside.


« Sorry, Ampere, could you wait just outside? The new team member is a bit... delicate.» he commented. Who knew what could happen if a single byte got corrupted in a Porygon's code. Nothing that couldn't be fixed by just reverting the changes, but... he really didn't want the Porygon to experience that as its first boot up. After all, it was as if he would just be born in that moment.


... just like Arven, in a way, a new life would be born right here. That was so exciting!


He waited until the Electric type had moved out of the laboratory, then gave Miguel a small smile.


« All right, here goes.»


He pressed the button; commands flashed across the terminal and logs started to pop up.


"Importing necessary packages..
complete"
"Building Porygon OS v.1.0.34...."


Once everything was finished, the button on the Poké Ball connected wirelessly to the laptop flashed red once and shook, like it did when a capture was successfully registered. On the screen, a single line was visible.


"Build complete."


He grabbed the Poké Ball with a shaking hand, Miguel tilting his head at it, confused. He could understand the Pokémon's confusion; from his point of view, that must have been a rather unusual "capture".


He pressed the button, and released the Pokémon inside. The Porygon coalesced right next to the Murkrow, who squawked and hopped to the side, surprised.


The Porygon opened its little, pixelated eyes, and raised its head with the slightest click to look at him. Just like in the picture he had seen, it had a crude, blocky shape. Its body was just simple polygons with flat colours and no shading. It didn't even have any textures!


By its side, Miguel didn't look particularly impressed at his new teammate. He hopped forward and squinted at the Pokémon, looking apparently puzzled at what looked like a bird that had no wings.


Turo pushed the desk chair slightly back, to better look at the Porygon.


« Hello. Can you understand me?» he asked.


The Pokémon just blinked, impassive, not moving in the slightest. Turo frowned, then looked at the screen and scrolled back up at the instructions; maybe there was a specific word he had to say? A keyword it would react to? He knew that their language processing capabilities had been extremely crude at first, but he was curious to see how "basic" the commands it knew were...


« Porygon.» he tried again, and this time the Pokémon reacted, perking up. « How do you feel?»


There was a slight pause, then the Pokémon gave an affirmative beep, eyes flashing green. Umm, so... it couldn't talk?
Miguel clacked its beak, and the Porygon turned to look at the Murkrow. When the dark type tilted his head, it tried to copy him after a moment, and Turo had to stop himself from nerding out too much from the adorableness.
Look at him! He was already learning!


Turo slowly moved one hand towards the artificial Pokémon and tried to pet it. It simply stared at his hand blankly, not knowing what to do or react. Man, they really had programmed it with literally only the most basic of functions, didn't they? They had focused on those first, and everything else had come little by little in the many, many, following updates.


« Aw, you really are like a little baby bird... »


Miguel cawed again and seemed to roll his eyes, then hopped forward and playfully pecked at his fingers. The Murkrow then turned towards the artificial bird, almost expectantly. Slowly, the Porygon moved to copy the dark type, bumping Turo's hand with its hard beak, before letting out another little electronic chirp. Miguel nodded, satisfied.


Turo couldn't help a smile as he looked between the two Pokémon, complete opposites yet somewhat similar.


« I need to find you a name... » he mumbled.


Most probably something that referenced computers... some famous inventor of the past...? He suddenly realized that there weren't exactly that many people he could choose from, computers being relatively new in this time. Just like time travel had been in his era, there were right now maybe a handful of relevant names. He groaned, annoyed.


« With all respect to the guy, I'm not calling you "Bill"... this is more complicated than I thought... »


---


Sada took a big breath to calm herself down. When she and Turo had been called to the Paldea League headquarters this morning, she had to admit that she had expected something different.
Something like... a Pokémon battle, similar to a Gym challenge, but more difficult. Other regions had the Elite Four, and you were supposed to defeat them and the Champion all in a row to prove you were worth of the title of new Champion, so she had expected something similar.
Instead, she had been called into a pristine white room, with no sign of a Pokémon ring. Or any Pokémon, for that matter. The only furniture in the room where a desk, two chairs, and an old computer, and she immediately tensed up in realizing that what awaited her was even worse than the battle gauntlet she had been expecting.


This was an interview.
She groaned mentally as she sat down on one chair, and winced when it squeaked loudly. She looked down, her hands balled up into fists on her knees. She had absolutely no idea what they would ask her about. Did she need to prove her theoretical knowledge about Pokémon? But she already did that at the Academy, they could just look at her grades to see she had aced those tests...
She huffed and nodded to herself, her hands relaxing.


She had gotten through far worse; her first couple days in this time, she had gotten through keeping her true identity hidden while barely understanding the language. She had survived in harsh conditions against wild Pokémon much more savage than anything that lived in this time, with no fancy Poke Ball or items available.


She would answer whatever they would ask of her without problems.


... she still would have preferred to simply have to fight four random guys she had never seen before and be done with it. She wished she could at least keep her Pokémon with her, but they had forbidden her to do so. Sada had no idea why. Were they afraid they would somehow give her the answers?


The door opposite from her opened, and out walked a woman whose age Sada couldn't quite identify.
Quite tall, she had a mane of long, black hair - even longer than hers, actually -, with some golden and blue stripes running along it. Her eyes were of a similar dark blue color, with a bit of gold at the very center of the iris, all around the pupil. It gave her quite a striking look, like there was a warm glow deep in her eyes.
At a first glance, she looked like she was more or less the same age as her or Raifort, yet she carried herself with a security that reminded her of her own mother. She emanated the kind of aura that only people with authority and experience given by reaching a certain age or position possessed.


« Good morning. I'm Geeta Castilla, chairwoman of the Paldean Pokémon League and of Uvanja Academy's school board. I've been appointed just recently, so...» she cracked a little smile. « I've been thinking of changing how the League is handled here in Paldea. I'm going to ask you some questions, then I will do the same to Turo. Is that all right with you?»


« Yes » she answered as she tried to hide her perplexity. This sounded more and more like she was going to interrogate her and Turo separately and double check their answers.
« If I can ask... why did you ask me to come inside first?» she added after a moment.


Geeta took a moment to glance at the monitor and clicked the mouse a couple of times. Was she checking some info about them? She remembered Clavell telling them that he had to tell a couple of other people from the Academy board that he had found them in Area Zero. Was she one of them?


« Oh, simply alphabetical order. » she answered with a small shrug, before turning completely towards her. Her smile disappeared, leaving a completely unreadable expression in its place. She could have rivalled Turo's own impassible poker face, and Sada kinda wished she could see the interview he would have with her later just to witness the ultimate staring contest that would take place between the two.


« The purpose of this interview is to judge if you have the necessary requisites to hold the title of "Champion ranked" trainer. Long ago, at the time of the Paldean Emperor, "Champion" was the title reserved to his personal guards and councillors. They were not only warriors unmatched in their ability with Pokémon, but also scientists, artists, philosophers, doctors, teachers... they represented the very best that the whole Empire had to offer.» Geeta's voice rose slowly.


« That is why in Paldea, the League and the Academy have always worked together, and why so many of the Gym Leaders and Elite Four in our region seem to devote less time to their duties compared to other regions like Galar. »
Sada had heard of the Empire's Champions during history class, but she still found Geeta explanation fascinating; it resonated with her deeply. An Elite Four in Paldea was not just an Elite Four. They were an Elite Four because they also showed incredible talent in other fields in addition to Pokémon battling. It was just like in her tribe where everyone was expected to contribute with the thing they could do best, just on a region-wide scale. She found herself leaning forward unconsciously, her eyes shining.
« If you pass this interview, we'll continue with the practical part of the exam, which will consist in a Pokémon battle. Ready?»


Sada nodded.


Geeta smiled and turned completely towards her.


« Great. Now, how did you arrive here this morning?» she asked.


Sada blinked, a bit surprised by the random question. Was it supposed to test if she was truthful? Or had payed attention?


« By Flying Taxi.»


« Good. What was Artazon's Gym Challenge?» Geeda swiftly went to the next question.


« Pushing a giant inflatable olive towards a goal while avoiding traps set up by Bug Pokémon.» it had been almost two years ago by now, but she still remembered it clearly... mostly because she had laughed herself silly watching Turo do it.


« What was the last Pokémon used by Montenevera's Gym Leader?»


« A Garganacl.»


It went on like this for a good ten minutes, Geeta asking questions about the Gym challenge she had taken across Paldea: where a specific Gym was located, what the Gym challenge was, even details about what Pokémon each Gym Leader had used.


Now and then, Geeta glanced briefly at the screen to confirm her answers, and Sada had to be somewhat impressed: did they really record every single match to possibly double check info later?


« Just a couple more questions: who was your favourite Gym Leader?» Geeta asked.


Sada answered without hesitation.


« ... Larry.»


They wouldn't have invited the guy to their wedding otherwise. And the restaurant where he held his battles had quickly become a favourite of hers...


Geeta blinked, the only change of expression until now.


« ... we get that a lot, for some reason. » she muttered, and typed something on the computer. She straightened up, and her eyes now glared at Sada behind her propped up fingers.


« Why do you want to become a Champion?»


Sada now found herself hesitating. Was it some kind of trick question? Were they testing if she was going to answer honestly? Didn't she already know about her and Turo's intention to get back into Area Zero? Would they get offended and think they didn't actually care about the title itself at all? (Which was... admittedly the truth, to be honest-)


Geeta's expression was unreadable; Sada decided to be honest.


« To prove that I'm capable enough to enter Area Zero without any risk and continue my research on Terastal energy there.»


There was a long moment of silence, and Sada clenched her fists waiting for any kind of reaction from Geeta. After another couple of excruciating seconds, the woman smiled.


« ... I see. Very well. I wasn't exactly expecting to hear that you wanted to be "the very best"... we're both not teenagers anymore, after all. »


The dark haired woman clicked something on the computer and the door behind her slid open.


« You can procede with the practical evaluation. » she said as she stood up. Sada copied her movements, trying to keep her excitement down. She grasped Kim's Poké Ball at her belt. She could do this... she knew that the Pyroar, Golett, and Piloswine were strong, and had faith in them.


She took a deep breath, and entered the room to face her first challenger. She had to blink when she saw who it was, surprised.


« W- Larry?»


---


In the end, they hadn't quite managed to win; three Pokémon against five consecutive battles had been a bit too much to handle. But then again... wild Pokémon didn't fight like trained ones.
A wild Pokémon would try to flee, or prioritize not getting hurt as much as possible instead of fighting to complete exhaustion like a trained Pokémon that could quickly recover in a Pokémon Center could. Or at least, that was what Sada had told him, and since Geeta had still approved their request in the end, Turo supposed she was right.


The permissions had been granted with some conditions, however. They would try and make their way to the deepest parts of Area Zero as long as they kept near the three Research Station that had been established in the upper part of the Crater.


That morning, he, Sada and Clavell were standing in front of one of the few spots in all of Paldea that gave access to the Great Crater, the Zero Gate. There were apparently some caves here and there along the crater that would lead directly to the edge and the long, long drop to the ground over that, and all of them had been shut off with gates to avoid people accidentally wandering off in them.


However, they weren't exactly sturdy, which was why Turo wondered, not for the first time, how many people had actually tried to sneak over them. Not that it would do them any good: the only way inside the crater was still that incredibly sharp drop.


He also couldn't help but think that all that work challenging every single gym in Paldea had been only for getting the authorisation to, basically, jump into a really big hole.


« So this is the Zero Gate... » he said in a low voice. The building was pretty much hanging over the crater, with big, reinforced glass windows used to try and peer across the thick clouds that seemed to cover it permanently.


Those clouds never parted, no matter the weather in the rest of Paldea. Professor Olim's theory had apparently been that the unique shape of the crater was partially responsible for it.


They walked over the ramp that led to the platform until they stood in front of the sturdy, sealed gate.


He traded one look with Sada; for once, it was her expression that was unreadable.


« Arven will be fine. » they had left him with Raifort and Jacq at the lighthouse for a couple of hours, and this was usually the time the baby slept anyway. Sada smiled and shook her head.


« Oh... yes, I know. It's just strange to be here. »


He wasn't convinced it was just that, but let the matter drop as they opened the door and walked in.


It was immediately clear that those doors hadn't been opened in a long while. The lights flickered on a good five seconds after he pressed the switch; the entrance was a large room that was probably used to store equipment that needed to be shipped into the crater, while more doors to the left and right seemed to lead to a small laboratory and living quarters for researchers stationed here.


« So... Professor Olim commissioned this place... and spent some time here.» Sada said slowly, and Turo realized that was probably what had preoccupied her. If this Olim was really supposed to be Sada after managing to travel back to the past...


« You're thinking about why you would go back a couple decades if we are going to study Area Zero now anyway, right?» he asked in a low voice and Sada nodded, a troubled look on her face.


« Yes, I... I don't get it.. It's just... what, not even a century ago? I don't care about that. This time or a hundred years earlier are basically the same for me... Yes, even with the internet, Turo. » Sada immediately added when he couldn't help to raise one eyebrow at her answer.


« I would go much further back, if I really could... and especially now, with.... Arven and everything. I don't see any reason why I would even go there.»


Turo noticed Clavell had stopped examining a row of bookcases and turned towards them, lips slightly twisted in a frown.


« Why are you so convinced it has to be you? You both have this bad habit of fixating on a single answer disregarding any other possibility-» the man sighed, shaking his head.


« And we're both often right! What else can it be?» Sada shot back.


Turo opened the door that lead to a small bedroom. It looked very similar to Research Station 1; two bunk beds, a small cabinet, and a window that looked down towards the crater. Staring out of it made his skin crawl; he had never had a fear of heights, but something about looking straight down into the sheer drop towards nothing but white clouds made his stomach drop with a mixture of fear and excitement. Even if he knew the floor was perfectly straight, it almost felt like it was now slanting forward, ready to make him slip and fall towards the window.
If that reinforced glass ever broke or the window opened -
With a sharp breath, he stepped away from the window and closed the door behind him, his heart pounding. He didn't look forward to sleeping here at all. Judging by how the place looked like it had never been used, neither did whoever had been stationed here before.
He went back into the main hall to find Clavell and Sada still discussing Professor Olim.


« But Clavell... that's the thing. I don't have any ancestors in that time that could look identical to me, no matter how "common" you say it is for genes to be that strong.» Sada rolled her eyes as she went to examine the small laboratory instead.


Clavell followed her, deep in thought, and so did Turo. The older man seemed determined to find another explanation.


« Did you have any siblings? Relatives?» he tried.


Sada sighed, then paused. Her lips thinned, and Turo had to guess it had been because of Clavell using the past tense.


« Not in my tribe. I guess... father had some siblings in his tribe.» she said, crossing her arms to her chest.
« I suppose I could have had some cousins on his side... But you're not really suggesting that my cousins had descendants that would end looking that similar to me thousands and thousands of years later? » she said.


Clavell simply shrugged.


« The easiest explanation is often the most probable one. In this case, a coincidence looks more probable to me than you randomly deciding to hang out a couple centuries in the past for no reason.»


« ... yes, but... What about Golurk? Olim also has one! Ötzi hasn't evolved yet, but...»


« Coincidence. » Clavell repeated, unperturbed.


« Unless... The reason is exactly this place.» Turo slowly said, making both turn towards him with a slight frown. Sada blinked, just once, before her mind caught up with his, and he smiled. Of course she would immediately get it-


« Professor Olim oversaw the construction of Research Station 1, 2, and the Zero Gate. Without this infrastructure, there would be no radio, and without the radio-» she said.


« ... You two would have never escaped Area Zero alive.» Clavell finished for the both of them. He took a long breath, sighed, and took a moment to fix his glasses.


« And Professor Olim "vanished" mysteriously without a trace after just a couple years in Paldea. » Turo continued, his mind now trying to make every piece of the puzzle fit.


« Of course, it's because you come back here-»


« So you're just going to leave your husband and son to spend a couple years in the past?»


Clavell's snarl made Turo's smile melt from his face. He stopped and furrowed his eyebrows, turning towards Clavell to find him staring at both of them with his arms crossed. Behind his round glasses, his blue eyes peered at them, making him uncomfortable.


Turo turned to Sada, who looked mortified, eyes low.


« That's... that's the only thing that doesn't fit in this theory. Unless... we all go...?» she added after a moment, looking back up with her eyes shining with enthusiasm.


« Maybe Turo is the "unknown artist" that makes that painting and we're actually there, all three of us-»


Clavell bristled at that.


« You can't seriously be suggesting... it's just a stupid coincidence!» he was almost shouting now. Almost, because Turo had never actually heard Clavell raise his voice. But he was getting dangerously close.


Turo stepped between the two.


« Look, let's just... drop the topic. We know too little about what's going on. We don't even know what's truly in Area Zero... let's worry about it when we get there.»


Clavell stared at him for a long moment.


« But you also think that painting is her, do you? » he said.


Turo lowered his eyes, guilty. He did... it just made sense in his mind. It had been his first thought, after all. Except for the part where there seemed to be no trace of him and Arven in the past...


« .... let's talk about it another time.» he said.


Clavell just shook his head.


Desperately looking for something else to distract everyone from that conversation, Turo looked back towards the reinforced windows.


« How are we even supposed to get under there? » he asked. There seemed to be a mechanism for a landing pad of sort to open up in the building, overlooking the crater. He activated it, watching as the big steel doors slowly moved out of the way, revealing a platform. It was barely large enough to hold the three of them and maybe a couple middle or one large sized Pokémon standing side by side. The wind roared in their faces, and he stumbled back, closing the bulkhead again.


« Me and Sada don't even have Flying types big enough to carry us-» he said, forcing past the lump in his throat when his thoughts immediately went to Mirai. On his back, gliding into and out of the crater would be so easy...


Clavell sighed.


« Flying Taxis can get clearance to land in Area Zero for emergencies. » he explained. « You need an experienced pilot, but it's doable. »


Sada seemed to perk up a bit at that.


« I think I know just the right guy...»


« We can't use a Flying Taxi if we're going to constantly go in and out though. » Turo lamented with a groan. « Especially with all the equipment and resources we'll need to ferry down there...» he trailed off, a hint of frustration showing in his voice.


This was all going to be so unbearably slow, and he couldn't stand it.


« I can't believe you seriously have no teleporters set up in this time yet... » he growled, turning around just to find Clavell staring at him.


« Well... some places do have short range teleporters set up, but they are still in development... and require an enormous amount of energy so they are quite inefficient...»


Right. Of course. Stupid energy requirements. That had been the first reason the discovery of Hadron Energy had been so revolutionary, leading to his time. Things that had been pure sci-fi speculation because of how much energy they required had suddenly become accessible. Things like space travel, teleportation,or time travel.


But here... he just had to make do with what he had.


« ... I see. Guess we'll have to do everything the good, old manual way then. Maybe once Ötzi evolves he can help us carry more stuff in and out.» he mumbled, hoping that the mention of the Golett wouldn't spawn another discussion about Professor Olim having the exact same Pokémon.


He turned away from the bulkhead that seemed to almost taunt him silently, once again hiding the Great Crater of Paldea from view.

Spoiler: Author Note:

So at first I wanted Turo to make a little reference to Alan Turing by naming his Porygon "Turing", but I immediately realized what a horrible idea that was as soon as I thought about having to write stuff like "Turo ordered Turing". The plan was then to name it Alan, but Ampere already has a name that starts with A and I want to avoid names that sound too similar. I'm still brainstorming some nerdy name he would choose, same thing for Sada's Swinub/now Piloswine. Suggestions are welcome!

 

[Spiteful Murkrow]

Heya, ran a little late with this one, but I happened to get rolled your fics for Catnip, so I figured that it was as good an occasion as any to jump right back in for a bit more Timeslip:

Chapter 10

Spoiler: Line-by-Line

Sada observed watched as Winged King lazily slept sprawled over the grass. It seemed to prefer sunny spots to soak up the light, fanning open the feathers all over its body. Sometimes its head or tail would twitch a bit, and it would open its mouth to hiss slightly before turning around and going back to sleep.

Maybe it was dreaming? Did creatures even dream like people? By now it was comfortable enough to even sleep around her, and it would often follow her around while she moved, but still did mostly its own thing. It hadn't followed her to the village yet, but she had seen it fly around high in the sky.

Did it mean that even if it was so strong, it was wary of people in large groups?

Couple tweaks that I’d suggest for this opening section, the biggest issue is that your first paragraph is particularly long and idea-dense. It might work better split into two smaller paragraphs.

She kind of wanted to bring it to the settlement with her... It would eat a lot of food, but to have something so formidable on their side... It would make hunting and fighting creatures so much easier.

And, if she could just manage one thing, it would make travelling also so much easier.

Wait, what is the ‘one thing’ there? Is there a reason why you’re not just openly stating what it is?

Sada wanted to ride it... Which was crazy, of course. Narjik loved to tell old stories of their ancestors that fought against monsters and evil spirits by riding on some creature, fighting together, but those were just... fantasies. The kind of stories you told to entertain children or that the hunters loved to come up with after drinking a bit too much fiery berry juice late at night and nothing more, wildly exaggerating old hunting experiences.

Huh, I find it interesting that even though Sada comes from a culture where it’s just taken for granted that there’s spirits that do things, that there are some things that are firmly in “no, that’s ridiculous” territory for her.

"And then my great great grandfather totally jumped on that Roaring Moon and it helped him kill that Great Tusk! It was the biggest there ever was, you could carve a hundred spears out of its tusks and its skin was so big they made entire tents out of it for everyone!"

Stuff like that.

And we have our casual confirmation that the other Paradox ‘mons exist in Sada’s time. Though who’s telling this story right now? Chalco? :V

But... If she could actually do it... [ ] The problem was... How?

IMO, it might make sense to elaborate on the “if she could actually do it” even if it’s something as simple as “those fantasies could become actual realities” or something like that.

She walked up to the dragon; there was a spot right on its back where there were neither spikes or feathers, that seemed just perfect for sitting on its back... Taking advantage of the fact that it was much lower to the ground at the moment, she decided to simply try climbing on it.

Sada had barely gotten one leg over the creature's back when Winged King woke up, jumping upright with a growl and sending her falling back to the ground, landing hard on her back. It took her barely a moment to catch her breath, her body moving on reflex and rolling to the side when the dragon's great shadow covered her, and another moment to right herself in a low crouch, staring down (or, to be exact, up) at the creature.

Yeah, I can see why Sada was just dropping her jaw at seeing Turo casually mount Koraidon last chapter.

Koraidon: “Seriously, what is your problem?”

It had simply turned to look at her, orange eyes looking almost offended at what she had tried to do; her instincts were still telling her to get ready to fight or to run, to grab a weapon, a berry, anything, but Sada forced herself to remain calm.

Winged King wouldn't hurt her. It hadn't done so the past days and it wouldn't start now. She was sure of it, she wanted it to be true.

Sada: “Also, I’d assume that I’m right since if not, this is going to be a really short story.” ^^;

She was proven right when the creature simply snorted and walked away a couple steps, plopping back down on the grass to resume sleeping.

Sada slowly got back up, grinning. Did it really think that she would give up so easily?

I mean, if nothing else, you can’t say that’s not on-brand for both Sada and Turo in general as characters canonically.

She tried to approach the creature from many different angles after that: from the side (it simply leapt away from her, with a strange throaty hiss that she could swear was its version of laughing at her), sneaking up on it from behind (it only managed to teach it to use its tail to playfully swipe at her legs), and finally from above.

She crept along the branch of the tree she had climbed, staring at Winged King dozing off right underneath her. Curled up like it was, it was almost a perfect target to land on. Sada waited for the little signs that it had fallen into a deeper sleep: the feathered crest lowering until it laid flat on its head and the chest rising and falling at a slower rhythm, before springing into action.

Leaping down from the branch, she landed right on the dragon's back. Before it could wake up completely and send her flying again, she pressed both legs against its side and desperately grabbed for something to hold on to, namely the feathered crest.

This paragraph feels a bit long and unwieldy in its present form. The first part in particular it might make sense to play around with formatting a bit such that the list with stuff in parens is formatted into a series of short sentences with the contents outside of parens.

« Gyaaa-»

The creature started to buck wildly, trying to shake her off. The feathered tendrils she was gripping were literally vibrating in her hand, and Sada realized that the creature was trying to unfurl them like she had seen it do to fly away.

Just saying, I’m pretty sure that this is likely wearing Koraidon’s patience thin, Sada.

One of them snapped open under her grasp and almost whipped her in the face, the girl only managing to avoid it by ducking her head on pure reflex. With her hand now empty, she immediately looked for a new handhold to grab on to. Her eyes fell on a curved blue spike that grew from the creature's front leg, and she held on to it while the single opened wing flapped wildly, the creature still trashing and shaking its head.

Ah yes, so she’s stumbled across Koraidon’s “handles”. Time to see how naturally or not it responds to those getting tugged.

After a moment of consideration, she quickly grabbed the opposite spike, freeing both wings. Winged King immediately jumped up, flapping both wings as wide as possible with a smaller "gyaa-".

Had she... Had she been hurting it by grabbing them like that...? It definitely looked like it was much calmer now that she wasn't grabbing its head directly, but it still growled and tried to shake her off, to little effect. Sada realized that she was probably in the most secure spot possible: it couldn't touch its own back in any way, unless it started to throw itself on the ground, or smash his own back against a rock.

Cue Koraidon just stopping and rolling over in 5 seconds.

It thankfully didn't seem to have hit on that idea yet, and Sada had no intention to let it think too much about it.

« If you let me stay up here, I'll give you some tasty food...» she whispered, caressing its neck.

That seemed to get the creature's attention: it had learned really fast what the word "food" meant, mostly by her grumbling about it while it showed up at her camp to devour all her supplies the past few days. It went completely still, dropping back to the ground with a heavy thump and trying to turn around to look at her.

« Gya?»

Koraidon: “So… food? You do have something for me, right?”

« Yes, "gyaaa"»

She kept petting the creature, both because it seemed to genuinely like it and to distract it from the fact that she was still stubbornly seated on its back. Winged King started to slowly pace around, and Sada tried to get used to the weird feeling. It was simply walking, but... She was... actually doing it! She was riding it! Like in Narjik's stories!

Sada: “Oh boy, I can’t wait to see everyone’s faces when I show up like this!”

Ooh, the look on his face if she would actually show up to the village riding Winked King! Nevermind him, the look on everyone's face! What would Turo's reaction be?!

She threw her head back and laughed, delighted.

Yeah, I figured. Though I suppose that this is confirmation that this scene is set prior to the events of the last chapter where Turo took his own turn leading Koraidon around.

The next day, she called Winged King with her bag completely packed with supplies from the village. She had made sure to pick all the things that Winged King had seemed to enjoy eating more.

Sada had been walking back and forth from the settlement to the place where she would meet up with Turo again in a couple of days, where three great flat rocks protruded from the tall grass. The red lizard arrived swiftly, already sniffing the air while eyeing her bag.

I’ll just take that as a confirmation, though at this rate, is Sada going to have a bag left at this rate? Or is it going to become a burrito for Koraidon?

She made sure to keep it closed while she got up on its back, the creature immediately growing a bit displeased at it.

« All right, if you want some food...» she opened up her bag, took one strip of dried meat in her hand, and threw it a good couple of meters forward.

« Go get it!»

Ah yes, she’s learned to play fetch with Koraidon. A part of me wonders if it would’ve been fun to see her figure out that Koraidon would do this for the first time, but I suppose Sada is the sort of personality who would connect dots together from observations pretty quickly.

Winged King's head snapped forward, its eyes following the arc made by the morsel of food before bolting after it, Sada barely managing to hold on. With two great leaps and one final jump, the lizard caught it in midair before it could even touch the ground; it flapped its wings a single time and landed heavily on all fours, licking its lips with a satisfied growl.

Just like she had hoped, it had been so focused on the food that it hadn't cared about her riding it in the slightest.

I kinda feel like the last sentence here works better off in its own paragraph for emphasis, but that’s just me.

« Gyaa-!»

« Good job!» she leaned forward to pat its neck, overjoyed, and it purred.

The bike dragons purr? Going with the “dragons are cats” angle pretty firmly, I see.

Yes! Good! This was working... If she could get it to associate letting her ride with getting treats, she could teach it pretty much anything!

Wait, she has a frame of reference for that even being possible? Was there a moment where Fluffyhead was getting taught learned behavior that I’m forgetting? If not, it might have been worth slotting one in (or else playing up Sada’s realization that she’s already taught Koraidon learned behaviors) to give more background for this.

It would quite literally eat a hole in their supplies of food, but if she managed to get Winged King's help during hunting expeditions... The problem would just solve itself. It could probably fight anything without too many problems.

Well, until it starts running into other bike dragons. But I’ll heavily take the under on that being the case in your own time.

« Let's try this now...» she got another piece of meat out and held it up high. Somehow, Winged King seemed to sense that she was holding something in her hand even without being able to see her, trying to twist around to get a look at it. That was interesting... Did it notice that she wasn't holding the spikes on its legs with both hands? Had it noticed the sound of her bag rustling open? That had to be it.

Also, it probably can smell that the meat is behind its head, just saying.

It was much more smart than what she first thought if that was the case. That just made her even more excited about it: was it a special case? Or was it possible that all creatures were actually that intelligent?

Or at least that seems to be the tack that this story is taking in how it deals with Pokémon.

« Go!»

The lizard's head immediately snapped forward again, expecting to see another piece of food fly through the air, only to growl with disappointment when it realized that she hadn't thrown anything yet.

Looks like you might have taught Koraidon to associate food with carrying you around a little too well, Sada.

« No, not yet... "Go"» she repeated, but it stubbornly dug its claws into the ground, refusing to move.

« Gya!»

[ ] She pouted, but she couldn't just let him have it if she wanted to train it.

Maybe it was better to change tactics for now.

Small tweak I’d suggest there. I kinda feel like there’s something missing in your third paragraph but I was having trouble putting my finger on it. Maybe it’d make sense to describe a bit more of Koraidon’s reaction if it’s getting particularly stubborn?

« Go left!» she exclaimed, throwing the piece of meat in that direction. It immediately turned around to run after it, again catching it in midair. She kept doing it for quite a bit until her bag was almost empty, changing directions and making sure to praise it after every successful attempt; she was starting to get used to switching quickly from throwing the food to keeping her grip on the creature's back.

Just saying, Sada. I’m pretty sure that you’re making your life more difficult for when it comes time to try and teach Koraidon how to into delayed gratification for moving around.

Winged King, she noticed, also seemed to have quickly realized what was going on; it really was quite smart. It would turn its head this way and that, trying to anticipate her command, and before long it had started to change direction as soon as she had started to speak, already recognizing the two different words for left and right.

It was a very... rough way of moving around, leaping from spot to spot through the tall grass and constantly starting and stopping, but somehow, it was working.

Another spot where IMO, it’d be worth splitting a paragraph into two smaller ones such that a later part has a bit more emphasis.

Eventually, she hoped that it would listen to her even without the immediate promise of food. With how smart it seemed to be, maybe it wouldn't take that long.

I dunno, with the way you keep teaching it to immediately expect food after each command, Sada…

Finally, the morning where she would meet up with Turo again arrived; she literally couldn't wait to see his reaction to Winged King, and had set off from the village to reach the designated spot to set up the smoke signal.

The elevated position also had a second purpose: she was... quite curious to see from which direction Turo would come from. Logically, unless he had stealthily moved around quite a bit these days (and this was Turo: the man looked ready to collapse in exhaustion after walking up a small hill), he should be arriving from the west relative to her position...unless he had used his more... "Flashy" method of travelling.

Another paragraph where it might be worth breaking things up. Though I see that we’re going to see that scene from last chapter from a perspective flip.

Along the way, she gathered some materials to light a fire.

After reaching the meeting spot, Sada spent a bit of time looking around, searching for Winged King. She hoped that it hadn't chosen this one in particular as the day to roam farther than usual; she couldn't find traces of the lizard in the sky, but maybe it was sleeping somewhere in the grass.

I mean, you could always just blow that flute and find out for yourself. Even if canonically you don’t do that until Turo rolls up.

She set her weapon and supplies down and dug into her satchel, looking for the two flints she remembered she had packed inside to start the fire.

« Hey!»

The voice came not long after that, surprisingly, from behind her. She jumped up, startled, and turned around, and sure enough her eyes landed on Turo's figure walking through one of the narrow trails in the tall grass. Her surprise -Why was he coming from the direction of the settlement?!

-Her surprise didn't last long, soon changing into excitement. There he was! He was finally back! Oh, she couldn't wait to see his reaction! These ten days had seemed longer than usual with how much had happened in them, and she realized that she had kind of missed him. He was also wearing the clothes she had made for him, even if still with his usual white cape covering it, left hand hidden from view inside it.

A couple wording and formatting tweak suggestions for your last paragraph in this block here.

She waved at him with both arms, impatiently waiting for him to reach her.

« Turo!! Ah... come here! Quick!» Sada hurried him along and he complied with a small smile, trying not to slip on the rocky surface. As soon as he was near, she took his arm by the elbow and pretty much forced him to sit by the fire she had just lit. Turo looked slightly surprised at that - but not displeased. -, His eyes quietly wandered over her as he no doubt tried to guess what had gotten her so excited.

« Watch »

Couple suggestions, and I see we really are doing a perspective flip of that one scene we saw from Turo’s perspective last chapter. I’ll keep an eye to see how things change in nuance now that we’re seeing it from Sada’s perspective.

He raised a single perplexed eyebrow when Sada brought the little wooden flute she had carved to her lips, blowing three sharp notes into it. She immediately started to look around, trying not to laugh at Turo's absolutely dumbfounded face while he evidently tried to decide what was the appropriate response to the whole situation.

Just then, a familiar roar resonated through the air and behind her, and Sada hid a small smile after hearing the sound of Winged King making its way towards them. So it had been laying around here after all…

Sada: “(Oh boy, Turo’s face is going to be priceless when he sees Winged King.)” ^^

She had to admit to feeling a bit guilty in seeing Turo's expression change to fear and slight pain as he covered his ears; those roars could get quite loud, especially from up close. Winged King climbed up the rock from behind her. She heard it shift to its bipedal stance, rising to its full height and towering over them both. Turo managed to open his eyes again and seemed to freeze in fear, not unlike he had done against the Brutal Fang that had almost killed him, shrunken pupils fixated on the figure right behind her, not moving a muscle, breath caught in his chest.

All right... Now she was starting to feel really bad about the whole thing. She happened to move away right as he jumped up, arm outstretched and trying to grab her, and even as she neared the dragon she felt a small quick surge of warmth in her chest. He had tried to save her. Even while obviously terrified and helpless, he had moved to try and get her out of what he thought was mortal danger.

Sada: “... Okay, yeah, in retrospect, I should’ve explained what was going on before I summoned Winged King, huh?” ._.;

Sada quickly moved by Winged King's side and started to pet the lizard's head feathers to reassure Turo that they weren't in any danger.

It took him a bit to realize that Winged King wasn't going to hurt them; Sada smiled proudly, cheeks flushing slightly at Turo's short, incredulous laugh. He slowly approached the creature, still quite fearful and hesitant, until he stood by her side, completely transfixed by the creature. The name seemed to confuse him, and she realized that he probably had no idea what King meant. Umm... How could she even explain it?

Couple wording tweak suggestions for your second paragraph in this block.

Ah, but did it even matter at the moment? There were definitely more exciting things to show him right now! One word could wait.

That actually makes me wonder if ‘King’ in Sada’s language has a different nuance than what we’re used to in the present day or not. Something I’ll keep an eye out for in future chapters.

She turned back towards Winged King and tried to get him to lay down.

« Just get down a moment... "Down"»

She caressed the leathery skin of its throat, where three smaller spikes seemed to protrude from it; the lizard seemed to like it, because it raised its head to give her better access to it, eyes squeezed shut, before opening them up again in disappointment when the petting stopped. It looked at her hand, and she immediately took the chance to point it at the ground to get the creature to lower its head.

« Down» it growled but obeyed, lowering itself back down on all fours.

Huh, Koraidon sure learns fast. A little surprised no need for food bribery this time, but I guess Sada must’ve cracked the code for getting commands followed without it just beforehand.

She mounted it - still with some difficulty - and turned back towards Turo, smiling and encouraging him to get near.

« Come!»

She almost had expected him to hesitate and refuse, shaking his head while muttering something like he often did, but now it was his turn to surprise her. He approached the lizard, planted his boot firmly against a specific spot on the creature’s hind legs, and jumped up quickly swinging his other leg over in a single, fluid motion she honestly didn't even think him capable of. He made it look so easy, like he did it everyday. Sada just stared at him, stunned, and after a moment he seemed to realize that something was off.

Sada:

Turo: “(... Crap, right, they haven’t domesticated ride Pokémon yet. Just play it cool, Turo…)”

That he had messed up. His face became completely neutral, like it often did when she tried to approach some subject he wasn't comfortable with. It was almost like watching some of the wooden masks Narjik wore during some of their rituals slide right over his face, every single feature carefully crafted and controlled to not betray even the slightest hint of emotion. Their eyes met, and for a couple of long moments none of them both dared to move or even breath.

Then Turo spoke, trying to act like nothing was wrong.

Sada: “... Turo, what did you do?”

Turo: “I… got onto the lizard like you asked me to? He’s surprisingly docile right now.” ^^;

He knew. He knew that she knew that he was hiding something.

Turo:

Sada: “Turo, could you make this any more obvious right now?” >_>;

She was tempted to question him about it, but decided against it after a moment. No use doing it right now. With a resigned sigh, she turned back around to direct Winged King. While the dragon started making his way off the rock, she listened for Turo's reaction, but even then, there was nothing but silence coming from behind her.

... Was he busy trying to come up with some excuse to give her later? Because she was going to question him about it. When the dragon sped up, Turo finally gave a reaction more in line with what she had been expecting of him from the beginning, trying to not fall off. What Sada wasn't expecting was for him to grab onto her to do it. She was suddenly acutely aware of his weight onto her back, his hands lightly pressed around her waist, and she involuntarily let out a startled gasp.

"Focus".

She needed to concentrate in order to avoid both of them falling off the dragon.

Whelp, time to see just how weirded out Sada gets when she notices that Turo’s taking to riding Koraidon just a bit too naturally for someone from her time.

She leaned forward on the dragon, starting to give him instructions just like they had practiced; without the promise of immediate food, the lizard was quite more reluctant to follow her directions, but she didn't exactly need it to be perfectly obedient at the moment. It was already incredible that it was actually listening to her: sometimes she still found herself in disbelief at it all.

Just a couple of days earlier, and she wouldn't have dared to dream of being able to do something like this. And now... Here she was! Not only riding a peaceful creature but one as amazing as Winged King.

Another paragraph that IMO works better split up into two smaller ones.

With a smirk, she gave it one last command: this one they hadn't had much time to practice, so she wasn't sure if it even remembered what she wanted him to do. So when the dragon suddenly started climbing a tree, then jumped off it and spread its wings to fly, she couldn't help letting out an exhilarated laugh.

… That must be quite the tree there. ^^;

The wind, it felt amazing! It was so much stronger up here, so much colder. Winged King's scales radiated a reassuring warmth as it flapped its wings and flew slowly over the forest before circling back to where they had come from. Turo's grip on her had suddenly gotten much stronger, the man probably worried at the idea of slipping sideways from the creature's back and plummeting to the ground from that height.

Ah, so Koraidon’s doing that slow glide it does in the games. Though I like how Sada is just completely unconcerned about the whole “what if I slip and fall” angle here. Definitely gives some nice characterization for how her attitudes towards danger and risk-taking are.

They landed quite rockily back on the ground, and she quickly jumped down to give a growling Winged King the very deserved prize he was probably demanding right now.

Turo jumped down with way less grace than when he had gotten up, looking a bit distracted.

Probably still freaking out over “whoops, wasn’t supposed to do that” from earlier after mounting Koraidon.

Of course he would be! They had just been flying! She grabbed both his hands, elated. Did he have any idea what this meant?! They could explore places that were difficult for people to reach, they could see the world like no else had ever done before! They could even... She hesitated a moment when the thought struck her.


«We can... go to your people ? » she asked, barely daring to hope for a positive answer. If he said yes... Just a little visit! A really short one... She just wanted to see where he actually came from. What kind of places had creatures that could make paper and his weird stretchy clothes and that had writing and who knew what else…

Turo:

Sada: “That’s a yes, right?” ^^

Turo froze, and then slowly moved his hands out from hers, hiding them both in his pocket, eyes low, and she already knew what he was going to say.

‘No’, obviously.

Both hands went back to her side, one balling up in the first surge of annoyance and real anger that she had ever felt towards him.

Did... Did he think she was stupid? What kind of excuse was that? That was the whole point of being able to fly now, so what if it was far away?! If he was scared of going back to his tribe or whatever fine, he could just show her the way once they arrived near there and she could go herself!

Yeah, Sada’s totally going to wind up hitching a ride with Turo back to the future uninvited at some point, I can already tell.

The anger didn't last long, quickly replaced by something a more subdued mood: a quiet disappointment in realizing that even after saving his life, after all the hours they had spent together, side by side, slowly teaching each other words and talking and laughing... He still didn't trust her enough to reveal pretty much anything about himself.

Couple of suggestions for some small tweaks to this paragraph.

Always disappearing at sunset. For every word he said, she had the feeling there were five more he had decided to keep to himself.

Just... Why?

What honestly deserved so much secrecy?

Rules of time travel. even if Turo’s just been casually breaking those left and right for about five chapters now.

An uncomfortable silence fell between the two; Sada bit her lip, petting Winged King that had bumped her shoulder with its snout.

Oh, so she’s doing a

right now.

« I...»

Turo was mumbling something, eyes fixed to the east, where the smoke of various campfires was snaking up towards the sky. She suddenly remembered that it was also the direction he had come from just before.

"Can I come to your people...?"

His question was so unexpected that she had to make sure she had heard right.

Small typo at the end there.

She stared at him, eyes wide. Did he... Did he really ask to...?

Had she been wrong? Had he refused because he was already planning to come to her settlement in the end?

Technically, this is more him getting guilted into throwing you a bone, but you don’t know that right now, Sada.

Sada couldn't help hugging him, throwing her arms around his neck, laughing happily. She accidentally brushed against his chin and paused for a moment, surprised by how spiky his beard felt, then hastily let go, regarding him with an enormous smile.

« Let's go!» she offered, grabbing his left arm, mind already racing towards all the things she would have to explain to him about how the settlement worked, how they lived, and... And...

She heard Turo stutter something out from behind her, and she turned to look back at him.

« What ...?»

Sada: “Didn’t you just say you wanted to see my people, Turo? What’s the big idea?”

He looked flustered, face slightly red. And nervous. Sada smiled, trying to reassure him.

« It will be fine!»

She tugged encouragingly on his arm again, and he slowly, slowly brought his left hand out from where he had shoved them away just earlier. Sada grasped it with her right hand, and before she could consciously think about it, found herself interlocking her fingers with his. She squeezed them slightly, rubbing her thumb on the back of his hand. Turo flinched slightly, wide eyes never leaving her face. His lips parted and he seemed on the point of saying something.

« It will be fine.» she repeated, gently, and he stopped, before nodding slowly, eyes never leaving her face.

Just saying, with how much you keep saying “It will be fine!”, I’m pretty sure that this is tempting fate something fierce right now.

Sada led him towards the camp, walking half a step ahead of him like they often did, still never letting go of his hand. Winged King followed them for a while, before turning back around and flying away when it realized that they were going towards the settlement.

Oh, so Koraidon’s people-shy… for now, anyways.

Along the way, she felt Turo trip behind her a couple of times and smiled, feeling a surge of affection towards the awkward man. To distract him, she pointed out a set of footprints on the trail.

« These are from a Bushy Pelt » she said, before explaining as best as she could about their incredibly thick, white fur. They moved in packs, and would leave white strands of fur pretty much everywhere. Turo nodded along, but if she had turned around to look at him a bit more often, she would have noticed that he seemed much more interested in glancing at her instead of whatever she had been pointing at.

Small missing comma there. Though ‘bushy pelt’, huh? I wonder if those are Cottonee or something else?

Turo seemed to become more and more nervous the nearer they got to the settlement and more and more traces of human activity showed up.

Sada: “Um… Turo? Are you alright right now?”
Turo: “P-Perfectly fine!”

He stared with wide eyes at the large tents and temporary huts that had been erected near each other in groups of three or four, in a wide circle. Great bones and tusks were used to create the walls, with furs thrown on top and sewn together to create a barrier against the sun, the rain and other elements.

He didn't seem to be familiar with them, and she wondered what materials his people used to build things. Surely not that weird stretchy skin they seemed to use for clothes?

That actually makes me wonder if Sada even has a frame of reference for glass considering the point in time they’re in.

Smoke was coming out from a hole in the top of some of the larger ones, where someone was probably cooking something, judging by the smell that was coming out of it. A larger campfire, now still empty and cold, sat at the rough center of the settlement, this one usually used as a communal meeting point by everyone in the group to sit around at night and share stories, at least when the weather wasn't bad.

That actually makes me wonder if they keep it going all night as a deterrent to Pokémon out in the boonies, or if that doesn’t work on them the same way it does with IRL animals.

They were organized mostly in groups made from people that were related by blood, even if almost all activities at the settlement were communal. Hunting, gathering food, crafting tools and child-rearing were all done by everyone as a group.

I see Sada’s people are of the “it takes a village to raise a child” school of thought.

They crossed a small group of hunters about to set out, Chalo and Fluffyhead among them. Sada greeted them with a sharp nod, lifting her spear and tapping the ground twice.

« Good luck!»

… Wait, Chalo takes Fluffyhead out to go hunting?

They answered her in a similar manner, cheering, before catching sight of Turo and stopping in their tracks, staring. Sada turned towards him, only to notice that he had very slightly shuffled to the side, almost trying to hide behind her. Since he was almost one head taller than her and draped in blinding white, he wasn't having much success.

« This is the shaman from the south I've told you about. He'll be staying with us from now on.» Sada opted to break the awkward staring contest between the two groups, missing Turo raising one eyebrow in a puzzled expression by her side.

Turo: “Wait, I didn’t say that! I’m just-!”

Sada: “Getting settled in!” ^^

« Ooh, finally the mystery man shows up.» Chalo was the first to react. The woman grinned, moving towards him only for the man to nervously take a step back, eyeing both the spear and Fluffyhead.

« Ooh, finally the mystery man shows up.»


Chalo, meanwhile, stared him up and down, eyes stopping at their still locked hands.

I would recommend shuffling around the location of Chalo’s line relative to the description, and tweaking the last paragraph slightly.

« You weren't kidding when you said he's weird looking. What's up with his hands? »

Sada sighed while some of the other hunters expressed similar comments.

I take it that Turo’s hands are rather visibly uncalloused or something like that? Since I’ll admit, that I wasn’t really sure what Chalo’s deal with Turo’s hands was.

She was suddenly glad that he was actually wearing the clothes she had made for him. If this was their reaction when he was dressed exactly like them (well, cape aside), she could only imagine how they would have reacted at seeing him with his original clothes.

Sada looked up at him, pensive.

He didn't look that weird.... Did he?

That feels like a highly relative question there, Sada. Though it helps that you’re more than slightly crushing on Turo right now, so that’s probably smoothing over a lot of the “weirdness” surrounding him.

Or... was she just getting used to it? She... She kinda liked it, actually.

Turo meanwhile looked ready to bolt, wide eyes passing between all of them with obviously no idea of what they were talking about. She squeezed his hand reassuringly.

« Chalo, not now...»

Chalo: “Sada, what do you mean ‘not now’? You can’t just stroll in with someone who sticks out like a sore thumb and not expect me to-”

The girl just laughed and lifted her free hand to slap Turo on the shoulder. The man flinched.

« Riiight, you two have fun. Bye, Terg!» and with that, she whistled a command to Fluffyhead and resumed walking, the rest of the hunters following suit.

[ ]


« T- Terg? What's Terg?» Sada couldn't stop a short giggle at seeing Turo so confused by that of all things.

« It's... Nothing. It's stupid.»

He just looked even more confused, but at least not as terrified as before.

It probably makes sense to put in a bit more description of how Turo’s reacting here, since it is kind of a void at the moment and feels like it might be funny to see play out more explicitly.

They resumed walking, and Sada finally ducked into one of the bigger tents, leading him inside. Turo stopped and looked at his feet, at the moss that had been used to cover the floor, and appears completely taken aback again, like he had never seen anything like it before.

I mean, he in all likelihood literally hasn’t a mossy floor like this before.

She was similarly surprised by his reaction. Had he been sleeping on cold, hard stone before now?

That was... Sad.

Though that’s a story for a chapter in the future, I presume.

The tent is at the moment was empty, save for one figure sitting near the hearth, paying attention to some pieces of meat on the fire. The woman lifted her head in after hearing them approach, and Sada couldn't help feeling suddenly a bit nervous. She had pictured the scene so many times in her head, having it actually take place right in front of her eyes now didn't feel real. She was so happy that he had finally decided to join the settlement, but what if people didn't accept him...?

Yeah, I can already tell that this assumption is going to wind up causing problems in a chapter or two.

« Mother, this is Turo. I've been teaching him our language, but there is still a lot he doesn't know so... try not to overwhelm him. » she explained, Turo's head snapping in her direction at hearing his name but clearly not being able to parse much else.

Oh, hello, Sada’s mom.

« Turo, this is my... "Mother"» she added, turning towards him, thinking back on their conversation from some time ago.

« My... Parent.»

Turo: “Um… hi?”

It took him a second, and then he suddenly looked even more terrified than when Winged King first showed up. Face completely white, Turo looked back at Mother, trying and failing to stutter something out as a greeting.

Whelp, Turo is officially terrible with in-laws. Wonder if we’ll ever get to see the flip side of this with Sada and Turo’s parents.

« Ah... Umm... H-hello...» he almost managed in a low voice.

and It was so painfully awkward that Sada couldn't help but cringe slightly with second hand embarrassment. It was just.... So like him to fly into a panic simply at the thought of having to exchange a greeting, even though she could understand that he would be nervous. She probably would too, in a similar situation.

A couple formatting tweaks I’d suggest here. And does that last sentence there mean that we are going to get a chance to see Sada flail in front of Turo’s parents?

Thankfully, Mother didn't comment on it. She nodded slowly as an answer and just quietly stared at him, apparently studying his face.

« So this is the man you've been meeting with?» she finally asked.

« Y-yes. Can we... Sit down?» Sada offered.

Turo sure looked ready to pass out from sheer nervousness, maybe sitting down would put them all a bit more at ease. Mother simply nodded, and Sada sat down on the opposite side of the fire. She patted the ground just on her right for Turo to sit beside her.

He complied, sitting cross legged with some difficulty. He kept poking at the moss on the ground with one hand, playing with it nervously. Was it... Really that fascinating for him? The other, his left hand, was again firmly hidden in his mantle.

He... Had been doing that a lot today, now that she thought about it. Was there something about his left hand that was different today, something he wanted to hide? But no... The only thing she could think of was his weird bracelet he seemed so protective of, but he kept that on his right wrist. And all the time she had just spent holding his hand, she hadn't noticed anything different.

Your paragraph here attached to Sada’s line is better off split off from the dialogue. And it is long and unwieldy enough that you should probably consider breaking it up into a couple smaller ones.

« He... Looks nothing like the tribe from the south I remember meeting. » Mother spoke up after a couple of moments of silence, catching Sada by surprise.

[ ] Oh...? She had actually hoped that Mother would recognize something familiar about him. Maybe it had been... A different tribe?

Kinda wonder if it would’ve made sense to describe a bit more of Sada’s reaction there. For instance, does she stiffen up or double-take or something like that?

« What creature does that come from? That doesn't look like fur.» her mother asked after a moment, pointing at Turo's mantle.

Sada smiled, excited; of course she would be interested in it! That was good; if they could just talk about... normal, everyday things, that was maybe the best way to make him feel welcome here.

Watch as this introduction promptly goes straight to hell in like two paragraphs.

She brushed Turo's arm and looked at his face, ready to explain in case he hadn't understood the question, but he just shifted his weight slightly and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

« It is not... fur. Not a P-... a creature. » he opened them up again and answered, voice a bit wavering but clear.

« It's... umm... not a tree... » he squinted and scratched at his chin, seemingly having trouble remembering a word.

Sada’s Mom: “Your friend has quite the… er… way with words there, Sada.”

« ... plant! It's a plant. "Cotton". Not...from here. I think»

She felt a strange sense of pride in listening to him trying to make his way through the conversation as best as he could.

I’m surprised that Sada’s people have a conception of ‘cotton’, unless those Bushy Pelts really are Cottonee and it’s a term related to said pelts.

« A plant...? I guess you could twist the fibers like we do for baskets, but... Make clothes out of it...?» her mother seemed intrigued, but Sada couldn't help but notice that Turo looked completely lost at her answer.

« She is asking... "How" you make this.»

Ah yes, going ahead and getting Turo into more trouble with the time police, I see.

His face cleared up a bit, just to go right back to nervousness a moment later, eyes shifting left and right.

« Ah, I... D-don't know... How.» he muttered.

Mother raised one eyebrow, perplexed, before turning her attention back to her.

« He knows what it's made of, but not how?»

Turo: “That’s… actually surprisingly common among my people, really.” ^^;
Sada’s Mom: “... How on earth have you all managed to survive like that?”

Yes, Turo was... Weird like that, apparently. That probably was just how shamans were in his tribe... Or... Something.

“Or something” indeed.

« Why don't you show her?» she asked the man. He just stared blankly, not quite sure of what she meant.

Putting her hand on his wrist, she pinched the white fabric and tugged gently.

« Your clothes. Can you show them to her?» she mimed taking the mantle off like he had already done one time to let her examine it.

Okay, yeah, I can already tell that Turo’s going to have a really hard time getting that coat back. Unless if this is the story of how Sada will get her lab coat.

She was sure that Mother would be as fascinated by them as she had been, and with how much more experienced she was, could probably figure out more about how they were made.

To her surprise, Turo stiffened at her touch. His eyes moved from her hand gently touching his left arm, to the space between them - and briefly her face-, then to his hips.

« Ah... N-no... Sorry.»

... What?

Sada: “Turo, what on earth is going on here? The world isn’t going to end if mom looks at your clothes.”

Turo: “... You’d be surprised, really.”

She stared at him for a moment, honestly confused. He had been more than happy to let her examine it last time, and had offered it himself.

Why was he suddenly so defensive?

What was going on with him today...?

Yeah, I figured this would be about Sada’s reaction there. :V

There's complete silence in the tent for a couple of moments, the only sound left is that of the fire and the skewered meat that is cooking on it.

Small moment where you seemed to be missing a couple of words from your sentence.

Her eyes wandered from his face to his side... And landed on the left pocket of his mantle. The one he had kept his hand in the whole time since this morning. They were pretty large pockets... At least large enough for his notebook and pen, and probably other things.

He wasn't hiding his hand from view, he was hiding whatever was inside that pocket.

Something else he didn't trust her to see, apparently.

She’s going to just yank whatever’s there and see what it is, huh?

Sada looked back to his face... And there it was again. The "mask".

Except that this time, he couldn't stop the rest of his body from betraying him. She can feel it, from the hand still on his arm, their knees touching sitting side by side, legs crossed. He was actually trembling, face inscrutable but white with panic.

Oh, so he’s doing this face, huh?

« Sada... please...»

The mask cracked, the tiniest bit, and his eyes are begging, literally begging her to not delve further. To drop the whole thing and pretend that nothing happened. To play dumb.

For a short moment, she was almost tempted to just shove her hand inside his pocket and grab whatever it was he was hiding... But... she could already picture the panicked and betrayed look he would give her.

« ... Never mind. Maybe another time. He says he's cold without it.» she couldn't help but mutter under her breath, and Turo just hanged his head with a guilty expression, surely having recognized the word.

Oh yeah, Sada certainly sounds pleased™ right now.

Sada: “Turo, we’re going to need to have a talk after this.”

« Alright. There is no rush. » Mother pointedly looked at Turo after having witnessed their short exchange, before looking back at her, eyes narrowing.

« Are you sure you can trust this man?» she asked in a low voice.

Sada: “Yes? Why wouldn’t I?” .-.
Sada’s Mom: “Well, for one, he’s not willing to do something as simple as let me take a look at his coat.”

Sada bit her lip. Yes, of course she trusted him, he'd never shown the slightest hint of ill will towards her, there must be a reason for why he had been acting like that, but... did he even trust her?

Narrator:

Sada: “Gee, thanks for reminding me.” >_>;

« I'm sure he's just... nervous. »

Mother simply shrugged, going back to handling the fire.

« If you say so. Let's just eat.»

Sada nodded, relieved, and grabbed some of the skewers, passing one to Turo and biting into one of hers.

« Here.»

The awkwardness in the air is just palpable right now. I kinda wonder if it might have made stuff in a small blurb about Turo’s reaction and what his general mood is as the food’s coming out.

It's not the first time they have eaten together, during the hours they had spent teaching each other vocabulary and discussing different creatures and their powers, but it's usually had just been just berries, roots, and similar things that she had gathered nearby before he arrived. It was not like she could go hunting and catch something while Turo was with her... both because the guy was so clueless in walking stealthily that he would have scared everything away, and because having to make sure that he didn't get his face bitten off by whatever she was hunting would have just made things more difficult for her.

So she wasn't exactly surprised when his eyes go went wide at seeing the meat he was being offered; it was probably the first piece of cooked meat he had seen since coming here.

I’m going to take that as a sign that people in Turo’s time are either vegan or else get their meat from cultured products. Since I can already tell this is going to get really awkward in short order.

If he had to survive all this time on roots and berries that he found... no wonder he was so scrawny.

Boy is Turo fortunate that this dialogue is all internal to Sada’s head at the moment.

Turo looked at both of them, almost like a kid making sure that yes, he was actually allowed to eat it.

« T-thank you... » he stared at it with a strange expression of puzzlement on his face, turning the skewer in his hand. He looked about to take a bite, before stopping again.

Feeling pretty good about that throwaway prediction of how meat works in Turo’s time. I suppose that I’ll get a confirmation one way or another in short order.

« W... what creature is this? » he asked, quietly. Sada stared at him, not really getting the point of the question. Why would it be important...?

Ooooh, maybe he was afraid that the meat came from those creatures his people didn't hunt? If they were considered special for some reason (not like she could understand why), then they obviously didn't eat them as a form of... respect, or something.

So Sada is familiar with ritual dietary restrictions. Since even if her own people don’t appear to have any such practices, she’s clearly at least heard of them before.

She simply pointed to the corner of the tent, to the Steady Glacier bones that made up the walls.

Turo got even quieter after he seemed to realize what she meant, and he ate in complete silence.

Turo:

Sada: “Um… Turo? Are you alright right now?” .-.

After eating, Sada decided to show Turo the rest of the settlement. He seemed pretty interested in the little enclosure they had built for Fluffyhead and a couple of other Spark Tails that Chalo had managed to round up in the meantime, even taking out his notebook to take some quick notes about it.

Sada tried to glance at the paper, and he strangely didn't stop her. She quickly understood why: the symbols that should have been the same he had taught her were scribbled so hastily that she could barely recognize a couple of them. Turo smirked at her disappointed pout, letting one of the Spark Tails sniff his hand. He seemed familiar with them.

This paragraph feels long enough to merit dividing up into parts. Though I see that Sada’s tribe has moved on to domesticating Mareep more generally. I kinda wonder if it’d have made sense to allude to in the background before this point, but I suppose Turo averages like a week between jumps, so maybe Chalo just needed some time.

« Sada! » they both turned around at the voice that had sprung up behind them. Ari, one of the children, had come running out of his tent towards them.

« Jesraa wants to know when you are going to teach her the other- Oh.»

The child stopped after seeing Turo, eyes wide. She couldn't blame him; he was probably the only other person from outside the settlement he had ever seen.

Still, his sudden appearance had given Sada an idea. She turned to Turo, an excited smile making its way on her face... and for once, Turo actually looked worried, like he had sensed that she had something planned for him.

Turo: “Sada, what on earth are you going to-?”

« You teach them! »

Of course! Brilliant! What better teacher than the man himself? She had already taught Narjik, Chalo and a couple of other people, but she didn't have time to teach every single person and make sure they didn't make mistakes... but Turo could! It could be a way for him to integrate into the settlement, get to know people…

Turo:

« T-"teach"...?»

... oh, right.

« Um... you show... all people here... writing.» she clarified, but his reaction wasn't quite what she had expected. [ ]

« You... showed them writing?» he asked, slowly, eyes staring straight into hers.

Ah yes, let’s check in on how Turo’s doing now:

Turo:

Even if it might have been nice to see that a bit more explicitly than what’s presently there.

« Yes!! » she nodded, and Turo looked... conflicted. He muttered something incomprehensible to himself - "aw, shit-", then sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, left hand covering one half of his face.

« Is it... bad...?» had she done something she shouldn't have...?

Okay, not that Turo wouldn’t logically have an ‘oh shit’ moment here given that he’s likely realized that he’s broken more than a couple time travel rules, but I wonder if it really makes sense to explicitly render what he’s saying there given that Sada almost certainly does not understand it.

But what was the point of being able to write stuff if nobody else could read it?

He was silent for quite a while, before lowering his hand with another sigh.

Even if he was trying to hide it, she could swear there was the tiniest trace of a smirk on his face. A proud smile.

« ... no. It's... incredible...»

Turo: “I’m… just a little worried about people that won’t see things that way.”

Sada: “What, your tribe? Lighten up a bit. If they’re too far away to fly to, what are the odds they’ll ever know?”

They entered another hut, one of the biggest ones used by the whole tribe as a meeting spot when the weather wasn't good enough to sit outside, that Narjik would sometimes use as a place to teach the children or tell old stories. He was out at the moment, gathering herbs and other materials for his rituals.

Sada had been a bit disappointed - she was really interested in watching the two shamans meet.

Why do I have the feeling that that would not turn out well given that I’m sure that Turo doesn’t exactly have a high opinion of mysticism.

At first, the children had been afraid of him, so she had sat down by his side near the fire and encouraged them to get near, translating when necessary.

Now, Sada smiled warmly while Turo traced lines on his notebook and held it up for all four of them to see and copy line by line. They were using soot to write, and it had predictably ended up everywhere, including his face, his hair, and the front of his mantle, now no longer an immaculate white but covered in black, child-shaped handprints.

Just saying, I remember the bit about how attempts to alter the past result in timeloops from a chapter or so ago. Which is probably not a good sign for the future of Sada’s tribe.

He seemed much more at ease with the children than with adults; teaching seemed to come natural to him.

I suppose that that’s fitting given that he winds up becoming a Pokémon professor down the road. Though it makes me wonder if Sada also has a talent for teaching the younguns herself.

« Where are... the "others"?» he asked after a while, in a pause from their lessons. Jesraa, the youngest, had fallen asleep on his lap, but he didn't seem to mind. He's got had his notebook open and propped up on one knee, and it looked like he was drawing the interior of the hut, pausing every now and then to study how the bones were laid out.

Sada blinked, for once being the one caught unprepared.

« "Others"...? »

« Your people. Are there "others"... » he pointed at the children and thought for a moment. « Um... small... people? »

Considering what was implied for the average life expectancy of this tribe a few chapters ago, probably busy being dead from childhood mortality, since a lot of kids under 5 used to kick the bucket early back in the day.

Sada laughed a bit when she realized he didn't know the word for children and had to improvise.

« "Small people"... you mean children?»

He nodded, still looking at his notebook.

« Yes. Children. "Others", um... not... these children.»

Cue the morbid explanation in 3… 2…

Oh, all right. Now she got what he had tried to ask. Sada simply stared at him, confused.

« There is no "other" children »

There's a long moment of silence, then Turo suddenly raised his head to gape at her, bewildered.

«... what? »

That one surprised me as well, since the historical remedy to low average life expectancies was to simply have lots and lots of children. Like unless Sada’s tribe’s definition of “adulthood” is “puberty”, this is likely catastrophically bad demographics for them that would imply that they used to have other children, but they recently all died off.

... why did he look so surprised?

« These are the only children here.»

« But... only four... »

He went really quiet after that, his warm smile at watching the child sleep in his lap becoming pained.

I kinda wonder if there should’ve been something to beat the stick over the readers’ head a bit harder that “the rest of the kids are dead, Dave”. Since in a modern context, this is actually not all that rare in developed nations from a population with strongly sub-replacement fertility. e.x. some throwaway comment like “They’re the ones the spirits watched over.” to make Turo realize that Sada’s tribe doesn’t only have four kids in it for a lack of trying.

« I have to go. »

Turo's words took her by surprise, again, for the second time in the span of a couple of hours. It's after midday, and the sun is already going down, now that the days have been getting shorter and shorter. Soon it would become much colder.

Sada looked at him while he stood up and tried to clean up his clothes as best as he could.

Go...? But he had said... that he wanted to come to her people, so she had thought…

Well, that was before he got a stiff smack in the face by reality reminding him that your life is harsh and bleak by his standards and was probably tempting him into just casually breaking all the time travel rules because it made him feel bad.

« Where... ? You can stay here -»

Turo just looked at her, silent, and she knew that whatever she could say would have no use in convincing him. Well, now she suddenly felt really stupid, getting so excited about his coming to live with them... she stared at the ground, biting her lip, almost tearing into it, a mix of anger and embarrassment and disappointment swirling in her chest.

Something gently touched her chin and lifted her head, and she found herself staring into Turo's warm brown eyes.

« ... I'll come back. »

Um, yeah, Turo? I don’t think that’s going to-

Sada glared back at him.

« Tomorrow. At dawn. » and he better not be late. If he really had to run off who knows where at night, the least he could do was run right back.

He nodded after a moment.

« ... tomorrow. At dawn. »

I kinda wonder if it’d have made sense to have expanded on Sada’s thought process a bit more. Like I would assume that she’s pretty upset and confused given that she was probably getting pretty deep into her fantasies of Turo settling down with her only for him to rip them away. It might’ve made sense to show that playing out a bit more.

She watched him leave, like always. What was different from all the other times, was that he was leaving from her village. She knew the area so well she could navigate it with her eyes closed, and so she knew perfectly well about all the possible spots Turo could choose to spend the night. The little thicket of trees to the south. The stream they get water from to the north. The great fields of tall grass.

She gave him an advantage of a couple hundred meters before sneaking after him.

Oh. Oh dear. I already know where this is going.

He was being extremely cautious; he kept turning around every now and then, making sure that no one was following him, then checking his surroundings.

Sada, however, knew perfectly well how to move unnoticed. How to keep a low profile, how to leave as few prints as possible, how to stop moving when he turned around to not alert him due to a sudden movement... she quickly gained back the ground he had covered. All the while, she is kept staring at his back, just trying to make sense of his behaviour. Why did he need to go this far out? What is he even looking for...? This surely is not a safe space to pass the night...

Turo suddenly stopped, and Sada froze, crouching low to the ground to hide herself in the tall grass. He gave one last look around, then raised his left hand and started rolling up the sleeves of his right arm, revealing his usual purple clothes underneath... and the bracelet. Outlined by the last rays of sunlight, he touched the little object on his wrist, and she suddenly had to squeeze her eyes shut, hurt by the blinding burst of white light that surrounded him...

... and when she opened them up again, he was gone.

Sada was left staring at empty air, not a single trace left of him. It took her quite a bit to notice that she was trembling, frozen in place.

He had... really disappeared. She had thought about the flash of light, sure, but deep inside, she had always assumed that it had a perfectly normal explanation.

Sada: “... Turo, what on earth are you?”

Sada had wished for it to have a perfectly normal explanation, because that would at least make Turo... easier to explain. To think of him as... similar to her, a kindred spirit.

But to actually see him do it, to disappear into thin air like he commanded the power of some strange creature she had seen... now she wasn't so sure anymore.

... what was he, really?

Yeah, I had a feeling that that would be about how she’d react.

Alright, bit of a longer and slower chapter this time, but things certainly took quite a swerve at the end there. I gather that this is the part where we hit a point of no return in the story, and what’s there does a pretty good job at getting us invested to see more. It was pretty fun to see the events of last chapter from a perspective flip, and the added events both before and after Turo’s arrival added a lot to keep things from getting stale. The Koraidon training arc in particular was cute and one of the highlights there. I also thought that you did a good job at showing off Sada’s world, including its harder edges without it dominating things too much.

Criticisms-wise, you had some typos and verb tense errors scattered about here and there throughout the chapter that are probably worth stepping through to tidy up at some point. I also noticed a number of spots in the chapter where I thought that you missed an opportunity to show off more of the characters’ reactions or get into their heads a bit more than you already did. I’m admittedly not sure how much you’ll want to get into the weed for that one, but I figured it was worth pointing out in case you decided to go back and expand a couple things.

Though altogether, I thought this was some pretty good stuff. A bit longer than I was initially expecting, but I had a lot of fun with this chapter @Nekodatta , and I’ll be looking forward to coming back for more sometime.