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A shaggy-haired man wearing a dirty white sleeveless shirt and a pair of green trousers strode into the dark, not bothering to switch on the lights as he took a sip of his coffee on his right hand.
I think "on his right hand" could be deleted here. It sounds odd to speak of holding a cup of coffee on your hand instead of in your hand, and the detail of how exactly the man is holding his coffee seems unnecessary anyways.
Occasionally, he took sips from his mug of coffee and although he knew caffeine wouldn't do much to help him. Twas, the benefit of having a body literally built to suit his needs, he'd mostly drank it for the taste anyway.
The first sentence is a fragment and needs to be rewritten or combined with the next sentence, while "[he] mostly drank it for the taste anyway" should be its own sentence. "Twas" is usually written as "'twas", with an apostrophe. I'm unclear what you mean by "the benefit of having a body literally built to suit his needs" - if Briggs' artificial body makes him unable to get an alertness boost from caffeine, how is that a 'benefit'? Were you trying to say that his customized body means that he's already optimally alert, and so caffeine would have no further effect? Maybe rewrite to something like:
"Occasionally, he took sips from his mug of coffee, although he knew caffeine wouldn't do much to help him - 'twas one of the benefits of having a body literally built to suit his needs, that he didn't need stimulants to stay alert. He mostly drank it for the taste anyway."
The sounds of footsteps made him turn away from the monitor, he glanced behind him, seeing a lean blonde girl wearing a blue sports bra and a pair of brown shorts walking towards him.
The route filled with basic and common Pokémon, many trainers had starters that came from this route but our characters were a bit… different from the rest.
He rubbed his temples, getting the pain to recede slightly. He shivered at the weird feeling of his fingers and opened his eyes, hissing a bit at the pain from the sudden assault of light.
Recovering from the pain, he narrowed his eyes and was met with an unbelievable sight.
He blinked once then twice and then a third one for good measure.
He looked down at his fingers, or more accurately, his claws. He flexed his claws, extending and retracting them with a curious gaze.
"What am I?" he paused, looking down at his yellow underbelly, orange limbs and turning around, spotting a familiar flaming tail. He paled. "I'm orange… oh God, I'm a Charmander, aren't I?"
He gulped, and if he was still human he'd be sweating bullets. "Oh God, okay, okay. Th-this has to be a dream, right? I'm not actually a-"
"If you're in the anime world, then that'll be fine, just gotta watch out for Ash and you won't die from any legendary shenanigans. Haha, that sounds easy enough, right?" he shook his head, slapping his reptilian cheek and flinching at the unfamiliarity of his body.
When I first read this, I thought that the hooded figure was saying that the Champion was his creator, since the ethereal voice hadn't been introduced yet.
"I guess you're right, Briggs never did look like anything but a regular person." He shook his head. "I still don't get why I'm wearing this though, isn't the point of my being here is to test them?"
Samuel Oak, also known as Professor Oak, was a man in his mid-fifties. He was known for being the first to create the pokédex, a revolutionary device that contained information of every known Pokémon in existence.
Oak was curious about what lied behind his door, the three voices weren't familiar in any way, though that could be easily explained through foreigners as they'd mentioned they were trying to find his lab.
I was surprised that this has occurred before! I don't know if there's some point in the anime where Oak met a human-turned-Pokemon prior to Ash's journey, or if this is an indication that this world has some major differences from that of the anime.
Having three brothers sent to the Pokemon world instead of a singular protagonist is a bit of a twist on the usual isekai formula, and their bickering is a good way to quickly set up their character dynamics. I'm not sure at this point whether just one of them is the "Champion Sol", or if all three of them together are. (Also, is that supposed to be "Champion's soul?) If it's only one, I could see some jealousy or bad feelings arising from it later.
It's also interesting that apparently there's another layer of hierarchy above universes and multiverses in this setting. Are multiverses groupings of universes sharing some common trait? Don't know if the exact details will be relevant, but it could be neat to explore.
The chapter does a good job of establishing the scenario and getting things moving quickly, although I wonder if it might be keeping things a bit too mysterious about what exactly the significance of the Champion's Sol is and what exactly the "test" Brigg's organization is planning will entail. There isn't much tension right now, as there's no indication that the 'test' will pose a serious challenge or threat to the brothers, or that the appearance of the Sol portends any sort of oncoming danger. I think I would've been more engaged had there been more of a hint at what sort of conflict is on the horizon.
Also, you start with three scenes in a row each introducing new original characters - first Briggs and Sarah, then June, Ane and Quil, then Mysterious Floating Guy and the 'Celestial Being', with mentions of an eighth character, Cosmo - and I have no idea which ones besides the brothers are going to be important in later chapters. It feels like a lot to keep track of, and I'd suggest trying to space the introductions out a bit more. The part with Floating Guy feels like it could've been moved to the end of the chapter, given that it doesn't have any immediate effect on the brothers' narrative.
That's all I have for now. Feel free to send me a forum PM or reply here if you have any questions about the review or want to discuss the chapter further, and I hope the rest of your writing goes well.
The sunlight had shone onto the dense grove of trees, having cast short shadows below them.
A small Pidgey had perched on a tree branch, his head tilting to the left and gazing at the human under him.
The human was about eight times his height and wore a white coat that reached its knees. The human's glasses glinted in the afternoon sun, a clipboard and a strange rectangular object in its hands. "Unique Specimen has been adequately trained. Proceed to send in the newborns for the next batch of trainers as per protocols."
The Pidgey blinked and descended from the tree, landing in front of the human and staring at it.
The human ignored him and put its rectangle into its pockets. Then pulling out something round, red, and shiny gleaming in the afternoon sun, he jumped back at the sight of the ball, glaring at it like it could kill him.
The ball opened with a red burst of energy, and a strange yellow bipedal fox Pokémon took shape. The human commanded the Pokémon before vanishing in a blip of light.
Having no idea what had happened, he stood there, blinking owlishly and looking at his surroundings for a little while.
Days and weeks passed by, and he was flying over the tall grass of the field and into a geometrically perfect line of trees.
He had seen others of his kind around, but he didn't care much for them. There had also been some young humans that had gone by the route and fought some of the Pidgeys, and because of how the humans interacted with them, he figured it was better to hide than to confront the bloodthirsty trainers.
He perched on a tree, one that he frequented, and took some time to clean his feathers and maintain his perfect physique. The coat-wearing human had always said his body was well beyond the others, even going as far as to say he was perfect at times.
Sounds of rustling leaves alerted him and he caught a blur of brown at the corner of his eyes. He quickly took his beak off his wing and scanned his surroundings, a wary look in his eyes.
A long silent minute of worry crept onto his spine, his talons carrying him backwards and into something warm and feathery.
He jumped. A startled yelp escaping his beak as he quickly turned around.
A Pidgey stood there, snickering to herself. "Got 'cha, didn't I?"
He clutched his chest, taking in deep breaths to calm his racing heart. He recovered and faced the other Pidgey, snarling at her. "What was that for?"
The Pidgey spoke between snickers. "Just something to lighten up that pompous ass of yours."
"Pompous what?"
The Pidgey stopped laughing and gained a look of realization. "Oh, I getcha'. You're from that section. No wonder you're so unlike the others. You got a name here, or should I start calling you Short Stuff, Short Stuff?"
He bristled at the insult to his height, his feathers ruffling up. "I prefer if you don't call me by anything."
The Pidgey chuckled. "Of course. Of course. That human must've told you not to name yourself until you get captured."
His brow rose and he asked, "That human? You mean that white one with the yellow Pokémon?"
"Mine didn't exactly have a yellow Pokémon, but yeah. They didn't seem to care whenever I tried asking them questions. Don't know if they could understand me but, heheh you wouldn't believe how pissed off he was when I stuffed some dirt down his pants." She giggled. "It was hilarious."
He tilted his head, appalled at her actions as a concerned look crept onto his face. "Weren't you afraid they would shock you?"
"I try not to worry about it." She shrugged. "You can call me Prance by the way. Came up with it myself." She held her head high, her eyes narrowing with a smirk. She chuckled, shrugging as she sighed. "Though I'll probably have to change it when I get captured by a human."
Captured? Why on earth would she… "What does that mean exactly?"
"Hm? Oh yeah, it's those red balls, pokéballs or something, they turn us into energy or something… Didn't the human tell you about 'em?"
The colors drained off his face as he recalled the device. "Oh… so that's what they're called."
Prance nodded. "I've been looking for someone to catch me with one of 'em but–" She shrugged. "–they were a bit too weak for my taste."
"Wait, why would anyone want to live in someplace so small? Don't you want to have the skies all to yourself instead of staying in a small cramped space?"
"Eh." Prance shrugged. "I think that's a good price to pay for guaranteed strength."
Strength… She wanted to be someone's pet for more power?
He shook his head. "I don't think I want to have anything to do with humans."
"Well, tough luck, Short Stuff. You'll barely survive till next year if you don't have a trainer. Many Pidgeys and Rattatas around here will be killed or sent to a breeding centre if you don't get captured by a human."
"What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Being killed and used as a breeding machine just because he didn't want to be a human's pet. How does Prance know this?
"Yup." She nodded. "I barely survived last year when I saw them coming. Being a human's pet is so much easier than trying to survive in the wild, there's no food around here and we can't last more than a year without proper nutrition. Plus, I could get so much stronger if I had a human. Would be nice to be on top of something for once." Prance then pointed a wing behind him. "Oh look, there's one right now! See ya!"
Prance took off, leaving him alone to ponder over her words.
If I don't find a human, I'll die… But he didn't want to be bound to someone, he wanted to be free, to soar above the clouds and see the world.
But was it worth dying for?
Days passed and he spent the majority of the daylight dodging any fights and capture from the small humans. It was when the sun was setting, did he see her again.
The Pidgey, Prance fluttered down, a smirk on her face. “Yo! How's it hanging, Short Stuff. I love what you've done with the place!” His face was blank, not a hint of the annoyance he was feeling showing when he saw her ‘admiring’ his perch. “Wide, open and an amazing view of the sky. Of course, it's nowhere near as awesome and roomy as my branch but it comes as a very close second place.”
He spun around, trying to ignore her.
She flew closer to him, blocking his view of the field. “So!” She spread her wings wide open. “Got your eye on someone yet? ‘cause I certainly got mine on one.” The grin on her face twitched until she broke down into laughter. “Oh who am I kidding. Everyone here’s too weak for someone like moi.”
He stared at the Pidgey in front of him, his eyes twitching in annoyance at the proudness radiating from her. “What do you want?” he said.
“Nothin’ much.” She admitted with a wink. “Just wanted to talk, y’know. Your face was all gloomy and doomy and you're out here all alone! Life’s too short to not enjoy it with other people!” she exclaimed before her expression took on a more mischievous note. “And speaking of short…”
Gloomy and doomy? She really thought he could act like nothing had happened after the revelation she dropped on him. How was he supposed to react? Happily waiting to be trapped in those pokéballs? He’d rather take to the skies and bask in freedom regardless of the pain.
A mass of feathers covered his vision and he flinched, the teasing look in Prance’s eyes filling his sight. “Tag! You're it!” She poked him with a wing and fled, leaving him in a state of confusion.
She returned moments later when he didn't make any movement.
“You're supposed to chase me, y’know,” she said, flying back down and returning to her perch.
“...why would I do that?”
“It’s a game I saw from my travels… probably one of the few good things I learned…” she muttered under her breath before shaking her head. “You're supposed to chase me, then I chase you, then you chase me again… Come on, try it! I can guarantee it'll be loads of fun!”
“That sounds like a waste of energy,” he said as blunt as the branch they were on.
“Nothing’s a waste if you enjoy yourself!” A sincere smile was on her face, she sounded like she truly believed that. “Come on, give it a go!”
It only took a few moments for his composure to falter and he relented. “Alright. Fine, let's play. But, don't come whining about it if I get you more than you do.”
“Hah! That's the spirit!”
Weeks passed by, he and Prance met a few more times during this period. They sometimes played games she found from her travels, other times they chatted; Prance mostly talked and laughed about how weak everyone who came to this place was.
And while he wouldn't admit it verbally, lest he gave her another topic to tease him about, he had been enjoying their little interactions, it was fun having another Pokémon around.
On one starry night as he sat perched on a branch, scratching his talons against the bark of the tree and carving a small portrait of a pokéball. He focused on the bark, his eyes screwing up and his mind wandering. Freedom… is it really worth it? He grimaced, a wing hovering over his stomach. Maybe Prance has the right idea.
His mind wandered over to the female Pidgey, memories of her talons fidgeting and wings fluttering along with her laughing wholeheartedly at her own stupid jokes came to his mind.
He wondered why it was easier to remember her when he had met dozens of other Pidgeys in the past month.
Maybe it was the way she laughed, or how her feathers ruffled in delight when he pronounced his annoyance to her. Maybe…
A name… she has a name… he reasoned, shaking his head as his stare intensified. But do… Do I want one? Would it… would it serve any purpose? What… what could I use? Do names have to mean something?
A tap on his shoulder brought him back to reality. He turned around and saw Prance with two small round objects in her beak.
"Yo, ya' done with your brooding yet? I found these when a trainer got beaten by a Rattata," she said, snorting a bit. "I know, losing to a Rattata, how weak can you be?"
She placed one of the orbs in front of him and he stared at it blankly, not sure what it even was.
Prance noticed his expression and said, "Never seen an Oran Berry before? They're some pretty good stuff."
She chewed and swallowed the fruit, expelling a breath of satisfaction. "Nothing like a good berry to keep me going. Just imagine all the berries I could eat if I got a human."
She frowned, noticing the Pidgey still staring at his food with a blank look. "Hey, you alright? If-if you don't like it, I could go find something else for you–"
"Why?"
Prance raised a brow. "Why what?"
"Why do you deal with me? Why do you talk to me? I can't even remember any of the Pidgeys around here but you, you still remember me… I… don't even know my parents. I-I don't know if I have any siblings… or whether anyone here's one of them or if they're dead or–"
Prance placed a wing on him, cutting him off with a gentle pat. "Hey, it's alright. You're alright. I don't know my parents either so I know how you feel. It's okay to feel like this like you're all alone in a large world controlled by monsters. It's okay to feel these emotions, you're still young. We all are."
She walked away with a sigh, her eyes staring into the sky with a look of longing. "... I've spent a long time… a long long time trying… I've spent so much of my life searching for my purpose, chasing my dreams, my ideals… and yet…” Her head lowered, her voice trembling. “It hurt so much. The loneliness, the hunger, the pain. I thought I was above it all, above the suffering my freedom caused me…”
She whimpered, a tear trailing down her cheek. “... no one should ever experience that. No one should ever see what I saw… It's why I try. I tried so damn hard to help them, help them find their trainers, find their purpose in life.” She took in a breath, a bitter chuckle escaping her. “Most never make it past their first month and… others had merely forgotten about me." She chuckled bitterly. "It's kinda why I gave myself a name. I wanted to make other Pokémon remember me, to make them know me, to let them know what they shouldn't be like. I wanted them to know that they're not alone, that their world can be so much more than just death and battles even… even if you have to give up your freedom for comfort, for love. For a chance to be the best."
She paused, looking back at him with a timid frown. Her legs took her back to his side, she grabbed him by the shoulders and stared straight into his eyes, a tired sigh escaping her beak. "Look, Short Stuff… I actually had many chances to leave and never look back but you… you reminded me of myself… when I was confused, young, stupid and so full of myself. I thought I could take on the world without a trainer, to continue a life with my freedom but…"
He felt something wet dripping onto him and her body shaking against his. Prance took in a breath, her voice shaky. "But it… it only gave me pain… there's nowhere that the humans haven't taken control of. You need to remove that selfish idea that you could make a difference, that you could live on without help… please, for your sake and… for my sake, please don't leave… don't waste your life chasing freedom when it'll only bring you pain… Don't make the same mistake I made."
Her sniffles grazed his hearing. She wept on his shoulder, causing him to flinch and making his heart weep in return.
He took in a breath, now understanding why she did this. He understood now that he had to do this, he had to tell her. "Perry… Prance, call me Perry."
She glanced at him, her bleary eyes making him pause but he proceeded regardless.
"And… and I can't do something like that, Prance. I… I don't want to live a life where I'm a pet… a slave to their whims… I want to fly around the world… see everything… experience the dangers myself… I will not be bound… I won't be bound by fear."
Prance sighed, wiping her tears away with a wing. "I see… if that's what you really want… then I'm sorry… I'm sorry I couldn't make you understand…”
Perry flinched, feeling the words stabbing through him as he watched her leave.
He took in a breath as he leaned against the tree. He plucked some nearby leaves and created a makeshift blanket, emptying his mind and trying to lull himself to sleep.
The silence of the night did nothing to quell her words and tears. They echoed endlessly in his mind, making him squirm uncomfortably as his mind drifted into a dreamless rest.
The moon gave way to the sun as it shone down on the sleeping Pidgey.
He woke up to a loud voice screaming, "Pidgey, use Gust!"
The sounds of winds whipping alerted him, his body taking off before his mind could comprehend those words.
The tree branch he was previously on was shredded to pieces, and he whipped his head around, staring at something that hit him like a punch to the gut.
The Pidgey that flew opposite of him was familiar and he couldn't believe his eyes. He didn't want to believe them.
Prance hovered opposite of him, her hazel eyes narrowed and glaring at him.
But… but there was something wrong with her. There was no humour in her eyes, no sadness, no anger, nothing.
Not even an acknowledged look.
Her eyes were glazed over like she wasn't even focusing on him.
"Quick Attack!"
He glanced down, seeing a male human child pointing a finger at him. That action distracted him and he took the attack head-on.
He staggered as Prance flew back, her eyes still unfocused and her breath steady.
Perry recovered mid-air, regaining his altitude as he shouted at her, "Prance, it's me, Perry! Why-why are you attacking me?"
She didn't respond, it was like she didn't even hear him.
"Prance, I'm sorry! I'm sorry for leaving you! Please stop, I don't want to hurt you!"
"Quick Attack again!" the child shouted.
She blurred forward, crashing into him with her beak.
A shot of pain went through him as he came to a cold realization. Something happened to her… was it the human? Did they do something to her?
Perry tumbled to the ground, his breaths slow and heavy. He took off much slower than before and hollered, "Prance, snap out of it! Please! I don't want to hurt you!"
But she didn't stop, she charged at him, breath steady and eyes emotionless as the human called out more commands.
Perry grimaced, dodging the oncoming attacks with surprising ease. Why is she so slow? She was nowhere near this slow when we played...
He flew higher into the sky, watching in surprise when she stopped her attacks and gazed everywhere but up.
Why is she doing this? Did our time together mean nothing? Perry shook his head. No, she was too genuine to be faking that. Something must've–
A flash of his crudely made Poké ball came to his mind.
"There was nothing around that the humans haven't taken control of."
The pokéball, it did something to her but what? How did it make her like this? She's… she's like a mindless animal.
Perry glanced down, noticing that she was still looking around aimlessly.
He dropped his head, a tear dropping from his eye as he flew further into the sky. I'm sorry, Prance. I'm sorry I made you think I didn't care… I'll… I'll find a way to help you, to save you, no matter what. Just wait for me, Prance.
"Wait for me…" He had stared back at the shrinking land, his shoulders having felt much heavier as he flew.
The basalt floor cracked and broke beneath his talons. Perry shook his head, growling at the man in front of them.
"Wise choice," Crude said, curling his hand up as the biggest Pokémon in the portal became enshrouded in a purple glow.
The Pokémon around the blue bird cried out in shock as she disappeared in a flash of light.
The Swellow squawked in surprise, suddenly appearing in front of them. Stirring and groaning, her eyes groggily looked around her before she spotted the two birds. "Perry? Rower? Wh-what's going on? Where's– the human! Perry, we must–"
"No, Sil. We can't." Perry grimaced, loathed as he may, he couldn't let her attempt a fight she couldn't win. "This… this thing isn't a normal human. He–you've seen what he did to the village. We can't–"
Sil shook her head, wings spread in shock. "Excuse me? Are you just gonna give up? He has our friends in there!" Perry took care to avoid her glare, causing the Swellow to moan out in frustration. She turned around and if looks could kill, Crude would be dead well over three times. "You! Release our citizens!"
Crude lazily gazed at the Swellow, a hand rubbing his chin. "Nah, I don't think I will. Need something to satiate my boredom after all." He tilted his head, dodging a blue bird-shaped flame. Then he leaned forward, evading a wing that gleamed like metal. Snapping his fingers, he froze her in place, regarding her shocked gasp with an annoyed glance. "Look, if you really want the others to be free. You just have to do a little thingy for me, 'mkay? That sounds fair, doesn't it?"
"You reckless imbecile!" Rower hissed before Perry slipped through his grasp and started charging towards the man with murder in his eyes. "Not you too," he groaned.
"Sil!" Perry rushed forward without a second thought, his talons out and wings spread, Perry charged the man at speeds faster than the human eye could perceive. Winds kicked, sharp and quick rushing at the man.
The man, however, didn't move, not looking phased by his attack as the same smirk continued to stretch across his face. It irked Perry when the man allowed the winds to hit with naught but a passing glance. Dust clouded his vision before suddenly, a hand reached out, grabbing Perry by the neck and slamming him into the ground with more force than necessary to subdue the Pidgeot.
His back roared in pain, rocks scraped against his back, tearing off some feathers. But Perry didn't let the pain slow his wrath as he pushed through, slashing and tearing at the man's arms and for a moment, he was sure he was cutting off bits of flesh.
But like before, all he did was delay the inevitable.
An amused chuckle was the last thing he heard before he felt himself flying into the wall at sound-breaking speeds with the surface, somehow, still in perfect condition. Stirring in agony, Perry fell onto the ground with a heavy thud, breathing heavily with an eye shut tight and blood dripping down his head.
The pain didn't last long however as he heard the man snap his fingers once more and the injuries on Perry's body healed themselves, flesh stitching and sewing back together, bones mending, and feathers regrowing.
"Heh heh, an impressive display of bravado, my little birdies," Crude said, checking his nails and absolutely relishing in their pain before shrugging and returning turning his head to them. "But that's the thing, isn't it? Simple bravado… well, it can only take you so far." The smirk on his face grew an unsettling amount, his fangs bared and threatened to split his face entirely, and his eyes glowed brighter, the ominous gold ensnaring a tinge of crimson that seemed to dance like the flame of a torch, shimmering like the starry night. The red on his head started dripping onto the floor like water pouring, smearing the basalt before stretching outwards, seemingly coming to life. Like a web being spun, it spread, capturing him in a world of red.
As Perry emerged in the new world of crimson and familiarity, a voice cried out to him, screaming at him for his past transgressions.
And he turned, standing face-to-face with the one he had abandoned.
“Liar!” she screeched.
Her eyes lingered on the torches lining the walls, the familiar grey and white giving her a strange sense of foreboding. The torches were still lit, which was strange. No mon should've been out this late, not even the usually nocturnal mons. The Tyrant had made it clear that using the darkness was more of a liability than a benefit.
Evie narrowed her eyes, brows furrowing as she scanned the area, taking note of the droplets of blood and torn feathers on the ground. There was no doubt in her mind now, Perry definitely had something to do with this.
She turned her head slightly, catching the Charmander in her peripheral vision.
June, the apparent 'human', was glancing at their surroundings, his brown eyes wide and curious (didn't all Charmanders have blue eyes?). After a moment, he noticed her stare and flinched, backing away slightly and looking more interested in his claws than her.
That action made her stomach churn and she looked away, shaking her head in an effort to distract herself from the guilt. She swiveled her ears in his general direction, and his strange Aura was brought to her attention once more. Again, it was still the same disgusting mix of lukewarm and half-full, a horrid unnatural viscous and slimy mixture that shouldn't be possible, and yet, there was something about it, something that she couldn't quite put a claw on. It felt kinda familiar? Similar? Like it was something she'd felt before?... No, no that wasn't it.
Ugh, nothing about this made sense.
A Fire-type claiming to be a human with an Aura that could simply be described as abnormal... None of this made any sense.
How she wished he was a simple deranged, insane Pokémon, that would've been so much easier to handle. However, life, it seemed, was still unpredictable even in these peaceful times.
"So, um thanks for the help back there. I-I appreciate it." His voice cut through the quiet atmosphere and her shoulders tensed up.
Blinking, she found herself turning towards him, a barely noticeable flinch in his steps being the first thing she saw. The second being the fear in his eyes.
Arceus damn it, why were they so afraid of her? She hadn't meant to hurt him like that, if she knew he was gonna act like this she wouldn't hav– She shook her head. Why was she trying to justify herself? It wasn't like she was trying to kill him. It wasn't her fault that he couldn't handle a fraction of her powers.
Of course, that didn't help in lessening the guilt festering in her.
"Don't mention it," she said, her eyes boring into his with cold indifference. She turned around, her ears twitching at the sounds of his nervous chuckling. She tried not to let the tinge of fear in his voice affect her.
"Ri-right… So about this 'her', I'm guessing you were talking about your sister, right?" he said, stumbling over his words.
Evie simply nodded an answer.
"She must be really… important to you, huh? Um, like… well, I guess it makes sense since I almost–err… well…" He made an exaggerated coughing sound, “What am I saying, of course she's important…” he murmured before turning his head back and continuing, “Anyways, I–"
She didn't know what it was, but something told her he wouldn't stop trying to make short talk until she had answered and that was… totally fine, it wasn't like she'd told him to pipe down mere minutes ago! Why wouldn't he just fucking listen to her and shut up?
She turned around with a snarl, putting a paw forward and crushing the pebble beneath her into dust. "You want me to talk? Fine! My sister, Zeal. She's a cute little Zorua that I would give my life for! I'd raised her since she was hatched twelve years ago! She is my only reason for living, my one true support in life. Without her, I wouldn't be where I am. Without her, my life would have no meaning. Without her, I–" She shook her head, biting her tongue. "I have no reason to live. I'd never forgive myself if I let anything happen to her."
The last part she'd muttered to herself, uncaring of whether he'd heard her or not.
Then she glanced at the Charmander, his arms were held up in front of him in a pitiful attempt to defend himself. She could see the subtle shaking in his legs, his tail flame glowing a little brighter, and the hesitant fear in his eyes. Taking in a breath to calm herself, she gave him a dull stare. "Well? Did that satisfy you?" When she got no verbal response in turn, she sighed and shook her head. "Whatever. Let's just get going, I got a certain bird I have to interrogate."
No longer caring for an answer, she turned around, her ears subconsciously swivelling in his direction as she trotted away.
"D-do you really mean that?" The fear in his stutter froze her for a moment, the question registering in her a second later.
Without missing a beat, she turned her head and answered, "Yes and nothing will stop me from keeping her safe and happy."
"I… wow um, I don't really know how to put this to words but… erm, I–uh… that's… that's really… admirable. I-I mean devoting yourself to making someone else happy? That's just… and I'm sorry if this sounds a little personal," he said, fiddling with his claws and taking quick and short glances at her. "But um, ar-are you sure you're fine? Li-like this, I mean. Disregarding your own worth, basing yourself on someone else's happiness. That just… that just doesn't sound healthy… I mean, don't you want to find your own happiness? Have fun with your life, live it, make friends, explore, and learn things to your heart's content–"
"Stop." The sudden sharpness in her voice quickly shut him up. She glared at him, daring him to defy her. With a growl in her voice, she spoke, having tried her hardest to not jump straight to shouting. "Stop trying to sound like you know what I've been through. You have NO idea what my or anyone else's life is like. So please… shut your mouth before I change my mind about your 'help'.”
"I-I–" He flinched, stepping back and relenting with a stutter. "O-okay."
The two traversed through the caverns in silence.
Evie didn't bother giving him a second glance as she guided him through the tunnels, her eyes meeting the ground, knowing that she'd given more than what she'd like to that boy.
A Shinx in his bed of straw stirred in his sleep, shivering, his paws stretched and moved in search of any nearby warmth. Whimpering as the cold assaulted the cub, he curled into a ball, ears lowered. "Mama…"
Shez, in his sleep, moved his paws, swinging at the air as he searched in vain for his mother. He awoke moments later, eyes opening slowly, glancing around as confusion set upon him.
"Mama?" He rubbed his eyes, getting to his feet. "Where are you?" Where was his mama? Did she leave for the harvest already? He thought he'd told her he wanted to join her this time. Did she think he couldn't handle it?
Pouting, he made his way outdoors, and just as he looked around the strangely quiet village, he felt a chill running down his spine. Something wasn't right. Things felt cold and his stomach churned, his fur sparking with electricity as he trotted around the village, around a nearby corner, and made his way towards the central roundabout.
To him, the village had always felt scary at night. It was too quiet, with nothing but the sounds of snoring accompanying the dark, it was creepy as it always felt like the moon was peering down at him, taunting him for his lack of night vision as it painted the village in a chilly pale glow. But tonight, it had felt extraordinarily eerie like something was looking at him, stalking him in the dark.
Every step he took, every house he glanced at, there was nothing and yet, he could feel as if there was something, always just out of his sight but always staring.
Left. Right.
He looked at his surroundings, the outer torches were unlit, the wooden houses playing a hollow roar as the night breeze brushed by. The pale moon above shone down on him, tainting the empty village in its eerie color.
Empty.
Empty.
Empty.
Everywhere he looked, there was nothing but empty, abandoned houses, almost like the Pokémon around had been snatched in their sleep. He couldn't hear them. He couldn't smell them. He couldn't see them.
Where was everyone? Did something come up? Shez moved around quietly, peeking his head into a house every now and then, his stomach sinking lower and lower as he gazed upon another empty building.
"Mama? Aunty Carly? Guardian Sil?" His voice trembled as he ran off and away towards the center of the small village, his voice echoed. "Wh-where are you?"
No one was around.
No one was around.
He was alone. Alone.
Alone.
Shez finally made it. He found that the fountain in the centre was still working, with water spewing out the statue's beak. Yet, the sight of the statue did little to comfort him.
No one was around, he was alone. All alone and with–
Rustle.
Something moved. He jumped, head turning side-to-side, eyes scanning every little nook and cranny around him.
Something was in the dark with him and whatever it was, it was fast. Every time he even caught a glimpse of his stalker, it vanished into a blur.
He could hear his heart pumping in his ears, his eyes struggling to keep his speedy stalker in sight as he subconsciously took a few steps behind.
His hindquarters touched something, something warm and fluffy. Yelping, he jumped, legs spread as he fell onto his belly. Scrambling to his feet, he squeaked out. "Ah! Who's there? I-I-I know how to use Spark! So do-don't mess with me–"
"Hmph, you really gonna do that to me, Shez?" a familiar voice said. Blinking, he turned, the frightened look on his face fading as a smile dawned on him.
"Gild?"
The Purrloin grinned, arms stretched out as Shez tackled her to the ground, forelegs wrapping around her waist and nuzzling into her chest. "Gild! You–I thought… I… my mama… I… alone… no one–there was no one around and I-I was… I was so scared and… and…"
He let loose all the stress onto his long-time friend and in return, she began stroking his back in an attempt to soothe his shivering, chuckling as she said, "You big baby." She shook her head, her warmth doing wonders to his nerves. "Thank Arceus, you're okay…" She sounded so relieved as she tightened the hold around him.
The embrace lasted a couple moments before she pushed him away slightly and gripped his shoulders, her eyes staring straight into his eyes with a serious look. "Shez, we need to find Perry."
"Hu-huh?"
"I–I don't have time to explain this, Shez but the village… isn't safe. There's a human out here." She glanced around, eyes narrowing and taking in their surroundings.
"A-a human?" He paled. There had been stories of humans, the ones his mama always told especially freaked him and his friends out. They told of their technologies, able to take control of any Pokémon, regardless of their strength or experience. They told of their determination, always facing danger despite the risk of death. They told of their nature, cruel and viewing Pokémon as nothing but tools. It was the type of story that scared him and his friends no matter how many times they'd heard it.
And if Gild was correct…
He glanced back, noting the look in her eyes, and gulped.
The empty village… a human had taken them.
A human had taken his mama.
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Chapter 5 : A Troubling Betrayal and A Vengeful Wrath
It had been a long time since Rower had seen Perry tremble in such fear. The way his pupils had shrunken to mere pinpricks, how his body quivered and curled into itself like a young chick huddling underneath a mother’s plumage, how his talons and muscles were tensed up as if he was debating on whether to run or fight.
And it was as painful a sight as the few times he'd seen Perry this way.
It only took Rower a few seconds to discern the cause. His friend was one to linger in the past, the pain, the trauma, all of which Rower had long since accepted and moved on from. Therapy wasn't a skill he was proficient in, but even still, he despised how utterly worthless he was when it came to helping others heal from their scars.
Letting out a sigh, he turned to his friends. The plan brewing in his mind wasn't as thorough as he'd like and frankly, he wasn't even sure if it could carry them through the night but it was all he could come up with in such a short amount of time. Their objective was simple: capture Evie and present her to the human.
And ignoring the way his mind screamed at him for his traitorous ways, he couldn't afford distractions at the moment, not when his citizens and friends were in danger. He grimaced, hoping that Evie would find it in her to forgive them one day.
He relayed his plan of actions, biting down the urge to flinch at the two’s gazes. Sil was obviously the most reluctant, Evie was practically her role model with how she admired the vixen’s strength. Perry was silent but agreeing.
Rower took much care to not show the concern on his face.
They had to capture her. That was a simple objective.
But beating her was another story and one he wasn't sure they could find the ending to.
Breathe in. Breathe out. Flex your Aura and remove any unnecessary distractions.
She needed to be calm. Calm. Calm. Calm…
The emotions in her convulsed, escaping her feeble attempts at silencing them and striking back with a vicious whip. Evie flinched and let out a quiet groan. Why wasn't it working? Why wouldn't her mind listen to her? She never had any problems reining them in before. Why was it only recently did she have trouble keeping them down?
There in her moment of weakness, like the wicked burst of flames, it struck.
… ar-are you sure you're fine? Li-like this, I mean. Disregarding your own worth, basing yourself on someone else's happiness. That just… that just doesn't sound healthy…
She held back a gasp, eyes shut tightly as she shook her head. Those words continued to echo in her mind, fading into a quiet obscurity but never quite leaving her head. The torches nearby mocked her as the unfamiliar familiarity of his distorted Auta trickled into her senses.
He has no right! She growled, tearing herself away from her thoughts. How dare he talk about her as if he knew her… he knew nothing… nothing…
So then, why did her chest feel lighter hearing them?
The air grew raspy, a pressure not unlike Evie’s first real confrontation with them bore down on her shoulders. But gone was the weak little girl that could barely stand up to her superiors, Evie glared harder as a loud silence wrapped around them. Everything came to a standstill, a stalemate.
Drip. Drip. Drip. Her ears twitched. Like a clock ticking down. Water from a stalactite elsewhere dripped down, splashing onto a puddle she couldn't quite see from her position.
And it continued to…
Drip.
Drip.
Drip…
Winds kicked up. Her senses pinged something long before her body did and her reflexes went to work, leaping over the attack before she even noticed it. The floor where she stood exploded into dust and debris, the force of the attack lodging pebbles into her fur.
She blinked furiously, the prickling in her eyes made her fail to notice it before it was too late.
Pain. The burning, searing sensation of a familiar coursed through her body. Blood smeared across her fur and she bit back a cry, eyes trailing the rock that grazed her. Her ears perked up. But her mind was elsewhere.
They were attacking her. Why? Why would they–
Her vision swarmed with blue and agony sent her chest ablaze. With little resistance, her body was flung through the air, the harsh winds accelerating, throwing her even further until she crashed head-first into the rocky walls.
The rocks broke and fragmented, cutting into her flesh as she fell onto the ground like a lifeless puppet, blood leaking from her ears. She laid there for a second, for two and they did not hold back, firing a series of razor-sharp winds and rocks at her fallen form.
When the dust settled, all she saw was red.
The adrenaline spiked her anger and all signs of pain and exhaustion disappeared in the time it took for her heart to beat. The muscles in her legs tensed and she vanished, reappearing on the other side of the cave in an instant, an imperceptible streak of white trailing behind her. Evie propped herself against a nearby rocky spire and jumped.
The single action allowed her to traverse the sky with ease and Perry let out a startled squawk at her sudden appearance. Her fangs were exposed, violence and anger quivered in her eyes and static danced around her figure. A loud sound akin to metal swords clanging and clashing against each other escaped her mouth as the static all converged into a single location.
Then like a switch being flipped, she gasped and the attack flickered out of existence. What was she doing? That was too much power. She bit her tongue, twisting her body in the air and smacking him with her tail.
Unfortunately, Sil flew in between them and was ready to parry the blow away. Perry flew away to safety, the winds starting back up and harsher than ever. Evie clicked her tongue. "Why are you–" She never finished her question as she was forced into blocking the follow-up attack from Rower.
She clicked her tongue in annoyance and with a graceful display of agility, caught herself before she could fall splat onto the ground. Not letting up her offence, a ring of stars surrounded her, moving so fast they looked more like yellow blurs instead. They fired off and honed in on her assailants as she ran, avoiding dozens of attacks by the skin of her teeth.
Dust and stone followed her trail, with each subsequent attack getting closer and closer. Evie took in a breath and exhaled slowly but that did little to quell her slowly growing anger.
Winds kicked up, and Evie's ears twitched, perking up at the sudden change in the atmosphere. She jumped, leaping over a rush of sharpened winds that tore into the ground.
Fragments of rock flew into the air, lodging themselves into her fur as another ping of Aura entered her range. Without blinking, she ducked under a Steel Wing and snarled, clawing at the Swellow who barely dodged the swing.
Evie inhaled sharply, her foreleg trembling when she realised what she'd almost done. Pain soon followed that moment of mercy as something tore through her side, splattering blood all over the ground.
She bit back a cry just in time to notice a white streak escaping her sight. Her fluttering mane was making it all the harder to see as dust clouded the rocky field. Panting as blood oozed from the wound in her thigh and the various injuries around her body, her muzzle narrowed into a snarl. Alright. She had enough. She didn't understand why they were attacking her but if they weren't going to listen to her then so be it.
Her ear twitched and once again, a ping of Aura followed and she leapt backward, priming a green ball of energy and firing it off before Sil could react. The attack detonated in mid-air as she was forced to concentrate on another arriving foe, leaping to the side, she dodged a beak aimed at her before twisting on her heel and stomping the ground, dislodging a small ball of mud at the Fearow. That distracted him long enough for her to follow up. Her teeth shone with dark energy and she rushed him, intending to take the bigger threat out first.
However, a change in the wind made her abandon her attack. She halted all of her momentum, a sharp stone barely nicking her cheek when she stumbled back.
A growl escaped through gritted teeth as her eyes locked in on the Pidgeot flying far and high above. She ducked beneath a sharp gust of wind and crushed the ground below before retaliating with her hind legs, sending the broken basalt into the sky and covering her escape.
Her wounds were slowing her down but without the moon and with how aggressive they were, she couldn't spare the energy to heal what were ultimately superficial. They had been smart to cage her in here where the limited space made it all the harder to move around. Sure they would theoretically have the same problem as her but flight allowed them to manoeuvre in ways she could never hope to achieve.
A shower of rocks snapped her back to reality and she countered with a heavy sweep of her tail. Unfortunately, it seemed like she miscalculated just how fast they were as her attack left her open to the Drill Peck that tore through her chest. “Fuck!” she cried out but forced herself to fight through the pain as she opened her jaw, dark energy resurfacing to her teeth as she bit down on the Fearow’s wing.
Rower grunted in pain but didn't let up, his attack pushing deeper and deeper into her flesh.
Evie sank her teeth deeper and doubled down, swinging her head back and forth furiously and trying to tear the limb off its socket. A blow from the back knocked her away but not before a satisfying crunch met her ears and she saw the Fearow nearly crash straight onto the ground. Sure, she’d sustained some damage but she dealt a serious blow to their–
Rower’s body became enshrouded in a cloak of feathers and light.
Fuck! When did he learn that? She leapt into action but was met with an oncoming flaming projectile that delayed her approach. Growling at the distraction, she evaded Sil with a display of agility, only getting her paws nicked as she launched a green ball of energy at Rower, disrupting him from fully healing. But she was too late and Rower took to the air once more, albeit a lot slower than before. This was getting irritat– No! She was infuriated! How dare they attack her! After taki–kidnapping her sister! She glanced back at Sil before flicking a nearby rock into the air with her tail and destroying the approaching stony projectile into a mist of dust, her eyes still locked on the Swellow that now had her beak opened.
Dread crept into her senses as she knew what was to come, Evie had to do something and quick before–
A screech pierced through her thoughts, the sheer force of the booming sound threatening to throw her off her feet. Her ears planted firmly against her skull but that did little to mitigate the agony her head was going through. She struggled to stay tall on her paws but she could bear through it, she had experienced far worse than this.
The explosive sound suddenly cut off and Evie leapt out of the three-metre crater that now stood in the middle of the field, her blurry vision catching sight of the Swellow who seemed distracted. She caught Sil saying something but she couldn't quite hear what was said with the ringing in her ears. At the very least, it seemed like they were letting up on their attacks and thus, allowing her to breathe a little before the fight began once more. The tension in the air was still there, though strangely feeling even more oppressive and suffocating than before. She didn't dwell on that any longer, she had to use the time provided to recover and–
Evie flinched as a raging inferno washed over her senses. The amount of anger and hatred that reached into her uncontested, shook her, merging in with her exhaustion. She let out a hiss, glaring hateful daggers at the Swellow before her. And yet, as sudden as it may be, she knew these emotions didn't fully belong to her.
No, the vengeful wrath belonged to Sil.
Sil turned and Evie followed suit, just in time to see two feline children running away from a screaming… Charmander.
Time crawled to a stop. Every fibre of her being ached with a fire that she’d always welcome and her mind was elsewhere. A flaming bird-shaped projectile soared through the sky, the blue flames tinted with streaks of white as it barrelled down and straight toward–
Without a second thought, her body moved.
And her world became cloaked with flames that were once an ally.
If he had only one word to describe the battle before him, it would be intense. The difference between watching something like this on video or TV was immense. Even this far, he could physically feel the strength and speed behind each attack. The level of savagery as their attacks ravaged the land, cutting large gashes into the field, slicing any obstacles in their way like they were paper mache. It was insane.
And that wasn't mentioning how Evie was capable of handling herself in a one-on-three. The way she moved, untethered by the various wounds on her body, the strength behind her attacks, where the world seemed to shake and cave under their power, and the sheer baffling speed his reptilian eyes couldn't even perceive. It was incredible! God, he wished his brothers were here to see… this…
Oh… right…
… he’d done it again…
What was he doing wasting his time around here? Standing around and gushing about someone he'd insulted and hurt? Why wasn't he living up to his word and helping her or looking for his brothers? Was he really that simple-minded that he'd immediately latch onto the closest distraction and ignore everything around him?
His eyes lingered on the battle playing out before he tore them away, gritting his teeth and glaring at his clenched fists. What was the point of being a damn Pokémon if he couldn't do anything and stand around like a worthless chump? Maybe he should just leave and look for his brothers. It wasn't like Evie needed him. He would just be in the way.
June sighed. Why was he thinking like this? Was he really thinking of running away instead of keeping his damn promise? Was he that much of a coward? His arms shook as he took a step back, his tail flame flaring and–
His body froze and the last of his breaths faded into a colourless mist. His arms and legs felt stiff, staying locked against his sides and feeling like he was in a wad of putty. White seeped into the corners of his vision, the cavernous walls breaking down as black spots swam in the air.
He shut his eyes, biting down on his lip. He didn't want to be here. Not again. Not again! What did he do wrong? Why was he here again? Why couldn't he leave? Why couldn't he move? He was scared. He didn't want to see that orb again. He didn't want to feel like that again. Never again.
But the void didn't listen as it forcibly opened his eyes, keeping them locked tight on the darkness that surrounded him. There it was. He could see it again.
Its writhing, twisted form of distorted reality, begging, screaming at him to grasp it, to utilise it to its fullest potential. Its soothing, ethereal, calming voice allured his being, his essence, his very soul, tempting him, whispering soft, delectable words into his mind. About how he was specially chosen to fulfil its wishes, about how he was the only one capable of doing this, about what he could do with its power.
Yes, he has to grasp it, grab it in his hands and–
"No!" June screamed, tearing his arm away from the orb and out of the endless realm. "I'm done with this! No one's going to force me into doing anything! Not a magical force, not a magical clone, not anyone! I'll finish what I've started and I'm through with hiding and running! I'm going to–to…"
In his heightened state of determination, he had initially failed to notice two newcomers, two Pokémon who were currently staring at him with wide, terrified eyes.
He stared at them for an awkward second that felt like a millennium and he raised an arm, waving at them with a nervous grin in an attempt to diffuse the situation. "Uh, hi there?"
They, in response to his friendly gesture, cried out bloody murder and ran.
And he, without even a second of consideration, made his decision in the form of chasing them down and shouting at them, attempting to dissuade whatever false image they had of his breakthrough.
They did not listen.
And as he made his way onto the battlefield, ignoring the alarms ringing in his head, he missed the raging inferno of vengeance and hatred barreling towards him.
"Fire-type!"
The blood curdling shriek and the whistling in the air were the last thing he heard before the world became dark.
As the evening sun began to set, the sky above became a beautiful mesh of red and orange. Winds blew against the soft grass, the gentle breeze5 caressing the Pokémon ranger as Neo took in the fresh air. The Minun’s eyes were firm and attentive as he scanned the land below him. A beautiful sea of grass stretched as far as the eye could see. A few Pokémon were still scurrying about the land, likely wishing to use the last few minutes of the sun.
He took in a breath, closed his eyes, and flexed his ears. Nothing existed but the sounds of nature. He could make out the sounds of battling a couple of ways to the north. To the south, he could hear a Pidgey nesting nearby, sounding exhausted from a day full of hunting. And around him, he could feel the warmth radiating from his Flygon, Peach.
Despite what some Pokéhumans may say, being a Pokémon did have its advantages. Sure, there had been times when he wondered what life would be like if he was still human, but nothing could replace the memories he made along the way. A small smile made its way onto the Minun’s face before it fell slightly as Peach, suddenly flew to a stop, eyes locking onto something he couldn’t quite see.
Odd, now what could be getting her attention? “Peach? What’s wrong?” he asked, ears twitching as he looked around. They were just on their last flight around the route. What was so important for her to stop?
“I think I see someone, Neo,” she said, quirking a curious brow from the ranger.
“Someone? What do you mean?–”
“Hang on tight, Neo! I’m gonna go check it out!”
Neo baulked at what she meant, and was clutching tightly onto the harness in preparation. The world around him blurred as the winds kicked harder and harder, the fur on his body billowed and he shut his eyes. No matter how many times he’d done this, he still couldn’t get over the insane speeds Peach could go. Doubly so when he was on her back. In a matter of seconds, she had traversed over what might be miles before slowing to a halt and landing between a grove of trees.
She glanced around, eyes narrowing and scanning the trees as he wondered just what had gotten her attention. “It should be around here…” she muttered and Neo flexed his ears, offering some form of help in whatever had gathered his Flygon’s attention.
They flew around, rounding trees and bushes, until Neo finally spoke up. “Peach? What exactly are we looking for?”
It took a moment for her to respond. “... I don’t know… I just feel like there’s something–” Peach froze, neck rising to its full length as her eyes fluttered. Then, like something flipped inside her, her head jerked to the side and he could see her eyes narrow. “It’s there.”
He turned to the right, glancing in the direction she was flying towards before he spotted it. There was a note on a tree–no wait, it was an Exeggutor! What was an Exeggutor doing here?
He leapt off of Peach’s back, inspecting the unconscious Exeggutor before them. It didn’t look like it was harmed in any way, but its shallow breaths were concerning.
“Neo. Here, look at this.” Peach took the note taped on the Exeggutor’s body and handed it to him.
Warily, he grabbed it and as he read the piece of paper, his face turned paler and paler. “Peach… do you think you can carry this Exeggutor?” He gulped, looking at the note like it was gonna jump him.
Peach gave an affirmative nod. “Of course I can!”
“Good… let’s send this to the guys at the outpost. I think a certain professor in the local town will want to know what happened to their Pokémon.”
The Pikachu got onto his feet, eyes firmly shut as he groaned, paws clutching his head, trying to soothe the raging pain. “Argh, my head hurts,” he hissed and took in a few breaths until eventually, the pain lessened and Ane could finally open his eyes, seeing…
Nothing but darkness.
Okay, he closed his eyes again and reopened them. “Why is everything so dark?” he muttered, brows furrowed.
His surroundings were dark, darker than the blackest night, and he could barely make out his own hand–paws (he had to remember that he wasn’t human anymore) in front of him. Memories of the last hour burrowed into his mind, clouding his head with images of a certain annoying redhead.
Right... That Crude guy did this.
When I get my hands on you… He growled, promising to punch the guy when he saw him again. With the resolve set in his mind, he looked around, trying to find something in the unnatural darkness. If his brother was here, he could… no. Ane shook his head. June was an idiot. He wouldn’t be able to find his own two feet here, even if he tried. Though that was if Ane could get him to stop messing around and treat things seriously.
He walked around, stumbling around aimlessly, when the feeling of something soft and fluffy beneath snapped him back to reality, a feminine moan of pain coming from below. Startled, Ane jumped back and raised his arms in front of him, fists clenched.
“Ow, five more minutes, Evie. I don’t think that pecha berry sat right with me,” a voice said, letting out a pitiful whine.
Evie? Ane raised a brow, lowering his arms. Who the hell is Evie? He squinted his eyes in an attempt to see whoever the speaker was, but no dice. He leaned down and poked whatever just spoke, stirring the creature up.
“Okay, okay. I’m-ow up,” she said, batting his arm away with a wince. He backed up, feeling a very distinct wind around them.
The awkward silence broke when the little girl spoke in a confused tone. “Who are you? You’re not Evie… and… and where am I?” He could practically feel the eyes scrutinising him when she asked that.
“Course I’m not ‘Evie’. Do I look like a girl to you?” He scoffed.
“Maybe?” the girl said with a wince.
Ane sighed, shaking his head and pointing in front of him. “Look, kid. I don’t know where we are or what you are, but my brothers got separated from me by some weird man that looks like my brother and I need to go find them.”
“Oh, I can help you! Zeal is a great hide-and-seeker!” Zeal, he was gonna assume that was her name, exclaimed with a burst of enthusiasm that was quickly deflated by the subsequent winces and ‘Ows.’ “... Wait, man? What do you mean by man? Are you talking about humans? But there shouldn’t be any humans in Troublewood. Evie said so!”
“Troublewood? The hell is that?” Ane quirked a brow.
“Rower said that’s what our home is called! Oh oh, but I remember that Carly said it used to be called Distorted Woods!” She suddenly gasped. “Are you from the past or something? Is that why you don’t know what Troublewood is?”
Ane grew annoyed at the energetic girl. She was reminding him too much of his brother. Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he answered, “No, I’m from a different world. You can’t possibly expect me to know the names of everything.” He already had trouble keeping track of the names she just said.
“A different world? You’re from another world?” If their surroundings weren’t so bloody dark, he was sure he could see stars twinkling in her eyes. “That must mean you’re an alien! That’s so cool!”
Ane grunted. “It’s only cool if you’re not the one that got sent against your will. This stupid body can’t even grip stuff properly.” Stupid June and his stupid luck at retaining actual fingers.
Zeal let out a confused noise. “Your body? What’s wrong with it? You look like a normal Pikachu to me.”
“And that’s the problem.” He scowled. “I’m supposed to be a person, not some magical animal from a kid’s game.”
“Oh.” She paused. “Wait, if you’re not a Pikachu, then what are you?”
“A human,” he said simply, not seeing any reason to withhold that information.
“A-a human?” she exclaimed, and he heard her fall back in shock. But it didn’t take long for her to recover as Ane jumped back when he felt the little girl poking him. “You don’t look like a human… and you’re not as mean or as evil as how Perry said you’d be…”
“Hey, hey, hands off the merchandise, kid.” Ane pushed away the curious paws, touching him. “I already said that some weird doppelgänger kidnapped my brothers and me. If that Crude guy was anything like my brother, he’s probably the reason we got turned,” he murmured the last part to himself before turning to face where he thought Zeal was. “So how about you, kid? How did you get here?”
“Oh, I, uh… I don’t remember…” she said after a moment of hesitation. “Anyway, my name’s Zeal! Evie says introducing yourself is the first step to making friends!”
“I’m Ane–”
“Ane? Wait, I thought you were a boy?”
“What are you talking about? Of course, I’m a guy.”
“But Ane is a girl’s name!”
“No, it isn’t.”
“Yes, it–”
“Shut up!” Ane shouted, glaring at the direction of the voice. “I don’t know what this world’s deal is, but Ane is not a fucking girl’s name! It’s Chinese, okay? So, it’s not a fucking girl’s name!”
An awkward silence took over them after his outburst. Ane sighed. “Look, I’m sorry about that, Zeal. I didn’t mean to scream at you. I just… I just have a lot of shit on my plate right now and my fucking brother’s treating everything like it’s a game and I just–Grah! I hate this so much! I hate how my brother’s such an idiot! I hate how Quil is just playing along with him! And I fucking hate how that Crude guy is just playing with us like we’re nothing but toys–”
He felt small, fluffy arms wrapping around him. The sudden soft sensation cut his rant short, leaving him catching his breath in the tiny girl’s embrace. He didn’t have the strength in him to push her away.
Once he felt a little better, Zeal squirmed a bit before letting go. “... sorry about making fun of your name. I didn’t think you’d get mad at me.”
“It’s… fine… I guess I just hated being ignored for so long. God, I just want to go home.” Ane groaned. “I hate this stupid dark void that Crude guy put us in and–” He felt the fluffy arms wrap around him again.
But this time, the embrace didn’t feel as warm, no it was the opposite. Zeal was quivering violently, the grip around him was so tight he had problems believing it came from a small Pokémon. His mind then went on high alert when he heard sniffling and felt wetness on his fur.
Resisting the urge to shiver at the weird sensation, he asked, “Zeal? What’s wrong?”
“We-we’re in a… a d-dark void?” she stammered, a pitiful whine coming from her. “I-I can’t… I… don’t leave me alone, please. Ane, I-I don’t want to be alone…”
Unsure of what to do, he patted her head and scratched her mane like how he did so to his dogs, feeling the soft fur under his paws. “... there there…” he muttered. He had absolutely no idea what he was doing, but he wasn’t going to just ignore a crying kid. “I… uh, I won’t leave you, Zeal. You’re… you’re too cute for me to wanna leave you.”
What was he saying? Too cute? He didn’t even know what she looked like. It didn’t seem like his words were doing anything… It was probably best if he stayed quiet and let her calm down. Even if he did feel bad for not trying his best.
Ane adjusted his position, wrapping his arms around her and staying silent, providing what little comfort he could. She’d be fine, right? Pokémon were powerful critters from what he remembered. She’d get over whatever this was.
Her sniffles lessened and slowed as she gathered her bearings. “I’m… I’m sorry for being such a crybaby, Ane,” she said, voice a little muffled under his fur. “I… I just…”
“Hey, it’s okay…” He paused to figure out what to say. “It’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it.”
“I… Thanks, Ane,” she murmured. “You really are different from the stories.”
She said no more on that subject, so Ane took that as a cue to stay silent, allowing themselves a moment to relax in each other’s embrace.
Then, a powerful gust of wind blew through the void, pushing against them as a bright flash of light appeared, illuminating the void. He could feel the girl in his embrace loosen up, but he chose to ignore it when he spotted a familiar red-haired menace coming into view.
Crude phased into existence and faced them with a sharp grin on his face, which quickly faltered when he noticed the two. “Er, am I interrupting something?”
“You!” Ane shouted, stepping in front of Zeal with a paw pointed at his brother’s fake.
“Me,” Crude said, nonchalantly pointing at himself as he dodged a fist aimed at him. Snickering, he halted in the air and waited until the last second before going through the Pikachu.
Ane shivered at the chilling sensation before stumbling forward and falling onto his face, his ire spiking at Crude chuckling at his failure. Getting up, he pointed a paw at the man, who was now hovering mere inches from Zeal. “Get away from her!”
The little fox gave the man a bewildered and frightened gaze. “H-how did you… but you’re a human… only Ghost-types could… how…”
Stopping in front of her, Crude poked her in the nose and laughed at the reaction on her little vixen face. “Now, aren’t you just the most adorable little Zorua I’ve ever met,” he said, snapping his fingers and locking the approaching Ane in place. “The name’s Crude, little lady. Don’t wear out the name.”
“Huh?” was the only response he got from the confused fox.
“Let go of me!” Ane shouted, mustering all of his hatred into a single glare, which only caused the fake to wag a finger at him.
“Not until you stop trying to attack me~” Crude snickered in his hand. “Oh, I kid. You can’t hurt me even if you tried–” An explosion racked his back, and he turned with a raised brow.
“Le-let him go!” Zeal raised her voice in an act of defiance and bravery. However, that display didn’t have quite the effect she wanted, as she couldn’t quite keep her body from trembling in fear.
“I was just about to get to that, sweetie,” the fake said in a disgustingly sweet tone, looking completely unaffected by whatever caused the explosion.
Feeling returned to Ane’s body, and he flopped onto the ground with a painful ‘thud’. Growling, he got up and attempted to attack the false June.
Crude held up a finger, teleporting away just before Ane could hit him. He then reappeared several metres above them and waited for Ane to settle down before saying, “Anyway, welcome to Zgwipivxd! Or, in translatable terms, the gaps between multiverses! Well, technically you’re in my barrier inside the gaps so you’re not actually in the gaps between multiverses but…” he trailed off, chuckling nervously, “let’s just say it’s better you’re not exposed to the full breadth of the gaps. It’s kinda like beyond the concept of dimensions and infinity, and it is not a fun experience to be in, I can tell you that.”
Ane growled. This was definitely June’s creation. Only he could rambled about everything and nothing at the same time all the while keeping that stupid grin.
“Hey, I resent that thought!” Crude shouted, lowering himself down to the ground and pulling out a sheet of paper. “Unlike him, I’d already gotten my degree in multiversal travelling – which, by the way, is completely different from universal travelling, so don’t you dare get them messed up – several centuries ago!” His eyes glowed brighter, a tint of purple now creeping into his pupils, mixing in with the golden shine and making them look even more extravagant.
He blinked, burning away the purple tint that was creeping into his pupils before shaking his head. “Oops, got a bit carried away there. Now, where was I? Oh right.” He snapped his fingers before a flash of white enveloped them.
Hissing in pain at the sudden assault of light, Ane covered his eyes with an arm, bracing for what was to come. When his eyes adjusted to the sudden glare, he lowered his arms and looked around in surprise.
Surrounding them were buildings tall enough to pierce the heavens, their cubical shape reminding him of the time he’d travelled across the country to see his aunt in one of those big cities. He never could quite get rid of the awe that came when seeing such wonderful displays of human ingenuity.
His feet were on something that felt like concrete and smoothened rocks as opposed to the oddly smooth and soft surface earlier, and he could see lamp posts and traffic lights further down the road. He looked to his side, catching Zeal in a similar state of awe.
“Welcome to my pocket universe!” Crude exclaimed, snapping Ane out of his trance as he snarled and glared at the man. “As you can see, this place is a one-to-one scale of one of your” – He pointed at Zeal – “human cities. Now hidden around the city are three keys, and each of them will require you to complete an objective before you can safely secure them. Once you’ve gathered all three of them, bring them to the centre of the city and I’ll let you kids go home to your brothers and sister. Does that sound good to you?”
What’d sound good would be his fist breaking that arrogant jerk’s face! Ane scowled.
“Wh-why are you doing this to us?” Zeal stuttered, her bushy tail low and her ears drooping.
“Because it’s fun, duh!” His golden eyes glowed brighter as he spread his arms. “Being someone as old and powerful as I am can get pretty boring, so I–excuse me, what?” He stopped short as reality around them shook and distorted. Crude blinked and glared at seemingly nothing. “What do you mean I have to tell them why?”
The air around him shook harder and Crude looked affronted. “Hell no! I’m not gonna change the test to add more ‘drama’! I’ve spent decades planning this out and I’m not about to ruin it just because you think it’s boring!”
After a moment of silence, Crude let out a long, drawn-out sigh, his golden eyes losing their shine. “Fine… but you better keep me out of your inane ‘experiments’ or so help me. I will scream.”
Muttering curses under his breath, he descended from the sky and snapped his fingers, a puff of smoke appearing in his hands. When the smoke cleared, he carried a machine that barely fit in his hands. It held many similarities to the drones from Ane’s world, but it was sleeker, smoother, and as shiny as marble. A soft blue glow hummed from where its propellers would be.
Crude cleared his throat. “Alright, you little crapheads. As I was saying before, I got so rudely interrupted.” He glared at the sky. “This is one of Briggs’ oldest models. It’ll help you locate the keys and direct you towards where you’ll find them and once you do that… well, I was going to make this a surprise, but–” He cut himself off with a grumble and snapped his fingers.
A warped ball of reality burst into existence, its form disfigured and twisted as it expanded and swelled, bigger and bigger it grew before tearing a fissure in reality, revealing a dark void filled with various Pokémon, all of them looking at each other in unease before noticing their onlookers.
“Tada…” Crude raised his hands and shook them unenthusiastically, dropping the drone in the process. “Now take a good and loooong look because those are the ones who are on the line. See that puppy over there? Lost her parents against whom they call The Tyrant, was nursed and taken care of by their local nurse AKA the Chansey, who’s trying their hardest to calm everyone. See their faces? See how afraid they are? See how hopeless they looked? Their lives are in your hands. Isn’t it great? Isn’t it wonderful? You get to prove yourself, prove that you’re just as good as your brother. Isn’t it fun? Isn’t it amazing? It’s delightful–”
The feeling of Ane’s fist sinking into the man’s face was euphoric, but he didn’t dwell on that feeling for too long when Crude stumbled back with a chuckle. You’re a scum,” he said. “An absolutely disgusting monster... Taking people away from their homes, scaring them, hurting them… you’re a disgrace, a freak. Not even my brother would condone such behaviour for even more than a few seconds. I hate you!”
For a second, he thought he saw something resembling hurt flashing in those golden eyes, but he dismissed it when the freak merely grinned and cackled like a maniac. “Hahaha! You’re a riot! Absolutely amazing! If I’d known you would react like this, I would’ve shown this to ya sooner. Hahaha! This is great! Now, this will be a lot more entertaining!” He snapped his fingers, spawning a tablet in his hand before tossing it towards Ane. “Here’s a map of the entire city! Free of charge! Now I’m gonna get going, ‘kay? Have fun messing with the trials. I know I did when I was making them!”
He blinked out of existence just in time for the tablet to sail through the air. It crashed onto the ground, its form still pristine and clean despite the impact.
Ane growled. “Fucking piece of crap,” he said, picking up the tablet and taking a calming breath. He never thought he could hate someone so much. His breaths came through gritted teeth as he turned around, expression softening as he made his way over to the fox.
She held a fearful look on her face as she stared at where the rift had stood. It had vanished the moment Crude disappeared. Zeal jumped before relaxing when she realised it was just Ane.
“Ane,” she said, turning to face him. Her eyes were wide and pleading, and a little frown on her snout. “We-we have to save them! My friends… that human… they… we have to help them!”
Ane held back a sigh as he stared into those bright blue eyes. Curse his weakness for cute animals. “Alright, let’s go and save your friends, Zeal.” The brightened expression on her face was almost worth the pain he knew he would feel.
Don’t get him wrong though, he would’ve made the same decision regardless. He couldn’t very well turn down a request to help anyone. It was mostly the fact that he basically had no choice in this that frustrated him.
But whatever. His shoulders sagged as he glanced around. He would and could power through it like he always had. Ane took a step forward, his expression building into a hard determined glare.
He entered the city with Zeal following behind.
The air of the city weighed with an eerie stillness. What should be a place full of bustling people and noises was now a desolate land with buildings staring down from above. The grey sky above scrutinised him and the motionless false clouds billowed with no winds.
Ane glanced around, his paws gripping the tablet still after so much difficulty doing so. A repetitive hum from the drone echoed through the city, their only reprieve from absolute silence.
From the corner of his eye, Zeal wandered about, barely staying in the drone’s general vicinity. A childlike wonder plagued her very being as she glanced at every little thing, her mouth agape as she took it all in.
They’d been following the drone for several minutes now. If it weren’t for the flashing key icon in the tablet’s map, he would’ve thought it was leading them nowhere. The drome moved slowly, only barely faster than they could walk. He was grateful though as he still hadn’t quite gotten used to his body yet.
The drone, with its non-stop humming, led them down the corner and through a gate where they found themselves in a small section of the city where trees and plants ruled freely. Walking through the fenced gate and down the smooth path, the two found the drone hovering above a statue. Like the world around them, it was grey and built to resemble some sort of bipedal fox. Its whiskers were structured in a way where they looked to be flowing, and in its claws were two spoons. There was also a sign on the podium it stood on, but Ane didn’t pay it much attention.
When he caught its gaze, Ane bit back a shudder. It was like it was staring right into his soul. The creature’s body looked frail but as he stared at it longer, something about it felt off and there. His ears twitched and he stumbled back, something was growling.
It was Zeal.
The animalistic snarl didn’t seem to fit right on her face as she glared at the statue, her fur standing on end as she leaned down, looking ready to pounce. The contrast between her previous self was honestly disturbing and, if not for her facing the glowing–
The statue was… was glowing green!
“Get down!” Zeal yelled and before he could even react, he was tackled down as something flew by him, narrowly missing him as it hit a tree, blowing it into smithereens.
Ane stared at the destruction, mouth agape, his mind barely registering Zeal getting off of him. Th-that almost killed him… He gulped, shakily getting onto his feet and biting back a scream when he saw something coming out of the statue.
Hollow, unnatural green wisps of smoke leaked out of the statue’s eyes and mouth. Its stony features contorted and twisted into a face of agony as more and more green smoke leaked out, coalescing into a suffocating mass of green. A chill ran down his spine when he noticed that it looked like it was screaming. Its body trembled, quivering as something took shape, the mass of green grew and grew, hovering, wavering, shivering as it moved around unbound by the laws of nature. His mind felt heavy, tethered by an unforeseen weight that threatened to crush him.
Yellow, pupil-less eyes glowed through the foggy body, green embers continued to leak and surround its body before finally solidifying.
Ane couldn’t believe his eyes. What was happening? What was this thing and–
“... Quil?” The word came from his lips in a disbelieving murmur.
There the creature stood, its form an eerie replica of his brother. From the shape of his bulb down to the weird mark on his forehead, the wispy green copy of his brother stared into him, his yellow pupil-less glowing with hatred that threatened to burn the world alive.
And when his mouth opened, two voices spoke as one, an echo of unison as they turned to him and Zeal.
Hey there! Here for Catnip. I've read Chapter 1, and here are my thoughts.
Actually, I lied. My first thoughts are actually on the summary. Namely, I think it could do a better job of selling the story. It seems like the only details one really gets out of it is that the protagonist is someone who gets isekaid into a Pokémon's body, retains meta-knowledge about the Pokémon franchise, has his brothers with him, will have a journey that spans the cosmos and there are also deities. Save for the "has his brothers with him" part, this describes a lot of fics. If you'd like readers to be more interested, it'd be beneficial to focus on the parts that set your story apart from others, most importantly the fact that this is (or at least begins) in the mainline universe. I was 100% sure that this was going to be PMD until I read the author's notes. Aside from that, there could also be more detail, since this summary makes very generic promises about the content that don't really give a good idea of what makes this particular story special.
Okay, now on to the actual chapter. I think there's also improvements to be made here. To me, the whole freakout about being a strange lizard / Pokémon now went on for pretty long. It's already a scene that's present in most PMD fics and, I imagine, isekai-into-Pokémon-body fics as a whole, and while there isn't really anything wrong with it in a vacuum, it's one that I imagine active readers of PMDfic might think is treading old ground. However, even with readers new to new body isekais, the scene lingers for a while. It would work better at that length if we were more familiar with the protagonist and had a reason to care about him, but so far it comes before we've learned anything about him.
A strength of this fic so far seems to be the banter between the brothers, which wasn't to my tastes, but I know has an audience. The dynamic of family members in an isekai is a well that to my understanding is not often drawn from, so I would keep with that, not that I would expect you to drop it as one can tell you had fun writing it.
One very minor thing that bothered me was that June didn't mention his tail being on fire until after he'd started freaking out about having it, when I'd really think that a fire right in front of your eyes would be the first thing you'd notice. Another was that the mysterious stranger's laugh ("heh heh") was written out, which kind of deflated the tension - laughter is typically described in narration rather than the dialogue itself since it can look like the character was literally saying the words "heh heh" out loud.
My favorite part of the chapter was the Oak segment. It felt peaceful in contrast to the hectic sections that came before it, and I liked Oak's reflection on his youth. Stories, especially stories similar to this one, are very often from the perspectives of young people, so having an older POV is always interesting.
As a last note, I'm surprised by the names of the brothers. Not in any negative way, just surprised. They, with the exception of June, don't seem like real names that belong to any culture I'm familiar with, but these brothers are implied to be from a world that has the Pokémon franchise. Could they be from some kind of alternate, fantasy version of our world?
Anyway, that does it for my thoughts. I hope this feedback is helpful. Good luck with writing onward, and see you around!
Howdy! Figured I’d come in for the Review Blitz after getting a few reviews from yourself. I tend to focus on Worldbuilding, characters and plot, but will try and cover all bases. I’ll be going through the first three chapters of the fanfic. So with that, here we go!
Okay, I don’t normally do this, but I’m going to go ahead and say something that both caught my attention and bothered me quite a bit within all three chapters. The huge shift in the plot and the wider events of the story to the point that it seemed like I had jumped from one fan-fic to an entirely different one. I’m not sure if that was the point or the intended aim for the fic as a whole, and that totally makes sense given the presence of Crude acting all like a Bored Random Omniscient Being and would completely allow things to make sense… but at the same time it’s such a jarring shift that it kinda stuns me. Even considering looking back at the OP summary. I mean, the first minute, we end up having three brothers ending up in the mainline Pokemon world as Pokemon right? Okay, seems decent enough as a concept. Should have a few funny moments here and there… ooh, some very strange creepy moments are happening to the main protagonist as well? Okay, that’s looking interesting!
Oh wait, this BROB shows up out of nowhere and proceeds to act all like the deal-making devil and throws the brothers to different locations. Or at least, in the case of June, a very different location that what I was expecting. Is this the main world or not? It basically shifts the story from an isekai into the main Pokemon world into some kind of custom PMD world, with the character tying everything together being the very strange Crude, who is completely beyond anything I’ve seen in a Pokemon fic. He comes across as some kind of Q figure only a lot more… dodgy I guess? I feel these transitions would work quite well… if there was a bit more of a build up towards them. Rather than just casually throwing the cast – and us, the readers – into this wild ride almost straight out of the gate.
The characters themselves are an interesting bunch too. On one hand, I do like Evie, Anes and Oak. Evie for her intriguing character and cryptic backstory, especially since she seems to have completed her main story quest for the lack of a better term. Anes, if only for his snarky comments – even if he is easily angered and unhappy with the current state of events. And finally Oak by… well, being Professor Oak. All well and good on that front. On the flipside, I have mixed reactions to June, mainly because he flipflops a lot from being very gung-ho to suddenly nervous as hell. Sudden moodswings I can get with that though. Then there is Quil, who, as one line funnily enough points out, barely makes any presence in the story and seems constantly zonked out save for a few brief moments. It’s something that seems to get dropped very quickly through the chapters when he and Anes vanish into thin air. We don’t learn much about these characters too. Sure, early days in the chapters, but the sudden jumps mean we don’t have time to really start getting to know them.
The writing itself is mostly okay, sticking well to a limited third person perspective. You do get us into each character’s head, especially Evie’s really dang well. Plus, when the description comes in at the right time, we can get a very good picture of the individual locations in mind. There aren’t any grammar issues either, as well as plenty of show don’t tell moments which is always a plus. There are points where some details are easily lost, or there are good opportunities for nice details that are pretty much not embraced. The rattata attack is a good example. We don’t actually see the pack. I want to see their anger and rage on their faces and a glimpse of the action that follows… but we just cut to a sudden transition to a different scene. That was a missed opportunity there that really bugs me, especially since we get Crude coming in. I don’t really know what to think on the guy. Also, this might be me staying up late, but I swore Evie was a Zorua until several paragraphs later which confirmed her as an Eevee… and even then I wasn’t entirely sure. That’s the cost of missing details or trying to infer something but not leaving enough information to give a proper educated guess. It kinda bugged me.
My only other real complaint was the chapter structure. Chapter 2 really could have been split into several smaller chapters, and Chapter 3 could have had the same thing happen. Chapter 1 was just about perfect in size, and I’d actually consider it the best chapter of the three. Namely because it was the most coherent and had a solid base to start things off with some good moments. Chapter 2 and 3 started going on a bit too long and all over the place, leaving me scratching my head for the better part of a couple of minutes.
That being said, the idea for this particular story is a solid concept that is interesting to me. Especially given what the story seems to be inferring. My main criticism to take away from that these sudden events happen way, way to quickly. There should be more build up and development here, with some more details sprinkled in. The jumping around can work well, if we have that little bit of detail and consistency. Especially since our seeming antagonist is just too cryptic and vague at the moment. The PMD style world of somekind does seem like a really good idea for standing on it's own two feet too! Bringing us to the events after a major story and dealing with it's long term aftermath is a nice idea!
It does lead to a wild ride though, and that can be entertaining in it’s own right! Keep on writing, sometimes just going crazy with the writing is the best thing you can do!
Hey hey Shini! Here for Catnip. I guess I technically already read all of this being that I beta’d for you, so I’ll just provide some post-beta-edit thoughts since you technically already got my critiques! I’ll focus on chapter 1 for now :>
So it looks like you gave us a little more of “June calming down” after he realizes what’s going on? It feels a little less sudden than last time, so that’s nice to see! I also think you rewrote the “slash me I must be dreaming” bit too; you do a much better job of indicating how badly he manages to hurt himself this time around.
Once again, I’m tickled by the concept that June and his brothers are coming from a world where Pokemon is a franchise and June has to figure out which version of the franchise they’re in. That part always makes me smile!
As for the “why don’t you just call me brother” thing, I’m still VERY curious about why that’s a gripe for him. I don’t recall that coming up in the most recent chapters I looked over, but revisiting this again I have found myself very 👀👀👀 about it.
I still do believe that at the point where June is gung ho to go adventuring after just being panicked about being a Charmander is just a little rushed. It feels like an improvement from the last time I read, but it might help a little more to sprinkle bits of that “oh there’s so much to do in the Pokemon world!” throughout this bit. You kind of do toward the end, especially around when they have the run-in with Ash, but you might be able to do it a little sooner? Perhaps as part of him calming down?
Ahhhhhh now that I know who Crude is, I was like 😬 when he popped up here. Dude’s here to ruin their lives and they don’t even know it yet.
All in all, it looks like you implemented the notes pretty well! Looking forward to seeing the rest of the finished chapters, and hope to see you around <3
Yeah, my summary's pretty ass. I'm not very good at summarising things and I guess it shows. I'll try and implement some of your advise when I get the time to change my summary.
Okay, now on to the actual chapter. I think there's also improvements to be made here. To me, the whole freakout about being a strange lizard / Pokémon now went on for pretty long. It's already a scene that's present in most PMD fics and, I imagine, isekai-into-Pokémon-body fics as a whole, and while there isn't really anything wrong with it in a vacuum, it's one that I imagine active readers of PMDfic might think is treading old ground. However, even with readers new to new body isekais, the scene lingers for a while. It would work better at that length if we were more familiar with the protagonist and had a reason to care about him, but so far it comes before we've learned anything about him.
The whole freakout's length is quite intentional. The reason for it is because in many, and I mean many of the isekai fics I've read. Nearly none of them have the MC actually freak out for more than a couple paragraphs before something interrupts them. So this whole scene was me trying to see just how someone would realistically panic without anything urging them to dump their panic in like a pursuit or something.
And I think this scene does show parts of June and it'll be kinda important for the later chapters.
One very minor thing that bothered me was that June didn't mention his tail being on fire until after he'd started freaking out about having it, when I'd really think that a fire right in front of your eyes would be the first thing you'd notice.
I mean yeah, having a fire literally lit on your tail should be shocking but at the same time, he was also kinda freaking out about having his body changed and him apparently being in a 'fictional' world. I like to think having a part of your body on fire is a bit tame when you compared it to the fact that the Multiverse as a concept is now suddenly true.
Another was that the mysterious stranger's laugh ("heh heh") was written out, which kind of deflated the tension - laughter is typically described in narration rather than the dialogue itself since it can look like the character was literally saying the words "heh heh" out loud.
Lol yeah, I'll be honest, I wasn't thinking of that when I was writing the 'heh heh' but you did give me an idea for the later chapters... Now to make sure I don't accidentally do it for any other characters.
As a last note, I'm surprised by the names of the brothers. Not in any negative way, just surprised. They, with the exception of June, don't seem like real names that belong to any culture I'm familiar with, but these brothers are implied to be from a world that has the Pokémon franchise. Could they be from some kind of alternate, fantasy version of our world?
Their names actually derived from my brother's and my real names, mostly given as direct translation as I could take it and taken a few creative liberties since Quil's name doesn't have an exact translation (though technically none of our names have a direct translation but his name especially does not sound good if I try to turn it into English).
He comes across as some kind of Q figure only a lot more… dodgy I guess? I feel these transitions would work quite well… if there was a bit more of a build up towards them. Rather than just casually throwing the cast – and us, the readers – into this wild ride almost straight out of the gate.
Hm, funnily enough there was supposed to be a prologue before these chapters but I kinda took it down since I like the sudden and mysterious vibes Crude gives off. I'm not super sure if throwing it back would be a better idea though... maybe if a couple more readers talk about this, I might consider adding it back but I'm vibing more without the prologue then with it.
The rattata attack is a good example. We don’t actually see the pack. I want to see their anger and rage on their faces and a glimpse of the action that follows… but we just cut to a sudden transition to a different scene.
Also, this might be me staying up late, but I swore Evie was a Zorua until several paragraphs later which confirmed her as an Eevee… and even then I wasn’t entirely sure.
You're actually not the first and I'm still kinda confused how Evie gets confused as a Zorua but I'll see if I can make it more explicit that she's not a Zorua... also the vibe you're feeling of her not being an Eevee is right, that's pretty important to a whole bunch about her backstory.
My only other real complaint was the chapter structure. Chapter 2 really could have been split into several smaller chapters, and Chapter 3 could have had the same thing happen. Chapter 1 was just about perfect in size, and I’d actually consider it the best chapter of the three. Namely because it was the most coherent and had a solid base to start things off with some good moments. Chapter 2 and 3 started going on a bit too long and all over the place, leaving me scratching my head for the better part of a couple of minutes.
I'll be honest and say that when I rewrote Chp 1 and 2, I was mostly looking to make them fit chp 3 and yeah, chp 2 got kinda long, longer than I expected but I was too lazy to split them up since I'd have to find the right place to split and fuse chp 3 and 2 then the later chapters... and let's just say I'll only do so if more people complain about it 'cause I'm not too keen on changing it at the moment.
Hey hey Shini! Here for Catnip. I guess I technically already read all of this being that I beta’d for you, so I’ll just provide some post-beta-edit thoughts since you technically already got my critiques! I’ll focus on chapter 1 for now :>
As for the “why don’t you just call me brother” thing, I’m still VERY curious about why that’s a gripe for him. I don’t recall that coming up in the most recent chapters I looked over, but revisiting this again I have found myself very 👀👀👀 about it.
I still do believe that at the point where June is gung ho to go adventuring after just being panicked about being a Charmander is just a little rushed. It feels like an improvement from the last time I read, but it might help a little more to sprinkle bits of that “oh there’s so much to do in the Pokemon world!” throughout this bit. You kind of do toward the end, especially around when they have the run-in with Ash, but you might be able to do it a little sooner? Perhaps as part of him calming down?
Chapter 1: Humble Beginnings (REVIEW, starting with the summary at the top.)
Yeah, maybe everyone would freak out waking up as something else... I'd like to think I would first be exploring and asking questions before freaking out, but I've never been transformed into a scale covered Pokemon before either so its hard to say.
He has brothers with him but are they brothers by blood, people that came with him from the other world, or people that he met from this world that are as close as brothers? Hmmm! *Reads second part of the post* Brothers by blood it is then!
*Begins reading first chapter proper*
Well! So much for a painless transformation....owch
fish-sticks made me smile. reminds me of DBZ abridged's use of crap baskets lol...
Your descriptions of his panic are easy to relate to. Really gets you into the mindset that its you there and not him.
Ah so he has a no swearing rule. Pretty hard not to in an insane situation like that though.
So, once he starts assuming he is dreaming, the passage started reading itself in my mind as a British narrator like on a wildlife documentary. :)
I love how the protagonist seems to think there is a finite amount of choices for where he is at and is trying to guess which one without considering a possibility that the world is based on none of what he is thinking are options. I can hardly blame him for not considering it though given the insane situation he is in.
Dude doesn't like the idea of being a Charmander? Sure, its not a Charizard, but if he can evolve then he will be able to FLY! At least he is not something weak like a Goldeen or Caterpie! I suppose being something so offense oriented can be somewhat disadvantageous though depending on what his goals end up becoming. Too bad he didn't come in as a Ditto. (My word the story would be really hard to properly write if that were the case i think! I'd be curious what a good Ditto fanfic even looks like though)
I guess he is assuming that it was a deity that was responsible for this. A reasonable assumption given the circumstance, I suppose.
Why on earth would he assume that the closest living thing in an alternate world is almost certainly his brother whom he presumably has no idea traveled there with him?? I'm guessing this becomes clear later. *comes back after reading to the end of the chapter* Nope! Its still not clear! What is going on here??
Nifty use of internal dialogue!
Very true! A a real Pikachu would not likely say "What the fuc-"! The court accepts your evidence! However, just because that happened doesn't necissarily mean it is your brother. It could be some random person from a totally different part of your country or maybe a different dimension altogether!
As it turns out, it does indeed appear to be Ane and our protagonist is June. And the blame begins! fatty-chu, dang! So mean! I'm surprized they would bicker at all being in such a crazy situation, but I guess that is kind of the reason Ane started it. Right now I'm going to guess June is the oldest or middle and Ane is the youngest. My mental conception of them right now is that June is 16 if he is the oldest or 14 if he is the middle and Ane is 12.
I would think the chances of Quil being there are astronomically higher at this point now that you actually found Ane. Almost to the point that it is now guaranteed.
Wait a minute, these brothers actually call each other "brother"? As one who grew up with 2 brothers, I find this to be quite odd! Just picture them eating dinner. One says hey brother and they both look up but he was only talked to Ane! I am having a hard time picturing it... I know my own expereinces are coloring my perspective though, so maybe you have also had two brothers and thats how things worked for you?
Well, so far I think Quil is definintely the middle child.
Admittedly, its extremely impressive that June called it. Far moreso than he seems to even slightly realize.
Ok the way he talks about his brothers needing him, I definintely think June is the oldest now. I also now respect him because it means that he cares about his brothers and wants to protect them. Yes, a good brother should, but not all of them out there do.
As for becoming trainers, the only Pokemon I remember from the anime that could be considered a trainer was Mewtwo. So far we have only seen them interact with each other but they can magically understand Japanese. Due to that, I have a feeling they will be able to communicate with more than just each other, but it remains to be seen if they can communicate with humans, other Pokmeon besides themselves, or both. Should be interesting to discover what their goals in this world will be.
Ah a signboard! So where they live IS inhabited by other beings after all! Wow being able to just read Japanese! I bet most of the members of the board who don't know how to read Japanese would love to magically understand it like that. That means that whatever brought them her is most likely intelligent. Being able to magically read that is way too non-random to expect it to have happened randomly. At this point, the involvement of a deity is certainly the best explanation.
WOAH Pallet Town!!! Suddenly the unfamiliar has become WAY more familiar!
ASH!! OH MY!! Wow! This is nuts!! I'm starting to see why the idea of the story appealed to you! The fact that he is pulling Pikachu with a rope means this is near the start of the anime! I have to see where this is going!!
Seeing something so specific to the anime and knowing there is an intelligence at work here, I find his conclusion that he is in the anime to be quite convincing!
Butterfly effect, a reasonably good thing to beware of as the more impact your presence here now has, the less predicitble the events of the world will be going forward. Still, in order to benefit from the predictability, you need to be where the show was taking place. You need to be near Ash.
I have no idea what is going on with Quil. My current theory is that he puts out pollin that somehow makes himself high. I am really not confident in that theory though...
Uh.. a storm is VERY bad for a Charmander if the flame on the tail goes out! I feel like this could have used a little more input from June here before the cut-off as I thought the reason they were running was to make sure they wouldn't get hit by the huge attack from Ash's Pikachu, and not because of the danger to June's life from the rain.
Wait we get a point of view shift to Professor Oak? What? Neat!
Oak reminiscing is an interesting side of him to see.
Good call of June to bring them to Professor Oak's house. Nothing bad EVER happens around there except for Muk later on lol... but seriously, Oak's place gets touched on in the anime ever so often and things are fine and stable around there. Very good move there June!
Certainly makes sense that Oak would be super curious about those 3.
So this hooded figure is presumably the diety that summoned them here and gave them Pokemon bodies. The way the figure behaves though, its like it is not a god or if it is, it has not been one for very long. I currently have no clue where this plot point is going but I'm curious to find out!
So, one thing I want to point out is that I didn't notice a single spelling error, gramatical error, or badly worded sentence! Super nice!
I have to say that I love the use of the horizontal lines in your chapter! It makes it easy to distinguish between changes in scenes.
All of the dialogue and descriptions made it easy to paint the picture of the story in my mind. Great job there.
So far, this chapter does a great job of setting things up. There are so many ways this can go with an enourmous amount of potential for it to be great. I'm really curious to see where things go next.
It does take some time to get to the big reveal with Ash and Pallet town though. Hopefully most readers make it at least that far. If they aren't interested in it by then, its probably not a fic for them I am guessing. Personally, I don't think the story would benefit from making the lead up to Ash be shorter. It needs some time to make the big reveal more impactful and does a good job in that regard I think.
I love how the protagonist seems to think there is a finite amount of choices for where he is at and is trying to guess which one without considering a possibility that the world is based on none of what he is thinking are options. I can hardly blame him for not considering it though given the insane situation he is in.
To be fair, that finite amount does still amount to about a dozen different choices and not to mention, our monkey really loves familiarity and it'd make sense that June would fall back to what is familiar and what isn't.
Why on earth would he assume that the closest living thing in an alternate world is almost certainly his brother whom he presumably has no idea traveled there with him?? I'm guessing this becomes clear later. *comes back after reading to the end of the chapter* Nope! Its still not clear! What is going on here??
Lol yeah, he was mostly desperate for a familiar face (ironic that said face sint familiar at all) and he was mostly lucky in finding that it was Ane and not a random mofo.
Wait a minute, these brothers actually call each other "brother"? As one who grew up with 2 brothers, I find this to be quite odd! Just picture them eating dinner. One says hey brother and they both look up but he was only talked to Ane! I am having a hard time picturing it... I know my own expereinces are coloring my perspective though, so maybe you have also had two brothers and thats how things worked for you?
Alright so the reason why is pretty simple. I think I touched on it a little bit during the Sign scene and will sprinkle little bits of their history in later chapters. But essentially, June and his brothers speak more than one language, mostly English to each other and occasionally some Chinese slang. So whenever Ane or Quil speak to June, they'd call him 'Big Bro' in Chinese. And due to mysterious powers as play, everything they're saying is translated to whoever is around them.
I have no idea what is going on with Quil. My current theory is that he puts out pollin that somehow makes himself high. I am really not confident in that theory though...
Uh.. a storm is VERY bad for a Charmander if the flame on the tail goes out! I feel like this could have used a little more input from June here before the cut-off as I thought the reason they were running was to make sure they wouldn't get hit by the huge attack from Ash's Pikachu, and not because of the danger to June's life from the rain.
To be fair, that finite amount does still amount to about a dozen different choices and not to mention, our monkey really loves familiarity and it'd make sense that June would fall back to what is familiar and what isn't.
Lol yeah, he was mostly desperate for a familiar face (ironic that said face sint familiar at all) and he was mostly lucky in finding that it was Ane and not a random mofo.
That is a pretty accurate assessment.
Alright so the reason why is pretty simple. I think I touched on it a little bit during the Sign scene and will sprinkle little bits of their history in later chapters. But essentially, June and his brothers speak more than one language, mostly English to each other and occasionally some Chinese slang. So whenever Ane or Quil speak to June, they'd call him 'Big Bro' in Chinese. And due to mysterious powers as play, everything they're saying is translated to whoever is around them.
Lmao, that reminds me of Starter Squad's Bulbasaur and that one episode with the poison.
But no as funny as that is, he's not high. That's all I'm gonna say to keep ya guessing.
Was a pleasure to read and review! I hope you found my reactions entertaining.
Ok that's a good point about June being desparate for something familiar. What he wanted most to find there was his brothers. He was already panicked and not thinking clearly from the general insanity of the situation. Ok he gets a pass here from me.
Ok so if Quil and Ane call June Big Bro in Chinese, then what does Ane and June call Quil, and what does Quil and June call Ane? I guess its different depending on the brother? Maybe something like youngest brother or middle brother? Seems king of impersonal though... Ugh whatever! As I read more, it sounds like it will become more clear. That's good enough for me for now.
Ok so if Quil and Ane call June Big Bro in Chinese, then what does Ane and June call Quil, and what does Quil and June call Ane? I guess its different depending on the brother? Maybe something like youngest brother or middle brother?
June and his brothers' relationship are based around my own and we're a little different, but typically in Chinese culture, siblings refer to each other as (Their Name-Big bro or Little Bro) kinda like Japanese honorific where one would say June-nii or Ane-Otoutou except you know, Chinese.
Though in my case, only my/June's little bros would call him Big Bro, and the rest refer to each other as their names. Basically, Quil and Ane would call each other by their names but would usually refer to June as Big Bro, and June just calls them by their names.
June and his brothers' relationship are based around my own and we're a little different, but typically in Chinese culture, siblings refer to each other as (Their Name-Big bro or Little Bro) kinda like Japanese honorific where one would say June-nii or Ane-Otoutou except you know, Chinese.
Though in my case, only my/June's little bros would call him Big Bro, and the rest refer to each other as their names. Basically, Quil and Ane would call each other by their names but would usually refer to June as Big Bro, and June just calls them by their names.
Ah ok. I am not very familiar with Chinese culture, so I appreciate the feedback! Hopefully if any other readers are confused, this little exchange will help them out too. Chinese culture is something certainly not unique to your fanfic, so I can totally understand why you might not go in detail about it in the fic itself at least as far as Chapter 1 is concerned.
Mild Language, Minor Eldritch Things (Creepy Crawly Hands)
Special thanks to Sindrella for beta-ing this!
***
Honestly, June had no clue what he was expecting to see. If someone were to ask him what came to his mind when he thought of Professor Oak and his lab, he’d likely say the three Kanto starters, maybe some Sci-fi-esque tech or whatever sciency stuff that were bound to be around.
Well, believe him when he said that none of those fit what he was seeing (except for maybe the starters bit). The interior of the house left much to be desired. Sure it was homey and comfortable and gave off a safe vibe. But it was pretty boring and dry, what with the plain white wallpaper, the tiled floors, and generally how normal it felt. There was an ugly green couch in the middle of the room, along with a coffee table in front of it and a sofa to the side, there was also a flatscreen TV on the wall, some shelves lined up on one side, a potted plant at the corner and–God, it was so plain. Why couldn't there have been at least one futuristic machine sitting in the corner?
Whatever. He wasn't going to complain if it kept his flame from getting wet. Ah, wasn't that an experience he wished he could forget. The little bite-sized prickling that came with each droplet, the constant mind numbing sensation that spread across his whole body, it was like having a trillion cuts all over and then dipping himself in a bath of soy sauce. And it just… just… He shivered. Point was, he would rather not endure something like that again especially when he considered the fact that his tail flame had only gotten soaked a teeny bit. He couldn't imagine how painful it could be if he submerged the whole thing.
A nudge from a paw snapped him out of his trance and he noticed a towel being handed to him by a yellow furry arm. Muttering a "Thanks." to his brother and drying himself, he hopped onto the couch beside him.
June saw the two, likewise drying themselves, and Professor Oak eying them with a curious look. Clearing his throat, he pointed at the man with a claw, bowing and saying, "Thank you for your kind hospitality, Professor. We're sorry for the inconvenience our presence has caused."
Oak smiled, waving a dismissive hand. "Oh, it's no trouble at all. I couldn't just very well leave you three out there, now could I?"
June nodded. "The name's… June and these are my brothers, Ane and Quil. It's nice to officially meet you," he said, then added a few moments later. "Oh and by the way, I'm a guy." His name was rather feminine so a little clarification would help out a long way, in case this Oak was anything like the games.
"It's a pleasure meeting you three, June, Ane, and Quil." He greeted each of them with a nod before returning his full attention to the Charmander. "May I ask what brings you to my lab? You said you have something you want to discuss?"
Well, here comes the moment of truth. "Have you ever entertained the idea of the Multiverse Theory?" A brief spark of recognition appeared in the professor's eye and he nodded, gesturing for June to go on. "Well, hypothetically, what would you say or do if someone got transported here from another universe?” The professor’s brows furrowed and his lips creased into a neutral expression. “And how would you react if said person came from a universe with no Pokémon, and instead their knowledge of the Pokémon world comes from video games, shows, and comics." That garnered a bigger reaction from the old man, his mouth hung loosely, staring at June with a dumbfounded expression.
"Are you…"
"Yes." June nodded, a grin stretching across his face. "We are that someone! And we would love it if you could help us get back home!"
He could almost feel Ane rolling his eyes at his dramatic flair.
Taking a sip from his glass of water, June watched as the expression on Oak's face flowed from contemplating to intrigue. "That is… quite a peculiar situation."
After his little melodramatic statement, Oak had left, saying he needed a moment to process everything. After about a minute or two, he came back, with glasses full of water. Even though June didn't feel particularly parched, he still appreciated it.
Then the man sat down, hands rubbing his chin as he hummed out in thought. "Am I safe to assume that you three aren't trying to pull a silly prank on me?" he said, giving June am intense look that made him feel more than a little discomfort.
He wasn't sure why he was feeling like that — he had nothing to hide, after all — so he merely nodded. "Yeah, we woke up a few hours ago in Route 1 in these bodies and we kinda freaked out a bit–"
"You freaked out and by a lot," Ane unhelpfully provided.
"–I kinda freaked out a bit. " He threw a glare at the Pikachu before returning his attention to the professor. "Then we almost stumbled into Ash Ketchum before we had to run from the rain."
"I see," Professor Oak mumbled, brows furrowing as he played with the end of his coat. "Alright," he said, standing up. "While I don't fully trust you three based on your claims. Frankly, I can't imagine a world without Pokémon. But as a case like yours isn't truly unheard of–"
Wait, what? June blinked. This universe had other isekai-ees before? He… he hadn't expected that. What? "What… what do you mean by that?"
That got Professor Oak to pause, his eyes locking onto the Charmander who flinched slightly at the sudden attention. It took the combined effort of his will and the fact that Professor Oak didn't seem like he was looking directly at him, to not squirm under the man's gaze.
Thankfully though, before it got too uncomfortable, Oak broke away, hands resting on his sides. "While it isn't common, there have been cases where people and Pokémon from other worlds were stranded in ours."
"Really? So we're not just some one-off special?" He tried to hide the disappointment from his tone with a grin which, fortunately, Oak didn't notice.
The professor rubbed his chin. "Well I wouldn't say that," he said. "We never had any cases where the person who crossed over had subsequently turned into Pokémon. I might say you three are the very first recorded case we've had where all three of you were Poké-fied!"
Poké-fied? Were people turning into Pokemon really that commonplace where there was even a term for it? It would explain why Oak didn't freak out when they met him. He opened his mouth to question that exact topic but was beaten to the punch by his groaning brother.
"Hey, as much as I 'adore' this history lesson. Can we please get to the point?"
Damn it, Ane! He was getting invested in this world's lore! Why did you have to go and ruin everything?
With a hint of redness on his cheeks, Oak rubbed the back of his head, "Right, sorry." Clearing his throat, he faced them with a more serious look. "If I may ask, would you three be fine if I conduct some tests to verify your claims?"
Now it came down to this. This decision, his decision might change how things would look out for them. And all he had to do was say a word. Say the word that would forever change the future… hah, as if this whole bit was anything as dramatic as he was making it out to be. Besides, he had nothing to worry about. They weren't lying so the answer was obvious.
Locking in his answer, he opened his mouth, ready to give in and–
His body froze.
The world around him faded into a realm of dark and white. It was quiet, unnervingly so, he could hear the sound of his blood flowing in his veins, the sound of his scales clinking together as he moved and the sound of his heart beating erratically. Spots of black littered his vision as his eyes darted around. His body refused to obey him. His mind went through several scenarios, working overtime as he tried to come up with something.
What was going on? What was happening? Why couldn't he move? Where was everyone? Why was he in a void devoid of colors? What was going on? What was going on? What was going on?
Help him. Somebody help him. This wasn't fun anymore. He was scared. Frozen. He wanted to leave. Leave leave leave leave leave leave.
Get him out of this hellscape!
Help him!
Help–
The spots around him began to move. Like planets converging on a doomed path to their parent star's corpse.
They mixed. They merged. They reacted. Becoming one. Becoming a single orb that warped the very fabric of reality.
Dark and writhing. It shook him to his very core. He wanted to turn. He wanted to look away. He had to run.
But his body didn't obey, his body never obeyed.
He was stuck, rooted to the void like an added accessory.
And yet, despite his situation. Despite the orb of everlasting consumption. Despite the dread that threatened to consume his realm.
He wasn't afraid.
His mind was numb. His emotions muted. Silenced by an intense drive.
A drive that wanted to satisfy his curiosity.
Reaching an arm forward, he moved.
And the world obeyed.
His face distorted into a frantic grin. He needed to grab it! He needed to have it! That orb! That feeling of familiarity!
Of pain. Of pleasure. Of power. Of change. Of weakness. Of control.
He had to take it.
He had to spread it.
He had to–
Then his realm, his Sol's realm collapsed.
And he was back.
Back in the lab, back to answering the professor's question.
He gasped, ignoring the alerted looks from his brothers and the professor. His eyes darted around, taking in the world one step at a time. Nobody knew.
… nobody knew…
The professor held a concerned look, Ane a worried glance and Quil a look of surprise, they seemed to be saying something but June wasn't in the right state to listen.
What should he do? Should he tell someone? Would they even believe him? His brothers would likely think he was joking and the professor was an unknown. What could he do? What should–
He should hide it. It wasn't like anyone would believe him anyway. Yes, there wasn't anything wrong with not telling them right now. He could tell them later.
So for now, he put the experience to the back of his mind and forced a grin onto his face.
"We'll be fine."
"Age?"
"Fifteen. Turning sixteen in a few months," June said, watching as the professor jotted it down on his clipboard.
Next was Ane. "Fourteen," he said with a dull look in his eyes.
And another down for his report.
Quil stood still, eyes darting to the ground and to his brothers for a moment before saying, "I'm… ten."
After the… incident with that void of dark and white, the professor brought them to his actual lab. Filled with doohickeys and futuristic thingamabobs everywhere! There was an unknown machine there, an unknown machine here. Sure he had to stumble over or around random metal bits and devices on the floor but he was too awestruck by actual flipping solid holograms to even care about how messy Professor Oak's lab was.
June had imagined the test would use one of the machines around them and he was correct! Though when Professor Oak revealed the machine that would help them confirm their claims, it was — oh, how would he put it nicely? — disappointing. Its design was rather simple. And by simple, he meant it was literally just a remote. Sure it had a little screen, with an antenna sticking out, and far too few buttons but that didn't mean it was futuristically cool!
… okay maybe the body-wide beam of yellow light scanning them was pretty cool. But that only let it make it to the 'meh' scale of his coolness meter.
Anyway, where was he? Oh right, the test.
The test itself went by pretty quickly. Oak had the aforementioned laser beam scan them and that was it. When June asked exactly what he was scanning them for, Oak replied with ‘Ultra Residue'. It sounded a lot cooler than what it actually was. See, isekai-ed people, or Fallers as most people called them, had this ‘residue' on their bodies. Ultra Wormholes were rather unstable, they constantly leaked out energy that mixed into the very fabric of whatever universe they appeared in. So whenever something went in, this excess energy would cling onto them and since it had also mixed into the energies of the universe, it could also be used to track and enter wherever said person or object came from.
It was probably a lot more complex than that but that was the jist of it.
Anyway, after Oak did the scan of them, he plopped the remote into a computer and now, all they had to do was wait for the computer to finish its job, uploading and scanning the data. That was the part that was taking a while. June sighed. Figured that even with the Pokémon world being several decades ahead of them in technology, computer loading time still took ages to go through.
So in the meantime, the professor thought it'd be great to do a few body checks of them. 'cause apparently, that was the standard procedure for newly Poké-fied people. He took samples of their blood, scales/fur, and whatever examinations you’d usually find at a clinic.
The results came back to them being the prime example of health. No, he was not exaggerating. Those were the exact words Professor Oak used to describe their health. He would say he was surprised but between the whole turning into Pokémon bit, gaining the ability to speak and read previously unlearned languages, and discovering that there were others like him, having perfect health was nowhere near as shocking when you compared them.
Plus, they even received a snazzy bracelet for all their troubles. Oak said it was supposed to be their 'ID' for Poké-fied people. So, naturally, he picked orange since it blended in nicely with his scales. He mentally snickered to himself. It'd be so fun messing with people who thought he was a wild Pokémon, doubly so when he had nothing to worry about since Poké-fied people couldn't be caught. Orange was also his favorite color so he would've picked it regardless of whether or not he could trick someone with it.
"Full name?"
"June…"
And with that, the rest of the hour went by rather fast and by the end of it, they had their personal information recorded and ready to be used. According to Professor Oak, they would be needed as the FHS, short for Fallers Helpers Society, would need a few months before they could begin the search for their home.
So they were staying here for a while. Ane didn't take it well and Quil was as silent as ever, still staring at empty space like it had all the answers to the universe. It was a bit unnerving...
He, on the other hand, was fricking ecstatic. Like, they were going to be in the Pokémon world for an unquantifiable amount of time! If he played his cards right, he could potentially find a way to become a trainer and live every child's dream of becoming a Pokémon champion!
… although he didn't know outright whether Poké-fied people could become trainers, he was willing to put his pessimistic thoughts aside to think of a few plans that could convince the professor.
A nagging beeping noise rammed its way into his mind, knocking away his thoughts and snatching him back into reality. He blinked, wincing at the constant ringing in his head. Thankfully, Oak helped alleviate the pain by hopping onto the computer and silencing the notification.
"Alright, let's see what we have…" Oak muttered and not for the first time did June hate how short his new body was. He really wanted to see the whole process, but unless he was willing to jump onto the table, he was not going to get a good look at the data otherwise.
Sighing, he turned to his brothers who each held a bored look on their faces. "Pretty sweet bracelet, eh?" June said, flashing and shaking the accessory.
"I guess..." Ane rolled his eyes. "Ugh, this is gonna take forever! "
"Hey, look on the bright side. We're living every Pokémon fan's dream here! I mean, sure we're not humans but at least we're in a world we know instead of a random fantasy place."
Ane merely groaned and slumped onto the armrest.
Welp, that didn't do anything. And he doubted he needed to cheer up Quil since… he was still staring off into the distance. Just what was he thinking about?
June shook his head, shrugging off the mystery and returning… huh, was it him or did Oak look a bit worried?
Oak sat there, staring at the screen and chewing on his lips. Then as if feeling June's gaze on him, he turned and straightened his face. "There appears to be a problem…"
A problem? June raised a brow. "What's up?"
Oak sighed at the puzzled look on June's face. "Please take a step back." He pressed a few keys on his computer before a flat, translucent, blue screen appeared above their heads, flashing white for a moment before revealing a picture of them.
Hm. He didn't see what the problem was. The pictures looked perfectly fine.
Then another picture took their place, this time depicting a young boy enshrouded in a cloud of blue dust and sparkles. Then another took its place, this time showing a Pokémon with a similar aura of blue dust and sparkles. Then another and another and…
Oh, he saw the problem now.
"We don't have Ultra Residue…" June trailed off, eyes widening as his mouth hung open loosely.
"What? What the hell do you mean we don't have Ultra Resi-what's it!" Ane exclaimed, jumping off the chair and pointing an accusatory paw at the screen. "This has to be a mistake! We–it can't–"
Ane's words faded into obscurity. His mind flooding with questions. What did this mean? Why didn't they have Ultra Residue? Professor Oak said that anything that had passed through Ultra Space would have it; objects, people, Pokémon. So why didn't they? Why didn't they have it? Why were they different? Did it have something to do with that white void he found himself in earlier?
Amidst the sea of questions, one constant question resurfaced and dwarfed them all.
Could they not go home?
A mixed torrent of emotions followed through, seeping into his systems and threatening to tear his mind apart at the constant back-and-forth. Unsettling questions crept into his mind, rocking him to his very core.
Did he want to go home? Of course, he did, what kind of silly question was that? Uncertainty filled his answer.
Did he want to stay? Of course not, that'd be silly no matter how fun it would be. Only a hint of truth covered his answer.
Why did he want to stay? He had no answer.
Why did he want to leave? He had no answer.
His brothers were here, he didn't have much, other than an obligation, to return home to. He had no friends – not anymore – and no other bonds with anyone else.
But was it right of him to rob his brothers of their rightful futures because he wanted to have fun? What about their dad? Would he be distressed at their sudden disappearance? And was he currently drowning in despair?
June swallowed thickly, gagging at the bitter taste in his mouth. He hated those thoughts. He needed to say something. Think of a plan. Force something to come out.
He bit his lip, the slight pain jolting him back and feeding him the confidence he needed. "Professor, is it really that strange for a Faller to not have Ultra Residue? Isn't there some other method that could've brought us here? A Legendary? An unknown deity? Someone failing a magic spell? Please, Oak! We're not lying when we say we're from another world! We're not! I promise you! We're not…"
Please let this work. Please let his pitiful tone worm its way through the professor's old heart. He needed to give them hope. He couldn't let them down. He couldn't. He couldn't.
"I believe you."
June blinked and he faced the professor with a puzzled stare. "Yo-you do?"
Ane kept quiet, stepping back and letting his brother take the lead.
Professor Oak nodded with a careful smile. "Only a heartless monster wouldn't believe you after that display," he said, shrugging. "This case has been getting weirder and weirder the longer I observed it, so it wouldn't be too out of the realm to believe a Legendary could be behind this."
Professor Oak was agreeing with him? The Professor Oak agreed with him?
But… but that didn't… why would he… why? Didn't he say he wouldn't believe them until they had the evidence to back them up? Did their desperation play that much of a role in convincing him?
He didn't understand. He didn't really. But he was willing to let go and accept. They'd already convinced him. Now what? The FHS couldn't help them search for a way home without Ultra Residue, they were pretty much useless now… which meant the only option left was…
His eyes widened and he covered his mouth, muffling the sharp gasp escaping him. "Say, professor. Would it be too crazy to ask if we could look for a way home?" June said before quickly elaborating upon noticing the professor's questioning gaze. "Without the Ultra Residue to trace back, the FHS can't really help us much in sending us home. So I was wondering if we could become trainers and look for the Legendary that sent us here ourselves."
"Trainers? Hm… I'm not so sure–"
“If you're worried about us, we have knowledge that can give us a headstart to any exams you throw at us," June pointed out.
"Hey, what are you–" Quil in all his glory cut off Ane's protest before it could begin, once again showing his presence to the audience.
"Yeah, I can cook and if there’s anything else we need to know, we can just learn it from whatever’s available,” Quil said.
"Yeah! We can–wait… what do you mean you can–" June started, turning to Quil but his brother ignored him to continue talking.
"If you guys can send ten-year-olds out in the wilderness with nothing but a Pokémon and some survival equipment, then I'm sure… no I'm very sure that we can do it too, especially considering that we could potentially talk to other Pokémon.”
The silence was suffocating and he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was this really Quil? Were all those empty gazes secretly some form of thinking-increasing magic? And the craziest part was that Professor Oak was considering it! Quil had managed to convince him with fewer words than June ever could. What on Earth was going on here?
June took in a breath. He could feel the headache brewing…
Y'know what. Nope, he was not gonna question things anymore. It was obvious he wouldn't be getting any answers anytime soon. So from now on until further notice, he was not gonna question anything until something drastic happened.
With that mental promise set up, he tuned back just in time to hear the professor sigh. "If that is what you three really want then–"
"H-hey! I didn't agree to this!" Ane shouted, fed up with being ignored and interrupted. "Why the hell are we doing this? We–”
And June was going to put a stop to this before Ane ruined everything. He covered the Pikachu's mouth with a claw, glaring at him. "Shut up. This is our best chance at getting home. If you want to go back home, we have to do this. We have to look for the Legendary that sent us here!" he whispered harshly, neglecting to mention that this supposed ‘Legendary’ wasn't even a guarantee either, what with the multiverse theory and all.
The Pikachu glared back, not backing down without a fight.
Sighing, his face softened. "Look, I don't like this either." That was a lie. "But it's either this or stay in this world forever. You have friends and whatnot back home, don't you?" Ane nodded. "And so do I and–hey don't look at me like that. I have friends." Slightly miffed, he turned away with a huff before remembering the audience in front of him. He let out a sheepish chuckle, scratching his cheek. "Uh, you were saying?"
The professor's face creased up with a worried look. "You know, it's fine if you don't want–"
"No, no. We can do this. We can do this! We can… no need to worry about us. We'll be fine."
Happy grin. June. Happy grin. Give him your best smile.
The professor didn't look entirely convinced but he didn't push any further. "If you're sure then… alright. Let's get you three ready for adventuring. Fortunately, we already have most of the paperwork done so this will be quick."
And with that, June did a mental victory dance.
"Remember to call me when you reach Viridian City," Oak said, watching as they leave with a smile.
When he first met the three, he was ecstatic of course. It wasn't everyday he'd met a Poké-fied person, and having three of them in his lab had him barely holding down his enthusiasm. He wanted to ask them so many questions: What was it like? How did it feel? Was their transition smooth? How did it even happen? And so much more.
But that excited curiosity was curbed when he heard their story. It brought him back to reality, reminding him of where he was. After hearing that story, he was skeptical of them. Even after excusing himself and retrieving a pokéball with a Pokémon linked to his mind and checking them for lies, he was still unsure despite their full honesty. A world without Pokémon? Such a thing was inconceivable. The Pokémon Professor could hardly comprehend the idea let alone, believe in a world where humans and animals were the only beings on the planet.
But when he gathered their data with the energy detector, he decided to scan more than necessary, he wasn't sure why he did it but he was glad he had as the results were… concerning.
Ultra Residue. Inconclusive. As seen by the normal picture of the three.
Infinity Energy. Inconclusive. As noted from the lack of distinct energy inside them.
Type Energy. Inconclusive. As observed when he compared them to other Poké-fied people, they held barely any difference from other victims.
It was only the final data he'd received that forced him to a halt.
Aura. Inconclusive.
He couldn't get those words out of his mind the moment he saw them.
He had checked the systems, redoubled his findings, and tried everything he could think of. But it all came back to…
Inconclusive.
Everything, whether living or not, had Aura. The trees, the rocks, Pokémon, people, Poké-fied people, even the very clothes he wore had Aura.
… and yet, those three… those three children had thrown everything he knew, everything he studied about back into his face.
A loud voice had screamed in his mind then. He wanted to understand them, their culture, their world's history. He wanted to learn more. He wanted to learn everything about them!
But he didn't…
He made a lot of mistakes in his time alive and he liked to think he'd learned a thing or two from his mistakes. He wouldn't push another person away because of his impulsive drive to learn, not again. These children needed someone to support them in a world where they weren't supposed to exist. And he was willing to put his researcher side away in order to help someone in need.
Once the three were out of his house, he smiled as he pulled out a pokéball. "Alright, Tutor. Keep an eye on them."
With that command, his Pokémon blinked away.
"And we're off! To see a land unknown~" With a bounce in his steps and the pokéballs jiggling in his belt, the Charmander snapped his claws and raised his arms to the sky. "This is it! We're actual freaking Pokémon trainers! This is so cool! I mean, technically, we still gotta get to Viridian City first to register but this is close enough!" Nothing could ruin his day.
"Ugh, why do we have to be trainers?"
Yup, nothing could ruin his day.
"Hey, since it's gonna take a while before we can register. What kind of Pokémon do you think we should catch in the meantime? I'm thinking of Pidgey. Pidgeot, I've read, can move faster than the speed of sound. Super speed and flight are so cool, and considering that we're operating on anime rules instead of game rules, there's so much we can work with!"
Silence took hold of their surroundings the moment he finished his sentence. Empty. Quiet. Peaceful. Calm. Only the sounds of their feet walking and the grass swaying in the wind could be heard.
…
God, just what the hell was that white void? Why are we even here for? Ugh, try not to think about the possibility of reincarnation and how that meant my brothers and I died in our sleep…
…
Aah! Bad thoughts! Baaaad thoughts! Leave him alone! He winced, looking for a distraction before taking note of his brothers' gloomy expressions.
Fine. Guess he shouldn't ignore the situation any further.
"Come on, guys. Stop acting like thaaat~'' He nudged them with a grin on his face. "We're in a world where children can catch and beat up gods so stop acting like what we're doing is impossible~"
"I'll feel better if you yourself would stop acting like that," Ane muttered, not looking his brother in the eye.
"Hm… how about you, Quil? What Pokémon do you wanna catch?" He moved on to the Bulbasaur, not at all discouraged by his brothers' lack of a reaction. "Come on, you were so talkative earlier."
Quil sighed. "Fine. If you want my thoughts then I say we wait till Route 22. If we're going to beat Brock then a Mankey would be good against him."
"Do you think Brock's even gonna be the gym leader? 'cause I'm pretty sure his dad takes his place after Ash fights him."
"Oh… oh huh, you're right."
"I know! And I just realized that!" June groaned. "Now we won't know what his strategy will be. I mean, yeah he's probably gonna still use Rock-types but Brock's like all rock hard so how would his dad be? Stone cold?"
And most damning of all, what should his one-liner be after beating the gym?
Ah, so much to consider!
"Come on! We gotta catch that Pidgey now if we're gonna figure out a strategy!"
"Wait, let's do that after I catch a Rattata," Quil said.
"Huh? Why Rattata? I thought you said you wanted a Mankey?" June raised a brow.
"Yeah, but a Rattata could help in–"
"Hah! Help in what? Being fodder? They're like the most useless Pokémon you could ever catch," June said, dismissively waving a claw. "I mean, there was a reason why Youngster Joey was a meme, y'know. Rattata sucks, period. They're dumb, they're disgusting ugly pests and I don't think I'd ever… Why the hell are you guys scooching away from me? Is there something behind… Oh… oh frick… I see where this is going…"
Did he dare look back?
He turned around and immediately turned back, face paler than a sheet of paper.
Nope nope nope nope. He was getting out of here. He was not going to fight off an entire pack of rats.
But then again, this was the animeverse, maybe if he… "Hey, idiots! Everything I said was one hundred percent true and you know it! Try catching me if you can, suckers!" And to add to his taunting words, he stuck out his tongue.
Ignoring his brothers' shocked gasps, he ran as fast as he could, knowing that his brothers were more than capable of escaping before things went bad.
Things went bad.
No, scratch that. Things went terrible.
It was the worst, the absolute fricking worst. He groaned, nursing a bite mark on his side as he leaned against a stump. Why did he think that was going to go well? Ow. He could barely think over the pain radiating from the bruises and cuts on his body.
He glanced off to his side, Ane sat against a tree. He didn't look as bad as June did but he knew Ane had taken some damage judging by the way he winced and cringed, and Quil lay spread across the grass, exhaustion marring his bruised figure.
He messed up.
"Well, that didn't go as planned." June shrugged, resisting the urge to wince.
"Didn't go as planned?" Ane muttered, his voice holding a dangerous tone that threatened to stab him. "You call pissing off an entire colony of Pokémon a plan?"
"Langua–"
"No! This is the reason why I didn't want to be a trainer! I knew something like this would happen! This is all your fault!" Ane shouted, getting up with his paws balled into fists as he stalked his way to his injured brother. "You made them–"
"Hey, hey calm down. I'm… I'm still hurt…"
"You think I give a damn if you're hurt!" he spat out, raising his fist menacingly.
"Quil… little help here… buddy?"
The Bulbasaur turned his head to give him a deadpan stare. "Long live the king."
Well… he was doomed.
"Wait wait wait, don't–"
Ane brought his fist down.
But it never connected.
Instead, a hand grabbed hold of the paw, stopping its collision with his face. June blinked as Ane let out a startled noise and he stared at the hand with morbid interest. The hand wasn't attached to an arm instead it was coming out of a hole in reality.
"What the fu–"
"Now now now, little Ane. We can't have any of that dirty language here, can we?" A voice giggled from behind June and he jumped, all the aches and pain vanishing from his body as he turned to face the source of the voice.
Staring back at him was a man wearing a hood that covered his entire being. In the void where the person's head should be were two brightly glowing eyes made of gold scanning his very soul.
June glanced back at Ane, watching as the hand let go of Ane and scampered its way to the hooded man.
What the hell was going on?
The hooded person floated down — They were floating! — and accepted the hand's request to rejoin its master. Once reattached, the hooded man tossed their hood aside, and with their being now fully exposed to the sun's rays, June's heart hammered in his chest as he stepped back.
"Who… who are you?" June asked. He needed to know. He needed to know who this was and why… Why did this person have his human face?
With a grin etched onto the being's stolen face, he snapped his fingers and flaming letters appeared above his crimson-glazed hair, blitzing through several letters as he said, "I'm known by many names throughout the Infini-verse. Dark Lord, monster, demon, and other dark and grimy curses but my friends call me Crude. It's a pleasure to meet you, Creator." The flames above his head changed to copy those words, their heat providing warmth that left him uncomfortable.
Creator? What did he mean by that?
"Exactly what it says on the tin, Creator."
Did he just–
'Read your mind? Yes, I did~'
June screamed, clutching his head. "Get out of my head!"
"If you say so," Crude said, switching his attention to the other two, his golden eyes twinkling in mischief. "So you two are Quil and Ane. I've been dying to meet the ones he calls his brothers. What do you think of your sweet little ol' nephew?" He chuckled, swaying to the side and dodging Ane's failed pathetic punch.
"Stay away from us, you stupid impostor!" Ane shouted with disgust marring his face.
"Oh, there's a joke in there that you three wouldn't know for a lo~ong while." His grin reached his eyes as he dodged another punch, making his way over to Quil. "Hey–"
“Stay away from me." Quil glared at the hovering man who merely shrugged and floated away.
"Oof, tough crowd. Am I right?"
June held his head with a shut eye, arms blocking the overly aggressive Pikachu from making a mistake. "What are you?" He addressed his flying doppelganger with a bit of difficulty.
"Somebody that you used to know~" He cleared his throat, snapping a top hat into existence and pulling a clipboard out of said hat. "Alright, I've had my fun. Let's get down to business." He gave them a grin that held teeth that fit better if they were on a shark. "'How do you know whether your life is a lie?' Oh wait, that's the wrong question. No need for any existential crises at the moment." He tore the clipboard in half, crumpled it up into a ball, and chucked it back into the top hat which subsequently shattered into a million pieces and bled into the ground.
"Anyway." He snapped a piece of paper into reality. "I'd like you to sign here and here, please."
Please stop… His head hurt from trying to comprehend the last thirty seconds. "What?"
"You three are looking for Pokémon, no? Well, I'm giving you the sweetest package deal of not one, not three, heck not even five, but two, TWO, awesome and rare Pokémon completely free… provided you do the manual work."
"I'd… huh?"
Crude groaned. "Right, I just remembered how slow you can be sometimes." He snapped away the paper, his eyes dimming slightly. "Look, it's simple. You complete some tasks for me and I'll give you two Pokémon as a reward," he said, all the while dodging Ane's futile attempts at hitting him.
"I…" What… what was this thing talking about? Two Pokémon for tasks? The hell was this? Some sort of main quest-type bullcrap? An-and was his doppelganger's hand covered in a wreath of green flames? What the? Did this 'Crude' guy think he'd be desperate enough to get into some kind of deal with a person who literally called himself a demon lord? This had 'Trap!' written all over it.
June growled, swatting away the hand in front of him. "We don't need your help, you… you… faker."
But instead of looking mad or laughing at his rejection, Crude merely gave a dangerous quiet smile that sent chills down his very soul. "Oh… that's just perfect~ Too bad~ that wasn't a real request."
He showed a wider grin that kept widening and widening and–
The image burned into his retina. Its grin threatened to split the being's face in half as the world around them faded into a crimson abyss.
His muscles locked, an invisible force holding him down, compelling him to look, to watch as portals opened up beneath his brothers, sucking them in as he hung in the air, helplessly.
Ane! Quil! He wanted to scream but he couldn't get his body to obey as a single golden eye floated in front of him, mumbling words that hurt to hear as a snap reverberated in the world and his vision turned blank.
"Have fun, Champion." The stolen voice spoke.
Children's laughter filled the calm night. A group of Pokémon sat around a campfire, smiles dancing on their faces as they told stories and cracked jokes, relishing by the warm fire.
The Purrloin, the daughter of the local guards and the eldest of the group stood on her hind legs, forelegs spread wide as she spoke in a low tone. "... it was then the Shinx turned around and saw the monster… a tall creature made entirely of shadows stood there with an orb in hand. The Shinx screamed as the ball connected with his head, dematerializing him and trapping him in to do the monster's every bidding."
Shocked gasps filled the audience as they looked at each other in worry. The adult sitting by, a Luxio, shook her head in amusement, a small grin on her muzzle as she watched the children have their fun. To think she could bear witness to a sight like this after all those years of constantly living in fear.
There were times when she still believed everything was a dream, imagining that she would one day wake up in the cave she'd spent most of her life in as she hid from The Tyrant, hoping so dearly in her heart that they wouldn't end up like her late partner.
She blinked away the tears, shaking her head and banishing those thoughts. She needed to stay in the present. All of her worries and fears wouldn't help her one bit in assuring little Shez's future.
"Hey, Shez's mom!" the Purrloin called out, getting her attention. "Can you tell us the story of how Evie defeated The Tyrant? Shez said he wants to hear it even though he's a big baby."
Shez, her cute little kitten, protested with a small flush on his cheeks. "I'm not a baby, Gild! I can use Spark! Mom says only babies can't do that and I can!"
"You'll always be my baby, Shez." She patted him on the head, ignoring his embarrassed "Mom!" as she ruffled his fur before facing the group. "Are you sure you want that story coming from silly old me? I'm not sure I could do her story justice."
As expected, cries of outrage erupted from the group.
"But you're the best storyteller, Shez's mom!" a Gligar exclaimed.
"Yeah, Miss Luxio. My dad isn't anywhere near as good at telling stories like you can," said the bright Emolga.
As more and more protests piled on, she relented with a sigh, smiling at the group. "If you really wanna hear it then who am I to turn down such lovely faces?" She giggled. "What about you, sweetie? You're sure you can handle it?"
Shez nodded vigorously, having already chosen a seat closest to her.
"Alright, alright," she said. "Gather around, children, and listen to the tale of The Tyrant's End, a true story of our brave hero, Evie..."
Her voice enraptured the kids as the moon cast its light onto the small village below.
Somewhere deep within the forests of Troublewood and an hour away from the nearest village stood a lone building. It was a cosy little thing with a roof of thatch and walls made of the finest wood around, it stood in a small clearing where the moon freely shone its calm brilliance below.
Peering into the small house, a small black fox, a Zorua could be seen sleeping on a straw bed, her ears twitching every so often, blissfully unaware of her surroundings.
Lying her head on a bed bigger than her younger sister, Evie, with her eyes dull and wrinkled from the nightmares haunting her, stared into the ceiling with a glossy look. Stifling back a yawn, her mind was fuzzy and tired yet she couldn't find the strength needed to sleep.
A minute passed, then another and another and another. The moonlight outside was muffled by passing clouds, the light dimming as the brown vixen let out a heavy sigh.
Life was pain.
Her ear flicked, twitching as she moved her head, barely taking in the world around her. She was tired. No – she muffled another yawn – she was exhausted. Yet, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't fall asleep. Too many nightmares. Too many voices calling out her mistakes, her failures, her–
She caught herself with a rough shake of her head, accidentally biting her tongue in the process, the pain and warmth that spread further stimulated her mind, jolting her even more awake. Groaning, Evie groggily got onto her paws, eyelids heavy as she made her way outside. A nice walk in the woods should help clear her mind.
Taking in a breath of fresh air, the soft breeze of the night brushed against her fur and her mane swayed under the moonlight. There was a fruity scent waning around her, greeting her as she trudged past a particularly overgrown bush and down a path only known to her.
Feeling the grass beneath her paws and the glimmer of light peeking from the leaves above, memories of a past long ago guided her movements and led her down a path. The path held no discernible differences from many others. No particular groves of trees, no particular landmark. Hell, it wasn't even paved, it was simply there, hidden in plain sight.
Only she knew where the path led, a path that brought memories both bitter and sweet. It opened up to a large field where a river split the land in half, pooling into a lake that sparkled in the moonlight. Stars twinkled high above as the gorgeous moon bathed the land in its pale glow. It looked just as beautiful as it did all those years ago.
Something pricked her eyes and she glanced around, fighting back the memories that threatened to spill into her vision. On the other side of the land, she spied a small crater, now overgrown with grass. That was where she'd first failed her attempts at conjuring a Shadow Ball. The resulting explosion was painful but nowhere near as painful as the memory of her mother’s praises. How her praises never failed to cheer Evie up, how her failures never hurt more than a couple minutes, how everything had felt so simple back then.
A cold sensation gripped her paws and she wiped the tears that blurred her vision. She found herself standing ankle-deep in the lake with no memory of when she’d done so. A glint in the lake caught her eyes and she stared, the amber eyes of her reflection stared back, full of contempt and anger at the pitiful and disgraceful being standing before them.
Cracks rippled through the lake as she brought her paw down, breaking the stoic and quiet facade that masked the truth.
It had been months since she'd dealt the decisive blow against him. It… was nothing short of euphoric. The chains that had shackled her shattered, bringing forth a new wave of peace and joy into her broken state. Everyone was happy.
Perry, Rower, the citizens of Troublewood, her sister… they were overjoyed when she delivered the news. A new era had arrived, one no longer bound by fear and pain.
Yet, despite their happy faces, despite how thankful they were, despite the love and praise they threw at her, she didn't feel anything. In the following weeks, she helped them adjust, helped them learn, helped everyone who needed her. Everyday, she went through the motions with a false smile on her face, each action feeling heavier than the last, the nightmares that lingered definitely didn't help with that regard. Sometimes she didn't feel like leaving her bed, sometimes she didn't feel like moving, sometimes she didn't feel like doing anything.
Days had passed by like a blur and she would often find herself staring into the sky, hours having gone by without her realising. Why did she feel so numb? That was a question that had plagued her for the two months of peace that came.
And it was only during a calm night, sitting by a campfire when she found the answer.
She was bored.
The reason why everything felt repetitive, why it was so dull, was because she was bored. She was bored of the peace. The peace that she and many other had fought over a decade for.
She was bored with it.
Blood, sweat and tears. Countless of lives and deaths. The neverending pressures and pain of everyone, of everything bearing down on her shoulders. She had missed it.
She'd missed the pain that followed her everywhere.
At first, Evie was disgusted at herself, at the thought that had come. She wanted everyone to suffer once more just because she was bored! Why couldn't she have just been satisfied with the peace and be happy with it? Why couldn't she just be happy? Why?
Why did she have to be such a freak?
Water splashed all over her figure but she didn't care enough to notice. Her eyes narrowed and she glared, baring her fangs at the creature in the lake.
Why couldn't she have just been happy with the results? Why was she so fucking selfish? She should be happy! She should be! So why wasn't she? Why was she hiding herself from everyone else? Why did she have to be such a greedy and disgusting twat?
Why?
Why did everyone continue to look up to her as if she was perfect? Why did they love her so much? Why did everyone have to look so happy when they saw her?
Why couldn't they see the weak fool she really was?
She didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve any of it. Not when she couldn't–not when she had failed him.
Why couldn't she have been strong enough to protect the ones she loved? Why was she only strong enough after she’d failed? Why was she so useless?
Tears trickled down her cheeks, rippling the lake as they fell.
Nobody knew the pain and anguish she felt all those years ago. They wouldn't understand. None of them would. Not even her sister.
And in the end, none of it mattered, not anymore. She was strong now. Stronger than anything in this forest. Not even the ancient dragons that hid here could dare hope to challenge her now. She would bear the pain like she always did.
All she needed was for her sister to be happy. Her sister’s happiness was everything to her. All her problems didn't matter as long as her sister was fine and happy.
Cleaning her sorry self off, she cast one final glance over the land, disgust muddying her expression. What used to be a beautiful place was now tainted by her pathetic weakness. Tch, she was such a disgrace.
She turned to leave, ready to try and get some rest before the day began and–
A flicker of light.
There, far off in the distance, she could see yellow light, dancing, wavering. She blinked, rubbing her eyes with a paw to make sure she wasn't seeing things. No, it was still there. What was that? A flame? Was someone out there? That couldn't be right. There shouldn't be anyone living there, not at the moment, she had requested it as such. Plus, she couldn't make out any smoke so it wasn't from any open fires.
A Ghost-type maybe? Again, not likely, their flames were usually purple, blue or pink, never the standard flame. So it couldn't be that.
But then what could it–
Her blood ran cold.
A human.
It could be a human.
She shook her head. No, that couldn't be right. None of them would ever dare venture into Troublewood when he showed up. He–The Tyrant had succeeded at blocking any humans from entering the forest, even the elites and aces stood zero chances against him. They wouldn't come in. They wouldn't…
But what if they did? What if they knew The Tyrant had died and were hoping to expand their hold onto the forest? Her heart stammered a beat and she squished the ugly thoughts that breached her mind, the ones that felt pleasure at the thought of them knowing, the actions that would be taken when they reported their fin
dings, the fights that would ensue, the–No, stop it!
She would never want something like that! She’d never forgive herself if she let innocent Pokémon suffer because of her wants, and her sister…
Okay, she made her decision. Whatever that light was, she would discover the source of it. If it was what she thought it was then she’d take proper actions against them and if needed, kill them. Hopefully, it would never come to that but she wouldn't freeze up if she had to.
“Alright, head in, check it out and see if it needs immediate attention. If not, then scold whoever the fuck is out so late,” she muttered under her breath, her legs tensing up before she cleared the field in the blink of an eye. She glanced around, zipping from tree to tree as she honed in on the brightening light. The woods grew thicker the deeper she went, bushes and overgrown roots obscured the land, forcing her to slow down lest she had to waste more energy healing herself.
Thankfully, there were a couple less cluttered paths available and she stalked them down, leaping over anything she couldn't walk over until finally she rounded a line of oran berry trees and reached the light where it was the brightest. It came from a small field, a little opening with nothing too special.
Her eyes scanned the opening and immediately, she found the source of the light. The sight made her heart leapt to her throat and she found it hard to breathe.
There was a Charmander on the ground, lying dead to the world with their soft breathing being the only indication of life. She couldn't believe her eyes. A Charmander. Here? That made it all the more credible that a human was nearby! But how? How could a human have come here? That shouldn't be possible. Perry had said they were still in an ongoing war. So they couldn't be. They couldn't!
Then perhaps they were abandoned? She almost scoffed at the thought. Charmanders were incredibly popular and sought out back when… She shook her head. It just wasn't possible.
But then how could a Charmander be here if not for a human setting camp nearby? She looked around, eyes scrutinizing every inch of the place for… nothing she could see, no tracks, no footprints, not even a whiff of a human’s salty odour. However, she didn't dare let her guard down. Just because she couldn't see them didn't erase the possibility of a human hiding somewhere.
Her ears flicked forward and her eyes lingered on the yellow flame at the tip of the Fire-type’s tail. Casting one final glance at her surroundings, she crept forward, muscles tensed, ready to bolt or fight if what she was about to do was incredibly stupid.
As she got closer and closer, a new feeling crawled into her range, pressing against her with its weight. A shiver ran down her spine and she froze, eyes locked onto the Charmander that felt like the void.
Pain pounded his head the moment he returned to consciousness. He clutched his head with a claw, groaning as prior memories flashed through his mind. Opening his eyes, he stood up, looked around, and promptly screamed like a little girl.
June scrambled back, arms, legs and tail flailing. His eyes wide, full of panic as his back pressed against the bark of a nearby tree, the sensation of the wood sticking was nothing compared to the fricking heart attack assaulting him. Crap crap craap! “Don't eat me!” he squeaked out, arms covering his face for the inevitable attack. “My flesh is squishy and tainted! It wouldn't be–be…”
He heard laughing. No bites, teeth or claws, just…
Laughter? He lowered his arms, seeing the Pokémon that had previously loomed over him, chuckling, giggling like a little schoolgirl after being told a joke from her crush. Momentarily dumbfounded, he stared in silence at how human it–she? looked.
The Pokémon before him was massive, easily over twice his size and probably near the height of his human self. She resembled a fox, albeit a massive one and she had a light cream mane that was splayed over and yet didn't look as messy as it should look. Her mane trailed down her neck, reaching her withers and meshing well with the fur around her neck, much like an Eevee’s. Though, unlike an Eevee, there was an odd gash of red fur that streaked down from top to bottom and was the same shade as blood.
Huh, was she one of the Pokémon Crude said he was going to catch? If so, then she definitely ticked all the boxes of an interesting mon for an isekai.
Snapping himself out of his stupor, June jumped onto his feet, his cheeks flaring red as he pointed at the Pokémon. “He-hey, stop laughing at me!” he shouted, yet much to his dismay it only made the vixen laugh harder.
“S-sorry,” the fox said between giggles, her fluffy tail swaying slowly behind her. “I just wasn't expecting a reaction like that.” She chuckled, muffling her muzzle with a paw. “Heh, Arceus, I needed that.”
“We-well,” he began, trying desperately to remove the flush on his face, “it isn't like my panic wasn't justified! Any normal person would react like that when they see a giant hungry fox standing over them.”
She raised a brow at him before shaking her head, a toothy grin on her face. “Well, luckily for you, practically no Pokémon can eat each other no matter how hard they try.”
June blinked. “Really?”
She nodded.
How the hell did that work?
Questions for later. He shook his head. He needed to figure out where he was first. With a grin, he struck a pose. “The name’s June and it rhymes with dune! Nice to meet you, lady...”
“Evie, though I’d ditch the lady part. I'm sure I'm not that much older than you are,” she said with a cheery tone that sounded… odd to his ears.
“So mind if I ask where we are or what you ar–”
“Troublewood. You're in Troublewood,” she said, her eyes narrowing the slightest bit, “and I'm an Eevee.”
“An Eevee?” he repeated with a dry look. “You don't look like one.”
“I know what I am, June.” His mind went alert at the danger laced in her tone. The smile on her face thinned and her eyes narrowed in a subtle glare.
“Right,” he said the word in the most sarcastic tone he could make, making a show to roll his eyes. “Evie the ‘Eevee’. Way to hit the nose with that name,” he muttered, missing the way her teeth bared into a growl as he clapped his claws. “Since we're trading secrets! Why don't I share some of mine with ya, Eves?”
“Don't call me that.” She snarled.
Undeterred, he raised a claw. “How would you react if I told ya that I'm actually a human who got turned into a Pokémon and sent to another universe?”
The smile on her face was fully gone now. Hm, that wasn't the reaction he was fishing for. Whatever, too late to back out now.
“Because I actually am a human that got–blah blah blah and not only that but I also, for some dumb reason, have a doppelganger that has godly powers and am now forced into being his–their–my? pawn for some unknown task!” He finished up with a claw pointed to the sky, his legs spread as he struck a pose.
She muttered something he could barely make out, sounding like she was talking about… mind control? The hell? What did that have to do with–
There was a sudden burst of wind blowing against him, dust and grass flying and when he blinked, his vision was obstructed by a round blue object. He took a step back but the orb only pushed itself forward and into his mouth.
“Here, eat this,” Evie said, having closed the distance in the blink of an eye and currently shoving said round object into his mouth. “It's not much but it'll help that wound of yours heal up better.”
His wound? Oh right, he had forgotten about that. He glanced down, it was mostly healed up and was barely even noticeable, how good was her eyesight if she could spot it? Hell, he could barely see it.
And like with anything else that was given to him, June took the fruit with a silent nod, not quite sure how to respond and wishing his voice would come back before awkwardness took hold of their silence. He bit into the oran berry, the juices of the fruit invigorating his mind and body despite its lacklustre taste.
Evie wiped something off her muzzle, probably having already eaten her own berry as she mumbled about the lack of chesto berries nearby. She turned to him, the previous cheer in her tone all but vanished when she said, “Alright, follow me.”
Swallowing the fruit with an audible gulp, June raised a scaly brow. “Follow you? To where?”
“My home,” she answered. “After what happened the last time one of your kind arrived here, not many Pokémon are keen on seeing another Fire-type so soon.”
There was something quite ominous with the way she said it but he didn't dwell on it for too long. With a cheeky grin and an exaggerated gasp, he said, “Oh, I wouldn't worry about that, Eves.” He ignored her growl. “I'm sure I'll grow on them just like I've grown on you. I mean, there must be some sort of isekai charm on me if I'm already being invited by a girl to her home.”
She gave him a blank stare, turned around and promptly began walking away.
“Hey, wait! I haven't started my two hundred questions in this new world yet! Don't leave!”
Alright I'm here for the next review in our on-going exchange!
Hah very true that Oaks place would likely be pretty boring. I can see how it might feel like a wasted opportunity but it's definitely the smartest and safest option.
I love how I find myself reading Oaks dialogue in his English voice actor voice. Adds an extra layer of depth without you even having to do anything to achieve it!
Makes sense that June he would point out he is a guy. I think explaining why he said it was a good choice too so it lets us know more about his thoughts process since he is still a new character to us audience.
Multiverse travel is not unique to them?? Dang that IS unexpected! I guess if its happening at all though it makes it much more likely on a larger scale, but turning into Pokemon is unique to them? Interesting.
lol at Ane wanting to rush things. I wonder if its a tongue and cheek jab at the type of audience that gets annoyed at stuff taking too long to happen. As for me, as long as the length improves the overall experience, I'm ok with the wait.
Woah what is going on now? That dark/white realm sounds insane!
Aww fiddlesticks I mixed up Ane and Quil's ages. Whatever, I still say Quil acts like the middle child way more than Ane and vice-versa.
Nifty explanation for Ultra Residue. Useful knowledge for world-building.
Good that they have perfect health at least. Keeping their drawbacks as humans translating to their Pokebodies would not be as fun.
Wait a minute, they are not the first Pokefied people? I know in Red Bill swapped places with a Pokemon, but I don't remember it happening in the anime (I might be forgetting though). I just find it odd that Oak would have all this technology for Pokefied people as if its something you see every month. Ok I went back to re-read earlier in the chapter. I did not catch the point that the Poke-fied term was supposed to confirm that people had already been turning into Pokemon. I thought it was just a term that Oak made up on the spot since it sounds like a term you could easily invent on the fly and that June was just running wild with his imagination. (which would be very easy to do given his overall situation!) A little more clarity on this point might be good because if I hadn't gone back to check, I would have incorrectly assumed it to be a plot hole.
Good thing they can't be caught by other trainers. Having their brains rewired by a Pokeball sounds like it would be worse than death. Funny that no one seems to apply that same logic to regular Pokemon. I guess because they are like animals and Pokeballs tame them.
"According to Professor Oak, they would be needed as the FHS, short for Fallers Helpers Society, would need a few months before they could begin the search for their home." This sentence reads kind of weird to me. What are they needed for? Are they needed at Oaks lab while the FHS searches for their home? Is "they" referring to June and his brothers? Do they have to search for their own home? I'm not getting what its trying to say.
Oh maybe Quil is experiencing a constant dark/light realm or is experiencing it much more frequently than June?
Wow June becoming a Pokemon trainer and champion would be pretty cool. He could even battle against or travel with other characters in the anime!
Woah, introducing ultra residue only for it to not be whats going on! Interesting!
To be fair, the way they are talking I would think is pretty convincing, but its good Oak seems to believe them.
Woah they are really becoming trainers as Pokemon apparently. I guess they do still have the bracelets at least.
Nice to see things shift back to Oak so we can see his perspective on it and the bits of scientific lore he is providing is quite interesting.
Oak always struck me as a nice guy in the anime too. Good to see that reflected here.
Oh the idea of them having died in their real world did not occur to me, but it makes sense for someone in his situation to wonder about that, and he has WAY more time to wonder about it than I spend reading the fic!
I absolutely love your attention to detail regarding the plot points from the anime like when Brock's dad took Brocks place after he fights Ash. I had totally forgotten about it until you brought it up.
An entire pack of Rattata just appear out of nowhere! I guess June needs to keep his voice down since Pokemon can understand him!
I feel like we could have used a little more detail prior tois scene. Like maybe Junes thoughts as they are running and being attacked.
Wait so presumably alternate reality human time traveler June stops Ane from going to town on regular Charmander June?
Goes by the name Crude and June (or another version of him from the sounds of it) apparently created him? This is a ton of plot happening all at once! Interesting!
The way Crude responds to the word "imposter" makes me think that the brothers are not their original selves and instead were created as copies of the originals but with Pokemon bodies. Wow.
"June held his head with a shut eye, arms blocking the overly aggressive Pikachu from making a mistake." I have no idea what is happening here. I get that he is blocking Pikachu from making a mistake, but what is he doing to accomplish that? Is he covering Pikachus eyes with his arms?
So now the way Crude asks about how they know if their life is a lie, that's just further fuel for my theory of them being copies of the originals.
"Oh… that's just perfect~ Too bad~ that wasn't a real request." So I think what Crude is trying to say here is that they don't get a choice in doing tasks for him? Did I get it right? Was Crude's line here intended for the reader to understand?
Crude is pretty freaky. He also does give off a demon vibe.
Ok well now I have no idea what is happening. This is jarring, but it is right after a particularly jarring event, so its pretty understandable. Lets see where this goes.
Ugh.. now there are modernish Pokemon showing up. I was excited for the original anime because I get all the references there. Very well, I shall fill in the blanks where I can. Also, I do recognize Luxio and Gligar at least.
("You'll always be my baby, Shez." She patted him on the head, ignoring his embarrassed) bold word here I beleive you meant to have as "embarassment"
Overall, this seems to be a pretty wholesome scene and it seems like its how a group of Pokemon view a trainer. Interesting point of view shift. Also, I like how nurturing Luxio comes across as. Instantly makes me care about that character. The scene also makes me curious about Evie and what role Evie would have in the plot.
I will say though that in the first half of this scene, I was originally preoccupied with what happened to June and the others to the point where I didn't care about what was happening here. Cliff-hanger ending to a scene followed by a pov shift to a character we haven't seen or interacted with yet is narratively jarring. (It was ok with Oak because we were familiar with him and he was already in the plot.) So, for this scene I had catch myself, calm down, and intently focus on it. Once I did that, I was able to find the scene enjoyable and interesting, but other readers might not take the scene how I expect you are probably intending. Perhaps you could use the narration to establish that this scene is not where June is. Other than that I'm not sure what you could do here...
Ah so now we see Evie!
So Evie has regrets and many memories. Evie also seems to be alone. A bit odd for a hero to be so far apparently removed from a community. Nice descriptions of the setting.
So it seems Evie lost her mother and misses her. Thats pretty sad that a hero is so lonely.
Depressed too it seems. But why one wonders?
Ah because she is no longer being a hero. Her heroics gave her a sense of purpose and meaning that she isn't able to replace with every-day life.
She feels isolated. Sounds like Evie could use a therapist.
So if something happened to her sister she would be a complete wreck. I hope that isn't foreshadowing....
So the Tyrant prevents humans from entering. Maybe the tyrant isnt a human? Maybe she is referring to Crude?
A Charmander? I'm guessing we now know where June ended up. If that's the case though, it means he is now far away from Ash and Oak to the point where he would no longer interact with them. That's kind of disspointing to me if true, so hopefully the new direction of the plot will make up for it.
An ongoing war that the humans are involved in? Is this now in the Pokemon games with it being before the events of Pokemon Red in the war Lt Surge mentioned?! Or more likely, this is probably after that point and another war broke out. I'm not sure if its tied to the plot in the anime or games though if so since my knowledge is somewhat limited in both categories beyond a certain point...
Wait.. where are Junes brothers? Did they just get split up??
I don't blame June here for screaming. Thats objectively terrifying to suddenly stumble upon as a comparatively small Charmander.
Uh June.. I don't really think you want to be ticking her off...
Hmm.. ok so I guess she is all bark and no bite. Very lucky for June!
Why on earth is June not worried about his brothers? They are clearly not with them. We know he cares about his brothers so what gives??
I'm guessing at this point we don't get to go back to Ash and Oak. The chapter does introduce some interesting characters and a slew of lore & plot points though. Should be interesting to see what direction things go in from here.
That wraps up my reivew of your chapter 2! I hope you find it enjoyable and/or useful!
Wait a minute, they are not the first Pokefied people? I know in Red Bill swapped places with a Pokemon, but I don't remember it happening in the anime (I might be forgetting though). I just find it odd that Oak would have all this technology for Pokefied people as if its something you see every month.
The whole people turning into Pokémon is actually from a bunch of Pokédex entries and stuff. Y'know, the ghost-types entries, that 'Kid wakes up as Kadabra' entry and I even took a bit of inspiration from the anime when Ash became a Pikachu in that one episode due to literal magic (not joking btw magic exists in the anime).
Good thing they can't be caught by other trainers. Having their brains rewired by a Pokeball sounds like it would be worse than death. Funny that no one seems to apply that same logic to regular Pokemon. I guess because they are like animals and Pokeballs tame them.
I'm not entirely what your take on Pokeballs are but I don't think Pokeballs usually rewire a Pokémon's mind since there aren't any evidence for mind control. That and there's also actual mind control poke balls that look completely different from normal. And mine in this universe doesn't affect a captured Pokémon's mind unless otherwise stated.
According to Professor Oak, they would be needed as the FHS, short for Fallers Helpers Society, would need a few months before they could begin the search for their home." This sentence reads kind of weird to me. What are they needed for? Are they needed at Oaks lab while the FHS searches for their home? Is "they" referring to June and his brothers? Do they have to search for their own home? I'm not getting what its trying to say.
June held his head with a shut eye, arms blocking the overly aggressive Pikachu from making a mistake." I have no idea what is happening here. I get that he is blocking Pikachu from making a mistake, but what is he doing to accomplish that? Is he covering Pikachus eyes with his arms?
Oh he is but there's a reason for why he's acting so nonchalant. It's a little subtle so you might've missed it but i think the next chapter will explain more on why he's like this.
Hello, a bit late but I'm no longer dead from my sickness so...
The whole people turning into Pokémon is actually from a bunch of Pokédex entries and stuff. Y'know, the ghost-types entries, that 'Kid wakes up as Kadabra' entry and I even took a bit of inspiration from the anime when Ash became a Pikachu in that one episode due to literal magic (not joking btw magic exists in the anime).
I'm not entirely what your take on Pokeballs are but I don't think Pokeballs usually rewire a Pokémon's mind since there aren't any evidence for mind control. That and there's also actual mind control poke balls that look completely different from normal. And mine in this universe doesn't affect a captured Pokémon's mind unless otherwise stated.
Fixed that. It was supposed to talk about how their personal information would be needed for like a temporary ID and stuff.
Gonna have to fix that. But basically June is holding his own head and shutting an eye while using his other arm to block Ane.
Yuo, the Tyrant ain't human. But he's not Crude since well, the Tyrant's kinda just... dead.
Oh he is but there's a reason for why he's acting so nonchalant. It's a little subtle so you might've missed it but i think the next chapter will explain more on why he's like this.
Ah, ok, thanks for the lore refresher there. In the anime you wouldn't see that technology because Ash wasn't around Oak when something like that might happen I guess. Good reason for being able to show the tech in your fic then!
Ok so for Pokeballs: Wild Pokemon start as hostile. You then weaken them with battle to where they can no longer fight. You then catch them, ripping them away from their environment, any friends and loved ones they might have, and then force them to work for you. The trainer can release their Pokemon, but its up to the trainer. Trainers can treat their mon as friends, but its up to the trainer. Pokemon are almost always friendly, but typically only after they are caught. There are some exceptions to this, like when anime Charmander evolved into Charmeleon and Charizard. Pokemon are way too ok with being captured after the fact in general. The only thing that makes sense is the balls do something to forcibly tame them. This might be more theory than stated lore for the series though. I can't remember if I learned it from a game, anime, some youtube theory, or if I made it up myself. For the purpose of your story though, your comment clears that matter up with me. Thanks for chiming in there!
Glad I could help point out some things you wanted to fix!
The reason I thought Tyrant might be Crude is because if she killed Tyrant and Tyrant was Crude then I would doubt that Tyrant would be dead because of how powerful Crude is. Crude seems like the type that could very easily fake his own death and would probably find it amusing at the same time. Crude is currently the only antagonist and interaction with Crude is what brought June to where Evie is. The only things we have heard about the Tyrant are from Evie and she didn't desrcibe what the Tyrant looked like. If the Tyrant has the power to prevent humans from entering their forest, it sounds like something Crude could do if he wanted.
Yeah, whatever it was, I'm pretty sure I missed it. Good to know its not an oversight though. That also makes me more interested in seeing the explaination in the next Chapter.
Ok so for Pokeballs: Wild Pokemon start as hostile. You then weaken them with battle to where they can no longer fight. You then catch them, ripping them away from their environment, any friends and loved ones they might have, and then force them to work for you. The trainer can release their Pokemon, but its up to the trainer. Trainers can treat their mon as friends, but its up to the trainer. Pokemon are almost always friendly, but typically only after they are caught. There are some exceptions to this, like when anime Charmander evolved into Charmeleon and Charizard. Pokemon are way too ok with being captured after the fact in general. The only thing that makes sense is the balls do something to forcibly tame them. This might be more theory than stated lore for the series though. I can't remember if I learned it from a game, anime, some youtube theory, or if I made it up myself. For the purpose of your story though, your comment clears that matter up with me. Thanks for chiming in there!
I can kinda see your point if you mostly focused on the games but a decent amount of that could just be chalked up to game mechanics or Game freak being lazy to implement some kind of trust system.
'cause in the anime. Wild Pokémon don't immediately become friendly if they're captured, same with the manga I'm pretty sure. Some examples of Pokémon attacking even while captured: Team Rocket James being attacked by his Gyarados, Iris' Dragonite being an aggressive bugger even after catching him and those are just from the top of my head. Plus not all wild Pokémon are aggressive too. (Even the games have a decent amount of screen time featuring wild Pokémon not being overly aggressive)
And as for family members being torn apart from each other. That kinda just depends on one's world building and how you treat the Pokémon's perspective and mindset since you gotta remember that humans and Pokémon have lived alongside each other for a very long time so it's probably become acceptable or they just got used to it after literally centuries of it happening to them.
My fic will likely tackle on that topic in future chapters so expect some kind of explanation or whatever to that issue.
I can kinda see your point if you mostly focused on the games but a decent amount of that could just be chalked up to game mechanics or Game freak being lazy to implement some kind of trust system.
'cause in the anime. Wild Pokémon don't immediately become friendly if they're captured, same with the manga I'm pretty sure. Some examples of Pokémon attacking even while captured: Team Rocket James being attacked by his Gyarados, Iris' Dragonite being an aggressive bugger even after catching him and those are just from the top of my head. Plus not all wild Pokémon are aggressive too. (Even the games have a decent amount of screen time featuring wild Pokémon not being overly aggressive)
And as for family members being torn apart from each other. That kinda just depends on one's world building and how you treat the Pokémon's perspective and mindset since you gotta remember that humans and Pokémon have lived alongside each other for a very long time so it's probably become acceptable or they just got used to it after literally centuries of it happening to them.
My fic will likely tackle on that topic in future chapters so expect some kind of explanation or whatever to that issue.
