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Summary and Author Notes

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Cygnus was your average teen. One who had big dreams and ambitions just like any other. So after years of extensive studying and preparing, he finally earned the opportunity to receive a starter and start his journey!

After a fumble that nearly costed his starter at the professor's lab, he sets out on an adventure of a lifetime! Ready to meet new friends, fight foes and enemies alike, and take down any evil that crawled up.

And he steps out, ready to take on the world by storm–

Then the next day, he died in a brutal tragedy.

But whether by his sheer determination or a mysterious hand at play, he wakes up once more. Back in his bed. Back in the beginning, and ready to start anew once more.

Hopefully, this time he'll stop failing.




Hello and welcome to another fic that has been brewing on my mind!

As the summary entails and implies, this is a Nuzlocke fic with a twist being that along with the trainer's Pokémon, he will also died and as such, every death will reset the trainer back to a specific point in time (essentially time-looping). This will take place in an AU version of Pokémon Platinum where things will feel and look the same until the curtains begin to unravel...

Anywho, the Content Warnings for this fic will be: Deaths (both human and Pokémon), Gore, Suffering, Heavy themes like Depression and Suicidal thoughts, Loneliness and Trauma. (If you know Re:Zero then this story will be pretty similar to that)

And while this is a Nuzlocke fic. It's not exactly based on any Nuzlocke runs I've done since I have a horrible track record of completing them. Instead, it'll be mostly based around my experience with failing multiple Nuzlocke runs 'cause I suck at nuzlocking romhacks. Likewise, the rules for it will mostly be uncovered as the story goes on because I like keeping things a mystery.

So yeah! Enjoy your time reading this and prepare for a wild ride!

Any and all feedback will be greatly appreciated! So let me know what you think!
 
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Chapter 1: The End of Nothing

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Implied Death, Some Swearing

Beta-read by Tango


Everything hurts.

White hot pain laced across my mind, scattering my thoughts and spinning the world around me. My vision dimmed and muted, sounds grew muffled and distant.

Somebody…

My eyes trailed onto the graying world around me.

Please…

I still had so much I wanted to do.

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision. The shadows writhed, dim reality coiling slowly, slowly, seizing me like a prized relic.

Help…

My body was trembling but I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel my arms nor my legs. Warmth fled my body a long time ago, leaving the hard and cold concrete to chill me down to my very bones.

I was so tired… so… so…

Someone…

I tried to cry out.

But no one replied.

There were sirens, muffled screams and tears.

Everything felt hollow, empty.

And slowly, slowly…

… my consciousness slipped away into the darkness…



My alarm clock blared with a roar of a thousand howls.

I awoke with a startled yelp, panic gripping my heart as I flailed my arms and legs. Unfortunately, the blanket covering me did an amazing job in trapping my limbs and I performed an excellent tumble onto the firm wood that was the floor.

“Ow…” I winced, a dull ache pounding my head relentlessly despite the blanket breaking my fall. With a groan, I threw it back onto the bed, rubbing a hand against the bump in my head as I got up. “My head…”

My mind was still groggy but the pain kept my focus from slipping back into the foggy recesses of sleep. I found myself sitting there on the floor, thoughts still reeling from that… that dream? I mean, what else was there to call that? But that dream felt so vivid, so real in a sense that was hard to describe. I swore I could still feel myself laying there on the cold concrete, a tingly sensation seizing my body and ridding me of feeling anything but fog and numbness. I was pretty sure I also heard something that sounded like crying…

A sharp sting punctured my attempts at remembering and I winced, silencing the alarm clock. But even without that incessant shrill, I couldn't get a grip on anything but the barest of fragments.

I shuddered, feeling cold despite the morning sun shining from my window. Even with only the vaguest of details, I couldn't get over how… real everything felt. Like I was still laying there, cold, alone, dying

Tearing my head away from the dream, I looked around. To my left was a window, and for some stupid reason, I seemed to have left the curtains open, leading to the brilliant sun practically blinding me wherever I turned. My bed was messy, the blanket and pillows scattered and strewn about after my panicked wake up. The ticking of the alarm clock followed my every motion, the time flashing innocently under my gaze.

… Wait.

Wait a second…

I blinked, once, twice. But the number was still the same, still the bright red lights showing–

Oh no. Oh no no no.

It was eight.

Eight freaking thirty.

Oh crap oh crap!

I was late!

So incredibly late!

How? Why did my alarm clock wake me up so late? I thought I'd set it to ring at six! Aaaahh, this was bad. This was really bad.

I rushed into the bathroom, speeding through the process of cleaning myself. I didn't have time to waste here, I was late for my starter!

Amidst the panic, a stray thought crept onto my mind. My rival, Terra, must've gotten her starter already. We were talking about this day for the better half of the month, even agreeing to meet up before heading to the lab. If she knew the reason why I wasn't there, she'd never let me live this down.

After combing down the Rattata’s nest that was my shaggy brown hair into something respectable, I put on a simple red T-shirt and a pair of brown trousers… or well, tried to. It was admittedly hard to do so when I was running down the stairs. And like an idiot, I promptly lost my balance and fell straight down.

Thankfully, my back broke my fall.

Unfortunately, my back was now in pain.

“Are you okay, dear?” my mom shouted from the kitchen, concerned.

“I'm fine, mom!” I couldn't stop now. Standing back up, I successfully wrestled my leg down my pants and grabbed my bag hanging on the railing.

“Well, come and get breakfast, Cygnus. It's gonna get cold if you–”

“Sorry, Mom!” I shouted back, a hand reaching for the door just a few steps away. “But I gotta go! I'm already late for my starter! Bye, Mom!”

“Cygnus–”

Slamming the door behind me, I sprinted towards my destination. Knowing my mom, she’d find a way to convince me to stay but I needed my starter. I couldn't be late!

The morning air was dry and fresh, luckily we lived somewhere deeper in Sandgem so I didn't have to trudge through sand whenever I decided to go outside. People mingled about in the streets but thankfully as the day was still young, I didn't have a lot of people I had to worry about. “Sorry! Excuse me! Coming through!” I waded through, finding my opportunity to slip past the steady stream of people and into an alleyway.

I lived in Sandgem Town for practically my entire life so I knew the ins and outs of the place, and the fastest routes to reach the lab. I just had to get through this alleyway, past the park, and I'd be at the Pokémon center where–

Something stopped me dead still, my momentum ramming straight into and down onto the ground. I winced at the stinging pain in my nose as I fell right onto my butt. “Ow…”

What hit me? There wasn't supposed to be anyone in this alleyway, not with all the trash and gunk. I got back up, a hand rubbing my sore behind as I gave whoever stood in my way a glare.

The man who stared back with a pinched expression froze me right into my roots. He was tall, taller than the professor by half a head and practically twice my height. My breath hitched. The man looked dead, pale as a corpse. His cheeks were sunken, his eyes surrounded by dark rings like he hadn't slept in weeks. Despite his height, he was a skinny and lanky person, more bone than flesh with how his skin-tight suit stretched into his skin.

The sun cast an ominous shadow over him, and his eyes gleamed like silver under the dim lighting. His glare was intense, harshly fierce like he was inspecting a particularly pesky bug.

I took a step back. Who-who was this? Did I just find a ghost? The guy didn't look real. How could a man have bleached blue hair while having skin paler than even Mom? Not to mention the weird outfit like he was trying to cosplay a really weird astronaut.

The man was quiet, unnaturally still like a broken down machine. I could feel my heart racing as the nerves shook my body. “I–I’m sorry, sir,” I stammered out. “I wasn't looking at where I was going and I uh…”

What should I say? What could I say? I didn't even know if he was going to kill me, eat my brain or… or… His glare didn't diminish in its intensity. And it was horrifying how expressionless his face looked, like he actually was a corpse that somehow retained consciousness.

After what felt like hours of being examined like a lab rat, he finally nodded, leaving without a word and not a single one of his steps making a sound.

When he got out of my sight, I flopped over and fell onto my knees. My heart was racing, my breaths laboured and heavy. “O-okay, scary ghosts in jumpsuits are a thing now.” I joked, more out of habit than anything humourous. My eyes glanced over to where the man vanished into and I stamped down the part of my mind that was curious about who that was.

Though oddly I couldn't help but feel like there was something familiar about the man. Like I had met him before.

I shook my head. No! I was not going down a spooky alleyway, chasing after a shady skeleton man. That sounded like a horrible idea.

Taking in deep, calming breaths, I let the nerves run through its course before returning to the task at hand. I had to keep going. I still had a starter to get.

A lot slower though. Who knew if there were any more scary jumpsuit ghosts out there.



I… made it.

Professor Rowan’s lab! I reached it!

“Ah…” I panted, pushing open the door. “I'm… I'm here!”

My exhausted shout drew the attention of everyone towards me. The lab assistants chatting to each other, the janitor cleaning in the corner and more notably, Professor Rowan and Lucas turned away from their conversation to look at me, neither of whom bothered to hide their surprise.

My lungs felt like they were on fire as my legs dragged me across the room. I really shouldn't have skipped gym class. Ugh, I regretted everything!

“I'm… I'm not too late, right?”

Rowan and Lucas glanced at one another. The professor’s fuzzy eyebrows furrowed in displeasure or well… It was honestly a little hard to gauge his reaction since his default expression looked like he was always displeased about everything.

Lucas, though, was a lot more expressive. An uncomfortable frown lining his face as he turned. “Well, you are over two hours later than expected.” He forced out a chuckle. “We didn't think you’d even show up.”

“And I did! I’m right here, aren't I?” I panted. “Please please please please tell me you have a starter left!”

Lucas turned to the professor, his eyes asking for help that his mouth was too afraid to voice.

The professor sighed, stepping forward with a stern glare. “You were late.”

Receiving his full attention, I stepped back, feeling the words stuck in my throat. “It-it wasn't on purpose, Professor! I was just so excited to start my journey that I couldn't sleep and–and my alarm clock didn't wake me up even though I was sure I set it and–”

He held up a hand. “I'm sorry, Cygnus. I handed out the last of my starters over an hour ago.”

Wh-what?

“No… this can't be...” I must've heard him wrong. He couldn't be out, he couldn't!

“Cygnus. You were nearly three hours late,” he said, body unmoving like a statue. “Now I understand what it's like to receive your first Pokémon, let alone something as rare as a regional starter and while I could excuse being a bit later than the planned meet up.” He sighed. “I cannot excuse someone for being later than an hour, let alone three. And you should know that I am a very busy man, I don't have time to waste merely standing around.”

I could hardly hear the end of his speech over the raging denials swirling in my head. This couldn't be real. It just couldn't be. All that time spent waiting, all that hard work and effort spent studying to even get a chance at this, all my plans and dreams. All of it was going to waste because I couldn't wake up.

I…

Tears welled up in my eyes but I dropped my head to hide them. Now wasn't the time nor place. I couldn't let them see me like this.

“Yeah… I guess…” I managed to make it not sound like I was about to break apart.

The professor took in a breath, his voice softening, his gruffy expression somehow seeming less gruff. “Look, boy. I could try asking for another batch but I can't guarantee it'll be here before next week.”

Next week? I hid the grimace behind a sigh. I'd be so far behind but it was better than nothing. Professor Rowan was giving me a chance here.

I bowed low, a textbook perfect ninety degrees angle and showing my sincerest gratitude to the professor. “Thank you.”

With those quiet words, I took my leave with hurried steps, only slowing down after I was a couple of blocks away from the lab. My vision was blurry with tears but I didn't need to see properly to keep walking.

“Damn it.”

I clenched a fist, the despair quickly turning into rage as I rounded into an alleyway. My feet collided with a piece of trash and that broke down my self-control as I kicked a nearby bin. Nrgh! I was mad, so damn pissed at myself for being such an idiot.

If I hadn't stayed up so late, if I had set my alarm properly, if I hadn't woken up so late! I would've gotten my starter already and beaten my rival to the curb! What was wrong with me? I knew today was gonna be the greatest day of my life and yet–

“Aaaaahhh!”

I didn't know how long I'd spent venting my frustrations on the poor things here. But I was tired and hungry, my stomach protesting my poor decisions by the time I left the alleyway. I wasn't looking forward to my mom’s scolding but I didn't have a choice. She’d get worse if I spent more time out here without anything to show for.

“...!”

I sighed, dragging my feet into slow and dejected steps. My mom was going to kill me when I got back. I mean, I slammed the door, cut her off and practically just ditched her. And that wasn't even mentioning the fact that I couldn't even get a starter. It took a lot to earn her trust to let me handle things myself again and yet, not even a month had passed and I let her down.

“...ey!”

I groaned. This was gonna suck so much.

“Hey, Cygnus!”

My head perked up. Huh? Did someone just say my name? I looked around, turning my head left and right until I saw him.

Lucas, the professor’s assistant, was running at me. Lugging a briefcase in his hands and waving it recklessly. I opened my mouth to say something but after he nearly hit a nearby pedestrian a second time, I was afraid it would be me next.

He came to a stop, huffing and puffing. For a minute, I let him catch his breath before speaking. “What do you want?”

… that came out harsher than I'd like.

Thankfully, Lucas didn't look offended by my tone or maybe he just didn't notice it, he was clumsy like that. He propped up the briefcase, popping it open. “I just remembered that we had one left, Cygnus. A starter.”

My heart skipped a beat. Was I hearing him right?

“Y-you do?”

B-but I thought they said–no, questioning things might make this second chance disappear. I blinked, letting my gaze settle on the single pokéball inside, glee fluttering in my stomach.

“Yeah.” He took it out and handed it to me. “It might not be what you wanted but–”

“I'll take it!” I snatched the ball off of his hands. This was perfect! I had a starter! I finally had a starter! I was so happy I was bouncing on the soles of my feet, practically squeeing in joy.

Lucas chuckled softly, he was a lot less animated than he usually was but I was too distracted by the fact that I had my starter! “Well, I'm glad you're happy. But make sure to take good care of the little guy, alright?”

“Heh, who do you think I am? Of course I'll take good care of ‘em!” I shuffled my feet, pointing a finger to the sky. “‘cause you're looking at the next biggest thing! You hear me? I'll become one of the best there is! Even better than Cynthia herself!”

“Hah, sure.” His lips lifted slightly as he threw one last glance at the pokéball and he nodded. “Okay, I better head back now. The professor has plans for a big trip later and I'll have to finish some paperwork before we leave.”

“Okay, see ya!” I waved goodbye to the boy. Taking in a breath, I turned my attention back to the ball in my hand, feeling the smooth and hard surface. I couldn't believe it but the weight was real.

I had a starter.

My very own regional starter! Years of blood, sweat and tears put into this very moment!

Hopefully, Mom wouldn't be too mad once she learns about this.



“... and another thing!”

Mom turned around with eyes red with rage, her long brown hair trailing down to her shoulders like a serpent on the hunt.

I wilted under her fierce glare, my face paling further as her lecture continued. I knew she'd be mad but I didn't think she’d somehow stretch it into something that lasted for nearly an hour. At this rate, it’d take me until tomorrow to finally start my journey.

“... now, what do you have to say for yourself?”

“I'm sorry.”

“And?”

“I shouldn't slam doors in a hurry nor should I leave without finishing my food.” Her eyebrow was still raised. “And I should go to sleep early if I have to do something in the morning.”

“Good.” She nodded with a satisfied look. “Now, I hope you're fine with having reheated bacon and pancakes because that's what you'll be having after running off like that.”

I held back a sigh. “Okay, mom.” It wasn't the end of the world but it still felt unfair. It wasn't like I wanted to wake up late.

She tapped me on the shoulder, drawing my attention. Her gaze was soft, fond and comforting.

“Look, sweetie. I know how much you've been looking forward to this day and I'm happy you got your starter.” A gentle smile creased her features. “It’s just… next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”

Her eyes shimmered with genuine pride and– Argh, this wasn't fair. I couldn't continue to mope around with the sincerity thrown my way.

“Yeah, okay.” A small but genuine smile graced my face as she led me into the kitchen.



It was just past noon when I found myself looking over the field around me.

Route 202.

I’d been here before; for camping trips, survival training. Heck, I'd even snuck out from time to time with Terra to look at some Pokémon.

But today felt different.

Today, I stood out here as a trainer, alone on a path with only my starter to accompany me.

The pokéball in my hand gleamed under the sun’s rays and I couldn't help but smile. I'd taken a few minutes to familiarise myself with my starter back in my room. Even gave him a fitting name for a partner that was sure to follow me far!

Rearing back my hand, I tossed the ball up and with a loud noise, it popped open with a blinding beam of red.

Sun, my Chimchar, came out with a roar of his name, planting his fists deep into the dirt. He gave his surroundings a quick scan and after finding nothing of note, he turned to me with a puzzled expression. “Char?”

“Okay, Sun. As the starter of the up and coming future champion of Sinnoh–no the whole world! I am going to train you to be the very best! And that means we'll be spending every moment of our lives getting stronger! And to do so, we must first do what every famous trainer does when they're on a route.” I looked around, a smile stretching my cheeks as I pointed at our first opponent.

Out in the distance, in a clear field of patched dirt, there was a Starly pecking away at the ground.

I turned to Sun and relayed my plan. It was a simple one: hide in the bush and attack. Surely, I couldn't mess up an easy strategy.

My starter let out an affirmative cry, nodding along with my idea as he got into position.

Alright! Let's do this! I watched as Sun snuck up on it, hiding in the tall grass and slowly moving through until–

My Chimchar burst out of the grass and with a swift swing of his arm, slashed glowing claws across the Starly's face.

“Star!” the Starly cried out in pain, reeling away with a large flap of its wings.

It recovered in the air, wings fighting itself but instead of running away. It glared at Sun, eyes filled with a vengeful pride. Charging forward with a battle cry, its body glowed a fierce white, disappearing in a streak of light.

It's fast. I didn't have the chance to react before it struck my Chimchar hard, sending him flying into the dirt. It pressed on, body glowing and not wasting a single second as it readied another Tackle.

“Sun, Scratch it when it gets close!”

Sun got back up, jumping to his feet and claws glowing in a blind swing. The Starly was swifter however, reacting just in time to stop its momentum and flapping its wings to stay out of reach.

I clicked my tongue. Okay, a frontal attack wasn't working. It was just going to play keep away. Need to try something else.

“Leer! Then pin it when it's distracted!”

Sun’s eyes narrowed into slits, a dark shadow crossing his face. The Starly froze, an uncertainty marring the bird's confidence. My starter rushed forwards, lunging high, his arms locking the Starly’s wings and pinning it down.

I didn't hesitate as Sun slammed his head against it. My hand unclipped a free pokéball, throwing it forward as the Starly cried out in pain.

It connected, taking in the bird and letting Sun fall down onto the grass.

Then it shook.

Once. Twice and… yes!

With a ding to signify my success, I finally did it! I got my first capture!

Yes! My first official win as a trainer!

I whooped in joy and excitement, running forward and scooping up my starter by the arms. I twirled him around, spinning and laughing in celebration. “We did it, Sun! The start of our path to victory!”

If every battle went as smoothly as this, nobody would ever call me a loser anymore!

I set my starter down and picked up the ball. Time to make a new friend!

“Come on out!” Out came my newly-caught Starly and it immediately dived straight for me.

A yelp escaped me and I narrowly avoided a peck. I gritted my teeth, bringing my hands up to cover my face when I tripped. Luckily, Sun was quick to respond, subduing the Starly as it continued to fruitlessly peck and scratch me.

“Chimchar!” my starter growled out.

It struggled in my starter's grip, eyes glaring with rage. “Star! Star! Ly!” the Starly shouted, pointing at me with an accusatory talon.

“Char! Chim chim!” he shouted back, tightening his grip.

“Ly! Star!” It stopped attacking, fully committing all of its attention into the argument.

The two shouted at each other back and forth. Their argument grew more and more animated the longer it went. At this point, I already got back on my feet and was no closer to deciphering their speech than when I was on my back.

It eventually died down and Sun said something that managed to calm it down as he let go. He looked a lot more tired than he was after fighting.

I stood there, awkwardly looking down at the pouting Starly. “Uh, mind telling me what that was about?”

“Starly!” It puffed out its chest, crossing its wings and looking away with a huff.

“Um… yeah I've no clue what you just said.” I glanced at my starter who sighed and proceeded to mime out their argument.

He took on a boxer’s stance and threw a couple jabs.

“A fight?” He nodded, pointing at the Starly. “It wants to fight? No, something else? Fight something? No…” He pointed at the pokéball in my palm. Um... it wanted to fight my pokéball? No, that definitely wasn't it? But it had something to do with–

“Oh! It didn't want to be caught?”

“Starly!” It flew into my face, chirping loudly with an offended expression. It pointed at the pokéball and gestured to itself.

“You’re okay with being caught? Just not during a fight?” I tilted my head. “So what's the problem exactly?”

“Starly star!”

“Chim chim char.”

The two of them cried out in sync, and I could only stand there and watch as they tried their best to convey their needs.

Okay… This wasn't quite what I had in mind for my first day.



Alright.

As it turned out, the Starly just wanted a fight. That was mainly the reason why she had been standing out in the open to begin with.

And because I interfered in her fight against Sun by catching her, she got super mad at me.

At least that's what I thought. I was still a little unsure despite their attempts at translating but I guess the specifics weren't that important. Especially since I managed to convince her to forgive me in exchange for sending her out to fight a couple of battles.

After a quick little break and pondering, I decided to name my new friend, Klick, after a slang for measuring distances. Because like how Sun and I were going to be the brightest star in the world, Klick and I were going to go far!

Klick certainly lived up to her namesake. She was fast, agile, tough, and a real adrenaline junkie. Even after five battles, she was still raring to go. Currently, I was leading her against a Shinx. It was going surprisingly well, I didn't know what I expected when I threw her against an Electric-type but she was a lot more competent than I initially believed. Even without my commands, she was able to dodge and weave through its electric attacks, striking back at just the perfect moment to minimise the damage taken.

Up in the sky, her body glowed a sleeker stream of white, and she dived down, practically disappearing with how fast she moved.

Woah! My eyes lost track of her as she struck the Shinx, knocking it out cold. She landed beside me, holding her head high. “That was an awesome Quick Attack! All we need to do is to practice with it some more and nothing will ever hit you again.”

Klick puffed her chest out, letting out a prideful laugh.

“So, do you forgive me now?” I popped the question.

She made a ‘so-so’ motion with her wing but I took what I could get.

“Alright, now I'm gonna switch you out for Sun. I want him to get a little stronger before we head to the city.”

Hopefully, he could learn Ember before we leave for the city. It'd be a real drag if Scratch was the only move Sun had on him.

I retrieved Klick without any problems and sent Sun out, receiving a determined nod from him as we marched onward.

Hours went by with dozens of beaten Pokémon under my belt. Unfortunately, Sun hadn't quite figured out Ember but he somehow managed Taunt. I bit back the frustration, usually a Chimchar would learn Ember before anything else. I heaved a sigh as I made the tough call to start leaving for the city.

The Sun was slowly disappearing behind the horizon, painting the sky in a wide array of oranges and yellow. The city was slowly creeping into my vision and although it was still relatively bright out, the city was slowly lighting up. People and Pokémon of various sizes and shapes mingled under the evening sun with not a care in the world.

The smell hit my sinuses and I grimaced. Yup, that's Jubilife City for ya. Smoky and crisp with a tinge of charred tarmac. Nothing like the salty and ripe air of Sandgem.

Taking a minute to acclimate to the smell, I reached into my bag to pull out a notebook, flipping it open to reveal a checklist. Top priority, of course, was to go find the Pokémon center and register for the gym circuit. After that, I had to write down and double check the things I had to buy before heading for Oreburgh. Mostly potions, more pokéballs, and other miscellaneous utensils.

Probably need a plan for Roark too. A Starly and a Chimchar weren't the best picks for a Rock-type gym but I was sure I'd figure something out later. I flipped through the pages, landing on a small list of suitable encounters near Jubilife. A Budew would work swimmingly if I can find one, or maybe I could go the easy route and train up a Bidoof into Bibarel…

I jotted down the beginnings of a plan as I walked down the streets. The scratching of my pencil grounded me from being dragged around by the city’s noise, and it was always a nice feeling writing down my thoughts.

“Ohohoho! Do my eyes deceive me?”

My hands froze and as my mind fully processed the familiar voice, I tried to reign in my reactions, acting like I didn't hear it. My legs carried me onward, my steps hurrying, maybe if I acted natural she wouldn't–

“Ack!”

An arm wrung around my neck, bringing my head close to an annoyingly familiar warmth. “Cygnie, it is you! I was wondering where you've been. Thought ya forgot what day it was when I didn't see you at the professor earlier!”

I shuffled out of her grasp, glaring with as much irritation as I could possibly muster at the grinning redhead. “Terra.”

“Cygnus,” she said, not at all phased as she copied my annoyed tone with that cheeky smirk.

Terra was a girl, an annoying redhead with long straight hair that hung down to the middle of her back. Her face held her signature smirk, infuriatingly smug and joyous. Her outfit today was… cute, a pretty blue dress that complimented her dainty and delicate figure. It could do without the comically large sunhat though, it made her look like she was more ready for a picnic than a journey.

A sigh escaped my lips. “What do you want?”

“Whaaat? Why do I need something from you to check up on my favouritest rival?” Terra tried to wrap her arm around my neck again but I dodged, leaning away as she continued speaking, undeterred by the attempt. “Y’know, I really did think you weren't gonna make it. Like, you even missed out on our meet-up! And that wasn't mentioning how you flaked on our first rival battle too! You know it's tradition to have your first fight be your rival!”

Was it tradition to have a clingy girl always following him around? But… I guess I did promise something like that. I clenched my fist, pointing a finger at her. “Alright, fine! Let's go then!”

She gasped, her smile somehow became even brighter as she suddenly clasped my hand, her eyelashes fluttering. “Great! Come on, I'll even buy you dinner after I win!”

My traitorous heart skipped a beat at the contact and warmth crept onto my cheeks. “Af-after I win!” I shouted, shoving down that weird warm feeling down the recesses of my mind and trying to regain some face.

“That's the spirit!” She laughed, dragging me by the arm.

I bristled at the contact. “He-hey, I can walk myself!” I tried to pull away but she was a lot stronger than she looked.

“I know.” Her voice was smug and I sputtered out a protest.

In the end, I resigned myself to the ball of energy that was my friend rival. The two of us walked down the streets, hands clasped together as Terra gestured and pointed to the various stores and places around them, talking about how we should check them out after we were done with the battle.

Eventually, we made our way to a stadium of sorts. It was a massive building, covering what must be hundreds of meters of land. There were trainers everywhere, some were battling, training, even a few talking about trading but the majority were just chatting and talking about nothing in particular. Though I could somewhat make out important bits and pieces here and there. Battle plans, advice, complimenting each other’s team, most of it generally about how excited they were to finally begin their journey.

I couldn't focus on much on the actual important parts though when Terra let go of my hand, jumping and waving.

“Yoohoo, Rachel! Over here!”

Leaning against the walls of the building was a blonde girl, she looked a bit older than us, probably a year or so. Though it could also be because of her height, she was a noticeable head taller than me… not that I was jealous of something as stupid as that. My eyes glanced over to Terra, noting that she was still a few inches taller.

Definitely not.

Rachel looked over to us in surprise before she schooled her expression into a composed smile. She walked on over, her stride as confident and cool as the outfit she wore. A leather jacket draped over a black shirt that showed off her midriff and a pair of short jeans. “Yo, Terra! You back for more?”

“Nope. Not this time. Let me introduce you to my bestest and coolest rival! Cygnus Plein!”

I flinched when Rachel turned her gaze towards me. Suddenly I was back in school again, remembering how Terra dragged me in front of class to introduce myself, the judging gazes, the cruel gleam in their smiles– Snap out of it! This is different. She's a person that knows nothing about you! Come on, think of a cool introduction!

“Uh… hi.”

The words came out as stiff as the hand I waved at her. The grin I forced on my face was brittle but it sufficed to distract for the utter cringe my thoughts were swimming in.

Aaaaahh! Really? That was the best I could come up with? Seriously? Am I trying to make her think I'm an idiot that doesn't know how to talk? Aaaaaaahhhh...

“Hi to you too, little dude,” she said, completely unaware of my internal struggles. Rachel winked at me, quiet understanding dancing in her blue eyes as if to say she knew what it was like to be dragged by the whirlwind that was Terra.

And speaking of said whirlwind, Terra diverted our attention with a loud clap of her hands. “Alright! Now that we're all acquainted, you mind playing ref for us, Rachel? It's our first rival battle and well, you know how it is.”

Rachel mulled over the question for a bit, shrugging as she said, “Sure, got nothing better to do.”

Mysterious and cool jacket-rocking girl as referee? Now I couldn't afford to lose.

“Awesome!” Terra turned to me, pulling out a pokéball. “Let's go, standard 1v1 ruleset, capiche?”

I nodded as she dragged me to one of the fields. With a quiet staredown, a spark fizzled between our gaze as an unheard agreement was shared between us.

We took our positions as Rachel stood by the field, arm raised.

“Three.”

My fingers hovered over my starter's ball.

“Two.”

Terra grinned, bouncing with untethered energy.

“And begin!”

Rachel swung her arm down, signalling the start of our battle.

I unclipped my pokéball and we tossed out our starters at the same time.

“Let's do this, Sun!”

“Time to drown ‘em, Bubbles!”

My Chimchar slammed his fists on the ground at the same time her Piplup sprung into battle, a determined gleam in both their eyes.

A Piplup. Of course, she'd pick a Piplup. Whatever. Type advantage wouldn't matter if I planned this smartly.

“Leer!”

“Nuh uh, Growl!” She chuckled, shaking her finger at me. “No debuffs for you!”

I grimaced, one step ahead as usual. Fine, we were at a standstill and she had a bigger advantage over me anyway. “Taunt and then another Leer!”

Sun cocked a grin, mouthing off what I imagined must be the mother of all insults with how red the Piplup’s face was becoming. Bubbles looked absolutely livid and it was a little weird seeing such an unusually aggressive expression on its cutesy face.

“Ooh!” Terra’s smile widened as if she’d received a welcoming surprise. She snapped her fingers, pumping her hands in the air. “Bubbles, try and hold that righteous wrath in, okay? We'll be doing your specialty real soon, Pound!”

“Scratch!”

Sun reared low, claws glowing as Bubbles rushed forwards in a burst of rage, swinging its glowing wings with aggression that belied its cute appearance. My starter struck back, parrying each blow without giving Bubbles an inch.

With an angry shout, Bubbles hastened his swings and Sun responded in earnest. I tried to think of something but aside from telling him to keep Scratching, there wasn't much I could think of as Leer was an easy way to let Sun get overwhelmed.

Terra hollered, mimicking a boxer as she hopped back and forth. “Alright, why don't we kick it up a notch? Bubbles Bubble him!”

My breath hitched as I hissed out a curse. It already knew Bubble? Are you kidding me?!

“Jump back to avoid it and then get back in when it stops!”

“Dual wield! Go go, Bubbles! Don't let him get another hit!”

Dual wield? The hell does that even mean?

Sun leapt away, managing to evade the oncoming bubbles. He rushed in, claws glowing but before he could even land a hit, Bubbles struck back with a Pound, knocking him away and continuing its bubbling assault.

Although Sun was quicker on his feet, being able to dodge a majority of Bubbles’ attacks. Bubbles simply did too much damage for him to handle. Each landed hit from Sun resulted in him getting scraped, grazed by either a glowing flipper or an exploding bubble.

I didn't have many options and Leer was too risky with all those bubbles. Sun was getting exhausted, visibly heaving and body shaking. It didn't take long before he made a misstep, and Bubbles didn't even hesitate to punish him, knocking out my starter in an instant.

As Sun fell to the ground, I returned my starter with a grumble. Another loss. I didn't know why I expected things to be different when we got our starters but it seemed like Terra was still several steps ahead of me.

It stung as badly as the rest. I hated this feeling. The bitter taste of defeat lingered on my tongue. But I didn't let myself succumb to it, I couldn't let it get to me. I just had to try harder next time.

“Cygnus’ Chimchar has been defeated. Victory goes to Terra!” Rachel announced, bringing me back to reality.

“And another flawless victory for Terra the Terrific!” Terra shouted, cupping her hands around her mouth. “And the crowd goes wild! Haa! Haa! Woo! That was fun! You’re a lot stronger than I expected.”

She was posing, her Piplup also joined in as well. They moved in sync like they practiced this routine dozens of times before. Knowing her, she probably did.

Terra walked up to me. It wasn't for money, she vehemently despised taking money for a win. But the mischievous grin on her face told me she was scheming something as she held up a hand. “Give me five!”

I stared at her hand and back to her face.

She stared back, unflinching but deep down, I recognised the mischievous glint barely showing in her eyes. Terra was planning something.

For a second our eyes met, her amber gaze meeting my green glare. I'd like to say that I stood my ground, and was as unflinching as she was. But as I stared into those pretty innocent eyes, my composure crumbled and I raised a reluctant hand.

“Got you!”

It was a trap! I couldn't retract my hand in time before she wrapped her hand around it. I stumbled back but she held me steady before planting a fist on my head as I struggled in her grasp.

After what felt like an excruciating hour of embarrassment, she relented with a cheeky grin, hand still clasped on mine.

“Ahem, now what do we say after battling?” She lowered my arm, intertwining her fingers around mine. Her eyes locked onto mine, gleaming under the twilight sky with a mischievous yet kind twinkle. Her pearl white teeth baring in a grin that bore a teasing joy.

She's so close.

Warmth rushed to my cheeks as I pushed that thought away, focusing on anything but the softness around my hand. “Good game?”

My rival beamed, looking satisfied with my answer as she raised her free hand. “Bye Rachel! I'll see you tomorrow!” She turned back to me, dragging me by the arm. “Come on, I know a place that has the absolute bestest curry!”

Before I could protest, my stomach grumbled, stymying the words before they could form as a different type of warmth crept to my cheeks. Resigning myself to the hurricane in human form, I cast one last pleading glance towards Rachel, mouthing silent words of help.

But the cruel blonde only watched with a delighted smile as if this whole thing was a play and I was starring as the unfortunate protagonist.
 
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Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. growlithe
  6. quilava-fobbie
  7. sneasel-kate
  8. heliolisk-fobbie
  9. axew-irune
Heya, sorry for running late, though I’m here for Catnip. Though I see you have a fresh story, which is apparently a Nuzlocke/death loop narrative. That’s certainly different from what I’m used to from you, so let’s just hop in and see how things are going here:

Chapter 1

Everything hurts.

White hot pain laced across my mind, scattering my thoughts and spinning the world around me. My vision dimmed and muted, sounds grew muffled and distant..

Somebody…

My eyes trailed onto the graying world around me.

Oh hey, I know what’s going on here:

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Please…

I still had so much I wanted to do.

Yeah, I figured. Though if I had a nickel for every story I’ve read from you that had its protagonist die and then come back in literally the first chapter, I’d have two nickels.

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision, coiling slowly, slowly, seizing me like a prized possession.

Help…

I’m not really feeling the underlined as a point of comparison. I wonder if it’d have been more impactful if you rolled something that was more “visual” as a comparison.

My body was trembling but I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel my arms nor my legs. Warmth fled my body a long time ago, leaving the hard and cold concrete to chill me down to my very bones.

I was so tired… so… so…

Cygnus: “Dead. I know. Don’t remind me.”
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Someone…

I tried to cry out.

But no one replied.

There were sirens, muffled screams and tears.

Damn son, just what sort of mess did you get yourself into before kicking the bucket? And here I thought you were bleeding out in the boonies or something.

I do wonder if it’d have been worth tipping your hand a bit more as to where Cygnus is and what’s going on with him for context if it’s not a giant spoiler, since I’ll admit that things are a bit vague for how we got here at the moment.

Everything felt hollow, empty.

And slowly, slowly…

… my consciousness slipped away into the darkness…



My alarm clock blared with a roar of a thousand howls.

Getting some prime PMMM EP 1 vibes here. Even if I doubt there’s going to be a whole harvesting souls to stave off cosmic entropy angle to this story, I do wonder what’s causing this in-setting.

I awoke with a startled yelp, panic gripping my heart as I flailed my arms and legs. Unfortunately, the blanket covering me did an amazing job in trapping my limbs and I performed an excellent tumble onto the firm wood that was the floor.

“Ow…” I winced, a dull ache pounding my head relentlessly despite the blanket breaking my fall. With a groan, I threw the blanket back onto the bed, rubbing a hand against the bump in my head as I got up. “My head…”

Cygnus: “Did… Did I just dream all of that?”
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My mind was still groggy but the pain kept my focus from slipping back into the foggy recesses of sleep. I found myself sitting there on the floor, thoughts still reeling from that… that dream? I mean, what else was there to call that? But that dream felt so vivid, so real in a sense that was hard to describe. I swore I could still feel myself laying there on the cold concrete, a tingly sensation seizing my body and ridding me of feeling anything but fog and numbness. I was pretty sure I also heard something that sounded like crying…

Narrator: “It was not a dream.”

Though I wonder if that means that Cygnus died at the first gym in his last loop for this journey.

A sharp sting punctured my attempts at remembering and I winced, silencing the alarm clock. But even without that incessant shrill, I couldn't get a grip on anything but the barest of fragments.

I shuddered, feeling cold despite the morning sun shining from my window. Even with only the vaguest of details, I couldn't get over how… real everything felt. Like I was still laying there, cold, alone, dying

Cygnus: “Boy it sure would be nice if I could’ve remembered where I died in my dream, since that was some Final Destination-tier stuff going on there.”
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Tearing my head away from the dream, I looked around. To my left was a window, and for some stupid reason, I seemed to have left the curtains open, leading to the brilliant sun practically blinding me wherever I turned. My bed was messy, my blanket and pillows scattered and strewn about after my panicked wake up. The ticking of my alarm clock followed my every motion, the time flashing innocently under my gaze.

… Wait.

Wait a second…

I blinked, once, twice. But the number was still the same, still the bright red lights showing–

Oh no. Oh no no no.

It was eight.

I take it that Cygnus has pulled an Ash here. Though I do wonder if it’d have made sense to just say what the time was before his whole panicking reaction here.

Eight freaking thirty.

Oh crap oh crap!

I was late!

So incredibly late!

I have the March Hare’s ditty from Alice in Wonderland stuck in my head right now, and at this rate, Cygnus probably does too. :V

How? Why did my alarm clock wake me up so late? I thought I'd set it to ring at six! Aaaahh, this was bad. This was really bad.

Just saying, if you’re sufficiently sleep deprived, or if it’s just a side effect of time rewinding, that’d do the trick, Cygnus.

I rushed into the bathroom, speeding through the process of cleaning myself. I didn't have time to waste here, I was late for my starter!

So, is he also going to get stuck with a Pikachu by the local Professor.

Amidst the panic, a stray thought crept onto my mind. My rival, Terra, must've gotten her starter already. We were talking about this day for the better half of the month, even agreeing to meet up before heading to the lab. If she knew the reason why I wasn't there, she'd never let me live this down.

Ah yes, I see we’re doing all the Ash parallels right now. I take it that we’re going to get some pretty cruel subversions down the road given that this story’s apparently a Nuzlocke tale.

After combing down the Rattata’s nest that was my shaggy brown hair into something respectable, I put on a simple red T-shirt and a pair of brown trousers… or well, tried to. It was admittedly hard to do so when I was running down the stairs. And like an idiot, I promptly lost my balance and fell straight down.

Thankfully, my back broke my fall.

Unfortunately, my back was now in pain.

Cygnus: “... Ow.
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“Are you okay, dear?” my mom shouted from the kitchen, concerned.

“I'm fine, mom!” I couldn't stop now. Standing back up, I successfully wrestled my leg down my pants and grabbed my bag hanging on the railing.

“Well, come and get breakfast, Cygnus. It's gonna get cold if you–”

“Sorry, Mom!” I shouted back. “But I gotta go! I'm already late for my starter! Bye, Mom!”

Boy, that must’ve been particularly cursed in the last loop given that that might’ve very well been the last words Cygnus got out before keeling over.

“Cygnus–”

Slamming the door behind me, I sprinted towards my destination. Knowing my mom, she’d find a way to convince me to stay but I needed my starter. I couldn't be late!

I… think it might have been worth being a bit clearer about how far Cygnus had to go to get out the door. Like I take it that the house’s stairs end right next to the door from how quickly he dips out afterwards, but it’d have been nice to have that described a bit more explicitly.

The morning air was dry and fresh, luckily we lived somewhere deeper in Sandgem so I didn't have to trudge through sand whenever I decided to go outside. People mingled about in the streets but thankfully as the day was still young, I didn't have a lot of people I had to worry about. “Sorry! Excuse me! Coming through!” I waded through, finding my opportunity to slip past the steady stream of people and into an alleyway.

I lived in Sandgem Town for practically my entire life so I knew the ins and outs of the place, and the fastest routes to reach the lab. I just had to get through this alleyway, past the park, and I'd be at the Pokémon center where–

Ah, so this is a Sinnoh story. I suppose that explains the “Lost in Distortions” title.

Something stopped me dead still, my momentum ramming straight into and down onto the ground. I winced at the stinging pain in my nose as I fell right onto my butt. “Ow…”

What hit me? There wasn't supposed to be anyone in this alleyway, not with all the trash and gunk. I got back up, a hand rubbing my sore behind as I gave whoever stood in my way a glare.

The man who stared back with a pinched expression froze me right into my roots. He was tall, taller than the professor by half a head and practically twice my height. My breath hitched. The man looked dead, pale as a corpse. His cheeks were sunken, his eyes surrounded by dark rings like he hadn't slept in weeks. Despite his height, he was a skinny and lanky person, more bone than flesh with how his skin-tight suit stretched into his skin.

Oh no, it’s Slenderman.
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The sun cast an ominous shadow over him, and his eyes gleamed like silver under the dim lighting. His glare was intense, harshly fierce like he was inspecting a particularly pesky bug.

I took a step back. Who-who was this? Did I just find a ghost? The guy didn't look real. How could a man have bleached blue hair while having skin paler than even Mom? Not to mention the weird outfit like he was trying to cosplay a really weird astronaut.

Oh, it’s Cyrus. Boy is that an ominous way to kick off one’s Pokémon journey. Even if I’m starting to wonder if Cygnus had some divine intervention with that rewinding of time he apparently went through.

The man was quiet, unnaturally still like a broken down machine. I could feel my heart racing as the nerves shook my body. “I–I’m sorry, sir,” I stammered out. “I wasn't looking at where I was going and I uh…”

What should I say? What could I say? I didn't even know if he was going to kill me, eat my brain or… or… His glare didn't diminish in its intensity. And it was horrifying how expressionless his face looked, like he actually was a corpse that somehow retained consciousness.

And yet he managed to max out his Crobat’s friendship stat… somehow. :copyka:

After what felt like hours of being examined like a lab rat, he finally nodded, leaving without a word and not a single one of his steps making a sound.

Cygnus: “Thank goodness I’m never going to see that creep again.”
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When he got out of my sight, I flopped over and fell onto my knees. My heart was racing, my breaths laboured and heavy. “O-okay, scary ghosts in jumpsuits are a thing now.” I joked, more out of habit than anything humourous. My eyes glanced over to where the man vanished into and I stamped down the part of my mind that was curious about who that was.

Though oddly I couldn't help but feel like there was something familiar about the man. Like I had met him before.

Oh, so that’s how Cygnus’ last death went, huh? Though given that he heard sirens, I’m guessing that he didn’t make it anywhere close to Mount Coronet before he bit it. :copyka:

I shook my head. No! I was not going down a spooky alleyway, chasing after a shady skeleton man. That sounded like a horrible idea.

And how considering that you’re very, very much not prepared to take on Cyrus at the moment. ^^;

Taking in deep, calming breaths, I let the nerves run through its course before returning to the task at hand. I had to keep going. I still had a starter to get.

A lot slower though. Who knew if there were any more scary jumpsuit ghosts out there.

Oh, you don’t know that half of it, Cygnus.

I… made it.

Professor Rowan’s lab! I reached it!

“Ah…” I panted, pushing open the door. “I'm… I'm here!”

inb4 he’s cleared out of starters for the day.

My exhausted shout drew the attention of everyone towards me. The lab assistants chatting to each other, the janitor cleaning in the corner and more notably, Professor Rowan and Lucas turned away from their conversation to look at me, neither of whom bothered to hide their surprise.

Oh, so Lucas is Rowan’s assistant in this continuity, huh? I wonder if there’s also a Dawn or not.

My lungs felt like they were on fire as my legs dragged me across the room. I really shouldn't have skipped gym class. Ugh, I regretted everything!

“I'm… I'm not too late, right?”

Rowan and Lucas glanced at one another. The professor’s fuzzy eyebrows furrowed in displeasure or well… It was honestly a little hard to gauge his reaction since his default expression looked like he was always displeased about everything.

Shots fired. Though at least he looks less perpetually angry than the likes of Drayden? ^^;

Lucas, though, was a lot more expressive. An uncomfortable frown lining his face as he turned. “Well, you are over two hours later than expected.” He forced out a chuckle. “We didn't think you’d even show up.”

“And I did! I’m right here, aren't I?” I panted. “Please please please please tell me you have a starter left!”

Lol. Lmao. I don’t know what the Sinnohan equivalent of getting a Pikachu dumped on you is, but I suppose we’re about to find out.

Lucas turned to the professor, his eyes asking for help that his mouth was too afraid to voice.

The professor sighed, stepping forward with a stern glare. “You were late.”

TL/DR: No starter for you, Cygnus.

Receiving his full attention, I stepped back, feeling the words stuck in my throat. “It-it wasn't on purpose, Professor! I was just so excited to start my journey that I couldn't sleep and–and my alarm clock didn't wake me up even though I was sure I set it and–”

He held up a hand. “I'm sorry, Cygnus. I handed out the last of my starters over an hour ago.”

Wh-what?

Let’s check in on how Cygnus is doing right now:

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“No… this can't be...” I must've heard him wrong. He couldn't be out, he couldn't!

“Cygnus. You were nearly three hours late,” he said, body unmoving like a statue. “Now I understand what it's like to receive your first Pokémon, let alone something as rare as a regional starter and while I could excuse being a bit later than the planned meet up.” He sighed. “I cannot excuse someone for being later than an hour, let alone three. And you should know that I am a very busy man, I don't have time to waste merely standing around.”

Harsh, but he’s not wrong. Especially when in life, you’re lucky to get people waiting for you for 30 minutes for anything related to a business or commercial transaction.

I could hardly hear the end of his speech over the raging denials swirling in my head. This couldn't be real. It just couldn't be. All that time spent waiting, all that hard work and effort spent studying to even get a chance at this, all my plans and dreams. All of it was going to waste because I couldn't wake up.

I…

Tears welled up in my eyes but I dropped my head to hide them. Now wasn't the time nor place. I couldn't let them see me like this.

Wait, wait, wait. How old is Cygnus anyways? Since just saying, most schoolkids I can think of would pretty openly cry about getting their dreams smashed like this.

“Yeah… I guess…” I managed to make it not sound like I was about to break apart.

The professor took in a breath, his voice softening. [ ]

Look, boy. I could try asking for another batch but I can't guarantee it'll be here before next week.”

Next week? I hid the grimace behind a sigh. I'd be so far behind but it was better than nothing. Professor Rowan was giving me a chance here.

I feel like it makes sense to expand on Rowan’s reaction here. Though I suppose that’s one sign that Cygnus is definitely a young’un, since being delayed by a week is significantly less of an inherent “world is ending” thing once you’re getting up into adulthood, but I can buy it seeming that way to a kid.

I bowed low, a textbook perfect ninety degrees angle and showing my sincerest gratitude to the professor. “Thank you.”

With those quiet words, I took my leave with hurried steps, only slowing down after I was a couple of blocks away from the lab. My vision was blurry with tears but I didn't need to see properly to keep walking.

“Damn it.”

Whelp, looks like you’re going to be going straight back home and doing homework and watching cartoons for a week. Or at least you would be if your author didn’t have anything to say about it, even if I wonder how on earth you’ll get out of this one here.

I clenched a fist, the despair quickly turning into rage as I rounded into an alleyway. My feet collided with a piece of trash and that broke down my self-control as I kicked a nearby bin. Nrgh! I was mad, so damn pissed at myself for being such an idiot.

If I hadn't stayed up so late, if I had set my alarm properly, if I hadn't woken up so late! I would've gotten my starter already and beaten my rival to the curb! What was wrong with me? I knew today was gonna be the greatest day of my life and yet–

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“Aaaaahhh!”

I didn't know how long I'd spent venting my frustrations on the poor things here. But I was tired and hungry, my stomach protesting my poor decisions as I left the alleyway. I wasn't looking forward to my mom’s scolding but I didn't have a choice. She’d get worse if I spent more time out here without anything to show for.

“...!”

I sighed, dragging my feet into slow and dejected steps. My mom was going to kill me when I got back. I mean, I slammed the door, cut her off and practically just ditched her. And that wasn't even mentioning the fact that I couldn't even get a starter. It took a lot to earn her trust to let me handle things myself again and yet, not even a month had passed and I let her down.

Small verb tense error. Also, I feel like the dialogue-less line here is superfluous.

“...ey!”

I groaned. This was gonna suck so much.

“Hey, Cygnus!”

My head perked up. Huh? Did someone just say my name? I looked around, turning my head left and right until I saw him.

Cygnus: “Wait, I saw who now-?”

Lucas, the professor’s assistant, was running at me. Lugging a briefcase in his hands and waving it recklessly. I opened my mouth to say something but after he nearly hit a nearby pedestrian a second time, I was afraid it would be me next.

He came to a stop, huffing and puffing. For a minute, I let him catch his breath before speaking. “What do you want?”

… that came out harsher than I'd like.

Oh, Cygnus is going to wind up getting a starter after all, huh? Since I recognize that briefcase.

Thankfully, Lucas didn't look offended by my tone or maybe he just didn't notice it, he was clumsy like that. He propped up the briefcase, popping it open. “I just remembered that we had one left, Cygnus. A starter.”

[ ]

“Y-you do?”

I think that it probably would’ve been worth showing off a bit more of Cygnus’ thought process here since he’s getting a very abrupt positive surprise that he wasn’t expecting and it’d have been interesting to see the cogs turn in his head a bit more.

Though wait, was there really another starter waiting around all this time, or is this just the leftover from the batch that Dawn and Barry went through?

Huh? But I thought they said–no, questioning things might make this second chance disappear. I blinked, letting my gaze settle on the single pokéball inside, glee fluttering in my stomach.

“Yeah.” He took it out and handed it to me. “It might not be what you wanted but–”

“I'll take it!” I snatched the ball off of his hands. This was perfect! I had a starter! I finally had a starter! I was so happy I was bouncing on the soles of my feet, practically squeeing in joy.

Lucas chuckled softly, he was a lot less animated than he usually was but I was too distracted by the fact that I had my starter! “Well, I'm glad you're happy. But make sure to take good care of the little guy, alright?”

Okay, yeah, this is totally that starter that Dawn and Barry didn’t take. Even if that kinda sucks for Lucas given that that means that now he’s without a Pokémon unless he caught something on top of whoever this is since then.

“Heh, who do you think I am? Of course I'll take good care of ‘em!” I shuffled my feet, pointing a finger to the sky. “‘cause you're looking at the next biggest thing! You hear me? I'll become one of the best there is! Even better than Cynthia herself!”

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“Hah, sure.” His lips lifted slightly as he threw one last glance at the pokéball and he nodded. “Okay, I better head back now. The professor has plans for a big trip later and I'll have to finish some paperwork before we leave.”

Oh boy must that have sucked for Lucas in the last loop. Give away your Pokémon to the late kid, who just turns around and gets it and himself killed the very next day. :copyka:

“Okay, see ya!” I waved goodbye to the boy. Taking in a breath, I turned my attention back to the ball in my hand, feeling the smooth and hard surface. I couldn't believe it but the weight was real.

I had a starter.

My very own… [ ]

Hopefully, Mom wouldn't be too mad once she learns about this.

I feel like the spot in brackets might have been worth seeing more of Cygnus’ thought process. Though cue his mom being livid in 3… 2…

“...and another thing!”

Mom turned around with eyes red with rage, her long brown hair trailing down to her shoulders like a serpent on the hunt.

Yeah, I figured. :mewlulz:

I wilted under her fierce glare, my face paling further as her lecture continued. I knew she'd be mad but I didn't think she’d somehow stretch it into something that lasted for nearly an hour. At this rate, it’d take me until tomorrow to finally start my journey.

“... now, what do you have to say for yourself?”

“I'm sorry.”

“And?”

Cygnus: “... Wait, I was supposed to say more?”
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Though I do wonder if it’d have been worth using the narration to elaborate a bit on what exactly the general topic of Cygnus’ mom’s lecture was about, since it’s admittedly a bit vague ATM.

“I shouldn't slam doors in a hurry nor should I leave without finishing my food.” Her eyebrow was still raised. “And I should go to sleep early if I have to do something in the morning.”

“Good.” She nodded with a satisfied look. “Now, I hope you're fine with having reheated bacon and pancakes because that's what you'll be having after running off like that.”

Oh, well, nevermind, there’s the explanation there.

I held back a sigh. It wasn't the end of the world – “Okay, mom.” – but it still felt unfair. It wasn't like I wanted to wake up late.

Not really feeling the inline comment there. I would recommend at minimum moving the “It wasn’t the end of the world” part after the line from Cygnus there.

She tapped me on the shoulder, drawing my attention. [ ]

Look, sweetie. I know how much you've been looking forward to this day and I'm happy you got your starter.” A gentle smile creased her features. “It’s just… next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”

Would recommend splitting this and expanding on the reaction of Cygnus’ mom here a bit.

Her eyes shimmered with genuine pride and– Argh, this wasn't fair. I couldn't continue to mope around with the sincerity thrown my way.

“Yeah, okay.” A small but genuine smile graced my face as she led me into the kitchen.

Ah yes, reheated pancakes and bacon. The breakfast of champions™

It was just past noon when I found myself looking over the field around me.

Route 202.

I’d been here before; for camping trips, survival training. Heck, I'd even snuck out from time to time with Terra to look at some Pokémon.

But today felt different.

So, just how quickly are things going to become a disaster given how quickly Cygnus’ last attempt at being a trainer went sideways?
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Today, I stood out here as a trainer, alone on a path with only my starter to accompany me.

The pokéball in my hand gleamed under the sun’s rays as I threw it open.

Sun, my Chimchar, came out with a roar of his name, planting his fists deep into the dirt. He gave his surroundings a quick scan and after finding nothing of note, he turned to me with a puzzled expression. “Char?”

I wonder if Chimchar’s mannerisms will be obvious enough for it to become apparent that he’s used to taking orders from a very different face. Not that Cygnus is likely to realize that until much later on.

“Okay, Sun. As the starter of the up and coming future champion of Sinnoh–no the whole world! I am going to train you to be the very best! And that means we'll be spending every moment of our lives getting stronger! And to do so, we must first do what every famous trainer does when they're on a route.” I looked around, a smile stretching my cheeks as I pointed at our first opponent.

Is that supposed to be Cygnus’ nickname for Chimchar, there? If so, it probably makes sense to establish in narration before this that that’s what Cygnus was doing and a bit of his thought process behind the name choice.

Out in the distance, in a clear field of patched dirt, there was a Starly pecking away at the ground.

I turned to Sun and relayed my plan.

My starter let out an affirmative cry, nodding along with my strategy.

Which was…? Like I get that it doesn’t make sense to go into super detail about a strategy here before it executes, but I do wonder if there should’ve been at least a general description either in the narration or via Cygnus’ dialogue.

Alright! Let's do this! I watched as Sun snuck up on it, using the tall grass to his advantage until–

“Star!” The Starly cried out in pain, reeling away as Sun clawed it across its face.

It recovered fast from the surprise attack, but instead of running away. It glared at Sun, eyes filled with a vengeful pride. Charging forward with a battle cry, its body glowed a fierce white.

I feel like some of the underlined should’ve come a bit earlier, even if it was in an “immediately after the Starly’s cry” capacity, since I’m not sure if I’m feeling the implicit reveal that Sun snuck up on the Starly in the present dialogue.

It's fast. I didn't have the chance to react before it struck my Chimchar hard, sending him flying into the dirt. It pressed on, not wasting its opportunity as it readied another Tackle.

“Sun, Scratch it when it gets close!”

Sun stood back up, trying to retaliate but the Starly was swifter, evading his swings and staying back.

I clicked my tongue. A frontal attack wasn't working. Need to try something else.

I feel like we’re not really getting a good enough visualization of how this is playing out, since it feels very high-level and summarized at the moment.

“Leer! Then pin it when it's distracted!”

Sun’s eyes narrowed into slits, a dark look crossing his face. The Starly froze, an uncertainty marring the bird’s confidence. My starter took the opportunity to rush forward, arms locking the Starly’s wings and pinning it down.

I didn't hesitate as Sun slammed his head against it. My hand unclipped a free pokéball, throwing it forward as the Starly cried out in pain.

It connected, taking in the bird and letting Sun fall down onto the grass.

Ditto here, though as an immediate fix, you seem to be missing a word in front of ‘confidence’ there.

Then it shook.

Once. Twice and… yes!

With a ding to signify my success, I finally did it! I got my first capture!

Oh, so the Pokéballs in this setting make the same chime that they do in PokéAni. I suppose that would definitely be a bit easier to hear from a distance than the “click” noise they do in the games.

Yes! My first official win as a trainer!

I whooped in joy and excitement, running forward and scooping up my starter by the arms. I twirled him around, spinning and laughing in celebration. “We did it, Sun! The start of our path to victory!”

If every battle went as smoothly as this, nobody would ever call me a loser anymore!

Once again:
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I set my starter down and picked up the ball. Time to make a new friend!

Um… Cygnus? Just saying, if the Starly went into the ball crabby, what’s going to keep it from-?

“Come on out!” Out came my newly-caught Starly and it immediately dived straight for me.

Yeah, that.

A yelp escaped me and I narrowly avoided a peck. I gritted my teeth, bringing my hands up to cover my face when I tripped. Luckily, Sun was quick to respond, subduing the Starly as it continued to fruitlessly peck and scratch me.

“Chimchar!” my starter growled out.

Yeeeeeeeah, should’ve waited a bit more for that bird to calm down, Cygnus. Though per the rules of Nuzlockes, congratulations on your second party member.

[ ]

“Star! Star! Ly!” the Starly shouted, pointing at me with an accusatory talon.

“Char! Chim chim!” he shouted back, tightening his grip.

“Ly! Star!” It stopped attacking, fully committing all of its attention into the argument.

Wait, the Starly is doing this in the middle of attempting to peck and scratch Cygnus? Or is it calming down and backing off? Since something about this feels like it’s missing a transition here.

The two shouted at each other back and forth. Their argument grew more and more animated the longer it went. At this point, I already got back on my feet and was no closer to deciphering their speech than when I was on my back.

I think that’s a sign to go and fetch some birdseed to try and work on smoothing things over with that new catch of yours. ^^;

It eventually died down and Sun said something that managed to calm it down as he let go. He looked a lot more tired than he was after fighting.

I mean, I would too if I was forced to abruptly serve as team counsellor on top of having to throw down, to boot.

I stood there, awkwardly looking down at the pouting Starly. “Uh, mind telling me what that was about?”

“Starly!” It puffed out its chest, crossing its wings and looking away with a huff.

“Um… yeah I've no clue what you just said.” I glanced at my starter who sighed and proceeded to mime out their argument.

I’m pretty sure that was something to the effect of “Piss off, brat, you don’t own me.”

He took on a boxer’s stance and threw a couple jabs.

“A fight?” He nodded, pointing at the Starly. “It wants to fight? No, something else? Fight something? No…”

He pointed at the pokéball in my palm. [ ]

It didn't want to be caught?”

I think that Cygnus’ thought process here should be a bit more of a process since he zeroes in very abruptly on “oh, it didn’t want to be caught” in spite of starting out fairly distant from that conclusion at the beginning.

“Starly!” It flew into my face, chirping loudly with an offended expression. It pointed at the pokéball and gestured to itself.

“You’re okay with being caught? Just not during a fight?” I tilted my head. “So what's the problem exactly?”

“Starly star!”

“Chim chim char.”

The two of them cried out in sync, and I could only stand there and watch as they tried their best to convey their needs.

Okay… This wasn't quite what I had in mind for my first day.

Cygnus: “Um… I don’t suppose you two could try drawing things out for clarity? Since I’m not sure the readers will really get what’s going on either.” ^^;

Alright.

As it turned out, the Starly just wanted a fight. That was mainly the reason why she had been standing out in the open to begin with.

And because I interfered in her fight against Sun by catching her, she got super mad at me.

Starly: “*So… are you going to let me go, or…?*” >v>;

At least that's what I thought. I was still a little unsure despite their attempts at translating but I guess the specifics weren't that important. Especially since I managed to convince her to forgive me in exchange for sending her out to fight a couple of battles.

After a quick little break and pondering, I decided to name my new friend, Klick, after a slang for measuring distances. Because like how Sun and I were going to be the brightest star in the world, Klick and I were going to go far!

Priorities™! Though at least it was handy for smoothing over that rocky start there.

Klick certainly lived up to her namesake. She was fast, agile, tough, and a real adrenaline junkie. Even after five battles, she was still raring to go. Currently, I was leading her against a Shinx. It was going surprisingly well, I didn't know what I expected when I threw her against an Electric-type but she was a lot more competent than I initially believed. Even without my commands, she was able to dodge and weave through its electric attacks, striking back at just the perfect moment to minimise the damage taken.

Okay, yeah, given that this is a Nuzlocke-themed story, I can already tell that Klick won’t be long for this world. :copyka:

I do wonder if the flow of battle here feels a bit too “summarized” at the moment and if we’d have been better off seeing more of the actual flow of the battle play out.

Up in the sky, her body glowed an elegant white, and she dived down, disappearing into a white blur.

Woah! My eyes lost track of her as she struck the Shinx, knocking it out cold. She landed beside me, holding her head high.

That was an awesome Quick Attack! All we need to do is to practice with it some more and nothing will ever hit you again.”

Ditto here. Though don’t make me bust out that one Bender gif I use every now and then, Cygnus, since there’s only so far that Quick Attack goes in the metagame.

Klick puffed her chest out, letting out a prideful laugh.

“So, do you forgive me now?” I popped the question.

She made a ‘so-so’ motion with her wing but I took what I could get.

Cygnus: “... Good enough for me!” ^^;

“Alright, now I'm gonna switch you out for Sun. I want him to get a little stronger before we head to the city.”

Hopefully, he could learn Ember before we leave for the city.

I think that this section probably would’ve made sense to give a bit more acknowledgement of what, if any, progress Sun has been making here.

I retrieved Klick without any problems and sent Sun out, receiving a determined nod from him as we marched onward.

The day went by pretty fast as we fought our way through. Unfortunately, even though we fought a decent bunch of wild Pokémon, Sun hadn't quite figured out Ember but he somehow managed Taunt. I bit back the frustration, usually a Chimchar would learn Ember before anything else. I heaved a sigh as I made the tough call to start leaving for the city.

The Sun was slowly disappearing behind the horizon, painting the sky in a wide array of oranges and yellow. The city was slowly creeping into my vision and although it was still relatively bright out, the city was slowly lighting up. People and Pokémon of various sizes and shapes mingled under the evening sun with not a care in the world.

I’m not sure if I’m really feeling this abrupt skipahead in time here, since “The day went by pretty fast” part admittedly doesn’t really sell a good sense of time passing. Dunno if it’d work better with an extension, or else with a hard scene cut.

The smell hit my sinuses and I grimaced. Yup, that's Jubilife City for ya. Smoky and crisp with a tinge of charred tarmac.

[ ] I reached into my bag to pull out a notebook, flipping it open to reveal a checklist. Top priority, of course, was to go find the Pokémon center and register for the gym circuit. After that, I had to write down and double check the things I had to buy before heading for Oreburgh. Mostly potions, more pokéballs, and other miscellaneous utensils.

I think that it probably makes sense to have Cygnus react a bit more to the “ew”-ness of the smell before he continues on. Though I take it that he’s not used to air that isn’t constantly super fresh and unpolluted, huh?

Probably need a plan for Roark too. A Starly and a Chimchar weren't the best picks for a Rock-type gym but I was sure I'd figure something out later. I flipped through the pages, landing on a small list of suitable encounters near Jubilife. A Budew would work swimmingly if I can find one, or maybe I could go the easy route and train up a Bidoof into Bibarel…

I think that you should focus more on getting good at training your existing Pokémon given that Klick still hasn’t fully forgiven you over the circumstances of her capture.

I jotted down the beginnings of a plan as I walked down the streets. The scratching of my pencil grounded me from being dragged around by the city’s noise, and it was always a nice feeling writing down my thoughts.

“Ohohoho! Do my eyes deceive me?”

Terra has entered the chat right now, huh?

My hands froze and as my mind fully processed the familiar voice, I tried to reign in my reactions, acting like I didn't hear it. My legs carried me onward, my steps hurrying, maybe if I acted natural she wouldn't–

“Ack!”

An arm wrung around my neck, bringing my head close to an annoyingly familiar warmth. “Cygnie, it is you! I was wondering where you've been. Thought ya forgot what day it was when I didn't see you at the professor earlier!”

Yeah, I figured. Though I see that Terra’s cut from the “friendly rival” mold kinda like Barry.

I shuffled out of her grasp, glaring with as much irritation as I could possibly muster at the grinning redhead. “Terra.”

“Cygnus,” she said, not at all phased as she copied my annoyed tone with that cheeky smirk.

Terra was a girl, an annoying redhead with long straight hair that hung down to the middle of her back. Her face held her signature smirk, infuriatingly smug and joyous. Her outfit today was… cute, a pretty blue dress that complimented her dainty and delicate figure. It could do without the comically large sunhat though, it made her look like she was more ready for a picnic than a journey.

Huh, interesting dichotomy for her portrayal there. Since her attire’s certainly very “dainty”, but her personality certainly isn’t.

A sigh escaped my lips. “What do you want?”

A battle? ^^;

“Whaaat? Why do I need something from you to check up on my favouritest rival?” Terra tried to wrap her arm around my neck again but I dodged, leaning away as she continued speaking, undeterred by the attempt. “Y’know, I really did think you weren't gonna make it. Like, you even missed out on our meet-up! And that wasn't mentioning how you flaked on our first rival battle too! You know it's tradition to have your first fight be your rival!”

Yeah, I figured.

Was it tradition to have a clingy girl always following him around? But… I guess I did promise something like that. I clenched my fist, pointing a finger at her.

Alright, fine! Let's go then!”

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Though this was how Cygnus bit it last time, wasn’t it? :copyka:

She gasped, her smile somehow became even brighter as she suddenly clasped my hand, her eyelashes fluttering. “Great! Come on, I'll even buy you dinner after I win!”

My traitorous heart skipped a beat at the contact and warmth crept onto my cheeks. “Af-after I win!” I shouted, shoving down that weird warm feeling down the recesses of my mind and trying to regain some face.

“That's the spirit!” She laughed, dragging me by the arm.

Whelp, time to see just how much of a disaster this will be, since Cygnus didn’t exactly give me strong vibes of being really ready for serious battles right now. [copyka2]

[ ]

“He-hey, I can walk myself!” I tried to pull away but she was a lot stronger than she looked.

“I know.” Her voice was smug and I sputtered out a protest.

In the end, I resigned myself to the ball of energy that was my friend rival. The two of us walked down the streets, hands clasped together as Terra gestured and pointed to the various stores and places around them, talking about how we should check them out after we were done with the battle.

See, she is doing the ‘friendly rival’ shtick. Even if I saw a moment where it probably would’ve made sense to expand on Cygnus’ thought process a bit more than you presently do.

Eventually, we made our way to a stadium of sorts. There were trainers everywhere, some were battling, training, even a few talking about trading but the majority were just chatting and talking about nothing in particular. Though I could somewhat make out important bits and pieces here and there. Battle plans, advice, complimenting each other’s team, most of it generally about how excited they were to finally begin their journey.

Wait, is this the television studio, or…?

I couldn't focus on much on the important parts though when Terra let go of my hand, jumping and waving.

“Yoohoo, Rachel! Over here!”

A blonde girl, she looked a bit older than us, probably a year or so. Though it could also be because of her height, she was a noticeable head taller than me… not that I was jealous of something as stupid as that. My eyes glanced over to Terra, noting that she was still a few inches taller.

Definitely not.

Oh, hello, that’s a new face there. Though Cygnus is totally jealous right now, don’t even try to deny it, buddy. >:V

Rachel looked over to us in surprise before she schooled her expression into a composed smile. She walked on over, her stride as confident and cool as the outfit she wore. A leather jacket draped over a black shirt that showed off her midriff and a pair of short jeans.

Yo, Terra! You back for more?”

“Nope. Not this time. Let me introduce you to my bestest and coolest rival! Cygnus Plein!”

Rachel: “... I think you can do better, honestly.” ^^;

I flinched when Rachel turned her gaze towards me. Suddenly I was back in school again, remembering how Terra dragged me in front of class to introduce myself, the judging gazes, the cruel gleam in their smiles– Snap out of it! This is different. She's a person that knows nothing about you! Come on, think of a cool introduction!

“Uh… hi.”

[ ]

Great choice of words. Wow, I've no idea how I came up with that.

Another spot where IMO, it probably makes sense to have a bit more of Cygnus’ indirect thoughts before he pipes up with his direct ones.

“Hi to you too, little dude,” she said, winking at me in quiet understanding as if to say she knew what it was like to be dragged by the whirlwind that was Terra. [ ]

“Alright!” Terra clapped. “Now that we're all acquainted, you mind playing ref for us, Rachel? It's our first rival battle and well, you know how it is.”

Something about your transition back to Terra feels very abrupt here. It might have been worth showing off some of Cygnus’ reaction before he notices Terra drawing his attention or something.

Rachel mulled over the question for a bit, shrugging as she said, “Sure, got nothing better to do.”

[ ]
“Awesome!” Terra turned to me, pulling out a pokéball. “Let's go, standard 1v1 ruleset, capiche?”

No reaction from Cygnus about how he feels about Rachel agreeing to this or else him trying to mentally prepare himself for battle?

I nodded as she dragged me to one of the fields. With a quiet staredown, a spark fizzled between our gaze as an unheard agreement was shared between us.

We took our positions as Rachel stood by the field, arm raised.

“Three.”

My fingers hovered over my starter's ball.

“Two.”

Terra grinned, bouncing with untethered energy.

“And begin!”

Whelp, time to see whether we get our first nasty surprise in the story here given all the content warnings for this story. Since I can’t tell if this is going to stay a cute moment or take a hard swerve into
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in about a minute.

Rachel swung her arm down, signalling the start of our battle.

I unclipped my pokéball and we tossed out our starters at the same time.

“Let's do this, Sun!”

“Time to drown ‘em, Bubbles!”

[ ] A Piplup. Of course, she'd pick a Piplup. Whatever. Type advantage wouldn't matter if I planned this smartly.

It will if she out-trained you, just saying. Though I feel that it probably would’ve made sense to describe more of seeing the actual process of Bubbles coming out onto the field there.

“Leer!”

“Nuh uh, Growl!” She chuckled. “No debuffs for you!”

Smart rival there.

I grimaced, one step ahead as usual. Fine, we were at a standstill and she had a bigger advantage over me anyway. “Taunt and then another Leer!”

Sun cocked a grin, mouthing off what I imagined must be the mother of all insults with how red the Piplup’s face was becoming. Bubbles looked absolutely livid and it was a little weird seeing such an unusually aggressive expression on its cutesy face.

So, more or less weird than the various faces that Iris’ Dragonite makes in the anime? ^^;

“Ooh!” Terra’s smile widened as if she’d received a welcoming surprise. “Bubbles, try and hold that righteous wrath in, okay? We'll be doing your specialty real soon, Pound!”

“Scratch!”

Sun and Bubbles engaged each other. Bubbles striking with glowing flippers as Sun parried and countered with glowing claws. Despite Bubbles’ weakened defense, they were roughly equal. Neither one seemed to hold too much of an advantage over the other.

Also not really feeling this battle description at the moment. I think the primary issue that I see with it is that it doesn’t really sell a firm sense of motion and relative location between these two.

[ ]

“Alright, why don't we kick it up a notch? Bubbles, Bubble him!”

She named her Piplup “Bubbles” just to be able to do this at some point, didn’t she? :V

Though I feel that we need a bit more transition into Terra speaking up, whether in a short fresh paragraph or attached to the prior one.

My breath hitched as I hissed out a curse. [ ]

Jump back to avoid it and then get back in when it stops!”

Another spot where it probably makes sense to show a bit more of Cygnus’ thoughts here.

“Dual wield! Go go, Bubbles! Don't let him get another hit!”

Dual wield? The hell does that even mean?

Sun leapt away, managing to evade the oncoming bubbles. He rushed in, claws glowing but before he could even land a hit, Bubbles struck back with a Pound, knocking him away and continuing its bubbling assault.

Sun: “*I call hax.*”
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Although Sun was quicker on his feet, being able to dodge a majority of Bubbles’ attacks. Bubbles simply did too much damage for him to handle. Each landed hit from Sun resulted in him getting scraped, grazed by either a glowing flipper or an exploding bubble.

I didn't have many options and Leer was too risky with all those bubbles. Sun was getting exhausted, visibly heaving and body shaking. It didn't take long before he made a misstep, and Bubbles didn't even hesitate to punish him, knocking out my starter in an instant.

As Sun fell to the ground, I returned my starter with a grumble. Another loss. I didn't know why I expected things to be different when we got our starters but it seemed like Terra was still several steps ahead of me.

Is Sun ever going to get back up again given that this is a Nuzlocke fic? Though does this mean that Cygnus managed to get Lucas' Chimchar killed in literal hours after being gifted him? :copyka:

It stung as badly as the rest. I hated this feeling. The bitter taste of defeat lingered on my tongue. But I didn't let myself succumb to it, I couldn't let it get to me. I just had to try harder next time.

Wait, so is Cygnus going to straight up die again in the first chapter, or-?

“Cygnus’ Chimchar has been defeated. Victory goes to Terra!” Rachel announced, bringing me back to reality.

“And another flawless victory for Terra the Terrific!” Terra shouted, cupping her hands around her mouth. “And the crowd goes wild! Haa! Haa! Woo! That was fun! You’re a lot stronger than I expected.”

Oh, well. Guess Cygnus staves off the Reaper for another day.

She was posing, her Piplup also joined in as well. They moved in sync like they practiced this routine dozens of times before. Knowing her, she probably did.

I mean… yeah, I believe it, honestly.

Terra walked up to me. It wasn't for money, she vehemently despised taking money for a win. But the mischievous grin on her face told me she was scheming something as she held up a hand. “Give me five!”

Oh, that’s certainly new. Though it definitely helps for establishing the sort of character that Terra is there.

I stared at her.

This was undoubtedly a trap.

She stared back, unflinching.

My composure crumbled as soon as her amber eyes met mine and I raised a reluctant hand. [ ]

“Got you!”

It was a trap! I couldn't retract my hand in time before she wrapped her hand around it. I stumbled back but she held me steady.

I think that you should describe a bit more of what’s going on in this part for the sort of “trap” that Terra is subjecting Cygnus to, since it’s a bit unclear to me at the moment.

“Ahem, now what do we say after battling?” She lowered my arm, intertwining her fingers around mine. Her eyes locked onto mine, gleaming under the twilight sky with a mischievous yet kind twinkle. Her pearl white teeth baring in a grin that bore a teasing joy.

She's so close.

So, what’s the over/under of Cygnus blushing beet red right now.

Warmth rushed to my cheeks as I pushed that thought away, focusing on anything but the softness around my hand. “Good game?”

Really high, apparently. :mewlulz:

My rival beamed, looking satisfied with my answer as she raised her free hand. “Bye Rachel! I'll see you tomorrow!” She turned back to me, dragging me by the arm. “Come on, I know a place that has the absolute bestest curry!”

The protest died in my throat before I could even manage the words. Resigning myself to the hurricane in human form, I cast one last pleading glance towards Rachel, mouthing silent words of help.

But the cruel blonde only watched with a delighted smile as if this whole thing was a play and I was starring as the unfortunate protagonist.

I mean… you kinda are even if you don’t realize it just yet, Cygnus. Even if that makes me wonder if Sun will wind up coming back in the next chapter unlike a normal Nuzlocke or not, since that sure felt really friendly and chipper for a moment where in a Nuzlocke, Sun would just be dead right now.

Alright, made it to the end. I thought that you had a pretty neat concept for a story here for a Nuzlocke in which the human is affected as well, and failure is not the end of things but the beginning of something new. The opening I thought was particularly strong since it did a good job of selling the sense of “life through the eyes of a dying kid”, along with the subsequent panic the next day of Cygnus pulling an Ash and making a mad rush to try and get his starter. I thought the characters in the story established themselves pretty well, both the OCs and also Cyrus, who pulls off a deeply unsettling vibe in the narrow window where we run into him.

That said, I did notice a couple things that stood out to me as issues. First and foremost was that there were parts of this story that felt a bit underdescribed, and as such, made some moments feel like they transitioned abruptly and others a bit hard to gauge what was going on. I admittedly feel that the depicted battles in the chapter were one of the more affected portions, since they admittedly felt more summarized than “actively unfolding” at times, which I think sucked a bit of the excitement out from watching them unfold. I do wonder if you had a bit of a missed opportunity not establishing “yeah, this is a Nuzlocke” at the very end of your opening chapter by something like Cygnus going to the local Pokécenter and getting a nasty shock or else even hinting that something was very wrong, since the ending admittedly felt like it would’ve been right at home in a conventional and more lighthearted story, which felt a little at odds with the opening and the description in the summary.

I’ll leave it to you to decide which of my recommendations you’ll action on, if any. But I feel that on balance, that this was a respectable opening chapter @ShiniGojira , and I’ll be looking forward to seeing where you go with this concept.
 
Chapter 2: The Start of Everything

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Blood, Gore, Deaths (Human and Pokémon).

Beta-read by Tango

Sunlight rained down on the land of Sinnoh, drowning it in its warmth and brilliance, indiscriminate and imposing. Unfortunately, that meant it also found its way through the window and past the tiny speck of distance between the curtains to blast my face with the concentrated warmth of a billion campfires. I covered myself with a groggy groan but the sun had already done its job and it would take a damn near miracle for me to get back to sleep.

I reluctantly got up and stretched my joints, groaning with the sounds of popping and loosening knots in my back.

Like always it was a struggle for me to get up, my mind foggy from the last remnants of sleep. It was only when I made my way to the bathroom did the memories of last night come back to me.



Terra…

My eyes hardened into a glare as I made my way over to the bathroom, splashing myself awake.

I tried not to think about her, not her little laugh, not her pretty amber eyes, not her–

Ah! Stop it! Weird thoughts, get out of my head. In my desperation, I banged my head against the sink, glaring into the mirror.

Terra was my rival, that was plain and clear. We were supposed to be angry and mean to each other, and every time we talked, it should be with jabs and insults meant to drive ourselves further!

The mirror reflected my green eyes, lighting up with a fierce flame. Clearly, my reflection agreed with what I was talking about from how it nodded at my thoughts.

That's right! We weren't supposed to be friendly with each other and hold-holding hands–

*Ahem*

So the day started like any other day, and ignoring the crawling warmth on my cheeks, I cooled myself off in the shower.

After getting dressed, I left my room and went to get breakfast for me and my team. I was so incredibly lucky that there were still rooms vacant in the pokécenter. Usually, at the start of a League season, there wouldn't be enough rooms to accommodate the sudden wave of new trainers, especially in a city as big as Jubilife.

While I didn't plan on staying in the city for long, it was still so much better to live in someplace free instead of renting out a motel or something. My monthly stipend could only handle so many expenses.

Potential financial issues aside, the free food from the center’s cafe was also surprisingly good. The waffles and pancakes were amazing, they even had nutritional pokéchow for my team, each specifically made to bring out their fullest potential and improve their health… or something. I sorta tuned out the canteen lady because of how hungry I was. Though, I should head back and ask her where I could purchase some chow for my team. Nutrition’s like a super important thing Pokémon needed to become truly strong after all.

After I was done with breakfast and noting down the advice the canteen lady happily provided. I made my way over to the stadium. Last night, I went over my notes on the few training tips I could gather in the center’s miniature library and jotted down what potential things I should train.

Ember for Sun was an obvious choice. The battle with Terra showed me that I needed a range option. Melee was good and all but it wasn't good enough if the opponent could just knock Sun out before he got close, and while I could circumvent that issue by training Sun to be faster in closing the distance... There were going to be times where Sun just couldn't reach his opponent. Case in point, Psychic and Flying-types.

And speaking of Flying-types, I decided that Wing Attack was perfect for Klick. It was a simple and easy choice, and I already wrote down several ideas for how to incorporate it into her fighting style. Starly also learned the move naturally so it’d be pretty easy for her to get it going. Once she mastered it, it would lead nicely into Aerial Ace.

My eyes wandered around the stadium as I arrived, there were a couple of trainers around already. Though aside from a couple of brief glances, none of them gave me any trouble as they continued on with their training. I shook my head to gather myself when I saw a few of them currently battling. No time for distractions, it was time for training.

I didn't enter the place. There was no need for that when there were numerous training fields on the outside. Finding myself a nice secluded place with a big open field near the outskirts of the stadium where there were only one or two trainers around, I put my backpack down and sent out my team, receiving determined and happy cries in return.

With a smile plastered on my face, I crouched down and relayed my plans. “Alright, Sun. Here's the deal. We're gonna be teaching you how to use Ember.”

“Char.” He nodded with a serious look.

“Now, I know you had a little trouble with getting that flame on.” Sun looked a little somber at the reminder. “Which is why I've come up with a plan! First, we're gonna try increasing your body temperature through rigorous exercise!"

Slamming a fist into an open palm, I continued, "Having a higher heat point should make it easier for you to let that fire out. So, go run some laps and get some sweat on ya. Once you're done, we can try and see if that'll help.”

“Chimchar.” Sun nodded and proceeded to run laps.

And with the plan for my starter in action, I swapped over to Klick.

“As for you.” I pointed at my Starly who mockingly saluted me. “Wing Attack will be a nice basic move to teach you. It'll help you segue into Aerial Ace when you become faster. Though I'm not too sure how we'll be teaching you that but I'm sure it'll come easy to you."

She'd been on her own for a lot longer than I knew her so I was confident she'd figure things out.

"We'll start with simple flight manoeuvres, try and see if you can weave around the trees without slowing down, that might help you get a feel of that Flying-type energy.”

Klick let out a smug chirp as if to say something like that was far beneath her before she took off.

I looked back at my Chimchar, keeping track of how many laps he ran. After the tenth lap, I called him back. He was breathing heavily, sweat clinging to his forehead and posture a little low.

“Alright. How do you feel? Do you feel the burn? The fire?”

“Chim… char…” His flame burned brighter in response.

I grinned. “Well, give it a shot. Look within yourself and set that grass on fire!”

He inhaled deeply, his tail flame flaring hotter and bigger as he… spat out a small spark. The little thing barely crackled before it fell, leaving the grass completely unaffected.

The grin on my face wobbled at the sight and I took a deep breath. “Alright, again!”

Another spark, this time it fizzled away before it even touched the grass.

Come on, this isn't anywhere near as strong as Terra’s…

“Again!” I shouted, frowning.

Another dud. Did it get smaller this time? How was that even possible?

“Again!”

Another fail. Another. Then again and again and…

My frustration was mounting with each attempt. My fists clenched as I snarled in irritation. How was I supposed to beat her if Sun couldn't even learn something this basic?

A growl tore out of my throat. “Come on, buddy. How hard is it to use Ember? You're a Fire-type! This should be easy for you!”

“Chim char chim!” He talked back, sending a tired but angry glare my way.

I scoffed. “I bet Klick could do her own move first try!” Cupping my mouth and shouting, “Hey Klick!”

Almost as soon as I finished speaking, Klick came flying in, a confused look on her face.

“Why don't you try using Wing Attack on that tree over there? Someone doesn’t believe that you can do it first try.”

Klick gasped dramatically, bringing a wing to her chest and harrumphing. “Starly. Star!”

My frown stretched into a grin. She looked so certain of herself. “Yeah, that's right! Let's go, Wing Attack that tree!”

She flew over, head held high and hovering just a few inches away. With a powerful battlecry, she raised her wing, her body glowing. “Staaaar–”

She struck.

“–Ly!”

And cried out in pain as her unprotected wing struck the tree with a painful sound.

Oh no…

“Oh no no no.” I ran over to her, my legs practically skipping over as I looked all over her. “Please don't tell me I… craap, I didn't think this would happen…”

I glanced around, eyes darting left and right. Where was my bag? Where was it? I needed a potion, a berry, something to help her.

In the corner of my eyes, I saw it. Sun was lifting my bag but before I could react, he launched it at me, smacking me in the face.

“Oof!”

I fell over with a groan. My hands pushing it off of me. It didn't really hurt but I just laid there, drowning under my team’s laughter. It was a prank and I fell for it.

I sat upright, glaring at the two. “Haha, real funny, guys.”

The two of them must've found my expression hilarious as they only laughed harder. I tried to stay mad at them, I really did but it was hard to stifle the shaking of my shoulders. “You two really did a number on me, huh?” I chuckled and that was the droplet that burst the dam as I let myself go, joining in all the laughing.

It felt oddly satisfying, uplifting in a way that I wasn't used to. The tension in my shoulders loosened up as I let out a tired sigh.

I really was acting like a stuck-up, huh?

The loss against Terra must've been hitting me a lot harder than I thought. Ugh, it was just so irritating. Here I was struggling and trying so hard to beat her but like always, she took me on without worry like I was just a small stepping stone in her journey.

I felt two bodies nuzzling up against me, their soft warmth breaking me away from my self-deprecating thoughts. It was a comfortable feeling, soothing and warm. A small smile wormed up my face as I turned to face them. “Thanks, guys.”

The two chirped at me as I patted their heads. “I'm sorry about yelling at you, Sun. I guess I was just frustrated and I let that loss get to my head. It's just… a little tiring, y’know? Terra’s perfect, she’s smart, strong, has friends... She never second guesses herself and she always knows what to do. And I'm just… me, boring ‘ol weak Cygnus.”

“Chimchar chim.” Sun looked up at me, his eyes shining with determination.

“Star Starly!” Klick chirped loudly, her wing pointing at my chest and back to her own.

Even without words, I knew what they were saying. We were in this together. I stood up with a vigorous bounce, a bright grin on my face. “Alright then! Why don't we try something else for a change? You two up to fight some trainers?”

They nodded, letting out excited cries.

“Then let's do this!”



The morning made way for noon as I walked down the streets, hands occupied with jotting down ideas and plans for my future. I made a decent bit of cash from my short bout of battling though no luck in learning the moves I wanted. I figured I should head to the local library or Trainer School to brush up on my foundations. I must be missing something if neither Sun nor Klick could figure out their own typings.

My stomach rumbled, derailing my thoughts and reminding me why I was out here in the first place. I closed my notebook, shoving it into my bag as I looked around. People were starting to trickle in, it wouldn't be a surprise if the streets became flooded soon.

And while Sinnoh wasn't a particularly hot region, the afternoon sun was scorching. Must be a world record with how hot it was. I hastened my pace. I did not want to spend half an hour standing in the blazing heat. No, thank you.

Luckily, I managed to find a nice roomy restaurant that sold both Pokémon food and regular food. The restaurant was quiet and cosy, calm blue decor, clean and organised in a way that pleased the mind, it was a nice lull before lunch hour would undoubtedly drive it into insanity.

I placed my order, taking one of the booth seats by the corner. It was surprisingly comfy, a lot more than what I expected from a place that looked like it got a maximum of thirty customers a day. Taking out my notebook, I laid it out, exposing my plans and shopping list to the world. There was the usual stuff: pokéballs, potions, y’know things the average trainer needed. Of course, there were other necessities but aside from food, my mom pretty much bought anything I needed. She was really adamant about me having a good sleeping bag to match with the tent I got from Terra as a gift.

Hm… maybe I should get more notebooks, this one is pretty filled already…

My eyes wandered around the place as I pondered about things to buy, absentmindedly tapping the pencil against the table. I mean, I don't really need more pens, I already have a whole bundle of them… but you can never go wrong with more.

People were starting to fill the place; a tired man walked in, looking dead to the world, a couple was holding hands and chatting, and a pink-haired kid was dragging her grandma to the counter.

I should also get some treats for my team. They deserve it for putting up with someone like me.

“Hey,” a familiar voice said, snapping me out of my notes. “Mind if I sit here?”

I looked up with surprise. A familiar blonde was leaning against the seat. Rachel was wearing a different outfit from yesterday, her black shirt swapped out for a red shirt with fire patterns stretching to her sleeves. She was wearing an orange skirt this time that reached down to her shins, still keeping that leather jacket draped over her shoulders. There was a cocky smirk on her face, her eyes gleaming with a confidence that I could never achieve.

Rachel? Is… is she talking to me? No, that's ridiculous. We barely said anything to each other. Why would she–

She snapped her fingers. “You alive there, Cygnie?”

I gasped in shocked embarrassment, dropping my pencil as warmth flooded my cheeks. “It-it’s Cygnus, n-not…” I shook my head. “Terra’s the one that came up with that weird nickname. Yo-you can just call me Cygnus.”

My lips twitched into a shaky smile, hiding the fact that I was internally cursing my rival . Damn it, Terra. She must've put Rachel up to this.

She nodded, shrugging. “It's fine if I sit, right? The place’s packed and I don't know about you but I don't exactly like being stranded under the sun surrounded by a bunch of hungry and sweaty folks. Like honestly, it's like the sun’s trying for a new record or something. Must be like forty degrees out there.”

“Ye-yeah, you’d think Moltres’s doing a fly-by or something,” I joked, chuckling nervously as I gestured for her to sit.

Gah, stop stuttering! You're acting like a fool in front of such a mature and composed gal!

Like, just look at that posture! The way she held her head high, the way her blue eyes travelled in quick and meaningful strokes, and how her short hair managed to capture that feral look without being too wild. She was practically radiating confidence and coolness. I wouldn't be surprised if she had a couple badges already, she looked old enough to have gotten at least two or three!

“Hah! Yeah, could you imagine if it was some weirdo summoning Groudon to turn up the heater or some crap?” Rachel giggled, leaning back and practically sinking into her seat. Letting out a sigh of relief, she leaned down, massaging her right leg. “Man, my leg's been such a pain. I got a cramp a few days ago and it's still killing me even now. Can't even do more than half an hour of strenuous activity before it acts up.”

My eyes wandered back to her grinning face, chewing on my lip. “Oh, huh, really? I uh, never would've guessed…” I trailed off, unsure of what to say but I didn't want to end it on an awkward note. “I don't exactly do a… uh, lot of exercise so I guess I wouldn't understand what that's like.”

She snorted as if hearing a funny joke.

Realisation shot me in the neck as an embarrassed warmth crept to my cheeks. I just implied I was a shut-in loser, didn't I? Damn it! I wanted to bash my head into the table so much right now but that would accomplish the exact opposite of what I wanted.

An amused smile crossed her face. “Well, here's some advice from an expert. If you ever feel like you're about to reach your limit, take a good fifteen minute break before resuming your exercise. Taking breaks in between rigorous training is essential for a healthy mind and body.”

I blinked. That was genuinely helpful. I'd expected a laugh, a joke at my expense, not this. My mouth opened but no words came out and I shut it so fast that I doubted she noticed. I didn't know what to say or how to navigate this or anything. Terra and Lucas were like the only people who had ever helped me with stuff.

Should I say thanks? Or a witty remark? I should at least say something instead of staring at her like a weirdo. But the thought of doing even that was making my heart beat, anxious of what she would say at such a sublime response.

Thankfully, before I could spiral even further into a nervous wreck, my order came just in the nick of time, saving my bum from burning in awkward silence.

My order was simple, a plate of steaming fried rice with sweet and sour chicken as the side dish. The scent was absolutely amazing and the herbal tea complimented it so well. While I wouldn't verbally admit it, lest she teased me about it, Terra’s recommendations hadn't led me astray so far.

I took another bite, the food practically melting in my mouth. Ah, this was the life.

“Woah, are these all yours?”

My veins turned cold and my eyes darted to her. Rachel was looking through my notes, her eyes widened in surprise. Crap, I forgot all about them.

My mouth flapped opened uselessly, my mind firing off in an attempt to salvage the situation, to say or do something that wouldn't let her know I was a loser that just knew a lot of random Pokémon trivia–

“Approximate stages of when a Pokémon will learn a specific move, detailed lists of what they can do and what they can learn, comprehensive facts and–” Rachel coughed and shook her head, a small blush on her face as she gathered up all the notes and passed them to me with a sheepish chuckle. “Sorry, I got ahead of myself there. Got a bit curious and couldn't hold myself back. Really sorry about that, I know how protective people can get about their notes and uh–”

“It's… fine. I don't really mind.” I said, taking my notes back with a nervous smile.

Rachel let out a sigh of relief. “Okay, good.” She patted her chest before throwing me a couple finger guns. “But seriously though, those are some incredibly detailed notes though. I don't think I've ever seen half of what you've written or at least not so neatly. You must've put in a lot of effort in researching this stuff, huh?”

I pushed the blush down, trying to keep cool from how genuine her compliments sounded. “It's… it's not that big a deal, really.” The chuckle that came out was uncertain and awkward. “I just volunteer for Professor Rowan a bunch of times and things just sorta stuck, y’know. Anyone could do what I did if they wanted to. I'm not… special…”

Not like Terra.

The thought gripped my brain but I didn't let it fester, instead taking in a deep breath and letting the emotions recede. I did it fast and never once showed a hint of what I felt on my face, settling my expression into a neutral look with practiced ease.

Rachel’s smile froze for a second, tugging downward before she shook her head, the grin still plastered on her features. “Ah, that's right. Terra did say something like that.” She thumbed her chin in thought.

“Honestly, you're not quite what I expected. I would've thought being the professor’s assistants would make you guys act a little… stuck-up, y’know. Being tied to a big shot like Professor Rowan and all that. Makes a girl a tad happy to know that isn't the case with all of you.”

I chewed on her words along with my meal. She's met other assistants before? Well, I guessed it made sense. Lucas and I weren't the first, and I never did bother to ask Lucas about any of the previous helpers.

“So how did the two of you meet?” I blinked at that and she clarified further. “Terra, I mean, you two seemed pretty close. And based on her words, you two made quite the team together.”

The food went down my throat in a sharp inhale and I slammed my hands on the table. “Whatever she’s been saying about me is false, you got that! I did not blow up that classroom nor set that schoolyard on fire!”

She blinked, caught off guard by the sudden outburst. Recovering with a smirk, a glimmer sparkled in her eyes. “Oh hoh, What's this about blowing stuff up? Do tell, Mr Cygnus.”

I froze up, realising I said too much and recoiled back into my seat, a mortified blush on my face. “Nothing happened!” I squeaked out at her amused giggles.

Taking a moment to breathe, I coughed into my hand, crossing my arms and looking away with a huff. “Terra and I aren't close, by the way. Like I'd ever become friends with that loudmouth. She just constantly drags me around, forces me to do stuff that would cut into my studying time and has like no respect for personal space. We're rivals, got that? Not besties, not super duper terrific best buds or whatever adjectives she likes to use to describe our relationship. We're not friends, and certainly not close.”

Rachel blinked with an incredulous look and then she had the gall to laugh, acting like my conviction was the funniest joke she'd ever heard.

I grumbled, my lips tugging into a frown as I stabbed another piece of my meal. The one time I talk to someone and this is what I get.

The waiter finally arrived with both hers and my team’s orders. I let them out and after they gave a brief glance to Rachel, they immediately began to gorge themselves like there was no tomorrow.

I chuckled at the sight. “No one’s gonna take your food, y’know. You guys can slow down and enjoy it.”

“Starm lymm!” Klick poked her head out of her bowl, food in her mouth. She pointed a wing at my nearly empty plate and gave me a look.

My cheeks stretched into a sheepish grin. “Well, I… I just eat fast, okay? It's different.”

Klick scoffed and went back to her meal with the same vigour as Sun looked up to shake his head at me. That little punk.

“Don’t look at me like that! I don't see you slowing down either.” I scowled, turning my head to see my Chimchar slowly and deliberately eat his food like he was covered in molasses.

A sigh escaped my lips but the smile on my face belied my supposed ire.

“So you two really did get your starters from the professor, huh?” I froze at the question, turning my head back to her. She had her head propped on a hand, her bright blue eyes now dimmed with an emotion that was difficult to describe. She was picking at her food with a fork, her body slumped in on itself like she was reminiscing on something but the look on her face suggested it wasn't a pleasant memory.

Was it something I said?

An uncomfortable, tense silence swept over us with only the occasional background chatter sliding in to prevent it from becoming too unbearable. I picked away at the scraps on my plate, struggling to think of something to say. Why was talking so hard?

Desperate to break the ice, I spoke up. “Well, yeah… uh how about your team, Rachel? What's your starter like?” I internally screamed at myself at how stupid those words were. She was already showing distress at my starter, why the heck did I think asking about hers would be better?

Quick, I had to think of something!

I coughed, rubbing the nape of my neck. “Ahem, I… uh, I'm sure… someone like you must have an awesome team. You're what? A year or two older than me? I bet you even have tons of badges to show off.”

To her credit, she took the topic change with plenty of grace. Her confident stance returning as she answered though a bit more stiff like she wasn't quite used to speaking about this, “More or less. I started off with my Ralts and–”

“You have a Ralts?” She hesitated but there was a nod. Awesome! I was gonna see a real life Psychic-type! Unable to shake off the grin on my face, I continued, “Can you show me? I've never seen one in person before!”

Whether compelled by my genuine glee or perturbed by it, she made a move for her pokéball before pausing. “Actually, if you wanna get a peek of her, why don't you do me a little favour first?”

“I'll do anything!” I wasn't letting this opportunity slip by me. Being able to analyse and see a Psychic-type at work would be incredible! And if I was able to convince Rachel to show me some moves… it could be a huge benefit to me as well!

She snorted, smirking.

“Anything, you say?”

A chill went down my spine. That smile. It reminded me way too much of Terra when she spotted prime blackmail material.

I looked around frantically, looking for an escape but every single outlet was blocked by people!

Curse you, lunch hour!



I didn't know how I got out of there alive. That was so much worse than anything I'd ever experienced… by Arceus…



Okay, okay, enough being dramatic.

The ‘favour’ was honestly pretty simple, and I think it actually benefited me more than it did Rachel. We exchanged tips and ideas for both training and our teams. She was incredibly insightful. I didn't even know there could be that many different layers in a Pokémon’s nutritional diet. Like, did you know that apparently bird Pokémon like Klick needed a specific type of nutrient to keep their bodies clean and pristine? She even came up with a diet plan for me and my team on the spot.

She was seriously cool.

Though her training tips were a bit on the weird side, a lot of them focused on making the moves look flashy and… ambush-y I guess was the correct word for it. She must've been like a sneaky attacker or trickster during battle. While I wasn't planning on relying on tricks, I could appreciate the stylish and cool ways I could potentially use my team’s moves.

Of course, I shared some of my ideas and plans too, telling her all sorts of Pokémon-related things, like my battling plans, training, and how to make sure they were all bright and happy.

It was really nice being able to just talk to someone about all of this without being looked at like a weirdo–Terra didn't count.

Though, by the time we were finished, it was already getting late. I couldn't believe I let time slip by me that fast. Like, how was it even five right now? Sure, we spent a while checking out our Pokémon and sharing notes at the park but really? Four hours?

What was next? Was Terra gonna jump me from out of nowhere and waste my night again? I had better things to do than hanging out with her.

Like… uh… wait what was I trying to do again?



Oh right, shopping! It was already getting late so why not? I took out my checklist, looking through the various items I needed and nodded. Alright, time to go grocery shopping.

Potions, pokéballs, rope, repels and so much more. Getting the items was easy enough with my extensive list, but actually paying for them though? I looked at the massive line of people queuing to get their purchases and sighed.

Why did I think doing this on the second day of the League start was a good idea? I groaned internally, lamenting over my poor life decisions. Should've waited until tomorrow.

By the time I checked out and paid, it was already night. I walked down the streets, counting and making sure I didn't miss something. Drat, all that and I still need to get treats. It wasn't a necessity but there'd be something seriously wrong with me if I didn't give my team a gift for dealing with me.

So I then scoured the city for another hour. No, I didn't ask people for directions. How could you tell?

Sun and Klick looked pleasantly surprised when I brought them to a coffin store, even more so when I gave them a sample to see what they’d like. Klick loved the spicy ones so I got a batch of them along with a bunch of dry snacks since Sun practically inhaled his treat when he got them.

Overall, today was productive. I got some training done, made a new friend (I think?) and did some shopping. I should be good to go, though perhaps I should visit the library as well, cover my bases, that kind of stuff. ‘cause as useful as Rachel’s insight was, it could never go wrong with more knowledge.

The calm night reflected my relaxed thoughts. There weren't a lot of people around as it was getting quite late. There was a family walking their Houndour, talking and chatting with happy faces. There was an old lady being walked around by a teen boy who sounded exasperated by what was no doubt his grandmother’s teasing. And there was the moon high above, shining brightly and full. I could even spot a few stars despite the city’s lights.

Say what you will about Jubilife City but there was something special about walking down a nearly-empty street with the city’s ambience reduced to a quiet discordant harmony. It was relaxing.

A screech for help shattered the peace like a bullet.

I stood there for a second. What was– Shaking my head, I launched into a sprint towards the direction of the cry. No time to think, no time to waste. If someone needed help badly enough to scream in the middle of the night.

Then I have to help them.

After a few blocks of running, I found them, in a street that was nearly empty with only two people. Under the streetlight, there was a little girl with a pink ponytail, a red ribbon discarded on the ground beside her, along with someone familiar crouching next to her.

The little girl was crying, completely unresponsive as the person, Rachel, tried to console her with little success.

“Rachel? What happened?” I looked down at the girl, my heart wrenching at the sight.

Rachel jolted in surprise, looking up at me. “Cygnus?” She bit her lip and shook her head. “Terra and I found her like this… apparently someone stole her Pokémon.”

Stole her… My fists clenched and my body trembled, a sharp breath seething through my teeth. A Pokémon thief…

My eyes lingered on the girl crying before me, she was whimpering, crying out, “Daisy…”

It was happening again. Right in front of me, someone had their friend, their family taken away from them.

It was a long time ago but I still remembered the day it happened. When my mom came back home, she tried to hide it. But even when I was six, I noticed. Her eyes didn't shine as bright as they used to, her smile was fragile, forced, and her movements dragged like every waking day was a living nightmare. She was unconsolable at times and–

I shook my head. Rachel was informing me that the cops were coming, telling me that I should stay here, that the police could handle it and subsequently, she was trying to console the girl, but it was clear she was lost on what she was doing.

But – I gritted my teeth – by the time they arrived, it would be too late. I knew they'd be.

So with my decision made, I took a deep breath and kneeled down, keeping my voice soft and steady. “Hey, it's gonna be okay.”

She didn't respond but that was fine.

“It’s gonna be okay. Your Pokémon… Daisy, she's going to be fine. Don't you worry about your pretty little head. The police and big sister Rachel, they're all going to do their best to save her.”

Her shaking quelled, not quite gone but she at least didn't look like she'd be blown away by a simple whisper.

“You're a strong girl. Stronger than even most adults, I'd say. If I were in your shoes, I don't think I would even stop crying until I passed out. I know what losing a friend could do to people… and I don't think even Cynthia could handle having one of her friends gone… ” I chuckled lowly. This was a very familiar situation. Once again, I was pushed into the role of the comforter. I shook away the painful thoughts and brought out my greatest smile, putting a hand on her head and giving her a comforting pat. “What's your name?

The little girl sniffled. For a moment, it sounded like she wasn't going to answer but her voice came out, trembling and low. “Charlotte.”

“Charlotte, huh? That's a cute name for a pretty little lady.” I rubbed her head delicately, smoothing out the wild strands of her hair. Her trembling was slowly ceasing. “My name is Cygnus Plein. And yes, it's a pretty ridiculous sounding name. My mom was really fond of the stars, you see.”

Charlotte let out a timid giggle, her head slowly rising to fixate me with big teary eyes.

I leaned in, wiping her tears away with a gentle smile on my face. “Hey, you wanna know a little secret?” Her cute little mouth pursed up in a curious expression. “You're looking at the next and greatest champion of the whole world. The future champion of every region ever!”

With a graceful flourish, I performed a bow. “And as future champion of the world, I hereby promise that I'll get your Pokémon back for you, no matter what. Daisy won't be all alone and worried about her trainer for long if I'm on the case!”

She sniffled but tears no longer streamed down her cheeks. The girl smiled shyly as she murmured, “Daisy’s not a girl, he's a boy…”

But she didn't pull away as I stood up and shrugged.

“Well, being future champion still means I've a lot to learn. And–” I rummaged through my bag, taking a notebook. This one had a Clefable on the cover, smiling and waving in a cute manner. “–here, consider it a gift from the future champion of the world. In here are the secrets and techniques to all you'll ever need to become a great trainer.”

My smile widened when I saw her flipping through the pages. Her gaze lingered a few seconds longer on certain pages. Likely, seeing the silly little illustrations I'd drawn from years bygone. This notebook was something I'd spent years going over, the amount of effort and research I went through, it hurt a little to part away with something I'd poured my heart into but at the same time, seeing the genuine awe on her face made it all worth it.

I pulled away, turning around to see Rachel staring at me with disbelief.

“What?” I asked.

My words jerked her out of her trance. “N-nothing. I'm just… surprised,” she said. “I didn't take you for someone good with kids.”

A brief tinge of red flooded my cheeks. I completely forgot she was there. “That's not–” I shook away the denial forming on my tongue. I didn't have time to waste. “Rachel, can you stay here and tell me where that thief went?”

She didn't immediately respond, looking a little uncomfortable.

“Rachel?”

She blinked, breathing through her teeth. “I’m sorry but I… I can't stay here, Terra’s–I’m not good at handling these types of situations. I can't deal with kids.”

“You don't have to do anything, Rachel," I hissed. Why was she even hesitating on helping a little kid? "Just stay here, keep little Charlotte safe and wait for the police to show up. I can't waste any more time standing here. That thief could be anywhere in the city by now!”

Her calm eyes faltered. “But I–”

“Rachel! Just tell me where he ran off to!” I snapped, taking a step forward before pausing. With a deep breath, I briefly glanced behind me, relieved that the little girl was too distracted to hear me.

“Fine! Fine! I saw them running that way, okay?” She pointed with a shaking finger. “Terra… she chased after them and… I'm just worried for her, okay? Someone like her wouldn't know how dangerous being alone in the night can be and she… she might…”

She rubbed her arms, her eyes narrowed as if remembering a nasty memory. The cool persona I came to know crumbled for a brief moment, revealing a scared girl worried for her friend’s safety.

The anger fled my body and in came an underlying understanding. She really does care, huh?

“Rachel,” I said. “Don't worry about her. Terra… she's a lot stronger than you think. If I know her as well as I do, then nobody could ever take her down when she's serious.”

My legs carried me forward and I stepped out of the light. “And even if she couldn't, there's always gonna be someone she could count on. Someone who will always be right behind her.” I chuckled, legs spread apart in a dramatic stance and my arms forming a pose. “After all, I'm gonna become the greatest champion in the world. It wouldn't look good for me if my rival goes down to a petty thief!”

And with that, I was off.



I took twists and turns, taking paths through the grossest, shadiest alleys around. But even after a couple of minutes of searching, I still came short of finding that crook. It didn't help that I ran off before remembering to ask for the thief’s appearance and… well, I wasn't that familiar with the city’s layout so I understandably got lost.

But I had to keep going, for that little girl’s sake, for Rachel and… for Terra.

Despite what I said to Rachel, I couldn't say I wasn't a little worried about Terra. I knew how hot-headed and impulsive she could be, and the trouble she constantly attracted.

I turned a corner and was treated to more unknown buildings. Damn it, if only I knew where I was–wait a second, Klick! She could help me here.

Wasting no time, I sent out my Starly. Having a bird’s eye view would speed things up tremendously. “Klick, I need you to help me look around. If you spot any shady men, come down and show me the way, okay?”

She nodded with a serious look before taking off as I continued searching. I just had to find someone acting like a suspicious man, how hard could it be?

After ten minutes of unproductive ground searching, Klick came to me with more intel. She guided me through a labyrinth of alleyways, apparently she saw a masked person running in circles around here. I couldn't believe my luck. What kind of thief got lost in a city they lived in?

As I entered the alleyway, I caught a glimpse of the man behind the theft and immediately began the chase. He was trying to shake me off, taking sharp twists and turns but Klick steered me true. Eventually, we reached a dead-end and I saw the man.

It was a guy, a normal plain-looking man. Short, black hair, average height, average features covered by a face mask that didn't hide his identity as well as he thought it did. But he was so average-looking that if it wasn't for his weird astronaut cosplay, it would've been impossible to recognise the man. Though strangely, the guy did look somewhat familiar, like I’d seen someone wearing that outfit before.

The man clicked his tongue as he neared the dead end. “Ah.”

I rounded the corner with my Starly, shooting a glare that could melt concrete at the man. “Give it up, thief. Hand over her Pokémon!”

He turned around, scoffing. “A kid? That's who found me?” His hand reached into his pockets to pull out… a cyan wig? “Run away, brat. I don't have time to deal with someone like you.”

Shaking off the confusion, I expanded my second pokéball and threw it down.

“Fine, don't say I didn't warn you.” Donning the new hairdo, the man sent out his own Pokémon: a Budew and a Zubat. “Stun Spore and Bite. Take down that Chimchar!”

“Taunt! Stop that Budew and Klick, push that Zubat away!”

The Budew took in a breath, its body glowing a sickly yellow but Sun ran at it, raging up a stream of insults. My Starly flew over in the blink of an eye, a white blur slamming into the Zubat and crashing it into a wall.

The thief's eyes narrowed and he gritted his teeth, groaning. “Fine! Attack! Budew, Poison Sting! Zubat, stop lying around and do something!”

“Sun, dodge it and get close! Klick, keep that Zubat down!”

Needles launched out of the little bud Pokémon’s body but Sun was quick enough to react, kicking off against the ground and leaping over the needles before using his momentum to strike hard on the Budew. Klick continued her attacks, moving faster and faster as she continuously slammed her body into the Zubat, keeping it from getting up.

Usually, I wouldn't be resorting to unsporting tactics like attacking someone while they were down but criminals didn't deserve such niceties.

The thief gritted his teeth, snarling in visible frustration and shouting out commands.

Budew was down, Sun had it pinned to the ground, slashing it with his claws and making sure it couldn't fight back. Klick kept disappearing from view, becoming nothing but a white blur as she struck the Zubat over and over.

I was doing it. I was winning. I couldn't help the grin as the man snarled. I just had to keep this momentum up then I could get them back for her. “Finish them, guys! We can’t waste any more time on this scum–”

“Enough!” The man growled, cursing out as he unclipped another pokéball, ignoring his downed Budew. “Useless! Can't even finish off a damn beginner! Fine! You asked for this, kid. Scyther! Quick Attack and take out that Chimchar!”

My heart dropped like a stone. A Scyther? How on earth did someone like him have a–I sucked in a gasp. No time to gawk.

“Move away, Sun. To your right!”

My eyes followed the trajectory of the ball as it landed and in a flash of light, a Scyther stood there, its wings buzzed with the sound of a hundred blades. In the second it took for my eyes to process the Pokémon, it was already gone.

Sun couldn't even shout before he fell.

“Sun!” No, no no no, my starter was fine, wasn't he? That red, that… that couldn't be–I shook my head, I had to stay focused, think of something before it was too late. “Klick!”

Her wings were glowing. Wing Attack? No, I couldn't lose focus. Please, please, please! I fumbled for my pokéball, a potion, anything I could get to turn the tides.

Klick went in, wings shining brightly as she fought. The Scyther reached her in an instant, slicing across her chest meanwhile the Zubat used the opportunity presented to recover, hurrying to help with glowing fangs. My Starly, using her new move, parried the slashes but every time she did so, the Zubat bit down on her hard, redirecting her focus to the Poison-type which again allowed the Scyther to sneak in a blow.

It was a terrible sight to witness.

Klick was trying her best, she was trying so so damn hard and I-I couldn't do anything!

But by the time I fished out a potion, it was already too late.

The world crawled to a standstill, my eyes could fully see it coming, the glowing green scythe, the horror and pain on my Starly’s face, the cruel grin on that criminal’s ugly mug.

I blinked.

And everything went to hell.

The scythe came down, cutting through her with little resistance. Blood gushed out of her as my Starly collapsed, laying limply on the ground, her right wing landing uselessly beside her, her once proud expression twisting into one of pain and agony.

“No…” Tears welled up in my eyes and I ran, tried to run, tried to reach and hold onto my dying Pokémon. My feet stomped into the tarmac, my mind racing a million miles an hour. This couldn't be happening, this couldn't–

Three steps later.

My body broke down and everything burned.

I couldn't move, I couldn't lift a muscle, I couldn't think under the overwhelming pain. My eyes narrowed, my vision blurry as I glanced down at the source of the pain. I couldn't hold back the scream.

My-my arm! It was gone, my right arm! There was a lump, revealing cleanly-sliced bones from what remained of my shoulder.

It hurt it hurt it hurt.

My nerves were on fire, my chest writhed in pain. I couldn't breathe. My lungs felt heavy, my skin raw and stiff.

Everything hurts.

My vision was dimming, my hearing muted. White hot pain laced across my body, melting my arm, my limbs. My mind was scattered, my thoughts were a jumbled mess.

I screamed and screamed and screamed until I could no longer utter a whisper.

It was quiet. The warmth leaving my body, the wet slushy feeling of my blood pooling beneath me. My chest felt scorching, a fire so hot I could barely describe it even if my mind didn't feel so numb.

Was this really how it ended?

It's cold. It's so cold.

My mind was shivering, despite the heat, despite the intense fire, despite how warm I felt. My body was cold. Numb.

Feeling left me first; my arms, my legs, I couldn't feel the cold concrete under me. My breathing slowed. Every gasp was heavy, raspy, and tired, like my lungs were filled with lead. I was so damn exhausted.

But at least it wasn't hot anymore.

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision, shadows coiling just beyond what I could barely make out but close enough that I knew it was lurking, waiting to seize me up like a prized relic.

Help me…

Was this the end? Was I going to die?

“Help…”

It took everything from me to cry out.

No one replied.

No one was there.

I was going to die alone in a cold dark alley.

I'm scared.

I still had so much to live for. My dream, my ambition to be Sinnoh’s next champion, my promise to that little girl.

I don’t wanna die.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Mom… Terra… Rachel…

Somebody help me…

I was hearing things, muffled, looping and in the distance. There were sirens, there was screaming. The world was blurring, the shining red and blue lights coalescing and dimming.

I could see… something. Red hair? I felt something grabbing me. Was someone holding me? Were they saying something?

Wetness touched my cheeks and a familiar warmth enveloped me. “Cyg-Cygnus…”

I could barely feel, barely see, barely hear.

But even I knew who was holding me.

Terra…

I smiled, mustering up my final dredges of strength to move my hand and said,

“Heh… so, you're not perfect after all… I'm…gl…”

I wiped her tears.

And then I slipped…

… slowly and slowly into the darkness…

The last thing I heard were the agonised cries of my frie…



My alarm clock blared with a thunderous roar.

I awoke with a strangled gasp, my only arm instantly moving to grasp at my missing… missing arm?

I could feel it, my fingers, the flesh, the skin. What should’ve been a stump of cut bone and tissues was instead a fully functional and healthy arm. I took off my pyjamas in a daze, the numbing pain and sharp heat was still on my mind as I looked down at my chest and saw…

Nothing.

Not even a blemish or a scar.

My eyes glanced around, taking note of the familiar layout of the room. A poster of every regional champion hanging on the walls, my messy table littered with scattered notes, books and Pokémon figurines, and my regional starter Pokémon patterned blanket on the floor.

I was in my bed?

How… what happened?

I dragged myself off my bed, my mind was groggy, still reeling from the experience, the memory, the dream? My eyes wandered, finally settling on my still roaring alarm clock.

Eight thirty.

I'm... I'm back home?

My heart skipped a beat.

“This… this can't be…”

I ran down the stairs in a breathless sprint.

How was I alive?
 
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Chapter 3: Different

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Unhealthy amount of suppressing grief, guilt and a near mental breakdown

Beta-read by Tango


Is this… How… how am I here?

I was home. Back in my room. Sprinting out into the familiar hallway, and down the firm and solid wooden steps with hurried gasps.

Was this… was this a dream?

I was in the living room, my eyes trailing from one side of the room to the other, slowly, methodically. I scanned through the furniture of the living room, eyes lingering on each item for a second longer than I normally would've. There was the TV hanging on the comforting beige walls, the couches and sofas facing it, there was the coffee table in the middle, the same blue curtains all tied up that I barely gave a second glance when I left.

I looked down at my hands and flexed my fingers, my muscles tensing. The chill of the AC ran through my digits and arms. Yet despite the cold, I could feel sweat forming beneath my brows. This was real… wasn't it?

I pinched myself, hard enough for me to wince.

I could remember it. The burning pain. The numb dread of blood leaving my body. The crushing cold creeping into my skin and bones as my body desperately struggled to hold in the warmth. The horror I felt as everything dimmed and blurred into a mesh of shapes. I remembered it as vividly as it'd happened.

That criminal, my starter, that little girl, Rachel, the pain. The world was spinning. My breathing grew laboured. My heart pounding like a set of drums in a concert. What happened? How did this happen? How was I here? How was I…

… alive?

My stomach churned, bile burning my throat.

Terra…

I remembered her face, the tears streaming down her cheeks, her crimson hair that once shone as bright as the sun, had hung off her head like a thread of torn silk. Her eyes burning with a bitter cocktail of grief, despair and wrath.

I shook my head, tearing myself out of my mind. The bile still lingered in my throat but the smell coming from the kitchen reminded me of reality, grounding me back to life. There was the scent of something crispy, meaty, along with a warmth tasting like sweets embracing me. It helped push back the horror of a life that was gone and I couldn't help the smile painting my face.

Mom…

She was in the kitchen right now, humming out a tune that I recognised from her favourite musical. A cheery, happy song that held fond memories of a time that was a bit less lonely.

I steeled myself, looking at my backpack hanging on the railing. I should get going. I was going to be late. But at the same time, my feet stay rooted to the floor.

Her smile came into my mind. “...next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”

I should stay for a bit, talk with her, chat with her. Something to get my mind off of that… that…

Whatever that was.

My legs carried me into the kitchen where my mom was washing the dishes, looking all the world entrenched in her task. She was wearing a pretty pink blazer dress with a complimenting yellow apron draped over it. A wide smile was on her face and just looking at her sent a warmth through my body, soothing and comforting. Her presence alone was almost enough to make me forget about my horrific wake up.

My feet pattered against the floor as I made my way to my seat where there was already a plate of fresh made bacon and pancakes on the table.

“Good morning, Cygnus,” my mother said, turning around with a smile. The corners of her mouth curled up in amusement when she saw my pyjamas. “I knew you were excited for today. But I hope you didn't forget to change before going to the professor, I could imagine they got quite the sight with you there.”

I didn't respond to the teasing. Too busy staring at my plate as I held the fork and spoon, the cool metal in my hands chilling down to my bones. I took a bite out of my meal, savouring the taste of the juicy grease and the sweetness of the pancakes in my mouth. It was warm, comforting, and familiar.

I chewed on my food, the thoughts about my morning swirling in my head. There was something I wanted to ask her, something to truly confirm my suspicions. With a gulp, I swallowed my nerves and steeled myself. “Mom?”

My mom’s smile fell upon hearing my voice, her eyes glistening with worry as concern creased her features. Her voice came out quiet, calm of emotions like all the times she comforted me when I was down. “Yes, sweetie?”

The question rolled under my tongue. My heart was racing, my throat felt tight and the words hurt to even think about. Could I even ask her something like this? Would she think I was weird for asking?

Would she believe there was something wrong with me?

I bit my lip, second guessing, fearing. I craned my neck to look up, and the sight of her worrying eyes pulled at my heart, wringing the words out of me. “What… what day is it?”

And… do you remember anything? I managed to bite it down.

There was silence. A long, awkward and tense pause that skittered under my skin like an unpleasant itch. My mom was contemplating, setting the plate into the sink as her frown deepened. “Huh,” she murmured to herself, her eyes scrunching up in confusion. “It's Monday, isn't it? Your big day, Cygnus? I thought you already got your starter? Weren't you just taking a short nap before heading out…”

The lump in my throat felt heavy, settling inside me like a ball of lead. Yesterday was Monday. My fork tapped against the plate. I'm in the past? No. I shook my head. That's… that's not possible.

Things like time travel were myths, legends. Ones where people saved the world or solved calamities. Not… of a random kid getting in trouble way too over their head. That just wasn't possible…



Then maybe…

Am I psychic?

What if that whole thing was a vision, a premonition of sorts? It made some sense. I remembered watching and reading interviews of famous psychic people back when I was volunteering for Professor Rowan’s class a few years ago. I remembered seeing a video of Kanto’s Sabrina using her future vision to predict some poor unfortunate folk falling from their window and saving him with her telekinesis without so much as blinking… so perhaps future vision was something that was very vivid and involved?

Hm… I don't know. I scratched the bottom of my chin in thought. If I really was psychic, shouldn't that mean I have other powers?

Teleportation, telekinesis, barriers. They were the standard amongst any psychic, and if I really was one then that meant I could do them, no?

Okay, let's start with the basics. I glanced down at the fork in my hand. With a deep breath, I closed my eyes and channelled all of my mental strength into… the… thing…



Nothing happened.

Okay, so I don't have telekinesis. I set the fork down with a sigh. Ugh, I have no idea what's going on anymore.

I picked at the scraps remaining on my plate, mostly just staring at the bits getting punctured by the metal. The thoughts and questions brewed heavily in my head and to be honest, I was getting tired of thinking about them.

There was a blur of motion in the corner of my eyes, tearing me away from my thoughts. I blinked, swerving my head towards the living room. Mom? She was running up the stairs in a flurry of action, her footsteps thumping upstairs like an amateur drummer. What was she doing?

Putting my plate and utensils into the sink, I stepped out of the kitchen just in time to see my mom running downstairs with her hair ragged and eyes livid as she stared right into my soul.

I took a step back before my vision was blocked out as she threw clothes at my face.

“Get dressed! Get ready and get out! You're going to march over to Professor Rowan and explain to him why you're late! And if I see not a single Pokémon by your side when you come back, you're going to be grounded until next year!”

My heart leapt into my throat and I gulped in fear. I darted over to the kitchen, rapidly changing my clothes and running back into the living room where my mom stood, holding my bag. Her glare was sharp and livid but deep down, I knew it was because she didn't want me to lose my chances of receiving a regional starter.

Though that didn't mean I wasn't absolutely terrified of her. I took my bag off her hands, face pale in fright and bursted out the door like the wind before a storm.



Something was wrong.

Something was terribly, horribly, impossibly wrong.

This shouldn't be possible, there was no way, absolutely no way in heck this was correct.

So what could possibly be so bad that it had me pacing back and forth in my room like I was trying to drill a trench with my feet? Well…

Before meeting up with the professor, I was ecstatic, excited about reuniting with my Chimchar. Then when time came to receive him, things sorta went downhill. It was really eerie honestly. Things played out almost two for two with my vision: from their dancing around my late arrival and down to the vehement denial of my starter. Their firm denials left me feeling nervous and anxious after the umpteenth attempt of shaking them down.

For a moment, I thought that maybe I was wrong, that maybe I really did have a weird dream. I left the lab in a daze, hurt, confused and in disarray. Thankfully Lucas came in to dispel all my worries. I had never felt so relieved, so happy that I wasn't wrong, that I didn't just squander my chances of becoming a trainer, of making up with Sun.

Heat crept onto my cheeks as I remembered the moment. The part where I cried and slobbered over him like a little kid. The sheer relief I felt as the anxiety exploded out of my body.

I can never show my face to him again.

Dread crawled down my spine as I let out a long and suffering groan as another memory assaulted my mind. Why did I have to pose like that in front of him? Why can't I just be normal? Aaaaaahhh!

An-anyway, after enduring the cringe of my horrible past mistakes, I swung my eyes towards the beanbag across my room, specifically at my starter, lazing around and attempting to become one with the seat.

He was the very reason I was still in my room, having what one would normally call an ‘existential crisis’.

What seemed to be the problem? Well… there was a glaring issue with my starter, a problem that rocked me down to my core when I first released him.

And that was the fact that my starter wasn't my life partner, Sun the Chimchar.

But instead a Torchic.

A Torchic!

I had a Torchic!

How?!

How did this even happen? How did me staying back for breakfast change things so badly that my Chimchar got replaced by a Torchic? How on Earth was there even a Torchic in the first place? I remembered the special program Professor Rowan did on TV a while back where he showcased and talked about our regional starters. Never once did he ever entertain the idea that he'd be diverting things from the norm. It just didn't make sense for him to change things like that.

So what happened? How did things change so badly that my starter was different?

I looked down at the notebook in my hands. My notes looked messy, more so than they usually did. Words, ideas and theories were all sprawled over each other, with arrows pointing from and to random notes. I let out a sigh, this wasn't working. I was going in circles here.

I clicked my tongue. I should get going. Maybe I could get something from Jubilife’s library instead, see if there was anything that could explain all of this.

“Return.” I reached out with my pokéball and slung my backpack over my shoulders.

Time to get going.

It was around ten when I reached Route 202. A lot earlier than the last time I got here. But I couldn't risk getting distracted when there was so much to do. I had to get to the city quickly. That criminal was still out there, ready to prey on that unsuspecting little girl.

I trekked through the tall grass without concern nor caution, risky but I didn't want to waste time here. My mind was racing as I moved, churning out ideas and strategies to fight that criminal.

Klick was incredible during her fight against that Scyther. If I could find her and focus on teaching her Wing Attack quicker, there was a higher chance of us winning.

I tried to remember exactly where I found her, my eyes darting left and right. Trying to find any clues or trails that was familiar–

A tiny blur of blue fur attacked me.

It knocked me off my feet, sending me back first into the grass as I felt little fangs digging into my arm. Naturally, I mustered every tiny bit of training and knowledge I'd accrued over the past decade to prevail in this crisis.

“Aaaah! Get off me get off me get off me!” I struggled, I screamed, I panicked, waving my arms around like a maniac as I tried desperately to make it let go. But no matter how hard I tried, it wouldn't let go! I could feel its teeth sinking deeper. Aaahh! I had to think of something quick!

Come on. Stop panicking. Stop panicking! Think, think! What can I do? What– wait, I got it!

I held out my free arm and curled my index and middle finger, tensing my muscles before jabbing it in the stomach. It gagged, and I used the opportunity to swing it away.

“Hah!” I clambered to my feet, wincing slightly at the pain in my arm. It wasn't bleeding so I took that as a victory. “Take that! You can't sneak up on someone like–Gah!”

I leapt to the side, evading a bolt of electricity. The Shinx was glowing brightly, electricity running up its forelegs as it launched another attack. Pushing myself back onto my feet, I sprinted, screaming like my life depended on it. Bolts of lightning came at me in an endless barrage, not once giving me a moment to catch my breath.

“Gah!” One tore into the ground just ahead of me, blowing dust and smoke into my eyes. I coughed, an arm raised to rub at my eyes while I took the chance to swipe my other hand down into my belt. “G-go, Su–Torchic!”

I threw the ball with all my might, trusting my Torchic to deal with that Shinx while I caught my breath.

The cloud of dust and smoke died down after a few seconds. The attacks had also stopped. I assumed that my Torchic had…

I blinked, looking down at the pokéball still clipped on my belt. “Wait a second…” This wasn’t right. My Torchic was still with me, but then what the heck did I throw?

Then as if to answer my inquiry, I saw something glinting under the sunlight, red and white. Realisation settled under my chest as it made way for disbelief.

I caught it?

Huh?

I don't know how long I'd stayed there just staring at the pokéball. At some point, my Torchic had gotten out and started pecking my shins with a bored look. But the fact that I somehow caught a Shinx by complete accident was perplexing. How in the world did that even happen–

One quick slap to the face later, I moved forward. Though my arms and legs were still shaking with nerves even as the adrenaline wore off. Those lightning attacks were far too close for comfort and while I knew that recently caught Pokémon couldn't escape on their own until the four hour gracing period was over, I couldn't exactly quell the anxiety simmering in me.

That Shinx had been gunning for me and while most Pokémon in Route 202 could barely hurt someone, let alone kill. I couldn't shake off that fear. Getting electrocuted once was bad enough.

I shuddered at the memory that resurfaced, of that time when Terra brushed a Pikachu the wrong way…

A-anyway, I took the pokéball in my hands, gazing at it apprehensively. My Torchic was standing beside me with a serious expression that looked odd on his usually lazy face.

As I stared at the pokéball in my hand, a rather stupid idea crawled onto my mind.

I could… I could use this.

A Shinx against a Scyther and a Zubat? If I played it out correctly, I could very well beat that criminal. An Electric-type like Shinx against two Flying-types? And looking back at the fight, I'd felt a deeply unnatural fear seep into my mind. Someone as small as a Shinx wouldn't have been able to scare me that badly despite the memories associated with its typing. No, that suggested it might have Intimidate, a seriously useful ability that could be an incredible asset at my disposal–

I shook my head. This was stupid, really stupid. Was I really thinking of befriending something that tried to zap me countless of times? Was I insane?

But the memories of that vision came to mind. That criminal, the way he treated his team, the cruel gleam in that Scyther’s eyes. If they were willing to kill someone like me…

I gritted my teeth, my grip on the pokéball tightening. I wasn't going to let it or that thief hurt anyone!

“Torchic, get ready. I'm gonna let this guy out and in case it attacks, I'll need you to hold it back.”

“Torch!”

“Alright, come on out!” I braced myself for impact as a red light popped out of the ball.

The first thing the Shinx did was look around. It blinked, a puzzled expression on its face. The little guy was kinda cute when… y’know, it wasn't trying to eat me. It glanced around, brows screwing together before its gaze finally settled on me.

I took a step back, fighting down the unnatural shudder as I held eye contact. Its gaze was intense, not something you'd expect from a Pokémon as big as my wrist but thankfully, it broke away, having noticed my starter glaring daggers at it. The Shinx met his gaze, locking eyes with a tiny smirk on its face.

My Torchic didn't back down from the challenge, his feathers bristling and puffing up in an attempt to intimidate the Shinx.

The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut. For a second, I was prepared for it to lunge at me or charge up an attack. But none of that happened as the little cub was the first to break off their stare down, its smirk morphing into a wide grin as it reared its head back. I expected a roar, a growl or a hiss, something that would belie its cute appearance, but instead it laughed, guffawing like it heard a gut busting joke.

What? What was going on? I looked down, seeing my starter sharing my confusion. He had no clue what was happening either.

I opened my mouth to speak but was cut off when it suddenly leapt forward, a foreleg lifted above its head.

Was it saluting?

“Shinx! Shinx shi shinx!” it exclaimed, loudly and proudly. It brought down its paw, moving forward as if asking for a handshake.

What?

My Torchic only gave the extended paw a deadpan stare, murmuring something to the Shinx before shaking his head and laying down, nuzzling up against the dirt and grass.

The Shinx tried to get him to stand back up, posturing, gesturing and outright posing in an oddly familiar way. But nothing was working, so instead it gave up and gave me the most appalled and offended look as if I had anything to do with my starter’s behaviour.



This had to be a joke, right? The universe was laughing at me. There was no way I'd gone two for two with catching the weirdest Pokémon. I thought Klick was supposed to be an outlier. Why was this Shinx equally as weird as well?

I let out a groan and collapsed onto the ground. “Are all my Pokémon going to be this weird?”



It didn't take long for me to get over that dramatic little episode as I still hadn't achieved what I intended to do. Tracking down that feisty Starly.

My Shinx was rummaging around, eyes narrowed and whiskers twitching. She insisted on staying by my side after I explained to her what I was doing. At first, she looked confused at my words but after a terribly played-out game of charades and incoherent meowing, she shrugged and moved on.

I didn't question it too much. Having future vision didn't exactly mean I could understand Pokémon any better than I usually did. She probably just thought I was gonna head to the city first and was confused why I wasn't.

The field of grass around me was as dry and dull as the past five minutes of walking. The awe and wonder I had when I began my journey was fading and I couldn't fathom how my past–er future self(?) was able to do all of this exercise without getting tired.

I heaved a gasp, internally cursing myself for only doing the bare minimum in PE. If only I'd accepted my mom’s offer to run in the morning…

“Shinx! Shinx!”

My Pokémon called for my attention as she gestured around with a paw. Did she find something?

I glanced around. The area surrounding us was barren, the grass gave way to a small open patch of dirt. Yet, there was something about this place that felt oddly familiar to me. A small rocky formation near the outskirts, a little ant hill a few feet to my left and…

Wait, this was it! This was where I found her! I didn't know why it took me so long to find this place but this should be where Klick… huh.

There was no one here.

She wasn't–

This isn't right. Where is she? She's supposed to be here.

I looked left then I looked right, seeing nothing but the empty sky and dirt. I ran around, overturning every rock and pushing through the tall grass close to me.

But she wasn't here.

Was it because I was too early? Did someone already catch her? Was this another one of the changes? Did knowing my future cause things to change so badly that not even Klick was safe? I grinded my teeth in frustration.

Of course, she wasn't safe! Why would she? Sun disappeared, replaced by a Torchic! Why did I think she wouldn't be gone either?

You stupid, idiotic, imbecile!

I dropped to my knees and heaved a sigh, clutching my head. Why? Why did I have to charge head first into that situation so recklessly? If I hadn't gone after that thief, if I had asked for help, if I hadn't run off, then maybe… maybe they wouldn't have died!

My nails dug into the dirt as I choked out a cry, my fists slamming into the ground, over and over as I lost myself to the rage.

It was all my fault! All my fault! All my gods damned fault!

Because of me, everything became different! Because of me, everything was wrong! It was because of me that they died a horrible and painful death.

It was all my fault…

It was–

“–Shinx!”

Something pushed me onto my back. There was something, no someone on my chest. There was the crisp smell of smoke dangling in the air, I could feel the ends of my hair standing up, and my body tingled with a weak ache.

What happened? Why do I feel like I just stuck a fork into a socket?

“Shinx!”

My head swung up, hands wiping off the sweat trickling down my head. There was dampness on my cheeks and my vision was a little blurry. I blinked, feeling the tears prickling at the edges of my eyes. Had I been crying?

“Shin shinx!”

I winced a bit from her claws poking into my chest. Her eyes were wide, full of concern, and her lips trembled in worry and confusion. She mewed, pawing at my clothes, trying to understand what was going on.

A light chuckle escaped my lips, but the sound wasn't one of mirth. I was such a loser. Like, just look at me, crying like a little kid just because of something as silly as things not going my way. It was pathetic. I should be better than that. I had to be. My vision was just that, a vision. It wasn't real and… even if it was, I didn't even know Sun and Klick for that long, I shouldn't be crying about them like this.

I was better than this.

“I'm fine. I'm fine,” I said, pushing my lips into a reassuring smile and softening my gaze to show her there was nothing to worry about. “Sorry, I guess I was just a tiny bit disappointed with not finding a Starly. It's no big deal.”

She didn't look convinced but she got off me when I asked.

The smile on my face was as firm as always as I shrugged, acting nonchalant. “Come on, let’s get going. Jubilife City’s like a ten minute walk away. If we hurry, we can reach it in five.”

“Shiiinx.”

“I’m fine.”

Because I really was. There was no real reason to dwell on the past.

I snapped my fingers. “Oh right, there's something I forgot I have to do.”

I turned my head down, ignoring the unease in my chest. “Why don't we come up with a name for you and my starter before we reach the city? What do you think about Bolt or Watt?”

“Shinx.” She shook her head and while I knew she wanted to continue the previous topic, she reluctantly followed me as I continued to act like nothing had happened as I came up with more shocking and amazing names.



I made it to the city an hour before noon. Yet, I couldn't focus on the city and its noise. My mind was spinning. My hands were shaking, the pencil in my grip trembling. The words on my notebook were scratched, scribbled on like a toddler’s first attempt at writing a sentence.

There were people walking by me, paying little attention to my barely concealed nerves.

After figuring out a name for both my Shinx and Torchic, which by the way were Volta and Camp respectively. I encountered a few Pokémon that didn't quite fit what I remembered. A Mareep. It was a Pokémon that wouldn't usually be found on Route 202. I'd initially dismissed it, thinking that it had probably gotten lost from like a migrating herd or something. Things like that happened from time to time.

But then the next few ambushes opened my eyes. I found a Ponyta, which was odd but again, it could be explained as a lost member of a migrating herd. An unlikely coincidence, sure. And the same could be said with the Abra I locked eyes with. Though that one was more likely to be an accidental teleport than a lost herd member as Abra were a more solitary Pokémon.

Those instances weren't exactly common per se, but it made enough sense for my mind to not linger too long on.

But then, I was ambushed by two Pokémon that weren't even native to Sinnoh.

Two Litleo.

The sight burned into my mind, the confusion and shock rocked my body. Thankfully, I was able to regain my composure and defeat those two but still…

How? Why? What did I do to cause a change this massive?

I thought my vision was a type of future vision, me seeing a potential future and not… whatever the heck was happening right now. None of the books and stories I'd read about time travel or prophecies had anything like this happened in them. So what the heck was going on?

I glanced around, watching the people around me mingling about with their day. Nobody had even made a single mention nor realised something was wrong when I asked one of them about the Litleo. Their answers were simple, answers that you'd expect from asking someone about a Route’s potential encounters.

“Oh, you've managed to find one?"

“They're pretty rare but it's not like you can't find them if you try."

“Yeah, what about it? They've been around for a while now."


A chill ran down my spine as realisation set deep in my veins. All of them were completely and utterly normal, nonchalant. Like having a Kalosian Pokémon in Sinnoh was ‘normal’.

There was a question that latched itself onto my skull then, one that I shoved deep into the recesses of my soul but lingered in the back of my mind.

Did I die and change timeli–

I didn't want to entertain this anymore.

No.

I took in a deep breath, a powerful, heavy inhale. Empty my mind. Hold for four, exhale for four and then inhale for four. In and out. In and out. Until finally my heart rate slowed, my mind felt less foggy and the tension in my shoulders relaxed a bit.

Panicking wasn't going to help me. I shouldn't focus too much on something I can't control.

I looked down at my notebook and shook my head. No, what I needed was knowledge, information about that criminal, about training. I could figure out these weird changes later. For now, I needed to prepare. Lunch could wait. I needed to get to the library. Find some books on Type Energy, history and whatever I could get my hands on for training.

I walked onward, the hustle and bustle of the city was heavy, as it should be. Today was the beginning of a lot of hopes and dreams after all. There was a lot of chatter around me. I could hear snippets about the excitement of starting their journey, parents encouraging and nagging their kids on what and how they should keep themselves safe, and the city Pokémon all chirping amongst themselves.

It was a peaceful and charming sight, one that I'd seen over the many years of wishing and hoping to be a part of. A small prideful smile wormed its way onto my face. I was one of the lucky few to be given a starter. While it wasn't exactly who I'd been expecting, I couldn't deny that my efforts and hard work weren't rewarded.

It was nearing noon and I was feeling a bit peckish but I shrugged it off with practiced ease. Satisfying my hunger could wait until after I was done researching.

I stopped in front of a stoplight, waiting for the colours to switch as eyes wandered around in boredom. That was when I spotted somebody struggling to walk, with heavy bags weighing her every step. It was an old lady with grey hair, short stature and despite her visibly struggling to walk, her posture was very firm and confident.

For a second, I debated. And then the next, I slapped myself. I couldn't believe I'd even entertain the thought of abandoning someone in need. Shoving others away to save another wasn't kindness, it was selfishness disguised as helping.

I strolled over, putting on my most charming smile. “Hi, need some help with those, miss?”

The old lady gave me a smile and shook her head. “I appreciate the offer, sonny. But these old bones of mine aren't so old that they can't hold onto a few groceries.”

A few? I raised a brow. Those look like they could feed a family of four for an entire week!

“Are you sure? I don't really have anything important I have to do at the moment… and you look like you need the help.”

There was a silence, or well as quiet as it could be in a city nearing lunch hour. The old lady was looking at me with a scrunched up expression that was supposed to be intimidating but was undermined by how her body was shaking from the exertion.

Gradually with my amazing charm, I was able to persuade her, taking her bags off her hands, and er… nearly stumbling over when I miscalculated how heavy they were.

“... kids these days have too much respect for their elders.”

Isn't that… a good… thing? I wrested the bags into a better position. Gah, just how much stuff did she buy?

“Look at you, boy. Already strugglin’. Come now, at least hand me a bag or two.”

“No, ma’am. I already said I was gonna do it… I'm not backing down from this…”

Seeing the determined gleam in my eyes, she sighed. “Kids these days… all as stubborn as Mudsdale. And here I thought my own granddaughter was an exception.”

She walked along the street, leading me to where I assume was the direction of her home. Her gait was slow though I didn't know whether it was because of her age or because she was taking pity on me.

I staggered forward, managing to catch up to her. “You have a granddaughter, miss? Is she a trainer too?” I mean, it would make sense why this old lady was carrying groceries all on her lonesome.

“A trainer?” She shook her head and chuckled as if the idea was too incredulous. “The day that’d happen would be the day Arceus falls from the sky.”

“Why's that? Are her grades really that bad?” People flunking out of their exams weren't unheard of but I couldn't really understand how someone could do so. It wasn't like the basic exams were difficult.

She didn't respond, instead glancing to the side. I followed her gaze, into the nearby park and saw a figure standing out on the brick path. The person was short, not much shorter than I was. They were holding a garbage bag in one hand and a poking stick in the other.

I glanced back at the old lady, seeing the fond recognition and smile on her face. Ah, so that means…

“Is that her?”

“Mm… always so hard working and diligent. I don't know where she gets it from, to be honest. Certainly not from me,” she muttered. “You’d think a child like Charlotte would fool around and enjoy their life like everyone else. But she always pushes herself way too hard, taking on so many odd jobs to keep herself busy…”

I tuned out the rest of the conversation, my eyes swerving and locking back onto the figure in a new light. Charlotte? Is she the same…

As if hearing my thoughts, the girl suddenly turned around, her eyes widening in surprise. Then with a quick shake of her head, she narrowed her gaze, hands tightening their hold on her equipment as she walked towards us.

As she approached, and no longer standing beneath the trees’ shadows, I got a clearer look at Charlotte. Her hair was a soft pink, tied up in a ponytail and flowing down to her shoulders like a wreath of cherry blossoms. She wore a very casual outfit, consisting of an orange tee, a blue skirt that reached down her knees, a standard issue albeit worn Silphco backpack and an ugly green pair of gloves. There was dirt and grime sticking to her hair and clothes along with sweat trickling down her head. It looked like she'd been working for a while.

My eyes trailed back up to her face, and I took a step back. Her brown eyes, once dull with pain and tears, glowed with a flame that demanded answers. She was initially set on storming to her grandmother but that stopped upon noticing me.

“Who are you?” The fierce and suspicious glare on her face shook me to my core. Was this seriously the same girl? “What are you doing with my grandma?”

“I…”

The words died in my mouth before they could form as I glanced over to her grandma, finding the old lady giving me a very amused grin and I resisted the urge to sigh.

I took in a deep breath and forced a grin onto my face. “Hey, hey, the name’s Cygnus Plein! Beginner trainer and future Champion of the whole world!” If my hands weren't occupied at the moment, I would most definitely be showing off my conviction by striking a pose. But since they were, I settled for puffing my chest out and exuding an awesome aura of confidence.

“...”

“...”

H-hey! What's with the looks?

Was it the chest thing?

Their expressions were still as blank as ever, the awkwardness that dawned on us practically told me the answer.

... it was, wasn't it? I'd probably look cooler if I had my hands free right now… I mean, all the other kids and elders thought it was cool back home...

Charlotte turned to her grandmother, not paying attention to my amazing pose. “And what are you doing here, granny? I thought I told you to stay at home until I get back! You know you shouldn't be running around at your age.”

“Ah, I ain't that old, silly girl. Certainly not old enough to not go grocery shopping.”

My eye twitched at the blatant lie. I beg to differ.

“Groceries?” Charlotte repeated, blinking in confusion. “Eh?! What do you mean ‘groceries’? You shouldn't be going out and getting groceries. That's my job!”

She spun on her heel, pointing a rather indignant finger at me. “You, weirdo!”

… I think my heart just shattered.

“Give me those bags and get lost! I don't need some… some… punk hanging out with my granny! And don't you think I can't hear you snickering, granny! You're not out of the woods. You're gonna go straight home and enjoy your elderly life doing elderly things or else!”

“And what if I want to add grocery shopping to my ‘elderly things’, dear?” If looks were a Pokémon move, Charlotte’s glare would be super effective against steel. Her grandmother sighed and made to leave. “Fine. Fine. You're no fun.”

“And you're old enough to need a cane!” Charlotte shouted at her grandmother’s retreating figure. “Lunch’s already made and in the fridge so don't you dare exert yourself!”

The old lady only brought up a hand in response, waving back without looking.

“Ugh, she’s way too energetic for someone her age.” The pinkette huffed, turning to me with a raised brow. “You're still here? I thought I told you to leave the bags and scram.”

The poking from her stick snapped me back into reality, and I took a moment to pick up the pieces of my shattered ego. “Are you sure? These bags are pretty heavy and you're not exactly…”

“What? I'm not ‘what’ exactly?” she said with a scowl that was cuter than it was intimidating. “Are you looking down on me? I'll have you know that I've been doing these things on my own for a long time and I never had any trouble!”

Honestly, it was kinda hard not to look down on her with how much she was pouting and the height difference was making it really hard to take her feisty personality seriously.

“Excuse me?”

Oops, did I say that out loud?

“You're not any taller than I am!” She snarled, pointing an accusatory finger. “You're probably not even a trainer, are you? Just a weirdo with a fake name trying to prey on unsuspecting innocent little girls. Well, I'm not buying it, bucko! So put ‘em down!”

A fake name? Weirdo? Each word pierced my heart like an arrow. Am I really that bad?

Not willing to subject myself anymore to this psychological torture, I handed her the bags, trying not to wince when she nearly fell on her face from the weight. “Hey, maybe I should–”

“No! You stay where you are… I can… I can handle this…” Her legs were shaking and her arms quivering. Surprisingly, she managed to move a couple of feet into the park… before collapsing and scattering the contents of the bags.

I rushed over to her, making sure not to step on anything and crouched down to check on her. “Are you okay?”

She pushed my hands away, not meeting my eyes as she looked at the fallen groceries and trash. “I'm fine. I don't need your help.” She made a move to get up but hesitated, letting out a pained hiss.

She tried to hide it behind a snarl but I could tell she hurt something during that fall. My eyes trailed down, noticing the rather ugly bruise that was now exposed on her knee. It was purple, black and blue with a distinct white streak across it like something had drained the blood out of her. It was Pokémon inflicted, that much I could diagnose but from what, was a mystery to me.

“Are you sure? That looks a little–”

“I don't need your pity.” Charlotte glowered, trying to push herself up and groaning when she failed.

I wasn't discouraged, instead reaching into my backpack. I pulled out a tube of ointment, one made with medicinal herbs and various berries like oran and pecha to help with recovery and pain relief. “Here, something to help with the pain. A bruise like that can cause quite the problems for you in the future, especially if you leave it untreated. And I can't imagine it to be comfortable.”

She looked at the offered item like it was a trap but between my patient smile and genuine concern shining from my eyes. Charlotte caved, taking it from me and avoiding eye contact. She was quiet, still looking uncertain while she applied the ointment, only letting out a soft hiss of pain.

As she did that, I gathered up all the fallen groceries. Honestly, it was pretty fortunate her granny bought mostly canned food, with the few non-canned stuff being bagged instead. With how much my mom complained about food prices these days, I couldn't stomach the thought of having to throw half of these away.

Charlotte had gotten up at some point, the medicine doing its job rather well as the swelling lessened and some parts of her skin returned to their normal colours. Terra sure did know her stuff, made me wonder where I could get some for myself since last I checked Sandgem’s local stores never had any that worked this fast.

Now if only she could stop throwing them at me for safekeeping because she constantly misplaced hers on a weekly basis.

The little girl kept her head down, crouching low to sweep the junk and trash into her bag. I wanted to help but a particularly fierce glare was sent my way and I didn't wanna push my luck. When she was done, she took in a deep breath and walked up to me, eyes still locked on everywhere but my face.

“Th-thank you… for… the help.” The words came out slowly, as if she wasn't used to expressing herself. I couldn't help but smile at the sight of her reddened cheeks.

Aw, she’s so cute.

“You're welcome. I'm glad I could be of use.”

The tip of her ears went red as she fumbled with the trash bag in her hands before handing me the ointment. “He-here.”

“Keep it.” I pushed her hand away as she protested. “Take it as a token of goodwill. And besides, you're still gonna need it anyway. A bruise like that will need a few days to completely heal.”

“Right…” she said, an uncertainty staining her eyes.

A bout of silence settled between us and I let my eyes wander around. The park was empty, calm and devoid of people. There was a fountain in the center, sparkling under the sunlight, it looked well maintained and pretty. Trees were all around us, oak wood looming over us like silent guardians. I even spotted a few Pidgey and Swellow making the branches their home.

It was an unfamiliar but peaceful sight. One that released some tension from my shoulders despite my knowing that Swellow and Pidgey weren't native to Jubilife.

Ignoring the thoughts that were urging me to study this strange phenomenon, I looked back at Charlotte. The little girl was fidgeting with her poking stick and she looked like she was trying to find the words to say something.

“Why don't I help you hold onto these while you work?” I said. “I'll even be nearby so you'll know I won't just skedaddle with these.”

She chewed on her lips before nodding. “Okay, just sit on one of the benches. But… if you try anything…” Her threat didn't hold as much vitriol as it previously did, she mostly just sounded bewildered.

I only smiled and made to rest my legs, sagging into the firm yet comfortable benches. Letting go of the bags, I pulled out a bottle of water from my backpack and took a swig, the refreshing water cooling my tongue and stress.

Honestly, it really was odd, wasn't it? This whole chain of events. I hadn't expected to find Charlotte after helping a random old lady. It was weird, extremely weird seeing this side of her. I never could’ve imagined her to be so feisty, so filled with gusto and fire. She sorta reminded me of an angry Growlithe pup, prickly and constantly barking to hide her timid side.

I chuckled at the mental image before the memories of last night wiped away my mirth.

Last night…

The memory came to me. The memory of her crying, unresponsive and sobbing into the concrete. My fist clenched, the pencil shaking as I forced the anger down with a heavy breath. The flame I could see burning so vividly right now. It genuinely hurt me to see her like this and knowing what would happen tomorrow.

I'll save him for you, Charlotte. Just to keep that smile on your face. I nodded to myself, nails digging into my palm and solidifying my resolve. No matter what, I won't let another person lose their loved one!

“... Daisy! I thought I told you to–oh you're done already? Great job!”

Her voice drew me back into reality. I shook the cobwebs out of my head and turned my head. What I saw froze me in complete shock.

There, in front of Charlotte, was a small green Pokémon standing on all fours. Using vines that came from its neck, it dragged a garbage bag full of junk, smartly having used another vine to tie it up to prevent the trash from spilling.

“A-a Chikorita?” I sputtered.

She has a Chikorita?
 
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Nekodatta

Pokémon Trainer
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. koraidon-apex
  2. miraidon-ultimate
  3. skitty
  4. dodrio
  5. litleo
  6. murkrow
Hi, I somehow never reviewed anything of you and this fic has been catching my eye for a while so here I am for the first chapter!
A Nuzlocke fic about Platinum where the human character is caught in a death loop is... Quite interesting. I'm always a fan of timeloop stories!

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision. The shadows writhed, dim reality coiling slowly, slowly, seizing me like a prized relic.
Really liked this image of "reality coiling", like it's something alive slowly circling him.

There were sirens, muffled screams and tears.
So he died somewhere public...

My alarm clock blared with a roar of a thousand howls.
This sentence feels a bit strange to me, I'm not sure the similarity works. A roar and a howl are two very different sounds in my mind, so if the alark clock is "blaring", it can't also be "roaring" and "howling" at the same time.

Thankfully, my back broke my fall.
Not quite sure it's something you should be thankful about, sounds painful...

The man who stared back with a pinched expression froze me right into my roots. He was tall, taller than the professor by half a head and practically twice my height. My breath hitched. The man looked dead, pale as a corpse. His cheeks were sunken, his eyes surrounded by dark rings like he hadn't slept in weeks. Despite his height, he was a skinny and lanky person, more bone than flesh with how his skin-tight suit stretched into his skin.
Oh hi Cyrus!! Big fan of his depiction here, always like it when his appearance is played up for maximum unsettling vibes.

Though oddly I couldn't help but feel like there was something familiar about the man. Like I had met him before.
Well isn't that ominous... I'm going to assume Cyrus is responsible for at least one death/reset.
And since you mentioned the resets will happen at "checkpoints", that should mean he died really early in his journey...

The professor sighed, stepping forward with a stern glare. “You were late.”
Following in Ash Ketchum's footsteps I see.

I bowed low, a textbook perfect ninety degrees angle and showing my sincerest gratitude to the professor. “Thank you.”
I think more than "and showing" something like "perfect ninety degrees angle to show my sincerest gratitude..." would work better

My very own regional starter! Years of blood, sweat and tears put into this very moment!
Will it actually be a regional starter? Feels a bit strange that they just randomly had one of the three laying around without having been claimed already.

Look, sweetie. I know how much you've been looking forward to this day and I'm happy you got your starter.” A gentle smile creased her features. “It’s just… next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”
Aw, mom probably also wanted to enjoy her kid's special day by having breakfast with him and seeing him off, so it must have hurt to be dismissed like that...

Surely, I couldn't mess up an easy strategy.
*such an easy strategy
Also, I was a bit surprised that the starter actually *was* a Chimchar. Not complaining because Chimchar is nice, but it's not clear if it's also the first time for Cygnus to see what's in the pokeball or if he opened it off screen.
For just having received his first Pokémon and probably dying to know what it is, it feels a bit strange that he just pops the Pokeball open a couple hours later on the route and doesn't comment on it being a Chimchar.

Come on out!” Out came my newly-caught Starly and it immediately dived straight for me.
I always appreciate newly caught Pokémon not immediately being ok with being captured.

The Sun was slowly disappearing behind the horizon
This is probably just an autocorrect typo since you had been capitalising it earlier, but it's a bit funny.

Was it tradition to have a clingy girl always following him around?
.... How many other clingy girls following you around do you have, Cygnus?

This was a nice introductory chapter, though knowing that this is a Nuzlocke fic, there is always a small sense of looming dread and wondering when things will go wrong, so the fact that things go... Surprisingly well kinda helps in building it up a little bit more.
(Well, except for the implied dead...)
There were a couple scenes in the fic that I felt were strangely skipped or could use a bit more fleshing out, like the very first time Cygnus opens Sun's Poké Ball. It's supposed to be a monumental moment in his life after all!
Other scenes worked quite well, like the passing encounter with Cyrus (totally not waiting to see what mess with time and space he made *this time*, since for now my theory is that the deathloop thing is kinda his fault, even as just a side effects of messing with Dialga/Palkia).
I like the dynamic that Cygnus has with his rival, Terra; she's not the kind of rival like Blue or Silver where they are more enemies than rivals, but she also isn't too friendly like Hau or Barry.
She has the right balance of being a friend (and possible love interest judging by Cygnus's reaction) but also still being someone you want to actively surpass.
Even if I'm a bit disappointed she didn't pick Turtwig, so in the future they could be Terra & Torterra and even have names to match

I figured poor guy was going to lose the instant Piplup came out and he was stuck Taunting it to bring the Bubble barrage lol
At least once the starters evolve their typings should make things more even.
If they make it that far...
I'll definitely come back to read more!
 

Nekodatta

Pokémon Trainer
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. koraidon-apex
  2. miraidon-ultimate
  3. skitty
  4. dodrio
  5. litleo
  6. murkrow
Here to catch up for Week 2!
Terra was my rival, that was plain and clear. We were supposed to be angry and mean to each other, and every time we talked, it should be with jabs and insults meant to drive ourselves further!
And totally not have a crush on each other!

“Now, I know you had a little trouble with getting that flame on.” Sun looked a little somber at the reminder. “Which is why I've come up with a plan! First, we're gonna try increasing your body temperature through rigorous exercise! Having a higher heat point should make it easier for you to let that fire out. So, go run some laps and get some sweat on ya. Once you're done, we can try and see if that'll help.”
Ooh I like that, that's a cool idea! I always find it really cool when training is shown as.... Actual training instead of just "ok use Tackle against that tree!"


He inhaled deeply, his tail flame flaring hotter and bigger as he… spat out a small spark. The little thing barely crackled before it fell, leaving the grass completely unaffected.
Poor Sun. That must feel bad.

Come on, this isn't anywhere near as strong as Terra’s…

“Again!” I shouted, frowning.

Another dud. Did it get smaller this time? How was that even possible?
Noo, he's hopefully not going to start resenting his Pokémon now if they can't learn a move...

She struck.

“–Ly!”

And cried out in pain as her unprotected wing struck the tree with a painful sound.
Noo, not poor Klick too!

I sat upright, glaring at the two. “Haha, real funny, guys.”

The two of them must've found my expression hilarious as they only laughed harder.
.... Ok, at least thankfully he took it well.

My eyes wandered around the place as I pondered about things to buy, absentmindedly tapping the pencil against the table. I mean, I don't really need more pens, I already have a whole bundle of them… but you can never go wrong with more.
As someone obsessed with stationery that then sits around never being used: mood.

Racehl was wearing a different outfit from yesterday,
Typo!

My order was simple, a plate of steaming fried rice with sweet and sour chicken as the side dish.
Man that sounds delicious and now I want some... And it's a small thing, but I like that you gave Sinnoh small references to Japan like with the food here.

What waa next? Was Terra gonna jump me from out of nowhere and waste my night again? I had better things to do than hanging out with her.
Typo!

The little girl was crying, completely unresponsive as the person, Rachel tried to console her with little success.
I think there's supposed to be another comma after Rachel.
"as the person, Rachel, tried to console her".

Rache jolted in surprise, looking up at me. “Cygnus?” She bit her lip and shook her head. “Terra and I found her like this… apparently someone stole her Pokémon.”
ooooh wait is this supposed to be the first Galactic encounter in Jubilife but "in the background"?

It was a long time ago but I still remembered the day it happened. When my mom came back home, she tried to hide it. But even when I was six, I noticed. Her eyes didn't shine as bright as they used to, her smile was fragile, forced, and her movements dragged like every waking day was a living nightmare. She was unconsolable at times and–
Did his mom also get her Pokémon stolen? I kind of remember the player character's mom having a.... Buneary I think? And there was no mention of it in chapter 1 at all...

My smile widened when I saw her flipping through the pages. Her gaze lingered a few seconds longer on certain pages. Likely, seeing the silly little illustrations I'd drawn from years bygone. This notebook was something I'd spent years going over, the amount of effort and research I went through, it hurt a little to part away with something I'd poured my heart into but at the same time, seeing the genuine awe on her face made it all worth it.
Awww this was so cute and so thoughtful from him!!

He turned around, scoffing. “A kid? That's who found me?” His hand reached into his pockets to pull out… a cyan wig? “Run away, brat. I don't have time to deal with someone like you.”
I like that the dude's immediate reaction after getting busted is "welp, time to pull out the Team mandated wig, it's protocol"
I also like the detail that it actually is a wig. Probably helps in not being easily recognizable if everyone dresses and looks the same!

“Enough!” The man growled, cursing out as he unclipped another pokéball, ignoring his downed Budew. “Useless! Can't even finish off a damn beginner! Fine! You asked for this, kid. Scyther! Quick Attack and take out that Chimchar!”
.... I see that Cyrus in this universe has read the "Evil Overlord List" and made sure to not send mooks that are coincidentally of an appropriate treath level for the hero.
No, but really, that's a really good "reality ensues" moment. Of course a guy wouldn't just have a Budew and Zubat

I was hearing things, muffled, looping and in the distance. There were sirens, there was screaming. The world was blurring, the shining red and blue lights coalescing and dimming.
This is.... the same as the prologue, interesting. So was it a flash forward or did he die in the exact same way twice??
Well,things sure didn't take long to go really, really wrong. I like that the first "Nuzlocke moment" was not something like a random critical hit in a trainer battle but a big reality check of what happens when a random kid that's become a trainer literally yesterday tries to play hero and stop a thief. Felt really "grounded". Another thing I found interesting was Sun and Klick's inability to learn moves, which I was wondering if it would get build upon but then, well... not sure we'll get answer to that now lol

A cheery, happy song that held fond memories of a time that was a bit less lonely.

I steeled myself, looking at my backpack hanging on the railing. I should get going. I was going to be late. But at the same time, my feet stay rooted to the floor.

Her smile came into my mind. “...next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”
Aww, he remembered this time!

Her glare was sharp and livid but deep down, I knew it was because she didn't want me to lose my chances of receiving a regional starter.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't lol

And that was the fact that my starter wasn't my life partner, Sun the Chimchar.

But instead a Torchic.
.... So this is a *randomized* timeloop Nuzlocke, lmao
But also nooo, what happened to Sun??? :(

Naturally, I mustered every tiny bit of training and knowledge I'd accrued over the past decade to prevail in this crisis.

“Aaaah! Get off me get off me get off me!” I struggled, I screamed, I panicked, waving my arms around like a maniac as I tried desperately to make it let go.
This gave me a good chuckle.

while I knew that recently caught Pokémon couldn't escape on their own until the four hour gracing period was over, I couldn't exactly quell the anxiety simmering in me.
This confused me a bit, what exactly does it mean? So for the first hours a Pokémon can't literally get away from their Poke Ball even if they want to? But after four hours they can leave if they decide they don't want to stay with that trainer?

“... kids these days have too much respect for their elders.”

Isn't that… a good… thing?
It definitely feels like way more things have been "randomized" other than simply Pokémon...

Her voice drew me back into reality. I shook the cobwebs out of my head and turned my head. What I saw froze me in complete shock.

There, in front of Charlotte, was a small green Pokémon standing on all fours. Using vines that came from its neck, it dragged a garbage bag full of junk, smartly having used another vine to tie it up to prevent the trash from spilling.

“A-a Chikorita?” I sputtered.

She has a Chikorita?
I feel like the scene is supposed to be a big shock but it left me a bit confused: we didn't know what Daisy was before so is Cygnus "simply" confused at her having a regional starter? (And so... Does that mean Charlotte has now "taken" Terra's place?)
This chapter felt like the actual "start" of the fic because now Cygnus actually remembers his previous... Loop? Let's say loop.
I found it interesting that his first idea would be that he's a psychic that simply had a vision of the future, because it's not honestly something I would have thought, but in the context of the Pokémon world with psychics being a thing it *does* make sense.
I also like that you switch up the "random encounter" with another Route 202 Pokémon at first, a Shinx, but then start throwing other Pokémon in just to drive home that something is really, really *off*.
Cygnus's idea that he "switched timelines" is interesting.
As for me, my current theory at the moment is that the "loops" are Cyrus doing time space black magic fuckery in his attempts to create a new universe, but each one has him getting *something* wrong and just... randomizing stuff.
Him doing that nod in Chapter 1 at Cygnus struck me as odd, it's obvious they have already met because Cygnus found him "familiar", so I wonder if that was Cyrus kinda recognising that he had gotten things "right" this time?
While in a previous loop their meeting had been different?
Also... Team Galactic... Cygnus being the name of a star...
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. growlithe
  6. quilava-fobbie
  7. sneasel-kate
  8. heliolisk-fobbie
  9. axew-irune
Heya, popping my head in to square away the last of my Catnip reviews and tick off another author on my hitlist, though I see that I got rolled your Nuzlocke fic. I admittedly was expecting things to be a giant disaster (for the protagonist) last time, but he apparently dodged a bullet.

Let’s see just how much longer his luck lasts this time:

Chapter 2

Sunlight rained down on the land of Sinnoh, drowning it in its warmth and brilliance, indiscriminate and imposing. Unfortunately, that meant it also found its way through the window and past the tiny speck of distance between the curtains to blast my face with the concentrated warmth of a billion campfires. I covered myself with a groggy groan but the sun had already done its job and it would take a damn near miracle for me to get back to sleep.

Cygnus is waking up late again, isn’t he?

I reluctantly got up and stretched my joints, groaning with the sounds of popping and loosening knots in my back.

Like always it was a struggle for me to get up, my mind foggy from the last remnants of sleep. It was only when I made my way to the bathroom did the memories of last night come back to me.



Terra… [ ]

My eyes hardened into a glare as I made my way over to the bathroom, splashing myself awake.

I kinda wonder if it’d have made sense to articulate a bit more of what Cygnus is remembering here that’s putting him in such a foul mood here, especially for readers who are coming back to this story after a bit of a hiatus.

I tried not to think about her, not her little laugh, not her pretty amber eyes, not her–

Ah! Stop it! Weird thoughts, get out of my head. In my desperation, I banged my head against the sink, glaring into the mirror.

Ah yes, someone has a crush there~

Terra was my rival, that was plain and clear. We were supposed to be angry and mean to each other, and every time we talked, it should be with jabs and insults meant to drive ourselves further!

Someone is a bit genre-blind to how rivals have worked for the majority of the past 20 years in Pokémon, I see.

The mirror reflected my green eyes, lighting up with a fierce flame. Clearly, my reflection agreed with what I was talking about from how it nodded at my thoughts.

I get the feeling that this would look significantly sillier to Cygnus if someone recorded this and played things back to him. Since I’ve kinda gotten that vibe from his attempts to try live up to his fantasies of what an up-and-coming trainer outght to be.

That's right! We weren't supposed to be friendly with each other and hold-holding hands–

*Ahem*

So the day started like any other day, and ignoring the crawling warmth on my cheeks, I cooled myself off in the shower.

I snerked. Though I suppose that we’ll find out just how strict of a Nuzlocke novelization this story is, since… uh… yeah, if it is one, Sun’s kinda busy being dead right about now.

After getting dressed, I left my room and went to get breakfast for me and my team. I was so incredibly lucky that there were still rooms vacant in the pokécenter. Usually, at the start of a League season, there wouldn't be enough rooms to accommodate the sudden wave of new trainers, especially in a city as big as Jubilife.

Just filing that one away for how training culture tends to work in this story.

While I didn't plan on staying in the city for long, it was still so much better to live in someplace free instead of renting out a motel or something. My monthly stipend could only handle so many expenses.

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Cygnus gets a monthly stipend as a trainer? From whom? His mother?

Potential financial issues aside, the free food from the center’s cafe was also surprisingly good. The waffles and pancakes were amazing, they even had nutritional pokéchow for my team, each specifically made to bring out their fullest potential and improve their health… or something. I sorta tuned out the canteen lady because of how hungry I was. Though, I should head back and ask her where I could purchase some chow for my team. Nutrition’s like a super important thing Pokémon needed to become truly strong after all.

Ah yes, Pokékibble makes its return here. I do wonder that if this Pokécenter is going to be a recurring location in future chapters, if it’d have made sense to expand on describing its general appearance and layout a bit more. Otherwise if it’s a bit old hat, giving some implicit comparison to the Pokécenters that Cygnus has experience going to before this.

After I was done with breakfast and noting down the advice the canteen lady happily provided. I made my way over to the stadium. Last night, I went over my notes on the few training tips I could gather in the center’s miniature library and jotted down what potential things I should train.

Wait, wait, wait. They have a stadium here? Just how big is this Pokécenter here?
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Ember for Sun was an obvious choice. The battle with Terra showed me that I needed a range option. Melee was good and all but it wasn't good enough if the opponent could just knock Sun out before he got close, and while I could circumvent that issue by training Sun to be faster in closing the distance... There were going to be times where Sun just couldn't reach his opponent. Case in point, Psychic and Flying-types.

Oh, so Sun’s still alive. Probably. Maybe.

And speaking of Flying-types, I decided that Wing Attack was perfect for Klick. It was a simple and easy choice, and I already wrote down several ideas for how to incorporate it into her fighting style. Starly also learned the move naturally so it’d be pretty easy for her to get it going. Once she mastered it, it would lead nicely into Aerial Ace.

My eyes wandered around the stadium as I arrived, there were a couple of trainers around already. Though aside from a couple of brief glances, none of them gave me any trouble as they continued on with their training. I shook my head to gather myself when I saw a few of them currently battling. No time for distractions, it was time for training.

Yeeeeeah, that would be wise given that you kinda crashed and burned during your first trainer battle just the other day.

I found a nice secluded place with a big open field near the outskirts of the stadium where there were only one or two trainers around. Putting my backpack down, I sent out my team, receiving determined and happy cries in return.

I kinda wonder if “stadium” here would’ve worked better as something like “battlefield”, since I kinda get the vibe that this is basically a room with bleachers on the side set up, which I admittedly wouldn’t have associated with “stadium” since that implies a level of scale that’s quite a bit beyond that.

With a smile plastered on my face, I crouched down and relayed my plans. “Alright, Sun. Here's the deal. We're gonna be teaching you how to use Ember.”

“Char.” He nodded with a serious look.

how-are-you-not-dead-how-are-you-alive.gif


Though wait, was it ever described when Cygnus either let Sun our or that Sun was out and about with him? Since I don’t remember that happening up to this point.

“Now, I know you had a little trouble with getting that flame on.” Sun looked a little somber at the reminder. “Which is why I've come up with a plan! First, we're gonna try increasing your body temperature through rigorous exercise!

[ ]

Having a higher heat point should make it easier for you to let that fire out. So, go run some laps and get some sweat on ya. Once you're done, we can try and see if that'll help.”

I kinda feel like Cygnus’ line here is long enough that it probably should be split into two smaller ones. Also, let’s check in on how Sun’s reacting right now:

Sun:
bunny-huh.gif


“Chimchar.” Sun nodded and proceeded to run laps.

Well, he sure took that one better than I expected.

[ ]

“As for you.” I pointed at my Starly who mockingly saluted me. “Wing Attack will be a nice basic move to teach you. It'll help you segue into Aerial Ace when you become faster. Though I'm not too sure how we'll be teaching you that but I'm sure it'll come easy to you.

[ ]

We'll start with simple flight manoeuvres, try and see if you can weave around the trees without slowing down, that might help you get a feel of that Flying-type energy.”

Once again, Cygnus’ paragraph feels long enough that it probably should be divided into two with sometihing in between. Also, I kinda feel like you need a bit more of a segue into this going from Cygnus focusing on Sun to him focusing on Klick there.

Klick let out a smug chirp as if to say something like that was far beneath her before she took off.

Oh yeah, that’s a good sign for how things are going to go with your team in this chapter, Cygnus. /s

I looked back at my Chimchar, keeping track of how many laps he ran. After the tenth lap and seeing him panting slightly, I called him back. [ ]

Alright. How do you feel? Do you feel the burn? The fire?”

“Chim… char…” His flame burned brighter in response.

Maybe it’s just a stylistic thing on my part, but I think that it might have been worth expanding a bit on describing what Cygnus notices of sizing Sun up here a bit more.

I grinned. “Well, give it a shot. Look within yourself and set that grass on fire!”

He inhaled deeply, his tail flame flaring hotter and bigger as he… spat out a small spark. The little thing barely crackled before it fell, leaving the grass completely unaffected.

Yeeeeeah, I don’t think that brilliant plan of yours worked there, Cygnus. The fact that Sun’s showing signs of exhaustion probably isn’t helping.

The grin on my face wobbled at the sight and I took a deep breath. “Alright, again!”

Another spark, this time it fizzled away before it even touched the grass.

Cygnus:
jim-carrey-ohcome-on.gif

Sun: “*Gee buddy, if you have such an issue with how i’m doing, you’re welcome to spit up your own Embers for a while.” >_>;

Come on, this isn't anywhere near as strong as Terra’s…

“Again!” I shouted, frowning.

Another dud. Did it get smaller this time? How was that even possible?

Because you wore Sun out and now he’s practicing on fumes right now? Like you do realize that there’s probably thousands of other trainers that wrote blogs about what worked for them for their training and what didn’t, right Cygnus?

“Again!”

794.png


Another fail. Another. Then again and again and…

My frustration was mounting with each attempt. My fists clenched as I snarled in irritation. How was I supposed to beat her if Sun couldn't even learn something this basic?

By pacing yourself and trying something different when your current strategy is clearly not working out? Though I suppose this does feel pretty “10-year-old surprised that real life is not like his cartoons”.

A growl tore out of my throat. “Come on, buddy. How hard is it to use Ember? You're a Fire-type! This should be easy for you!”

“Chim char chim!” He talked back, sending a tired but angry glare my way.

I scoffed. “I bet Klick could do her own move first try!” Cupping my mouth and shouting, “Hey Klick!”

Boy it sure is a good thing that Lucas isn’t here to see how Cygnus is doing with training his Chimchar right now, since I’m pretty sure this is the point where he’d just grab the Pokéball back and lay into Cygnus. :copyka:

Almost as soon as I finished speaking, Klick came flying in, a confused look on her face.

“Why don't you try using Wing Attack on that tree over there? Someone doesn’t believe that you can do it first try.”

Klick gasped dramatically, bringing a wing to her chest and harrumphing. “Starly. Star!”

Oh yeah, that’s a totally healthy way of managing a team there that won’t have negative side effects at all there. /s

My frown stretched into a grin. She looked so certain of herself. “Yeah, that's right! Let's go, Wing Attack that tree!”

She flew over, head held high and hovering just a few inches away. With a powerful battlecry, she raised her wing, her body glowing. “Staaaar–”

She struck.

“–Ly!”

And cried out in pain as her unprotected wing struck the tree with a painful sound.

Wow. That blew up in Cygnus’ face faster than I expected there. Good job, Cygnus. :copyka:

Oh no…

“Oh no no no.” I ran over to her, my legs practically skipping over as I looked all over her. “Please don't tell me I… craap, I didn't think this would happen…”

I glanced around, eyes darting left and right. Where was my bag? Where was it? I needed a potion, a berry, something to help her.

Cygnus, aren’t you right outside a Pokécenter right now? Is there a reason why you’re not just rushing Klick back to the front desk at the moment?

In the corner of my eyes, I saw it. Sun was lifting my bag but before I could react, he launched it at me, smacking me in the face.

“Oof!”

I fell over with a groan. My hands pushing it off of me. It didn't really hurt but I just laid there, drowning under my team’s laughter. It was a prank and I fell for it.

Ah yes, the joys of training someone else’s Pokémon with 0 badges in action.

I sat upright, glaring at the two. “Haha, real funny, guys.”

The two of them must've found my expression hilarious as they only laughed harder. I tried to stay mad at them, I really did but it was hard to stifle the shaking of my shoulders. “You two really did a number on me, huh?” I chuckled and that was the droplet that burst the dam as I let myself go, joining in all the laughing.

It felt oddly satisfying, uplifting in a way that I wasn't used to. The tension in my shoulders loosened up as I let out a tired sigh.

Cygnus: “So, uh… you can actually do your moves and that was all just messing with me, right?” ^^;

I really was acting like a stuck-up, huh?

Nah, it was a bit worse than that, Cygnus. Though I suppose self-awareness is an important step forward.

The loss against Terra must've been hitting me a lot harder than I thought. Ugh, it was just so irritating. Here I was struggling and trying so hard to beat her but like always, she took me on without worry like I was just a small stepping stone in her journey.

Which if it wasn’t for the fact that this story has a bunch of death loops in it, would’ve probably been the case, just saying.

I felt two bodies nuzzling up against me, their soft warmth breaking me away from my self-deprecating thoughts. It was a comfortable feeling, soothing and warm. A small smile wormed up my face as I turned to face them.

Thanks, guys.”

The two chirped at me as I patted their heads. “I'm sorry about yelling at you, Sun. I guess I was just frustrated and I let that loss get to my head. It's just… a little tiring, y’know? Terra’s perfect, she’s smart, strong, has friends... She never second guesses herself and she always knows what to do. And I'm just… me, boring ‘ol weak Cygnus.”

I kinda wonder given how Cygnus mentions that this has been getting to him, if it should’ve been more of his active thought process during the whole training sequence where he’s internally comparing himself to Terra and how Terra wouldn’t have the problems that he’s having or something like that.

“Chimchar chim.” Sun looked up at me, his eyes shining with determination.

“Star Starly!” Klick chirped loudly, her wing pointing at my chest and back to her own.

Even without words, I knew what they were saying. We were in this together. I stood up with a vigorous bounce, a bright grin on my face. “Alright then! Why don't we try something else for a change? You two up to fight some trainers?”

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvdf5n-zI14


They nodded, letting out excited cries.

“Then let's do this!”

de7.png


The morning made way for noon as I walked down the streets, hands occupied with jotting down ideas and plans for my future. I made a decent bit of cash from my short bout of battling though no luck in learning the moves I wanted. I figured I should head to the local library or Trainer School to brush up on my foundations. I must be missing something if neither Sun nor Klick could figure out their own typings.

Wow, Cygnus actually won a trainer battle there. I kinda woner if it’d have made sense to pick up on the tail end of one of these to both show what it was like and the shot of confidence in Cygnus’ mind so that way things were a bit less “informed attribute” but that’s just me.

My stomach rumbled, derailing my thoughts and reminding me why I was out here in the first place. I closed my notebook, shoving it into my bag as I looked around. People were starting to trickle in, it wouldn't be a surprise if the streets became flooded soon.

And while Sinnoh wasn't a particularly hot region, the afternoon sun was scorching. Must be a world record with how hot it was. I hastened my pace. I did not want to spend half an hour standing in the blazing heat. No, thank you.

I’ll take it that that’s a sign that it’s summer right now, since i’ll admit that I wouldn’t have reflexively assumed that it’d get that hot given that Sinnoh in the games seems to play up how cold it is a bit more.

Luckily, I managed to find a nice roomy restaurant that sold both Pokémon food and regular food. The restaurant was quiet and cosy, calm blue decor, clean and organised in a way that pleased the mind, it was a nice lull before lunch hour would undoubtedly drive it into insanity.

Okay, not that this sequence in general isn’t basically a fast forward to get Cygnus to where he needs to be, but I do wonder if things are a bit too hazily described here in the absence of some sort of comparative description.

I placed my order, taking one of the booth seats by the corner. It was surprisingly comfy, a lot more than what I expected from a place that looked like it got a maximum of thirty customers a day. Taking out my notebook, I laid it out, exposing my plans and shopping list to the world. There was the usual stuff: pokéballs, potions, y’know things the average trainer needed. Of course, there were other necessities but aside from food, my mom pretty much bought anything I needed. She was really adamant about me having a good sleeping bag to match with the tent I got from Terra as a gift.

Hm… maybe I should get more notebooks, this one is pretty filled already…

Have you considered a computer/phone/Pokétch to just take all the notes you wanted electronically?

My eyes wandered around the place as I pondered about things to buy, absentmindedly tapping the pencil against the table. I mean, I don't really need more pens, I already have a whole bundle of them… but you can never go wrong with more.

Yeeeah, that monthly stipend isn’t going to last long. Assuming that Cygnus lives long enough for it to become relevant anyways.

People were starting to fill the place; a tired man walked in, looking dead to the world, a couple was holding hands and chatting, and a pink-haired kid was dragging her grandma to the counter.

Larry, is that you? /s

[ ]


I should also get some treats for my team. They deserve it for putting up with someone like me.

I think that you’re missing a section for Cygnus’ thoughs to segue from people-watching and back to his team here.

“Hey,” a familiar voice said, snapping me out of my notes. “Mind if I sit here?”

I looked up with surprise. A familiar blonde was leaning against the seat. Rachel was wearing a different outfit from yesterday, her black shirt swapped out for a red shirt with fire patterns stretching to her sleeves. She was wearing an orange skirt this time that reached down to her shins, still keeping that leather jacket draped over her shoulders. There was a cocky smirk on her face, her eyes gleaming with a confidence that I could never achieve.

Well, not with that attitude you won’t, Cygnus.

Rachel? Is… is she talking to me? No, that's ridiculous. We barely said anything to each other. Why would she–

She snapped her fingers. “You alive there, Cygnie?”

Cygnus: “Okay, yeah, she’s talking to me. Uh… hi?”
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I gasped in shocked embarrassment, dropping my pencil as warmth flooded my cheeks. “It-it’s Cygnus, n-not…” I shook my head. “Terra’s the one that came up with that weird nickname. Yo-you can just call me Cygnus.”

[ ]

Damn it, Terra. She must've put Rachel up to this.

Kinda feel like there’s something here for Cygnus’ mood/thoughts that would’ve been worth showing off, even if I’m having a little trouble on putting my finger down on specifics at the moment.

She nodded, shrugging. “It's fine if I sit, right? The place’s packed and I don't know about you but I don't exactly like being stranded under the sun surrounded by a bunch of hungry and sweaty folks. Like honestly, it's like the sun’s trying for a new record or something. Must be like forty degrees out there.”

Okay, yeah, it’s summer right now.

“Ye-yeah, you’d think Moltres’s doing a fly-by or something,” I joked, chuckling nervously as I gestured for her to sit.

Gah, stop stuttering! You're acting like a fool in front of such a mature and composed gal!

Isn’t that basically just a day ending in ‘y’ for you, Cygnus? :V

Like, just look at that posture! The way she held her head high, the way her blue eyes travelled in quick and meaningful strokes, and how her short hair managed to capture that feral look without being too wild. She was practically radiating confidence and coolness. I wouldn't be surprised if she had a couple badges already, she looked old enough to have gotten at least two or three!

Already getting another crush like two days into your journey, huh, Cygnus? We’ll at least see if you’re more honest to yourself about this one than you were with Terra… assuming you live long enough, anyways.

Hah! Yeah, could you imagine if it was some weirdo summoning Groudon to turn up the heater or some crap?” Rachel giggled, leaning back and practically sinking into her seat. Letting out a sigh of relief, she leaned down, massaging her right leg. “Man, my leg's been such a pain. I got a cramp a few days ago and it's still killing me even now. Can't even do more than half an hour of strenuous activity before it acts up.”

That… actually happened in the background of their setting, didn’t it? Since that’s basically just the plot to Pokémon Ruby. :copyka:

[ ]

“Oh, huh, really? I uh, never would've guessed…” I trailed off, unsure of what to say but I didn't want to end it on an awkward note. “I don't exactly do a… uh, lot of exercise so I guess I wouldn't understand what that's like.”

She snorted as if hearing a funny joke.

Realisation shot me in the neck as an embarrassed warmth crept to my cheeks. I just implied I was a shut-in loser, didn't I? Damn it! I wanted to bash my head into the table so much right now but that would accomplish the exact opposite of what I wanted.

Well, someone is prone to catastrophizing there. Though I suppose that really is a sign that Cygnus has a budding crush given how sensitive he’s being to how Rachel sees him.

An amused smile crossed her face. “Well, here's some advice from an expert. If you ever feel like you're about to reach your limit, take a good fifteen minute break before resuming your exercise. Taking breaks in between rigorous training is essential for a healthy mind and body.”

Which also applies to your Pokémon too, Cygnus. Just saying.

I blinked. That was genuinely helpful. I'd expected a laugh, a joke at my expense, not this. My mouth opened but no words came out and I shut it so fast that I doubted she noticed. I didn't know what to say or how to navigate this or anything. Terra and Lucas were like the only people who had ever helped me with stuff.

Should I say thanks? Or a witty remark? I should at least say something instead of staring at her like a weirdo. But the thought of doing even that was making my heart beat, anxious of what she would say at such a sublime response.

Cue the “Cygnie, why are you staring at me like that?
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Though I see that someone didn’t have the dots come together here. A bit of a shame, but based on the CWs, it probably wouldn’t have helped much given that this latest iteration of Cygnus’ adventure sounds like it’s tracking for an abrupt end.

Thankfully, before I could spiral even further into a nervous wreck, my order came just in the nick of time, saving my bum from burning in awkward silence.

My order was simple, a plate of steaming fried rice with sweet and sour chicken as the side dish. The scent was absolutely amazing and the herbal tea complimented it so well. While I wouldn't verbally admit it, lest she teased me about it, Terra’s recommendations hadn't led me astray so far.

I took another bite, the food practically melting in my mouth. Ah, this was the life.

Cygnus, you can admit that you like Terra already, just saying.

“Woah, are these all yours?”

My veins turned cold and my eyes darted to her. Rachel was looking through my notes, her eyes widened in surprise. Crap, I forgot all about them.

Cygnus: “Uh… maybe? Why do you ask?”
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My mouth flapped opened uselessly, my mind firing off in an attempt to salvage the situation, to say or do something that wouldn't let her know I was a loser that just knew a lot of random Pokémon trivia–

“Approximate stages of when a Pokémon will learn a specific move, detailed lists of what they can do and what they can learn, comprehensive facts and–” Rachel coughed and shook her head, a small blush on her face as she gathered up all the notes and passed them to me with a sheepish chuckle. “Sorry, I got ahead of myself there. Got a bit curious and couldn't hold myself back. Really sorry about that, I know how protective people can get about their notes and uh–”

“It's… fine. I don't really mind.” I said, taking my notes back with a nervous smile.

Cygnus: “Ugh, I wish there was just a hole for me to just crawl into and die in at this rate.”
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Rachel let out a sigh of relief. “Okay, good.” She patted her chest before throwing me a couple finger guns. “But seriously though, those are some incredibly detailed notes though. I don't think I've ever seen half of what you've written or at least not so neatly. You must've put in a lot of effort in researching this stuff, huh?”

Cygnus: “Wait, you… liked them?” O///O
Rachel: “Well, yeah. How many 10 year-olds have thought through their journey this much? Seems like once you get the hang of things, you’ll have a smooth road ahead of you.”

I pushed the blush down, trying to keep cool from how genuine her compliments sounded. “It's… it's not that big a deal, really.” The chuckle that came out was uncertain and awkward. “I just volunteer for Professor Rowan a bunch of times and things just sorta stuck, y’know. Anyone could do what I did if they wanted to. I'm not… special…”

Not like Terra.

That's where you're wrong. You are special, just not for reasons that you’ll like once the story just bluntly throws it out there.

The thought gripped my brain but I didn't let it fester, instead taking in a deep breath and letting the emotions recede. I did it fast and never once showed a hint of what I felt on my face, settling my expression into a neutral look with practiced ease.

He’s looking like he’s obviously panicking right now, isn’t he? Since just saying, Cygnus hasn’t exactly been a reliable narrator up to this point in the story.

Rachel’s smile froze for a second, tugging downward before she shook her head, the grin still plastered on her features. “Ah, that's right. Terra did say something like that.” She thumbed her chin in thought. [ ]

“Honestly, you're not quite what I expected. I would've thought being the professor’s assistants would make you guys act a little… stuck-up, y’know. Being tied to a big shot like Professor Rowan and all that. Makes a girl a tad happy to know that isn't the case with all of you.”

I chewed on her words along with my meal. She's met other assistants before? Well, I guessed it made sense. Lucas and I weren't the first, and I never did bother to ask Lucas about any of the previous helpers.

I actually wonder if Rachel was referring to Lucas. Since I’ll admit that I wouldn’t have pegged Lucas as being ‘stuck-up’, but I suppose that these things are kinda subjective. I do wonder if there’s enough going on in Rachel’s dialogue that it makes sense to divide it up into two smaller paragraphs, though.

“So how did the two of you meet?” I blinked at that and she clarified further. “Terra, I mean, you two seemed pretty close. And based on her words, you two made quite the team together.”

The food went down my throat in a sharp inhale and I slammed my hands on the table. “Whatever she’s been saying about me is false, you got that! I did not blow up that classroom nor set that schoolyard on fire!”

She blinked, caught off guard by the sudden outburst. Recovering with a smirk, a glimmer sparkled in her eyes. “Oh hoh, What's this about blowing stuff up? Do tell, Mr Cygnus.”

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I can already tell this is going to be one hell of a noodle incident.

I froze up, realising I said too much and recoiled back into my seat, a mortified blush on my face. “Nothing happened!” I squeaked out at her amused giggles.

Taking a moment to breathe, I coughed into my hand, crossing my arms and looking away with a huff. “Terra and I aren't close, by the way. Like I'd ever become friends with that loudmouth. She just constantly drags me around, forces me to do stuff that would cut into my studying time and has like no respect for personal space. We're rivals, got that? Not besties, not super duper terrific best buds or whatever adjectives she likes to use to describe our relationship. We're not friends, and certainly not close.”

Rachel:
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Cygnus: “We aren’t, okay?!”
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Rachel blinked with an incredulous look and then she had the gall to laugh, acting like my conviction was the funniest joke she'd ever heard.

I grumbled, my lips tugging into a frown as I stabbed another piece of my meal. The one time I talk to someone and this is what I get.

Yeah, I figured that Rachel wouldn’t have bought that. :mewlulz:

The waiter finally arrived with both hers and my team’s orders. I let them out and after they gave a brief glance to Rachel, they immediately began to gorge themselves like there was no tomorrow.

I chuckled at the sight. “No one’s gonna take your food, y’know. You guys can slow down and enjoy it.”

“Starm lymm!” Klick poked her head out of her bowl, food in her mouth. She pointed a wing at my nearly empty plate and gave me a look.

I’m pretty sure that that meant “look who’s talking”, just saying.

My cheeks stretched into a sheepish grin. “Well, I… I just eat fast, okay? It's different.”

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Klick scoffed and went back to her meal with the same vigour as Sun looked up to shake his head at me. [ ]

“Don’t look at me like that! I don't see you slowing down either.” I scowled, watching as my Chimchar proceeded to slowly and deliberately eat his food like he was covered in molasses.

Just mentally noting that Cygnus’ Pokémon have some trolling tendencies to them. Even if I do wonder if there should’ve been a bit more of a segue into Cygnus paying attention to Sun there.

A sigh escaped my lips but the smile on my face belied my supposed ire.

“So you two really did get your starters from the professor, huh?”

I froze at the question, turning my head back to her. She had her head propped on a hand, her bright blue eyes now dimmed with an emotion that was difficult to describe. She was picking at her food with a fork, her body slumped in on itself like she was reminiscing on something but the look on her face suggested it wasn't a pleasant memory.

Was it something I said?

Oh boy, there’s a story behind this one. :copyka:

An uncomfortable, tense silence swept over us with only the occasional background chatter sliding in to prevent it from becoming too unbearable. I picked away at the scraps on my plate, struggling to think of something to say. Why was talking so hard?

Desperate to break the ice, I spoke up. “Well, yeah… uh how about your team, Rachel? What's your starter like?” I internally screamed at myself at how stupid those words were. She was already showing distress at my starter, why the heck did I think asking about hers would be better?

Quick, I had to think of something!

Cygnus, I’m pretty sure this is the point where you should stop running your gums and try to feel out why Rachel’s in such a bad mood about the topic of starters given out by Professors instead of continuing to talk.

I coughed, rubbing the nape of my neck. “Ahem, I… uh, I'm sure… someone like you must have an awesome team. You're what? A year or two older than me? I bet you even have tons of badges to show off.”

To her credit, she took the topic change with plenty of grace. Her confident stance returning as she answered though a bit more stiff like she wasn't quite used to speaking about this, “More or less. I started off with my Ralts and–”

“You have a Ralts?” She hesitated a nod. [ ] “Can you show me? I've never seen one in person before!”

I feel like it probably would’ve been worth expanding Cygnus’ thought process / reaction there to play up the “wait what, her starter was a Ralts?!”-ness of everything here. Like I kinda got the impression that’s what Cygnus’ mood is supposed to be right now, but it’s not really communicated in the narration at the moment.

Whether compelled by my genuine glee or perturbed by it, she made a move for her pokéball before pausing. “Actually, if you wanna get a peek of her, why don't you do me a little favour first?”

“I'll do anything!” I wasn't letting this opportunity slip by me. Being able to analyse and see a Psychic-type at work would be incredible! And if I was able to convince Rachel to show me some moves… it could be a huge benefit to me as well!

She snorted. [ ]

Anything, you say?”

That… feels like there’s going to be a catch to this, just saying.

A chill went down my spine. That smile. It reminded me way too much of Terra when she spotted prime blackmail material.

I looked around frantically, looking for an escape but every single outlet was blocked by people!

Curse you, lunch hour!

Alright, guess we’re going to find out what that ‘anything’ is in short order.

I didn't know how I got out of there alive. That was so much worse than anything I'd ever experienced… by Arceus…



Okay, okay, enough being dramatic.

The ‘favour’ was honestly pretty simple, and I think it actually benefited me more than it did Rachel. We exchanged tips and ideas for both training and our teams. She was incredibly insightful. I didn't even know there could be that many different layers in a Pokémon’s nutritional diet. Like, did you know that apparently bird Pokémon like Klick needed a specific type of nutrient to keep their bodies clean and pristine? She even came up with a diet plan for me and my team on the spot.

She was seriously cool.

Cygnus:
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Though her training tips were a bit on the weird side, a lot of them focused on making the moves look flashy and… ambush-y I guess was the correct word for it. She must've been like a sneaky attacker or trickster during battle. While I wasn't planning on relying on tricks, I could appreciate the stylish and cool ways I could potentially use my team’s moves.

Not sure that was the smartest thing to share with a kid who is clearly headstrong and hasn’t figured out a proper rhythm of how this ‘battling’ thing is supposed to work, just saying. ^^;

Of course, I shared some of my ideas and plans too, telling her all sorts of Pokémon-related things, like my battling plans, training, and how to make sure they were all bright and happy.

It was really nice being able to just talk to someone about all of this without being looked at like a weirdo–Terra didn't count.

Just saying, if you got with the times and had Terra as a friendly rival, you’d be a bit less lonely about getting to share off your battling strategies, Cygnus.

Though, by the time we were finished, it was already getting late. I couldn't believe I let time slip by me that fast. Like, how was it even five right now? Sure, we spent a while checking out our Pokémon and sharing notes at the park but really? Four hours?

They were talking about more than just battling notes, weren’t they?

What was next? Was Terra gonna jump me from out of nowhere and waste my night again? I had better things to do than hanging out with her.

Like… uh… wait what was I trying to do again?



Oh right, shopping! It was already getting late so why not? I took out my checklist, looking through the various items I needed and nodded. Alright, time to go grocery shopping.

At night? Like I get that you probably live in a high-trust society, Cygnus, but surely this could wait until the morning when you’re 10, couldn’t it?

Potions, pokéballs, rope, repels and so much more. Getting the items was easy enough with my extensive list, but actually paying for them though? I looked at the massive line of people queuing to get their purchases and sighed.

Why did I think doing this on the second day of the League start was a good idea? I groaned internally, lamenting over my poor life decisions. Should've waited until tomorrow.

That would’ve been another reason to not do shopping at night, just saying. Though those seasonal spikes are something else there.

By the time I checked out and paid, it was already night. I walked down the streets, counting and making sure I didn't miss something. Drat, all that and I still need to get treats. It wasn't a necessity but there'd be something seriously wrong with me if I didn't give my team a gift for dealing with me.

So I then scoured the city for another hour. No, I didn't ask people for directions. How could you tell?

I’m surprised that Cygnus didn’t just go back to the PokéMart, grab some Lemonades off the shelf, and call it a day there.

Sun and Klick looked pleasantly surprised when I brought them there, even more so when I gave them a sample to see what they’d like. Klick loved the spicy ones so I got a batch of them along with a bunch of dry snacks since Sun practically inhaled his treat when he got them.

Wait, wait, wait. Just what treats did Cygnus buy anyways? I assume these are probably Poffins, but it wasn’t ever explicitly stated. (Much less why Cygnus spent an hour poking around Jubilife to try and find them.)

Overall, today was productive. I got some training done, made a new friend (I think?) and did some shopping. I should be good to go, though perhaps I should visit the library as well, cover my bases, that kind of stuff. ‘cause as useful as Rachel’s insight was, it could never go wrong with more knowledge.

Just how late into the night is it anyways? Since admittedly, I have not really heard of many public libraries staying open past around 9PM. But that might just be my American provincialism talking.

The calm night reflected my relaxed thoughts. There weren't a lot of people around as it was getting quite late. There was a family walking their Houndour, talking and chatting with happy faces. There was an old lady being walked around by a teen boy who sounded exasperated by what was no doubt his grandmother’s teasing. And there was the moon high above, shining brightly and full. I could even spot a few stars despite the city’s lights.

Say what you will about Jubilife City, but there was something special about walking down a nearly-empty street with the city’s ambience reduced to a quiet discordant harmony. It was relaxing.

A screech for help shattered the peace like a bullet.

Well, it was a calm and relaxing night there.

I stood there for a second, for two then I burst into a sprint towards the direction of the cry with only a single thought in my head.

I have to help them.

I kinda feel like we should’ve gotten to see the wheels turn in Cygnus’ head a bit more than this. Dunno, something about it just feels very high-level and summarized while showing things actually play out a bit more might have been a bit more interesting to read.

After a few blocks of running, I found them, in a street that was nearly empty with only two people. Under the streetlight, there was a little girl with a pink ponytail, a red ribbon discarded on the ground beside her, along with someone familiar crouching next to her.

The little girl was crying, completely unresponsive as the person, Rachel, tried to console her with little success.

“Rachel? What happened?” I looked down at the girl, my heart wrenching at the sight.

Rachel jolted in surprise, looking up at me. “Cygnus?” She bit her lip and shook her head. “Terra and I found her like this… apparently someone stole her Pokémon.”

Ah yes, I think that I’m beginning to understand how Cygnus is going to wind up dying in this chapter. Since this sounds like a recipe for running into some flavor of Team Galactic, presumably one that has its fangs more openly out.

Stole her… My fists clenched and my body trembled, a sharp breath seething through my teeth. A Pokémon thief…

My eyes lingered on the girl crying before me, she was whimpering, crying out, “Daisy…”

It was happening again. Right in front of me, someone had their friend, their family taken away from them.

‘Again’, huh? A part of me wonders whether or not you should’ve tipped your hand a bit more for the thoughts going on in Cygnus’ head, but might be jumping the gun a bit, so let’s see where things go from here:

It was a long time ago but I still remembered the day it happened. When my mom came back home, she tried to hide it. But even when I was six, I noticed. Her eyes didn't shine as bright as they used to, her smile was fragile, forced, and her movements dragged like every waking day was a living nightmare. She was unconsolable at times and–

I’m honestly surprised that this isn’t coloring Cygnus’ actions as a trainer or else his mother’s feedback for his journey at all. Since if his mother had a Pokémon stolen from her in the past, you’d think that at minimum that it would reflect in a lot of nagging “Cygnus, be careful” and “Cygnus, don’t go off on your own at night” sort of advice precisely to avoid being victimized in the same fashion.

I shook my head. Rachel was informing me that the cops were coming, telling me that I should stay here, that the police could handle it and subsequently, she was trying to console the girl, but it was clear she was lost on what she was doing.

But – I gritted my teeth – by the time they arrived, it would be too late. I knew they'd be.

Look, I know that the saw about “when seconds matter, the police arrive in minutes” has more than a little bit of truth to it, but you are in no position to be running off and playing “good guy with a (living) gun” when your Pokémon couldn’t even attack consistently earlier today, Cygnus”

So with my decision made, I took a deep breath and kneeled down, keeping my voice soft and steady. “Hey, it's gonna be okay.”

She didn't respond but that was fine.

“It’s gonna be okay. Your Pokémon… Daisy, she's going to be fine. Don't you worry about your pretty little head. The police and big sister Rachel, they're all going to do their best to save her.”

Her shaking quelled, not quite gone but she at least didn't look like she'd be blown away by a simple whisper.

I mean, at least he’s not doing anything stupid like running off to play hero… yet. Even if a part of me wonders if there was room to explore Cygnus’ thought process more.

“You're a strong girl. Stronger than even most adults, I'd say. If I were in your shoes, I don't think I would even stop crying until I passed out. I know what losing a friend could do to people… and I don't think even Cynthia could handle having one of her friends gone… ” I chuckled lowly. This was a very familiar situation. I pushed away the painful thoughts and brought out my greatest smile, putting a hand on her head and giving her a comforting pat. “What's your name?

The underlined I think could afford to be expanded and delved into in a bit more detail. Is that similar situation when his mother had his Pokémon stolen from her? Something completely different? Or…?

The little girl sniffled. For a moment, it sounded like she wasn't going to answer but her voice came out, trembling and low. “Charlotte.”

“Charlotte, huh? That's a cute name for a pretty little lady.” I rubbed her head delicately, smoothing out the wild strands of her hair. Her trembling was slowly ceasing. “My name is Cygnus Plein. And yes, it's a pretty ridiculous sounding name. My mom was really fond of the stars, you see.”

Charlotte let out a timid giggle, her head slowly rising to fixate me with big teary eyes.

[ ]

I leaned in, wiping her tears away with a gentle smile on my face. “Hey, you wanna know a little secret?” Her cute little mouth pursed up in a curious expression. “You're looking at the next and greatest champion of the whole world. The future champion of every region ever!”

Wow, Cygnus. Just wow.

Even if I do wonder if this should’ve been played up in earlier sequences for Cygnus’ thought process or something like that.

With a graceful flourish, I performed a bow. “And as future champion of the world, I hereby promise that I'll get your Pokémon back for you, no matter what. Daisy won't be all alone and worried about her trainer for long if I'm on the case!”

Oh, looks like I spoke too soon about Cygnus running off with stupid ideas of being a hero. I can already tell this is going to be directly related to how he dies this chapter.

She sniffled but tears no longer streamed down her cheeks. The girl smiled shyly as she murmured, “Daisy’s not a girl, he's a boy…”

But she didn't pull away as I stood up and shrugged.

“Well, being future champion still means I've a lot to learn. And–” I rummaged through my bag, taking a notebook. This one had a Clefable on the cover, smiling and waving in a cute manner. “–here, consider it a gift from the future champion of the world. In here are the secrets and techniques to all you'll ever need to become a great trainer.”

… Wait, how are Rachel and Terra reacting to this right now? Since I’m pretty sure they were never described giving Cygnus space with Charlotte and I’m sure that at minimum Rachel would not be particularly impressed by Cygnus’ “I’m a future champion” spiel here.

My smile widened when I saw her flipping through the pages. Her gaze lingered a few seconds longer on certain pages. Likely, seeing the silly little illustrations I'd drawn from years bygone. This notebook was something I'd spent years going over, the amount of effort and research I went through, it hurt a little to part away with something I'd poured my heart into but at the same time, seeing the genuine awe on her face made it all worth it.

I pulled away, turning around to see Rachel staring at me with disbelief.

“What?” I asked.

Oh, there they are. I was starting to wonder there.

Rachel: “Dude, seriously?” >:|

My words jerked her out of her trance. “N-nothing. I'm just… surprised,” she said. “I didn't take you for someone good with kids.”

I’m honestly surprised that Rachel didn’t just give Cygnus a bunch of crap there. Though I suppose being 12 gives one a greater tolerance for childish theatrics.

[ ]

“That's not–” I shook away the denial forming on my tongue. I didn't have time to waste. “Rachel, can you stay here and tell me where that thief went?”

She didn't immediately respond, looking a little uncomfortable.

“Rachel?”

She blinked, breathing through her teeth. “I’m sorry but I… I can't stay here, Terra’s–I’m not good at handling these types of situations. I can't deal with kids.”

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Rachel, where is this coming from…?

“You don't have to do anything, Rachel. Just stay here, keep little Charlotte safe and wait for the police to show up. I can't waste any more time standing here. That thief could be anywhere in the city by now!”

Her calm eyes faltered. “But I–”

“Rachel! Just tell me where he ran off to!” I snapped, taking a step forward before pausing. With a deep breath, I briefly glanced behind me, relieved that the little girl was too distracted to hear me.

“Fine! Fine! I saw them running that way, okay?” She pointed with a shaking finger. “Terra… she chased after them and… I'm just worried for her, okay? Someone like her wouldn't know how dangerous being alone in the night can be and she… she might…”

Oh, that’s a great sign for how Terra is doing at the moment /s

She rubbed her arms, her eyes narrowed as if remembering a nasty memory. The cool persona I came to know crumbled for a brief moment, revealing a scared girl worried for her friend’s safety.

The anger fled my body and in came an underlying understanding. She really does care, huh?

I… didn’t realize until just now that Cygnus was supposed to be agitated. I think that would’ve been worth playing up in the narration a bit more as framed from Cygnus’ perspective.

“Rachel,” I said. “Don't worry about her. Terra… she's a lot stronger than you think. If I know her as well as I do, then nobody could ever take her down when she's serious.”

My legs carried me forward and I stepped out of the light. “And even if she couldn't, there's always gonna be someone she could count on. Someone who will always be right behind her.” I chuckled, legs spread apart in a dramatic stance and my arms forming a pose. “After all, I'm gonna become the greatest champion in the world. It wouldn't look good for me if my rival goes down to a petty thief!”

And with that, I was off.

Whelp, time for things to get real here.

I took twists and turns, taking paths through the grossest, shadiest alleys around. But even after a couple of minutes of searching, I still came short of finding that crook. It didn't help that I ran off before remembering to ask for the thief’s appearance and… well, I wasn't that familiar with the city’s layout so I understandably got lost.

But I had to keep going, for that little girl’s sake, for Rachel and… for Terra.

Despite what I said to Rachel, I couldn't say I wasn't a little worried about Terra. I knew how hot-headed and impulsive she could be, and the trouble she constantly attracted.

Look who’s speaking there, buddy.

I turned a corner and after a quick mental debate, sent out my Starly. Having a bird’s eye view would certainly help. “Klick, I need you to help me look around. If you spot any shady men, come down and show me the way, okay?”

She nodded with a serious look before taking off as I continued searching. I just had to find someone acting like a suspicious man, how hard could it be?

That’s… not what you should be worried about here, buddy. .-.

I do think that the underlined would’ve worked better getting to see a bit more of what the mental debate in Cygnus’ mind was.

After ten minutes of unproductive ground searching, Klick came to me with more intel. She guided me through a labyrinth of alleyways, apparently she saw a masked person running in circles around here. I couldn't believe my luck. What kind of thief got lost in a city they lived in?

As I entered the alleyway, I caught a glimpse of the man behind the theft and immediately began the chase. He was trying to shake me off, taking sharp twists and turns but Klick steered me true. Eventually, we reached a dead-end and I saw the man.

It was a guy, a normal plain-looking man. Short, black hair, average height, average features covered by a face mask that didn't hide his identity as well as he thought it did. But he was so average-looking that if it wasn't for his weird astronaut cosplay, it would've been impossible to recognise the man. Though strangely, the guy did look somewhat familiar, like I’d seen someone wearing that outfit before.

Oh, so we are getting a Team Galactic encounter. Uh… yeah, I can already tell that this is going to end terribly. .-.

The man clicked his tongue as he neared the dead end. “Ah.”

I rounded the corner with my Starly, shooting a glare that could melt concrete at the man. “Give it up, thief. Hand over her Pokémon!”

He turned around, scoffing. “A kid? That's who found me?” His hand reached into his pockets to pull out… a cyan wig? “Run away, brat. I don't have time to deal with someone like you.”

I mean, technically, you do, it’s just that it’ll add some stuff to your rap sheet that you presumably don’t really want for what was supposed to be a simple snatch and grab.

Shaking off the confusion, I expanded my second pokéball and threw it down.

“Fine, don't say I didn't warn you.” Donning the new hairdo, the man sent out his own Pokémon: a Budew and a Zubat. “Stun Spore and Bite. Take down that Chimchar!”

“Taunt! Stop that Budew and Klick, push that Zubat away!”

I kinda feel like this is going by really fast here since we don’t even get to see Cygnus properly react to the Galactic Grunt throwing out his Pokémon there.

The Budew took in a breath, its body glowing a sickly yellow but Sun ran at it, raging up a stream of insults. My Starly flew over in the blink of an eye, a white blur slamming into the Zubat and crashing it into a wall. [ ]

The thief groaned. “Fine! Attack! Budew, Poison Sting! Zubat, stop lying around and do something!”

“Sun, dodge it and get close! Klick, keep that Zubat down!”

I probably won’t point out every little thing here in this battle since I get the feeling it’ll suffer from the same general issue throughout, but I feel like the current framing is a bit “action log”-y. Consider showing off some combination of the actual events of the battle playing out in more blow-by-blow fashion and Cygnus’ thought process playing out as things happen.

Also, you presumably want to segue into the Grunt’s reaction a bit more before he snaps back. Like is he taken aback by Cygnus’ initial effective resistance?

Needles launched out of the little bud Pokémon’s body but Sun was quick enough to react, kicking off against the ground and leaping over the needles before using his momentum to strike hard on the Budew. Klick continued her attacks, moving faster and faster as she continuously slammed her body into the Zubat, keeping it from getting up.

Usually, I wouldn't be resorting to unsporting tactics like attacking someone while they were down but criminals didn't deserve such niceties.


The thief gritted his teeth, snarling in visible frustration and shouting out commands.

Honestly, I’m half-expecting him to pull a knife/gun at this rate, since this feels like a very dangerous situation to be in with two base morph Pokémon who were partly flailing and partly messing around during training earlier today.

Budew was down, Sun had it pinned to the ground, slashing it with his claws and making sure it couldn't fight back. Klick kept disappearing from view, becoming nothing but a white blur as she struck the Zubat over and over.

I was doing it. I was winning. I couldn't help the grin as the man snarled. I just had to keep this momentum up then I could get them back for her. “Finish them, guys! We can’t waste any more time on this scum–”

“Enough!” The man growled, cursing out as he unclipped another pokéball, ignoring his downed Budew. “Useless! Can't even finish off a damn beginner! Fine! You asked for this, kid. Scyther! Quick Attack and take out that Chimchar!

Well damn. I can already see where things are going to go from here.

Cygnus: “Wait, what?! Since when do Galactic Grunts get Scy-!

My heart dropped like a stone. A Scyther? How on earth did someone like him have a–I sucked in a gasp. No time to gawk.

“Move away, Sun. To your right!”

My eyes followed the trajectory of the ball as it landed and in a flash of light, a Scyther stood there, its wings buzzed with the sound of a hundred blades. In the second it took for my eyes to process the Pokémon, it was already gone.

Sun couldn't even shout before he fell.

“Sun!” No, no no no, my starter was fine, wasn't he? That red, that… that couldn't be–I shook my head, I had to stay focused, think of something before it was too late. “Klick!”

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I do wonder if there should’ve been a bit more description of Sun seizing up and crumpling over or something, but yeah. There’s our first confirmed kill of the chapter there.

Also, Cygnus is clearly new at this given that he’s not instantly returning Sun to his Pokéball after being seriously hurt, since you’d think that would at least not hurt his odds at surviving getting cut-up here.

Her wings were glowing. Wing Attack? No, I couldn't lose focus. Please, please, please! I fumbled for my pokéball, a potion, anything I could get to turn the tides.

Klick: “*I’m right here you know!*” >v<
Scyther: “*Right, I take it that I’m supposed to kill her, too, huh?*”

Klick went in, wings shining brightly as she fought. The Scyther reached her in an instant, slicing across her chest meanwhile the Zubat used the opportunity presented to recover, hurrying to help with glowing fangs. My Starly, using her new move, parried the slashes but every time she did so, the Zubat bit down on her hard, redirecting her focus to the Poison-type which again allowed the Scyther to sneak in a blow.

It was a terrible sight to witness.

Klick was trying her best, she was trying so so damn hard and I-I couldn't do anything!

I feel like this is once again a bit too high-level. Like I get that this is a dimly lit alley and that you likely have a certain ceiling to how visceral you can get with these moments depending on what you rated any FFN/AO3 ports, but I think something along the lines of “It all happened one after another: the scythe raking across Klick. Her pained, faltering squawk. The feathers swirling where she’d been in the air and the red trail splattering against the ground after the Scyther’s swing as she hit the ground in front of me.

But by the time I fished out a potion, it was already too late.

The world crawled to a standstill, my eyes could fully see it coming, the glowing green scythe, the horror and pain on my Starly’s face, the cruel grin on that criminal’s ugly mug.

I blinked.

And everything went to hell.

Wait, she’s not dead ye-

The scythe came down, cutting through her with little resistance. Blood gushed out of her as my Starly collapsed, laying limply on the ground, her right wing landing uselessly beside her, her once proud expression twisting into one of pain and agony.

latest


Well. Now she’s dead. Or a few seconds away from it, at least.

[ ]

“No…” Tears welled up in my eyes and I ran, tried to run, tried to hold onto my dying Pokémon. My feet stomped into the tarmac, my mind racing a million miles an hour. This couldn't be happening, this couldn't–

… Did he grab Sun there? Since you’d think that it’d be a wee bit hard to grab Klick since that Scyther was standing right over her when he cut through her wing.

My body broke down and everything burned.

I couldn't move, I couldn't lift a muscle, I couldn't think under the overwhelming pain. My eyes narrowed, my vision blurry as I glanced down at the source of the pain. I couldn't hold back the scream.

My-my arm! It was gone, my right arm! There was a lump, revealing cleanly-sliced bones from what remained of my shoulder.

Well damn. Guess this guy doesn’t mind getting murder on his rap sheet for the equivalent of a few hundred bucks of Pokémon. That certainly got brutal in short order.

It hurt it hurt it hurt.

My nerves were on fire, my chest writhed in pain. I couldn't breathe. My lungs felt heavy, my skin raw and stiff.

Everything hurts.

My vision was dimming, my hearing muted. White hot pain laced across my body, melting my arm, my limbs. My mind was scattered, my thoughts were a jumbled mess.

I screamed and screamed and screamed until I could no longer utter a whisper.

Wait, was Cygnus able to hear anything of his attacker during all of this? If so, it might have been worth at least mentioning hearing the thief leaving or something like that.

It was quiet. The warmth leaving my body, the wet slushy feeling of my blood pooling beneath me. My chest felt scorching, a fire so hot I could barely describe it even if my mind didn't feel so numb.

Was this really how it ended?

Yes, though the CWs kinda gave the game away there.

It's cold. It's so cold.

My mind was shivering, despite the heat, despite the intense fire, despite how warm I felt. My body was cold. Numb.

That’s called ‘going into shock’, Cygnus.

Feeling left me first; my arms, my legs, I couldn't feel the cold concrete under me. My breathing slowed. Every gasp was heavy, raspy, and tired, like my lungs were filled with lead. I was so damn exhausted.

But at least it wasn't hot anymore.

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision, shadows coiling just beyond what I could barely make out but close enough that I knew it was lurking, waiting to seize me up like a prized relic.

Help me…

Wow, so Cygnus’ second death (that we know of) manages to be worse than his first one. That’s quite the accomplishment there.

It was so cold. I was scared. Was I going to die?

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Even if I feel like the underlined is a bit “told” at the moment and might have hit harder being articulated more through Cygnus’ thoughts.

“Help…”

It took everything from me to cry out.

No one replied.

No one was there.

I was going to die alone in a cold dark alley.

You’ll come back to life again? Not that you know that right now.
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I'm scared.

I still had so much to live for. My dream, my ambition to be Sinnoh’s next champion, my promise to that little girl.

I don’t wanna die.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Mom… Terra… Rachel…

Somebody help me…

This… is what happened to Terra as well, wasn’t it? Since just saying, if that Galactic Grunt was willing to sic his Scyther on one kid to hold onto some preschooler’s starter…

I was hearing things, muffled, looping and in the distance. There were sirens, there was screaming. The world was blurring, the shining red and blue lights coalescing and dimming.

Oh, now the police decide to show up. Great job there, guys.

I could see… something. Red hair? I felt something grabbing me. Was someone holding me? Were they saying something?

Wetness touched my cheeks and a familiar warmth enveloped me. “Cyg-Cygnus…”

I could barely feel, barely see, barely hear.

But even I knew who was holding me.

Terra…

Well, at least it’s less depressing than knowing that Terra is lying disemboweled beside a dumpster right now.

I smiled, mustering up my final dredges of strength to move my hand and said,

“Heh… so, you're not perfect after all… I'm…gl…”

I wiped her tears.

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And then I slipped…

… slowly and slowly into the darkness…

The last thing I heard were the agonised cries of my frie…

And thus, Lost in Distortions came to an end-

Narrator: “There’s another scene and chapter after this.”

Right, let’s go and see how that next life loop of Cygnus’ is going, huh?

My alarm clock blared with a thunderous roar.

I awoke with a strangled gasp, my only arm instantly moving to grasp at my missing… missing arm?

I could feel it, my fingers, the flesh, the skin. What should’ve been a stump of cut bone and tissues was instead a fully functional and healthy arm. I took off my pyjamas in a daze, the numbing pain and sharp heat was still on my mind as I looked down at my chest and saw…

Nothing.

Not even a blemish or a scar.

Cygnus: “... What the hell? There’s no way that that was a dream… was it?”
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My eyes glanced around, taking note of the familiar layout of the room. A poster of every regional champion hanging on the walls, my messy table littered with scattered notes, books and Pokémon figurines, and my regional starter Pokémon patterned blanket on the floor.

I was in my bed?

How… what happened?

Arceus rewound things back to the start since you have another Nuzlocke attempt to make here.

I dragged myself off my bed, my mind was groggy, still reeling from the experience, the memory, the dream? My eyes wandered, finally settling on my still roaring alarm clock.

Eight thirty.

I'm back home…

My heart skipped a beat. [ ]

This… this can't be…”

I ran down the stairs in a breathless sprint. [ ]

I kinda feel like it’d have been worth elaborating on Cygnus’ thought process a bit more here. Like is he still busy trying to process what on earth happened to him? Is he freaking out again realizing that he’s running late for his starter? Just feels like there’s a few options here that aren’t being taken for some reason.

Alright, I’ll be leaving things off here for now. Once again, the characters were the highlight of the chapter, especially getting to see Cygnus bounce off of Rachel and Terra and his Pokémon along with all the little subtle things that tip off that he’s about to have a bad time. Like seeing him struggling through basic training and yet ready to run off in an instant to go and try and get Charlotte’s stolen Pokémon back basically screamed that things weren’t going to end well, and boy did they ever not end well. The big moment where reality ensues and crashes down on Cygnus’ attempts to be an up-and-coming champion was also suitably brutal, and lived up to exactly what the summary said on the tin once reality ensues and crashes down on Cygnus’ attempts to be an up-and-coming champion. By and large I felt that it was effectively delivered and it plays up the mystery of the time loops and gets us to wonder about what’s going on well, especially since Cygnus is preserving his memories across deaths.

That said, I did have a few bones to pick with this chapter while reading it. One thing that I noticed was that there were parts here and there that I felt needed a bit more detail in its description. Like there were a few moments where I found myself going “wait, where’s this coming from” about different characters’ moods or things being mentioned being present by virtue of them not getting established enough as being things in the narration. I also thought the chapter in general suffered from “telling and not showing”, especially with regards to Cygnus’ thought process that I think would be more interesting to see actually play out more in the narration.

But altogether, I think that it still worked well enough. And it took a bit longer than I was expecting, though there’s that payoff for the creeping feeling of dread that has been building thus far in the story. Like I have some quibbles with some of the specifics of the execution, but I thought that you did a decent job at executing your premise and building off everything you set up in the first chapter, and in a fairly unflinching fashion. I’ll leave it to you to decide what, if any of this feedback you feel is worth editing into this chapter versus keeping in mind for your newer ones, but I hope things were helpful @ShiniGojira , and I’ll be looking forward to crossing paths with your writing again sometime in the hopefully not-too-distant future.
 

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Hello there and thanks for the reviews, peeps!

This sentence feels a bit strange to me, I'm not sure the similarity works. A roar and a howl are two very different sounds in my mind, so if the alark clock is "blaring", it can't also be "roaring" and "howling" at the same time.
I agree with that statement, a roar and a howl are certainly two distinct noises though perhaps there's a reason for the strange sounds?
Will it actually be a regional starter? Feels a bit strange that they just randomly had one of the three laying around without having been claimed already.
Well, if you remember from the games, the Player and Barry pick two starters from a briefcase, leaving just one remaining in it and since Lucas was said to be swinging a briefcase while meeting Cygnus...
Also, I was a bit surprised that the starter actually *was* a Chimchar. Not complaining because Chimchar is nice, but it's not clear if it's also the first time for Cygnus to see what's in the pokeball or if he opened it off screen.
For just having received his first Pokémon and probably dying to know what it is, it feels a bit strange that he just pops the Pokeball open a couple hours later on the route and doesn't comment on it being a Chimchar.
Gotcha, I'll try and make it a bit more clear that it's the second time he opens it.
There were a couple scenes in the fic that I felt were strangely skipped or could use a bit more fleshing out, like the very first time Cygnus opens Sun's Poké Ball. It's supposed to be a monumental moment in his life after all!
There is a reason that scene was... well, I wouldn't say skipped since I do have plans on showing it later on
Man that sounds delicious and now I want some... And it's a small thing, but I like that you gave Sinnoh small references to Japan like with the food here.
*Cough* *Cough* It was totally not because I'm Asian and was eating it at the moment and couldn't think of an american meal to add before remembering that Sinnoh is literally based on a region in Japan so the placeholder meal worked anyway.
Did his mom also get her Pokémon stolen? I kind of remember the player character's mom having a.... Buneary I think? And there was no mention of it in chapter 1 at all...
Clearing this misunderstanding early on. Cygnus is not the Player character nor is he a substitute. Dawn will be a separate character and will appear later on, who by the way, I'm very excited to write about 'cause I have big plans for her.
.... So this is a *randomized* timeloop Nuzlocke, lmao
But also nooo, what happened to Sun??? :(
Not exactly 'randomized', more... modernized I guess? Think romhacks like Radical Red, Inclement Emerald where they put in every Pokémon from every gen in the game.

I sorta may have taken Rad Red's encounter pool and merged it with Renegade Platinum.
This confused me a bit, what exactly does it mean? So for the first hours a Pokémon can't literally get away from their Poke Ball even if they want to? But after four hours they can leave if they decide they don't want to stay with that trainer?
Basically, it's a way to explain why rampaging Pokémon don't immediately pop out of their pokéballs and escape when caught. It always bugged me seeing angry, raging Pokémon in the anime get caught and not able to escape despite several instances showing that Pokémon can and will let themselves out if they want to, ditto for people stealing pokéballs and the Pokémon inside doing nothing.

The four hour time limit might also be because I kinda plan on utilising it for a future scene.
It definitely feels like way more things have been "randomized" other than simply Pokémon...
Clearing another misunderstanding. Only the encounters are randomised. Meaning I roll a dice to see who Cygnus gets in a route.

The humans here and Cygnus' interactions aren't randomised and more about all the things that happened during the city when Cygnus was late. You have to keep in mind that the first loop had Cygnus arriving to Jubilife during sunset, in this loop he's arriving around the afternoon.
I also like that you switch up the "random encounter" with another Route 202 Pokémon at first, a Shinx, but then start throwing other Pokémon in just to drive home that something is really, really *off*.
All of them were funny enough actually random. I guess the dice really wanted to trick the readers as much as I wanted.
As for me, my current theory at the moment is that the "loops" are Cyrus doing time space black magic fuckery in his attempts to create a new universe, but each one has him getting *something* wrong and just... randomizing stuff.
Fun theory. My beta reader thought pretty much the same too.

Replying to Chp 1 for consistency's sake
Ah, so this is a Sinnoh story. I suppose that explains the “Lost in Distortions” title.
Fun fact, this story's prototype title was Crimson Loops, try and guess which region that's supposed to be.
And yet he managed to max out his Crobat’s friendship stat… somehow. :copyka:
Either Crobat's also evil or Stockholm Syndrome
Wait, wait, wait. How old is Cygnus anyways? Since just saying, most schoolkids I can think of would pretty openly cry about getting their dreams smashed like this.
While not yet stated, he recently turned 13.
Is that supposed to be Cygnus’ nickname for Chimchar, there? If so, it probably makes sense to establish in narration before this that that’s what Cygnus was doing and a bit of his thought process behind the name choice.
I mean, the paragraph earlier did call him by name but I guess I'll try to fit more in it.
I feel like we’re not really getting a good enough visualization of how this is playing out, since it feels very high-level and summarized at the moment.
While I have gone back to add a few more descriptions into Chp 1 and 2's battles. I do want to say that there is a reason why the battles are so... summarised. It's supposed to be because Cygnus isn't good at battling yet, and the lack of descriptions and clear action/movement is meant to reflect his ineptitude.
First and foremost was that there were parts of this story that felt a bit underdescribed, and as such, made some moments feel like they transitioned abruptly and others a bit hard to gauge what was going on. I admittedly feel that the depicted battles in the chapter were one of the more affected portions, since they admittedly felt more summarized than “actively unfolding” at times, which I think sucked a bit of the excitement out from watching them unfold.
I think I did fine adding some of your suggestions, so thanks for all the feedback!
I do wonder if you had a bit of a missed opportunity not establishing “yeah, this is a Nuzlocke” at the very end of your opening chapter by something like Cygnus going to the local Pokécenter and getting a nasty shock or else even hinting that something was very wrong, since the ending admittedly felt like it would’ve been right at home in a conventional and more lighthearted story, which felt a little at odds with the opening and the description in the summary.
The 1st draft of Chp 1 was actually going to be combined with Chp 2, but the problem was that it got a bit too long and I thought it'd work better if we didn't immediately have two death scenes that felt similar.

Chp 2
Ah yes, Pokékibble makes its return here. I do wonder that if this Pokécenter is going to be a recurring location in future chapters, if it’d have made sense to expand on describing its general appearance and layout a bit more. Otherwise if it’s a bit old hat, giving some implicit comparison to the Pokécenters that Cygnus has experience going to before this.
I'll try and see if I could work on that description in a future chapter though no promises since I don't think I'm gonna be returning to it all that much.
Wait, wait, wait. They have a stadium here? Just how big is this Pokécenter here?
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Clearing misunderstanding since I think ya just forgot 'cause it's been a while. The stadium's actually the one from the first chapter and it's pretty far from the Pokémon center. I think I might go add that it's somewhere in the centre of Jubilife.
Though wait, was it ever described when Cygnus either let Sun our or that Sun was out and about with him? Since I don’t remember that happening up to this point.
The sentence earlier has Cygnus sending both of them out though I wonder if it's better if I just say their names instead.
Cygnus, aren’t you right outside a Pokécenter right now? Is there a reason why you’re not just rushing Klick back to the front desk at the moment?
Again, not near a Pokécenter but also because Cygnus' a dumb dumb kid that panics way too easily
Wow, Cygnus actually won a trainer battle there. I kinda woner if it’d have made sense to pick up on the tail end of one of these to both show what it was like and the shot of confidence in Cygnus’ mind so that way things were a bit less “informed attribute” but that’s just me.
I did kinda have that on my first draft but it felt a bit too bloated. I'll see if I can atleast add just the end of it though instead of the entire thing initially.
Wait, wait, wait. Just what treats did Cygnus buy anyways? I assume these are probably Poffins, but it wasn’t ever explicitly stated. (Much less why Cygnus spent an hour poking around Jubilife to try and find them.)
Yes, they are poffins. I... kinda didn't realise that I didn't say what they were. Like my original drafts had them but I guess my mind ate them up just like Cygnus' Pokémon.
Honestly, I’m half-expecting him to pull a knife/gun at this rate, since this feels like a very dangerous situation to be in with two base morph Pokémon who were partly flailing and partly messing around during training earlier today.
Well, who needs a weapon when you have a living bug with scythes for hands!
Wait, was Cygnus able to hear anything of his attacker during all of this? If so, it might have been worth at least mentioning hearing the thief leaving or something like that.
Unfortunately, Cygnus is too distracted at the moment by screaming his lungs out. So even if he could, he quite literally can't hear anything...

Also nothing is heard right now because there's kinda a big spoiler if I did let him hear it.
Alright, I’ll be leaving things off here for now. Once again, the characters were the highlight of the chapter, especially getting to see Cygnus bounce off of Rachel and Terra and his Pokémon along with all the little subtle things that tip off that he’s about to have a bad time. Like seeing him struggling through basic training and yet ready to run off in an instant to go and try and get Charlotte’s stolen Pokémon back basically screamed that things weren’t going to end well, and boy did they ever not end well. The big moment where reality ensues and crashes down on Cygnus’ attempts to be an up-and-coming champion was also suitably brutal, and lived up to exactly what the summary said on the tin once reality ensues and crashes down on Cygnus’ attempts to be an up-and-coming champion. By and large I felt that it was effectively delivered and it plays up the mystery of the time loops and gets us to wonder about what’s going on well, especially since Cygnus is preserving his memories across deaths.
Really glad you've enjoyed it! Tbh, I was kinda worried that Cygnus training his team was gonna be a bit rough to read 'cause I honestly had no idea how to properly write a newbie doing stuff for the first time but I'm glad it seemed to have worked out!
That said, I did have a few bones to pick with this chapter while reading it. One thing that I noticed was that there were parts here and there that I felt needed a bit more detail in its description. Like there were a few moments where I found myself going “wait, where’s this coming from” about different characters’ moods or things being mentioned being present by virtue of them not getting established enough as being things in the narration. I also thought the chapter in general suffered from “telling and not showing”, especially with regards to Cygnus’ thought process that I think would be more interesting to see actually play out more in the narration.
Yeah, thanks for the feedback, I'll see if I can implement some of them for this chapter and the later ones!

And yeah! Thanks for stopping by and I'm glad you enjoyed this silly little fic of mine! Have a great day!
 

Blackjack Gabbiani

Merely a collector
Pronouns
Them
Partners
  1. shaymin
  2. dusknoir
Hello! Here for chapter one! Oh that's an interesting premise, redoing your journey over and over again.

Ok, Cyrus's presence early on makes me think that this has to do with remaking the universe because he's displeased with how it keeps turning out, but we'll see as we read on. It also reminds me of how that gate employee describes him in Pokespe where he's absolutely gigantic.

I do have to wonder why Rowan stood around for three hours. His lab isn't very big. He could go back to work while he waits. But why did he not order enough starters for everyone if they reserved their appointment in advance? He would have run out even if Cygnus was there on time.

--oh god I just realized he's named after a constellation and the first person he saw outside was Cyrus. That's going to be REALLY significant isn't it?

Cygnus seems to be more in love with the idea of having a starter than what it actually is, given that he doesn't bother to check what Lucas gives him.

Oh and now he suddenly has a Chimchar, which would have to be the starter. When did he call Sun out and name him?

I like Starly's attitude. Feisty little thing!

Ah, Terra, something that could be seen as a planetary name...I'm very much raising an eyebrow in suspicion of just how much Galactic is involved in everything.

Oh Cygnus, stop living in denial haha

Hm but then the other girl is Rachel...I suppose Rowan and Lucas had their normal names too...

Huh, do we find out what "dual wield" means later? That may be something for the loop.

That "stupid kids with a crush" is portrayed really nicely.

Interesting first chapter! Especially with the knowledge that things will keep happening. It seems like there's a lot of little things that could be setups for later so I'm curious what actually is.
 

Axihdio

Script fics are my thing.
Pronouns
He/Him
Hey there! I'm here for the Catnip. One thing I want to ask is how did Cygnus die in the beginning? Since this is a Nuzlocke fic, how does he die? Does he get killed by a wild Pokemon? Or in the worst case, does he commit katanaless seppuku?

Moving on from that to the actual reivew itself, Cygnus waking up late on the day he is supposed to get his first Pokemon is a nice callback to the first episode of the Pokemon Anime. Unfortunately, just like Ash he ends up being too late to get a starter. Luckily for him, Lucas came in clutch with a spare Chimchar. But I wonder how Lucas got his hands on said Chimchar in the first place? Was it his starter? Did he steal it from the professor without him knowing? Even if he didn't, the professor must have been informed of the existence of the Chimchar right?

Anyways, having the main character and his Pokemon be the aggressors in the tall grass was something I didn't expect at all! This is a really ingenious strategy on Cygnus's part because why wait for the wild Pokemon to come to him and his Pokemon when they can ambush the wild Pokemon by themselves? This also shows that Cygnus is a bit more proactive than other Pokemon trainers in seeking out wild battles instead of waiting to be ambushed by wild Pokemon as most other trainers would. However, I'm not sure how Starly (Klick) immediately became friendly with Sun after the battle but Pokemon logic I guess.

The battle with Terra was pretty cool but when did Terra get her starter? If she got hers on the same day that Cygnus got his, then he's in for some tough competition going forward.(If he somehow manages to avoid dying on the next day which he probably does considering your fic has more chapters coming up.)

In conclusion, I really enjoyed your fic and its unique and interesting premise of being a nuzlocke based fic! Good luck in your writing endeavors!
 

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Hello! Here I am for the replies!

I do have to wonder why Rowan stood around for three hours. His lab isn't very big. He could go back to work while he waits. But why did he not order enough starters for everyone if they reserved their appointment in advance? He would have run out even if Cygnus was there on time.
I think you've misunderstood a couple things here. Professor Rowan explicitly said that he did not have time to waste standing around which sorta implicitly says that he did do other stuff when Cygnus arrived late, that and also the fact that Rowan and Lucas were both surprised when Cygnus did show up.

As for the starters, he did order enough actually, more than enough actually. The reason as to what happened to the leftovers does get explained later on but fyi, this fic is starting from the beginning of Platinum.
Cygnus seems to be more in love with the idea of having a starter than what it actually is, given that he doesn't bother to check what Lucas gives him.
Yeah, guess it still wasn't clear that he did take his starter out and interacted with it off screen. I added an extra paragraph to make it clear that he did bring his Chimchar out.
Huh, do we find out what "dual wield" means later? That may be something for the loop.
The fight did show off how 'duak wiled' is used but I guess I could fit in a more detailed explanation later on.
Hey there! I'm here for the Catnip. One thing I want to ask is how did Cygnus die in the beginning? Since this is a Nuzlocke fic, how does he die? Does he get killed by a wild Pokemon? Or in the worst case, does he commit katanaless seppuku?
🤫. Who knows?🤔
Unfortunately, just like Ash he ends up being too late to get a starter. Luckily for him, Lucas came in clutch with a spare Chimchar. But I wonder how Lucas got his hands on said Chimchar in the first place? Was it his starter? Did he steal it from the professor without him knowing? Even if he didn't, the professor must have been informed of the existence of the Chimchar right?
It's... not anything too extreme lol. Lucas ain't Silver, y'know. But here's an extra bit of info for ya, this fic takes place at the same time Platinum starts.
The battle with Terra was pretty cool but when did Terra get her starter? If she got hers on the same day that Cygnus got his, then he's in for some tough competition going forward.(If he somehow manages to avoid dying on the next day which he probably does considering your fic has more chapters coming up.)
Yes, she got it at the same day. She got it from Rowan as she's said that he was really concerned when Cygnus didn't show up with her to pick up their starter.

And that's all, folks! Thanks for the reviews and I'm glad you enjoyed it! Take care!
 

K_S

Unrepentent Giovanni and Rocket fan
Hi Shin it's been a while. Mind if I poke at this fic, it looks lonesome?

I'll lift up the spoiler tag ehen its done!



Implied Death, Some Swearing

Beta-read by Tango


Everything hurts.

White hot pain laced across my mind, scattering my thoughts and spinning the world around me. My vision dimmed and muted, sounds grew muffled and distant..

Somebody…

My eyes trailed onto the graying world around me.

Please…

I still had so much I wanted to do.

Darkness crawled at the edges of my vision. The shadows writhed, dim reality coiling slowly, slowly, seizing me like a prized relic.

Help…

Ah, I see we are sinking right into that "implied" warning right off the cuff...

My body was trembling but I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel my arms nor my legs. Warmth fled my body a long time ago, leaving the hard and cold concrete to chill me down to my very bones.

I was so tired… so… so…

Someone…

I tried to cry out.

But no one replied.

There were sirens, muffled screams and tears.

Everything felt hollow, empty.

And slowly, slowly…

… my consciousness slipped away into the darkness…



My alarm clock blared with a roar of a thousand howls.

Amen to hating that alarm clock, tho since roaring and howling are basically the same thing, perhaps list something that roars instead of using "howls"

I awoke with a startled yelp, panic gripping my heart as I flailed my arms and legs. Unfortunately, the blanket covering me did an amazing job in trapping trapped my limbs and I performed an excellent tumbled onto the firm wood that was the floor.

a bit wordy... startled is implied in yelp. so i suggested culling startled. The "amazing job" and "i preformed" segments csn be cut and still preserve meaning. Suggested cutting "that was" segment since fslling off the bed ususally leads to hiting the floor say... verses a wall.

“Ow…” I winced, a dull ache pounding my head relentlessly despite the blanket breaking my fall. With a groan, I threw the blanket back onto the bed, rubbing a hand against the bump in my head as I got up. “My head…”

3x heads. And 2x blankets nearly back to back don't know if you wanna fix but it caught my attention.


My mind was still groggy but the pain kept my focus from slipping back into the foggy recesses of sleep. I found myself sitting there on the floor, thoughts still reeling from that… that dream? I mean, what else was there to call that? But that dream felt so vivid, so real in a sense that was hard to describe.

So we're playing the "just a dream" card are we?

I swore I could still feel myself laying there on the cold concrete, a tingly sensation seizing my body and ridding me of feeling anything but fog and numbness. I was pretty sure I also heard something that sounded like crying…

A sharp sting punctured my attempts at remembering and I winced, silencing the alarm clock. But even without that incessant shrill, I couldn't get a grip on anything but the barest of fragments.

I shuddered, feeling cold despite the morning sun shining from my window. Even with only the vaguest of details, I couldn't get over how… real everything felt. Like I was still laying there, cold, alone, dying

Tearing my head away from the dream, I looked around. To my left was a window, and for some stupid reason, I seemed to have left the curtains open, leading to the brilliant sun practically blinding me wherever I turned(31). My bed was messy, my blanket and pillows scattered and strewn about after my panicked wake up(17). The ticking of my alarm clock followed my every motion, the time flashing innocently under my gaze.(17)

So I noticed you seem to like long sentences. There were 3x back-to-back that clocked over 10 words, and I wanted to show some ways to play with it to make it smaller, but hold the same ideas... also 9 my/mes in... three lines... I'll address it here too.

alterations:
Tearing my head away from the dream, I looked around. To my the left.

by dropping around and swapping it to my left you drop the ambiguity of the first sentence and can clip a part of the second line into the first. also dropped the my left. there isn't anyone else in the room so why be that hyper specific?

My was a window, and for some stupid reason, I seemed to have left the curtains were left wide open.

THe second line becomes a description of what happened (window curtains open)

Ung, stupid.

the thrid line, while a dangler, basically gives the emotional umph that the of version had in it's 31 word run on.... also the shortness of it lends to it being brek from the wordiness of the other lines, giving the readers eyes a break...

leading to The brilliant sun practically blinded me wherever I turned(31).

reinforces a aspect of the setting (pain and light) that's a consequence of the second line... again. short.

My bed was a messy, my the blanket and pillows scattered. and strewn about(17). The ticking of my the alarm clock haunted me. It never stopped and the numbers spied from the corner of my eye flashed innocently. unread until I was awake enough to make heads from tales.. under my gaze.(17)

the last bit of the my/smes that I didn't fully cull out.... this is a list. bed state of, blanket pillows panicked, wake up, and alarm clock ticking...

second my can be converted to the, unless there's another bed in the room and risk of confusion. Since POV hasn't mentioned a room mate sib etc... it seems a safe assumption to guess they are flying solo... at least in room status. as strewn indicates scattered I cut out scattered. this helped thin the sentence a little...
the whole last line is... a bit eh. I played with it to make it sound better IMHO. You can of course, take it or leave it. But I felt it held all the ideas but flowered better for being shorter in places and more spliced.

I nixed innocently since numbers kinda arent. Wrong tails used. Ticking and haunted are conveying the same compkaint so i nixed one. And removed a few mys sin e its p.o.v.s room thus they were excessivr. This should thin down a few problem spots.


… Wait.

Wait a second…

I blinked, once, twice. But the number was still the same, still the bright red lights showing–

Oh no. Oh no no no.

It was eight.

Eight freaking thirty.

Oh crap oh crap!

I was late!

So incredibly late!

Do not make white rabbit jokes.. do not...

How? Why did my alarm clock wake me up so late? I thought I'd set it to ring at six! Aaaahh, this was bad. This was really bad.

You think "I had a past life existential crisis per seeing its ending" would cover for the sin of running a little late....

I rushed into the bathroom, speeding through the process of cleaning myself. I didn't have time to waste here, I was late for my starter!

Amidst the panic, a stray thought crept onto my mind. My rival, Terra, must've gotten her starter already. We were talking about this day for the better half of the month, even agreeing to meet up before heading to the lab. If she knew the reason why I wasn't there, she'd never let me live this down.

After combing down the Rattata’s nest that was my shaggy brown hair into something respectable, I put on a simple red T-shirt and a pair of brown trousers… or well, tried to. It was admittedly hard to do so when I was running down the stairs. And like an idiot, I promptly lost my balance and fell straight down.

Thankfully, my back broke my fall.

winces. that injury in the heels of that dream double ouch...

Unfortunately, my back was now in pain.

“Are you okay, dear?” my mom shouted from the kitchen, concerned.

“I'm fine, mom!” I couldn't stop now. Standing back up, I successfully wrestled my leg down my pants and grabbed my bag hanging on the railing.

“Well, come and get breakfast, Cygnus. It's gonna get cold if you–”

“Sorry, Mom!” I shouted back, a hand reaching for the door just a few steps away. “But I gotta go! I'm already late for my starter! Bye, Mom!”

“Cygnus–”

Slamming the door behind me, I sprinted towards my destination. Knowing my mom, she’d find a way to convince me to stay but I needed my starter. I couldn't be late!

The morning air was dry and fresh, luckily we lived somewhere deeper in Sandgem so I didn't have to trudge through sand whenever I decided to go outside. People mingled about in the streets but thankfully as the day was still young, I didn't have a lot of people I had to worry about. “Sorry! Excuse me! Coming through!” I waded through, finding my opportunity to slip past the steady stream of people and into an alleyway.

I lived in Sandgem Town for practically my entire life so I knew the ins and outs of the place, and the fastest routes to reach the lab. I just had to get through this alleyway, past the park, and I'd be at the Pokémon center where–

Something stopped me dead still, my momentum ramming straight into and down onto the ground. I winced at the stinging pain in my nose as I fell right onto my butt. “Ow…”

What hit me? There wasn't supposed to be anyone in this alleyway, not with all the trash and gunk. I got back up, a hand rubbing my sore behind as I gave whoever stood in my way a glare.

The man who stared back with a pinched expression froze me right into my roots. He was tall, taller than the professor by half a head and practically twice my height. My breath hitched. The man looked dead, pale as a corpse. His cheeks were sunken, his eyes surrounded by dark rings like he hadn't slept in weeks. Despite his height, he was a skinny and lanky person, more bone than flesh with how his skin-tight suit stretched into his skin.

The sun cast an ominous shadow over him, and his eyes gleamed like silver under the dim lighting. His glare was intense, harshly fierce like he was inspecting a particularly pesky bug.

While I get he's supposed to be vampire-esk and intimidating, I am a tiny bit confused as to how the sun is casting a shadow... I suppose the ominous lighting made his eyes glint and made his silhouette seem dangerous... but the sun would have little to do with that, wouldn't it?

I took a step back. Who-who was this? Did I just find a ghost? The guy didn't look real. How could a man have bleached blue hair while having skin paler than even Mom? Not to mention the weird outfit like he was trying to cosplay a really weird astronaut.

The man was quiet, unnaturally still like a broken down machine. I could feel my heart racing as the nerves shook my body. “I–I’m sorry, sir,” I stammered out. “I wasn't looking at where I was going and I uh…”

What should I say? What could I say? I didn't even know if he was going to kill me, eat my brain or… or… His glare didn't diminish in its intensity. And it was horrifying how expressionless his face looked, like he actually was a corpse that somehow retained consciousness.

I'm getting mad team galactic Cyrus vibes off of Mr vamp... although seriously p.o.v. is comparing Mr. creep with their mother? That's a bit evil... the poor mom.

After what felt like hours of being examined like a lab rat, he finally nodded, leaving without a word and not a single one of his steps making a sound.

When he got out of my sight, I flopped over and fell onto my knees. My heart was racing, my breaths laboured and heavy. “O-okay, scary ghosts in jumpsuits are a thing now.” I joked, more out of habit than anything humourous. My eyes glanced over to where the man vanished into and I stamped down the part of my mind that was curious about who that was.

Though oddly I couldn't help but feel like there was something familiar about the man. Like I had met him before.

I shook my head. No! I was not going down a spooky alleyway, chasing after a shady skeleton man. That sounded like a horrible idea.

Taking in deep, calming breaths, I let the nerves run through its course before returning to the task at hand. I had to keep going. I still had a starter to get.

A lot slower though. Who knew if there were any more scary jumpsuit ghosts out there.



I… made it.

Professor Rowan’s lab! I reached it!

“Ah…” I panted, pushing open the door. “I'm… I'm here!”

My exhausted shout drew the attention of everyone towards me. The lab assistants chatting to each other, the janitor cleaning in the corner and more notably, Professor Rowan and Lucas turned away from their conversation to look at me, neither of whom bothered to hide their surprise.

My lungs felt like they were on fire as my legs dragged me across the room. I really shouldn't have skipped gym class. Ugh, I regretted everything!

“I'm… I'm not too late, right?”

Rowan and Lucas glanced at one another. The professor’s fuzzy eyebrows furrowed in displeasure or well… It was honestly a little hard to gauge his reaction since his default expression looked like he was always displeased about everything.

Lucas, though, was a lot more expressive. An uncomfortable frown lining his face as he turned. “Well, you are over two hours later than expected.” He forced out a chuckle. “We didn't think you’d even show up.”

"sorry I got abducted by a zombie astronaut after dreaming of dying. Can I get a re-do..." might not fly, but it feels about right... also since you dont show the time before p.o.v. leaves. And you dont express how late it is it makes the gslsctic encounter sound likenit took hours rather than felt like it. That or hw got lost (which makes less sense since he supposedly was taking a short cut, unless this is Leon jr. In the directional sense?) An easy fix wpuld be to just acknowledge how late he was on leaving.. or show the creepy encounter did take hours... or that he got lost. One of the 3 options should clear up the confusion.

“And I did! I’m right here, aren't I?” I panted. “Please please please please tell me you have a starter left!”

Lucas turned to the professor, his eyes asking for help that his mouth was too afraid to voice.

The professor sighed, stepping forward with a stern glare. “You were late.”

Receiving his full attention, I stepped back, feeling the words stuck in my throat. “It-it wasn't on purpose, Professor! I was just so excited to start my journey that I couldn't sleep and–and my alarm clock didn't wake me up even though I was sure I set it and–”

He held up a hand. “I'm sorry, Cygnus. I handed out the last of my starters over an hour ago.”

Wh-what?

“No… this can't be...” I must've heard him wrong. He couldn't be out, he couldn't!

“Cygnus. You were nearly three hours late,” he said, body unmoving like a statue. “Now I understand what it's like to receive your first Pokémon, let alone something as rare as a regional starter and while I could excuse being a bit later than the planned meet up.” He sighed. “I cannot excuse someone for being later than an hour, let alone three. And you should know that I am a very busy man, I don't have time to waste merely standing around.”

I could hardly hear the end of his speech over the raging denials swirling in my head. This couldn't be real. It just couldn't be. All that time spent waiting, all that hard work and effort spent studying to even get a chance at this, all my plans and dreams. All of it was going to waste because I couldn't wake up.

I…

Tears welled up in my eyes but I dropped my head to hide them. Now wasn't the time nor place. I couldn't let them see me like this.

“Yeah… I guess…” I managed to make it not sound like I was about to break apart.

The professor took in a breath, his voice softening, his gruffy expression somehow seeming less gruff. . “Look, boy. I could try asking for another batch but I can't guarantee it'll be here before next week.”

Next week? I hid the grimace behind a sigh. I'd be so far behind but it was better than nothing. Professor Rowan was giving me a chance here.

Its not like he said next year.. sheesh...


I bowed low, a textbook perfect ninety degrees angle and showing my sincerest gratitude to the professor. “Thank you.”

With those quiet words, I took my leave with hurried steps, only slowing down after I was a couple of blocks away from the lab. My vision was blurry with tears but I didn't need to see properly to keep walking.

“Damn it.”

I clenched a fist, the despair quickly turning into rage as I rounded into an alleyway. My feet collided with a piece of trash and that broke down my self-control as I kicked a nearby bin. Nrgh! I was mad, so damn pissed at myself for being such an idiot.

If I hadn't stayed up so late, if I had set my alarm properly, if I hadn't woken up so late! I would've gotten my starter already and beaten my rival to the curb! What was wrong with me? I knew today was gonna be the greatest day of my life and yet–

“Aaaaahhh!”

I didn't know how long I'd spent venting my frustrations on the poor things here. But I was tired and hungry, my stomach protesting my poor decisions as I left the alleyway. I wasn't looking forward to my mom’s scolding but I didn't have a choice. She’d get worse if I spent more time out here without anything to show for.

“...!”

I sighed, dragging my feet into slow and dejected steps. My mom was going to kill me when I got back. I mean, I slammed the door, cut her off and practically just ditched her. And that wasn't even mentioning the fact that I couldn't even get a starter. It took a lot to earn her trust to let me handle things myself again and yet, not even a month had passed and I let her down.

“...ey!”

I groaned. This was gonna suck so much.

“Hey, Cygnus!”

My head perked up. Huh? Did someone just say my name? I looked around, turning my head left and right until I saw him.

Lucas, the professor’s assistant, was running at me. Lugging a briefcase in his hands and waving it recklessly. I opened my mouth to say something but after he nearly hit a nearby pedestrian a second time, I was afraid it would be me next.

He came to a stop, huffing and puffing. For a minute, I let him catch his breath before speaking. “What do you want?”

… that came out harsher than I'd like.

Thankfully, Lucas didn't look offended by my tone or maybe he just didn't notice it, he was clumsy like that. He propped up the briefcase, popping it open. “I just remembered that we had one left, Cygnus. A starter.”

My heart skipped a beat. Was I hearing him right?

“Y-you do?”

B-but I thought they said–no, questioning things might make this second chance disappear. I blinked, letting my gaze settle on the single pokéball inside, glee fluttering in my stomach.

“Yeah.” He took it out and handed it to me. “It might not be what you wanted but–”

“I'll take it!” I snatched the ball off of his hands. This was perfect! I had a starter! I finally had a starter! I was so happy I was bouncing on the soles of my feet, practically squeeing in joy.

Lucas chuckled softly, he was a lot less animated than he usually was but I was too distracted by the fact that I had my starter! “Well, I'm glad you're happy. But make sure to take good care of the little guy, alright?”

“Heh, who do you think I am? Of course I'll take good care of ‘em!” I shuffled my feet, pointing a finger to the sky. “‘cause you're looking at the next biggest thing! You hear me? I'll become one of the best there is! Even better than Cynthia herself!”

“Hah, sure.” His lips lifted slightly as he threw one last glance at the pokéball and he nodded. “Okay, I better head back now. The professor has plans for a big trip later and I'll have to finish some paperwork before we leave.”

“Okay, see ya!” I waved goodbye to the boy. Taking in a breath, I turned my attention back to the ball in my hand, feeling the smooth and hard surface. I couldn't believe it but the weight was real.

I had a starter.

My very own regional starter! Years of blood, sweat and tears put into this very moment!

Hopefully, Mom wouldn't be too mad once she learns about this.



“...and another thing!”

Mom turned around with eyes red with rage, her long brown hair trailing down to her shoulders like a serpent on the hunt.

I wilted under her fierce glare, my face paling further as her lecture continued. I knew she'd be mad but I didn't think she’d somehow stretch it into something that lasted for nearly an hour. At this rate, it’d take me until tomorrow to finally start my journey.

“... now, what do you have to say for yourself?”

“I'm sorry.”

“And?”

“I shouldn't slam doors in a hurry nor should I leave without finishing my food.” Her eyebrow was still raised. “And I should go to sleep early if I have to do something in the morning.”

I get she wants repect of property and time together (and hm to eat) but she is overlooking his lateness pretty hard.. that makes this lecture a bit odd to read...

“Good.” She nodded with a satisfied look. “Now, I hope you're fine with having reheated bacon and pancakes because that's what you'll be having after running off like that.”

I held back a sigh. “Okay, mom.” It wasn't the end of the world but it still felt unfair. It wasn't like I wanted to wake up late.

She tapped me on the shoulder, drawing my attention. Her gaze was soft, fond and comforting.

“Look, sweetie. I know how much you've been looking forward to this day and I'm happy you got your starter.” A gentle smile creased her features. “It’s just… next time, try and stay with me a little longer before running off like that, okay?”

Her eyes shimmered with genuine pride and– Argh, this wasn't fair. I couldn't continue to mope around with the sincerity thrown my way.

“Yeah, okay.” A small but genuine smile graced my face as she led me into the kitchen.



It was just past noon when I found myself looking over the field around me.

Route 202.

I’d been here before; for camping trips, survival training. Heck, I'd even snuck out from time to time with Terra to look at some Pokémon.

But today felt different.

Today, I stood out here as a trainer, alone on a path with only my starter to accompany me.

The pokéball in my hand gleamed under the sun’s rays and I couldn't help but smile. I'd taken a few minutes to familiarise myself with my stater back in my room. Even gave him a fitting name for a partner that was sure to follow me far!

Rearing back my hand, I tossed the ball up and with a loud noise, it popped open with a blinding beam of red.

Sun, my Chimchar, came out with a roar of his name, planting his fists deep into the dirt. He gave his surroundings a quick scan and after finding nothing of note, he turned to me with a puzzled expression. “Char?”

Waaait he left flambe monkey out... in his bedroom? How was thier not a house fire? Or did we miss another stirring lecture about bad life choices and fire saftey before he left?


“Okay, Sun. As the starter of the up and coming future champion of Sinnoh–no the whole world! I am going to train you to be the very best! And that means we'll be spending every moment of our lives getting stronger! And to do so, we must first do what every famous trainer does when they're on a route.” I looked around, a smile stretching my cheeks as I pointed at our first opponent.

Out in the distance, in a clear field of patched dirt, there was a Starly pecking away at the ground.

I turned to Sun and relayed my plan. It was a simple one: hide in the bush and attack. Surely, I couldn't mess up an easy strategy.

My starter let out an affirmative cry, nodding along with my idea as he got into position.

Alright! Let's do this! I watched as Sun snuck up on it, hiding in the tall grass and slowly moving through until–

My Chimchar burst out of the grass and with a swift swing of his arm, slashed glowing claws across the Starly's face.

“Star!” the Starly cried out in pain, reeling away with a large flap of its wings.

It recovered in the air, wings fighting itself but instead of running away. It glared at Sun, eyes filled with a vengeful pride. Charging forward with a battle cry, its body glowed a fierce white, disappearing in a streak of light.

It's fast. I didn't have the chance to react before it struck my Chimchar hard, sending him flying into the dirt. It pressed on, body glowing and not wasting a single second as it readied another Tackle.

“Sun, Scratch it when it gets close!”

Sun got back up, jumping to his feet and claws glowing in a blind swing. The Starly was swifter however, reacting just in time to stop its momentum and flapping its wings to stay out of reach.

I clicked my tongue. Okay, a frontal attack wasn't working. It was just going to play keep away. Need to try something else.

“Leer! Then pin it when it's distracted!”

Sun’s eyes narrowed into slits, a dark shadow crossing his face. The Starly froze, an uncertainty marring the bird's confidence. My starter rushed forwards, lunging high, his arms locking the Starly’s wings and pinning it down.

I didn't hesitate as Sun slammed his head against it. My hand unclipped a free pokéball, throwing it forward as the Starly cried out in pain.

It connected, taking in the bird and letting Sun fall down onto the grass.

Then it shook.

Once. Twice and… yes!

With a ding to signify my success, I finally did it! I got my first capture!

Yes! My first official win as a trainer!

Very ash vibes here... amusing and worrying because shinnoh is.. a very spevial and evil adjacent region for novices (see cynthia for exibitt a-z)

I whooped in joy and excitement, running forward and scooping up my starter by the arms. I twirled him around, spinning and laughing in celebration. “We did it, Sun! The start of our path to victory!”

If every battle went as smoothly as this, nobody would ever call me a loser anymore!

Feels like w a line like tjat theres some history. I'll wait a little before I start asking...

I set my starter down and picked up the ball. Time to make a new friend!

“Come on out!” Out came my newly-caught Starly and it immediately dived straight for me.

I mean... you did surprised shunt him into a golfball sized recepticle mid fight...

A yelp escaped me and I narrowly avoided a peck. I gritted my teeth, bringing my hands up to cover my face when I tripped. Luckily, Sun was quick to respond, subduing the Starly as it continued to fruitlessly peck and scratch me.

“Chimchar!” my starter growled out.

It struggled in my starter's grip, eyes glaring with rage. “Star! Star! Ly!” the Starly shouted, pointing at me with an accusatory talon.

“Char! Chim chim!” he shouted back, tightening his grip.

“Ly! Star!” It stopped attacking, fully committing all of its attention into the argument.

The two shouted at each other back and forth. Their argument grew more and more animated the longer it went. At this point, I already got back on my feet and was no closer to deciphering their speech than when I was on my back.

It eventually died down and Sun said something that managed to calm it down as he let go. He looked a lot more tired than he was after fighting.

I stood there, awkwardly looking down at the pouting Starly. “Uh, mind telling me what that was about?”

Unkess your name is N or youre a chikd of Viridian all youre gunna gwt is charades here...


“Starly!” It puffed out its chest, crossing its wings and looking away with a huff.

“Um… yeah I've no clue what you just said.” I glanced at my starter who sighed and proceeded to mime out their argument.

He took on a boxer’s stance and threw a couple jabs.

“A fight?” He nodded, pointing at the Starly. “It wants to fight? No, something else? Fight something? No…” He pointed at the pokéball in my palm. Um... it wanted to fight my pokéball? No, that definitely wasn't it? But it had something to do with–

“Oh! It didn't want to be caught?”

“Starly!” It flew into my face, chirping loudly with an offended expression. It pointed at the pokéball and gestured to itself.

“You’re okay with being caught? Just not during a fight?” I tilted my head. “So what's the problem exactly?”

“Starly star!”

“Chim chim char.”

The two of them cried out in sync, and I could only stand there and watch as they tried their best to convey their needs.

Okay… This wasn't quite what I had in mind for my first day.



Alright.

As it turned out, the Starly just wanted a fight. That was mainly the reason why she had been standing out in the open to begin with.

And because I interfered in her fight against Sun by catching her, she got super mad at me.

At least that's what I thought. I was still a little unsure despite their attempts at translating but I guess the specifics weren't that important. Especially since I managed to convince her to forgive me in exchange for sending her out to fight a couple of battles.

After a quick little break and pondering, I decided to name my new friend, Klick, after a slang for measuring distances. Because like how Sun and I were going to be the brightest star in the world, Klick and I were going to go far!

Interesting name choice...


Klick certainly lived up to her namesake. She was fast, agile, tough, and a real adrenaline junkie. Even after five battles, she was still raring to go. Currently, I was leading her against a Shinx. It was going surprisingly well, I didn't know what I expected when I threw her against an Electric-type but she was a lot more competent than I initially believed. Even without my commands, she was able to dodge and weave through its electric attacks, striking back at just the perfect moment to minimise the damage taken.

Wonder if we arw going to have some rebellion when she evolves... she seems geared that way.

Up in the sky, her body glowed a sleeker stream of white, and she dived down, practically disappearing with how fast she moved.

Woah! My eyes lost track of her as she struck the Shinx, knocking it out cold. She landed beside me, holding her head high. “That was an awesome Quick Attack! All we need to do is to practice with it some more and nothing will ever hit you again.”

Klick puffed her chest out, letting out a prideful laugh.

“So, do you forgive me now?” I popped the question.

She made a ‘so-so’ motion with her wing but I took what I could get.

“Alright, now I'm gonna switch you out for Sun. I want him to get a little stronger before we head to the city.”

Hopefully, he could learn Ember before we leave for the city. It'd be a real drag if Scratch was the only move Sun had on him.

Agreed.

I retrieved Klick without any problems and sent Sun out, receiving a determined nod from him as we marched onward.

Hours went by with dozens of beaten Pokémon under my belt. Unfortunately, Sun hadn't quite figured out Ember but he somehow managed Taunt. I bit back the frustration, usually a Chimchar would learn Ember before anything else. I heaved a sigh as I made the tough call to start leaving for the city.

Wonder if theres a move ransomizer in play here?

The Sun was slowly disappearing behind the horizon, painting the sky in a wide array of oranges and yellow. The city was slowly creeping into my vision and although it was still relatively bright out, the city was slowly lighting up. People and Pokémon of various sizes and shapes mingled under the evening sun with not a care in the world.

The smell hit my sinuses and I grimaced. Yup, that's Jubilife City for ya. Smoky and crisp with a tinge of charred tarmac. Nothing like the salty and ripe air of Sandgem.

Taking a minute to acclimate to the smell, I reached into my bag to pull out a notebook, flipping it open to reveal a checklist. Top priority, of course, was to go find the Pokémon center and register for the gym circuit. After that, I had to write down and double check the things I had to buy before heading for Oreburgh. Mostly potions, more pokéballs, and other miscellaneous utensils.

Probably need a plan for Roark too. A Starly and a Chimchar weren't the best picks for a Rock-type gym but I was sure I'd figure something out later.

Somewhere brock is feeling very vindicated.

I flipped through the pages, landing on a small list of suitable encounters near Jubilife. A Budew would work swimmingly if I can find one, or maybe I could go the easy route and train up a Bidoof into Bibarel…

I jotted down the beginnings of a plan as I walked down the streets. The scratching of my pencil grounded me from being dragged around by the city’s noise, and it was always a nice feeling writing down my thoughts.

“Ohohoho! Do my eyes deceive me?”

My hands froze and as my mind fully processed the familiar voice, I tried to reign in my reactions, acting like I didn't hear it. My legs carried me onward, my steps hurrying, maybe if I acted natural she wouldn't–

“Ack!”

An arm wrung around my neck, bringing my head close to an annoyingly familiar warmth. “Cygnie, it is you! I was wondering where you've been. Thought ya forgot what day it was when I didn't see you at the professor earlier!”

Ung well i can see where the loser concern comes from. Cue incoming childhood bully at 5 o clock. Literally. It be late.


I shuffled out of her grasp, glaring with as much irritation as I could possibly muster at the grinning redhead. “Terra.”

“Cygnus,” she said, not at all phased as she copied my annoyed tone with that cheeky smirk.

Terra was a girl, an annoying redhead with long straight hair that hung down to the middle of her back. Her face held her signature smirk, infuriatingly smug and joyous. Her outfit today was… cute, a pretty blue dress that complimented her dainty and delicate figure. It could do without the comically large sunhat though, it made her look like she was more ready for a picnic than a journey.

A sigh escaped my lips. “What do you want?”

“Whaaat? Why do I need something from you to check up on my favouritest rival?” Terra tried to wrap her arm around my neck again but I dodged, leaning away as she continued speaking, undeterred by the attempt. “Y’know, I really did think you weren't gonna make it. Like, you even missed out on our meet-up! And that wasn't mentioning how you flaked on our first rival battle too! You know it's tradition to have your first fight be your rival!”

Was it tradition to have a clingy girl always following him around? But… I guess I did promise something like that. I clenched my fist, pointing a finger at her. “Alright, fine! Let's go then!”

She gasped, her smile somehow became even brighter as she suddenly clasped my hand, her eyelashes fluttering. “Great! Come on, I'll even buy you dinner after I win!”

My traitorous heart skipped a beat at the contact and warmth crept onto my cheeks. “Af-after I win!” I shouted, shoving down that weird warm feeling down the recesses of my mind and trying to regain some face.

Ah sonthier relation is "its c9mplicated" gotcha.


“That's the spirit!” She laughed, dragging me by the arm.

I bristled at the contact. “He-hey, I can walk myself!” I tried to pull away but she was a lot stronger than she looked.

“I know.” Her voice was smug and I sputtered out a protest.

In the end, I resigned myself to the ball of energy that was my friend rival. The two of us walked down the streets, hands clasped together as Terra gestured and pointed to the various stores and places around them, talking about how we should check them out after we were done with the battle.

Eventually, we made our way to a stadium of sorts. There were trainers everywhere, some were battling, training, even a few talking about trading but the majority were just chatting and talking about nothing in particular. Though I could somewhat make out important bits and pieces here and there. Battle plans, advice, complimenting each other’s team, most of it generally about how excited they were to finally begin their journey.

I couldn't focus on much on the important parts though when Terra let go of my hand, jumping and waving.

“Yoohoo, Rachel! Over here!”

A blonde girl, she looked a bit older than us, probably a year or so. Though it could also be because of her height, she was a noticeable head taller than me… not that I was jealous of something as stupid as that. My eyes glanced over to Terra, noting that she was still a few inches taller.

Definitely not.


If you by Cy's lies I have a wonderful lakeside property in alola for you for the low low price of 2000 a month....

Rachel looked over to us in surprise before she schooled her expression into a composed smile. She walked on over, her stride as confident and cool as the outfit she wore. A leather jacket draped over a black shirt that showed off her midriff and a pair of short jeans. “Yo, Terra! You back for more?”

“Nope. Not this time. Let me introduce you to my bestest and coolest rival! Cygnus Plein!”

If this is post galactic schenanigans the name is more malicious than anything else. If its during than he's going to be accidentally blamed for a lot.

I flinched when Rachel turned her gaze towards me. Suddenly I was back in school again, remembering how Terra dragged me in front of class to introduce myself, the judging gazes, the cruel gleam in their smiles– Snap out of it! This is different. She's a person that knows nothing about you! Come on, think of a cool introduction!

“Uh… hi.”

The words came out as stiff as the hand I waved at her. The grin I forced on my face was brittle but it sufficed to distract for the utter cringe my thoughts were swimming in.

Aaaaahh! Really? That was the best I could come up with? Seriously? Am I trying to make her think I'm an idiot that doesn't know how to talk? Aaaaaaahhhh...

“Hi to you too, little dude,” she said, completely unaware of my internal struggles. Rachel winked at me, quiet understanding dancing in her blue eyes as if to say she knew what it was like to be dragged by the whirlwind that was Terra.

And speaking of said whirlwind, Terra diverted our attention with a loud clap of her hands. “Alright! Now that we're all acquainted, you mind playing ref for us, Rachel? It's our first rival battle and well, you know how it is.”

Rachel mulled over the question for a bit, shrugging as she said, “Sure, got nothing better to do.”

Mysterious and cool jacket-rocking girl as referee? Now I couldn't afford to lose.

“Awesome!” Terra turned to me, pulling out a pokéball. “Let's go, standard 1v1 ruleset, capiche?”

I nodded as she dragged me to one of the fields. With a quiet staredown, a spark fizzled between our gaze as an unheard agreement was shared between us.

We took our positions as Rachel stood by the field, arm raised.

“Three.”

My fingers hovered over my starter's ball.

“Two.”

Terra grinned, bouncing with untethered energy.

“And begin!”

Rachel swung her arm down, signalling the start of our battle.

I unclipped my pokéball and we tossed out our starters at the same time.

“Let's do this, Sun!”

“Time to drown ‘em, Bubbles!”

My Chimchar slammed his fists on the ground at the same time her Piplup sprung into battle, a determined gleam in both their eyes.

A Piplup. Of course, she'd pick a Piplup. Whatever. Type advantage wouldn't matter if I planned this smartly.

Did i mention that that lake side property is on the banks of denial? The fishing's wonderfull all the coagulation of "the one that got away"...


“Leer!”

“Nuh uh, Growl!” She chuckled, shaking her finger at me. “No debuffs for you!”

I grimaced, one step ahead as usual. Fine, we were at a standstill and she had a bigger advantage over me anyway. “Taunt and then another Leer!”

Sun cocked a grin, mouthing off what I imagined must be the mother of all insults with how red the Piplup’s face was becoming. Bubbles looked absolutely livid and it was a little weird seeing such an unusually aggressive expression on its cutesy face.

“Ooh!” Terra’s smile widened as if she’d received a welcoming surprise. She snapped her fingers, pumping her hands in the air. “Bubbles, try and hold that righteous wrath in, okay? We'll be doing your specialty real soon, Pound!”

“Scratch!”

Sun reared low, claws glowing as Bubbles rushed forwards in a burst of rage, swinging with aggression that belied its cute appearance. My starter struck back, parrying each blow without giving Bubbles an inch.

With an angry shout, Bubbles hastened his swings and Sun responded in earnest. I tried to think of something but aside from telling him to keep Scratching, there wasn't much I could think of as Leer was an easy way to let Sun get overwhelmed.

Terra hollered, mimicking a boxer as she hopped back and forth. “Alright, why don't we kick it up a notch? Bubbles Bubble him!”

aaand he just lost. Lovely attention to details durong the fight but nothing short of arceus stepping in is going to save his hide now....

My breath hitched as I hissed out a curse. It already knew Bubble? Are you kidding me?!

“Jump back to avoid it and then get back in when it stops!”

“Dual wield! Go go, Bubbles! Don't let him get another hit!”

Dual wield? The hell does that even mean?

Sun leapt away, managing to evade the oncoming bubbles. He rushed in, claws glowing but before he could even land a hit, Bubbles struck back with a Pound, knocking him away and continuing its bubbling assault.

Although Sun was quicker on his feet, being able to dodge a majority of Bubbles’ attacks. Bubbles simply did too much damage for him to handle. Each landed hit from Sun resulted in him getting scraped, grazed by either a glowing flipper or an exploding bubble.

I didn't have many options and Leer was too risky with all those bubbles. Sun was getting exhausted, visibly heaving and body shaking. It didn't take long before he made a misstep, and Bubbles didn't even hesitate to punish him, knocking out my starter in an instant.

As Sun fell to the ground, I returned my starter with a grumble. Another loss. I didn't know why I expected things to be different when we got our starters but it seemed like Terra was still several steps ahead of me.

It stung as badly as the rest. I hated this feeling. The bitter taste of defeat lingered on my tongue. But I didn't let myself succumb to it, I couldn't let it get to me. I just had to try harder next time.

“Cygnus’ Chimchar has been defeated. Victory goes to Terra!” Rachel announced, bringing me back to reality.

“And another flawless victory for Terra the Terrific!” Terra shouted, cupping her hands around her mouth. “And the crowd goes wild! Haa! Haa! Woo! That was fun! You’re a lot stronger than I expected.”

She was posing, her Piplup also joined in as well. They moved in sync like they practiced this routine dozens of times before. Knowing her, she probably did.

Terra walked up to me. It wasn't for money, she vehemently despised taking money for a win. But the mischievous grin on her face told me she was scheming something as she held up a hand. “Give me five!”

I stared at her hand and back to her face.

She stared back, unflinching but deep down, I recognised the mischievous glint barely showing in her eyes. Terra was planning something.

For a second our eyes met, her amber gaze meeting my green glare. I'd like to say that I stood my ground, and was as unflinching as she was. But as I stared into those pretty innocent eyes, my composure crumbled and I raised a reluctant hand.

“Got you!”

It was a trap! I couldn't retract my hand in time before she wrapped her hand around it. I stumbled back but she held me steady before planting a fist on my head as I struggled in her grasp.

After what felt like an excruciating hour of embarrassment, she relented with a cheeky grin, hand still clasped on mine.

“Ahem, now what do we say after battling?” She lowered my arm, intertwining her fingers around mine. Her eyes locked onto mine, gleaming under the twilight sky with a mischievous yet kind twinkle. Her pearl white teeth baring in a grin that bore a teasing joy.

She's so close.

Warmth rushed to my cheeks as I pushed that thought away, focusing on anything but the softness around my hand. “Good game?”

My rival beamed, looking satisfied with my answer as she raised her free hand. “Bye Rachel! I'll see you tomorrow!” She turned back to me, dragging me by the arm. “Come on, I know a place that has the absolute bestest curry!”

Before I could protest, my stomach grumbled, stymying the words before they could form as a different type of warmth crept to my cheeks. Resigning myself to the hurricane in human form, I cast one last pleading glance towards Rachel, mouthing silent words of help.

But the cruel blonde only watched with a delighted smile as if this whole thing was a play and I was starring as the unfortunate protagonist.

Well that was quite an introduction to both setting and our set of rivals. Thanks for sharing, i'll be around.
 
Last edited:

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Hello and thanks for stopping by, K_S. I appreciate the review!

bit wordy... startled is implied in yelp. so i suggested culling startled. The "amazing job" and "i preformed" segments csn be cut and still preserve meaning. Suggested cutting "that was" segment since fslling off the bed ususally leads to hiting the floor say... verses a wall.
Thanks for the feedback but the wordiness is more or less intentional, as Cygnus is one rambly kid.
3x heads. And 2x blankets nearly back to back don't know if you wanna fix but it caught my attention.
Oof, guess I missed that in the editing phase. Really thought I'd culled that problem by now.
So I noticed you seem to like long sentences. There were 3x back-to-back that clocked over 10 words, and I wanted to show some ways to play with it to make it smaller, but hold the same ideas... also 9 my/mes in... three lines... I'll address it here too.
Yeah, the 9 my/mes is definitely a problem. First time really writing in 1st person so thx for the eye on the details!
Do not make white rabbit jokes.. do not...
If I had nickel for every time someone mentioned an Alice in Wonderland (if this is what you're talking about) reference, I would have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird because I never actually watched or read AiW.
While I get he's supposed to be vampire-esk and intimidating, I am a tiny bit confused as to how the sun is casting a shadow... I suppose the ominous lighting made his eyes glint and made his silhouette seem dangerous... but the sun would have little to do with that, wouldn't it?
It's presumably 9 o'clock at the time this is happening and they are in an alleyway so um, spooky magic?

On a serious note, it's basically framed from his POV and Cygnus is a pretty dramatic kid so it's more like his imagination instead of anything that'd make sense.
sorry I got abducted by a zombie astronaut after dreaming of dying. Can I get a re-do..." might not fly, but it feels about right... also since you dont show the time before p.o.v. leaves. And you dont express how late it is it makes the gslsctic encounter sound likenit took hours rather than felt like it. That or hw got lost (which makes less sense since he supposedly was taking a short cut, unless this is Leon jr. In the directional sense?) An easy fix wpuld be to just acknowledge how late he was on leaving.. or show the creepy encounter did take hours... or that he got lost. One of the 3 options should clear up the confusion.
Yeah, I initially did have Cygnus think of how late he was when he woke up but it felt a little odd. So for clarity, the whole 'three hours' late thing is because the starter pickup thing was meant to last until 6:30 with an added forty-fifty minutes for the stragglers. Cygnus arrives at the lab at close to 10 o'clock.
get she wants repect of property and time together (and hm to eat) but she is overlooking his lateness pretty hard.. that makes this lecture a bit odd to read...
It is the tail-end of the lecture so a lot of yelling was cut off. I'm not really sure if I wanna add more to this scene tbh so I'll just leave it the same.
If this is post galactic schenanigans the name is more malicious than anything else. If its during than he's going to be accidentally blamed for a lot.
It's the beginning of Platinum if Lucas' presence didn't give it away.
 
Chapter 4: Victim New

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
  4. goomy
Brief Panic Attack

Beta-read by Tango

So there I sat on the bench, completely gobsmacked and mouth imitating a beached Magikarp. I was beyond shocked and why was that?

Well, to properly explain it. We first had to go through what exactly a starter was.

Okay, so starter Pokémon were an intrinsic part of a trainer’s career. You'd have to be living under a rock if you didn't know this. They were the first any trainer would know and bond with. They were your partner, your best friend, your closest companion and the one you'd trusted your very life with.

Many trainers started out with simple Pokémon. Bidoof, Starly, Budew, Shinx, just to name a few. Basically any Pokémon that could be found in your local route just a few meters out of the city or town. They weren't particularly strong but they were easy enough to train and were incredibly reliable in spite of their lack of potential.

There were exceptions, of course. If you were in a place that had a gym and subsequently had the grades for it, you could sign up to receive a Pokémon with a typing matching the local gym’s specialty. It didn't take a genius to realise that having a gym-raised Pokémon who were incredibly disciplined and taught to understand orders made a big difference to one’s budding career. Hundreds of trainers would travel to a city and stay there weeks prior to be the first on the list to receive a starter.

Shaking my head, I brought my attention back onto the scene before me.

There was a young girl, happy, cheery and chatting joyfully with her partner. A hand jabbing and picking up trash with her stick all the while looking nothing like the nervous and grumpy kid from before.

My attention lingered on the two for a minute longer as they wadded through the park. They were cute, the two of them were relaxed, adoring each other’s presence like they'd been best friends for many years.

I really wished I could say my mind was enjoying the sight and the pleasant atmosphere around me.

Instead, I couldn't help but focus on the implications, the thoughts and questions swirling in my head.

How on earth does she have a regional starter? A Johto one at that. How long have they known each other? How does a little kid that barely looks nine have a Pokémon that I, no so many others have, struggled so hard to obtain?

Was it because her Pokémon changed, like how Sun had disappeared? Did it change whatever flower Pokémon she had into a Chikorita? That…

No. I shook my head. That wouldn't work. If Charlotte had a normal Pokémon, it made no sense a criminal would steal from her. A Budew, Oddish or Cherubi would be nowhere near valuable enough to warrant kil–ending my vision, let alone kidnapping a child's pet.

Then what could it be? Was her family loaded? A regional starter was expensive and rare. Practically extinct in the wild and endangered in captivity despite the decades of conservation attempts. Finding one on your journey was practically a miracle.

And that wasn't even mentioning their battling prowess. Like imagine having a Pokémon that was not only incredibly easy to train but also capable of obtaining a huge surge of power early on and maintaining said strength throughout their later years.

By all accounts, since Charlotte had a Chikorita while being nowhere near the age requirements to be a trainer, it should mean that she came from a rich family.

But…

My eyes wandered back to the girl, hefting a bag full of trash over her shoulder, her starter steadying her with his vines when she almost fell over. I looked at her closer, eyes squinting as they roamed her figure.

On first inspection, she wore clothes that didn't look all that far off from a middle-class family. She had one of those cute Clefairy hair bands that tied her ponytail, her orange shirt meshing well with her sky blue skirt in a warm gradient. On her back, was what appeared to be a Silphco brand backpack, and she was wearing a pair of slightly tattered but well-maintained white shoes.

Yet, the longer I stared at her, the more imperfections I began to notice.

On her outfit, I saw stitches, barely perceivable patches where the colours were just a tad shade darker or lighter. Heck, it was still nearly impossible to keep track of them despite my knowing of them now.

Her backpack likewise had the same stitches, in some places they were uneven and noticeable, like an amateur’s first handiwork, and in other spots, it was again very hard to even notice.

How long had she been practicing to get results like that?

I looked down at my own shirt, noting the discoloured string on my shoulders. The stitches on my own clothes were well made, almost professional at first glance and yet, not even Terra could sew things that perfectly blended in with the original fabric.

A nine-year-old with a rich family would have no need to learn how to sew if they could just buy another outrageously expensive outfit.

So, was Daisy a gift? Given to her by a relative? Maybe she had an older sibling that went on a journey and miraculously found or bought one?

I shook my head. No, no, that still didn't make sense. A veteran trainer wouldn't be so irresponsible as to let a little kid run around the city, doing odd jobs with a regional starter. That was just begging for him to be stolen.

Heck, that did happen!

And that wasn't even mentioning the fact that it sounded like her grandmother was taking care of Charlotte… or was it the other way around? The two acted exasperated with one another in the short while I knew them.

I shook my head, getting sidetracked here.

Okay, let's see.

A grandmother needing a cane yet walking around by her lonesome to get heavy groceries, a child working odd jobs despite her age with a Pokémon that many would literally kill for. A child that looked neither rich nor had a relative that gifted it to her.

Hm…

A kid having a Pokémon that could only be obtained through either money, connections… or through an exam roughly five percent of trainers could pass...

That… wait. Why did that sound familiar?

Let's see… I wracked my brain hard, trying to remember just why this situation seemed so familiar to me. Was it something I read online? Why did it feel like I knew something about her that I normally shouldn't–

And then it hit me like a sledgehammer.

Oh.

The realisation settled in my chest as the deepest dredges of my mind dug up the information buried within, and shock filled my veins.

Oh.

A few years ago, a year before Professor Rowan went on that four year long research trip. I saw it online in the Sandgem Library when browsing for Pokémon facts. There was a report. An article of someone, of a five-year-old child who managed to score not just with straight As but with perfect scores on a test meant for trainers like… me. The child’s face and name weren't documented as the family didn't want the attention and I never cared too much about it when nothing came of it a year later.

A dud, I’d thought, rolling my eyes. The news loved overblowing things out of proportions after all.

But now that I was here, sitting and staring at the duo in front of me. That memory struck me silent, my eyes widening and mouth hanging as the revelation rang cold. There was no way Charlotte could be that kid. There was no way she was a–

“H-hey, Cyg-Cygnus?" Her voice was timid and meek.

I blinked and suddenly, she was standing in front of me, poking stick, gloves and plastic bag gone from her hands. She was rubbing her arm as she fidgeted in place, afraid and nervous as if this was the first time she'd really talked to someone. Her Chikorita stood by her side, glaring at me with distrust and his vines barely sprouted from his neck as a warning.

I looked at the girl before me once more. I still couldn't wrap my head around the revelation. This was an actual prodigy, a child prodigy. Someone who was so in tuned with Pokémon that they could take on entire criminal organisations singlehandedly and do what no other champions could.

Jealousy. I felt that ugly prickle of a familiar emotion rise in me. Here was a kid who didn't even have to work half as hard as I did, acing an exam that brought me to tears several times a month for years. A kid that barely stood up to my height had the potential to become a legend like that of Kanto’s Red, Johto’s Ethan and Hoenn’s May…

My hands clenched into shaking fists. I wanted to complain. I wanted to lament and cry about how unfair that was, how someone could be so gifted, be so blessed by life. I wanted to scream and yell about the unfairness of it all.

And yet, despite the revolting emotions writhing beneath my veins…

… all I could see was the teary visage of her pain-stricken face.

Disgust broke through the shackles that my envy created. I felt sick to my stomach, shame quickly took its place, weighing heavily over my heart.

I can't believe I thought about her like that. Not working half as hard as me? She's literally picking up trash in a public park for gods’ sake, she's working odd jobs just to feed herself and her grandma!

My fists clenched tightly as shame berated me.

I, Cygnus Plein, truly was a despicable character.

Mentally shaking off my thoughts, I flashed her a grin even if it didn't reach my eyes. I still had to pretend I wasn't such a selfish loser. “Yeah? What's up?"

Her features creased in unease, her feet shifting under my gaze. "I… I'm all done with my work here… You uh, you can go now. I won't waste any more of your time.”

"Oh? But how are you gonna carry–” I smacked myself. She was gonna do it with her starter, duh. Didn't have to be a genius to figure that out.

Ignoring her confused look, I continued, "Right, right. Your Chikorita’s gonna be helping you with them, correct?”

My question snapped her out of her confusion and her eyes took on a slight edge. "Yeah, and what's it to ya?"

Her tone held that fire that I'd gotten to know, her posture tense and stiff. Her brows narrowed into an unflinching glare, yet there was something about it that looked like she was resigning herself to whatever fate was about to happen to her.

To say I was a little thrown off guard by the sudden shift in attitude was an understatement… and it was a little concerning. What brought this sudden aggression?

Creeping like a Spinarak down my spine, a thought popped up. Was… was that thief not the first time this had happened?

The thought weighed on my mind like a solid ball of lead and then it dropped with a loud thud into my stomach. A little girl, presumably an orphan living in poverty with a rare Pokémon, and in a city as big as Jubilife, the capital of Sinnoh. Was there really any need for an explanation?

My vision had already shown me that crime in Sinnoh wasn't as low as I'd initially thought.

I used to believe that since Sinnoh wasn't a place like Old Kanto or Orre that crime was a distant thought. Plus, living in a peaceful place like Sandgem Town where everybody knew each other, cemented that idea, it was almost unfathomable for me to think of crime. Heck, I couldn't remember a single crime that wasn't just petty theft, and even then those were mostly from Pokémon in marketplaces.

Suddenly, all of the suspicious looks and wary glares made sense. She was distrustful of me, of a rando who just showed up and started treating her like he knew her. My mom always did tell me to be careful whenever we went out… but I never really thought I'd have to watch out for myself in Sinnoh.

I chewed on my lips, bringing a hand to rub the nape of my neck as I glanced down at the girl. “It's…nothing,” I said as my eyes dropped to her Pokémon beside her. "It's not like I don't have a starter of my own. I’ve just… well I've never seen a Chikorita before. He's a lot cuter than on TV."

Charlotte blinked, brows furrowing for a moment before she turned her head up and scoffed. “Well then, take a good long look at him and bask in his cuteness. I can assure you there's nothing on earth that's cuter than my Daisy!”

I chuckled at her prideful expression and crouched down, getting a better look at Daisy. His coat was a fluffy shade of grassy green, his head leaf bright and healthy, and his body a little plump around the waist. He stood tall and proud, with the most ferocious little glare on his face but honestly, it'd just made him even more adorable.

Putting my hand out, I reached out to pet the little guy but he swerved his head away at the last moment. I tried again, moving my hand closer and once more, he dodged it, jumping away and barking at me.

Feisty little guy, eh? Like trainer like starter.

I stood back up with a smile, hand still out from the failed attempts.

“He's cute,” I commented, staring at my hand as a devilish grin formed on my face. “But I could think of one thing that's cuter than a Chikorita…"

I turned around, leaning down slightly as I put my hand on her head and smiling. “And that’s sweet little Charlotte riiight here."

A second passed, then another and another and then ten without a response.

There was a blank look on her face, her eyes bare of emotions and thought.

Oops, I think I broke her.

“Bwah!" No sooner than I finished that thought, she shoved my hands away and leapt back, face as pink as her hair. “Wh-what the hell are you doing? Yo-you can't just say something like that! That's… that’s–"

It started small, light, murmured snickering escaped my lips but seeing her act so flustered, so embarrassed about a little teasing broke me down as I burst out laughing, guffawing with a hand on my stomach.

“The look on your face…” I sputtered out between breaths, body quaking in amusement. "Absolutely priceless!"

Scarlet red. Confused, embarrassed and with a hilariously scandalised expression. It took her a moment to figure out that I was playing with her and her eyes narrowed in anger but that sudden transition from embarrassed kitten to angry puppy only made me laugh harder.

She's even growling! Oh my gosh, that's so adorable–

“Daisy, teach him a lesson!"

Before I could even process her words, something struck my face, blocking my vision. I yelped in surprise, hands quickly rising to take off a… leaf?

Yeah, sure enough. It was a leaf, bright, fresh and weirdly enough, it was glowing a bit.

Huh, odd. Where did this come from–

"Chiko!” Daisy exclaimed, grabbing my attention. The thorns around his neck were glowing brightly. The same shade of white-green as the… glowing leaf in my hand.

Oh. Realisation sank deep within my chest and with it came a sense of dread. Oh crap.

Charlotte smirked, taking in my mounting panic and snapping her fingers. “Leafage."

As those words left her mouth, Daisy attacked. The leaves started small, quick and precise, and striking me at every angle. It stung with every shot, though it wasn't really that bad, just irritating, like getting poked constantly by a thin blunt object.

But it wasn't the pain that was the problem.

Rather it was because there were just so many leaves. Left, right, above. The entire sun was blotted out completely and I could only stare in nervous bewilderment at the sight.

And… yeah, as much as I would like to say that my current predicament was well within my expectations of her… the uh, involuntary shriek that escaped my lips suggested otherwise.

Swallowing down my nerves, I glanced at Charlotte, raising my hands in surrender. “H-hey, let's talk about this. You don't have to do this.”

The smirk on her only widened. “Oh, I have to.” She nodded slowly as she turned to her starter.

"Daisy, bring it down."

And with a loud boosh, the leaves all came crashing down and my world became a massive pile of green.



“Pleh!"

Ah gross. Some of it got in my mouth.

Shivering in disgust, I spat out the leaves, wiping my lips and began to make my way out. But just as I managed to poke my head out, a sudden weight jumped onto my back, keeping me pinned.

"Chikorita!” Daisy exclaimed in triumph, his stubby paws implanting themselves onto my back.

“Awesome work, Daisy! That'll teach him to mess with me!" Charlotte came walking into my view, a hand covering her giggles.

Glancing down at me, she crouched low, her eyes lighting up with a teasing gleam. "Oh, look who managed to worm his way out. What's wrong? Was Daisy’s Leafage too strong for you to handle? Because–" Charlotte giggled. “–I don't think I've ever heard anyone scream that high before.”

Red flared across my cheeks. “That's… that's not. I wasn't–”

"Being a big wuss? Like who even gets scared of a Leafage of all things? And here I thought I would have to initiate phase two to get you to stop.” She snorted, putting her hand under her chin in a thinker pose. "But with how you reacted, maybe I should've had Daisy do a wittle Tackle on you instead? Show a little mercy for the big ‘awesome’ trainer.”

Embarrassed as I might be, I wasn't gonna let my pride be scalded this badly without retaliation. Putting on a haughty tone, I remarked, "Pssh, if this was your idea of a comeback, then I say it's just as adorable an attempt as you are. I've been through way worse when I was a kid than–"

She silenced me with a deathly glare and with a subtle jerk of her head to her Chikorita, she simply demanded, "Daisy.”

"Riri!"

Those were the last words I heard before my world was engulfed in leaves once more.

Lying under the pile of leaves, I blinked. Okay, maybe taunting her wasn't the best idea.

Bleh, some got in my mouth again.

Spitting out the glowing leaves, I waved my arms around, shoving them away and carving a tiny tunnel for me to crawl through.

It didn't take me long to finally poke my head out again but having to trod through what must've been a full five metres of leaves took a bit of a toll on my physically unfit body.

I really regret not joining my mom’s daily run when I could've. I heaved, panting slightly at the strain in my arms.

And to add insult to injury, the leaf pile dissipated into nothingness the moment I got out, leaving me staring blankly at the vanishing foliage.

My eyes followed the fading pile up, noting just how humongous that Leafage must've been. It had likely reached the height of two trees at its peak.

“Someone that cute has no right being this strong,” I murmured. If this was just a warning, how powerful was that little prick if he actually wanted to hurt me?

"What was that?” Charlotte shouted from behind me, her voice promising a fury that knew no bounds.

I startled, jumping in surprise. How long had she been standing there? Turning to her, I raised my hands in a placating gesture. “Nothing! Nothing…"

The girl grumbled, waving her fists in a menacing manner. "It better be nothing ‘cause otherwise you'll regret it."

Her glare only made me chuckle sheepishly. "Right, right, I won't. I promise, I promise. You don't have to worry your pretty little face."

Charlotte harrumphed with a hint of pink in her cheeks and looked away. “Whatever. Come on, Daisy. Let's go home and put these away.”

"Rita!” Daisy nodded, moving on over to the bench where I left the groceries, his vines out. He moved them through the handles, lifting them up and pausing for a moment. Daisy frowned, looking back at his trainer and shaking his head. “Chikorita…”

“What? Seriously, even you can't lift all of them? Just how much did granny buy?" Charlotte groaned, covering her face.

"I knew I should've kept our funds better hidden after she spent half of her share on useless clothes…" she complained, moving to grab her own load. “...already told her I didn't need any new ones when my old clothes still fit but nooo, a genius like me can't walk around in ‘drabs’...”

She sighed, pausing to get a better grip of the bags, head low and her voice barely a tremor. "Like I'd care about what anyone else says about me… If being a genius was supposed to be a good thing, then why did it get mom and dad…"

Though I struggled to make out the exact words. I didn't really need the exact specifics to understand what she was talking about, as it was… something I could relate to.

"Kori,” chirped Daisy, a gentle vine patting her leg.

Life had dealt her a bad hand. My heart clenched and ached, a quiet somber empathy played through my mind. Just the small glimpses I'd gotten of her life tugged at my heartstrings and knowing just what lied ahead in her future, what she would experience in return for her persistence and determination.

I clenched my hands, fists shaking. I was going to make sure that criminal rot in prison for the rest of his life, even if it was the last thing I'd do. That thief was going to pay.

Taking in a long deep breath to calm myself, I plastered a grin onto my face, strolling over to her and getting her attention with a clear of my throat. “Hey, I couldn't help but overhear that you might need some help?”

Charlotte flinched as if remembering that she wasn't alone, stiffening up and taking a step back. “Wh-what are you still doing here?" She glared at me. “Don't you have better things to do than bug me?"

I opened my mouth, about to answer but… she wasn't wrong. I did have better things I needed to do. I needed to reach the library to figure out this psychic vision thing as well as find any leads about the weird changes to the world, and I still needed to prepare myself against that criminal. I had only a single day and a half to prepare, surely there were better ways to spend my time.

Yet, despite knowing that I had a time limit, I couldn't just leave someone in need! Not if I could help it! After all, I had the responsibility as a future champion to do so!

I shrugged. “I can't exactly leave a little girl to fend for herself in the big city, can I? Any aspiring champion should do the bare minimum of helping their citizens!"

"A champion? You?” She snorted, giving me a blank stare. "Don't make me laugh. You couldn't even handle Daisy's Leafage. In what world do you think you can become a champion?"

“Tsk tsk tsk." I wagged a finger at her. “Another non-believer in the making, I see. But don't worry, I'll let it slide if you let me help you."

I reached out a hand to help but Charlotte swerved her arm away. “Yeah, no." She shook her head. “I don't need your nor anybody’s help. I can handle things all fine by myself."

“Really?" I gave her an incredulous stare.

It sure didn't look that way to me. Her injured leg was shaking a bit and while I didn't think she would fall or collapse like she did earlier, her sweaty and slightly strained expression didn't exactly give me the impression that she was gonna be ‘fine’.

I moved my hand again as I spoke. “Regardless if you're fine or not. I couldn't in good conscience let a hurt kid wander around, carrying heavy things when I can help."

“And I told you I'm fine.” She stepped back, just out of my hand’s reach and sucking in a breath. "I've been at this long enough to not let a small injury slow me down.”

Holding up three fingers, I said, “Well, I’m thirteen, a guy and you're a nine-year-old kid, that automatically means I'm obligated to help little girls in need.” She opened her mouth, no doubt about to refuse me again but I seized the momentary distraction to grab a hold of her hand.

Charlotte blinked at the contact, her features twisting into a snarl. “I don't care about your obligation or your ‘help’! I can do this all on my own!" She swivelled on her feet, pulling away from my hand and growling. “Gods, why are you so insistent on this? Is there really nothing interesting for you to do? I thought trainers were supposed to be super excited and be all happy about their ‘big day’ but you're just bugging me instead of focusing on yourself!"

For the first time since I've met her, she looked like she was genuinely angry, her posture was tense and defensive, her voice sounding almost… bitter. Her eyes narrowed as sharp and thin as knives, her body shaky with laboured breaths.

I stayed silent, grimacing away from her eyes as I mulled over her words. She… Was… was I going too far with this? Stopping her from running around…

What she went through that night was not something anyone should experience, let alone an orphan. It was a horrible, festering feeling that crawled under my skin, knowing that I had failed to keep my promise, knowing that I lost when it mattered the most, knowing that I was set to fail no matter what I did–

The taste of copper filled my mouth. The pain of biting my cheek tearing me out of the dark recesses of my mind.

No, that didn't matter right now. I could help her, save Daisy. I had a second chance now, I knew the future, I couldn't just throw this chance away.

My fists clenched in tight resolution and yet and yet, uncertain thoughts still lingered.

Was I going about this right? Was I doing more harm than good here? Like she said, I could spend my time better training my Pokémon, preparing for the worst, prepare for my de–

No no no, I couldn't. I shook my head.

Even if I could ignore this aching need to help. There was… an obstruction in my mind. A mental barrier that pushed me away from the thought.

I didn't know why but just thinking of going out there and training, of… interacting with my team, with… Camp made my blood run with apprehension, made my head spin with sweat, made my throat clam up in dread.

It made me feel like I was replacing Su–

I bit the edges of my tongue. Was I still hung up about that vision? I thought I'd convinced myself that they–that it wasn't real. That I should move on and forget they ever existed.

I swallowed a dry gulp. My eyes headed low, down my body, down my plain red shirt and to the pokéballs on my belt. Volta’s and… I had to force myself to really look at it, at Camp’s pokéball. I hadn't realised it until now, but I'd placed it on the farthest end, still within my peripheral vision but far enough that my eyes would easily gloss over it as part of my clothes.

Was I being unfair to Camp without even realising it?

No. I denied that thought. I shouldn't have–wouldn’t have done such a thing.

I gave him a name, trusted him to have my back when I threw Volta out, and let him lounge on my beanbag back home. I wasn't being unfair about not letting him out when I was searching for Klick. Volta just had better vision than a Torchic, it was simple fact, simple kindergarten textbook fact that made my decision.

Besides, I was pretty sure he enjoyed staying in his pokéball. Whenever I had him out, he always beelined for a soft area to sleep. I wasn't a Pokémon but I read that pokéballs were a really nice and comfortable place to stay in.

Yeah, that's right. Camp loves lazing around anyway, so why would I wanna force him out and bug him with training? I'm just being considerate, that's all.

I nodded at my own reasoning but the creeping guilt still didn't recede.

A glance back at Charlotte showed her having stepped a few meters away but had paused to speak to her Chikorita. From the looks of things, it didn't sound like they were talking about the weather with how angry the two appeared. Were they having an argument because of me?

Gods, I really am the worst, ruining the happiness between two partners and forcing myself in as if I had any business.

If only Terra was the one who had this power, if she could see the future then I was sure she'd know what to do. Instead, this stupid future vision was wasted on an incompetent talentless loser like me.

I gripped my left arm, fingers digging into my skin as I bit my lip. Maybe… maybe I should just excuse myself and leave. Find something, do anything that wasn't out of my league.

As I stepped forward, their argument began to settle down. Charlotte looked frustrated, her brows furrowed in irritation. When she noticed my approach, she froze, her head moving up to look me in the eyes. The frustration vanished, covered up by an unsure nervousness and her fingers started twitching.

She glanced back at Daisy for a brief moment and I took the chance to speak.

“So… I… I'm sorry about the whole ‘trying to help’ thing and I did some thinking and I… well, you're right. I do have things I need to do and I guess, I was trying to hold off on that by being a nuisance. Sorry about being overly pushy, I didn't mean to seem so persistent or annoying, I was just… concerned, y’know.” I rubbed the nape of my neck, playing it cool.

At times like this, it was best to not let others know that there was more going on beneath the act. No need to make others worry about me.

Charlotte blinked as she processed my words and she muttered beneath her breath with an eyeroll, "Isn't everyone?"

She sighed, the words coming out of her with a struggle. “I’m sorry too… I guess. I was being a bit stubborn.”

"Chiko?" Daisy bantered to Charlotte’s heated glare.

“And… um…” she trailed off, twiddling with her fingers. With a heavy breath, she exhaled, her cheeks flushed slightly. "Look, don't take this the wrong way, okay? I might ne… neeeeed your he… help."

Her face looked like she bit into a lime for the first time and absolutely despised it.

I snorted.

“He-hey! Don't laugh! I'm not doing this because I want to! I'm… I'm doing this because of Daisy! And… and my leg’s maybe a bit more injured than I thought! But it's certainly not because of you, got that?” She turned her head away with a harrumph, crossing her arms.

I chortled, feeling the weight on my shoulders lifting just a tad bit.

“Stop it! Stop laughing at me!" she protested, waving her fist threateningly but to no avail. “Grah! Daisy, this is your fault!"

And to add salt to injury, said starter was currently laughing at his partner.

For once, it seemed like the little guy and I had come to an agreement as we laughed our hearts away.



The capital city of Sinnoh was in full bloom. The sounds of Jubilife City bathed the air. Hundreds of voices, Pokémon and human, all hushed in conversations, calls, and vrooms and whooshes from vehicles driving by. People, beginning trainers, little kids and working adults all walked around, all… well actually, saying that everyone was walking would be a bit of a stretch.

Because holy crud, if tomorrow’s crowd resembled raindrops in a storm then today was like a hurricane brought on by Lugia. There were so many people I couldn't even see anything past a blur and smudge of contrasting colours.

Unfortunately, that also meant Daisy, Charlotte and I were basically stuck and subjected to a speed that greatly reminded me of that one video I saw of a Slowpoke Vs Slaking race.

And just like how I’d felt from the torture I'd forced myself into that time, Charlotte was clearly not happy with our current situation with how much she was tapping her foot while trying her best to not look like she was about to scream her heart out.

The flow of the crowded sea came to an abrupt stop. Thankfully, the way parted quite a bit and I could actually see the reason why. The stoplight turned red.

And that was apparently the last straw as Charlotte groaned, smacking her head in indignation. “Oh, come on. Now, it turns red? Really?”

I snorted. “Well, it could've been worse. You're not the one having their hands occupied and tired." I wiggled my arms for emphasis, one holding groceries and the other grasping Charlotte’s hand.

Charlotte scoffed. "Your other hand wouldn't be tired if you didn't force me to hold it. I told you I won't get lost.”

I raised a brow, giving her an incredulous look. "Uh huh. And the first ten minutes after we left the park didn't exist, huh? You literally got swallowed up by the crowd and it took Daisy and I five whole minutes to get to ya."

“That's not–!" Her cheeks flushed before she turned away. “Whatever. I was just distracted earlier, that's all! It's not like I'm bad at directions or anything, I was just… surprised by the crowd. Usually, I'd work a bit longer before getting lunch but granny decided to ruin my schedule… again."

She sighed in exasperation but a hint of fond amusement betrayed her stance and the tiny creasing of her lips told me otherwise.

Shaking my head with a smile at her blatant denial, I turned my head back to the light. Somehow, the darn thing was still red. Urgh, how annoying.

I let out a sigh but didn't let it get to me. The waiting did present another opportunity to gather more information of Charlotte’s situation. If I could figure out why she stayed out late that night, maybe I'd be able to stop the criminal before the theft even happened.

But first, an ice breaker was needed. "So,” I said, setting the foundation gently. “How's school going for you?"

“Huh?" She glanced at me, brows furrowing in confusion. "It's… fine? I guess? I mean it's school. It's not like there's much going on right now, what with the league start. Though it's not like much happens anyway, it's… boring...”

Right, kinda forgot that schools let out early for the beginning days of the league.

The extra time was usually so families got to see off their budding trainers and bid them farewell and good luck on their journeys. It also doubled as an easy way to let younger kids check out all the various cool Pokémon everyone threw into mock battles and spars.

Looking down at Charlotte, I couldn't help but feel like she might've used that extra free time to well… not exactly act like the kid she was.

Yes, I was still on about that. There was just something fundamentally wrong about having a kid constantly work just to take care of her grandmother. Seriously, did nobody care about the literal kid genius?

Shaking my head, I asked, “Well, have you made any friends? Got anyone you're interested in?"

She raised a brow before realisation settled and that confusion turned into disgust as she shuddered. "Ew, gross. Why would I care about any of those brats, let alone have a crush–” Charlotte scrunched up her nose. "Bleh, that's so gross! Why on earth would you ask that?”

Although somewhat depressing, that was another possibility ticked off the list. She wasn't out because she had friends wanting to hang out nor was it because she snuck out for some secret date or something.

I chuckled at her expression. "Just curious, that's all. Can't exactly ask for your grades, can I? I assume you've probably aced them. What with you, y’know, being a geni–”

Her grip tightened around my hand, her body tensed as she sucked in a breath. “Don't call me that," she hissed.

I flinched, jerking back slightly but her iron grip held me still. Her glare was glacial, sharp like the edge of an icicle.

Okay, okay! Topic’s off limits! I get it I get it!

Ouch, her nails were digging into my skin a bit. As the apology bounced on the tip of my tongue, I sa–

The light became green.

–was jerked forward, biting down the words as she dragged me ahead. Her steps were shallow and quick, manoeuvring around the crowd with surprising grace for someone with an injured leg.

I could pull my arm back, stop her from dragging me around. I wasn't a physically strong teen, but Charlotte was a little kid. I wasn't that weak, okay.

Instead I stayed quiet. It was better to let her cool down from whatever landmine I tripped on than to aimlessly run my mouth. My nervous fidgeting with Rachel previously had taught me that much at least.

Charlotte continued moving forward. One minute, two minutes, three minutes of just nonstop running. She let go of my hand once we reached a less populated space, slowing to a halt and catching her breath, panting with her hands on her knees.

Concern began to seep into my mind as I watched her heave for a full minute. Is… is she okay?

Thinking back, it wasn't like we ran that far to exacerbate her injury this badly. Like wasn't her injury just external? There was a bit of swelling and bruising sure but I didn't understand how it could cause her to pant like she'd hiked a mountain.

“Hey." I stepped forward, reaching out a hand to help. “Are you okay?"

“Yeah." She pushed my hand away, still breathing heavily. “I'm fine. Just gotta catch my breath... That's all."

“Right…” Blinking at the casual dismissal, I turned to my side to see Daisy finally catching up, a worried gaze following his steps forward beside me.

“So uh, little guy.” I caught his attention with a cough and he looked at me. "Is there… something up with Charlotte? Why she's so… out of breath?"

The Chikorita grimaced, his vines drooping slightly, dodging my eyes with a guilty whine.

Huh… why is he? I furrowed my brows in thought, eyes slightly widening. Wait, is he the one behind her injury?

His response made me believe it wasn't intentional. Maybe it was some kind of training accident? A misfired move?

But I couldn't think of any moves a Chikorita could learn that would only cause bruising or well, at least at this level. Vine Whip and Razor Leaf weren't exactly blunt, and having him Tackle her just sounded stupid.

“It's nothing!" Charlotte shouted, bouncing back on her feet and giving me a minor heart attack from the abrupt motion. She stared at me, sweat dripping down her chin with her cheeks a little flushed.

"It's… it's nothing, okay?” she said, giving me a nervous smile. "I'm just a little hungry. That's all. Didn't have the time to eat breakfast earlier and… well, also didn't get enough sleep last night… but that's fine. I'm fine… I'm…"

She trailed off, dipping her head low. Her left arm raised to grasp her right, fingers rubbing against it. “I'm… sorry for that. For um, snapping at you again.” Charlotte’s eyes were still on the ground. “People don't exactly speak with the… greatest intentions when they call me that."

The girl’s body was withdrawn, her voice small and fragile. She felt oddly her age for once, this vulnerability that I'd initially gotten used to.

I chewed on my lips.

Yet, this was a different kind of vulnerability, not one of loss nor pain. Instead, it was a familiar one, a deep personal issue that resonated with me deeply.

I let out a breath, a gentle smile on my face. "Too many expectations?”

Her breath hitched and after a moment of hesitation, she grimaced. “Kinda…”

She didn't continue and while I would like to understand her better, I let it go. She could tell me when she was ready.

A bout of silence washed over us as we continued our trek. While she didn't say it, I could feel her gratitude for not prying.

The area we were at was some sort of housing district. Large two storey buildings lined up side-by-side across a large plane of land. It was a well-maintained area with plenty of greenery around and also apparently pretty close to the local trainer school. I could see the massive building that was just a couple blocks away.

As we walked down the less dense streets, Charlotte spoke up, breaking the silence. “Hey, Cygnus.”

"Yeah?” I raised a brow.

"Do you mind if I ask you something?” At my nod, she continued. "You are a trainer, right?"

“Yeah, I–” I paused, stopping in my tracks and giving her a look. “Am I a trainer? What… what the heck is that supposed to mean?”

I wave a hand to my belt. “Do you not see the pokéballs on my belt? The Silphco infi-backpack? I even gave you some ointment, what kind of person walks around with ointment?”

"An eccentric weirdo," she answered without skipping a beat. “Which… y’know, with how you've introduced yourself. I thought you were one of those ‘Pokéfans’.”

I raised a finger to refute her claims. “First of all, I don't dress up in silly costumes all day and night nor do I spend every waking moment adhering to some weird ritual like praying to a Charizard plushie or providing meals to a shrine of figurines.”

Shaking my head at the half-remembered article that resurfaced, I pointed to myself with a thumb and a smirk. “Instead what you're looking at is someone who's spent years working their butt off to become the greatest champion in the world!"

I ended my speech off with a pose; arms raised, bags up high and legs bent slightly.

To my dismay, the awe and shock I was hoping to inspire in my audience turned out to be anything but. If the way her hands were covering her quivering lips and quirked eyes were any giveaway, she was trying her best not to laugh.

At me. Like all the non-believers. And she had the audacity to hide it.

I scoffed. I wasn't hurt but there was just something about having my dreams being laughed at that irked me.

"Laugh all you want,” I said, waving a hand dismissively. “You’re staring at someone who's passed their RS exams with flying colours and got a… a Torchic to boot!"

That got her sobered up real quick, casting a disbelieving stare my way.

“Really? You passed the regional starter trainer exam? The exams that everyone made a fuss about when I aced it as a kid? The exams that apparently only five percent of trainers could pass? Someone like you got straight A’s?” She was staring at me in complete shock, her eyes scanning me up and down as if her worldview was just shattered.

Okay wow, that actually stung.

Whatever.

I shook my head. If she didn't believe me, then I just had to prove myself. Reaching a hand to my belt, I plucked off my starter's pokéball, waving it around with a smug smirk. “Here, you can check him out if you want. Prove that I'm not a liar."

Charlotte’s eyes darted to the ball, and there was a sliver of uncertainty and a dash of apprehension shining in them along with… longing? Her lips parted slightly but she shut them down, left arm raised to grasp the other in clear anxiety.

Before I could even begin to unpack that implications behind her gaze, my pokéball sprung open all on its own, the blue beam of light shooting forward and coalescing above Charlotte’s head, forming the lazy ball of feathers that was Camp.

It took a second for both Charlotte and I to process the sudden action. And in that second, my Torchic nestled himself gently on her head and fell asleep with a soft coo.

Charlotte blinked, hands raised slowly, fingers patting his resting body as if she couldn't believe the sudden weight on her head before she brought her hands down.

“Cygnus?" she said, her voice still and profound, and eyes wide in shock. "Why the heck is he sleeping on me?”

Because he's a lazy bum. Because he always does this. Because he's just like this. I bit back the sigh. Why am I even surprised that he'd do this?

I held back the scowl that was forming, instead trying to put on a more friendly expression as I stepped closer to scold my starter.

“Camp, you can't just sleep on people, that's not–"

Someone bumped into my shoulder hard and I stumbled back with a wince.

"Hey!” I began, turning around to face the man who shouldered me. "Watch where you're… go… ing…"

The words on my tongue shrivelled up and perished as an overwhelming cold took over my body. My legs couldn't move, my mind became blank, my eyes widened, locked on the person before me.

It was a man. A man not much taller than me, a man with dull, disinterested, glazed over brown eyes, a man who all but looked as if he held nothing important in life. His hair was black, devoid of shades and colours, neither unkempt nor groomed to fancy locks. His figure was plain, neither gaunty nor stout, his outfit as bland as his eyes, boring clothes with boring shades of white and gray.

By all means, this person in front of me, was average, painfully ordinary. In any other circumstances, my eyes would gloss over him without a single thought, my mind wouldn't even keep a lick of information about him, all traces of him would be in the background, like a faint tree in a canvas of an open field of flowers.

And yet.

And yet.

I knew him.

And my mind, my memories resurfaced with a scathing blow.

It's him.

The man who wore a cruel smirk as he stood over his downed Pokémon.

It's him.

The man who ordered his Scyther to run down my partners, bathing in their blood like he enjoyed it, like he relished in the pain and deaths.

It's… him…

The man who murdered me in cold blood. The man who left me for dead. The man who left me bleeding all over the concrete.


And with that, the dam broke.

Horror struck me. The numb dreadful feeling of my life slipping away from me. The terror of fading away in a chilling and lonely fashion. The feeling of the cold holding me in its gentle yet painful grasp, caressing me, seizing me from any hope.

My mind gripped my body frozen solid and it screamed, it frothed, it shrieked!

It's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's himit’shimit’shimit’shimit’shimIT’SHIM!

It's him.

Throbbing. Thumping. In my chest. Like a feral beast begging for release. My heart pounded. Quick. Loud. Harsh.

My legs didn't obey me. My arms laid still, fingers quivering, shivering. Fear coursed through my blood and my eyes trained on the man, on his fingers, on his legs, on any subtle twitches that might belie hidden motives.

“Hey." The words came out of him in a drawl, slow, forced as if he had better things to do than speak to the kid he murdered. “Sorry about that. Guess I had some things on my mind… and…"

His voice grated on my mind, that bored and tired drawl crawling under my skin. His head twitched to the left and I flinched, his eyes lazily wandered around me like I didn't matter, like everything didn't–

He spotted Charlotte.

A flick of his eyes to Daisy.

For the first time, something flickered in his gaze, an emotion, more solid, more firm, more malevolent.

Intrigue. Realisation. Surprise.

Interest.

“... he was right.” His words came out like a statement. Surprise and bemusement carrying it into my ears.

My breath hitched and without any hesitation, my body moved on its own, covering his view of Charlotte and her starter with my body.

For a moment, I stood there, fingers still trembling, sweat dripping down my forehead, my throat shaky, still incapable of voicing anything.

Yet I stood straight, stiff and firm. Doing my best to keep my expression neutral despite my mind screaming at me to run.

He stared back, unblinking, unflinching, meeting my gaze with the expression of a man who had been stepped on by the world. The interest in his eyes still lingered although faint.

His mouth moved to say something but my roaring heart prevented me from hearing anything.

Realising that I wasn't going to move or speak, he let out a heavy sigh and finally turned around without uttering another word, his head lowered and body hunched.

My eyes didn't leave him, following every single trace of his slow, exhausting gait until he faded away into the sea of people and became part of the crowd.
 
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