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Chapter 32: Our Treasure, part II

Nekodatta

Pokémon Trainer
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. koraidon-apex
  2. miraidon-ultimate
  3. skitty
Chapter 32: Our Treasure, part II
This time kept finding ways to surprise her, in both good and bad ways.

« So... you can really tell if someone is pregnant... from outside the body?» she asked after the kiss was over, her eyes wide and trying to wrap her mind around the idea.

« Yes, well... I'm not exactly sure how they do it in this time... or how early they are able to know for sure... » Turo answered, still holding her by her shoulders. Sada noticed his eyes automatically go back to her stomach, and she huffed.

« It's too early to see anything, you know... »

He smiled, looking back up.

« Yes, I know, it's just... we need to make sure. Let's go back to Mesagoza...»

They left the sandy beach and walked back up the trail they had followed, looking for a place where they could call for a Flying Taxi. While Turo was busy calling, Sada's eyes landed on a building that was standing at the very top of the cliff, overlooking the beach they had just left.

« That place must be that "lighthouse" around here, right? » she asked. She had read about them in a book in the library: they lit up at night and were used by ships to safely find land. Or at least, used to. She wasn't sure if this one was active: it looked abandoned.

« All right, the cab should be here in half an hour, they were nearby...» Turo turned around, closing the old Pokénav he had bought and putting it back in his pocket.

« I... wait.» he furrowed his eyebrows for a moment, before raising both of them.

« I... I know this place!» he said, a half smile forming on his lips. Sada turned around, surprised.

« Really? In your time?» she asked.

Turo nodded, « Yes. I visited it when I was flying with Mirai one time... it was completely in ruins there, of course, but... I'm sure it's the same one. It's the only one in the area.»

Sada smiled and took his hand.

« Let's go look! » she started heading towards the lighthouse, the ground going from sand back to getting covered in soft grass. The closer she got, the more details she could see. The building seemed to have a little house built just under it, if she had to guess, to house whoever used to take care of it before it was abandoned. A small tree - thankfully not an olive tree - was growing near the entrance. On the right, the cliffside overlooked the sea, but the little beach they had just come from was still clearly visible from it. From the top of the cliff, looking in the opposite direction, you could see Los Platos in the distance and, barely visible in the horizon, the mountain of the Great Crater of Paldea. She went near the abandoned house and tried to peer inside the old windows covered in dust.

« It looks empty... Doesn't a lighthouse need people to care for it?» she asked Turo.

« When they still used fire or electric Pokémon to shine lights over the sea, yes, there was usually a caretaker. I guess the lighthouse itself is completely automated by now. » Turo answered as he cautiously checked the door.

« Closed... But there's a note here.» he said, and Sada shifted closer to look.

« "Up for sale"...» she read, and her eyes widened as she turned towards him.

« Does that mean... we can buy this place? »

They probably didn't have enough money, but... if their research on Tera crystals was successful, they could ask to borrow some money and pay it back later.

She looked towards Turo, and saw him look at her petrified, his eyes wide.

« You mean... Live here? In this lighthouse?» he whispered.

Sada looked up, towards the top of the building that you could reach by climbing the stairs. Following a sudden urge, she grabbed the first rung and started climbing. She heard Turo gasp and hurry after her.

« Sada...!! You... What if -»

« I'm not going to fall.» she reassured him, continuing to climb. Judging by his laboured breathing, he was having some difficulty following.

« I know... that's not what I meant... what if the baby-» he stopped to take his breath right as she finished climbing and hoisted herself up on the wide platform.

The view was as beautiful as she had imagined it. She looked down, trying to picture living in the small house right under them.

« This place is near the sea... There's not too many people, and we still have a small town very close... There's plenty of space for our Pokémon... and I bet we can even see the stars from out here.» she slowly said once Turo had caught up to her. He looked troubled for a moment, before looking down towards the sea.

« ... To think... I've looked at this exact building in my time and wondered who used to live in it so much time ago...» he whispered, before he chuckled in amusement.

« ... It would be a shame to not live here after that. » he said, taking her hand and intertwining his fingers in hers.

« We'll probably need to renovate it a bit, so... we will have to hurry before the ... the baby arrives. If it's really... coming.» he said. After a brief silence, he swallowed, and she noticed that his hand had suddenly gotten sweaty. He was nervous.

She didn't understand. Why would he be nervous now?

« If... If we're really going to have a child... there's something else I would like us to do first... even just because it would be more... complicated... after.» he stammered, and she saw that he was trying and failing to keep his usual unreadable expression from cracking.

« I... I... this is not how I imagined this would go...» he was getting flustered, and she calmly grabbed his other hand and looked him in the eye.

« Turo... what is it?»

He looked at her with wide eyes, and after a moment just blurted out the words.

« ... let's get married.»

There was a long moment of silence, and she saw his expression go from flustered to panicked.

« Um... "Marriage" -» he said.

« I know what "marriage" means!» she laughed, and he looked more relieved, even if somewhat embarrassed. She got closer to him and looked away from the sea, to the silhouette of Mesagoza barely visible in the opposite direction, sitting down on the cool stone pavement.

« ... Let's sit here a bit.» she said, and he followed her after a short moment, sitting cross legged next to her. She smiled, thinking about how many times they had just done the same back in her time, as they taught each other words in their respective languages.

« Why did you say this isn't what you were expecting?» she asked. Turo looked down, the hand he wasn't holding in hers balled up into a fist on his knee.

« I... you usually ask the person you want to marry if they want to... And... I was supposed to get down on one knee, and... I don't even have a ring ready...»

« Does it have to be a ring? You gave me this bracelet.» she said, looking at the little jewel at her wrist. Turo frowned.

« No, that was... different. I gave you that bracelet so you would have something to remember me by... »

« But now I don't need that. I have you right here. You know I don't care about all those details... and you told me that there is no right way of doing things.» she spoke slowly , trying to reassure him.
« But.... if marriage is a ceremony that's important to show the society where we now live that we are together... then let's do it. Let's get married. And then have this child. » she smiled, and he slowly smiled back and kissed her.

They were interrupted by the signature squawking of a flock of Squawkabilly of different colors as their Flying Taxi arrived.
---

Turo couldn't believe he had just... asked Sada to marry him. Just like that. No plan. Just blurted it out.

To be fair, she had just dropped the bombshell of possibly being pregnant on him not even five minutes before, so he felt justified in just dropping one back.

That possibility had been confirmed a couple of days later. She was. And now he had to get used to the idea that he was going to be a father in... A bit more than half a year.

And get married.

And challenge the League.

And finish their research on Tera crystals to ask for funds for an expedition into Area Zero, which probably would have to wait after the birth at this point...

It was... overwhelming, in a sense, but he felt strangely euphoric about it. That's what surprised him the most. He... didn't think he would feel this happy about it, since he had never really thought about creating a family back in his time. But he was.

What fortune to be blessed with this gift-

There were so many things they suddenly had to do... but first thing to do, was trying to convince Sada of a single thing.

« What do you mean, "You're not coming"?» Sada narrowed her eyes at him as they were sitting at some of the desks scattered across the three floors of Uvanja Academy's library. It was one of their favourite spots, farthest from the stairs and with relatively less people walking through it, and the closest bookshelf held the entire collection of the most recently published numbers of the Occultica magazine. He and Sada both found flipping through it amusing sometimes for the absolute batshit insane theories that were presented in them.

But now definitely wasn't the moment for him to point and laugh at some photographs that mistook Magnezone for UFO sightings, or said that the Iron Moth shown in the Violet Book was actually totally an alien weapon from outer space.

« I'm saying it's better if you don't come to the next Tera Raid, considering...» he flicked his eyes to her belly as discreetly as he could, but her eyes just narrowed further.

« Why? It's too early for the baby to even show itself! The doctor said that I can still do everything I want for now... You're acting like I want to fight that Altaria myself.» she rolled her eyes, and he widened his own in a panic.

The thought hadn't even crossed his mind.

« Why, were you thinking of...? That's not the point anyway! » he sputtered.

He threw a hasty look all around, and lowered his voice. They had told no one about the pregnancy yet.

« That's not what I'm worried about. We still don't know much about Terastal energy. What if it's dangerous for... the baby?» he hissed.

Sada's expression softened, and she lowered her eyes, chewing on her lower lip with her pointy canine.

« ... We both work with Tera shards in the lab. I was handling them just yesterday-» she slowly answered.

« Exactly. But small tera shards are one thing. An entire cave radiating Tera energy however is completely different. You know how... powerful and heavy the air feels down there.» he said, and she relented, nodding, even if a bit reluctantly.

« ... All right. I guess... I'll stay here and keep working on that prototype to hold the energy emitted by the crystals we were talking about... I think I found a way to model tera shards into other forms...»

« Really?» he asked, momentarily distracted by her words, leaning forward on the table towards her.

« So if we found bigger pieces, you could... chisel them? What did you do with those Tera shards you were experimenting with?» they were so small and pointy, he couldn't imagine using them for much at all.

He noticed that Sada had blushed a bit. She was pulling the same embarrassed face she had done when she had made him Ice Age clothes out of Mamoswine fur.

« Sada...?»

« ... Don't laugh, all right? I... I made arrow heads out of them. For my bow. I was hoping to try them out in the next Tera Raid...»

He quickly suppressed a smirk.

« You wanted to... what? Shoot the terastalized Pokémon...?» he laughed, and she hissed to get him to lower his voice as a couple of students walked past their desks.

« I... why not?» she asked, crossing both arms to her chest. She puffed her cheeks.

« I hate just sitting there while my Pokémon do everything. And I wanted to see if maybe those Tera shards are effective in breaking other Terastalized Pokémon's shell... » she shook her head and sighed.

« I can do it next time, I guess...» she still didn't sound happy about it, and he smiled a little, trying to cheer her up.

« At least we found someone interested in accompanying me... And he's also going to trade you a Swinub for that Altaria, right?» he asked.

Sada nodded.

« Yeah... Who else is going to come with you in my place? You said Jacq sounded interested, but who else? » she asked, and Turo shrugged.

« No idea. Jacq said he found someone else who wanted to come.» he answered. The fourth member would be a surprise for him too.
---
There was one good thing about trekking all the way up to Glaseado Mountain, and it was that, for once, no one could expect him to wear that horrible Uvanja student uniform in that kind of weather... Or, to be more exact, no one would be able to say anything if he wore something else over it.
No matter what the entire faculty said, for Turo the winter uniform definitely wasn't enough to keep himself warm, and he had no idea how they expected your typical teenager to just deal with it. Maybe they kinda expected everyone to take a Fire type Pokémon with them? Well, he didn't have one, and wasn't planning on getting one just for that reason.
So, taking advantage of the heavy winter coat he had slapped over the uniform that would cover him completely anyway, before departing that morning he decided to actually put on his bodysuit underneath it all. Now that one would surely keep him warm. It didn't chafe, didn't leave him itching and constantly checking his clothes, there were no buttons or knots that could come loose. It was simply... comfortable. It felt incredibly nostalgic to see the lights switch on as soon as the smooth fabric got in contact with his skin; it almost pained him to have to cover it anyway with the rest of his clothes and a pair of high boots. He spent a couple of minutes idly moving his arms, feeling the bodysuit stretch to follow his movements perfectly: to his surprise, he had the impression that the adaptable fabric had stretched a bit more than usual around his waist and shoulders. Had he... put on weight? No, he hadn't noticed doing so... he was probably just remembering wrong because it had been so long since he had last put it on.

The meeting point this time would be a ski resort not that far away from Montenevera, and relatively close to where the cave where the Ice-type Altaria had been spotted was supposed to be. The one that had offered to help them with battling the Altaria and would give Sada a Swinub in exchange for it had been the one to propose that place. He was apparently a student at the Academy himself, but Turo had never seen him before. They probably had different classes. The other person that was supposed to arrive was Jacq and, to Turo's great annoyance, Raifort.

He didn't actually really dislike the woman, she was definitely smart and brilliant in her own way and that comment about the time machine had been hilarious to hear... but she got on his nerves sometimes by how she obviously didn't like how close he was to Sada, and he enjoyed provoking her in return. Also, she was a historian.
He was a time traveller.
He pointed and laughed at historians. Or he would have, at least, if he wasn't stuck in this time.

He sighed, scanning the crowd in the lobby that was ready to spend a day either skiing, snowboarding, or whatever other dangerous way of hurling yourself off a mountain people had invented, but couldn't recognize either of his two classmates.

« C'mon... where are they...» he checked his Pokénav, hoping to not see some message that announced that they were going to have to reschedule the whole thing.

« ... hello, hello, Turo! Over here!»

« ... are you "Romero Turo"?»

Turo blinked, not sure where to turn to when Jacq's familiar and a completely unknown voice reached him at the same time. He spotted Jacq's Arcanine open a path through the crowd first, and his trainer and Raifort followed soon after. Well... he at least had a fire type with him. He waved to them both, then turned towards the second voice and the figure that had approached. His eyes landed on the last person he was expecting to see.

« You're... you're just a kid

Of course people of all ages attended the Academy. He knew that. Of course anyone could have answered their request, and obviously students of all ages had been submitting reports and sightings about Terastalized Pokémon. But maybe due to his past experience with Hassel and Brassius, the idea that an actual kid that could be thirteen years old at the most could come with them in what he still subconsciously thought of as something quite dangerous had never even crossed his mind.
Man, Pokémon Trainers of this time were wild.

The kid narrowed his eyes, not impressed. He was wearing thick skiing gear, a fluffy two-colored scarf with two massive Poke Balls at each end that made Turo's skin itch just by looking at it, and was holding a snowboard under his left arm.

« So...? Name's Grusha. If you have any problems with that...» he mumbled. Half of his face was pretty much covered by his scarf, so it was difficult to judge his expression, but something told Turo that the kid was pissed.

« N-no, I... Of course not. » he answered after a moment. The kid had four Poke Balls at his belt, which were double the ones he had.

... He was probably going to be more than fine, actually, but he still couldn't help but feel wildly responsible for him if something happened. He was the responsible adult here.... in theory.

He turned towards Raifort and Jacq, who was keeping one hand on his Arcanine to stop the big canine to just stop sniffing around and examine everything.

« Oh, I know you!» Jacq said enthusiastically.

« You won that snowboarding competition last month, didn't you? I remember reading the news that a student of our Academy had placed first! Congratz!» he said, while Raifort nodded.

« That battle class together last year was really something... has your Snom evolved?» she asked, and the kid's eyes seemed to sparkle just a bit as he answered.

« Yeah... she's amazing- » his voice was still muffled by the scarf, but it sounded to Turo like he was smiling.

Great, so... was he the only one who had never heard of the kid? Probably because he didn't care about sports. He cleared his throat, trying to get everyone's attention back to him.

« All right, so... looks like it will be us four this time... the Altaria should be near the peak, so...» he hesitated, feeling Grusha's polite stare land on him.

« ... Let's just go. I'll take the lead.» he said, only to be interrupted by the blue-haired teenager.

« If it's not a problem, I think it's better if I go first... um... sir? This mountain can be pretty dangerous, and I'm the one who knows it better than anyone here, I think... maybe you should let me show the way. » he said.

Turo blinked, taken by surprise. For a moment, he wondered what Sada would have done.

He felt a bit frustrated at the idea of a kid less than half his age making him feel like an incompetent idiot; for a moment , he wanted to snap back that he was perfectly able to walk on some dumb snow: he had explored the Late Ice Age with Sada, and survived one month in Area Zero with no Pokémon and no food.
But... he swallowed.

Sada would have stepped down if she thought the kid was actually more knowledgeable than her. Actually getting there safely was what mattered the most.

And of course, he wasn't as knowledgeable in surviving outside as Sada. If the kid said it was dangerous... maybe he had a point.

« ... All right. » he took out a map of Glaseado Peak and pointed to a marked spot.

« This is where it's been sighted. Lead us there.»

---

Sada carefully set down the largest piece of Tera they had found on the table. It was a single block larger than her fist, and glittered under the light that came from the window of the laboratory. They had been pretty lucky to find a single compact piece without it splintering info hundreds of little shards.

She glanced towards the analog clock hanging on the wall. Turo and the others should have reached Glaseado Mountain by now. She quietly wondered how the battle was going, before going back to work.

« All right, let's do this-» she said to Kim and Ötzi, who meowed and nodded respectively. She put on a couple of safety glasses as the two Pokémon watched her curiously, smiling quietly to herself.
Safety glasses.
Those sure would have been convenient all the times she would chip down large stones or make arrow points back in her time. But even if the tools had become more refined and efficient, the very basic action of chiselling hadn't changed in thousands and thousands of years.
In a way, it felt incredibly nostalgic to her to work with Tera crystals. She stopped midway in picking up a chisel, looking back up, towards the window outside. It was a beautiful day with not a cloud in sight. She turned to both her Pokémon and smiled as she grabbed her tools and a bag.

« Actually, you know what? Let's go work outside. »

Both her Pokémon followed her to the school courtyard as she sat down with her back to a large tree. The courtyard was filled with students similarly enjoying the nice weather, either reading, studying, or simply relaxing. Two kids from the elementary classes were having a double Pokémon battle. A small Fidough and a Lechonk were fighting against a Tarantoula and a Marill. She watched the battle for a moment, smiling to herself, before she picked up a small chisel and a hammer and started to quietly and carefully chip away at the Tera crystal block, giving it a rounder shape.

To think that even small children in this time were already learning how to live with Pokémon, and probably would do so for their entire lives...

Would her child also get to enjoy a life like that?

The thought gave her a little pause, and she resisted the urge to touch her belly. She hadn't told anyone else yet, apart from Turo... and she wasn't quite sure when she was ready to do so. She didn't really feel much different right now, but in a couple more months, things would become much more apparent.

She kept working quietly, letting her mind focus completely on the task at hand as her hands started moving almost on their own. There was something relaxing in having nothing but the smooth surface in front of her to focus on: it was the same reason she still liked to write all of her notes by hand even if Turo had tried to convince her to type them up on a computer because it was faster. She honestly didn't understand how it could be faster: there was always some blinking icon or another in a corner of the screen ready to distract her. She could see how convenient it was, but she didn't like the idea that a computer could be used for... Everything, all of its functions fighting for your attention at the same time. She couldn't understand how Turo was able to get anything done on it.

This was much simpler, easier for her.

The chips and shards she was scraping off the block of Tera were quickly gathered by Ötzi, who meticulously picked them up and placed them in her bag. She smiled and took a moment to pat the golem's head in thanks.

« Thank you. You're a great help. » she said, and it huffed , releasing a puff of energy through his chest.

It seemed to like helping her in any kind of activity; it made sense, if Golett had been made with the intention of helping humans with physical labour. Kim meanwhile sat down beside her, looking at her work with wide eyes and purring.

Sada rolled the now vaguely round block in her direction and smiled when she batted it away.

« A round shape does work well, right?» she said, and the Litleo squeezed her eyes shut.

She kept working until she had a mostly spherical shape ready, then thought for a moment about what to do. Should she keep going in a spherical shape? A sphere would be comfortable to carry around, and people in this time were already used to Poké Balls.
She had noticed that tera shards seemed to glow in various colors, so they probably held a bit of that energy... Not much, though. They had both tried having their Pokémon spend some time near some tera shards, but it had never triggered any kind of change in them, so it probably wasn't enough. But there had to be a way to store more energy in a smaller space... Condense it, in a way.
Pokémon did it all the time: they could shoot enormous amounts of water, or flames, much more than what their bodies should be able to hold... Like if they had little batteries inside them.
That's what she needed. A battery, and something to tell that "battery" to release all its charge. She dumped the contents of her bag and all the shards they had gathered to the ground, to which Ötzi let out a slightly disappointed huff at the idea of having to gather it all over again.

She looked at both of her Pokémon.

« I need your help. Touch as many of these shards as you can and tell me if you feel... Different. » she explained, not quite sure if they would understand. Kim simply blinked slowly, then started putting one paw on every colored crystal in front of her, one at a time.

The two students who had been battling had come a bit closer to watch, curious.

« What are you doing?»

Nothing. Sada watched both her Pokémon intently, so focused that she didn't even hear the two kids come closer. The shards were all kinds of different colours and shapes... So they probably had various different types of energy that made the Pokémon change types inside them. They had never quite understood if it was the type of crystals that decided what type a Pokémon would become, or-

Kim meowled loudly, pawing at the tuft of hair on top of her head, then sneezed.

Sada turned towards the Litleo, eyes wide.

« Kim...? » she moved closer to watch her, suddenly worried. What if Tera types actually were dangerous...? But none of the Terastalized Pokémon had looked uncomfortable...

She freezed, raising one hand to the Pokémon's head to stroke her fur, slowly. Kim meowled again and looked up at her, now confused.

« Do you feel... strange?»

The Litleo just flicked her ears and purred.

There, between her ears, right in the middle of the growing mane that would glow and burn bright once she evolved, was a single leaf.

It hadn't fallen on her. She stroked it slowly to make sure, and Kim meowled again.

Sada looked down at the Litleo's paws. In her haste she had ended up putting all four paws on a random assortment of Tera shards of all kind of different types. It suddenly hit her.

« It's all wrong!» she literally jumped up, ecstatic, scaring both her Pokémon and the two kids. They looked at her, confused.

« Uh... what?»

« We had it completely wrong! It's the exact opposite!» she threw her head back and laughed, before hugging a still confused Kim and hurrying to pick up all the things she had dumped around her, running back in the laboratory.

She had to write down everything!

Ötzi simply shook his head, huffing, and followed her.
---
Turo hadn't considered how difficult it would be to even find an Altaria in this kind of weather.

« You know... For being a Pokémon that's normally incredibly vulnerable to the cold, it sure mimetizes itself perfectly in a snowstorm.» Turo muttered angrily at the third time he stumbled and buried himself in snow up to his face while he was busy looking up...

Following Grusha's directions, they had been hiking up a mountain trail.

Jacq was riding his Arcanine, who at least had made things slightly more bearable by melting a trail in the snow. At least he wasn't cold, thanks to his bodysuit, but he had honestly no idea of what the limits for keeping his body comfortable were. There had to be a point where the delicate system built into the bodysuit just had to give up.

Raifort clicked her tongue in annoyance.

« Why didn't you stay at the Academy instead of Sada? » she asked, and Turo grit his teeth.

« She's... she had something important to do.» he muttered. He didn't want to look like a fool in front of her and give her even more reason to tease him.

« Why did you come here?» he shot right back.
Raifort shrugged, her heavy blue winter coat barely making the movement recognizable.

« I wanted to see what all the fuss about these "Terastalized" Pokémon was... and I have some research of my own to conduct in this area.» she said.

Turo's eyes narrowed: he almost wanted to ask what it was, and he had the impression that Raifort was hoping for him to do so.

Which was exactly why he shrugged, said "uh", and hastened his pace to go speak with Jacq.

He heard Raifort "tsk" in annoyance behind him, and he grinned.

With this kind of weather, it didn't feel right to send Miguel out; at least Ampere probably didn't mind the cold much.

He released the Magnemite from his PokéBall, and smiled when it nuzzled up against his arm, twisting its two little magnets.

« Here, charge up as much as you want. I'm counting on you. » he offered the Pokémon a spare battery and watched it twirl in the air.

« I've never seen such an affectionate Magnemite. » Jacq commented, letting his Arcanine slow down just enough to walk side by side with him. The fire Pokémon eagerly smelled the Electric type, and barked as his big, bushy tail wagged through the air.

Ampere shied away from the Arcanine, trying to hide behind him.

« Is it not normal? » Turo asked. He eyed the researcher sitting comfortably on the warm Pokémon's back with a touch of envy.

« I mean, probably... I guess I just haven't been around many Magnemite, but I thought they would act more... standoffish. Being covered in metal, I wonder how developed their sense of touch is... do they have nerves-»

« You're not studying my Magnemite.» Turo muttered as a response.

« It's here. »
Their conversation was cut short by Grusha suddenly stopping and hiding behind a tree. After a moment, he looked back towards them, shook his head, and moved back out into the open. Turo looked first at himself, then at Jacq.
... Yeah, his Arcanine probably attracted a lot of attention anyway.
The kid had released a Sneasel, and the Pokémon started sharpening its nails surprisingly silently, its little sharp eyes fixed upwards.

Turo followed the younger trainer and his Pokémon's line of sight, squinting as he tried to make out anything that wasn't pure white snow.

For a moment, he still didn't see anything, then something moved: what he had thought was a cloud dipped closer to the ground, and he realised it was the Pokémon they were looking for, gliding gracefully downwards towards the ground. He looked back to the kid, impressed. How did he even spot it?

The Altaria still kept its smooth, bright blue feathers in the main part of its body, but most of it was covered by the distinctive, extremely fluffy plumage of its wings. Except that this Altaria's wings looked strange. The feathers that would normally puff out were similarly white in colour, but looked much more compact, almost like they were tightly compressed... then the Altaria passed overhead, flapping its wings a couple of times, and Turo felt a flurry of snowflakes hit him.

Snow. Its wings were made of snow! Or at least covered in it... the Pokémon glided closer, and he could see the crystalline Tera shards covering its whole body. He had to squeeze his eyes shut for a moment, covering his face with his arm, and judging from the muttering coming from around him, the others had done the same.

The sunlight reflected on all the snow and the Pokémon's body was blinding: it almost hurt to look at. How were they supposed to catch it like this?

When he looked back down to Grusha, he saw that the kid had pulled up a pair of ski goggles on his face, and was still looking calmly ahead. With the googles covering one half of his face and the scarf another half, his face was now barely visible and expression unreadable.

It was then that he realized another problem: this Altaria was leisurely flying around, and seemed to have no intention to retire to its cave.

« We have to stop that thing from just flapping merrily away.... we'll try to paralyze it. Everyone ready?» he asked.

« Yes.» Jacq whispered, jumping down from his Pokémon's back. Arcanine happily wagged his tail.

« Sure» Grusha nodded.

« Of course I am.» Raifort huffed, letting out a Pokémon he recognized after a moment as a Seviper.

« Ampere, Thunder Wave!»

« Glare!»

The Magnemite floated forward, releasing a brief shock wave against the now-Ice type, while Raifort's Pokémon slithered forward.

The dragon turned around, noticing the attacks, and threw its head back letting out a melodious cry. Its already bright body flashed for a moment, right before the electric charge and whatever Seviper's attack was supposed to do hit, leaving it apparently unschated.

« Why did you try to paralyze it too? That's useless.» Raifort muttered angrily.

Turo furrowed his eyebrows, not quite understanding what had happened. As far as he knew, Ice wasn't in any way immune to electric attacks...

« I think it just used Safeguard...» Jacq answered the unsaid question after a moment, making Turo frown.

« Of course it did...» he muttered as Ampere floated in front of him and buzzed almost apologetically.
He patted the Pokémon's head and felt a slight electrical shock travel up his arm.

« It's not your fault, don't worry...»

« Hey! It's getting away!»
Raifort's sudden shout made Turo's head snap back up. The Altaria had dodged the Flamethrower aimed at them by Jacq's Arcanine, and was already attempting to fly away.

It didn't even want to retaliate.

« Shit... we have to stop it!» Turo started running, leaving the narrow path up the mountain they had followed until now down the slope the Altaria was gliding down from.

« Keep using Thunder Wave! Safe Guard will have to run out eventually!» he barked towards the Electric type. Magnemite floated forward, buzzing as it passed through the various Flamethrowers that Jacq's Arcanine kept firing toward the retreating Terastalized Pokémon.

Snow flew everywhere as he slipped on some rocks hidden by the snow... his lungs burned with effort as he dug his shoes into the snow to avoid falling forward.
By his side, Jacq's Arcanine leapt past him in an enormous jump; Turo scrambled back up, squinting as he tried to recognize the shape of the Altaria against the white sky. With those pure white wings, how was he even supposed to find it...? He could barely see Ampere, maybe he should send Miguel after him, but then he would be left with no Pokémon by his side...

« Stop!»

Grusha slid past him on his snowboard, blocking his way and spraying him with a wave of fresh snow. His Sneasel was perched on his back, hanging from his shoulders like a furry, clawed backpack. It hissed at both him and Jacq, showing small white fangs.

« You can't just blindly chase after it! What if you fell down a ravine, or provoked an avalanche?!»

Turo looked from the kid towards the figure of the Altaria that was getting farther and farther away. He scowled, but the kid had a point. No use risking to get seriously injured just to chase after a single wild Pokémon.

« R-right... What do we do?»

Grusha pointed his snowboard towards the steep decline. From another Poké Ball, he released a Frosmoth... probably the one he had mentioned before.

« Me and my Pokémon will go after it. I will try to push it back here. When it does, it will take me some time to come back up the mountain again, so...» the kid's unusually sharp eyes narrowed at them.

« Make sure you have a way to stop it from flying away again.»

Again, it was strange to get scolded by a kid that was less than half his age, but he could do nothing but nod.

« Alright.»

He watched the young trainer disappear in the distance, feeling a mix of frustration and anger.

This... he had the nagging feeling things wouldn't have gone like this if Sada had been the one here instead of him. She would have known what to do. She would have reacted faster; probably studied the environment to know the area and how to best pin that Altaria exactly where she wanted.

He... why hadn't he done it? Why had he just thought things would go exactly like the last Tera Raid, with the Altaria nicely trapped in a cave? That had been dumb of him.

He needed to be better than this. That wasn't like him.

« ... Alright.» he repeated, whirling around to face Raifort and Jacq.

« We have a Pokémon that for all intents and purposes is an ice type that can use mostly dragon and flying attacks-»

« And Earthquake, if we're unlucky.» Jacq shrugged when Turo raised an eyebrow at him.

« I've seen a lot of Altaria use Earthquake...»

Turo grumbled unhappily.

« And Earthquake... great... Let's hope it's smart enough to not use it on top of a mountain... What moves can your Arcanine use best?»

« Flamethrower, Extreme Speed, Agility and Crunch are good enough most of the time... I was trying to teach him a fighting type move to deal with Rock types but we haven't managed it yet.»

The problem with Jacq's Arcanine was that it didn't have the space to use its speed to the best of its ability.

« Do you have any Pokémon that can fly, or float?»

Jacq scratched his neck, grinning sheepishly, and Turo sighed.

« What other Pokémon do you have with you right now?» he knew Jacq and Raifort both had a bunch more than him. He had seen Jacq's Girafarig, mostly because it had almost chewed on his Violet Book once, and... what was it's name... that Pokémon that was so slow it barely felt pain... Slowpoke? Something like that.

« I've got Girafarig... that Brambleghast I trained for Clavell's project... Slowbro and Mudsbray.»

He thought about it for a moment, then turned to Raifort.

« What about you?»

The woman crossed her arms to her chest, looking almost bored.

« My Haunter knows Mean Look. It will stop the Altaria from running away, but only until he's able to look at it directly, so it's tricky to use. In a direct battle, it doesn't last long. »

Turo furrowed his eyebrows. « Won't Safeguard just protect it from that too?»

Raifort's grin kind of worried him.

« Nah. Ghost Pokémon like to mess with how things are supposed to work. He can get through it.»

A plan started to form in his mind. He took a big breath, and looked at the sky. No sign of the Altaria, or even Ampere, for now. He hoped the little Steel type would find its way back to him.

«... I have half an idea on what to do.»

Five minutes later, all three of them were waiting crouched low behind some rocks. Snow had started to fall again, harder this time. Jacq had retrieved his Arcanine back into his Poké Ball, and was now sniffling huddled close to him. Raifort and her Haunter were crouching behind another rock, the ghost type almost completely submerged into the rock. Only the tips of his clawed hands and his shining pupils were barely visible emerging from the stone. Jacq shivered and repressed a sneeze.

« I should have dressed a bit heavier... are you not cold?» he asked, eyeing his clothes.

« Nope.» he mumbled as an answer, eyes fixed to the sky.

Finally, something moved. There, rapidly approaching and still almost completely camouflaged against the clouds, the Altaria was speeding through the air, a Frosmoth hot on his heels... he blinked after a moment. No, that was a Frosmoth with a Sneasel riding on its back. With a shrill cry, the dark type jumped off his ride and dropped towards the Altaria, both claws shining with a dark aura. The wild Pokémon let out a panicked cry and dropped lower to the ground. Grusha's Frosmoth flapped her wings and caught her squadmate in midair, and they whirled towards the Pokémon again, dodging the Dragonbreath that was launched at them in retaliation. They had evidently been doing this for a while. He looked all around in a panic. Where was Ampere?

« Haunter, Mean Look!» Raifort's command snapped him back to the present. He had to focus. If Ampere wasn't here, he had to adapt.

The Haunter's eye stopped the Altaria dead in its tracks, forcing it to land as it was prevented from straying too far from the Ghost type. The bird looked all around in a frenzy, trying to understand why it couldn't move, then futively tried to use Safeguard again. Turo smirked: as much as he hated to admit it, Raifort had been right.
Now they had to protect that Haunter at all costs... or plan ahead.

« Jacq, your turn.» he commanded. His classmate nodded and quickly threw a Poké Ball forward.

« Slowbro, Disable that Safeguard!» he commanded.

The Pokémon's eyes glowed, and the Altaria looked suddenly confused.

« It relies on that move too much... I wonder if it's because it Terastallized into a type that it would normally find incredibly dangerous?» he mused. If it flew around this mountain even before Terastallizing, maybe it had learned to use Safeguard to avoid freezing and his instincts were still used to acting that way... not that it mattered at the moment.

The Altaria turned around to face them and, seeing nothing but three humans and a Slowbro, screeched as it flew into a rage. Turo's blood ran cold when he realized that the ground was shaking. It really was using Earthquake...!

« STOP IT AT ANY COST! BEARTIC, ACQUA JET!» Grusha's voice came from lower down, the kid climbing up the mountain slowly and carefully. The enormous Beartic with him melted snow into water as it tried to rush desperately upwards to barrel towards his target.

Turo freezed, paralyzed by fear. If that thing really ended up causing an avalanche...

« Miguel!» he cried out, summoning the little bird to his side. « TAUNT!»

The dark type seemed to catch on the urgency in his voice, because he didn't even glare at him for releasing him in such a cold place.

The Altaria stopped the Eartquake as it was forced to focus on the flying Type and realized that it was useless. It took a deep breath and flapped his wings gracefully, firing another Dragon Breath.

« Let's focus on hitting those wings...» he commented, fully conscious that he had no way of helping doing so with no other Pokémon.

« Got it.» Jacq switched his Pokémon out with his Arcanine, who could happily fire a Flamethrower that finally landed on its target. The snow covering one of the Altaria's wings melted partially, and the Pokémon screeched in rage again. Turo quietly wondered if it was a bit like feeling what were his feathers burn away.

The wing that had been hit glittered under the sun; it shone a bright blue, covered in icy blue shards that gave the wing a jagged, serrated edge. Instead of feathers, the wing looked like it was covered by a myriad tiny snowflakes.

Suddenly, Grusha's Beartic hit the Altaria from behind, punching through the other wing and pinning it to the ground. More snowflakes flew around as more crystals shattered away from the Pokémon's body.

« We can't catch it until we completely break those off, or the wall will just bounce off.» Turo said, his voice rising in tone in urgency.

Suddenly, a flurry of silver spheres shot through the air, barrelling into the Altaria and cracking the icy shards until it completely broke through.

Turo's eyes widened when he saw a little shiny figure float weakly towards him from behind the Altaria.

« Ampere!» he cried out, rushing forward to hug the little Electric type. The Magnemite looked exhausted, buzzing weakly as it collapsed in its arms, both his magnets and the screws on its body barely moving.

Grusha staggered behind him, out of breath.

« That little guy kept chasing after the Altaria... it's thanks to him it didn't escape, it would shock him every time it tried to fly too high, even if he had to strain its magnetic powers too hard.» he said, and he looked down at the little Steel type with an affectionate smile.

« Really? You tried so hard... thank you.» he whispered, stroking the Magnemite's head.

Grusha stepped forward and let an empty Pokeball fall on the exhausted Altaria's head.

« So with your research you will be able to make it transform in an ice type at will?» the trainer asked, looking at the Poke Ball he had just used.

« That's what we hope... It may take a couple years to do so. You'll probably have graduated the Academy by then... and won a couple more snowboarding championships.» he said, not without a small smile. It felt weird to think about looking at the kid in front of him now.
In a couple years... he already would have a child that was almost two years old by then... the thought shocked him.

Grusha pulled his scarf down to smile a little.

« I can't wait to do so. That Altaria looked really beautiful... and deadly at the same time. I think... it liked the snow, but didn't know know what living in such a place meant. I will teach it what it means. I think it liked being an ice type... » the kid said, and he smiled a little.

« I'm sure you will. Break a leg, kid.» he laughed, and Grusha's eyebrows furrowed.

Fifteen years and a carrer-ending injury later, Turo would still sometimes think back to his choice of words and cringe about it.
---
It was late night when Sada heard the door of the laboratory open again. She looked up from the pages and pages of notes she had been taking, to see Turo, Jacq and Raifort shuffle inside, looking miserable. She jumped up and greeted Turo first with a hug, then looked at the other two.

« How did the Raid go?»

« It was less of a raid and more of a chase all over Glaseado Peak.» Turo mumbled, and sneezed over her shoulder. She wrinkled her nose and let him go, looking at the other two. Jacq was collapsed at a desk, head resting on the hardcover of "Unown ruins across the world" she had been consulting.

« What happened?» she asked.

Raifort sat down at her usual spot dominated by maps and history books about the Paldean empire.
« Turns out that a flying Pokémon doesn't really like getting himself cornered in a cramped, closed off cave, and instead will do anything to simply fly away... who would have thought!» she deadpanned, throwing a glance at Turo, who gritted his teeth and mumbled something.

« That's why I was trying to paralyze it-»

« Yeah, and you missed! If my Haunter didn't know Mean Look, we would still be running after that dumb thing-»

Sada cut them off before they could start arguing about whose fault it was.
She didn't care about that! She had so many things to show them!

« Was it really Ice type? Did you get some Tera shards from it?»

Turo nodded and took some crystals out of his bag. She wasted no time grabbing them and sorting them in a little pile of other ice tera shards scattered all over the floor with all the others. Turo seemed to notice them right at that moment, because she heard him move and clear his throat behind her.

« Sada... Why are all our Tera shards dumped on the floor in a circle around Kim and Ötzi?» he asked, and she grinned wide, looking at all three... Well, mostly Turo and Raifort. Jacq looked like he had fallen asleep: she eyed him for a moment.

She had borrowed that book from the school library, if he drooled on it they would still blame her for the damage...

« I figured it out! » she said.

« I figured out what makes Pokémon crystallize!»

Turo's eyes widened, and he walked closer to look at her notes.

« Really?» he whispered, almost like he didn't dare believe her.

Sada nodded and grabbed the book from under Jacq's face, letting his head fall to the desk with a "thunk". The young man bolted awake, straightening his classes.

« Wah... uh... I just wanted to rest my eyes for a moment... what's going on?» he asked.

« Wait a moment before you start, I'm going to call Clavell here.» Turo said.

A couple of minutes later, Clavell was also present. She suddenly felt a sense of déjà vu, thinking back to when she had exposed her theory about primal reversion.

« All right, so... I'm going to keep this short. »

She pointed towards the piles of Tera shards near the two Pokémon.

« Before now, we were never really sure if it was the crystals that decided what a Pokémon would terastalize into, or if it was something decided by the Pokémon themselves in some way... I think that the crystals release a neutral energy that allows Pokémon to terastalize, and then by staying near a terastalized Pokémon they absorb their "type charged" energy and become shards of a specific type. So the way to make Pokémon terastallize is by focusing this "neutral" energy on them... or maybe, instead of "neutral", it's actually the energy of all types combined, with each Pokémon only reacting to certain frequencies. Like light being made of different colors.» she started to explain, walking back and forth between her desk and Clavell's. She hazarded a look around; everyone was looking at her intently.

« So it's not that the Pokémon making places rich with Tera crystals their den transforms them into a certain type... they are already of that type and when they Terastallize it affects the surrounding Tera crystals... » Clavell commented.

Sada nodded, then opened up the book she had in hand to a certain page. It showed Pokémon that resembled letters of an ancient alphabet.

« I was reading this book about Unowns and how they tend to appear in ancient ruins... I wanted to know why there seems to be no trace of them in Paldea and other regions... and I read about this move they all possess, "Hidden Power". Apparently any Pokémon can learn it, and two Pokémon of the same species can have it manifest with the power of different types... isn't it a bit like a limited version of Terastallizing? » she asked, eyes sparkling. It was so fascinating, how a Pokémon's move could say so much about their biology!

Turo's eyes widened, and he started smiling.

« What if they are the same thing... is there a way to know what type a Pokémon's Hidden Power will be? If we can measure the Hidden power of some of the Terastallized Pokémon we caught like Grusha's Altaria and it happens to be Ice type...» he turned to ask the others. Jacq hummed as he raked one hand through his disheveled hair.

« It's quite difficult actually... some sensitive humans with psychic powers can apparently feel it... people have been trying to build some devices to measure it, like the Silph Scope that can identify Ghost types if they are hiding or camouflaging themselves... some types are more difficult to measure than others, apparently...»

Sada had noticed that Turo had suddenly gone really quiet.

«... I'm sure I can do it.» he mumbled to himself, before looking back up.

« So all of this... how does it relate to actually getting Pokémon to terastalize?» he asked.

Sada couldn't help a little triumphant smile. She couldn't wait to see their reaction at what she had discovered.

« I had already noticed that some tera shards seemed to hold more energy than others. Bigger pieces held more energy of course, but if we want to create a portable device to Terastal Pokémon everywhere, we needed to compress it... and also to combine energy from all types in a suitable container. So I started working on this bigger crystal we found, by chipping it down... and I realized there's a specific shape that is... I guess... much more efficient in holding this energy. » she said, laying down the fragment of crystal she had been working on on the table. Everyone crowded near to have a look at it.

« ... a hexagon? » Raifort asked, picking the hexagonal gem up and turning it around.

« Why a hexagon exactly? » Clavell added, and Sada shrugged.

« I'm still not quite sure about that, but... how many types are there?» she asked.

« Seventeen...» Raifort, Jacq and Clavell answered at the same time.

« Eighteen-» everyone turned to look confusedly at Turo, who flinched slightly. His eyes flicked around for a moment, uncomfortable.

«... you know... seventeen plus the Fairy type...» he added after a moment in a low voice, sounding uncertain.

Clavell narrowed his eyes at him, while Raifort and Jacq exchanged a glance, confused. Turo clenched his teeth, and Sada noticed him clamming up like he used to do when he was hiding something from her. For a moment, she also panicked. Was this something people weren't supposed to know?

«... that one still hasn't been officially recognized.» Clavell said after a moment, and everyone turned towards him.

« Professor Sycamore in Kalos is busy working out the last defining characteristics of officially declaring it a new type, and reclassifying some species that had been incorrectly misclassified until now, but yes, there probably are actually eighteen types. Did you read his research, by chance?» he asked Turo, who seemed to visibly relax.

« Yeah... caught some news about it while we were in Kalos... » he mumbled.

Sada mentally thanked Clavell: she wouldn't have known what to say to help right here.

« So... eighteen types... 18 is divisible by 6, right?... look, I actually am not really quite sure why it does, but... the Scarlet Book inspired me. There's this hexagonal shape drawn in one page, so I tried to chisel down the Tera to copy that shape. After all, if Heath put that shape in the book, it must have something to do with Area Zero, and that's where this phenomena seems to come from-» she noticed Clavell's eyes widen in alarm a second too late. Sada shut her mouth, realizing her mistake.

« And how do you know that?» Jacq asked, curious.

They had never quite made it public that they had already been in Area Zero before, and that they knew for certain that the exact same crystals were growing even larger under there, to the point of covering whole patches of ground, trees and making even the air sparkle and glimmer.

After a couple of seconds, it was Turo that spoke up.

« I mean... it just seems reasonable to assume the source is somewhere under there... Heath mentions finding "glowing gemstones" and... stuff, in both the Scarlet and Violet book...»

« Oh... I guess so..., yeah.»

Sada took the hexagonal gem she had chiseled from Raifort's hand and one by one, held it near tera shards of each color still scattered on the ground. When it got in contact with each Tera shard, the gem would glow for a brief moment.

She turned towards both her Pokémon.

« I'll show you... I only managed to do it for a short moment because the shards don't hold that much Terastal energy. Ötzi, come here.»

The clay golem tottered over to her, and she held the gem over his head. It glowed bright for a moment, and so did the Pokémon, filling the room with a bright flash of light. Everyone had to cover their eyes until the light subdued, and when it did... the Golett actually still looked kind of the same.

« Um-» Clavell looked like he didn't quite know what to say.

« ... I know it doesn't look like much, but... doesn't the air feel warmer? And if you look at the clay here, doesn't it look kinda... crystally....? I think he's a Fire type now-look, the energy burning in him is all... firey now-» Sada pointed to a spot near the Pokémon's waist. The others didn't really look convinced.

« Isn't that how a Golett always looks...? »

« Argh... Kim! Come here! It's much more visible on her, I swear...» she said, as the poor Ghost type huffed and stomped back in his corner, dejected.

She held the gem near various other Tera shards again, then repeated the process for the Fire type.

« Look carefully at her mane... there!»

There was a long moment of silence.

« That's... did her hair just sprout leaves?» Clavell asked in a whisper, before carefully crouching down to examine the Pokémon. The Litleo scratched at her mane, then shook her head.

Sada grinned proudly as Turo shot up from his chair and tripped in his haste to cross the room.

« I can't believe it... so she's a grass type now?»

Right as he had said it, Kim shook her head, and the leaves that had grown attached to her short mane burst into flames. Sada hurriedly batted the remaining embers away, to avoid anything else catching fire.

« Just for a moment, but... I think she was, yes. I want to finish building a sphere where we can set this gem... And then try charging it near one of the big Tera raid crystals. That should be enough to terastalize a Pokémon completely. » she took a big breath after saying all that, and a moment later, Turo had thrown both his arms around her neck. Sada yelped in surprise as he laughed and hugged her close, cautiously, to not press too much against her. He wasn't the type of such public show of affection usually, so he must have been incredibly excited.

« You're... you're incredible! I... I love you so much -» he whispered in her ear in her language.

« Well... we still have to prove it actually works by building a working prototype... and everyone here also helped... » she replied after a moment, shifting away from him.

« And...» she kept her hands on his shoulders and switched back to Paldean, turning her head towards the others present.

« There's... something else we want to announce to you all here.» she added, looking briefly towards Turo. His eyes widened for a moment, before he nodded, and she caught Clavell also looking suddenly tense all of a sudden.

« Um... Sada... what do you have in min-» the teacher started to say.

« Me and Turo are getting married.» she blurted out.

The room seemed to explode.

Raifort slumped dejectedly back on her chair.

« There goes the girl of my dreams... » she mumbled, so low that Sada barely caught it, and was left wondering at what she meant.

« Wait, you mean... you two were dating??» Jacq gasped, and Turo and Clavell groaned in unison as they turned towards him.

« ... Really? You even helped me look for apartments for two here in Mesagoza!» Turo chuckled.

« ... I thought you were just sick of the school dorms...»

« Jacq, my dear, you are brilliant when it comes to Pokémon biology, but at least try to be a bit less absent-minded towards literally everything else?» Clavell shook his head, before turning towards them both.

« Congratulations! I will help in planning the ceremony-»

« No, actually... something small and private will be fine...» Turo tried to say, to no avail.

« Nonsense! Two brilliant students of our Academy getting married! If it's in a year's time and you already graduated and published your work on Terastal Energy by then, this will be incredible news! An incredible start to both of your careers!» Clavell said, grabbing a bunch of papers and a pen as if he literally wanted to start making a guest list right now.

Sada panicked for a moment. An entire year for getting married?!

« We can't wait that long!» she said. By that time, the baby would already be born, they would have no time for a wedding!

Everyone turned to her again in various degrees of confusion.

« Why not?» Raifort asked, narrowing her eyes at her.

Sada chewed on her lips for a moment. Turo had gone pale. He looked at her, and she nodded. He sighed, and took a deep breath, almost steeling himself for the chaos that would soon erupt in the room.

« B-because... we are also expecting a child.» he had gone completely red in the face as he said it, but a radiant grin slowly opened up on his face, and she found herself grinning as well.

In a way, it was like saying it out loud to someone else had made it real.
A child. Their new life to treasure.

« I'm pregnant. That's why we thought it best I stay here today.» Sada added.

Clavell's pen simply clattered to the floor.
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, there's an ongoing reviewing challenge on Heartache, so dropping in for a quick review to pick up where I left off on.

Chapter 2

When Turo first gives her something that he pulled out from that shiny mantle he is wearing, Sada can't help but get excited. Trading between other communities is nothing new, but it's always... The usual stuff. Furs, obsidian and other rocks and gems that they can't get here, like teeth and scales from creatures that don't live in this area.

Sometimes food. This was new; she had never seen such garments, especially not so perfectly made. She thought that she wasn't half bad at sewing clothes, but when she tried to examine that cloth, she couldn't find a single seam or hole where the needle went through. Whoever did that must have been incredible in their art.

Small typo on the ‘tooth’ there, since from context, you seem to be talking about multiples of them. Though I see that Turo just gives no craps about potentially triggering a butterfly effect by leaving stuff from the future in the distant past. Totally won’t cause issues at some point.
994427253242990704.webp


And... And the feeling! It was so smooth to the touch and so different from the pelts she was used to working with: the creature it came from must have had some incredible fur. She had tried to ask him where he came from, but it didn't look like he had understood her question. She is so focused on examining that new material that it takes her a moment to notice that the man is running away.

inb4 it’s some cheap mass-produced slop like polyester. :V

« Wait!» she calls after him, but loses some precious seconds in grabbing her belongings: writing tool in one hand, the sheets of ... stuff in the other, she has to fumble around a moment before managing to grab her spear and start running. He is already far off into the trees, hidden from view, but the rustling of his clothes and the crunch of leaves under his shoes is still clearly audible... And then it stops, suddenly.

Huh, so they have writing 14,000 years in the past. Here I was thinking that Sada would be using pictograms or something like that. Though that makes me wonder whether her culture’s writing is based around etching a la cuneiform or if they’ve developed brushes by this point in time.

She catches up to where he was, and finds him just.... gone. Vanished without a trace.

She checks the trail of footprints he left behind: the shoes he was wearing were also weird. Heavy and smooth, they almost looked like they were a single piece with his purple clothes. They honestly didn't look very comfortable: how does he take them off? Do they come off.... All in one go, all or nothing? But they do leave some nice, clear imprints in the ground... Which again, doesn't really sound that safe if you want to avoid predators, but makes it more convenient for her, so she is not going to complain. But the footprints don't tell her much: they also just vanish suddenly.

How? Is he a really good climber? She raises her eyes and starts checking the tree branches over her head. Did he... Climb them and start jumping from tree to tree? Did he step in his own footprints backwards to throw her off and then went another way? She keeps looking around for a bit, but can't find any other clue about what happened. Someone else would have been suspicious, troubled.... Maybe even scared.

Sada just tilts her head to the side.

"... interesting"

I’m surprised that Sada’s mind didn’t also go to more morbid possibilities like Turo getting carried off by an aerial predator even if the lack of disturbed vegetation would’ve led her to rule that out fast enough. Since you’d think that in a culture where you’re up against Pokémon with nothing but simple weapons, that “picked off by predators” would be a valid worry.

She gathers her things -properly this time -, and starts to make her way back. She is quite a bit away from her settlement; they've set up tents and plan to stay there for a couple more full moons, until the snow starts to fall more often and the herds of Steady Glaciers - the great wooly beasts with icy breath - will move further north. If she walks briskly, she will have to spend only one night alone before meeting up with the rest of her group.

M
en usually are the ones who go out hunting, but it's not unusual for women who are not taking care of children to also explore and scout ahead. Finding new possible food sources, exploring trails and of course monitoring the creatures to make sure that nothing dangerous got too close to the settlement... There was always something to do, and no hands to spare. She personally enjoys exploring much more than being stuck paying attention to a bunch of kids, even if it was more dangerous. It gave her time to think, especially when it led to strange experiences like that of today.

Oh, so they don’t have contemporary names for Pokémon yet. Neat little detail, though I’m guessing the ‘Steady Glaciers’ are supposed to be Mamoswine?

That said, this paragraph is long and idea-dense enough that you probably want to consider hacking it up into at least two parts.

That man... Just where had he gone off to?

confused-bird.gif


Well, I mean, we do as readers by virtue of getting to see Turo blip out last chapter, but still.

When the sun disappears and night comes, she opts to stop for the night; she's been following the river backwards the whole time, but cautiously decides that it's better to not stay too near the water. Night creatures could possibly come to drink, and she would be too easy of a target. She enters the thick of the trees again until she finds a nice spot to camp. With her back against the great trunk of a pine tree, she clears the area around the roots, gathers some rocks from the river and places them in a circle to light a fire. Still a bit damp, the rocks will prevent it from spreading too much, and the little spiky leaves and branches will make for good fuel. From a little leather pouch tied to her hip, she pulls out some berries she has picked up along the way.

She's got a good variety gathered; they are perfect to eat while walking, and in a pinch, some of them can even be used against creatures. She has been carefully observing which kind creatures like to eat and which they don't, and the effect they seem to have on them. Satisfied, she quickly eats a dinner of some of the hardest berries cooked on the fire and then goes back to her most pressing concern: examining Turo's gifts, obviously.

Yup, she’s definitely has the skillset and mindset to be a professor at this rate. Though it’s going to be quite something to see how she winds up getting yeeted into the modern day and how she adapts to things.

They were also both from some never seen material she’d never seen before - honestly, did that guy have anything she had ever seen before, except for his being a person?-. The pieces that he showed her how to paint on were both incredibly thin and light as feathers, and bound together with what she could only guess was some sort of tree bark. That sure was a smart way to make sure they didn't fall off... It was also both pretty flexible and fragile at the same time; it crinkled easily, leaving marks, and it also tore at the slightest pull.

Right, we’re well, well before the invention of paper right about now, meaning that Sada’s more likely used to making drawings on some combination of hide, wood, and stone. Even if she’s not all that far off with that “tree bark” guess there.

That saddened her a bit: she didn't want to waste it... She stared at the little corner she had accidentally ripped off, way too small to draw on and, after a moment of consideration, cautiously licked it. It.... Tasted a bit like leaves. Less bitter, and much more dry. Was it a kind of leaf? Sada stares at the pine needles that she was keeping in a little pile near her for the fire for a second.

... She was not going to start tasting every single leaf to find which one these sheets were made of, even if a part of her kinda wanted to. Too risky. Better to just ask Turo when she saw him again.

Probably a good thing there, since that sounds like a fast way to get poisoned by doing something like licking oleander leaves. ^^;

Still... If it was a leaf... She threw the little piece in her hands in the fire and watched it burn almost incredibly fast, blackening and turning to ash in a split second. She nodded to herself, happy to have her little idea confirmed; with how dry it was, no wonder it burned so quickly. And maybe like anything else from Turo it had come from some unknown creature: there were quite a lot of plant ones, even if most of them didn't seem to like the cold.

That was fine by her: the plant creatures were dangerous, with bright flowers that could shoot seeds and colored dust that could put a person to sleep, make them sick, or even immobilize them completely, leaving them in the worst state she could fathom, fully conscious but completely helpless.

So, nobody’s started training Skiddo yet locally like that one Pokédex entry then, I see. Since if they had, you’d think there’d be a bit less reflexive “Grass-types scary” here.

A chill that had nothing to do with the cold crawled along her back, and she made sure to check the branches overhead. Some of those creatures could even hang from trees, but if there is one thing they seemed to hate more than the cold, it was fire. She should be safe here.

Still... If some group of people was really out there using leaves from some creatures just to make little sheets to draw on... They must have been pretty gutsy to try and do something like that.

She distracts herself by examining the writing utensil next. This one is more familiar apart from the material, pretty much a tube filled with some tincture. The fact that it was still liquid and hadn't already dried though, that was remarkable. You could carry it around and there was no need to continuously mix ash or dirt with water. Maybe it was also an ability of some kind? She would keep an eye out for creatures that showed some power of the sort…

Whelp, I suppose that’s one way to find out that Sada hasn’t seen a Smeargle or Grafaiai up to this point, though this feels like another paragraph that would probably work a bit better hacked up into smaller pieces.

She keeps doodling on the leaves for quite some time into the night, unable to sleep, mind racing from one thought to another.

… How much of that book did she fill on her first night with it? :copyka:

« Um, mother?»

The next day, after reaching the settlement, she first approaches her mom, who's busy mending some clothes with a needle made out of bone and some leather strips. Her mother is getting quite old; her hair has streaks of white peeking out, her hands are getting wrinkled, but her mind is as sharp as ever and most importantly, as the current oldest person in the settlement, she has experience.

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Since just saying, I know what life expectancies were like statistically in pre-modern times, which means that Sadamom here also has had quite a bit of luck in her favor to still be around this long.

« What is it, dear?» she asks, without pausing in her work, bone hook sliding in and out of the fur in her hands at incredible speed. She ponders how to best describe what she wants to ask.

« Do you know of some tribe that has some.... Weird clothes? I met this man one night ago, and he was... Strange. Didn't speak our language, so I was wondering where he was from, and he got away before I could ask.» Now she pauses in her work, quietly lifting her head and waiting for her to continue.

Whelp, time to find out how well (or not) Sada’s tribe gets along with its neighbors.

« He had purple clothes that looked almost like they were clinging to his skin, and I couldn't see any fur on them... They looked more like they were made from some incredibly tiny scales. »

« Were they warm clothes?»

Sada almost gasps, immediately recognizing what her mother was pointing at. [ ]

« No, they didn't look very warm... He also had this... shiny mantle to cover him, but it didn't look like it would do much... Have you seen people like him? Are they from the south?» she asks, hopeful.

I feel like we’re missing a little context from the third paragraph there. I think that the implication is that there’s a tribe from a cold place that doesn’t get along with Sada’s tribe, but it probably makes sense to at least allude to it a bit more if so since this is essentially the first opportunity to get to introduce Sada’s world from her own eyes and perspective to the readers.

Her mother thinks for a moment.

« Can't say I have... Purple and white, you said? And "shiny"?» she sounds confused.

Honestly, she feels the same. That mantle seems useless to her no matter how you looked she looks at it, if not straight up dangerous. Way too bright to help in hiding yourself in the underbrush, and it flapped around making a lot of noise while moving.

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If the mantle can billow out and Pokémon take after IRL animals in their behaviors, spreading it out wide and making loud noises could potentially be useful in scaring hostile Pokémon off. There is a reason why people are advised to use their jackets to that effect with mountain lions in reality, after all.

The bright colors is probably a bit of an unavoidable liability, though. Since it’ll stand out like a sore thumb to any creature with trichromatic vision.

« I had never seen such a pure white. It was like fresh snow. »

« That seems horrible for hiding, unless he is actually from the far north... »

And yeah, feeling good about that prediction that Sada’s tribe has problems with those northerners.

« But he would die from the cold even with the sun out in those clothes, so he can't be from up there.» Sada objects.

Her mother nods, and slowly resumes her sewing.

« Then he must be from the south, where it's much warmer. Far over the mountains... We traded for a bit with a group that came from over there... Didn't have some "shiny mantle", but I remember clothes made of scales, smooth and really hard to the touch. »

Aha, so I’m guessing that that’s meant to be Proto-Paldea given that Sada is from Proto-Kalos. Though I suppose that’s a sign that there aren’t differences in human speech among these tribes.

… Wait, I just realized, but IRL, Doggerland was a thing 14,000 years ago, so does that mean that the ‘northern’ tribe mentioned earlier is meant to be people from Proto-Galar? Since Galar’s orientation is flipped relative to reality and if there was also a land bridge between it and some broader mainland…
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That could be it! But if he is from the south... Something else does not add up now, she realizes after a second.

« There's also... another thing that is weird about him. » she ponders aloud.

I think that it might make sense to tip your hand a little more as to what this ‘something else does not add up’ is. Like does it relate to Turo’s speech? Something about his mannerisms? While I get that you don’t want to just blurt out the answer just yet for storytelling purposes, I feel like this is a bit too vague right now.

This one was a bit more subtle, it had been nagging at her from the moment she had first seen him. Just this incredibly subtle feeling of wrongness that had lasted for a second looking at him, before being replaced by excitement.

« He is too.... Clean.» Her mother looks up at her again, now giving her daughter her full attention.

… I mean, on the one hand, yes, that’s certainly on brand for history even well into the Industrial Revolution, but still, those implications…
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Sada tries to put into words what she has noticed.

« His clothes are almost impossibly well done, but it's not just that... He is incredibly pale, like someone who hasn't seen the sun... Ever, and his face, his hair and beard, his hands, they were just so...»

I mean, considering how Turo’s world from what we’ve heard of it is apparently a Blade Runner-esque overbuilt hellhole, how certain are we that he has ever seen the sun outside of very short stretches, if ever? ^^;

She stops, frustrated because she has no idea how to describe it.

« So... Tidy. No scars, no cuts, not a single injury that I could see. Not even a bruise! And he had no weapons with him... nothing.»

That actually makes me wonder if Turo was sent back with Pokémon at all or not. On the one hand, that’d be the logical thing to fill in in place of weapons, on the other, you’d think that introducing an Iron [whatever] into some random era of history would be bound to cause problems temporally.

Traveling (apparently) alone, with no weapons, no signs of tear or use in his garments or on his body, with clothes that were just begging to get him eaten by some creature... It was more than strange. It was impossible.

Oh, so the thought of “maybe Turo could get eaten” does cross Sada’s mind. If not in the place where I expected it.

« Pale, weird clothes, no marks on his body, disappears... He is starting to sound more like a spirit than a man to me.» his mother smiles, shaking her head.

Sada looks at her for a second, almost disappointed. A spirit...? Some long lost ancestor of them that supposedly appears to give you advice, like in the stories told around the fire?

Or just a trolling Zoroark. Since just saying, those are also strutting around Kalos in the present day.

That would be.... so boring if that was the case. Also he didn't exactly give her advice, in fact it had been the opposite: some lousy ancestor that he was if he didn't even have some great wisdom to impart. [ ]

« No! He is a real person, I just know it...and I will find out what's going on with him. » she announces, determined.

IMO that we’re missing a step here in Sada’s thought process where she rationalizes to herself that things couldn’t have been just a dream, e.x. from looking at that book she got or something.

First thing to do, of course, is to meet him again, which is easier said than done. She has no idea where he went off to so the only thing she can do is go back to the point of their first meeting, hoping to catch him there again. For a couple of days, nothing new happens, and Sada grows increasingly frustrated.

How is it possible for someone like that man to just... Leave no traces of his passage behind? Not even traces of a camp, places where he could have spent the night?

She starts to keep track of every place she checks on the leaves Turo gave her, sketching a crude drawing of the area; after a moment of consideration, a couple of crude symbols get added to mark places where she knows certain creatures have established their territories.

IMO, this paragraph should be cut up into at least two or three smaller ones since it’s long and you’ve got a lot going on in it.

A little flame to mark the place where the pack of black fire breathing creatures usually hunts.

Ah yes, hello local Houndour/Houndoom.

One stylized feather to mark the nest of one of those aggressive flying ones, and a long fang to mark an area where the rivers drops in a short waterfall, infested with Brutal Fangs.

I gather that “Brutal Fangs” are supposed to be Carvahna, but the “aggressive flying ones” isn’t really ringing any bells since that’s a huge swath of birdmons. It might make sense to give some sort of “prehistoric name” to them, e.x. if they’re supposed to be Talonflame, “Diving Flames” or something like that.

Those places in particular should be safe to exclude from her search... Surely no one is going to just walk through places that are clearly inhabited and dangerous?

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Sada gets proven wrong not even half a day later; she had just finished gathering some more berries for lunch, when a sudden loud roar from the waterfall echoes through the air.

Yeah, I knew it.

She jumps to her feet, spear in hand, and listens cautiously: is it a struggle between two Brutal Fangs? Fighting for territory? Food? Those things are vicious, she has seen them (carefully, from a distance) simply fly into a rage and attack each other at random while peacefully swimming next to each other just a moment before. She waits for a second roar to echo, or for the telling sound of snapping teeth and wild thrashing.

Oh, so the Brutal Fangs are Gyarados... I think, anyways.

What she hears instead is a muffled, panicked and obviously human scream. For a long second, she can't even move, dumbfounded.

... He didn't... no one can be that oblivious to their surroundings, can they?

Voice: [screams externally]
Sada: “Yeah, okay, apparently someone can be that oblivious.” o_o;

Sada starts sprinting towards the river at full speed; bursting out of the trees, the nearby waterfall comes into view, and at its base, near the edge of the water and with his back to her, Turo seems to have fallen backwards and is desperately scrambling to his feet. The Brutal Fang, its vivid red scales glistening from the water it just jumped out from, opens its mouth full of teeth and barrels towards the man, who manages to avoid it at the last second by rolling to the side, causing the creature to crash head first into the gravel on the riverbank, avoiding him by an inch.

Not missing a beat and evidently not caring about being on dry land, the red and gold fish thrashes violently against the ground until it rights itself, its eyes never losing sight of its target. Who, by the way, seems too busy being paralyzed by fear to actually do something useful like, oh I don't know, run for his life. Sada's incredulity turns first to worry and then rage.

Oh, so this is a Magikarp. So these “ancient names” refer to the entire line of Pokémon… maybe, since I don’t remember the last time there were ever Magikarp that could credibly eat a human.

She didn't spend the last three days camping here just to watch him get eaten by a stupid fish!

The creature jumps again, and she readies her spear.

« Get down!» she screams, hoping that the urgency in her tone will get the message across.

Sada: “Seriously, how on earth are you still alive right now?” >_>;

He catches sight of her at hearing her voice and hurls himself to the side, the spear passing right over him and hitting the Brutal Fang straight in the forehead. Admittedly, it doesn't do much, but it kills its momentum and makes it crash back into the shallow water. Before it can regain its wits, Sada pulls out a yellow berry from her pouch and throws it at the creature, stunning it for a moment.

Wait, is this an item from PLA? Since ‘yellow berry that stuns’ isn’t ringing any bells for me at the moment.

Evidently deciding that they weren't worth the trouble, the creature lets out a last echoing bellow and then sinks back down into the river with a great splash, disappearing from sight and splashing them both.

Sada isn't fooled, though: they while Brutal Fangs are not the kind of creatures that call for backup, but it could still change its mind and lunge at them again. She recovers her spear as quickly as she can and whirls around towards Turo.

The phrasing of the first sentence from the second paragraph seemed a little at odds with the point that Sada is making here. Since the overall vibe is that the present peace is deceptive, while the present phrasing seems to play up the sensation of relief a bit after the colon.

Other than being drenched from head to toe, he appears unarmed, his purple clothes curiously glistening like the water was smoothly sliding off them instead of getting soaked. Strangely, the first thing he does is check his wrist., strangely; She pulls closer to see if he did get injured after all, but he seems to notice her intentions and slips his hand into one of the folds of his mantle, hiding it from sight.

Some small suggestions for changing some phrasing around here and there to smooth things out a bit.

She pouts a bit, disappointed: he's obviously hiding something from her, and that just makes her want to know what it is even more. Then she realizes what just happened.

« What. Were. You. Doing?» she asks, punctuating every word with a tap of her spear, stomping towards him.

This feels like another moment that feels a bit vaguer than it needs to be. Consider being a bit more specific about what the ‘what happened’ is referring to.

Seriously, what was he thinking? Didn't they have Brutal Fangs where he was from? But even if he had never seen one before, how could you simply stroll near something that obviously had creatures nearby? With how strong they were, you had to assume that every creature you met was aggressive!

Well... Almost every creature, there were some more docile ones admittedly, but... Brutal Fangs were obviously not docile. There was a reason they had given them that name after all.

If she had gotten there a moment later, he would have been those creatures’ lunch.

Another paragraph that read to me as if it would work better in multiple parts instead of as a single one.

He looks at her spear somewhat alarmed, obviously not understanding her, his eyes flitting between her and the pointed stone tip. She sighs and lowers the weapon, even if just to reassure him that she has no real ill will.

« Let's get warmed up.» she offers him her free hand and he takes it after a long moment of hesitation, still keeping the other hidden.

Ah yes, the
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factor of your crush from prehistory just waving around a spear while saying agitated things in a language you don’t really understand.

His hand is warm, bigger than hers, but strangely soft and smooth, with long, slender fingers. She can't help but stare at them for a moment, puzzled.

That really looks like the hand of someone who hasn't worked a day in his life. They are children's hands, it's unnatural.

Oh, so Sada’s hands are apparently callous central. Though I suppose it makes sense for a neolithic lifestyle.

They go back to the camp she had set up in the past three days; she sits him down on a log and points at the ashes left from last night's fire.

« "Fire"» she then points to the ground, glaring at him like she would with a hyperactive child that won't stay still.

« Stay here. Don't move. I'm going to get some more food.» she huffs, moving away.

I mean, considering how he just bumbled into a lake full of vicious predatory fish…
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She pointedly stares at him for a couple more seconds, almost expecting him to pull another magical disappearing act as soon as she looks away, but he just lowers his head and scoffs, looking almost... Embarrassed. Seems like he got the message.

Sada: “Thank goodness. I swear, the tribe’s children have more of a survival instinct than him.” >_>;

She is going to gather some more berries, trusting him to start the fire in the meantime. They can keep working on their vocabulary after she comes back.

« Sada....» his voice reaches her at the edge of the camp and the woman stops, looking over her shoulder.

« Thank you » The words are unfamiliar, but the gratitude and relief in them are palpable.

Huh. Turo’s certainly learning fast with Sada’s language. Though I actually don’t recall any point in Chapter 1 where it was mentioned in passing that ‘thank you’ was mentioned.

He suddenly looks so... Vulnerable and lost, sitting on that log with his strange clothes and eyes that still have that trace of fear in them.

.... A complete mystery.

Just who is that man?

Your future husbando~

She simply nods, and disappears into the trees.

… Turo’s totally not going to stick around by that fire, is he? I mean, he is a Pokémon Professor, after all. >:V

Alright, it’s been far too long, but this was a fun reintroduction to this story. While I kinda expected that it would be coming given that the story description says that the fic is about Turo and Sada, it was fun getting to see things from Sada’s eyes and how much of a contrast it is to Turo and his outlook. The world she lives in in Neolithic Kalos is pretty fun, too. It’s a much rawer and more dangerous world that we’ve only seen lightly scratched at in more official media, but it feels very fleshed out and believable. You also worked in a lot of fun worldbuilding about how life would work and how the humans of Sada’s era would interact with each other and hte Pokémon around them, and left tantalizing hints at stuff that I’m sure will be relevant in the future like the northern tribe.

The full list of criticisms can be found in the line-by-line, but in the interest of giving you a digestible version that doesn’t take 20 minutes to get through, I’ll throw in a Cliffs’ Notes version here. You had some typos here and there in the prose. Nothing too major, but you should probably make a point to do a once-over to smooth them over. I also noticed that it was a bit of a trend in this chapter to have particularly long and busy paragraphs. In general, most paragraphs tend to work best focusing on a singular idea, so when you have multiple around, it will more often than not be better off to hack things up into a couple smaller ones than keep everything jammed together in one big one. I also noticed some sections of the chapter where you were a bit vague or else skipped over some internal thoughts/logic that would probably work better explicitly written out.

But altogether, I thought this was a fun continuation from your beginning from Turo’s perspective @Nekodatta . I’ll be looking forward to coming back and knocking out a few more chapters out of the way in what’ll hopefully be the near future. ^^
 
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Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, back to chip away at that review challenge and get in some popcorn-worthy moments watching Turo fail at surviving in the wilderness:

Chapter 3

Travelling back (or technically forward?) in time to the place he had come from was much more disorienting than Turo expected. Maybe it was because, when he had stepped into the time machine a couple of hours before earlier, he had had the time to prepare mentally. There was a whole procedure to follow while setting up the time machine in preparation for a jump; other than aside from being necessary to avoid messing something up (which he still had done... Somehow), it helped people concentrate. Prepare. Even relax, if necessary.

Getting back using the time anchor was much more sudden and he stumbled while getting out of the time machine. At first, his mind was still half convinced that he was walking on damp leaves and uneven terrain instead of the perfectly pristine and smooth tiles of the Time Travel Department Laboratory.

Made some suggested odds and ends tweaks for phrasing and in the second paragraph, things felt like they were a bit long and unwieldy, so you might want to consider making it two paragraphs.

Also, cue the theme music:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WezpvuNPN1M


« Time anchor ID 9537 has returned from space-time coordinates 48°51′12″ N, 2°20′55″ E, timestamp in seconds 441504000000-»

Oh, so Turo went to the site of the equivalent of Notre-Dame de Paris in his setting. Cute easter egg there.

« Just save those coordinates to my ID before you get a stroke trying to pronounce that.» Turo interrupted the smooth artificial voice that had spoken from the time machine while he headed for the door.

Though wait, what is there in Lumiose City at those coordinates in this setting anyways? Since you’d think that Turo would be curious and want to do an internet search to see where it is in his present time.

There was a moment of silence, then something behind his back moved suddenly; Turo stopped when the sleek, round figure of a Porygon 568 zipped around him and stopped him from exiting the room, floating at eye level with the human.

>Porygon 568

Wait, Silph is still around to make those things in the present day? .-.

It still had the basic shape of a duck; why the very first Porygon had been designed with that shape in mind was a bit of a mystery: maybe because it had been simpler to code and render, or the dude responsible just really liked duck Pokémon, but it had become a bit of a tradition of all subsequent updates during the years to try and make it as outlandish and ridiculous as possible but still keep it recognizable as a duck.

I mean, there’s actually an official answer to this based off a magazine interview by Satoshi Tajiri in 1997, but it’d be kinda funny to imagine that this was a “rubber duck debugging” in-joke by the original team back in Silph Co back in the day.

If there was one thing that scientists and computer nerds loved, it was running gags. Turo knew, because he was also one of them.

Is this a reference to Turo’s English name being a clipping of “futuro”? Or am I missing something here?

Though maybe it’s just trying to say that Turo’s a scientist/computer nerd. If so, it might make sense to change the last sentence to end in “because he was also a [X]” or potentially “because he was both of them” or something like that.

This version in particular was made to look bright yellow with spiky, needle like feathers where his "wings" were supposed to be, and ended up looking more like a cross between a Psyduck and the legendary Zapdos... A little, puffy, dopey and kinda adorable Zapdos.

Ah, so that’s what the spoilered art is depicting.

The Porygon clicked its beak, quickly scanning him up and down.

« Time-displaced object detected. To bring external objects outside of the time machine room, registration of object is required.» it spoke again.

I’m shocked that those objects are even allowed to hang around instead of getting summarily disposed of. You’d think this would open all sorts of cans of worms with potential butterfly effects.

Turo blinked, surprised; it was his first time doing the procedure, and even if he knew that the Pokémon was supposed to say that - it was its job to act as a sort of defensive mechanism for the time machine and anything that got in and out of it, after all - , it still took him a moment to get what it was referring to.

« Oh, this...? Just a little... Souvenir.» he answered, fishing in his lab pocket for the necklace that Sada gave him. It.... Looked even more surreal now in his time, the little leather string with organic fangs and feathers attached. He quietly wondered from what Pokémon they had come from, with that bright red and blue color.

He held it in front of the Porygon, who quickly scanned it.

Porygon 568: “... Why did you go out of your way to bring back a collection of dead body parts again?”
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Turo: “Oh come on, they’re feathers and teeth. Pokémon can live without a couple of those, right?”

« Object is not considered a safety or sanitary hazard. Permission granted to bring it outside of time machine room. Welcome back, Dr. Romero Turo. Hope you had a safe trip.» the Pokemon beeped before moving away from the door and going back to the main frame of the time machine, disappearing inside the transparent cylindrical structure that acted as its control panel.

That actually makes me wonder whether or not Pokémon in Turo’s time being intelligible to humans is the default or not, since if so, that’s going to be a bit of a trip once we get to see Miraidon come into the story… assuming that it doesn’t just stick with the canonical “Agias” spam.

Turo watched the Porygon go, then stared at the necklace. So that meant he could... Keep it? It would have gathered quite a bit of attention on him... But just depositing it in some box in the laboratory for innocuous random objects brought from the past to be catalogued and eventually donated to some museum, like standard procedure dictated, didn't sit right with him. Sada had given it to him after all, and the girl's excited smile flashed in his mind while he stared at the little pendant.

He ended up tying the leather string around his neck and slipping it under the collar of his bodysuit. It felt a bit strange, having something that was different from the smooth texture of his suit touching his bare skin, but not exactly uncomfortable.

Actually, wait. I just realized. But is this pendant meant to be the same one from Sada’s canonical artwork? Or is it a different one?

He exited the room still in a bit of a daze; that wasn't exactly surprising even if the trip had been to only fifteen years ago like planned. "Time sickness" was apparently a thing: the human body - or and living things in general - didn't react well to passing through time. It had taken quite a bit of studies and experiments to make the trip safe; some lives had tragically been lost in the first test trials: people not landing when and where expected, or coming back with amnesia.

Oh, so casually hitching a ride with Celebi is not a good idea. Duly noted. Though was that actually a plot point as part of the Celebi movie? Or is that an invention for this story?

Now, it was mostly just an inconvenience, and some of his more experienced colleagues assured him that he would grow used to it.

No one had traveled that far back though... That reminded him.

He had to write a report about his trip, right?

Turo:
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[ ] The corridors of the Time Travel Department Laboratory (or TTDL for short) were currently deserted, which made sense, since it was late at night. Turo had been forced to use the time machine in the night time slot, since all other slots during the day had already been reserved for other - and more important - trips than his simple test run. No one wanted the night shift if possible; it gave you the worst time jet-lag ever.

Wait, is Turo stepping out of his existing room, or did he walk a bit before this point? Since if there’s meant to be a bit of a timeskip between this and the earlier paragraphs, it might make sense to either slot in a passing mention that Turo walked a bit or else put in a hard scene divider.

Soft lights blinked on a couple of steps ahead of him while he traversed the corridor and quietly switched off as soon as he had passed, leaving only the quiet hum of machinery.

At the end of the corridor, he thumbed the button to call the elevator. He always found it somewhat amusing how, in a society that was had completely converted to holographic controls, haptic feedback or single gestures for... Pretty much anything, some fringe areas of technology had stubbornly remained unchanged for centuries.

So, do they still have floppy disk icons to mark saving data in that case? :V

They had tried to use touch screens, or holographs, or even voice commands, of course, but people didn't like it.

They would press the screen and then do it again, just to make sure that the command had been acknowledged.

Voice commands had been a disaster with people getting in and out giving conflicting commands.

In this case, a physical button to press was still the best.

So… Neuralink crashed and burned or else was flatly banned a few centuries back, huh? Though that makes me wonder what other parts of Turo’s future society have stubborn holdovers from less technologically advanced eras.

At the end of the day, it turned out, people just really liked to mash the shit out of buttons.

Ah yes, I believe I’ve found the underlying motivation for the EU’s recent mandate to ban touchscreen-only center consoles in cars.

After getting out at on the ground floor, he quietly walked across the great hall of the university. Something small and quick scurried away at his feet, and Turo absentmindedly sidestepped the little Steelccino that were busy cleaning the floor, ignoring the indignant screeching of the chinchilla Pokémon at seeing him leave even just a speck of dust from his boots. One of them tried to jump on his lab coat, swiping at him with his brushy tail - the only part of its body that still looked identical to the Mincinno it had evolved from long ago, chattering angrily. The man had to almost physically push the little critter away, sneering.

Not “Iron Brushes”? :V

Though I suppose that answers the question of whether or not Pokémon in general are intelligible to humans in Turo’s time. Interesting that the “future” Pokémon in this story are straight-up evolutions (in the macrobiology sense) of earlier Pokémon and not reproductions akin to the “animals” in Blade Runner. I’ll admit that I hadn’t expected that one, but it makes sense given the snatches of canonical lore the series has provided for how Regional Variants arise.

« Come on, it's not like I did it on purpose. You expect me to go back millennia and not trek around some dirt? Shoo » Turo complained, exhausted. The Pokémon obviously didn't care, their shiny, red LED-like eyes fixing him with a death glare before getting back to work.

“LED” as in the light-emitting diode probably makes sense to capitalize to make unambiguous since “led” makes people think of the verb of bringing someone around.

They were employed by the University of Mesagoza as natural cleaners at night, which was perfect, as long as you weren't part of the TTDL. His colleagues hated the little critters and the critters hated them right back, in an eternal cycle of mutual annoyance.

If the institution name is literally “University of Mesagoza”, you want the ‘U’ to be capitalized as well since it’s part of the name.

He welcomed the sight of the teleporters near the entrance: scanning his ID he stepped into one, a smooth circular platform made of what looked like light purple glass, and recited his home address.

That wouldn't have been the most secure option in broad daylight -you wouldn't want to announce where you lived to everyone after all -, but screw it, he was tired and there was no one around anyway. The platform briefly lit up, almost seemed to hesitate for a second, calculating the closest teleporter to the given address, then zapped him away.

That actually makes me wonder why they didn’t just have a soundproof and opaque door in front of the teleporters so that way people could say their addresses without worrying about being overheard/stalked by literal whos in public.

Teleporting had become ubiquitous some couple centuries ago - of course, a simpler version had been in use since much, much earlier, with Psychic Pokémon ferrying people to and from important places since ancient history. Developing a technology that didn't require the constant use of Pokemon and could be accessible to everyone had taken a bit more time, but it was now part of everyday life.

Ah yes, calling back to those teleporters that we sometimes see lying around in the mainline series. I suppose that it makes sense that the general trend outside of some hard limitation of the universe would be for the teleporters to only get more ubiquitous and effective.

It had, for all intents and purposes, completely eliminated commuting and traffic.

… What on earth is the power consumption of these things like?
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Imagine having to spend multiple hours a day just getting to work! And then getting back home! That sounded exhausting, how did people put up with that in the past?

Money on the line makes people do all sorts of things they otherwise wouldn’t. Even if I kinda get the vibe that Turo’s world has evolved into a post-scarcity society like Star Trek even if they’ve kinda let their natural environments go.

The teleporter left him a bit away from his apartment complex; obviously only the richest people could afford a personal teleporter that would deposit them literally on their doorstep, but Turo didn't mind walking the little distance he had to. It was still infinitely better than the alternative.

For a moment, I thought that Turo was going to get yeeted straight to his apartment, but I suppose that we’re not quite post-scarcity in this setting just yet given that there’s still things for money to meaningfully buy here.

The front door of his apartment unlocked as soon as he got near enough, and with a tired sigh, Turo closed the door. He was home. Between all the preparations for the time jump, setting up the time machine and his studies, he hadn't set foot outside of the laboratory for the past three days. Of those three days, he technically had been "really" gone only for a couple of hours, but... It felt like so much more. His mind was still kind of processing what had happened.

Two hours he had spent simply sitting on that river side, talking with someone that was now less than dust. How did she spend the rest of her life? How long had she even lived?

Ah yes, this is the part where he gets the brilliant idea to slip a girlfriend past the Zapygon, isn’t it?

It wouldn't do him any good to dwell on those thoughts so much; if he wanted to keep working in that field of research, he had to get used to it.

Narrator: “He will absolutely keep dwelling on those thoughts.”

Two blue lights blinked at him from his small living room, accompanied by a low « Gwaaaoohhh » and the quiet clicking of metallic paws on the floor.

Turo smiled, hugging the Miraidon that welcomed him back and stroking its neck.

Ah yes, he’s here.
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Though that makes me wonder if this is Game!Miraidon or the other one.
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« Hey buddy, how are you doing? » he caressed the smooth light grey scales, examining them carefully.

« Is your Hadron Engine still acting up?»

The was a slight pause, then the Miraidon's throat lit up, briefly pulsating with blue energy, an electric buzz filling the room. It had almost managed to form a complete wheel shape before it sneezed, snapping back to its low power form.

Clearly he just needs a sandwich and he’ll be all better.

It growled sadly and pawed at the floor, looking almost ashamed.

« Don't worry about it, you just need to rest. We'll go riding as soon as you're doing better... And I can get a day off. » Turo added.

What does bike derg do in his free time when Turo’s not around anyways? Since you’d think he’d be a short on space to run around in a cramped little apartment like this.
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Miraidon had been with him since he was a kid, still living with his parents in Medali.

The apartment where he lived was a bit small for him, but the Pokemon could generally come and leave freely, wandering the city; still, in the past few days he hadn't been feeling too well, and had spent them mostly curled up on the sofa. With Turo himself not having exactly stepped outside the laboratory for days (except for the little trip through time), he was looking forward to taking that little road trip. Just cruising through the highway at high speed, wind hitting his face, nothing but a seemingly infinite road in front of him to let Miraidon speed up as much as he wanted. Maybe they could even practice gliding again. That sounded nice. With a last pat on the Pokémon's head, he headed to the bathroom for a shower before going to bed.

Oh, so Miraidon can double as straight-up vehicles in this setting. I suppose it makes sense given how efficient Miraidon is at that in canon S/V so in a time when they’re ubiquitous, it’d make sense that you could be licensed to ride them on public roads.

Also, how many Eurobeat albums are on Turo’s Ride Mode playlist?

« So how did your test run go? »

Turo raised his eyes from the screen that floated in front of him, stopped mid sentence in his report, and made a quick "stop" gesture by lifting the index and middle finger of his right hand. The writing program that was tracking his lip movements to write down his report recognized the gesture and dutifully stopped, then started to automatically check spelling and punctuation while waiting for the prompt to start again.

Oh hey, they have Minority Report-style computers in this setting. Though I wonder if they have normal keyboards and mice as fallbacks or not.

Waiting for an answer in front of him with a mug of coffee in one hand and a bemused smile was Gervaso Ortega, his senior by a year and accomplished time traveler.

… Wait, as in he’s related to that Ortega, or…?

Turo hesitated for a moment, then stood up.

« Depends... Theoretically, incredibly well. Technically... I must have messed something up.»

The other man gestured for him to follow him out of the little office he got assigned and into a break room, or as people in the TTDL called it, the "sanity room".

Constantly kept at a comfortable temperature and humidity, the holographic walls continually projected calming images of natural landscapes and relaxing sounds.

… Just how common are post-timeskip mental breakdowns in this story anyways? :copyka:

« Oh... It's a rainy forest today? Nice, relaxing.» Gervaso commented, sitting down.

Turo almost wanted to point out that it was only relaxing because they weren't actually getting wet, but he wasn't going to complain. A nice forest with some rain was a much better scenario than some.... Alternatives they had had in the past.

« Remember that girl that was researching pirates and forced the room to simulate a creaking ship at sea for "immersion" for three months?» he answered, sitting down in front of him and ordering a coffee of his own. The other man grinned.

« Oh man, Sea Shanty Girl! Wonder what she is doing now... If I never have to listen to "Randy Dandy-Oh" again, it will still be too soon.»

Okay, so I’m guessing those post-timeskip mental breakdowns are a bit more common than I assumed.
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Turo laughed, but his colleague seemed pretty curious about his trip, prompting him again.

He was... Actually a bit nervous about revealing what had happened.

Wait, so he’s actually going to come clean about how he overshot his destination by over 14000 years, or…?

« The trip was fine. No excessive time sickness, no allergic reaction to the pre-jump shots... Weather was fine so I didn't even have to recharge my time-anchor manually...» he hesitated.

« I may have.... Overshot the landing on the time coordinate a bit.»

That made Gervaso, who had been nodding along, pause, intrigued.

« Really? By how much?»

« .... Some 14'000 years?»

Cue the freakout in 3… 2…

There was a slight incredulous pause, then the other man exploded into laughter, hurriedly putting the mug of coffee down on the table.

« Are you serious? The new guy does his first time jump and ends up where no one managed to ever go before? You are either going to become the best time traveler I've ever seen, or the worst

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Yeah, that's what he had figured would happen.

He took a sip of coffee, only for Gervaso to almost slap it out of him by patting his shoulder.

« ... I'm going to get grounded, aren't I?»

« Oh, you are so grounded while they figure out how you did it. »

Unless if Ortega is deliberately meant to be Turo’s father, you probably want some different terminology here than ‘grounded’, since it originally gave me that impression.

He did end up "grounded" in the end, banned from using the time machine for a month. The coordinates he had used on the other hand were still safely associated to his ID; as soon as one month passed, he could, theoretically, travel there again.

Oh, so “grounded” was a deliberate wording choice after all, never mind that earlier comment then.

His original project had actually been traveling to the future - not too far away. The future direction was much more risky by definition, since you obviously had absolutely no data on where you would end up.

Wait, but would one even jump into the same future going forwards? Since if timelines are capable of branching in this setting, you could literally have two people jump ahead 5 years and wind up in very different worlds.

Most time travelers who chose the future wouldn't jump more than a couple of years; tiny incremental steps, and reports on what they knew were kept secret with the highest level of security... except for spoilers about when the new season or movie of a series would come out and how much it sucked. Because of course people wanted to know about that way more than possibly horrible news.

IMO, you don’t need the parens in this particular paragraph if you play off the contents in the parens as a tangential thought.

And that had always fascinated him terribly; it was pretty much a leap of faith into the unknown.

Potentially multiple unknowns depending on what this story’s attitude to the linearity of timelines is.

... Maybe a bit too ambitious for his first project; maybe he could... Travel to the distant past for a bit after all? It was... Really, it was so far away that it was almost as unknown as the future.

The happy smile that Sada had made while they had tried to talk only encouraged his decision.

While he couldn't time travel, what he could do, man of science that he is, was spend his time doing some research.

Miraidon: “*So… that means we’re going riding now?*”
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Turo: “... Right, I was supposed to do that. But give me a moment here.”

He pours over every anthropological book about the Upper Paleolithic he can find, digs up documentaries and even some fiction.

I’m surprised that in the ultra-techy setting that Turo lives in that he still defaults to seeking out old-fashioned books. If these are meant to be e-books in particular, it might make sense to emphasize that. Otherwise Turo having a bit more attachment to the past than most of his peers might be worth playing up earlier in the chapter (especially since I’m pretty sure that him going back for Sada will be part of that).

There is.... Frustratingly little. Makes sense since there literally wasn't even written language at that point, so not much got passed down through the ages. The timescale is also something that makes his head hurt on more than one occasion.

« "First evidence of Pokémon domestication like Growlithe and Mareep could have occurred between 15'000 and 10'000 years before common age"... Sure, that is just.... An error margin of 5000 years, no biggie. » he sighs, flicking away the screen he was reading with a swipe of his finger.

It was going to be a long month.

It’s going to wind up occurring in ~14,000 BCE thanks to Turo’s meddling in Sada’s time, isn’t it?

Exactly one month after his first jump, he walks back into the time machine room. He slips the time anchor to his wrist, checking that it is attached securely.

Waiting for him are Porygon 568 and a woman wearing medical scrubs and holding a syringe.

Wait, is this a routine checkup, or…?

« Time anchor ID 9537 ready for departure as soon as medical checks complete. Update destination coordinates?» Porygon 568 speaks up.

« Yes, add... 316800 seconds to the timestamp» it wouldn't do to appear again literally at the same moment he had left.

« Acknowledged.»

Oh, so 3 days and 16 hours. Feels like kinda a very specific interval to pick, but I guess that’s Turo’s attempt to make sure he shows up while it’s daylight out or something.

The woman quickly approaches him and slips the needle of the syringe into his left shoulder, the clear liquid inside entering his body. Turo grimaces for a second; something else he will have to get used to... Those "shots" as they were called were the only thing protecting his body from getting torn apart in the time machine. It was... A bit unsettling to think about actually. How did they work? No idea, he was no doctor. (… Well he technically was, but not that kind of doctor)

He pulls the sleeve of the bodysuit back up to cover his shoulder, slips back his lab coat, and steps into the time machine.

I wonder if that means that time traveling with Celebi is impossible in this setting, or if this is an artifact of the specific way that the time machines of Turo’s work.

This time he can tell that it worked before even opening his eyes. It's been a month for him, but not even a week has passed here: the same cold air, the leaves getting rustled by the wind, the stream rushing by his side. He starts following the river, listening for some tell-tale sounds of human activity. Steps, rustling of leaves, some smoke signal for a fire maybe... If Sada had been working by the river last time, she probably lived nearby.

Which you think would be more of a cause for concern for Turo, since… uh, he’s putting a lot of faith in the other humans in Sada’s neighborhood being friendly like her.

A shape in the water catches his attention: red with a big yellow dorsal fin and whiskers, it takes him a moment to recognize the silhouette of a Magikarp... It's a pretty big one, but that is nothing unusual. Lots of Pokémon were just bigger in ancient times, or one particular individual simply grew a lot more. He notices the Magikarp stop dead in the water and slightly turn in his direction. Turo pays the Pokémon no mind: they are so common even in his time that seeing one is nothing unusual, so he just keeps walking in the shallow water.

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Though I’m actually surprised that Turo didn’t know more about Pokémon life in Neolithic Kalos from studying things before making the jump. I suppose that that’s a sign that their paleontology didn’t fill in all the gaps of how ancient Pokémon behaved.

That is, until it suddenly charges at him.

He lets out a panicked yelp when the Magikarp is suddenly right by his side, teeth snapping and missing his arm only because he stumbled backwards and fell on his back.

It's the angriest looking Magikarp he's ever seen, and... Teeth? Magikarp don't have teeth! They barely have functioning muscles!

I’m just realizing now that this is a reference to Magikarp’s Y/Violet Pokédex entry “somewhat stronger”, indeed.

The shock stops him from moving for a couple of seconds; is it some prehistoric form of Magikarp? The one that was supposedly stronger than the current one?

Ah yes, there’s the explicit callback to said Pokédex entry. Though I have to wonder what sort of selection pressure caused Magikarp to go from this to the embarrassing failcarp we all know.

This is way more than a "a bit stronger", this one looked ready to bite his face clean off. Did it even need to evolve into Gyarados?

Oh, so Gyarados back in this age was just Megados, huh? Though that makes me wonder if the other Megaevos are the “default forms” of various Pokémon in Sada’s time (aside from Salamence, but I’m guessing that Roaring Moon and Megamence would be treated as one and the same).

He tries to get up to his feet, hands slipping on the stones that make up the riverbed, but the creature is much faster than him. It jumps out from the water and he desperately rolls to the side. He can feel the teeth snapping close to his head before the creature flies past him and crashes outside of the water.

And it still doesn't stop.

Turo: “I… uh… I did remember to bring Miraidon with me for this jump, right?”
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It's furiously thrashing on its side, kicking up water and gravel until it manages to turn itself right up, and the sight of it is so surreal that he can't help but stare, frozen in place, when everything suddenly clicks in his mind.

It's... It's using Splash.

Is that how the move developed? Is that what it originally was for? To chase prey even on dry land?

Oh, so it can go around on land like a Walking Catfish… lovely. Though it’s nice to see Splash actually being given a practical purpose, even if its modern usage is vestigial.

« Get down!» Sada's voice suddenly rings out from behind him and he just throws himself to the side, then stares as the woman literally chases the damn thing away with nothing but a spear and... What even was that? It looked like some kind of berry…

That’s what I’d like to know myself, actually. Since I still haven’t pegged what on earth Sada used for her Fish-B-Gone.

Anyway, she just saved his life.

He finally gets up to his feet; the bodysuit he's wearing makes sure that most of his body is still dry, but the same can't be said for his hair, hands, lab coat and-

"Shit, the time-anchor"

With a quick surge of panic he checks the device on his wrist; it should be pretty damn resistant to any kind of damage, even Pokemon moves, and really be much more durable than the person who is wearing it, but he feels pretty justified in his panic when the little device is literally the only thing keeping him tethered to his own time.

Oh, so that’s how these two are going to wind up in the “present day” in Paldea eventually, huh?

It thankfully doesn't even look wet. He notices Sada staring at his wrist and quickly hides his hand in his lab coat pocket, pointedly ignoring her little sad pout. He jumps a bit when she storms up to him, brandishing her spear.

What... What did he do? Did he accidentally end up somewhere he wasn't meant to? Was that Magikarp some kind of holy creature and she's pissed because she had to attack it to save him?

Ah yes, calling back to the Noble Pokémon from PLA. Though I wonder if it’d have made sense to have worked in an explicit nod there since… that’s more or less what Noble Pokémon were to the Diamond and Pearl Clans in PLA.

Is he going to end up stabbed in the chest after all?

He doesn't understand, but she just sighs and offers him her hand.

He takes it after a second.

All right... Looks like he has avoided "death by spear" for the moment.

So… death by Snu-Snu, then?

Though I’ll admit, this scene turned out a lot different than I was expecting it to when it’s effectively the last scene of the prior chapter, just perspective flipped and showing a few extra events at the beginning.

He's been sitting on that log for a couple of minutes now; he has tried to thank Sada for saving him, and now the girl has disappeared into the woods again. He nervously looks around, jumping at every sound. He doesn't even have Pokémon with him to protect him: even if he could get the permission to bring Miraidon with him, just pulling out a Poké Ball and using it would be... Incredibly risky.

It's considered one of the most pivotal inventions of all of human history, almost at the same level of.... The wheel, or writing. Who knows what the effect of just accidentally showing someone the idea of training Pokémon much earlier than when it was supposed to arise could do to history.

Calling it now, Turo will wind up flubbing this at some point in the story and the Not!TVA from his time will kick Sada forward a good thirteen millennia and change.

Not to mention that Miraidon would look even more out of place than he does.

I’m just casually reminded of the fact that in a book written 200 years before the present day in Violet, that there were apparently legends from heaven-knows-when of Miraidon having deep fried Paldea with electricity. I wonder if that means that we’ll wind up seeing these two sometime closer to Paldea’s Imperial Age at some point later in the story.

His eyes land on something that Sada has left behind, and he recognizes it as the notebook he has given her.

Seeing it covered in marks he scoots closer and picks it up, intrigued.

He flips it open and is left staring at the page, speechless.

He was expecting some random doodles. Maybe stick figures like the ones in cave paintings.

These are notes. A drawing that is unmistakably a map is drawn on the page, with the position of the river, the woods and what must be other peculiar spots all marked with symbols. He flips behind a couple pages, and there's stylized drawings of mushrooms, leaves, plants, even Pokemon, all marked with one or more accompanying symbols.

I can’t tell whether or not that means that writing emerged much earlier in this story’s setting than in reality, or if it’s a sign that Sada’s culture will have a critical existence failure given that there was apparently zero trace of their protowriting left behind for future generations to find.

On one of the first pages, he notices that a corner of the page seems torn up. Another corner has been dipped in water, ink all smeared.

She hasn't just been using it, she's been experimenting with it, trying out different things with this new unfamiliar material.

His heart starts pounding with excitement: this is incredible... she is incredible-

Ah yes, someone’s falling in love quite fast there. Not quite love at first sight, but still pretty close. :V

« TURO!»

He jumps like a kid caught stealing cookies from the jar right before dinner.

Sada is back, her leather pouch overflowing with what looks like random roots, plants and berries, and is staring at him with a mix of exasperation and disappointment.

She sets down her bag and mutters something under her breath, then points at the circle of stones she had set up and repeats the word she had taught him before. Was it... Something like ash? Or "fire", or.... Oh. OH.

.... She had asked him to start the fire, didn't she?

Turo: “Ha… ha… right, just getting to that.”
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He flushes with embarrassment while she keeps possibly berating him -he doesn't blame her, he deserves that-, all while skewering some mushrooms on a couple of sticks.

« S-sorry...»

Well, even if he had understood her, he had no idea how to actually start a fire.

Turo, I think that this is a sign that your preparatory research over the past month was woefully incomplete. Since this is literally a basic survival skill for going out into the wilderness.
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He tries to excuse himself by pointing at the fire and shaking his head. She stops and looks at him quizzically, seemingly pondering something. Probably how someone lacking survival skills like him is still alive.

Ah yes, so Sada’s doing this right now:

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She sits down near him, and grabs two pieces of wood from a pile near the log they've been using as a makeshift bench. The first one is flat, and looks like a little groove has been carved in it. The second one has an angled head, almost like a plow.

She slots the plow inside the groove and starts moving it up and down quickly, keeping it at an angle, then stops and offers him the two pieces of wood.

Oh. She.... She really wants him to do it himself, doesn't she?

Ah, so Sada and her tribe do this via friction instead of a flint and chunks of shed Steel-type armor or something like that. Though hey, it is very true to reality.

He starts mimicking what she had just shown him, and in not even a minute his arms already start protesting about the effort they are definitely not used to performing.

But he keeps it up, pushing through the pain, and... It does seem like it's working, smoke coming out from the friction of the movement. He had seen it done in movies, but never in real life. He honestly didn't think that a spark would come out so quickly, but suddenly there it is, a little pile of charcoal friction burned into the groove with an even tinier spark smoldering inside. Sada is quick to get a dried leaf near it, causing it to start burning, and transfers it into the campfire proper to start it proper.

I have to wonder how much you went and researched different moments for this story, since this certainly feels very on-brand as an “early humanity” thing.

Turo is left sitting there, with a huge, dumb grin slowly spreading on his face.

Sada laughs at his expression, but he doesn't mind.

He just made fire!! With his own two hands!! That's AWESOME!

Sada: “He’s going to be doing this a lot, isn’t he?”
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He had tried to refuse the food, feeling pretty bad in taking it when he had it so readily available at home, but the girl had just stared at him with a glare that... Well... Honestly had reminded him a bit of his mom when he was little and she was waiting for him to finish eating his vegetables.

There was no saying "no" to a glare like that.

Turo: “Yeah, especially since mom didn’t exactly have a spear on her when she glared at me like that back in the day.”
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While they are eating some roasted mushrooms and roots, Sada excitedly shows him the notebook. She pinches one blank page between two fingers and looks up at him with those bright, clear eyes.

« What is it?»

Reminded of the first little "game" they had played, it doesn't take him much to guess what she just asked.

« "Paper"»

Wait, but does Sada’s language even have a concept of ‘paper’ at this point? Or is he recursively introducing something like ‘papier’ to their language that if it still has any living child languages in the present day, probably sounds like some really garbled version of Basque than any Indo-European language? :copyka:

« "Paper"... » she repeats, looking back down at it. She looks conflicted, and he can almost see the thousand questions that she wants to ask, and doesn't know how. She gathers some leaves that they have been using as kindle and presses one on the page, before looking up at him again. She struggles a moment, silently mouthing a question, then speaks up again.

« Is.... "Paper"... Leaves?»

He looks at her, shocked.

Technically, no, but it's still cellulose, and she got scarily close to the right answer.

I can already see how Sada winds up becoming a Pokémon professor when her insight’s that sharp. It’s a neat take on her personality while making it fit a neolithic context.

How did she even figure that out?

« No, it's... um .. "Wood"» he stammers out after a moment, pointing to the log they've been sitting on.

Sada: “... But it isn’t hard like wood.”
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Turo: “That’s because it’s heavily processed, and- I’m going to be here all night, aren’t I?”

She stares at him for a moment, then nods, grabs her pen, and jots down another little mark on the page, a lil drawing of a tree.

... She's taking notes.

Many, many years later, Turo would look back at this scene and recognize it as the exact moment he first fell in love with her.

Turo: “I’m just going to take that as a ‘yes’.” ^///^

Well, that was certainly a ride there, and certainly picked up nicely from the last chapter. I thought that one of the highlights of the chapter was its worldbuilding, since it was nice to get a more in-depth look at the world that Turo came from. I also liked the references to real-world knowledge regarding early human life and to internal franchise lore, like they’re things that would easily get overlooked, but you wove them in in a way that felt pretty organic. The characterization was also pretty on-point in this chapter. Both Turo and Sada felt consistent with their official depictions, which is impressive given that this is an AU that departs from core elements of S/V’s backstory to run with pre-release speculation. Also, Miraidon is already a cutie from what we’ve seen of him. I’ll be looking forward to seeing more of him (and presumably Koraidon as well) later on.

I don’t have a whole lot to complain about regarding this chapter, partly because I was too busy having fun with things, but even so there were a couple things that stood out to me as flaws worth touching up. I noticed that you had a number of errors with verb tenses and typos in your prose, nothing too egregious, but still worth taking the time to spit-shine things at some point. I also noticed that some sentences and paragraphs here and there felt a bit long and unwieldy. I didn’t notice as many instances of it as in the past chapter, but that earlier advice of trying to avoid jamming too many ideas together all in one sentence or paragraph felt like it’d have cleared up the issues that I saw there.

Though good stuff, @Nekodatta . I can’t speak for what lies ahead for this story, but just what I’ve read so far does a good job at getting you sucked right into things and wanting more. I can’t vouch for how long it’ll take, but I’ll be back for at least another three of these chapters in the nearer-term, and I’ve got a feeling that I’ll be reading quite a bit more in the longer term. ^^
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, dropping back in for a bit more Timeslip before I get run over by other reviewing commitments coming due later this week:

Chapter 4

As for the dialogue tags... I'm not really sure what to do now because nobody ever mentioned it and switching them up in the middle of the story for future chapters would just confuse people as they must have gotten used to it by now. So I guess I will keep them like this...
Reading in a lot of different languages I've seen anything from "" to « to even - used to tag dialogue so I honestly never really considered it a problem as long as it was consistent in the same work, or thought about there being official rules.

So in this fic « » is for words spoken outloud, " " for direct thoughts. Since there's a lot of fumbling around and characters not understanding each other and/or learning how to pronounce words, I tried to convey it by using italics when the something said outloud was not understandable.

Huh, I actually didn’t realize that. I would actually suggest taking things a bit further and doing something like italicizing the inner thoughts to differentiate them from spoken dialogue or something like that.

The more she looked at Turo, the more the man just completely baffled her.

At first she thought that he just hadn't understood her, but... He couldn't even light a fire!

Yeah, I’m kinda baffled as to how the Not!TVA thought it was a good idea to let Turo go back without knowing that myself.

Maybe his tribe didn't use it? If he really came from the south, maybe they didn't need it for warmth? That much was obvious... But what about food? Did they eat everything raw? That didn't seem plausible.... And he hadn't looked unfamiliar with cooked food.

Oh, so Turo doesn’t eat sushi regularly back in his time, huh?

It was almost like... He had been born in the body of an adult and had none of the skill and experience that came with it. Which was impossible, unless... he had lived a very secluded life until now, someone else doing everything for him…

I mean, by her time’s standards, that’s actually not all that far removed from the truth, so…
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She had one theory about what he was, that could explain at least some of his... More strange qualities. And no, it was not "he's a spirit".

She had no way to confirm it though, not yet. She first needed to be able to talk with him better.

If it’s not too spoilery, it might make sense to allude to whatever this theory is a bit harder, or else just state it outright. Though Sada has a conception of ‘spirits’, huh? Guess it makes sense that mysticism would be a lot stronger 14,000 years ago versus Turo’s hyperfuturistic world.

[ ] So the strange writing material was called paper! And it wasn't leaves, but wood... Somehow. She examined the paper with this new information, trying to think of a way to ask Turo how it was made. Wood could be pretty flexible, so maybe by cutting it in really thin sheets...? But then how did it become so soft...? How did they its creator make every piece so perfectly even?

I think that you’re missing a step between going from “talk with him better” to “the strange writing material”. Like if Turo’s there and telling her it’s “paper”, it should be mentioned. Else have Sada do something like look down at her book to transition her thought process more explicitly to “wait, what is this stuff?”

So many questions, she had no idea where to start.

But maybe... She could try and confirm where he was from.

I’m pretty sure that the Not!TVA would explicitly forbid Turo from doing this, but… he’s in love, and love makes people do stupid things. So it’s worth a shot there.

She flips the "paper" back to the map of the area she's been drawing these last day and points first to Turo.

« You» she then draws an imaginary circle around the page, then offers the pen to the man.

« Where... Did you come from...?» she asks, pointing at various spots on the map.

Sada: “... He does understand that much of my language… right?” ^^;

He stares at the page for a couple seconds, leaving her to wonder if he got what she was trying to say. But more than perplexed, he looks... Conflicted.

Does he not want to tell her?

Maybe he doesn't even know?

Sada: “... Or on second thought, maybe he doesn’t. Sheesh, I’m gonna wind up becoming a linguist at this rate.”
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He slowly takes the writing stick from her hand and presses it, staring at the page. She notices that he holds it differently than her, daintily propped between two fingers, and then he hesitantly, slowly, he draws a little "X" shape at the bottom right of the page.

Sada tries to mask her enthusiasm. He is from the south!

Oh, so this is what’s going to wind up giving these two the idea to go to Paldea eventually, huh?

« I knew it!» she whispers, ignoring his confused blink. All right, next question... She gestures for the writing stick again, and on a blank page, draws three simple human shapes. Sada circles one and points at Turo.

« You» she then mimics walking with two fingers like he had done a couple of days ago.

« Alone? Or with people? "People"» she repeats, drawing a circle around all the stick figures together and hoping it was understandable.

[ ] Learning words from stuff you could physically point at was easy. Most abstract concepts, less so, but they could try using drawings as symbols to represent them. As long as they were understandable…

The last paragraph is long enough that IMO, you’re better off splitting everything after the “she repeats” sentence off into its own thing after adding another short sentence about Sada doing something like waiting expectantly or something like that.

At her side, she hears Turo shuffle uncomfortably for a moment, clothes crinkling slightly, before pointing to the single circled figure.

She looks up at him again - and that impossibly neatly trimmed beard looks even more weird up close, unnatural -, but he interrupts her before she can voice her next question.

« "Is”… You... “Alone"?»

He stammers a bit, his accent all wrong and weird and... Outsider-ish. But the fact that he is trying at all and that he actually picked up words that she's been using is strangely... Endearing. She's not the only one that has some questions, it seems.

Some more suggested tweaks here. Though wait, how is “direct thoughts while speaking” supposed to work again? Since I’m getting a bit thrown here by what the ‘is’ and ‘alone’ are supposed to be.

« No. My people are, umm... Here.» she draws another "X" similar to his in another corner of the map, north east to their current position. Sada waits a couple seconds, observing his reaction. He looks... Pensive.

Can’t tell if that’s supposed to be the future site of Dendemille, Anistar, or someplace completely different from both of them.

« Do you want to...?» no, too complicated.

« You... Come... With me?» she asks after a moment, pointing first in his direction, then to the little stick figures and finally on the position of her settlement on the map.

It takes a couple of seconds, but then his eyes go wide and he starts vehemently shaking his head, looking suddenly nervous.

« Oh no, absolutely not-» he mumbles.

Sada: “I’m sorry, but are people from the south all this lacking in basic survival instincts? You do realize there’s safety in numbers, right?” -_-;

Sada frowns a bit.

... She doesn't understand. Surely staying with a group of strangers is still safer than living alone? Maybe he misunderstood her?

His reaction is making her theory a lot more likely though.

Snerk. I had a feeling, even if she’s a bit nicer about it canonically.

« All right... »

Disappointed, she goes back to the first sheets of paper, and starts pointing out the various plants and mushrooms, just trying to get out as much vocabulary that could be useful as possible. It's slow going, but when they arrive to the sketches she has made of various creatures, he seems to suddenly perk up. He gestures for the writing stick and points to the first sketch, one of the big birds of prey with grey and red feathers... Not like her drawing can show it, since she had access only to one color.

Ohai, Talonflame. Though I suppose it makes sense since we’re in Kalos right now.

« It's a Fire Wing...» they were dangerous while they were hunting or if you happened to get near their nests, but she liked to look out for their fallen feathers; they were soft and incredibly warm, great to wear during the colder season by sewing them inside clothes, or as accessories. Turo nods, just the hint of a smile on his lips.

« "Talonflame"»

Ah yes, just going and recursively introducing more of modern language into the very, very distant past. Watch this turn out to be the origin of ‘Talonflame’ as a term in the present day or something like that.

Is that what it was called in his language...?

Technically, if we’re doing the ‘Kalosian’ thing to the hilt, there’s an argument to be made that it’d be ‘Flambusard’, but ‘Talonflame’ sounds better anyways, so good enough.
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Then, to her surprise, he starts sketching a Fire Wing of his own alongside hers, with a great amount of details.

A couple of strokes to draw the head, the curved beak with a sharp point and even sharper eyes... he is good at it, the picture so similar to the real thing it's like one of the creatures had been quietly sitting between them all this time, posing for reference.

I mean, there’s a nonzero chance that one of them has for Turo. If likely as a picture and not a flesh-and-blood creature.

But of course, there isn't one; he must be going from memory, not unlike her when she takes notes after some sightings.

But to be able to draw it so perfectly... He must have seen so many of them! And from really close, no less…

Turo:
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Sada: “Wait, you understood my thoughts but not my words?”
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Turo: “Noncanon space, don’t think too hard about it.”

Sada finds herself almost transfixed by the smooth movements of his hand while it flits along the page, expertly filling in the drawing. The way he moves, even how he was holding the writing stick, not a single blemish on his fingers ... It's obvious he is much more used to doing this than... Lighting a fire, or holding a weapon, or ... really any kind of manual activity.

What if Turo’s hands just weren’t meant for manual labor?
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Someone else must have done them for him all this time before now, giving him the opportunity to get that good at something not immediately useful for survival like drawing.

And there is only one role she can think of that would allow for that kind of privilege, if it was even possible.

Ah yes, Sada just going and assuming that Turo’s a Chief or a King or something like that. I can already tell this is going to lead to some hilariously awkward comedy.

Turo finishes his drawing, absentmindedly flipping the writing stick between two fingers before giving it back to her, then starts listing off the various body parts in his language. They are not immediately useful as words between them (how many times is something like "talon" going to come up in a conversation?), but she still listens attentively. They are useful to her, and he seems... Weirdly knowledgeable about these creatures.

I take it that that means that Pokémon in this setting don’t have animesque Pokémon speech given how Sada’s getting weirded out by ‘Talon’ getting repeated so many times.

« Fire Wings umm... "Move"... No...» he lifts his arms and moves them a couple of times up and down, and she has to stop herself from giggling: the white cape loudly flapping along makes him look ridiculous.

« Fly...?» she offers, only half successful in stopping a laugh from escaping her.

He blushes a bit -which is weirdly adorable - and keeps talking.

Oh, so this is the part where Sada winds up falling in love with Turo in return, huh?

« Y-yes... they "Fly" with... Fire... Umm...» there's obviously something else he wants to add, but can't explain. He sighs and palms his face.

« Of course they do, dumbass... How do I explain "fireproof"...?» he mutters to himself, lowering his hand to rub at his chin.

Oh, so that’s how you’re rendering Turo’s language through Sada’s ears. I suppose that would explain why you haven’t been using italics to render inner thoughts.

Sada stares at him for a moment, pointedly avoiding her eyes after noticing that she had been gazing at him just a bit too hard.

« "Dumbass"...?» she repeats, picking out one of the words from his muttering at random, and only because it sounded funny.

I mean, it is funny, but… :V

Turo freezes, a flash of horror on his face that quickly gets replaced by a stuttering, incredulous laugh that he tries and fails to contain.

« Wha...? No! Nononono, don'tusethatword, of all the things to pick up» he manages to get out, shaking his head but still being mostly incomprehensible.

Okay, not that Turo’s the type to pull a Rick Sanchez like from that one episode with his car battery and the civilization inside it, but you’d think that he’d be less worried about introducing a word to a language that if his world’s broad-strokes history tracks ours, will be dead and buried and highly unlikely to have any living descendants outside a couple towns in Paldea’s North Province.

Sada just stares at him, perplexed - and just a touch amused at his reaction -

« Turo, what is "dumbass"?»

His laugh only gets louder, and he can't do much except keep shaking his head, tears in his eyes.

Somewhere 14,000 years in the future, Turo’s supervisors are busy having an aneurysm in live-time.

It takes him a good couple of minutes to calm down.

... Now she really wants to know what that word means.

A “couple of minutes” feels really long for the context of a conversation, even a minute is decently long in terms of returning to a topic of conversation.

After a couple more hours, when they've exhausted speaking (or as close as they could get to speaking) about every creature in her paper sheets - or her "notebook", as Turo had called it-, the man stands up and Sada knows, before he even looks to the south, that he is going to leave.

She frowns, trying to think of a way to get him to stay; knowing him alone, in the dark, in a place unfamiliar to him... It worries her. She can't help but picture another Brutal Fang jumping out of the water to drag him away, or another hundred ways he could end up dead.

That he isn't is still baffling.

Oh, so Sada really has been doing that one Sonic meme internally all this time. :V

Maybe he knows of some special way to avoid creatures attacking him...? Not that it worked before.

Turo seems to hesitate for a moment, then gestures for the notebook.

She gives it to him, and he flips it to the first blank page. He draws a circle with some lines coming out of it.

« Sun»

Oh, so Turo’s already planning on coming back to meet his future waifu in Neolithic Kalos, huh?

All right...? He already told her how to say it in his language though...

He looks up and searches the sky for a moment before quickly drawing another half circle.

« Moon»

He circles both of them together, then looks up at her for a long moment.

« "Day"»

Yeah, I can already tell that he’s already planning on coming back. But timing his return for the next day, huh? Someone’s sure eager to keep this relationship going.

Sada looks at the drawing; a sun and a moon together form... What?

He thinks for a moment, then draws another line, this time with only half of a sun over it. An arrow pointing away from it, and a moon after that... Oh! She almost jumps a little when it hits her.

He's drawing day and night! She nods enthusiastically and he smiles, then proceeds to draw another couple of sun and moon symbols, each with arrows leading from one to the next.

« I'll come.... Here... in "three days".» he enunciates slowly circling the last couple of symbols, before giving her the notebook.

Well, a bit more than a day. Though I wonder if these sequences where Turo and Sada are teaching each other their languages is based off actual practices involving first contact with people groups, since this feels like it was very thought-out for how it’d work.

It's a sequence of days and nights... He's telling her when they can see each other again. If the first symbol is today, and there is another after that, and a couple more after than one...

He starts to slowly back away, cautiously, and Sada looks back down to the notebook, conflicted. A part of her really wants to tail him, to discover where he's going. What he is obviously hiding from her. Why he looks so reluctant at the idea of meeting other people.

Because he’d likely get into a whole heap of trouble with his bosses for tempting fate with the Butterfly Effect with all this stuff he’s been teaching you? I mean, they have been paranoid about starting any recursive timeloops from what we saw in the last chapter.

But... He did just promise to come see her again.

She doesn't want to break that trust right away.

« Three days.» she nods, and to give him proof of her good intentions, sits back down on the log.

Not fully convinced those three days are going to go by smoothly, but at least the intent’s there?

He looks a bit more relieved at that, and turns around quickening his pace.

She looks at him until he completely disappears from view amidst the trees, then closes her eyes and holds still, straining her ears.

His footsteps are still audible for the time it takes her heart to beat thirty times- then they're gone.

Wait, so did he just straight-up blip out back to the future there? Or was that the time for him to get out of audible range?

« So you've met with that strange man again? » Chalo asked, her dark raven hair clinking as the little wooden beads that decorated it rattled against each other.

I went and did a text search to make sure that I wasn’t tripping, but this is the first time ever in this story that “Chalo” is being mentioned at all. It might have made sense to take some time to describe her and where and when we are right now.

« Yes, I've actually got a theory about him now.» Sada answers, carefully following the other woman along the trail they've been walking along for a couple of hours.

She had gone back to the settlement after Turo had left: no reason to spend those three days just lazing around.

The trail was just the faintest line visible among the grassy field that extended all around them. The grass grew pretty high, tall enough to hide both a person walking upright, or most creatures. That made this area relatively dangerous: creatures couldn't see you coming, but you also had no idea of what could suddenly jump out at you.

Unless they left traces, like the one they were following. Grass flattened by a great number of creatures stepping on it, walking in an orderly line. A herd, and Sada was pretty sure she knew what kind of herd it was. That was the whole reason that Chalo had dragged her along after all: she was the only other one in their group both curious and crazy enough to go along with her ideas.

Yeah, a decent chunk of this block honestly could’ve come before or else just after Chalo’s first line of dialogue as a scene-setting thing. But the last paragraph in particular felt long enough that it should probably be two smaller ones.

« You do? Let's hear it. I still think that your mother is right and he is a spirit... But not an ancestor. A creature spirit, the ones that come out at night and can disappear in smoke.»

Oh, so that’s how they parse Ghost-types in this time, huh?

Sada lets out a sigh, crouching briefly to examine a patch of grass that looked like it had been burned.

« He is not a creature. First of all, he talks. »

« Yeah, but not our language, right? What if it's a creature using you to learn how to speak?»

I was going to go “wait, Pokémon can do that?” when I remembered that even in the games, we occasionally see the likes of an odd Zoroark managing to pick up human speech. Wonder if there’s any around where Sada’s tribe lives.

« ... That's way more ridiculous than him simply being an outsider.» Sada rolls her eyes, and Chalo simply shrugs.

« ... But it's more interesting. Anyway, your theory? » she asks again, cautiously parting the grass growing on both sides of the trail to check their surroundings.

I mean, Chalo’s not wrong there. Even if the reality behind Turo would clearly throw her in quite a loop.

Sada follows her a couple of steps behind, swiftly stepping on Chalo's footprints to reduce noise to a minimum.

« He's the shaman of his tribe. The lore-keeper... He knows so much stuff about creatures, and can draw one perfectly! He looks like he has barely travelled before now; maybe he ... Really just didn't, because his role in the group has always been to create medicine, or... Teach the children about stuff, not hunt or explore.»

Oh hey, I get to use this meme again:

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Chalo hums briefly, not convinced.

« Shamans get their role when they are are old, though. And Narjik still knows how to use a spear, not like this Terg guy-»

« Turo. And maybe in their tribe it's different, and it gets appointed at birth. » she explains enthusiastically.

Oh, so Sada does have a conception of monarchy. Or at least what we as readers from the present day would recognize as monarchy.

« It would also explain his weird clothes. They're not for traveling, they are his shaman clothes. »

Actually, that makes me wonder, how common is purple dye in this setting? Since in IRL Earth, Sada’s theory of Turo being a shaman or ruler figure would be seen as quite reasonable for her neck of the woods since purple was not an easy or cheap color to make dye of for most of history.

« All right... » Chalo stops and turns around suddenly, forcing the girl to stop walking.

« If he's so important for his tribe... What's he doing here? Alone?» she asks in a triumphant tone, but Sada just crosses her arms over her chest. What, did she think she hadn't thought of that?

Ah yes, time to make Chalo roll her eyes out of her head with this live-time spitballing. Let’s see what Sada’s got to salvage her running theory here.

« I've asked. He didn't look happy at the idea of meeting other people. I think he's been... Driven out. Forced to get away from them.»

I mean, with how many time traveling ground rules Turo’s been violating in live-time, I wouldn’t rule out this happening down the road.
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Chalo goes from looking smug to slightly worried.

« So you think he's some... Outcast? Doesn't that mean he did something bad if they banished him?»

Yeah, that... That was the part of her theory she couldn't quite explain. You had to do something pretty awful to get thrown out of your tribe and left to die in the wilderness. At least, that's what she had been told; it's not like it that had ever happened in her tribe during her lifetime.

Some small tweaks that I’d recommend here. Though that theory took a bit of a dark turn there, and one that I’m not fully convinced won’t wind up reading harsher in hindsight in like a dozen chapters.

Sada shakes her head.

« I'm sure there's another explanation. He... Does not look like the kind of person that could hurt someone else. He was shaking and completely terrified when I first approached, didn't even try to grab my spear. »

She just can't reconcile the image of the weird awkward man that blushed while fumbling for his words with that of someone that had... Killed a fellow tribesmen, or something even worse.

There was just no way.

Your middle paragraph here IMO works better being broken up into a description and a dialogue paragraph.

« Yeah, the explanation is "He's a spirit creature", just admit it!»

[ ] She laughs at Chalo's eagerness to see her theory get proven true.

« You would love it if he was, didn't you? Like in that old story... »

I feel like we’re missing something from this middle paragraph given that Sada was described as being a bit distracted in her thoughts. Maybe it’d make sense to describe her noticing Chalo’s expression or something like that.

Their little discussion gets interrupted when they arrive at their destination. The trail opens up in a little clearing, where the herd of creatures they've been following is hanging around, sleeping or grazing by nipping at the grass.

Their fur is blue, but most of the body is covered by white, soft wool. Occasionally, two of the creatures would accidentally brush on each other, sending little sparks flying with a sound similar to a crackling fire, but much sharper. In the whole herd, just two creatures were different, and obviously the leaders of the group, being slightly bigger, with pink fur and strangely less wool on their bodies.

Probably a male and his bond mate.

Oh, it’s a Mareep herd. Wonder if they’re here to hunt, or if they’re going to try and harvest wool.

Watching how the creatures changed while growing up had always fascinated Sada terribly. Why didn't humans change like that? It wasn't fair.

You do, though. It’s called ‘puberty’. :V

« Which one were you thinking about?» she asks in a whisper while scanning the herd with her eyes. Chalo quietly points at one of the smallest creatures, close to the edge of the clearing.

« I've kept an eye on them. They're not aggressive, they prefer to flee rather than fight. And this one's even calmer than the rest. He will be perfect. »

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Sada nods approvingly, then rummages in her pouch.

« You saw them eat the pink berries, right?»

« Yeah »

They creep closer to the creature by skirting around the meadow, keeping hidden in the tall grass.

Sada throws one berry near the... What even is its name?

“Thunder Fleeces”? I mean, it would fit the general naming scheme this story has been using in Sada’s time thus far…
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« What do you call them?» she whispers, observing it trot near the berry and start sniffing it.

« Is that important right now? I haven't decided!» Chalo hisses back, then holds her breath, staring at the creature with anticipation.

Oh, so it’s Chalo who’s coming up with all the neolithic names for Pokémon. Though I wonder if she’s the ‘professor’ or ‘assistant’ in this duo here.

It starts to eat the berry, and Sada throws another one to goad it into coming a bit closer.

Oh hey, I remember this from PLA. Not sure if it was a conscious callback or not, but it was nice to see.

Well it's important for her, how is she supposed to take notes about them otherwise?

They look pretty cute, but she's not sure about what they can do... Their target has just started munching on the second berry. It's so close now that she could hold a hand out and pet it, and really doesn't look like it cares much about them.

Cue the electric zapping noises in 3… 2…

Now the tricky part; she winces a moment, hoping for the best and that Chalo had gotten the right idea about these creatures.

She pulls another object out of the bag, a bright red root firmly wrapped in leaves, and after making sure that it's tightly balled up, throws it in the middle of the clearing. It makes a loud popping sound, scaring - and thankfully not enraging - the rest of the herd into taking off running.

The only one left is the smaller creature that is still eating his berry, and is only now placidly turning around to check out what the noise was.

I am not convinced that cornering a sheep that can let out electric shocks all on its own is a good idea, just saying.

It seems to realize it's been left on its own, and lets out a "meeeh".

Chalo practically shoves another berry under its mouth to distract it.

« Heeeere, you want the tasty berry? Yes? Sure you do»

She waves the fruit around taking a couple of steps backwards... And the creature seems to think about it for a moment. It looks back to where its herd was. Then to the berry in the girl's hand.

Boy is this Mareep fortunate that Sada is (probably) not here to hunt it, since that’s some really lacking survival instinct there.

And actually starts to follow her, trotting along.

Oh hey, they’re doing proto-domestication. Cute, even if I was expecting them to be doing this with Skiddo based on its Pokédex entry.

« Holy spirits, it worked!» Chalo grins and hugs her, and Sada can't help but get excited herself.

This... This is huge. If they can get it back to the settlement, they can use its wool without having to scrounge up little pieces by what they found laying around, or by actively hunting them.

Okay, between the Skiddo ‘dex entry and how you two are already counting your chickens, I’m expecting this to wind up crashing and burning once the rest of the herd comes back in like five seconds.

If they could get another of the opposite sex, maybe they could even start an herd of their own!

There's just one last thing to decide.

« ... What do we call it?»

Thunder Fleeces?

In the end, they name the creatures Spark Tail, after noticing its tail lighting up. Well, Chalo actually wanted to call them "Fluffyhead", but Sada had refused.

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I wonder how many dippy-sounding names like that Sada has vetoed through the ages.

« You can call this one Fluffyhead, but I'm not going to refer to this things with such a silly name»

« But look at how fluffy it is! And why? Are you afraid Terg will laugh at you? He won't even know what it means.»

« It's Turo, and.... That's not it.» she grumbles, watching the Spark Tail chew on some grass right outside her tent.

Just saying, you probably don’t want to keep the prey creature right outside your tent without anything else protecting it when thar be monsters in the woods that would be tempted to come and make a snack of it, Sada.

It's just that she wanted it to sound... Proper. She keeps staring at the creature that, admittedly, was pretty fluffy - just not enough to deserve naming it after that singular characteristic. How silly would that be?

As long as it had food, it really didn't seem to mind being apart from his herd, or being surrounded by humans. They hadn't even needed to build some enclosure for him, just made sure to keep it away from furs and other things that could catch fire brushing against the sparks that came out of his wool.

What a simple, peaceful life it was leading.

Just saying, I’m pretty sure that this is tempting fate in live-time, Sada. Since this is the sort of thing that you say right before a Noivern swoops in later that night and carries Fluffyhead off.

The kids already loved it, and Narjik was trying to figure out a way to trim its wool without getting hurt. She would love to help with it -it was something new to do, a new problem to solve-, but she had to get going if she wanted to reach the meeting point with Turo in time.

Can’t tell if Sada is legitimately introducing Pokémon domestication to the world (even if she’s about 3000 off relative to reality for domesticating sheep), or if this is a sign that something is going to wind up happening to her tribe to snuff out these more anachronistic features.

She arrives at the camp at sunset, and to her surprise, finds it already set up. The fire is crackling, not strongly admittedly, but there is a certain skill in feeding a fire and keeping it going that the man Turo obviously seemed to lack, so the fact that he managed to get it started at all after apparently having it done only once before was impressive. Turo The man himself is sitting cross-legged near the fire in his usual clothes, a second notebook and writing stick of his own propped up on his knee, intent on drawing or writing something on the page.

IMO, the “Turo” and “The man” in this paragraph work better swapped in positions, since at first I thought Sada went back to her tribe’s camp when I saw “the man” there.

Something looks off about him(or... More than usual), and it takes her a moment to consciously realize what it is.

It's only been three days. His facial hair should not be that long.

I actually didn’t realize that Turo didn’t come to Past!Kalos without his trademark Gigachad beard prior to this point. Though I suppose that’s a sign that he’s been back in the future for like a month or so.

She blinks, trying to decide if it's just her mind playing tricks on her and she's misremembering how long it was that Turo told her they’d meet again three days ago, or if it's just another weird thing to add to the growing list of strange things about Turo.

Probably the latter, she decides with an almost resigned shrug.

Sada: “Southern people are weird. Though why haven’t I heard about this at all from the others in the tribe?” .-.

Turo looks up at her approach, just a twinge of fear crossing his expression before he relaxes, recognizing her. He raises his free hand and waves it in midair.

« "Hi" »

Sada timidly repeats the gesture and word, not quite sure what to make of it. A greeting? Or some kind of ritual?

Maybe a way to show that he was unarmed, like during their first meeting?

Sada: “Yeah, in retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have brandished my spear at him back then, huh? (Even if I didn’t expect him to be this jumpy about it.)” ^^;

It seems to be the right thing to do in any case, because he smiles and gets up, closing his notebook and slipping it into his robes before she can so much as catch a glimpse of it - to her disappointment, she kind of wanted to know what he was drawing.

« You... walk... With me?» he mimes the by now usual gesture, surprising her again.

Walk? Right now with the sun setting?

Sada: “Spirits, does this man have a death wish or something? How is he this bad at staying alive?”
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Sada nods and stops just a moment to better tie the spear slung over her back, then grabs a piece of wood from the fire to use as a torch. She glances at him while they walk away from the camp; he's got both hands hidden in his mantle, head moving left and right while he seems to be scanning the trees looking for something.

« What...?» she starts to ask, and he turns back to look at her with a small smile.

« Fire Wing feathers. »

It takes a moment to recognize what "feathers" meant, before she remembers his portrait of the creature. Why is he so interested in them now? Unless…

Sada: “Okay, seriously, we need to have a talk about why you seem to have a knack for always putting yourself in danger and being blissfully unaware about it.” >_>;

« Are you.... Cold?» she mimes some shivering, and after a moment of hesitation, he quietly nods, looking a bit frustrated.

Sada grimaces, mentally berating herself. Of course he must be cold, not being used to living in this area. She starts to actively look for the feathers, while the obvious question of "how didn't he freeze to death the night before our meeting?" keeps nagging at her.

Yeeeeeeah, Turo really needed to take some survival skill courses before going back to Neolithic Kalos, especially with how he almost got eaten by a fish last time.

Maybe he had something else from a creature with the power of fire with him these days, and it has now lost its effect. She shuffles a bit closer to him, raising the torch, and he gives her a little smile noticing the gesture.

Okay, so I’ve noticed it a few times now in this chapter and in earlier ones, but I figured that I might as well give a reminder that “its” and “it’s” are not interchangeable. “its” is the possessive of “it”, while “it’s” very specifically means “it is”. I assume that that’s not an issue in more recent chapters, but figured I’d just make sure.

They find some feathers, but they are obviously not the ones they are looking for: much bigger, mostly white with a blue purple base. It's not the first feathers of that kind that she sees around here, but she still hasn't been able to spot the creature they belong to.

… Wait, are those Koraidon feathers, or…?

Turo also seems intrigued by them, getting down on one knee to pick one up. His free hand goes to his neck, where his strangely smooth purple clothes start.

They seem to cling so tightly to Turo's body that, when he hooks one finger around the fabric and pulls it down slightly, it almost looks like he's pulling away a weird layer of purple skin.

Is Turo going to have a “stupid sexy Flanders” moment here? Since his attire sure seems to be hugging his body tightly. :P

It looks creepy enough to distract her for a moment from what he is actually doing, namely pulling out an object hanging from his neck that was obviously hidden under his clothes.

Sada lets out a little gasp and points at it.

« My necklace!»

Oh, so Sada did give Turo that tooth necklace that’s part of her official design… I think.

He nods, looking a bit embarrassed, then holds up the necklace still looped around his neck in one hand and the feather in the other. Some of the smaller feathers used in the necklace have the exact same shade of blue.

Sada gets a bit closer, keeping the torch at arm's length.

They could be from the same creature... And as far as she can remember, there are no flying creatures around with bright blue feathers.

Okay, yeah, they’re Koraidon feathers. The description matches with the official art, and Sada is very specifically precluding it from being a bird’s feathers.

« What is it?» Turo asks, probably his way of asking what creature it came from.

Sada shakes her head.

« I don't know.»

That actually makes me wonder how Turo is going to react to seeing Koraidon for the first time and if his mind will instantly go to Miraidon or Cyclizar as the reflexive point of comparison.

He looks disappointed, and slips the feather he has found in his mantle, and the necklace back under his clothes.

They keep looking for a while, but the sun having set completely in the meantime forces them to stop. Wandering around in the dark is way too dangerous; the torch is now their only source of light, complete darkness pressing against them all around otherwise.

Sada: “Yeah, in retrospect, I should’ve made more of a fuss about Turo keeping us out late like this.” >_>;

Actually, not really the only source: Turo's purple clothes seem to glow slightly in the dark.

She stares at them for a second while he notices and ties his mantle closed, slightly embarrassed. Those have to be the most useless and backwards clothes she's ever seen.

Ah yes, Turo’s going to get all the citations and demerits from his bosses back in the future. Though I’m surprised that they let him go back to an era like this with glow-in-the-dark clothing.

Noticing that Turo seems to glance around nervously, she grabs his hand and guides him by walking ahead.

Or at least tries to, because his hand almost seems to squirm away from the contact, and then he suddenly stops. She turns around, only to find him with his head held high, eyes fixed to the night sky.

And an expression of almost child-like wonder on his face.

Sada: “Is the place that you come from not like this? Since you’re sure geeking out a lot over a normal forest.”
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Turo: “... Something like that, yes.” ^^;

She raises her eyes to the sky as well. The moon has almost completely disappeared that night, leaving only the myriad tiny lights in the sky to shine. She's always wondered what they are; some are bigger, some smaller, some look like they are twinkling, like really small distant fires, high up in the sky.

Who's lighting those fires? Some creature, flying up in the sky at night? Maybe other people, living really, really far away?

That moment when Sada is at once really close, and really, really far away from identifying how a star works. I kinda get that it’s a running trend for her when parsing things she has no frame of reference for.

Turo is looking at the sky like someone who is seeing it for the first time in his life; he resumes walking, slowly, but keeps glancing up, and barely avoids stumbling to the ground a couple of times, smiling all the while.

So Turo’s night sky is a light polluted haze in the future, I assume. Since this feels a lot like how I reacted the first time seeing the stars in the countryside and noticing just how many more of them were visible versus in the suburb where I grew up.

It's both adorable and heartbreaking at the same time; were they... really keeping him secluded somewhere his whole life?

More like the time and place he came from is a hellscape of concrete and asphalt where there’s no nature outside of specific parks and reserves.

Maybe he wasn't banished from his tribe. Maybe he escaped.

I mean, I’m kinda half-expecting that Turo is going to get banished from his time at this rate. Especially with how many cardinal sins of time travel he’s been committing in just these four chapters. [copyka]

Maybe he's terrified of meeting other people because he's afraid of getting locked up again.

Okay, now I’m curious as to just how much hot water Turo got into from the events of the last chapter. Since he definitely seems to be a bit more mindful of potentially impacting the past this time around.

Her theory only sounds more plausible when they get back to the camp, and she insists on giving him some of her pelts to sleep in.

He looks incredibly nervous as they settle down on opposite sides of the fire.

She can hear him turn around, unable to sleep, long into the night, until she herself finally falls asleep.

He's gone come morning, but there is a piece of paper torn from his notebook left near her when she wakes up, with two day and night symbols drawn on it.

Yeeeeah, I’m not convinced Sada isn’t going to be moody about this next time.

Alright, made it to the end. Your story has a bit of a fun shtick going on with the way that it constantly flips between Turo and Sada’s perspectives each chapter. I don’t know if it’ll remain like this consistently through its run, but it goes a long way to making things feel different going from chapter to chapter. The main highlight of this chapter was getting to see Sada at work as a proto-professor, and the way that she applies her curiosity and deduction towards trying to better understand her world and Turo. It does make me wonder how she’s going to react when the shoe drops and she gets to see a bit more of technology from beyond her time, but I suspect that we’ll be getting to that point pretty quick from here.

I honestly don’t have that much to complain about the chapter. It’s still in its slow-paced phase, but things seem to be building up quite nicely. I did notice that you had some minor typos riddled in your text that you should probably take some time to even out. There were also a couple paragraphs that I thought were long and unwieldy enough to work better as a couple smaller ones (in particular ones that combined dialogue and multiple sentences of narration). There’s probably a few more issues that are reflected in the full line-by-line, but honestly, I was too busy having fun for them to get in the way that much.

Hope the feedback was helpful @Nekodatta , and I honestly regret taking so long to come back to this story. It’s got some good stuff in there and does a good job meshing two characters from wildly different worlds. I’ll be looking forward to when the bike dragons come onto the scene, since based off this chapter, it sounds like we won’t have to wait too much longer to see Koraidon’s first appearance. ^^
 
Chapter 33: Our Treasure, part III New

Nekodatta

Pokémon Trainer
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. koraidon-apex
  2. miraidon-ultimate
  3. skitty
Chapter 33: Our Treasure, part III
During their first weekend after the last Tera raid, both she and Turo had decided to come back to the Cabo Poco lighthouse to have a better look at the house and see if it could also work as a laboratory for both of them. It was divided mostly into two areas. The first part was directly under the lighthouse itself and was little more than a single room. Rusted tools and books about sailing implied it had been little more than a deposit for whatever was needed to operate the lighthouse.
This could easily become their shared laboratory in the future. The second part was the house proper, built right behind it.


« We will need water and electricity to get activated again... and gas to cook, I guess.» Turo said after going inside. It was a very spacious room; the previous owner had left only an old sink and a couple of cabinets, but it was probably supposed to act as a living room with an open kitchen.


Sada opened one cabinet to peer inside, finding nothing but old, rusted pots. Right. Cooking. She had gotten so used to having lunch at the Academy or directly outside while camping around Paldea that she hadn't considered having to cook her own meals once she graduated.
Just one more thing she had to learn...
The rest of the rooms were pretty much the standard for this time.
One bathroom. One bedroom. A bit small, but she was used to sleeping in cramped spaces... and she and Turo had already shared even smaller beds, be it in their respective dormitory rooms or the bunk beds in Area Zero.


And... there was another room. Probably a small office, judging by diaries that logged how many and which kind of ships had passed by. Mostly unused. Clavell had also decided to accompain them, and was busy examining the windows and walls for traces of mold. The older man had looked incredibly excited at the news of both the marriage and her pregnancy, and seemed to have taken it upon himself to, especially for the latter, make sure they had literally everything they could possibly need.


Sada didn't have the heart to tell him that she found at least half of the things he had compiled into a big list completely useless. Like ... a "baby bath thermometer" , because apparently using your hand to check wasn't good enough.
Some where much more sensible, like a baby crib, or a stroller, and even if a part of her kept thinking that she had survived just fine with none of those things, another wanted her future child to not have to experience doing so.


Sada had to admit, however, that one thing in particular puzzled her.


« "Clothes"? Why do I have to buy clothes for the baby?» she asked, thumbing through a magazine she had bought the day before.


Clavell's eyes widened, and she hurried to explain, least he think that her intention was to let the baby just be naked.


« I was just going to sew some... I could easily scale them as the child grows, it's so easy...»


Clavell seemed to struggle to answer for a moment, while Turo closed the logbook he had been reading to come look at the magazine over her shoulder.


« "Size XS"...? You mean... those things just don't adapt to the kid's body...?» he wondered, and Sada nodded.


Clavell looked a bit lost.


« I don't think so...? But Turo... don't tell me people in the future just wear another weird stretchy suit their whole childhood-» Clavell said in a slightly exasperated tone, to which Turo shrugged.


« Sure...? I had different models growing up of course, but for the first few years, why would you even bother having sizes? Kids grow stupid fast at that age, and I could just personalize it anyway-»


« Yeah! It makes no sense! » Sada argued, « "Age 0-3 months"? The baby will probably wear most of this stuff once!» and it was so expensive! Wasn't it better to use that money for more essential stuff that would last the baby longer?


« Yes, but... how do I put it... I'm sure you don't mean it in a bad way, but... » Clavell looked like he was clearly struggling.
« It's going to look a bit... "weird" to people here if the baby has nothing but homemade clothes, even if it's probably the most logical and sensible thing.» Clavell said, in a tone that suggested he was trying to be as delicate as possible.


Sada's shoulders slumped.
Oh.
... she thought it was a good idea. It made sense to her. It was practical, and how she had grown up after all. She had watched most of the children in her tribe get born, and the months before the birth it wasn't uncommon to see other people of the tribe work together to make sure the child had blankets and clothes ready, especially during winter.


It... It was something she had often wondered how it would feel like when and if it would be her turn to do.
It was something special. Important.
But... here it would make her child look bad?
She didn't want that.


« I see... guess we'll... Have to buy a bit of everything then...»


A heavy silence hung in the room, interrupted only by a small flock of Squawkabilly flying by outside the window, chattering loudly.
Turo put one hand on her shoulder and she gave him a little smile.


« On the other hand, consider this.» Clavell cleared his throat and, after a moment, turned the magazine in her hands to a specific page.


« Those outfits are incredibly cute


Sada blinked, looking down at the glossy photograph. So what if they were cute? Clothes were supposed to keep you protected and warm, that's it! Cuteness came after not being cold and exposed to the elements, and... and... uh...


« Is .. is that a little Fidough onesie? With little ears?» she whispered after a long moment.


« ... With a little adorable coordinated Dachsbun jacket.» Clavell nodded as he turned to another page.


« So it looks like Fidough evolved.... » Turo also whispered. His face was impassible as always, but his eyes were shining. Sada was pretty sure that he was restraining himself from squeeing from the adorableness.


« ... All right, so they aren't that bad. I still want to make some socks or hats for him or her.» she mumbled, snapping the magazine shut and regarding it with some suspicion.


That thing was dangerous. The less adorably cute little jackets and pajamas and itty bitty shoes she saw, the better.


« Let's make a list of everything we need.» she added, looking around.


« ... And clean up this place, first.»
---
"It is undeniable that humans play an active part in Pokémon evolution: certain species that rarely evolve in the wild or who's condition to evolve are heavily tied to their environment are getting more and more alternative methods of evolution by artificial substitutes made available by human technology.
Let's use the Pokémon Magmar as an example: in the wild, only the toughest members of the species, who are able to claim the hottest and most dangerous parts of active volcanoes as their territory are able to evolve into Magmortar."



Turo's hands had been flying over the keyboard, but now he stopped suddenly, furrowing both eyebrows.


« Um... Jacq?» he raised his voice towards the other researcher, who was practically hunched over his own laptop. The man's hexagonal glasses peered over the screen.


« Yeah?»


« How many times does Magby evolve?» he asked, just to make sure.


Before Pokémon adapted to Hadron Energy, it seemed like new evolution methods kept being discovered left and right during this era. It was difficult for him to keep track of them all and make sure to not blurt out stuff that hadn't been discovered yet.


« Two, as far as we know... Naturally growing up and through extreme heat... Or a Magmarizer.»


All right, good. So they had been invented already. He mumbled a "thanks" and resumed writing.


"This means that usually, an extremely low number of these Pokémon is expected to live in a specific environment, and of course, any trainer that wanted to let their Magmar evolve would have to go through great trouble to do so. The invention of the Magmarizer, a device that briefly simulates the environmental conditions necessary anywhere and at any time, now trivialized access to them. Magmar belonging to trainers can evolve when they want, as long as their trainer can afford one of these devices. Evolution has changed from something that the Pokémon achieved by themselves to something that can be bestowed to them by technology. In this paper, I want to examine many more examples of human influence on the development of Pokémon, and what the implications of this could be, even centuries in the future-"


After getting over the annoyance of not being able to summon a monitor and keyboard whenever he wanted with a snap of his fingers, he had to admit that he was growing fond of these mechanical keyboards. There was something viscerally satisfying on hearing the constant clack - clack- clack of the keys. It felt good.
He kept writing, until he noticed that Jacq had stopped writing and was peering at him over his own monitor again.


« .... what?» he asked in a flat tone. Jacq flinched slightly, then laughed in a strangely embarrassed tone.


« Nothing, I... was just thinking about you getting married... and...» he started.


Turo's writing barely slowed down.


« You're invited, of course.» he mumbled, figuring that was what he was getting at.


« Really?!» Jacq smiled, sounding genuinely happy, and Turo found himself a bit embarrassed.


« ... It's not like there's going to be that many people anyway. You... Clavell... Raifort... some other classmates, I guess... » he added. It took him a couple of seconds to notice that Jacq was still staring at him.


« ... what?» he asked again, and Jacq sighed, squirming in his chair.


« Nothing. I... was wondering why you never brought up your family. Is it really going to be only us from the Academy?» he asked.


Turo flinched, his fingers freezing up on the keyboard. He was expecting that question sooner or later, but he was hoping to avoid it just a bit longer.


« ... Yeah. Me and Sada want something small and private.» he answered, hoping that it was enough to tell Jacq not to insist. Unfortunately, Jacq seemed to not have gotten the hint.


« So... you two are not on great terms with your families...? » he asked quietly.


Turo swallowed, now looking away from the monitor. He grit his teeth, a heavy lump in his throat.


« ... Yeah, exactly.»


He tried not to think about his relatives too much, because it hurt. He had never quite thought about getting married in his time, but now that he was actually planning a wedding (or, to be more exact, getting pestered by Clavell about how the planning was going) he couldn't help but think about how things would have gone.


To follow tradition, he would have gotten married on the Moon, probably.
He would have acted all grumbly, but would have secretly enjoyed the ceremony, half floating in the low gravity.
Relatives would have come from all over, even Mars, and he would have watched the Sun rise over the Earth from the Moon's surface like it was customary, symbolically watching the first dawn together with his wife- and there the fantasy screeched to a halt, because he couldn't picture anyone that wasn't Sada in her place now.


« Just us. » he repeated. He still felt Jacq's eyes on him, and could almost sense the mix of curiosity and pity that radiated off the younger man. Turo smiled , darkly amused at the situation. He could imagine what the other was thinking: did they both really not have anyone else? Not a single relative? A friend? No one?


If only he knew.


« I'm going to take a break in the cafeteria.» he announced, standing up as he put his computer in sleep mode.
Jacq simply nodded and went back to work, but he still felt his eyes on him even as he left the room, closing the door of the laboratory after him.


It was early afternoon, and the cafeteria was full of both students and teachers. He grabbed a sandwich for himself and another for Miguel, letting both of his Pokémon out of their Poke' Balls. The Dark type looked half-asleep, probably caught midnap, while the Magnemite started bopping up and down around his chair as he started eating.


« Sorry for not letting you out earlier, but I've heard that Magnemite and machinery don't get along.» he said to the steel type as he offered his Pokénav battery to drain.


« I can't have you accidentally turning off my computer or corrupting some data in it.» he added, watching the Pokémon lazily close its single eye as it started "eating".
He looked at both of his Pokémon as he bit into the sandwich with little enthusiasm. He was waiting to get clearance for that Porygon, but even with that, he felt like he still needed something else on his team. Both Miguel and Ampere were starting to struggle against Gym Leaders. He had barely been able to beat Larry, not because his Pokémon weren't good enough, but for simple numerical disadvantage.


Sada also had only two Pokémon - soon three-, but he was aware that the members of his team shared a problem that Sada's team didn't have: they both needed stones or something particular to evolve... if they even wanted to.


For Ampere, the Magnemite needed to hang out with other Magnemites until it found two others that resonated with it enough to join together... Which was cool, but didn't that mean that he needed to catch more Magnemite? They were found around Levincia in Paldea, if he remembered right... as for Miguel...


« Where do you even find a Dusk stone...?» he wondered, watching the Murkrow peck at his sandwich.


« Well... I could help with that.»


Turo frowned as he heard Raifort's voice come from behind him. He turned around, only to see the woman sitting at the table behind him.


« How come?» he asked. Raifort smiled, got up, and without even asking for permission, plopped herself down in the seat in front of him.


« I've found a couple while exploring ruins around Paldea. My Pokémon don't need them, so... I could give you one.» she suggested, in a tone that implied that she obviously wasn't doing it out of the goodness of her heart.


He sighed; he wasn't really in the mood for dealing with Raifort right now.


« What do you want in return?» he asked, lounging back against the chair's backrest and crossing both arms to his chest. Out of the corner of one eye, he saw that Murkrow had stopped eating to eye Raifort's many accessories with a dangerous glint in his red eyes. It wouldn't be the first time he had attacked a fellow student or passerby to try and steal a hairclip or ring.
For a moment, he was almost tempted to just let him do it.


« ... Miguel, no» he muttered, and the crow Pokémon clicked his beak and went back to his food.


« I want you to promise me one thing.» Raifort said after a moment, voice low as she leaned forward on the table. Turo simply raised one eyebrow, waiting for her to continue talking.


She did so after a moment, her lips pursed in a scowl.


« ... I can't stand you, you know. » she hissed.


« What a surprise.» Turo replied in a monotone. Raifort's scowl only intensified.


« You embody all I despise more than anything: those idiots that don't give a shit about history and only care for progress, progress, "progress"! You spent half of our history course sleeping in class!» she sounded exasperated, and he huffed in amusement. He had only done so because he had already studied those things -


« So what if I did? I still got into the top five of our class... I think I even beat you in the part of the course about the Paleolithic -» he couldn't restrain himself from pointing out with a satisfied smirk when her eyes flashed in anger.


Oh yeah, she was pissed. The fact that he of all people seemed to know history (even if only a small part of it, and for reasons she could never even imagine) better than her had to sting quite a bit.


« I just don't understand what Sada sees in you.» she continued.


« You have completely opposite interests, you have nothing in common, and yet... and yet she looks at you like you're the center of her whole world and nothing or no one else exist. You're her anchor, and... and I just don't understand why.» she said, lowering her eyes, frustrated.


Turo kept silent for a long moment, eyes low.


« ... You don't know anything about us. We've got more in common than you could ever imagine.» he said in a monotone, uncrossing his arms and leaning forward on the table towards the woman.


Raifort didn't answer at that, but he noticed that she had balled up her fists on the table.


« ... right. Of course. Like that weird "Kalosian dialect" you two speak? Whatever you say. » she whispered, before shaking her head. She looked back up, and he actually leaned back a little at the glare she directed at him.


« Just promise me that you will make her happy. For whatever reason, she loves you. If you do anything to make her unhappy, or if this marriage doesn't work out...»


Right now Turo realized that Raifort probably didn't care about giving him or not the Dusk Stone. It was just an excuse so they could pretend that they were each getting something out of the deal.


For a moment , he felt kind of offended that she was even just suggesting he would do it for something as trivial as an evolutionary stone, even if only as a paper thin excuse.


« It will. You don't have to worry about that. I love her... we only have each other in more ways that you can imagine. That won't ever change.» he said.


Raifort seemed to look at him in search of a sign that he was lying.


« I see. » she said after a long moment of silence, before nodding.


« Then... let's say we have a deal.»


Raifort offered him her hand, and he shook it. Judging from how she gripped his hand, she was trying to pulverize every bone in it.


« So... does that mean we're going to stop the silly rivalry from now on?» he asked, watching the woman get up and grab her bags. She turned to glare at him, but now he could see her lips turn ever so slightly upwards in a smirk.


« Of course not. I still despise you. » she said, walking away.


He grinned. « Good. Let's see who will get their research published first, then.»


---


After a couple weeks they had cleared away most of the dust and old, unusable furniture from the lighthouse. Now, before they could refurnish the house, they needed to first give a fresh coat of paint to every room. Sada found it quite fun to do, even if it was just white paint. But for certain rooms of the house, they wanted to do something different.


« I want the baby's bedroom to be orange!» she huffed, crossing her arms as she and Turo had both brought a can of paint of a different colour.


« What? But that will look horrible! We can make the kitchen orange. Violet is much better for a bedroom!» Turo answered.


« But I like orange... maybe not bright orange... but we could use a warm, earthly orange. I find it reassuring...» she said, looking around the empty room and trying to picture it. Turo did the same, and he smiled a little.


« ... I see. It reminds you of the interior of the tents back home, right? All those orange and light brown pelts.» he said, and she nodded, happy that he had understood her immediately.


« You've fallen asleep in those tents more than one time. It was cozy, wasn't it?» she asked, and he nodded after a moment, with just a little reluctance.


« It was. I was honestly surprised at how safe I felt there. A Pokémon could have attacked any time, in theory, and yet... it never crossed my mind, back then.» he whispered.


Walking to the center of the room, Sada sat down, cross-legged, looking up at the empty walls and trying to picture what the room would look like soon.


« ... In just a couple of months, we will live here. Together. It... It still doesn't feel real, does it? » she said after a moment of silence. Turo copied her, sitting down in the same position at her side with a little grumble and quite less grace.


« I hate the clothes of this era so much, why do they have to be so rigid-» he said, making her smile. She grabbed his left hand with her right and held them between them, resting on his knee.


« I don't mind them... but I wish a lot of them had more pockets. Why do pockets just straight up go extinct in the future? Your suit also doesn't have any. » Sada replied, prompting Turo to bark out a short laugh.


« Right... no idea. Maybe it's all a big conspiracy to sell more trainer bags and backpacks. » he joked.


He took a sharp breath.


« But yeah... it still doesn't feel real sometimes. »


There was a moment where they both simply stood in silence, just enjoying the other's presence. It reminded her of all the times when it had been just the two of them, sitting in a cave or a clearing as somewhere, teaching each other different words... with all that had happened and always being surrounded by so many people in the Academy, they usually didn't have that much time just for the two of them.


« Why do you want to paint the room violet?» she asked after a moment.


« Darker colours are better for a place where you have to sleep, they're more calming.» he said. She tilted her head, looking at him; he was staring at the ceiling with a pensive look.


« Um... but, at night, wouldn't the whole room be dark anyway?» she pointed out. « There's another reason, isn't it?»


Turo smiled at that, humming a bit.


« Umm... yes, actually. That's what my room used to look like as a kid. Very dark purple,and... we had this ceiling with screens that showed the stars, and constellations... I wanted to make something similar.» he whispered after a bit. She smiled, drawing little circles on his hand with her thumb.


She looked at the still grey wall, pondering. They wanted two diametrically opposite colors for different reasons, but...


« ... I think I have an idea of what to do.» she added, whispering it in his ear.
---
A couple of hours later, they were done with painting the room, and Turo stepped back to admire their work, completely exhausted but satisfied.


At the very bottom of the wall until roughly halfway up, it was painted in a mixture of orange and reds, warm colours that resembled the sky at sunset, blending seamlessly with the floor covered in wooden boards. Near the ceiling, the orange paint slowly got darker and darker until it transitioned to various shades of violet, until it got so dark it was almost indistinguishable from black.


Turo couldn't help but feel a little nostalgic as he looked at the ceiling. He would paint a star chart on the ceiling little by little, in the next few months. For now, he was completely exhausted, but there was one last thing he wanted to do.


He walked to the bucket of violet paint still left, and after throwing a meaningful look to Sada, dunked his whole left hand in it.


Her eyes widened, first in confusion, then in recognition. She wordlessly stepped by his side and did the same thing with her own bucket of paint.


Together, they pressed their hands against the wall, side by side, leaving two handprints in bright, shining paint.
Their own little personal family tree, just like she had back home.


« ... We should have used berry juice to be more authentic.» Sada whispered after a moment of silence. He heard her sniffle, and noticed that her eyes had gotten a bit damp, but she was smiling.


They sat back down again, this time letting out all of their Pokémon as they caught their breath.


He watched Ampere float upwards to examine the lightbulb mounted on the ceiling, while Miguel perched on his shoulder, looking around. The Murkrow looked confused by his surroundings, and cawed a silent question as he pecked at his earlobe.


« This is our new home.» he explained, stroking his glossy black feathers with one fingertip. Miguel didn't look impressed, glaring at him with half closed eyes, and he chuckled.


« Well, it will be. We'll all live here together... Me,Sada, you all...» he paused for a moment « ... and our new treasure.» he finished with a whisper.
Miguel jumped down from his shoulder with a flutter of wings, both eyes now wide and glinting in mischief.


« Treasure! Treasure!» he cawed, flapping his wings, and Turo had to laugh when he realised the kind of treasure the Dark type was probably thinking about.


« It's... not that.» he said with a small smile.
By Sada's side, he saw that Kim's ears had perked up, and she hissed towards Miguel. The dark type threw her an irritated look, at least until the Litleo, purring, slowly curled up against Sada's side again, right next to her stomach, and meowled. The Murkrow shut up, tilted his head sideways, then flapped over to Sada's side to stare at her intently.


« Treasure? Nest?» he cawed, looking at both the woman and the Litleo.


Sada seemed speechless.
« Kim... wait. Turo... you think she understands I'm...?» Sada whispered, her eyes widening as she turned slightly towards him. Kim's purring only intensified as she gently brushed Sada's side with her tail.


« Why wouldn't she? They have amazing senses; I wouldn't be surprised if she knew it before you did.» he answered, watching the two Pokémon crowd around her.


Ötzi stopped examining the only window in the room and turned towards the scene, waddling over after a moment. Even Ampere floated closer, even if those two seemed to be the most confused of all four Pokémon.


Turo guessed it made sense: Litleo and Murkrow lived in prides and huge flocks respectively. They would be familiar with raising their young and to place a great deal of importance on it. The other two... He honestly had no idea if the concept was even familiar to Pokémon like Ampere.


They both watched curiously as the Pokémon seemed to exchange a series of chirps, hisses or, in the Magnemite's case, slight buzzes of electricity with each other. Turo had often wondered how much Pokémon from completely different species could even understand between each other. He had always thought that Pokémon with completely different body language or methods of communicating would find it impossible... but he now realized that it probably wasn't that much different than a human learning to interpret each of his Pokémon's signals. Spending a lot of time together as part of a trainer's team probably helped.


It looked like Miguel and Kim were trying to explain something to the other two, who didn't seem to get it. The Golett just tilted his head, then got closer to Sada with uncertain steps. Sada smiled and stroked the Pokémon's arm.


« Soon, there will be someone else living with us, Ötzi.» she explained.


The Golett seemed to understand that a little bit more.


« A completely new person! You will help me watch over them, will you?»


That seemed to excite the Golett, because it raised both of his arms into the air and whistled a short tone, the energy coursing through his body making his eyes glow brighter.


Sada laughed and pet the Pokémon on the arm; meanwhile, Ampere still looked between her and Turo like he wasn't sure of what he was supposed to be excited about.


« Treasure! Family! Treasure!»


Spreading his wings, the Murkrow fluttered over towards the buckets of paint still half opened. Surprising everyone, he knocked the lid over with his beak and dunked one of his feet into the paint.


« W-what are you doing?!» Turo jumped up, fumbling to grab Miguel's Pokeball, but before he could stop him, the Murkrow had already flown near his hand print and, dripping violet paint, had pressed his talons against the wall, leaving an imprint of his footmark on it.


« Mreow!» Kim ran near him to do the same, dunking one paw in Sada's red paint and pressing it underneath Sada's own handprint. Ötzi and Ampere followed soon after, the Golett leaving a big handprint near the Litleo's while the Magnemite hesitantly tipped one of its magnets inside the paint and then at the wall.


Turo sat back down, stunned, while both their Pokémon crowded back around them. A quick glance towards Sada showed him that her eyes were glinting with tears; his own felt quite damp as well and he looked hastily away to hide it.


He hadn't really thought about what his Pokémon would think of the baby, but...


« You'll all make a wonderful family...» Sada whispered, her voice cracking after a moment. Kim approached her and she hugged the Litleo, hiding her face in the warm fur. A moment later, she gasped.


« I think... I think the baby just kicked.» she whispered, eyes widening.


Turo looked at her.


« Was this the first time you felt it?» his voice was barely a whisper, almost like he was afraid of disturbing the little presence between them.


« Yes...» she smiled, looking down.


« Hi... everyone is here to welcome you, see?» she whispered.


Not everyone -


For once, he stopped the thought halfway, before thinking of Mirai and everyone else he knew could ruin this moment. Turo slowly put his hand on Sada's belly, hoping to hear the same movement again.


They stood side by side like that, their precious treasure surrounded by their new family, long after the sun had set, just enjoying that moment.

I've been googling so much stuff about pregnancies and wedding preparations, I expect to get targeted ads about it soon enough lol
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, back for the next chapter of that batch review that I was aiming for, so let’s jump right back into things with Turo’s side of the story:

Chapter 5

Report on Time travel jump n. 2 of Dr. Romero Turo, time-anchor ID 9537.

Coordinates of successful jump: 48°51′12″ N, 2°20′55″ E (current time position: Lumiose City)

That actually makes me wonder, but do the time jumps have a limit as to where you can go spatially? Like is Turo jumping to and from this same coordinate in Lumiose?

Also, what does Neo-Lumiose look like in his time?

Weather conditions: Clear, temperatures recorded by suit sensors averaged 15°C. Measurements coherent with estimated data about Last Glacial Period. Body suit encountered no difficulties in maintaining body temperature to comfortable levels.

Number of hours spent time-displaced: 5 hours and 12 minutes

Wait, it was that long? Originally from last chapter’s prose, I thought Turo was out for something like an hour or two. .-.

Shortly after landing, encountered a Pokémon that seems to be an ancestor of the common modern Magikarp. The Pokémon, temporarily dubbed "Proto-Magikarp", showed a predatory instinct and aggressiveness completely absent in its modern counterpart. Its anatomy also showed a clear adaptation to hunting prey; strong musculature for swimming even against the current and developed teeth for ripping flesh, more similar in size and form to the ones seen in Pokemon like Basculin or Carvanha (possible common ancestor?).

That actually makes me wonder if the default in Turo’s time is just to call all of the “past” Pokémon forms like Great Tusk “Proto-[insert Pokémon here]”. Direct, but you can’t say that it’s not apt.

Most interesting was its behaviour after accidentally beaching itself in an attempt to assault me. It thrashed violently to right itself until it could attack again, in a movement extremely similar to the currently useless move "Splash" that Magikarp still uses today. I believe this to be the original use of the technique, and that possibly most Pokémon that are -or were- using the move known as Splash could actually have originally developed different uses for it, until changes in physiology and environment changed the move into its current iteration.

Wait, they still have normal Magikarp in the present day? Or do the Robokarp or whatever they have in Turo’s time still don’t do anything other than just uselessly flop around?

Made contact again with a native"

Ah yes, the part that’s all but bound to get Turo in hot water with the time police.

And there the report stopped, the cursor blinking on the monitor patiently waiting for Turo to continue. And it would have to wait quite a bit more longer, because the screen had been sitting untouched for the best part of two hours now, his its owner seemingly much more interested in slowly spinning the in his leather chairfake leather, of course. Where would you even get true leather these days?

Turo
he was currently slouched into and spun round and round, both arms behind his head, staring at the ceiling of his office. Contrary to the fancy ceiling of the sanity room, this one room’s didn't have much in terms of decoration - just the standard "regulate the artificial lights automatically to simulate sunlight".

I would recommend hacking this paragraph up into two and changing some formatting / smoothing out some typos.

At the moment, the light was dark orange, reflecting the sunset that was currently visible in real time right outside the window. Just a couple minutes more, and the last rays of sunlight would completely disappear behind the tall buildings of Mesagoza. In ancient times, the city had been built similarly to an old fortress, with the Pokémon Academy built on the top of a hill towering over every other building, looking down on the city. Nowadays, the Pokemon Academy (and the University for more modern studies that had been built near it a couple centuries ago) was neither at the highest point nor the tallest building in the city anymore.

inb4 it’s overshadowed by all of the buildings within walking distance from it.

He felt conflicted about reporting his meetings with Sada. On one hand, he kind of had to do it; on the other, having to write about it in such cold and technical terms, like it was nothing more than an experiment to report on, felt.... Wrong.

I mean, if you don’t talk about it in terms of an experiment, you’re probably going to get your time travel privileges revoked, so… ^^;

There was also the issue of other people taking interest in his project; now that he had proven that it was possible, nothing was stopping someone else going in the exact same time and place. It was extremely improbable; there was a sort of "code of honor" between researchers of the TTLD: no interfering with other people's project, unless you were actively collaborating in a joint activity.

I mean, the very fact that you’re bringing this up right now doesn’t bode well at all for that code of honor holding up, just saying.
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The possibility was there though, and the idea of an entourage of scientists arriving near Sada's people to study them like in some safari, even if carefully from afar while staying hidden instead of making active contact, was... It made him feel guilty.

He shouldn't have felt that way:

Studying and observing history was what they did, after all. That was the whole point of their job.

I take it that “ancient people safaris” are indeed a thing in the TTLD. Though I wonder if that should’ve been played up a bit more in earlier chapters, since this feels like it’s coming a bit out of left field even if it makes sense.

They travelled to the past as silent observers to confirm historical moments, to witness them first hand with a neutral perspective. Sometimes it was to confirm scientific theories, or to preserve artifacts that would have been lost to time otherwise. They did it to make sure not to repeat the mistakes of the past, and cautiously monitored the future to better prepare for it in the present.

Ah yes, just casually sitting by on the sidelines as heavens-knows-what unfolds in front of them. Like I get the need to avoid causing any butterfly effects, but there’s plenty of
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-worthy moments in history that would probably require a strong degree of self control to not get involved in.

It was right there in their motto, written in clear letters at the entrance of the Time Travel Laboratory Department, and again right on the time machine, something to be reminded of every time you stepped into it.

Ex tempore, scientia.

Ex scientia, sapientia.


"From time, knowledge. From knowledge, wisdom"

Ominous Latin motto is ominous there.

The irony of using a long dead language to write it in hadn't been lost on him. Whoever had come up with that had to have a nice sense of humour.

Oh, so they have a ‘Latin’ in their setting. I wonder if that’s meant to be Imperial Paldean, or if they have a proper “Rome” analogue.

So he shouldn't feel guilty in reporting all that had happened... But a part of him still did.

Turo stopped the chair so that it was facing the screen again. With a sigh, he gestured to the screen to resume writing and continued to silently dictate his report, mouthing the words while opening another screen on his left with a flick of his finger to check some data his suit had recorded.

Ah yes, the Minority Report UI makes a return.

Info about his vitals, measurements about the environment gathered automatically while regulating said vitals... Audio transcripts of the entire conversation.

He slipped an earpiece in and started to play the audio back from the very beginning.

He had to be as accurate as possible.

Ruh, roh, Scooby. I’ve got a bad feeling about this one…

Miraidon leaped excitedly out of the door, the pixelated compound pupils cycling through an array of colours outside of the usual cyan.

« Gyaa-»

Wait, they can do that canonically outside the difference between Ultimate and Low-Power mode? Or is that an invention for this story?

« I know, I know, just let me... Lock the door...» Turo had barely finished scanning his ID through the door when the Pokémon, growing impatient, started to gently headbutt his shoulder, nipping at his arm.

Let’s hope bike derg’s soft about that since, uh… that jaw shape looks like it’d probably hurt to get bitten by. ^^;

Turo laughed softly and let himself be pushed along, exiting their apartment complex and walking into the streets of the megalopolis. It was a nice Saturday morning and the street buzzed with activity; his wasn't the only Miraidon present, the dragon Pokémon zipping around roads that, with traffic by now virtually nonexistent for short distances, had been adapted to better use for them and other, still popular vehicles like Rotom bikes.

Huh. Though I guess it makes sense if casual teleportation is a thing nowadays. It does make me wonder if ground transportation being heavily tilted towards “fun” would mean that there’s some wild-looking cars floating around.

A bunch of kids was sitting on benches in a small plaza, excitedly talking about the latest e-sport tournament in some vr game or other.

Oh no, even in the future, the scourge of e-sports is still a thing.

He dismissed an ad that started playing on the wall-sized display of a building as soon as he got near, more focused on the news snippets that were playing on the screen next to it.

Celebrity gossip. The colony on Mars was still stuck in the middle of a global dust storm. Stark Mountain in Sinnoh had been erupting for five days straight. The Hassel Art Gallery was holding an art exhibition with pieces from the 24rd century (recovered by the TTLD, by the way).

I actually have to wonder, do these future sequences draw inspiration from Minority Report at all? Since I swear that these personalized ads and news articles are very reminiscent of some scenes in the movie.

A comet that would pass near Earth was closely being monitored, with some people swearing that it was going to be Jirachi's Millennium Comet (spoiler alert: it wasn't, its orbit was completely mapped and it came near Earth every 300 years or so. That didn't stop people from romanticism about it).

Ah yes, when science sucks all the fun and mystery out of your objects of folklore. Though I like how nonchalant everyone is about “oh yeah, that’s Jirachi’s comet” these days. Guess the G3 protagonist kinda let that one out of the bag, huh?

He turned to Miraidon while finishing to put on a pair of gloves; his riding clothes were slightly different from his usual body suit, more similar to mountain biking gear. Still sleek and pretty form fitting with a dark purple color(he just... Liked the color), it sported elbow and knee pads in woven borophene to absorb impacts, with the same sturdy but flexible material covering his chest and shoulders, and shoes with magnetic soles to better cling to Miraidon's back while riding. The last piece of equipment was a full face helmet in a solid black color.

« Gyaaaa-»

Is that the ‘your motorcycle is hungry, insert a sandwich into the mouth slot’ chime? :V

Turo could almost feel the dragon next to him raring to go, a static charge building up on his scales while it crouched low on all fours to let him mount on his back.

He patted the Pokémon's neck while jumping on with practiced ease, gripping the two spikes that grew from his front legs and acted as natural handlebars.

« All right, let's go!»

Ah yes, I’ve seen this movie before:

1dIwnO.gif


The Pokémon let out a piercing shriek and jumped forward, leaping a couple of times on all four legs, still in low power mode, before releasing the electricity it had been storing mid leap to generate two bright energy rings from its throat and tail, changing smoothly into his drive mode before it even touched the ground again.

More “roar”-y than I was expected, but close enough.

Turo lowered himself on the Pokémon's back while it sped up along the road, briefly racing with another Miraidon -the rider waving at them- before doing a sharp turn to get on the main road. There the dragon accelerated again, his rings glowing brightly while more electricity and power coursed through them, a roar growing increasingly louder not from the Pokémon's throat but from the jet-like vents from his legs.

Oh, so this is the part where we hear Kaneda’s bike engine whining.

Turo loved that feeling; the perfectly aerodynamic shape making him feel every air current, the electricity crackling on his skin and passing over him harmlessly, the fact that he could feel the dragon's power pushing him faster and faster... there was no other Pokémon that made riding it feel as viscerally satisfying as his Miraidon did.

A Rotom bike would never feel this good.

Cue the theme song blaring in the background:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6RVC0kaVU4


It was something in their very DNA, humans and Miraidon's ancestors Cyclizar had developed an almost symbiotic relationship since ancient times. It just felt right for the both of them, and the fact that they had been together since he was little more than a toddler and the Pokémon barely out of the egg had only made their bond even deeper. His mother always joked that Turo had almost learned to ride Miraidon before learning to walk, and certainly before learning to crawl.

Oh boy, Turo must’ve been quite the little terror as the kid with a buddy that could bring him quite literally up to speed with little effort. :copyka:

He tapped the Pokémon's right spike and gently pressed his left leg against the Pokémon's side, Miraidon reading his body language and turning to the right into another road, towards the city's southern gate... Which was actually a bit of a misnomer. It was more correct to say that it was the city's historical southern gate and border.... By now, "Mesagoza" had expanded to become a megalopolis that included Los Platos and another half a dozen cities in South Paldea, almost reaching Cabo Poco on the coast.

That makes me wonder just how big Paldea is in comparison to IRL!Iberia. Since… uh… that’s quite the city if they’re close in scale to each other.

Turo waited until they were officially out of the city's center before speaking to the Pokemon again. Technically, what he wanted to do wasn't exactly allowed. He needed a lot of open space and a nice, long road just to be safe.

« C'mon buddy, I know you can go much faster!»

Okay, not that this isn’t the most understandable urge ever, but how on earth is he not instantly getting photographed by a thousand speed traps given the tech level of Turo’s present day? ^^;

Miraidon snorted and shook his head, turning its head enough to glare at him with just one eye, the pupil flickering on and off in annoyance.

« Gyaa...»

Turo just grinned, the helmet masking his expression while he kept teasing the dragon. That was the reaction he was expecting, really. Mostly because it was kinda risky to do. For him, not for Miraidon. But it was also going to be awesome if it worked.

I take it that this is something a bit more ballsy than just breaking out Flight Mode and doing some impromptu aerial stunts, huh?

« Don't tell me you're scared to try that

« Gwaooooh!»

That seemed to do it, the Pokémon roaring indignantly before slowing down slightly, energy rings shrinking in size.

Turo braced himself, leaning completely forward on the dragon's back, his helmet almost touching the creature's smooth neck.

Miraidon: “*For the record, you asked for this, Turo.*”

The crackling of electricity kept rising all around him, Miraidon concentrating on revving up his Hadron Engine to the fullest before rearing up on his hind legs with a screeching, metallic roar. Yellow and purple-blue energy surged through the dragon's throat, tail and antennae while it started to push itself off the ground on pure electromagnetic power alone, first just levitating and then propelling itself higher and higher.

Ah yes, breaking out Ultimate Mode. I’m honestly surprised that Turo can actually ride him like this without getting badly zapped from all the electricity flying around.

Turo laughed while the road they had been following grew smaller and smaller, Miraidon soaring through the sky in his ultimate form at exhilarating speed. The wind was so strong that it kept him pushed flat on the dragon's back, and made it impossible to hear any sound apart from its howl. To communicate with the dragon, he would have to rely on touch alone, or simply trust its judgement.

They passed Los Platos in the span of fifteen minutes instead of the hour of driving it would have taken them travelling along the highway and kept going south, flying over other districts and towns. He could already see the ocean, high up as they were, the water glittering under the sun and a welcome change of scenery from the constant grey, pure white and bright artificial lights of the city.

… Wait, so how fast was Turo going anyways? Since I was under the impression that he was already not particularly slow and leisurely in Drive Mode.
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He pressed both legs against Miraidon's sides and leaned slightly to the left, noticing something on the coast that had caught his attention. The dragon growled in acknowledgement and started to tip forward towards the ground, dropping both altitude and speed while it slowly circled around the spot he had pointed to. Turo slowly straightened his back when the lower speed allowed it, sitting upright on the Pokémon's back and observing the building that laid under them, coming closer and closer.

It looked like an old lighthouse, the very top having broken off and fallen to the ground long ago, crashing through the roof of what looked like a small house built right next to it. And by old, he meant old, the place still looking like it had been built with classic bricks and mortar.

Oh, so this is where he gets the idea of using it as his lab later on.

That had to make it at least a thousand years old, if not much more.

Okay, so Turo is at minimum from the equivalent of the 31st century in his present day. Duly noted.

He directed Miraidon to land on the elevated platform that was still standing, then cautiously dismounted the dragon, almost expecting the entire building to crumble under his feet at the slightest touch. It didn't.

He took off his helmet and turned toward the edge of the platform, where a railing had probably allowed people to enjoy the view without risking falling off in the past, but had completely rusted away in the meantime. Being so close to the sea probably had not helped.

I have to wonder what on earth happened to Paldea such that this lighthouse was left to rot away with zero attempts at preservation. Wonder if there was a period in which it underwent societal simplification / some sort of apocalypse.

The ladder He quickly realized that there was not an elevator. Shit, that made it even older than he first thought. The ladder that had allowed the caretakers or visitors to climb up had met a similar fate, leaving nothing but a gaping hole and a long drop to the ground.

Miraidon: “*Good thing I’m here with Glide Mode, huh?*”
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He stared at the sea for a while; it was strange to think that the ocean was probably the only part of the current view that he could enjoy similarly to people that had stood here in the past, the only scenery that hadn't changed at all, and hopefully never would.

Let’s not think too hard about how there’s a non-zero chance that said oceans acidified and might be wildly less hospitable to life than in the past.

It was... strangely comforting. He watched for a couple minutes as the wind and waves came in, before turning back towards Miraidon.

« Let's keep going, I want to reach Artazon by noon » he declared. after another couple minutes, turning back towards Miraidon.

The dragon just stared at him, then hissed softly and briefly flicked his antennae, spreading his gliding membrane open.

The message was pretty clear: no flying in ultimate mode this time.

Oh, so Ultimate Mode wears out Miraidon if he stays in it too long. I suppose that makes sense, and is a handy way of balancing its usage meta-wise.

Turo just rolled his eyes, climbing back up on the Pokémon's back.

« Yeah, yeah... All right mom, we'll do it the boring and careful way...»

… Or Miraidon could just be worried for Turo’s well-being. That works, too.

There was another hiss by the lizard dragon and the gliding membrane opened up again before he was finished putting on his helmet, hitting him square on the nose.

Miraidon: “*Just saying, you brought that on yourself, Turo.*”
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« Your nose looks pretty red, is it alright?»

« Shut up, it's fine.»

Must’ve been quite a bonk through Turo’s helmet there. ^^;

The sanity room today was a beautiful recreation of the first floor of the Sprout Tower of Violet city. An hologram in the center of the room simulated the famous central pillar of the building, swaying in place, while the sound of creaking floorboards, soft chants and prayers from the monkspersonally recorded by current director and head researcher of the TTDLfilled the room. Someone had gone the extra mile and even lighted some incense. Bellsprouts were sadly missing though. It was the kind of atmosphere that made everyone present subconsciously talk in whispers, at least until Ortega snickered while stealing a chair from the next table and sitting down near him.

« Was it something in the Paleolithic era? »

Turo glared at his colleague, then sniffled. His nose still hurt.

Ortega: “I’ll just go ahead and take that as a ‘yes’.”

« No... Why would it be? Isn't that what the pre time-jump shots are for? Avoiding getting killed by millennia old bacteria and a dozen other things? » he answered. Ortega just shrugged.

« I don't know. Maybe you had gotten punched in the face by some caveman.»

« No, nothing like that.» he Turo quickly tried to change the subject, not wanting to admit to getting whacked in the face. [ ]

« How is your project going? What was it again...?»

It probably makes sense to make this ‘he’ explicitly ‘Turo’, and to add a bit more transition going back to Ortega as the speaker.

Ortega was a bit of a weird case in the department, always seeming to swap between one project or another instead of focusing on one thing at a time; Turo could never quite remember what the guy was working on at the any given moment.

« "Confirming historical moments that drastically changed human society in the last couple centuries"» Ortega recited.

« Which is just a fancy way of saying "I dick around dressed in historically accurate clothes"» another voice piped up from the table where Ortega had just stolen furniture from. A woman with ferociously red hair sat down opposite from Turo, offering a handshake.

So if Ortega shares a name with a Team Star Boss, does that make this woman ‘Mela’?

« Melany Vega, pleased to meet you»

I was joking there. But cute way of keeping the shared name theming going.

He took it, trying not to smile at Ortega looking annoyed.

« Hey, dressing for the part is important! Especially in more recent centuries. In ancient times, you can land anywhere and just say "Ooooh, me come from far away land!" and people will believe you because it's not like they knew better. That doesn't fly in modern times. People will know something's up if you show up in impossible clothes. Not to mention getting caught on camera. And the internet. »

When on earth has Mela(ny) been messing around in anyways? Has she been pulling an Iono in the present day or something? ^^;

[ ]

« W-wait... Wouldn't it still be better to at least try and... Look like you fit in? Should I...? » Turo asked, eyes widening.

IMO, you should probably add more of a transition to going back to Turo’s end of things since this feels a bit abrupt.

Both fellow time travellers looked at him for a moment.

« You're "Paleolithic era" guy, right? » Vega asked.

... Is that what people were calling him?

Ortega + Vega:
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Turo: “Gee, thanks for letting me know there.” >_>;

« Yours is a special case. You go so far back that it doesn't matter. Even if someone noticed your weird clothes, at most it would become a bit of a strange story and then get lost to time... Unless you did something so memorable that it becomes a legend passed down for all of human history, but in that case, we would have bigger problems on our hands.

I can already tell that Turo’s going to blunder into this and get the Not!TVA all up on his ass.

And we wouldn't even know where to start in making replicas of clothes that pass as historically accurate for you, because we know so little about it. Do it wrong, and it's even worse. » Vega answered after a moment. Ortega nodded.

« Yeah, best you could do for historical accuracy was showing up naked... And I don't recommend that.»

[ ]

« ... You sound like you speak from experience.» Turo muttered after a moment.

Ortega just smiled, refusing to elaborate.

:copyka:

I wonder if we’ll ever get the story behind what happened with Ortega here, since it sounds like it was a wild Noodle Incident back in the day. Though I would recommend explicitly showing off a bit more of Turo’s [vidriblink] reaction to Ortega relating his story.

Turo could only sigh at his senior, then turned back towards the redhead.

« If I may ask, what are you working on...?»

« "Gathering photographic evidence of legendary Pokemon's sightings in different eras"»

Turo's mouth hung open for a moment.

« You chase legendaries? »

Oh, so she’s the one who keeps messing up my attempts to capture the Legendary Gerbils. And yeah, I can totally already tell that Turo winds up creating the Iron Serpent myth.

Arceus, that must have looked badass on your resume.

Vega nods.

« It's way less epic than what it sounds like. 90% of "legendary Pokémon" sightings in history are people that had one too many drinks and mistook a Pangoro for an Urshifu or something stupid like that. » she explains.

inb4 the Iron Serpent myth winds up getting caused by Miraidon lighting up a Wingull flock out of spite over a stolen sandwich or something like that.

« You did get that really cool picture of the battle between Groudon and Kyogre in Sootopolis City though. The one from uuuuh... 2005 was it?» Ortega points out.

Aha, using the release year of Pokémon Emerald as the year that its events happened.

« Those two are always going at it, it's nothing special! My grandma's got a picture from their last battle some 50 years ago that looks basically the same! » Vega rants, looking annoyed.

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I sure hope there was a conveniently placed young training prodigy back then, since otherwise that probably doesn’t bode well as to the state of Sootopolis in the present day.

« The only way you can tell the picture is genuinely from 2005 it's because Steven Stone and those two eco terrorist idiots are chillin' in the background!»

Emerald confirmed. So wait, does that mean that the Gen 1 story arc took place in 2004 to match up with FRLG given that in franchise media Gen 1 and Gen 3 take place close to concurrently with each other?

The two men both laugh, then to his dismay Ortega manages to bring the conversation back to his nose.

« Anyway, what I wanted to say before we got sidetracked was... I would wait a couple more days before jumping back, if I were you. Get that nose back to normal. The less excuses you have to make and keep track of, the better. That's why I don't like visiting the same time more than a couple of times. Too much effort [ ]. » he shrugged again.
It was surprisingly solid advice, and Turo nodded, grimacing a bit. He had hoped to jump back exactly three days later for both him and Sada to try and keep the two timelines as coherent as possible- if nothing else, for his own sanity, because the second jump being an entire month for him and barely a week for her had already been confusing enough, but it looked like things rarely would be that easy to keep track of.

I get that Turo basically gives a bunch of exposition shortly afterwards, but I kinda wonder if the “too much effort” bit ought to have had a bit more passing allusion/mention of what the effort is (I assume it’s timeline maintenance).

Still, as long as the disparity was only going to be a couple more days here and there, he could do it…

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When he had gone went back (and his nose gone went back to normal) to Sada's camp he had expected to find her already there, but the place looked abandoned. No pelts or furs to mark a spot where she could have been sleeping, and even someone as clueless as him could see that the fire hadn't been used in days. She probably had gone back to her group for a couple of days.

I’m not convinced that it’s as simple as that given all the Sadwott reactions that are apparently on the next chapter. Which… uh… probably isn’t a good sign there.

He decided to light the fire himself while waiting for her to arrive, then set himself down on the ground. He'd brought a second notebook with him - it's not wasn’t like he could bring anything more advanced than pen and paper to take notes in. Dropping some paper and a pen in the wrong century? No problem, it wouldl decompose in no time and the most someone can do was doodle on it. Dropping an entire tablet?

Way more risky if someone else found it.

I mean, you’d think that dropping it in the Paleolithic wouldn’t be that bad, since there’s exactly zero industrial base for the locals to reproduce it. Plus once the batteries run out, it’d probably get used as a mirror or a cutting board.

The only exception was his suit, but even then, half of its function only really worked when he goes worked back to his time. Sure, it was recording every single heart beat of his, or changes in body or external temperature, or fluctuations in hormones and stress levels, but he couldn't access the data here, and the suit itself literally only worked for the one who wore it, keyed to their DNA.

He started to jot down some observations about what has happened until now and what he wants to check today. Sada had shown him a drawing of what was unmistakably a Talonflame, and hadn't commented on it when he had drawn one himself: that could only mean that in this time Talonflame was already the same as the one he knew from documentaries and pictures. No weird changes like that Proto - Magikarp.

Okay, so admittedly, I’m not fully sure what verb tense you intended to use for this scene, but my assumption was that you wanted past tense narration, so try and be a bit more consistent about that.

It made a certain amount of sense. Even in his time, not all Pokemon had slowly changed until they were basically recognised as different species like Miraidon and Cyclizar had.

Some had simply gone extinct, not being able to adapt. Some (not many, admittedly, with the great majority of them being legendaries and mythicals that were so powerful they didn't need to change) hadn't felt the need to change further, like Magikarp.

Oh, so they do have those weak little Magikarp in the present day. Though the biosphere of Turo’s world must be a horrorshow given the sheer number of Pokémon that basically had to cyborgize in order to survive in its conditions.

He wanted to observe a Talonflame of this time if possible... But he was mostly interested in their feathers.

They were pretty famous for being completely fireproof: people had used them for creating fire- resistant clothes since ancient times, and he wanted to know if Sada knew about that property, but had had no idea how to ask her about it.

Easiest thing would be to just find some feathers and show her.

Ah yes, I’m beginning to see Turo’s epic blunder that gets him in trouble with the time police taking shape already. Since this feels like a real easy way to throw a timeline out of whack if Sada’s people aren’t supposed to discover that Talonflame feathers are fire-retardant for another millennia.

They had found some feathers, but not the ones he was interested in, and in the meantime, Turo had been forced to pretend that they were looking for them because he was cold.

He wasn’t, the bodysuit was more than capable of keeping his body at a perfectly comfortable average temperature of 37°C at any time. But he knew that they surely didn't look like warm clothes, and saying that he was fine would just look weird - and the last thing he needed was looking even weirder than he already did.

Reminder to come down hard on one of past or present verb tenses. I assumed you wanted “past” based off the “had found” part.

Still, the feather they have found was pretty big - big enough that the Pokemon it comes from must have had an impressive wing span -, and Sada herself didn't seem to know much about it. He slips the feather into his pocket, with half an idea of having the guys from the science department at Uvanja Academy run some DNA tests on it to try and identify what Pokémon it is.

Okay, this is a part where you can switch verb tenses if so inclined, since you’re going from a segment where Turo is talking about things that have happened after the fact to one where he’s talking about things that are happening in live-time.

The forest has gotten darker and darker as soon as since the sun had gone went down. Turo shouldn't be surprised, it's obvious that it would become dark, but... He had no idea it would be this dark. A total, impenetrable, pitch black darkness that looked ready to swallow them as soon as the fire on the little torch Sada was carrying fizzled out.

Anything could be hiding out there.

IMO, the last sentence from this paragraph works better on its own as an emphasis thing.

He's suddenly incredibly aware of how spoiled living with artificial light always available has made him. True darkness simply does not exist anymore in his time... Except maybe the bottom of the ocean or something. Places where humans have no business living in any case.

Oh, so Turo’s world just has severe skyglow everywhere at night that keeps him from seeing the stars in the sky, huh?

Anywhere else, there is always a street lamp, or a display or a monitor that's on 24/7, or his Rotom Phone. His own clothes have stripes with a slight bioluminescence built into them.

His eyes simply are not used to not having even just a bit of light. And speaking of his clothes, Sada is staring at them, and it occurs to him that maybe wearing something that literally shouts where you are to any nocturnal Pokémon in the vicinity wasn't exactly the best of ideas. The fire on Sada’s torch could be put out, or brandished as a weapon in an emergency. His bodysuit... Not so much.

He buttons up his lab coat (which is only slightly more stealthy due to his color, or lack thereof) to hide it completely.

I’m surprised that nobody drilled Turo on the importance of hiding his attire when going back into past ages, since you’d think that doing something like bumbling into Imperial Paldea with an outfit that looks like a glowstick at night would cause enough problems that the TTLD would hard-veto sending them back to times and places in history where they would stand out to human observers.

She takes his hand, which he doesn't mind. It's starting to become a constant, her dragging him along and leading the way, but this time he finds himself frozen to the spot when he almost casually lifts his head to glance at the night sky.

He's never seen this many stars in real life.

Whelp, Turo having lived under skyglow hell constantly in his world is officially confirmed.

Too much light pollution in the city, making the night sky look like a foggy black sheet with only the moon and the brightest stars managing to shine through.

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This is actually something that’s more consistent with particulate pollution. Severely light polluted skies look more like a milky haze, especially when there’s cloud cover or smog in the skies.

Of course he's seen pictures, and documentaries, and those stupidly big photographs done with the latest telescopes with a resolution of a bajillion pixels where you could zoom in for a good while before getting tired and closing the tab. He's even gone to a planetarium a couple of times, but even that time, as cool as it had been, it still had only been a really good 3D picture projected on a (really big) screen.

There was no sense of depth on a picture or a screen. No way to reproduce the slight vertigo he was feeling in this moment, with the sky so impossibly open and vast over his head and everywhere he looked, just more and more stars.

I’m honestly a little shocked that holographic displays aren’t omnipresent in Turo’s far future when they’re already fairly widespread in mainline Pokémon games from 6th Gen and onwards. Even if I suppose that his remark about lack of depth would still apply since there’s only so much you can do to mimic that sense of vastness.

Not a single silhouette of a building to cover it. No blinking lights from planes or satellites or space stations.

Wew, humanity has certainly reached for the stars in Turo’s time. I wonder if they have an out-and-out orbital ring yet.

He kinda wants to keep staring at the sky for a while, but Sada keeps dragging him along and he can't do much else but follow her.

Still, he's pretty sure that he's got another stupid smile on his face that's impossible to stop.

He’s had a lot of those during these jaunts back to Paleolithic times, hasn’t he? :V

He stands corrected: the smile melts off his face when they arrive back to camp and it becomes increasingly obvious that Sada expects him to spend the night with her.

Not with her, thank Arceus, but still to sleep at the camp until morning (and giving him some blankets made of what looks like thick Mamoswine fur while she is at it, because he's cold, of course).

From her point of view, it makes perfect sense.

From his point of view, it means he can't leave.

Ah yes, this one’s certainly going to be fun to explain to the time police. Fortunately for him, Sada’s tribe is (probably) not literate.

Not without going poof right in front of her, and that is, of course, bad.

"Rule number 1 of the time traveller manual" levels of bad. Don't get seen appearing or disappearing.

Is there a reason why you can’t just wait until everyone’s asleep, close the entrance to the tent and then blip out? ^^;

He needs to get a good distance away from her to avoid having the flash of light that accompanies his jumps alert her - or the entire forest for that matter -, but that is just not possible at the moment.

Huh, I didn’t realize that his jumps gave off that much light. Guess that answers the question of why Turo can’t just close up a tent and call it a day, though I wonder if it should’ve been foreshadowed a bit prior to this point.

Turo's got the distinct impression that the woman is keeping an eye on him even while she is completely draped in blankets herself, ready to bolt and tackle him to the ground if he so much as tries to look like he wants to walk away and get his dumb ass eaten in the forest the instant he steps out of the circle of light, warmth and protection offered by the fire.

… You could always just wait until the morning and blip out during the day when the flash will be less noticeable?
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He finally gets an opportunity to slip away almost at dawn, when he is sure that she is fast asleep, but not before slowly and carefully leaving a message with the next date when they can meet up near her. Only two days.

Oh, so I was right, even if I didn’t expect him to still make the jump while it was still dark out.

It ends up being four on his time, because the time machine is completely booked in the following days, even in the night. That's also something that was starting to mess with him, having to come and go in the middle of the night, but it had surprisingly worked out this time. Spending an entire night in the past too nervous to sleep, then finally coming back at the crack of dawn and it still being like 3 AM felt amazing and had basically made his tired brain go "yesss, free sleepy time!" when he had come home and crashed asleep on the bed.

Oh, so the time travel that far back is having side effects… maybe.

The next day, after finishing his report - he can already hear the jokes about "spending the night there"-, he submits a request for having some analysis performed on the feather he's brought back. He also makes them analyze the necklace. The answer arrives just a couple of hours later, mostly because there isn't too much to say.

Yes, DNA from the necklace and the feathers were a perfect match, so it is the same Pokémon.

No, they've got no idea what it is.

It’s from Koraidon, isn’t it? Since I remembered that feather sounded very “Koraidon” in appearance.

"You want us to try and look for the closest genetic relative? That's going to take a bit more"

"Sure, go ahead"

He had made sure to get the necklace back from them, though. By now it was starting to feel weird to not have it around his neck.

I actually wonder if that necklace is Sada’s necklace, or else if it’s something completely different.

Turo stepped into the time machine, and immediately scowled when the first thing to greet him in the past was rain hitting him in the face. Great, he would have to charge his time-anchor manually this time if it didn't let up soon.

There had to be a better way to do this, he thought as he made his way towards the camp, boots squelching through the mud. Couldn't Porygon 568 check the weather for him before he jumped? An umbrella would have been weird, but he would have brought at least a jacket.

Considering how you all know bupkis about these environs… no, I wouldn’t hold my breath on a weather forecast, Turo.

This time Sada is already waiting for him, even if it takes him a moment to recognize her; she's wearing what looks like a primitive grey cape with a hood to protect her from the rain, and a larger than usual bag slung on her back. She's definitely more prepared than him. Sada must be thinking something similar, because she just looks at him - hair plastered on his face, lab coat getting soaked, probably a tired dead look in his eyes- and shakes her head with half a smile.

Huh. So she is getting into the Professor life even back in her own time.

« Come with me.»

By now her hand grasping his wrist and pulling him along is becoming a familiar sight; Sada hurries him along in the opposite direction they've been going two nights ago, walking increasingly uphill. After a couple of minutes his legs were already burning with pain from the effort; at least the time-anchor was getting charged. Sada, who is also carrying way more clothes and luggage than him, is barely breathing any faster than normal.

... was he horribly out of shape, or were people just built differently back then?

I mean, you literally either teleport or hitch a ride on Miraidon for like 99% of your travel back home, so…

... both??

Yeah, that sounds about right.

He slipped on the mud a couple of times and she grabs his arm with both hands to stop him from falling back down the hill, then mercifully stopped for a moment.

« Here » she offers him her spear to use as a makeshift walking stick, and he takes it after a second, feeling absolutely ridiculous. This thing was heavy: a good two meters long, the stone tip masterfully crafted to a sharp point and kept in place by fibers wrapped to make rope. And they used to throw these things.

Sada: “... Which I might wind up regretting shortly since that’s kinda my primary defensive tool, but let’s not think too hard about that.” ^^;

His month spent reading up on Stone Age life has taught him one thing: the only reason humans had not only not gone extinct by sharing the planet with Pokémon but had risen as the dominant species was thanks to their ability to just throw stuff really, really well. Almost everything else had come from that. Early hominids had literally evolved to throw stuff as efficiently as possible; hell, even the Pokéball, which they had based their entire society on after its invention, had been developed to be thrown.

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We also have crazy stamina compared to most animals so we can literally just chase after them slowly until they keel over… even if that probably is a bit less reliable against Pokémon.

They could have made it so it had to be rolled. Or punched. Or simply pointed against the objective, but nah, they had decided "let's throw that, watch me nail that Bidoof on the head from 30 meters" (or at least, that's how he had always imagined the first practical demonstration of the Pokéball to have gone down).

That actually makes me wonder how old Pokéballs are for Turo. Since at least in PLA, they were implied to be a relatively recent invention (or at least recently dispersed) relative to their time.

And that was just... wild to him. Even as heavy as it is, the spear helps quite a bit in keeping him upright while walking.

« Where... are we... going?» he heaved after a while.

Sada turned around for a moment, looking at him a bit worried, then pointed at something that rested at the very top of the hill. He squinted through the rain; the green and brown of the forest disappeared towards a massive crag. Near its base, a rock overhang created a natural space shielded from the rain.

… Is this going to lead to encountering Koraidon, or…?

With a sigh of relief, Turo forces himself to climb the last couple hundred meters until they reach the entrance of the cave.

He fumbles for his time-anchor while sitting down on the ground and clicks a button to take note of the current coordinates; no way was he going to climb that hill again if he could avoid it.

Not convinced that this was the wisest of ideas, since the fact that attention is being drawn to this sounds like a recipe for something to go wrong eventually.

Meanwhile, Sada just looks like she did nothing more than have a nice leisurely stroll. She pulls down her hood and sits down near him with a smile.

« Hi.» he smiled a bit in response; they have both picked up words from the other, he usually [ ] more words from her than the opposite, so hearing her speak something in his language is still kind of strange.

You’re missing something between “usually” and “more words” in the second paragraph, but I had trouble teasing out what from context.

Turo takes off his lab coat to leave it to dry, and can't help but notice that Sada is staring at it. With an amused chuckle, he remembers how fascinated by it she seemed to be on their first meeting and offers it to the woman, who stared at him wide-eyed for a moment before taking it with both hands and examining it.

« What creature is it?» she wondered.

« It's not... here. » he answered slowly after a moment. Better just to tell her that it came from some Pokémon that lived incredibly far away.

I’m now curious as to if they have Sawk in Paleolithic Kalos, and if they do, if their attire is different from the modern day since that would’ve been a decently close visual map to a labcoat.

« Where my, umm... people are.» he added, remembering the word after a short moment.

Technically the truth. She pouted, evidently disappointed, then gives him back the lab coat and goes for her bag. He's actually been curious about that: it's held shut with strips of leather, and is probably full of everything she needs to set up camp somewhere. There's blankets rolled up, her smaller leather pouch where she seems to gather berries and other perishables, and of course, the notebook, hidden inside one of the blankets... to protect it from the rain, probably. He smiled almost proudly - of course she would be careful like that.

Careful, Turo. Keep this up, and you’re going to wind up getting roped into giving linguistics lectures back in your home time. ^^;

Sada took the notebook out and flipped it open; he shuffled a bit closer, ready for another language lesson, but the page is completely empty. She actually looks a bit embarrassed all of a sudden.

« I, umm.... » she pointed to her own cape and hood, then to his bodysuit.

« "Clothes" »

Turo nodded, not sure where she was going with this.

I’m actually surprised that Sada doesn’t have a conception of clothes in her language. Unless if the idea is that she’s asking about what type of clothing Turo’s wearing or what its composition is and he’s misinterpreting things.

Sada started to rummage in her bag again; usually he is the one to embarrass himself in front of her, so seeing her mutter something under her breath while avoiding his gaze is... the only word he can find is "precious".

It's adorable.

Ah yes, that crush of his is back in action right now. :V

« Turo's clothes, um... cold. So I... make clothes... my people clothes... » she showed him what she had taken out of the bag: a big bundle of cloth of various sizes and color, the furs obviously coming from different Pokémon. And in her other hand, what's obviously a needle made out of bone.

She wants to... oh man.

Looks like he's getting those "historically accurate clothes" after all.

So does that mean that we’re going to see Turo go around bare-chested to complete the Gigachad comparison meme?

Alright, it took a bit, but I made it to the end, and as I’m sure you gathered from the line-by-line, I had quite a bit of thoughts about the story.

Once again, the main star of the show is the characterization, both of Sada and Turo, but also of Miraidon from the increased focus we got on him in the earlier part of this chapter. It actually made me wonder a bit if there should’ve been a little more emphasis on Turo parsing not having his trusty companion around, but eh. I’m sure we’ll make up for that later. The comparative worldbuilding between Turo and Sada’s times was also fun to see with how things that are completely taken for granted for one are completely alien in the other, such as Turo getting winded from what’s a normal hike for Sada or him finding skies with zero light pollution to be strange and awe-inspiring. Like yeah, the take of the Professors hailing from different periods of history got shot into a million pieces officially, but you did a good job running with pre-release speculation and exploring it in a compelling manner.

I noticed that you had a number of typos and grammar slip-ups throughout this chapter. Nothing that distracted too much from the story, but enough that you probably want to make a point of sitting down and ironing them out eventually. I noticed at a couple points that you introduced certain concepts / things that the characters had had on their minds that hadn’t really been played up in earlier chapters, which had the net effect of making them feel like they got brought up suddenly. There might have been a few more rough patches with this chapter, but I honestly was having too much fun with things for them to really stick out too much.

Glad to be back with this story @Nekodatta , since this chapter certainly didn’t disappoint. I’ll prioritize coming back for that fifth chapter of this batch review, but you’ve certainly got the parts of this story beyond that on my radar. You’ve got a pretty fun premise here, and even if there’s some things about it that I wish were more polished, I’ll be looking forward to seeing where it goes.
 
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