Pokémon A Mew Me: Kuki's Tale [DISCONTINUED]

[Adamhuarts]

Hey guys, it's me again with yet another rebooted version of this story. Before we begin, I'd like to issue an apology to the people who reviewed the last version just before I discontinued it. However, this time will be different. I plan on this being the last time I reboot this story. It's all or nothing now. I'm going to stick with it and finish it if it's the last thing i do. So, i hope you enjoy this take. Au revior!

Spoiler: FEEDBACK DISCLAIMER

I decided to drop this disclaimer here to inform anyone reading this fic that the story is currently undergoing heavy rewrites which puts the reader in a weird spot when it comes to reviewing the chapters.

While I understand that, I'd still encourage any feedback given at all. Though I prefer narrative, prose of structural feedback. Pointing out typos won't do too much good for me currently since I'd probably notice them during the rewriting process. ^^

Chapter One: The Kite

It was a pleasant afternoon. Kuki held her summer hat as a breeze washed over her, immersing herself in the rustling of swaying leaves. Idly, she stared at a round leaf she picked off her sleeve, admiring its green color.

Up in the branches, a red bumpy berry caught her attention. She rubbed her chin as she wondered what it reminded her of. It looked like a red spikeball, and a funny looking one at that. When nothing else came to mind, she let out a bored sigh and flicked off dirt that got on her orange dress.

I wonder what to do when we get back home. Maybe we can play croquette with the berries? No, playing with food is bad. How about a game of tag, but we can only move one step at a time in turns…? Not that either, I’ll probably lose like all the other games of tag we’ve played before. Urgh, I have to think harder.

‘What’s on your mind, Kuki?’ asked a leavanny nearby.

Kuki puffed her cheeks in a pout. “I’m trying to think of a new game we can play,” she replied, stretching her limbs.

The leavanny chuckled, snipping berries off stalks and placing them into a silk bag. ‘Come up with anything yet?’

“No…” Kuki pressed her palms against her cheeks. “I’m still brainstorming.”

The leavanny motioned the girl over. ‘Here, help me hold this bag while I reach for those ones over there.’

Kuki received the bag, gasping when the weight pulled her a bit. “Geez, do we need all these berries?” Kuki asked, sweat dropping down her cheek as she went through the stash. And how was she able to carry all these easily with her thin arms?

‘You have to eat a lot if you want to get big and strong, don’t you?’ the pokemon said, its body glowing white for a few seconds as its body shrank. ‘That’s why we need every single one of them.’

“I guess… but you always eat most of them anyway, Mew,” Kuki replied with a pout.

Mew snickered. She hovered higher up the trees and perched on a broad branch. ‘That’s because I’m a pokemon. My belly is bigger than yours, so I can eat much more than you can!’

“Ooooh, I didn’t know that. I wish I was a pokemon too then,” Kuki muttered while staring down in thought.

‘Kidding! I just like to eat a lot.’

“Oh. You got me there,” Kuki said with a smile. “You know, we should probably hurry before the mean farmer gets back.”

“What in the—it’s you! You’re that thieving girl! Come to steal more of my harvests, have you?!” a loud voice barked.

Kuki widened her eyes when she saw a large man wielding a trowel stomping towards her. From his overalls and straw hat, she recognized him as the farmer who chased them off last time.

“I’m not letting you get away this time!” he mumbled under his breath as he unstrapped a pokeball from his belt. “Tibbles, pin her down!” The angered farmer yelled, hurling the pokeball at her to summon a herdier. The dog pokemon bared its fangs and darted towards Kuki.

“Oh no, he’s here, Mew! Let’s g—” Gravity pulled the girl down, causing her to twist her ankle. She shrieked and face-planted onto the ground, losing her grip on the berry bag. A sharp pain erupted in her leg and when she looked up, the herdier was only a few feet away from striking her.

Mew gasped, her ears propping up in alert.

Just as the herdier was about to pounce on the helpless girl, Mew crashed in front of it in the form of a swampert. The herdier felt an odd pressure coming from its new enemy, but it leapt forward nonetheless, a decision it regretted almost immediately.

‘Back off, bozo!’ Mew yelled, throwing an ice punch straight to the dog’s jaw, sending it rolling back to its master. Before the farmer could process what had transpired, Mew shot out a jet of muddy water straight at the man’s face, toppling him backwards.

“What in heaven’s name?!” The farmer fumed, incessantly rubbing his face with his sleeves to get mud out of his eyes. After about fifteen seconds of flailing around, he was able to open his eyes again, however both the swampert and the girl were gone.

***B***
​

Mew had teleported both of them to safety. They were back in their small room in the basement of a lighthouse, one Mew happened to acquire after winning a bet against a certain old friend.

“That was so close,” Kuki said, her hands tightly clasped around her left foot. “I even dropped my hat… but it’s fine. I have other hats, so we don’t have to go back for it. That farmer will probably throw it away since we made him mad,” she said while forcing a smile.

Mew didn’t reciprocate the smile. Her eyes drooped as she placed her paws on Kuki’s cheeks, her big blue eyes staring into the girl’s golden yellow eyes. ‘You ought to be more careful, Kuki.’

Kuki gently pushed Mew and turned her face the other way. “I’m fine… You don’t have to be so worried. I just twisted my ankle a bit.”

‘Mmmm…’ Mew’s eyes glowed and she inspected Kuki’s foot. ‘It sure looks like you did. At least you didn't dislocate it or worse...’

All color faded from Kuki’s face as she gulped. “Oh come on Mew, it's not like I'm made of glass or something. A twisted ankle is no biggie. I can stand up just fine. See?” Kuki tried pushing herself to her feet, but stopped halfway when a sharp pain pierced her joint.

As she was about to fall, Kuki felt an invisible force hold her in place. Mew smirked as she helped her sit back on the carpet. ‘See? What did I tell you? You won’t be able to walk unless it’s fixed, young lady.’

Kuki puffed her cheeks. “But it’s going to hurt just like last time, and I don’t wanna!” she complained.

Mew scratched her cheek and chuckled nervously. ‘Come now, I didn’t know it’d hurt that much before. There’s still plenty I don’t understand about humans, but I know a way to make it not hurt at all this time!’

Kuki drew closer, tilting her head. “You do?”

Mew smiled brightly with a nod. She hovered onto Kuki’s laps and her eyes began to glow. ‘Just look into my eyes and you won’t even feel a thing.’

Kuki did as told. Shortly after, she felt her mind becoming light as clouds. The girl couldn’t feel anything, as though she was submerging into her sea of thoughts indefinitely. When she blinked, Mew was no longer in front of her. She blinked a few more times and looked around, quickly noticing the light bandaging around her foot.

“Huh? What happened?”

‘I used a little hypnosis on you. It didn’t hurt at all just like I said, right?’ Mew said with a giggle.

“Huh,” was all Kuki said in response. Her head still felt a bit fuzzy from the experience. Sure enough, she didn’t feel any pain when she moved her foot anymore, only a slight dullness.

Kuki found Mew standing by the bag of berries they’d collected that day. Mew used her telekinesis to pick out the berries, grouping them by color and shape on a tray.

‘I bet you’re really hungry now. Which one are you going to pick first? The red ones, the blue ones, the pink ones, the orange ones…’

Kuki beamed up as she dug her fingers into the berry pile. “I’m taking all of them!”

Mew couldn’t help but laugh when Kuki said that. She sat back and watched Kuki enjoy her meal.


“Aren't you going to take any?” Kuki asked while nibbling on the berry she was holding.

‘I thought you were taking all of them.’

“Oh, well I don’t mind sharing!” Kuki said with a chuckle. “Just don’t eat all of them like you sometimes do.”

‘Alright, alright. I’ll try not to finish everything,’ Mew said with a smirk.

“Nuh-uh, I’m not sharing then!” Kuki said, playfully pulling the tray beside her.

‘I’m kidding!’ Mew reassured her.

Kuki giggled as she returned the tray back to its place. “I know. You always are.”

Mew winked at the girl. ‘Aww, you know me so well.’

The two enjoyed a quiet meal, exchanging glances every so often. Kuki had her head in the clouds, staring idly at the single light bulb on the ceiling. A slow smile found its way to Mew’s face. She wondered what the girl was thinking, but she’d once promised not to pry into the girl’s memories in the past. Besides, not knowing was part of the fun.

“Let’s make a kite.” Kuki said, breaking the silence as she bit on the last pecha berry.

Mew tilted her head sideways. ‘A kite? Like the one in that lotad prince show?’

“It’s Lotus Prince, not lotad!” Kuki corrected, her eyes firing up.

Mew giggled, her tail waving back and forth. ‘Sorry, I can’t seem to ever get the name right.’

“You actually remind me of the fairy queen from The Lotus Prince.”

‘Huh? What’s the fairy queen like?’ Mew asked, her curiosity piqued.

“Oh, she’s this magical lady who helps and guides the hero on his great journey to save the Lotus Kingdom! She’s the one who gave him his magic kite which he uses to fly around,” Kuki said, waving her hand in the air with a wide smile, then her smile faded. “Maybe we could watch it again sometime? We never got to finish watching it together cause you’re always going out somewhere.”

‘Oh, I apologize for that, Kuki. The things I often do away from here on my own are too dangerous for a delicate human like you, but when you get older and stronger I promise I’ll take you out on my adventures more often!’ Mew said, holding Kuki’s hand with her tiny paws after hovering to her.

Kuki’s mouth fell open. She held Mew’s paws tightly and her eyes gleamed. “You promise?!”

Mew giggled. ‘I promise!’

“Yay, alright! I sure can’t wait to grow up then! I’m so excited!” Kuki said, humming to herself as she pictured herself and Mew exploring hidden caves, finding lost treasures and saving the world from bad guys among other stuff. “We’d have adventures just like in the shows and movies!”

Mew couldn’t help but chuckle at seeing Kuki absorbed in her dreams like that. ‘Come on now, let’s not get carried away. Here, tell me more about this kite thing you mentioned earlier.’

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot,” Kuki said, lightly slapping her forehead. She got up and walked to the pile of papers and cardboard they happened to have sitting in the room. “We can make a kite out of some light paper, and with these sticks… Oh, don’t forget the strings to tie them up together.”

Mew peeked over Kuki’s shoulder to see what she was doing. She made an ‘ah’ sound when a realization dawned upon her. ‘So, this is why you took those things from that human shop the other day?’

“Oh that? I actually wanted to make something else called an origami that day, but I couldn’t really figure it out. I kind of gave up,” Kuki explained with a sigh, twirling a string around a chopstick.

‘You silly girl, you shouldn’t give up on something just because it’s difficult.’

Kuki pouted with her arms folded. “The instructions were too complicated. I couldn’t follow them at all! There were like fold it like this, and like that. There were pictures, but they were no help,” Kuki said while drooping her shoulders.

‘Well if you’re feeling up to it again some other time, we can make some of these origamis together!’ Mew said, throwing her fist in the air. ‘If we put our heads together, I’m sure we’ll be able to understand the instructions!’

“Really?!” Kuki asked, leaning forward. “But first, we have to make the kite!”

Mew giggled as she climbed up Kuki’s shoulder. ‘That’s the spirit, my girl! Now then, where do we start?’

And so, the two of them set to work on the kites. After a few failed attempts, Kuki suggested they watch The Lotus Prince again to figure out how, but they ended up marathoning the series because Kuki forgot which episode the instructions were shown in. After a few hours and lots of used paper, they finally made something that actually resembled a working kite.

“Hooray, we did it! We made a kite,” Kuki said before letting out a huge yawn. She heaved a deep sigh and rubbed her eyes groggily. “Let’s go and test it out, Mew. We… still don’t know… if it can fly yet,” Kuki said, struggling to keep her eyes open.

Mew giggled as she flicked off a small bit of paper on Kuki’s nose. ‘Let’s leave that till tomorrow, dear. You’re tired right now,’ Mew replied, holding Kuki in her arms as she transformed into an audino.

Kuki groaned as she meekly tried nudging away from Mew before her arm dropped again. “I can still keep going…” Kuki argued, but the bags under her eyes weren’t fooling anyone.

‘No, Kuki. It’s sleepy time for you.’

“Awwwww.”

‘Don’t worry. We’ll play again first thing in the morning.’

With what strength she could muster, Kuki held onto Mew’s hand and met her eyes. “Mew, will we always be together?”

Mew’s eyes widened at the sudden question, then her expression softened to a smile. “Always, Kuki. Always.”

“Yaaaaay…” With that, Kuki finally fell asleep with her body resting limp in Mew’s arms.

After holding onto her for a few minutes, Mew got up and gently tucked Kuki into bed. She drew some of the girl’s loose hair behind her ear and then kissed her on the forehead. Mew's eyes felt heavy, and she too yawned just like Kuki did before.

‘Guess it’s sleepy time for me too.’ She hovered onto the bed and stretched her limbs. With a hum, she tucked herself under the blanket next to Kuki, a smile on her face as she closed her eyes. ‘Good night, Kuki.’

***B***​

Kuki found herself standing alone in a dark lit area. Her eyes were distant, and she slowly glanced back and forth to perceive her surroundings. “Where am I?”

There were no doors or corners in sight. Both the paths ahead and behind her were pitch black, and the only thing guiding her were the invisible light sources that lit the tunnel. With a gulp, Kuki did what she felt made sense. She walked in the direction she was already facing.

Kuki wrapped her arms around her. The area was strangely cold, and she felt like she’d been walking for hours on end. “Mew! Hello! Is anyone here?!”

She bit her lip when her voice echoed back toward her. Kuki sighed, marching on and hoping she could find a way out somehow.

CLACK!

Kuki’s body stiffened at the sound. She slowly turned toward where it came from, widening her eyes when she saw a red viscous bundle of chains crawling toward her. She screamed and bolted forward, not once stopping to turn backwards again as she ran with all her might.

Clack!

CLACK!

CLACK!!

Kuki fell when something pulled on her leg. She gazed back in horror upon seeing that the chains had caught up to her. Looking at them up close, they had a burning glow to them and a dark aura rising off them like smoke. Kuki raised a hand to untangle her foot, but the chain quickly seized her arm. Raising her other arm led to the same outcome, and she soon found herself completely restrained

Kuki screamed as the chains constricted around her to the point where all she could do was wheeze, her ribs slowly squeezing down on her lungs as a burning pain erupted from her chest. She squeezed her eyes shut, tears running down her face as she begged for the pain to stop.

Mew… save me.

A strange pink light filled the tunnel and Kuki felt the chains rapidly untangling her. When she opened her eyes, both the chains and the tunnel were gone. She found herself sitting in a bright lumpy area that resembled cloud tops.

When Kuki turned her gaze, she saw a pink light orb facing her. She squinted her eyes at it, tilting her head and wondering what it was. She felt a familiar warmth, drawing her closer to it. When she touched it, it dissolved into her body, making her body radiate a pink glow.

Right after that, the clouds began to shatter like glass all around her. Before she could even stand, she’d already lost her foothold, screaming as she fell into the abyss.

Kuki awoke with a gasp. She was back on her bed, the lightbulb on the ceiling greeting her as she stared at it. She stared idly as she sat up, her movements somewhat sluggish.

‘Rise and shine, Kuki!’ Mew said, suddenly appearing on her shoulder. She gave Kuki her usual carefree smile.

Kuki felt her eyes watering up when she saw Mew. With tears running down her face, she suddenly pulled the pokemon into a tight embrace.

Mew’s eyes widened for a moment, then she lightly stroked Kuki’s forehead with her tail. ‘Did you have a nightmare again?’

“Mmmhmm.”

‘Everything’s okay now, Kuki. I’m here for you. I’m here,’ Mew said, smiling softly.

 

[kintsugi]

Ah! Hello again! Glad that this story is still continuing in some fashion!

‘You have to eat a lot if you want to get big and strong, don’t you?’ the pokemon said, its body glowing white for a few seconds as its body shrank. ‘That’s why we need every single one of them.’

“I guess… but you always eat most of them anyway, Mew,” Kuki replied with a pout.

I'm a bit torn on this character introduction for Mew -- on the one hand, I'm a huge sucker for subtle character introductions instead of spelling out every detail of this new character's life. But on the other hand, I definitely didn't pick up on the fact that the leavanny was also Mew, even knowing what direction the fic was going in -- I think for me it's because I didn't link "body glowing white" and "body shrank" as "transform", but that really might've just been me!

“Tibbles, pin her down!”

This seems like a really mean overreaction to a small child -- herdier are big!!

Mew said, smiling softly.

I'm not sure if "softly" is the right word here? To me it mostly implies volume/audibility.

Otherwise, I really dig this as a first chapter! I don't know what major structural changes you'll be making, but I do agree with your call to let some of the preliminary action take backstage and to have the intro focus primarily on Mew/Kuki's relationship -- this seems to be one of the central threads of the story (and also it's really cute). Definitely some stuff going on under the hood with the dream sequence, but those are all bad things that are out in the future and totally won't be issues any time soon! :')

As always, I really dig the slice-of-life Mew/Kuki hangouts. These feel similar to your first iteration but with a bit more flavor, and they're lovely and cute as always!

I heard from a bird that this is secretly going to end up being a pokemorph fic 👀 -- absolutely looking forward to seeing where this ends up going in the flesh!

 

[kyeugh]

alas, i got distracted and didn't get to read the final version of this chapter before you posted it, so i'm excited to see the changes you've made! this is a nice fic, at least as far into it as i got in the previous revision, and i agree that the changes you're making with this reboot are good ones, so i'm excited to see the direction it goes. kuki and mew's relationship is indeed very cute, and i felt like we could've gotten more of it in the last revision, so i'm glad we get to dive into it a bit more.

while i do beta read for this fic, i try to focus on grammatical/mechanical issues, and attempt to make some suggestions for the total trajectory of the plot as a whole, but i try not to say too much about my feelings on the chapter itself, so hopefully there's still some good content in this review for you even though i've given some form of this chapter a look over before. :p

as far as the leavanny goes, i think i would agree with kintsugi that it's a bit confusing. on my first read, i was definitely tripped up by it, but because i eventually figured it out based on the dialogue, i kind of went "ohhh" and moved on. however, it's true that it could be more clear from the outset. i think having her start as a leavanny is fine in general, but the actual act of transforming could be more obvious—maybe go into some more detail about the act of transformation itself, and leave off with some kind of description of the end result so we know what we're looking at is mew before it's said explicitly?

i actually feel okayish about the herdier thing tbh. herdier is roughly the size of a large dog, like a golden retriever, right? kuki says that they've been caught stealing this guy's crops before, and honestly i think the inordinate amount of anger about that (even towards a child) feels believable for a farmer type. anecdotal, perhaps, but as a kid i used to explore the woods behind my house quite a lot (despite the no tresspassing signs and, uh, trampled barbed wire fence, etc.), and i'd brush up with the landowner occasionally, who was this angry rednecky type guy who drove around in his pickup truck. he would always threaten to call the police or shoot me or whatever if he saw me and my friends running around in the woods again... maybe that's not normal lmfao. but. it does incline me to read this farmer interaction as believable since i've been threatened worse for less. :p however, the herdier's body language does seem kind of attack-mode... maybe it would be best if it didn't bare its fangs etc, and it was more clear that the herdier was going for a sort of nonlethal, basically harmless takedown out of obedience rather than writing it as kind of pissed off?

might be misremembering, but i don't remember mew intervening as a swampert in the previous revision. if that's indeed a new touch, i think it's a nice one. it gives us a sense of mew's secrecy, that she can't be seen by commoners etc. sort of casts her relationship with kuki in a different light.. they're in this household with no legal adults, sort of just hanging out together, and mew's status as, well, mew and not a human adult no doubt makes things hard for them both. i wonder if mew experiences any guilt as a result of that? does she feel that she's depriving kuki of a conventional childhood?

Mew didn’t reciprocate the smile. Her eyes drooped as she placed her paws on Kuki’s cheeks, her big blue eyes staring into the girl’s golden yellow eyes. ‘You ought to be more careful, Kuki.’

this didn't really jump out at me before, but i find mew's concern here kind of odd. mew was okay with bringing kuki to this guy's farm and stealing his crops despite knowing the potential consequences of it, but is scolding kuki to be more careful when she ends up hurt due to it? maybe mew is just irresponsible, but this feels like a strange reaction to have.

i like their little back and forth about the berries. makes me feel like mew is sort of this mischievous trickster character, which tbh feels right for mew. kuki seems well-adjusted to it, both recognizing the joke and receiving it in good nature, rather than becoming upset by it as you might expect a young child to. i think this paints a nice picture of their family dynamic.

“You actually remind me of The Fairy Queen from The Lotus Prince.”

i feel like this was probably my fault, but "The" should actually not be capitalized here, i don't think.

“Yay, alright! I sure can’t wait to grow up then! I’m so excited!” Kuki said,

😭😭

And so, the two of them set to work on the kites. After a few failed attempts, Kuki suggested they watch The Lotus Prince again to figure out how, but they ended up marathoning the series because Kuki forgot which episode the instructions were shown in.

hahaha, i think i said this about the last revision, but this is such a cute and clever detail, it makes me smile every time.

Kuki wrapped her arms around her. The area felt strangely cold, and she felt like she’d been walking for hours on end.

* around herself. the use of "felt" twice in a row here seems sorta clunky... maybe something like "The are was strangely cold, and she felt like she'd been walking for hours on end" would flow better?

i really liked this dream sequence! i definitely picked up on where it was going, but i like that it didn't, like, beat me over the head with it. it was also legitimately pretty gripping, and "red viscous bundle of chains" is a really gross and vivid description. i really like that addition overall, and also like that you don't spend a bunch of time dwelling on the implications of the dream afterward... kuki just wakes up upset and looks for comfort without reading into it really at all, which is basically what you'd expect from a child. maybe i've been burned by dream sequences too much in the past and kind of expect them to be on the nose as a result, but i was really impressed with this one.

cute chapter over all! i think there's a lot more going on here than in the first revision and i feel a lot more pulled in. the dream sort of suggests the dark things down the line without leaning into them too heavily, which i think is a good direction to move for this first bit of the fic. feeling good about it overall, can't wait to see the next chapter!

 

[canisaries]

Read Chapter 1! Boy, that ending sure took a turn. I was going to describe this story as very comfy before, but that nightmare injected a lot more depth and stakes in, as it surely can't be just a mere dream with that strange symbolism. The contrast took me by surprise, but I don't think it was so much that it would've created whiplash - the story had gotten a bit dark before with the almost-mauling by the herdier before, after all, so that (and the fact that they're stealing, which brings up some moral intrigue) already showed this wasn't going to be all sunshine and rainbows.

But the sunshine and rainbows certainly are lovely! Kuki comes across well as a young child without it even being explicitly stated due to her interests and way of thinking. The interactions she and Mew have are very cute. Mew has a big sister / mother role to Kuki, though how she's connected to her is still a mystery. Certain details point to Mew not having raised Kuki since birth, so how the girl ended up under the mon's care and where Kuki's real parents are (if she even has any) are questions a reader will want to read on to know.

Now for some more specific notes:

Idly, she stared at a round leaf she picked off her sleeve, admiring its green color.

When nothing else came to mind, she let out a bored sigh and flicked off dirt that got on her orange dress.

I think "she'd picked off" and "had got(ten) on her dress" would work better, as simple past for both these and the actions they cause sounds off the same way "she stares at a round leaf she picks off her shirt" or "she flicks off the dirt that gets on her orange dress" does.

Maybe we can play croquette with the berries?

"Croquet" is the sport while "croquette" is a food item, but to be fair, Kuki might not know that.

How about a game of tag, but we can only move one step at a time in turns…?

homemade pmd simulator

“Ooooh, I didn’t know that. I wish I was a pokemon too then,” Kuki muttered while staring down in thought.

tempting fate are we...

“What in heaven’s name?!” The farmer fumed, incessantly rubbing his face with his sleeves to get mud out of his eyes. After about fifteen seconds of flailing around, he was able to open his eyes again, however both the swampert and the girl were gone.

***B***​

“I… messed up… That was so close,” Kuki huffed between breaths, her hands tightly clasped around her left foot. “I even dropped my hat… but it’s fine. I have other hats, so we don’t have to go back for it. That farmer will probably throw it away since we made him mad,” she said while forcing a smile.

Okay, so this part kind of confused me: in the beginning of this next scene, Kuki is out of breath, and she's dropped her hat which I don't think was mentioned happening before that timeskip took place. It makes it seem a lot like Kuki ran away, but her ankle is twisted and in bad enough pain for her not to be able to stand well, so it's unclear what actually happened. Did Mew carry her with telekinesis or perhaps teleport them both away? Either sounds possible, but neither is implied, while running seems to be despite seeming impossible. Fortunately, this is remedied very easily, as simply adding something like Mew lowering Kuki onto the floor and releasing her psychic hold at the very start would signal to the audience that telekinesis was the escape method used.

There's also another thing with this scene change, though. The environment isn't described at the start or the duration of the whole twisted ankle discussion, so I imagine most readers would assume the same as me, that being that they're in a similar environment as before, but just out of range from the farmer. But then there's a mention of a tray and lightbulb ahead, which definitely point to this being an indoor location, and now with that information the reader kind of needs to rewrite the whole scenario in their heads. So what I'm getting at is that a location change would be better established early on, even if it's just a mention of a concrete floor or something, as then readers will know right off the bat to clear their previous background image and begin building a new one.

As she was about to fall, Kuki felt an invisible force hold her in place. Of course, it had been Mew who prevented her from dropping using her psychic powers.

I feel like this second sentence is unnecessary spelling out the event - we know Mew has telekinesis and would sensibly use it for this purpose.

Mew couldn’t help but laugh when Kuki said that. She sat back and watched Kuki enjoy her meal.


“Aren't you going to take any?” Kuki asked while nibbling on the berry she was holding.

Extra row change here?

Wha???

CLACK!!

Using several punctuation marks to emphasize something can seem like a good idea, but typically it ends up looking jarring. To emphasize in the first case, you could use "!?" instead, but I know some authors don't consider that proper, either. Up to you in the end.

Mew tilted her head sideways. ‘A kite? Like the one in that lotad prince show.’

You'll want a question mark there.

Mew said, holding Kuki’s hand with her tiny paws after hovering to her.

It's usually better to describe sequences of things in chronological order, because this kind of has that mental rewrite thing I mentioned with the setting change - a reader will have to go back and insert that hovering all the way before the line was said.

Mew peeked over Kuki’s shoulder to see what she was doing. She made an ‘ah’ sound when a realization dawned upon her. ‘So, this is why you took those things from that human shop the other day?’

Took, huh? With them stealing before, this makes one wonder if these two don't really believe in buying things...

Kuki found herself standing alone in a dark lit area.

she saw a pink light orb facing her

Two phrases of which I'm not sure what they mean. "Dark" and "lit" are essentially opposites, and while the tunnel is strange in regard to lighting, this word combination by itself is just confusing. Did you mean something more like "dimly lit"?

A pink light orb reads like it's a pink orb with little weight, but I think it's meant to be glowing, i.e. a "pink orb of light". That wording's less ambiguous and reads better in my opinion. It could also be a "bright, pink orb".

A strange pink light suddenly filled the tunnel

"Suddenly" can often come off as redundant - if something surprising or unexpected happens, readers will perceive it as sudden by default. And while redundancy isn't terribly bad, shearing it tends to make for tighter and more engaging prose.

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I've seen you stress over rebooting this story many times, but to me this is a very solid start to a story. Lots of intrigue created rather subtly through lovely character interactions. I did have some things to critique, but they were all rather minor and easily fixable in the end, nothing fundamental.

With uni starting again, I'll be pretty busy and have less time for reading, but I hope to continue with this when I find a suitable time. Till then, good luck in writing!

 

[Adamhuarts]

Chapter 2: Kuki's Play

“Prepare to be vanquished, Lord Gengar!” Kuki cried, a cardboard sword in hand and wearing a squirtle costume with a papercraft hat.

‘So, you’ve made it this far, Explorer of Stuff and Things?’ Lord Genger said with a laugh.

Kuki raised her sword toward the sky. “Yes, I have! You’d better be prepared, because your reign of terror comes to an end now!”

To help Kuki immerse herself even more in their play, Mew even changed their surroundings with illusions to match the descriptions Kuki had written in their scripts.

Mew grinned and folded her arms. She was seated in a spiky purple throne, looking down at the brave hero who had foolishly dared to confront her alone. ‘I didn’t expect you to defeat my generals so quickly. I underestimated you, little explorer.’

Mew had also played the parts of all the defeated generals.

Kuki sported a cocky grin and pointed her sword at Lord Gengar. “Hahah! I have the power of my friends on my side. Once I’ve defeated you, peace will be restored to the lands once more!”

Mew threw her arms outward and descended from the throne with a dramatic flair.

‘Don’t be fooled. I have the high ground!’

“Oh yeah? I have an even higher ground than you do!” Kuki said, standing on her toes.

‘Is that so? Let’s settle this then. Come at me!’

Kuki roared and charged with her blade pointed outward. Mew Did the same, running at the girl with a grin. The two ran past each other as silence dawned upon them.

Mew held her stomach and then fell to the ground. ‘Impossible. I’m Dark Lord Gengar! How could I have been defeated so easily?’

Kuki walked back to her defeated foe, resting her blade on her shoulder. She looked down at Lord Gengar with a triumphant smile.

‘Is this the part where you finish me off?’ Mew asked, faking a cough.

Kuki shook her head and bent over to lend Lord Gengar a hand. “No, I refuse! I won’t allow the cycle of bloodshed to continue. It’s not too late for you, Lord Gengar. You can turn over a new leaf.”

‘Uhhh.’ Mew seemed to have forgotten her next line for a moment before quickly remembering. ‘Ah, right… You think society will accept a monster like me?’

Kuki nodded, pointing her fist towards herself. “Of course, but you have to work hard for it. Everyone can change, and so can you!”

Mew couldn’t help but snicker at that line. It sounded so cheesy, and Kuki looked too adorable saying it for her to bear.

“Meeew! You’re ruining the play!” Kuki said with a pout.

‘I’m sorry, it was just too much!’ Mew said, hands over her mouth while she burst into laughter.

Kuki puffed up her cheeks, pouting even harder.

‘Okay, I’ll stop. Let’s continue,’ Mew said, wiping a tear from her eye.

Kuki dropped her cardboard sword. She turned the other way and squatted. “I don’t feel like playing anymore!”

Mew sighed. She waved her paw and dispelled the illusion she’d cast, returning the landscape back to the grassy garden. She then hovered to Kuki and poked her cheek.

‘Come on, don’t be like that. You just looked too cute as the brave hero, and I couldn’t help myself.’

Kuki’s cheeks reddened, but she jerked her face the other way. “Hmph!”

Mew hovered to her other side to face her again. ‘I know what will cheer you up! Let’s go have some ice cream!’

“I don’t want any!”

Mew smiled slyly. ‘Are you sure? Not even a teeny bit? They’re even Lum berry flavored, you know.’

“… Okay, maybe a little bit,” Kuki said, groaning in defeat.

Mew giggled. ‘That’s what I like to hear.’

***B***​

They returned to their room in the lighthouse basement. Mew had brought the ice cream from the refrigerator by the time Kuki was done changing into her normal dress. She added three large scoops into Kuki’s bowl and handed it to her.

‘Remember not to eat it too quickly or you’ll get a brain freeze!’ Mew reminded, twirling the ice cream scoop in the air.

“I know…,” Kuki said, holding the bowl in her hands. She could feel the ice cream’s coldness through the bowl. While she was staring at the teal green colored dessert.

‘Ah, it tastes good, doesn’t it?’ Mew said, a dreamy look on her face as she took a spoon from her bowl. ‘I wish I knew how humans made these things, then we could be making our own ice cream!’

“Oh, and we could even make all kinds of flavors too!” Kuki said with a smile.

‘If you could make your own ice cream flavors, what kinds would you make?’

“I would make… popsicles!”

‘Popsicles? Aren’t those different from ice cream? That isn’t even a flavor.’

“Oh, then I would make lum berry ice-cream with chocolate cookies!”

‘That does sound yummy.’

“We could even try making an ice cream cake, like the one Candace and Roy had in The Roadrail!” Kuki closed her eyes and smiled. She could almost taste the cake.

‘Ice cream cake? Won’t the ice melt?’

“You gotta eat it before it does… I think. I’m not sure,” Kuki held her spoon in her mouth and groaned. “I don’t even know how to make it, and they didn’t show it in the movie. Do I even know how to make an ordinary cake? I think we need something called an oven or something to bake it."

Kuki hummed. “Did you know, if we had an oven, we could even make cookies, brownies and all kinds of delicious snacks!” Kuki said, twirling her spoon while she explained.

‘We’re not getting an oven. It’s that thing that gets really hot, isn’t it? You’ll just end up getting hurt, and I wouldn’t want that,’ Mew said, folding her arms.

“I can be careful!” Kuki argued with a pout. “I’ll even wear an apron, a pair of mittens and that long funny looking chef hat.”

‘How about we start with learning how to make ice cream first instead? It sounds less dangerous.’

“But I want to bake a cake,” Kuki said, taking a spoon from her ice cream with downcast eyes.

Mew sighed. She didn’t like making Kuki too upset, and she had already ruined Kuki’s fantasy play earlier. ‘Fine then. We can get an oven, but only if you promise to be extra careful. Also, you can only use it if I’m there to watch.’

“Really? You’re the best, Mew!” Kuki said with a little dance. “Now we can learn how to bake a cake together!”

Mew drew her brows close, then leaned forward while staring at Kuki. ‘Did you ask for an oven just so I’d spend more time with you?’

Kuki pursed her lips and turned her eyes towards the other side of the room. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I mean, sure, it’d be wonderful and nothing would make me happier…”

Mew smirked, then burst into laughter. ‘You sly vulpix. You don’t have to trick me for something like that. I’m always going to be here for you,’ Mew said, patting Kuki’s head with the tip of her tail.

Kuki chuckled and straightened her bangs. “I really do want to learn how to bake cakes though. It sounds fun, but I know I’m clumsy sometimes, so, if an oven is really dangerous, it’s fine if we don’t get it. We definitely should make that ice cream though!”

‘Are you sure? I can protect you if we’re using the oven together.’

Kuki shook her head. “No, it’s alright. My dream isn’t to become a baker anyway, but to become a star!”

‘Oh yeah, you mentioned something about that before, didn’t you?’ Mew asked, taking a large spoon out of her ice cream.

“Yeah!” Kuki exclaimed and stood up. “I want to be like those actors and be in my own movie. Did you know, when an actor takes a role it’s like they get to become someone else entirely than who they really are?”

‘Huh? Really?’

“Yeah! Even though it’s for a short time, they get to live in the same world as those characters and feel what they’re feeling. It sounds exciting, doesn’t it?”

‘Isn’t that pretty much what we already do in our plays?’

Kuki chuckled. “Well, sorta, but there’s a difference. When making a movie you need to have cameras, a director, actors, and a bunch of other stuff!” Kuki got up and pulled a book from a pile on their bedside drawer. “I read all about it in this book you got me!” The book was titled Movies in A Nutshell.

Mew hummed, taking the last spoon from her ice cream bowl. ‘I’m sure you’ll be a great star, Kuki. You’ll be the brightest one there is.’

“Aww, thanks Mew!” Kuki said, her cheeks reddening. She sat on their bed and sighed. “I don’t really know how to get in a movie though. You’re supposed to do something called an audition first, but that’s all I know.” She furrowed her brows and flipped through the pages of the book. “I really need to read this book again.”

Mew levitated their empty bowls and stacked them together. ‘We’ll figure it out together. That aside, do you want to go anywhere today, Kuki?’

Kuki raised her finger to her lip and hummed. “Actually, I wanted us to work on a script for our next play! I have a few ideas, but nothing is really hitting the spot for me yet. I need some inspiration!”

‘Which place do you have in mind then?’ Mew asked, hovering to her.

“I’m not really sure. A theater would be awesome! We would be able to see actors performing live there!” Kuki said, swinging her legs back and forth. “Maybe I could even ask the people there if we can be part of a play!”

‘Where would we even find a theater? Do you know any places?’

“I don’t really know… There might be one in Nimbasa City! There are so many cool places there, especially the amusement park!” Kuki chimed with starry eyes.

Mew’s eyes lit up as well. ‘The amusement park! We had so much fun there last time! Let’s visit it again after the theater.’

“Really? We can?! Yay, this day just got even better!”

Mew giggled. ‘I’m glad you’re feeling energetic.’ Mew levitated the empty bowls with her. ‘Lemme clean these up and then we can leave right away!’

“Okay!” Kuki replied, resting her head on her hands.

***B***​

Mew went out of the basement, humming to herself while she made her way to the other building connected to the lighthouse. She raised a brow when a lone black feather fell in front of the door before her. When she recognized it, her pulse quickened. The pitch-black feather, bearing red veins that coursed from its spine, belonged to none other than them!

A shadow loomed over her, revealing the one who dropped the feather. A large bird-like pokemon laid perched on the side of the lighthouse. They brandished large claws on their wings and tail, claws almost as sharp as the horns on their head. Even the slightest movement they made sent red light pulsing across them. They scowled at Mew with their lifeless blue eyes.

‘Yveltal…’ Mew uttered, her body stiffening.

‘We meet again, Firstborn, as we always do,’ Yveltal said. What came from their beak was a mismatch of several voices. It was as though they were making a sparse imitation of one.

‘What do you want?’

‘You know what we seek. There is a soul here about to depart, and we…’ Yveltal began to crawl down the lighthouse, its claws digging into the cement with every step. ‘WE are here to collect.’

‘It’s only been three days. She’s perfectly fine right now!’

Yveltal cocked their head sideways. They laughed. ‘Are you certain about that?’

Mew widened her eyes, her body trembling in place. The bowls she had been holding fell on the ground, the noise snapping her back to reality. She immediately made a run for the basement room.

When Mew got there, Kuki had her hand pressed to her chest. Her hair hid her face while she was hunched over, but Mew could see that she was trembling uncontrollably.

‘Kuki!’ Mew called out to her.

“Mew…?” Kuki tried to stand, but she collapsed on the ground the moment she took a step.

‘Kuki!!’ Mew rushed over to her. Gently, she sat her up, pulling aside the hair covering her face.

Kuki’s forehead was drenched in sweat, and blood was trickling from the corners of her mouth. When their eyes met, Kuki looked at her with tears and parted her lips.

“It… hurts…”

Mew pursed her lips, a sour taste building up in her mouth. Kuki’s voice was weak, and she was barely hanging onto her consciousness. Mew held her close, tears forming in her eyes.

‘It’s going to be okay. I’m with you now.’

A black wisp sprung into the room, manifesting Yveltal from it. Their foreboding glow was even brighter in the dimly lit room. They perched over the mirror-side drawer, having shrunken their size considerably.

Yveltal leaned forward. ‘Her time has come, Mew, and we will help her pass on.’

‘Why? You’re only supposed to show up when a calamity is happening. Why are you trying so hard to take Kuki from me?!’

‘What you have spoken is true, but this situation piqued our interest. Just as we are supposed to appear during calamity, you are supposed to use your power of genesis only to restore what has been lost, after we are done collecting the fallen souls. Yet, you have been using it all on a human for the past two cycles. Outrageous!’

‘So what?! It’s the only way I can save her, otherwise…’

‘You are misusing your power, Firstborn. You needlessly postpone the inevitable. End her suffering. Let her pass on. Let us collect!’ Yveltal demanded, a dark aura erupting from their body.

Mew winced, but she brushed off the aura. She frowned and laid Kuki down. Mew then hovered over her and held out her arms. Her fingers disappeared as her arms grew three times in length, tapering at the tips. Her whole body shone in a bright pink color, then she stabbed her needle-like arms into Kuki’s chest. The energy from Mew’s body started pouring into Kuki, which evoked a growl from the displeased Yveltal.

‘Do you even know what will happen if you keep doing this?!’

‘I know what will happen. I’ll give Kuki part of my power, her body will heal for a while, I’ll get to spend some more time with her, then you’ll rear your ugly head here and start blabbing nonstop again. Rinse and repeat.’

‘How foolish! We do not understand your intentions. What do you hope to achieve? It does not make sense!’

‘Of course, it doesn’t make sense to someone like you. You only know how to collect, but I am different. For me, If I get to spend even one more moment with Kuki, then I’d do whatever it takes to save her,” Mew said, her expression growing bitter.

As Mew channeled her life energy into Kuki, she recalled what happened two years ago. It was when she took Kuki to a hospital the first time she collapsed from her illness. To ward off suspicion, Mew had used her psychic illusions to create a human-shaped puppet as a stand-in for Kuki’s legal guardian.

After the doctors ran a diagnosis on Kuki, the doctor took the human puppet aside in the waiting area. Mew could remember exactly what he said that day.

“It brings me much distress to have to inform you of this, ma’am. It’s concerning your daughter… She has… cancer.”

“Cancer?” Mew’s puppet asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes. We’ve examined her blood, and there’s no denying it. She has a rare form of leukemia, specifically. It’s a condition associated with a rapid production of white blood cells in the body.”

The puppet’s eyes widened, its emotions reflecting Mew’s own. “What? Can it… Is there a cure for it?”

“Unfortunately, there isn’t a known cure. There are existing treatments, but they’re hardly permanent solutions. Making matters worse, it seems your daughter is already in the final stages of the illness.” The doctor took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. He looked up to meet the puppet’s eyes again. “This is off the record, but maybe it'll bring you some consolation… At the very least, let her enjoy her life to the fullest while it still lasts.”

Her mind returning to the present, Mew pulled her arms out of Kuki with a huff, and reverted them to their original size. Kuki’s condition had stabilized for the time being, and she slept soundly as if nothing had happened.

Yveltal craned their head back, crushing the edges of the drawer as they sank their claws deeper into them. ‘Sooner or later, Mew, you will have to let us collect. After all, even your genesis has begun to lose its effectiveness.’

‘You don’t know tha—’ As if Yveltal’s words had jinxed her, a crack appeared on Kuki’s face.

Yvelted tilted their head. ‘Oh? It seems something interesting is about to occur.’

Mew’s heart sank. The crack soon began to spread, and more appeared across Kuki’s body. Mew trembled, unable to understand what was going on. Cracks had never appeared on Kuki’s body when she used her powers on her before.

Yveltal didn’t seem to react further. They remained still, watching in silence.

‘No… why is this happenening?!’ Mew shot Yveltal a glare. ‘Did you do this?!’

‘No, this is not of our doing. We only collect, we do not act.’

Mew turned her face back to Kuki, whose body was crumbling with no signs of slowing down. Her heart drummed uncontrollably, and she didn’t know what else to do. She made her body glow again and poured more of her power into Kuki. ‘Stay with me, Kuki. I’ll save you!’

However, the more Mew used genesis on Kuki, the faster the cracks grew and spread. By the time Mew realized that, it was already too late, and Kuki’s body began to disintegrate into white dust.

Mew’s mouth hung open. She watched helplessly as Kuki’s body completely vanished into nothing, leaving behind only the dress she’d been wearing just seconds before. Several thoughts ran in her mind, and yet she just sat there, completely frozen.

‘How disappointing. We shall take our leave now.’ Yveltal raised their wings and vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving Mew to her thoughts.

Mew clenched her paws. She lowered her head and tears began to well up in her eyes. ‘I couldn’t save you Kuki, just like I couldn’t save anyone back then. I’m sorry…’

She covered her face with her paws, tears dripping down her muzzle. She sniffled and stared blankly at the spot where Kuki had been before. Mew considered taking Kuki’s dress and burying it, as that was how humans took care of their deceased. Her girl deserved a proper burial after all.

When she levitated the dress, something fell out of it. Mew gasped, her gaze following it as it rolled across the carpet. She placed the dress aside and approached the object until it was just by her feet.

‘What the...? What is this?’

Mew picked it up and gave it a good stare. The object was a dark blue orb about the size of a pokeball. Not only did it feel warm, but a faint blue glow pulsed through it every few seconds. While Mew scrambled her mind to understand what she was even holding, she gasped when a realization hit her.

‘Did Kuki turn into this?!’

Mew glued her ears to it, but she could hear nothing but silence from the orb. She drew it away from her face and went back to staring at it. She drew a blank on what to even make of the orb. After sitting there for a long moment, she decided she needed to pay Uxie a visit. Perhaps she would know what to do…

 

[Adamhuarts]

Chapter 3: Blinding Light


In the present day, Uxie was spending her time in a museum’s lower library. She meditated atop one of the highest bookshelves, cloaked by her invisibility so no one could see her. Uxie heard the faint murmurs of humans down below, and the rustling of pages being turned over. Watching those seeking knowledge always brought a smile to her face.

Every once in a while, Uxie would leave her meditation spot and hover around the library. She would levitate over the heads of those struggling to focus. Sometimes, she would lend them her power to sharpen their minds, other times she’d observe how they overcame their struggle. She always kept her help subtle to divert suspicion, and they would just go home thinking the rumored fairy had helped them.

When she wasn’t observing the fraught ones, she would hover around those immersed in their books. She had a particular interest in a certain blonde woman that visited the library quite often ever since she was a young teenager.

Uxie approached the woman without revealing her presence. She quietly levitated beside her, watching as she studied under a mountain of books.

Hours went by, but the woman continued to study even after the skies darkened. Uxie knew what she was studying for, as she’d already read the girl’s mind. Eventually, the woman got too tired to continue, and decided to postpone her studying to a later time.

Uxie moved out of the way as the woman stretched her arms and adjusted her glasses. She returned the books to their respective shelves and then gathered her notes. After wearing back her funny looking green hat, she made her way for the library’s exit.

A smile tugged at Uxie’s lips as she sat on the table, basking in silence now that she was alone. Perhaps one day she would reveal herself to the woman.

‘Uxie!’

Uxie stiffened from the sudden call. No one should have been able to see her in her cloaked state, no one normal at least. And judging from the voice, she knew just who it was. She turned around with a sigh.

‘To what do I owe this visit, Mew—’ The first thing she noticed was the orb Mew clutched tightly to her body, then she raised her eyes towards Mew herself, whose cheeks were visibly darkened by tears.

‘Uxie! You have to help me! I… I was…’

Uxie hummed. Mew was struggling with her words, and she was holding onto that thing even more tightly as she spoke. It was unusual to see Mew in such a distressed state.

‘Take it slow, Mew, and lower your voice.’

‘Oh, sorry.’

‘Good. Now before anything else, how about a friendly greeting like you always do when we meet?’ Uxie asked. ‘How have you been? Did you manage to find a way to save that human of yours?’

Mew averted her gaze from Uxie. She bit her lip and frowned. ‘… That’s what I came to talk to you about.’

‘Interesting. Come, let us go elsewhere more appropriate so we may speak.’

Uxie lowered her cloak, and Mew reciprocated as well. After leading Mew to a hidden chamber in the museum, she looked at her and waved her paw. ‘Alright. Tell me what happened.’

Mew promptly told her everything, starting from what happened since their last encounter, to how she’d been trying to prolong Kuki’s life. After Mew was done, silence dawned upon them for what felt like a whole hour.

‘Mew…’ Uxie began. ‘I warned you using the genesis on that human was risky, unpredictable and far from an ideal solution!’

Mew shrank back and shook her head. ‘I knew that! I didn’t stop looking for other ways, but there was nothing else I could do! It was the only thing that seemed to work, and I…’ Mew paused, then sniffled.

Uxie groaned and shook her head slightly. ‘I am partly to blame for giving you the idea in the first place, though I did not expect you to keep dousing your human with genesis for two whole years. I’m surprised nothing catastrophic happened until now.’

Mew winced, raising the orb she held. ‘Why did she turn into this thing, Uxie?’

Uxie hummed. Why indeed? ‘Allow me to investigate that orb you’re holding.’

Mew stared at her for a few moments then reluctantly passed it to Uxie. When Uxie held it, she could tell from a glance how dense it was. She tilted her head, running her fingers across the glossy exterior. She spent a few minutes just staring at it, humming every few moments, then turned her gaze to Mew.

‘I have an idea on what actually happened.’

Mew leaned toward her. ‘You do?’

‘The moment you first used the genesis on her, she stopped being human.’

Mew widened her eyes. Uxie elaborated further. ‘You know how your gift of genesis is used to restore and spring forth new pokemon species whenever a mass extinction occurs?’

Uxie paused, then Mew raised her eyebrows. ‘And? What does that have to do with what happened to Kuki?!’

‘Think about it. Genesis doesn’t revive lost species; it creates entirely new ones. When you use that power, it disperses from you and spreads around. That spread out power grows diluted and eventually creates new lifeforms. It is the very gift of life itself.’ Uxie’s expression then turned dark. ‘So, tell me… what do you think will happen if you keep channeling that energy into someone in its unfiltered state? And not just anyone, but a human, a species that did not originate from you?’

‘I don’t know… I didn’t use it on anyone like that before Kuki.’

‘Is that so? Then allow me to explain more. Whenever you used your power on her, it didn’t spread out or become diluted, but rather, it most likely tried fusing with her soul, because there’s simply nowhere else for it to go. That is why her soul stopped being fully human from that point on.’

‘But then… how… Mew got less sick whenever I used it on her. How do you explain that?’

‘It wasn’t making her better. That was merely a side effect. The body is only an extension of the soul, and she appeared healthy because her soul was occupied trying to fight back against the assimilation.” Uxie paused, her slit eyes staring into Mew. “But you just kept adding more and more to her, like dousing flames with fuel. Your genesis wasn’t losing its effects. It was her soul’s power to resist being engulfed.’

Mew hung her head low. ‘So, you mean I was just making things worse? I… killed Kuki?’

‘No, you didn’t kill her,’ Uxie said, handing the orb back to Mew. ‘The genesis didn’t destroy her soul; it became a part of it. If I had to guess, she turned into that orb because at that point there was far too much more of your power in her, and she couldn’t maintain the shape of a human any longer.’

Mew clutched the orb tightly and shuddered. ‘What’s going to happen to her now?’

‘Give it a year,’ Uxie said simply. ‘At the very least, I predict that’s how long it would take for her soul to fully merge with the genesis. After that, something else will likely emerge from it.’

Mew’s eyes lit up. ‘So, you’re saying she’s going to come back?!’

‘Probably, but the question you should be asking yourself is what will emerge after the assimilation? Will your girl re-emerge as a human, or a pokemon, or some other thing entirely?’

Mew furrowed her brows and looked down in thought. So, Uxie continued. ‘It is difficult to say for now. However, when she does emerge, I want you to bring her here. I would like to see what becomes of a human that’s had their humanity stripped from them.’

Mew frowned. ‘What do you mean by that?’

Uxie cleared her throat then spoke. ‘I’m just saying that since we don’t know how she’ll emerge, there’s the possibility that she’ll become someone you could no longer recognize.’

Mew grew tense, clutching Kuki’s orb even tighter. ‘Kuki will still be Kuki, no matter what happens to her. She is my daughter, and I believe in her.’

Uxie hummed. Mew using the word ‘daughter’ piqued her interest. ‘I admire your confidence. If Mersprit were here, she’d shower you with comfort and consolation. Azelf would’ve commended your courage, but I can only tell you the reality in front of you.’ Uxie drew closer to Mew, staring at Mew through her slit eyes. ‘You must be careful and prepare yourself for what is to come. You do not want your daughter to end up like him.’

Mew went silent for a long minute. Her gaze wandered around the room, then she clenched her paws and glared at Uxie. ‘That won’t happen. I know it won’t. I won’t make the same mistake twice, no matter what.’

Uxie placed her hand on Mew’s shoulder. ‘Then promise me you will live up to those words, Mew.’

‘Don’t worry, I absolutely will!’ Mew exclaimed.

Uxie smirked. ‘Very well then. I’ll see you again when she emerges.’

Mew nodded and flashed a smile. ‘Yeah. Thank you again, Uxie. You really are the wisest person to talk to.’ After saying that, Mew teleported away.

With her guest gone, Uxie returned to her meditation spot in the library. Her mind kept going back to her meeting with Mew. Her hands wouldn’t stop shaking, so she took a deep breath to clear her mind. Mew and Kuki seemed really close, even when Mew brought her two years ago. Uxie couldn’t help but wonder… how would the girl react to having her entire world changed forever when she returned?

All these unnecessary thoughts… I’m starting to act like you, Mersprit.

***B***​

Time passed since Mew went to Uxie for help. Days became weeks, weeks became months. Eventually, a year had passed, but Kuki had still not emerged. Even when Mew went back to Uxie, she couldn’t explain the anomaly. She advised Mew to wait longer, as it didn’t matter how long it took, because time was meaningless to either of them.

Another half a year went by, but every new day Mew had to wait felt agonizingly slow.

Mew woke up on a random tree branch in the middle of nowhere one day. She was in the form of a minccino for some reason. She gasped and quickly inspected herself, sighing in relief after finding Kuki’s orb tucked beneath her, where she remembered placing it before.

Mew sat up and yawned. ‘What was I even doing here again? Oh right, I was messing around with those pokemon.’

She sighed, staring at her reflection on the orb. She used her tail to wipe bits of bark off it, then she reverted to her normal form. The orb glowed for a second in her paws, and Mew’s mood fell as quickly as the orb dimmed.

Mew sighed again, then turned her gaze to the sunrise . ‘Let’s go home, Kuki.’

Mew teleported back to their island. The sun had yet to rise there. Usually, Mew would have stopped to listen to the waves beating against the shore, but she didn’t feel like doing that that morning.

She went straight to the lighthouse, unlocking the door with telekinesis and then hovering to the room in the basement. When she got in, she noticed how stale the air felt. She wondered how long she’d spent away from the lighthouse. It was probably because staying there only reminded her Kuki wasn’t around anymore.

Mew flicked the lights on and activated the ceiling fan, then she left the lighthouse door unlocked so the air could get freshened up again. She turned her gaze to the bed in the room. In the past, she’d have found Kuki sleeping soundly there, waiting for Mew to wake her up.

Mew approached the bed and ran her paw across its frame. ‘It’s so dusty…’ Mew groaned.

It was about time she swept the floor, changed the bedsheets and dusted the shelves in the room. She didn’t want Kuki finding dust everywhere when she returned. Mew placed the orb in the shelf where Kuki stored her movies, and she noticed it glow for a few seconds before dimming again.

Mew narrowed her eyes at it. Is it just me or has it been getting glowy more often lately? She shrugged off the thought. The last thing she needed was to give herself false hope. It crushed her enough having to wait a year.

Mew grumbled and shifted her form to a mr mime, then she got to work. It took her about half an hour to clean the room up. After that, she took a quick bath and dried herself up.

She settled on the carpet after she was done, lying with the orb next to her. She stared idly at it, and would nudge it back and forth every once in a while. ‘When will you come back, Kuki?’ Mew asked, lowering her eyes.

‘Are you even going to come back? Maybe you really are gone forever.” Mew closed her eyes and slapped herself. She sat up and groaned. ‘What am I saying? I need to think positive. It’s not like I’ve been waiting a century for you to come back! Yeah, I must have patience, mmhmm.’

The orb glowed twice. Mew stared at it, averting her gaze as she chuckled. ‘Yeah, you’re probably saying I don’t have to worry about anything, right?’ Mew said, lifting the orb in her paws.

‘That’s right. No matter how long it takes, I’ll keep waiting for you, Kuki,’ Mew said, hugging it. When she did, it lit up again, the glow lingering for some seconds before dimming back down.

Mew hummed, and narrowed her eyes at it. ‘Could it be? No… but just maybe… Argh! I just have to try anyway!’

Mew placed the orb back on the carpet, then she hovered to the box stashed with papers in the corner. She rummaged around for a bit, pulling out Kuki’s old Movies in A Nutshell book, then she hovered back to it.

‘Look, Kuki, it’s your favorite book! I’ve been reading it since you were gone, see?’ Mew said, but there weren’t any reactions from the orb. ‘I can read the words, but I don’t really understand any of it. Funny, isn’t it?’

Still no reactions. Mew bit her lip then returned the book to the stash. Mew then drew something out from behind the box.

‘Do you remember our kite, Kuki? We had fun playing with it, right?’ Mew asked, hovering the kite around the room. The kite had a few holes in it and looked worse for wear. They shouldn’t have flown it during bad weather… In any case, it was not enough to cause the orb to glow, so, Mew returned it to the back of the box.

Her mind blanked out as she stared at the pile. I need a way to draw a stronger reaction, something like… That’s it!

Mew zipped toward the movie shelf and pulled a CD case. She inserted the disc into the player after switching their tv on. A catchy tune played in the opening sequence. Mew wanted to groan from hearing it, but stopped herself when the orb began glowing again.

Mew widened her eyes and held it up. ‘It’s working! Kuki, you remember this song, right? It’s from your favorite show with the lota—I mean Lotus Prince.’ Mew chuckled. ‘See? I even got the name right this time.’

Mew relished in the warmth coming from the orb’s light, and she held it tightly against her body as the show continued to play. Now she was certain about it. Kuki was definitely coming back to her soon, and she felt tears creeping down her face from joy.

The orb’s glow then began to fade, and Mew’s heart thumped. ‘No, no, no, no, you’re almost there, Kuki!’ Mew cried, but the orb only dimmed more and more.

Mew’s mind raced for what else she could do to make the orb glow brighter. Should she play more of Kuki’s movies? No, Mew feared the glow would fade before she could change the discs. Then maybe if she read some of Kuki’s favorite books, or maybe…

Mew drew her brows close and teleported to their courtyard with the orb. ‘Kuki, we’re in the courtyard now. You remember, right? This is where we do all our silly plays together!’ The orb’s glow was still fading, but Mew took a deep breath and continued.

Mew squinted her eyes and changed their surroundings, making it appear like the throne room from their last play. ‘Remember the last one we had? We never got to finish it because I ruined it… I still want to know how it’s supposed to end. I also promised I’d take you to the theater, remember? We were also gonna go to the amusement park that day, weren’t we? We would have had a lot of fun, but none of it ever happened.’

Her efforts proved futile. The orb had stopped glowing, returning to its dark opaque color. Mew pursed her lips and hovered to the ground. She curled herself up and hugged the orb, then she closed her eyes. ‘I miss you, Kuki.’

A scorching heat forced her eyes open, and she quickly let go of the orb. It was glowing again, brighter than it ever had to the point Mew had to shield her eyes from the light. The orb’s blue light illuminated the entire courtyard, and its light could probably be seen from miles away.

Mew winced, the burn marks on her fur vanishing as she healed herself. She wondered what was going on, but she couldn’t approach the orb. There was too much heat and light coming from it. Mew grit her teeth harder and forced herself to look, so she could see what was really going on.

Mew parted her lips slightly, watching as the orb’s form melted, then it began to shift shapes rapidly. It would maintain a form for a fraction of a second before shifting to another, but Mew was able to recognize every one of those appearances. It was the forms of all the pokemon Mew had created.

Eventually, the form shifts gradually slowed down after a few seconds. She remembered Uxie’s words, and she wondered what form Kuki would take. Mew’s widened eyes when she saw it take a human silhouette, one she was undoubtedly sure was Kuki’s, raced in anticipation.

The silhouette lingered for a solid minute, which prompted a confused look from Mew. Then, Kuki’s form shifted yet again, shrinking down to a much smaller appearance. After that, the bright light began to dim, and Mew realized Kuki’s form wasn’t going to change another time.

‘What? Are you for real?’ Mew muttered, immediately recognizing the appearance Kuki had settled on.

Mew watched the light fade away until all there was left was Kuki in the epicenter, hovering a couple feet off the ground. Mew gasped, darting forward to catch Kuki before she reached the ground.

Mew’s heart drummed, watching intently as the layer of light surrounding Kuki fizzled away. Mew observed Kuki’s features while holding her in her arms. She had turned into a form identical to Mew’s in most regards, but Kuki was blue… and fuzzier? She also looked only half Mew’s size.

“Mew…” Kuki said weakly, snapping Mew out of her thoughts. Kuki still had her eyes closed, and she seemed to be asleep.

Mew felt warmness welling in her chest from hearing Kuki’s voice after waiting so long. With tears flowing down her face, she hugged Kuki tightly. ‘That’s right. I’m still here for you, Kuki. I’m here.’

 

[Adamhuarts]

Chapter 4: Like A Kite

Kuki’s head spun when she woke up. She couldn't muster any strength in her body. She felt like closing her eyes and going back to sleep. Kuki wondered where she even was, but figured she must've been on a bed from the soft blanket beneath her.

She yawned, blinking twice as her eyes grew moist. Her surroundings told her where she was exactly. She saw the mirror drawer, her movies collection shelf and their TV sitting on the opposite side of the room. She was in her room like she’d never even left. However, everything looked way bigger than she remembered. Was she having a dream?

Kuki stared idly at the TV and yawned. After about a minute, she could muster enough strength to move her fingers, but something felt out of place the moment she moved them.

“Huh?” Kuki narrowed her eyes and raised her hand towards her face. There was a fuzzy blue paw in place of her fair skinned hand. She shouted with a gasp. “Huuuuuuuuuh?!”

Kuki jerked back. She felt even more fur when her paw brushed against her body. Her heart pounded uncontrollably in her chest as she pushed back against the wall beside her bed.

The cat-like ears on her head, the long rabbit-like hind limbs, the long tail with a life of its own... None of them were things she was supposed to have! Did she turn into Mew?

In her increasing panic, she let out the most horrified scream her small body could muster. Tears gushed down her muzzle, and her heart pounded even louder. It was loud enough that she could hear it through her ears.

It had to all be a dream, one she’d just wake up from soon. However,every sensation on her skin as her fur brushed against the wall suggested otherwise. That wasn't all. Her other senses were sharpened considerably. She could see, hear the breeze brushing against the other side of the lighthouse walls and even smell the cosmetics locked in the mirror drawer. Everything felt too real to be a dream, and that realization made her sob even harder.

She caught a glimpse of a pink figure darting into the room through her blurred vision. It was followed by an all too familiar voice.

‘Kuki! Are you okay?!’

Mew held Kuki up and wiped her tears for her. It was only when Mew stood before her that Kuki realized how smallher current form was.

“Mew?” Kuki asked, her eyes half open and filled with uncertainty. She opened her eyes wider. “Is it really you?”

Mew smiled. ‘Of course, it’s me! Who else would I be? Oh, you poor thing. You shouldn't be crying like that.’

Kuki sniffled, but Mew pulled her into a tight hug before she could do anything else. Kuki's panic dissolved into the warmth of her body.

‘There, there, Kuki. There’s nothing to worry about anymore!’ Mew said cheerily.

Kuki smiled back at Mew, though it didn’t last. She remembered her current situation, and her heart drummed again. “Something’s wrong, Mew. I-why am I a pokemon?! How…” Kuki leaned forward, but almost toppled over before Mew held her up again.

Mew patted her softly on the head. ‘It’s a really long story, Kuki. I promise I’ll explain it all to you, but first you need to recover your strength.’

Kuki didn't have the energy to protest, not that she would have. She didn't take her eyes off her as Mew laid her back on the bed. Mew excused herself out of the room and appeared shortly after with a huge bag of berries.

Kuki was able to perceive the myriad of delicious scents from the berries all the way from her bed before Mew had even brought them out. Her mouth salivated in anticipation of the taste, and she instinctively reached her arms out towards Mew.

Mew chuckled at Kuki. She then pulled out a few Oran and Chesto berries from the bag. Kuki had grown impatient and crawled off the bed. She fell with a thud and whimpered.

‘Kuki!’ Mew dropped the berries and rushed over. She found her trembling with her eyes sealed shut. Mew sighed and rubbed Kuki's cheek to calm her down. ‘Take it easy, dear.’

Kuki held onto Mew weakly, her breaths shallow and forced. She opened her eyes again when a tangy scent tickled her nose. There was a pink glowing Oran floating in front of her within reach.

‘Here, Kuki. You’re still weak, so eat it slowly,’ Mew said, hovering the Oran into Kuki's paes.

Kuki nodded, then she sank her teeth into the offering. Her face melted in delight. The berry had a rich citrus flavor and was as sweet as three buckets of sugar. Mew must've found only the ripest ones for her.

Her strength rapidly returned after her first bite. Kuki knew berries had strange effects on pokemon unlike in humans. All the soreness in her body washed away so quickly! Kuki cooed softly at Mew, raising her paws towards the other berries.

Mew smiled and hovered more to her. It didn’t take long until half the berries had been eaten. She didn't feel full no matter how many she ate, but she didn't really feel hungry anymore either.

‘Okay Kuki, I think that's enough for now. Let's save the rest for later, okay?’ Mew patted her on the head and sealed the berry bag.

Kuki wiped the corners of her mouth and frowned with flushed cheeks. “I wasn't—there's no way I could've eaten all of that!”

Mew giggled, flicking off a berry bit on Kuki's muzzle. ‘If you say so.’

Kuki grumbled. She looked up at Mew with lowered eyes. “Umm… did you turn me into a pokemon, Mew?”

Mew jerked back slightly. ‘Wh-how did you know?’

Kuki raised her brows. “Um, It’s not really hard. I sorta look just like you right now.”

Mew brought a paw to her cheek and laughed nervously. ‘Oh, yeah. You’re like a mini me now. A mini mew!’

Kuki tilted her head. “Why did you turn me into a pokemon, Mew?”

Mew's smile faded. She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed. ‘You’d been asleep for the past year and a half.’

Kuki gasped. “What? Wait then how old am I now?!” she counted on her fingers with furrowed brows. "I'm already fourteen… I slept through my birthday!"

‘Well, sorta. That’s not all that happened though,’ she said, taking Kuki's paws in hers. "I'll tell you everything now, so listen carefully."

***B***

​

“I… I died?”

‘No… not really,’ Mew said hurriedly as Kuki began to shudder. ‘It's sort of like how a caterpie turns into a metapod and then evolves into a butterfree.’

She turned into a metapod? Kuki found that comparison a little confusing, but chose not to question it. At least her body wasn't trembling as much anymore.

‘Look on the bright side, Kuki! Now, you’ll be able to do all the things I can do!’

“All the things you can do?”

‘Yeah! So, there’s no need to be upset about it or anything, okay?’

Kuki pursed her lips. “But…”

Mew hugged Kuki again and patted her head softly. ‘It’s okay, Kuki. You’re here, and that’s all that matters.’

Kuki didn't know what to think, but at least the warmth from Mew's embrace was comforting.

‘So, how’re you feeling now, Kuki? Are you thirsty or are you still hungry? You can finish the rest of the berries if you want. We can always get more later.’

Kuki eyed the berry bag and pursed her lips. “I don't really feel hungry anymore. But I sort of feel weird though,” Kuki said, running her paws against her fur. “I think I’m even seeing colors I didn’t even know existed before.”

Mew chuckled. ‘That’s totally normal, Mini Mew.’

“You’re not gonna start calling me Mini Mew from now on, are you?” Kuki asked with flushed cheeks.

‘Oh come on, it sounds adorable!'

Kuki hummed, then stared down at her feet. She drew her brows close and tried to take a step forward, but she ended up smacking her face on the ground while trying to bend down on all fours.

‘Kuki!’ Mew quickly pulled her up. ‘Are you okay? What… were you doing?’

Kuki looked up at her and groaned. “I was trying to move. Why are my arms so short?!” she whined, flailing her arms.

Mew laughed light heartedly, which brought another groan from Kuki. ‘Well… it’s not like we ever need to use them for anything, right? We’re psychics and all. If you need something—' a rubber ball flew into her paw '—you just make it come to you.'

"Ooooooh, yeah that's right!"

"My, my, you can’t even walk… how am I gonna take you to see Uxie now?’

Kuki gasped and her tail sprung up. “Aunt Uxie?! I can't remember the last time we saw her. Are we gonna see Aunt Mersprit and Azelf too?! Aunt Uxie is kinda boring.”

‘Oh silly, she's not boring. Well, only a bit. You know, we're not actually sisters.’

“Aunt Mesprit said you were though,” Kuki said, tilting her head.

‘Well, it depends on how you look at it. Arceus made them right after making me, so they are my sisters if you look at it like that… Anyway, enough about them. Let’s get going now.’

Mew waved her paw and surrounded Kuki in a pink bubble. ‘There we go. Until I teach you how to levitate, I’ll be carrying you around like this. I hope it's comfy in there.'

Kuki gasped and pressed her paws against the wall of the bubble. It felt smooth and elastic. “Whoa! I haven’t been in one of your bubbles since I was like… five! I’ve missed this so much!”

‘Weren’t you always the one saying you could walk around on your own whenever I bubbled you?’ Mew asked with a hum.

Kuki’s turned the other way with flushed cheeks. “That was before. Besides, I can't walk right now anyway!”

Mew laughed briefly. She then hovered to the bubble and latched onto it. Kuki's heart fluttered when Mew lifted the bubble off the ground. She recalled her childhood memories, back when Mew would take her along and fly around over canyons and cities.

Kuki pressed her cheek against the bubble and sighed. Oh, I wish I could float around just like Mew… Hold on a minute.

“Wait!”

Mew looked down and tilted her head. Her eyes glowed blue from the interrupted teleport. ‘What’s wrong?’

“Mew, teach me how to fly!”

‘Fly? But you can’t even shapeshift yet.’

Kuki squinted her eyes and failed her arms. "No I meant… like how you float around! Teach me how to do that. I bet I can totally do it just like you!"

Mew brought a paw to her chin and hummed. She lowered the bubble to the ground and popped it with a paw swipe. ‘Well, I still don't know just how much like me you are now.' Mew ruffled Kuki's fur, a habit she seemed to be quickly developing. 'Self levitation was the first thing I learned how to do way back when I was even younger than you. It's probably not gonna be hard for you to learn it either.’

Kuki balled her fists and bounced on her feet in excitement. “Awesome! I’ll be able to do it then?!”

‘You’re Mini Mew. Of course you can!’

Kuki bounced on her feet excitedly. "Tell me how! What am I supposed to do? How does it work?”

‘It’s a bit hard to explain. It's like trying to describe what color is to a zubat. It's something you have to feel for it to happen.’ Mew said as she flicked her hand. 'Let's see, uhhh… Try jumping and then stay up in the air. Kind of like how a pidove takes off. 'Can you do that?’

Kuki hummed and waved her paw. “Oh, please! Watch me!”

Kuki leaned forward and stood on her toes. She raised her tail, kicked back with all her strength and leapt forward. Then she fell flat on her face. Mew snorted and Kuki groaned at her in response.

Kuki rolled back to her feet and did it again only to be met with the same results. She did it again and again, leaping back and forth around the room, almost crashing into the wall once had Mew not stopped her in mid air and lowered her back to the ground.

‘Aww, look at you. You’re like a buneary now,’ Mew said with a chuckle.

Kuki grumbled and lowered her eyes. “This isn’t working. Isn't there a faster way to get this right?”

Mew brought a paw to her chin and thought. ‘Well I suppose there is one thing we could try.’

“Really?! Tell me, tell me!” Kuki sprung her tail up and bounced towards Mew. Her eyes gleamed with excitement.

'Here's what we're gonna do. I’m going to lift you up a bit and then let go. When I do that, you’re going to make yourself float by yourself, okay?’

Kuki drooped her tail and tilted her head. “Say what now?”

‘You heard me.’

“Wai- hold on! I'm just gonna fall if you drop me. I don’t wanna!”

Mew giggled and patted Kuki’s head. ‘Then don’t, and you won’t.’

"But…"

'You have to trust me on this one, okay?'

"Okay…"

Mew held Kuki’s paws and gave her a reassuring smile. Slowly, Mew drifted up with her in tow. Kuki shuddered, gulping as she looked down. She didn't take her eyes off Mew even once.

‘Kuki, I’m gonna let go now.’

“Wait! I’m not ready!”

‘I know you can do it Kuki. One, two, three, off you go!’

Kuki shrieked, gravity showing no mercy. She sealed her eyes shut and flailed. When that failed to slow her fall, she bit her lip and braced for impact.

Mew teleported to the ground and created a pink bubble under Kuki, breaking the fall. Kuki shivered like she’d walked through a blizzard for hours. After realizing she’d stopped, she heaved a relieved sigh.

Mew giggled and popped the bubble. Kuki eeped, but she somehow landed on her feet. Her legs felt like wet noodles, so she fell back and sat on her rear.

Mew hovered beside her. ‘Are you alright?’

“Uh Huh. It was sort of scary though,” Kuki replied with a nervous laugh.

Mew raised a paw to her cheek and furrowed her brows. ‘Oh… maybe we should leave this for later then. I don’t wanna make you go that again since you’re scared.’

Kuki shook her head and puffed her cheeks. “It’s cause you didn’t tell me you were gonna catch me!”

Mew scratched her cheek and chuckled. ‘Well you wouldn’t have tried to levitate on your own if you knew I was going to. You’d have felt too safe.’

"How're you gonna teach me now then? Now that I know, the same trick isn’t really going to work a second time.’ Kuki crossed her arms and tapped her foot on the ground. A light bulb then lit up in her head. “Let’s do it this way then! If I stop myself from falling into the bubble, I win! But if you catch me, you win!”

Mew clapped her paws and smiled. ‘Of course, it becomes much more fun if we turn it into a game! Let's add one more rule to spice things up. You only need to levitate by yourself once to win, okay? However, it's game over if I catch you in my bubble ten times, okay?’

Kuki balled her fist and punched the air. “Deal!”

‘That’s the spirit, Kuki!’



Mew held Kuki’s paws and teleported them to the courtyard. The stench of burnt ashes filled the air around the courtyard, and Kuki gasped when she found a burnt circular patch on the grassy field.

Kuki held her snout and scrunched up her face. “What the heck happened here?! The grass… it’s all ruined! Mew, did you use flamethrowers here or something?!”

‘Oops! I forgot to clean this place up. Stand back a little, Kuki.’ Mew shifted into a pidgeot and blasted the ashes away with a gust. She morphed back to her normal form and stuck her paw into the soil. A green wave radiated from her and reverberated back and forth across the field, sprouting a new grass bed until it completely blanketed the burnt area.

Mew placed her paws on her hips and smiled proudly. ‘There! Nice and done!’

Kuki’s eyes gleamed after watching the display. She bounced on her toes and clapped her hands repeatedly. “Teach me how to do that too!”

‘Oh you, one thing at a time, Kuki,’ Mew said, poking Kuki on the snout. 'Right now, we're trying to learn levitation.'

Kuki rubbed her nose and gruffed. “Fiiine!”

‘Let’s begin our game now, shall we?’ Mew held Kuki’s paws in the same fashion as before. Kuki looked back at her with a smirk. Her paws weren’t trembling anymore. She had fire in her eyes.

Mew steadily hoisted them up until they were halfway up the height of the lighthouse. Kuki glanced at the ground beneath them, exhaling to calm her rapidly beating heart. She looked back at Mew then nodded. Mew smiled, then released Kuki’s paws.

Kuki’s fur danced in the turbulence and she spun around during her descent. She flailed her eyes to correct her fall and maybe even levitate, but she found herself looking at the familiar pink walls of the bubble again just a moment later.

‘Looks like this counts as my win!’ Mew chimed, sticking her head into the bubble.

Kuki leaned back against the bubble and huffed. “I’m gonna win next time!”

‘We’ll see about that.’ Mew pulled her head out of the bubble.

They did seven more rounds and Mew had won every single one of them. Mew was starting to feel like she’d won already. While Kuki was fired up at the beginning, she had a frown by her ninth loss in a row.

‘Only one round left Kuki,’ Mew said with a wavering smile.

Kuki huffed when Mew popped the bubble. She clenched her paws at first, then she relaxed them and lowered her eyes with a sigh. “This isn’t working. What am I doing wrong, Mew?”

Mew patted her on the head. ‘Hey, it’s alright if you don’t get it now. We can always do this again when we get back. We won’t be at Uxie’s place for long, okay? Besides, we still have one more round to go, so you still have a chance, Kuki!’

Kuki gazed at her halfheartedly. “You think so?”

‘Of course, so don’t worry about it, okay?’ Mew gasped and raised a finger. ‘I know what will help! Why don’t you try thinking of yourself as a kite? Kites float around right, so if you pretend to be one, maybe you’ll levitate too!’

Kuki’s eyes lit up and she smiled. “That’s a good idea! I wanna try it!”

Mew chuckled. ‘Alright then, up we go!’

Mew teleported them high up into the sky till they were almost near the clouds. Their island home looked tiny from up there, and Kuki almost felt dizzy from the altitude. She drew a breath and fixed her eyes on Mew’s.

‘Are you ready?’

“I am.”

‘Remember. You're like a kite, my little kite.’

Kuki chuckled. “Let’s do this!”

‘Off you go then.’

Kuki dropped like a rock when Mew let her go. She gritted her teeth and forced her eyes open, watching the island below gradually grow in size. She spread her limbs wide like an emolga and pursed her lips.

I’m a kite! She repeated to herself. It wasn’t hard to picture being one as she recalled when she and Mew were playing with the one she made the other day. Kuki closed her eyes, recalling how she couldn’t get it into the air by running like she saw on TV, then Mew had to create a gust for her instead. It was quite an enjoyable day, even if the fun was cut short by bad weather.

‘Kuki?’

Kuki snapped out of thoughts when her name was called. She found herself floating a few feet off the ground when she opened her eyes. Mew was already on the ground with a bubble ready for Kuki to land in.

‘You did it, Kuki!’ Mew chimed with gleaming eyes.

Kuki stared at her, then a smile slowly tugged at her lips. “I can’t believe it! I really did it, Mew!” In her excitement, she did a flip in the air, but then she kept on spinning in place. “Make it stop, Mew!” she cried out.

Mew laughed and held Kuki in place, much to the latter’s relief. ‘I’m so proud of you, Kuki. I knew you’d be able to do it!’ Mew said, hugging her tightly.

Kuki chuckled, then she squirmed out of Mew’s hold. “This is so exciting! But how do I move around?” she asked while floating upside down.

Mew giggled and flipped her back upright. ‘I’ll show you how to do the rest of that later, but you’ll probably get a feel for it yourself. However… Let’s go down for a moment.’

Kuki tilted her head. “Why? Are we going to Aunt Uxie already?”

‘Not yet. I just want to see if you can levitate on your own now, so I don’t have to drop you from the sky every time.’

“Okay!”



Kuki brushed her tail against the grass, watching in amusement that moving the new appendage had already begun to feel natural to her. She wagged her tail back and forth and even twisted it to form a spiral.

‘Alright, Kuki, try levitating off the ground on your own. Oh, you mustn’t jump to do it, okay? Else it wouldn’t count.’

“Okie dokie!”

Kuki stopped playing with her tail. She took a deep breath and remembered the sensation of weightlessness again.

“Look, Mew, I did it again! This is so cool!” Kuki chimed, bouncing on her feet. “I’m gonna miss this when I turn back to normal.”

Mew giggled. ‘You won’t have to miss it. You’re going to always be a pokemon from now on!’

“Really?… I’m not gonna turn back? Being a pokemon is nice and all, but I dunno…”

Mew tilted her head, noticing Kuki’s mood shift. ‘Well I don’t really know. Uxie can probably answer that for you. Besides, you’ll probably learn to shapeshift just like me, so you can be whatever you want!’

Kuki rubbed her elbow and pursed her lips. “Oh… okay!”

Mew patted her on the head and smiled. ‘Don’t worry about it, Kuki. Everything will be fine. Come on, let’s go.’

Kuki nodded. She hovered to Mew and then the two departed swiftly.

***A***​

Mew teleported them to Nacrene City . They had to wait until it was midnight to make sure there weren’t any people around. When the coast was clear, she teleported them into the library where they found Uxie stacking a pile of books.

‘I had been expecting you, Mew,’ Uxie said, turning around to face them.

Mew gasped. ‘Whoa! How did you know I was coming?’

‘I felt a surge of power from the direction of your home roughly a day ago. I figured you were bound to show up soon,’ Uxie said with a half shrug.

Kuki peeked over from behind Mew. “H-hi Auntie!”

Uxie turned her eyes to her and drifted closer to the pair. ‘Interesting. You’re Kuki, aren’t you?’

‘Aww, don’t be shy, Kuki. Weren't you all excited about coming before?’ Mew said, caressing Kuki’s head.

‘Come, let me have a closer look at you,’ Uxie beckoned with a hand towards her.

Kuki nodded. She hovered and sat in front of Uxie while avoiding eye contact. ‘You’re nervous because I look different than you remember, right?’

Kuki looked at her surprised. “Yeah! Being so small feels so weird!”

Uxie smiled and made a subtle hand gesture. ‘Is that so?’

Mew hovered forward with her paw over her chin. ‘Anyway, what do you think about her, Uxie? Is there anything about her right now that I should be worried about? Is she going to be fine?’

Uxie placed her hands over Kuki’s cheeks. She tilted Kuki’s head both ways and hummed again. Uxie then opened her eyes and locked her gaze with Kuki’s.

Kuki’s mind immediately grew fuzzy as she stared into Uxie’s eyes. She wondered if Uxie was using hypnosis on her, but she could still feel her surroundings and Mew standing beside her.

"Why are you looking… At me like that?" Kuki asked in her drowsy state.

'Kuki, do you remember anything that happened while you were in the orb?'

"Whu…? Not really."

'What is the last thing you remember before you woke up today?'

Kuki furrowed her eyes and hummed. "Mew said something bad happened to me while I was waiting for her to take me somewhere. I don't remember though."

‘I see,’ Uxie said, letting go of Kuki’s face.

Kuki rubbed her temple and groaned. Mew hovered over and held Kuki in her arms when she saw her wobbling in place.

Uxie shut her eyes back to slits again and looked at Mew. ‘As I expected, her memories are impossible for me to reach. It is no coincidence that she emerged in your likeness.’

Mew narrowed her eyes slightly. 'What do you mean?'

'She can create her own genesis. It is still weak, but it is growing. You can sense it too, can't you?'

Mew sighed. ‘Oh, so that's what it was? Here I thought it was going to be something scarier. If Kuki is just like me, that makes me much happier now.’

Uxie gave her a faint smile then hovered back to the book pile behind them. 'That's one way to see things, I suppose. You've created another Mew, one who may eventually be able to do everything you can do and possibly more. I don't know what the future may hold for you two, but I'd advise you do your best to guide her. I'll always welcome you here should you need some of my guidance.'

Mew nodded with a smile. 'You have my utmost gratitude, Uxie.'

Kuki finally gained enough strength to push herself off Mew. She looked at Uxie with worried eyes. “Auntie, am I going to be a pokemon forever?”

Uxie tilted her head. 'Probably, yes. Does being a pokemon bother you, Kuki? I suppose it's natural since it's much different than how you've lived your life to this point.'

Kuki lowered her eyes and clenched her paws. Mew pulled her close and smiled. 'It'll be alright, Kuki. Being a pokemon is great! You'll see.'

Kuki smiled wryly. Then she looked away and stared vacantly at the bookshelves in the room.



'Let's go home, Kuki.' Mew held Kuki's paw and nodded at Uxie. 'See you around, Uxie.'

Kuki waved her paw at her as well. "Goodnight, Auntie!"

'Goodnight, you two.'

Uxie sighed after the two left, staring blankly at a book she'd picked up. 'I wonder if more people were able to sense Kuki's awakening. To think that Mew was able to create another version of herself this way. I suppose now she'd feel less lonely about her existence.'

Uxie stared vacantly. She lamented not being able to see the Kuki's memories to confirm one last thing, but that would have to wait until later.

***B***​

Mew yawned when they returned home. She plopped on the bed and stretched her hind limbs. 'Phew, I sure am sleepy! Let's go to bed, Kuki.'

"Okie." Kuki's eyes lacked even a shred of exhaustion. She wondered if it's because of how long she'd been asleep before.

Kuki joined her on the bed and imitated Mew in stretching her limbs and laid beside her. The bed felt softer and many times larger. Yet another thing she'd have to get used to.

'I wonder what I'm going to teach you how to do tomorrow. Maybe I can show you how to turn invisible, or how to make other things float!' Mew giggled, then yawned again. 'That will probably be easier, but it takes a while to learn. It's okay, though; we have all the time in the world, right Kuki?'

"Oh… yeah totally," Kuki nodded passively, only half listening to Mew.

Mew closed her eyes and smiled. 'I can't wait for tomorrow to come. We're gonna have lots of fun.'

"Yay."

Kuki stared vacantly at the wall for the next few hours while Mew slept soundly behind her. Something bothered Kuki, and her chest had been feeling heavy for quite a while.

Eventually, Kuki sat up and sighed. She glanced at Mew beside her then she turned her attention to the TV across them. She stared at it for a minute, then she got up and hovered to it.

Kuki furrowed her brows and sighed. She considered turning it on, but she decided against it. Doing so would probably wake Mew up. She'd have to distract herself some other way.

Kuki glanced at the movie shelf on the room side. Her mood lit up a little. She floated to the third bookshelf on the top and drifted to the CD case on the middle left. The weight of the case almost dragged her down when she pulled it from the shelf. She heaved a relieved sigh and floated back to the ground.

Even though she couldn't watch it then, The Lotus Prince always brightened her up. She began to hum the opening tune to herself as she ran her fingers across the case.

I can't wait to become a star too someda—

That thought was cut short as soon as it came across her mind. She dropped the case and stared at her paws. Can she even still become a star? Did she even have to now that she's just like Mew?

Kuki shelved those thoughts for later. She returned to their bed, curled up next to Mew, and went to sleep.

 

[kintsugi]

‘So, you’ve made it this far, Explorer of Stuff and Things?’ Lord Genger said with a laugh.

hi yes remember the time I said I would read an entire fic like this? I am so glad there is more of this.
accidentally'd a 'Genger' here

‘Don’t be fooled. I have the high ground!’

It's an older meme, sir, but it checks out.

Mew Did the same, running at the girl with a grin. The two ran past each other as silence dawned upon them.

Random capitalization here on 'did'. I also don't know if "silence dawned upon them" is the right phrase that you want here -- I feel like you're going for the anime sillhouette/slice look, but that doesn't quite translate to text as cleanly.

“Of course, but you have to work hard for it. Everyone can change, and so can you!”

AMAZING.
also I'm in this picture and I don't like it.

It sounds fun, but I know I’m clumsy sometimes, so, if an oven is really dangerous, it’s fine if we don’t get it.

This is a remarkably mature statement for such a young child, haha.

‘We meet again, Firstborn, as we always do,’ Yveltal said. What came from their beak was a mismatch of several voices. It was as though they were making a sparse imitation of one.

oh no.

Kuki’s forehead was drenched in sweat, and blood was trickling from the corners of her mouth. When their eyes met, Kuki looked at her with tears and parted her lips.

OH NO.

However, the more Mew used genesis on Kuki, the faster the cracks grew and spread. By the time Mew realized that, it was already too late, and Kuki’s body began to disintegrate into white dust.

OH NO.

I really like the use of the Gengar play as a narrative device here. It's cute, it made me smile, it set up for the idea that blind optimism/shonen cries of "for love and friendship!!" aren't going to work out here. It's a really effective intro that contrasts wonderfully with the "well that escalated quickly" mood of the second half of the chapter.

I think your characterization of Mew and Kuki this time around is a lot more powerful, too. Their interactions feel a lot more earned -- less like a teacher/student and more like a parent/child, which again makes the segue into the proper plot a lot more impactful.

I'm a bit torn on my thoughts on the first half vs second half of this chapter. On one hand I think it's a really effective gut-punch to go from everything being amazing to Kuki getting Thanos'd; it sort of mirrors the cruelty of real life. On the other hand, in order for you to pull this off in this way, you have to drop a lot of exposition and new topics all at once, in an already emotionally-charged scene -- this ends up detracting from the emotions, I think. It's hard to process that Kuki is in real peril because the narrative focus becomes a bit jumbled: first we have to introduce Yveltal and their role in the pantheon as the collector, then we have to establish Kuki's cancer via flashback, then we have to show how Mew's (mis)use of genesis has been keeping her alive. The end result is that the emotional weight here gets buried because so much backstory has to get conveyed; you put the cart before the horse, so to speak. Instead of building up to a tragedy, it feels like you dangle the idea of a tragedy and then build backward to it, and then by the very end of the chapter we have to build forward again -- a little harder to follow.

Still. I really love the extra steps you've taken to show Mew and Kuki doing normal fun things and being normal fun people. Definitely didn't expect the Dying to happen this soon, and when it started happening I had a big "oh shit" moment, so I think you captured those emotions really well!

After sitting there for a long moment, she decided she needed to pay Uxie a visit.

This seems new? From the old draft? Curious to read on.

 

[kintsugi]

me again! dropping in rq

uwwuw

She always kept her help subtle to divert suspicion, and they would just go home thinking the rumored fairy had helped them.

this phwasing hewe confuwsed me a wittwe, since it wooks wike she's twying to make suwwe that no one thinks it's hew, buwt evewyone thinks it's "the wuwmowed faiwy" (which i intewpweted as uxie).

After wearing back her funny looking green hat, she made her way for the library’s exit.

not suwwe what "weawing back" means in this context, buwt awso -- is this bianca? UwU cuwwiouws to see what she's doing hewe.

‘But then… how… Mew got less sick whenever I used it on her. How do you explain that?’

oopsie i think u wanted "kuwki got wess sick" hewe

Another half a year went by, but every new day Mew had to wait felt agonizingly slow.

the passage of time in fic is weawwy hawd! OwO i don't weawwy have any foowpwoof advice, buwt this chaptew's timewine is a wittwe hawd to fowwow. Like wogicawwy it *makes* pewfect sense, buwt the feew of it is wwong -- the timeskip in the middwe makes it stwange to me, i think.

youw do this weawwy intewesting thing in uw chaptews so faw whewe thewe's basicawwy two distinct chaptews appended togethew. In the pweviouws chaptew, it was the wightheawtedness of the pway and then the gwim weawity of kuwki dying; in this one, it's uxie and the wibwawy (coow setting btw) and then kuwki being webown. Fow me the pweviouws chaptew wowked fow the same weason that this one fewt stwange -- in the wast chaptew, u weawwy benefitted fwom having a suwdden, dwamatic change in the pwot becauwse it weawwy fewt wike things got wowse ouwt of nowhewe. Buwt in this chaptew, u awmost *don't* want that, becauws u want to convey the feewing of things being the same fow a vewy wong time.

i awso think this wouwwd be a weawwy intewesting time to dive in to mew's, weww, existence! OwO six months doesn't weawwy seem wike it'd be aww that wong fow hew, since she's been awouwnd since pwetty muwch the end of time. She definitewy has mixed feewings~~ abouwt godhood vs huwmanity, buwt i feew wike she wouwwdn't tweat the passage of time the same as u ow i wouwwd, since she's seen so muwch mowe of it. One of the weawwy neat things abouwt pokemowph fics is how they offew an avenuwe to, wike, dig into what it means to be *huwman* and suwch -- which means that uw non-huwman chawactews, and uw semi-huwman chawactews, awe weawwy intewesting.

awso! OwO i wike how u cawwback to aww of the pwaces mew and kuwki uwsed to pway in the "come ouwt pws" section, buwt it awso sowt of gives a showtew impwession of time passing. Pawadoxicawwy, it makes the wewationship feew mowe shawwow, since it gives the sense that the onwy things that mew/kuwki did togethew awe the things that we've seen onscween. I think this moment is weawwy weww-done and pewsonaw, buwt i wouwwd've woved mowe wefewences to games they've pwayed/things they've done ouwtside of what was awweady shown, as that wouwwd make it feew wike thewe's a whowe wewationship that bwoomed and died hewe! OwO

i wove the wowe that u have hewe thouwgh -- the fuwsion of huwman and pokemon souwws!! OwO what happens to make uws huwman?? UwU mew and uxie definitewy behave vewy huwman-wike in this wowwd, so i'm vewy cuwwiouws to see how u'ww uwse kuwki to expwowe that divide.

(fool's!)

 

[DeliriousAbsol]

I read the first two chapters so far, and I can really see such a huge improvement in your writing since the previous one! (And your writing was good back then already!) This is a fantastic re-write, and you really grow fond of Mew and Kuki's relationship over those two chapters. They're very sweet together, and it's so sad.

Yveltal is suitably creepy. I'd never thought of its tail as having claws before, and to crawl down a wall like that... Yikes. It's like the thing of nightmares.

I've kind of made a link between Kuki's nightmare, her illness, and Yveltal's ominous red glowing. I don't know if that's deliberate or not, or if you are conveying something else that will make sense later? Just curious to this, as the nightmare chains seem to be significant in some way.

‘So, you’ve made it this far, Explorer of Stuff and Things?’ Lord Genger said with a laugh.

Well, hello there! XD I didn't expect the Explorers of Stuff and Things to get a reference here!

Also, this part here stood out to me. I don't know if it's meant to be one sentence, or if the second one is incomplete? I just wanted to raise it to your attention on the offchance.

She could feel the ice cream’s coldness through the bowl. While she was staring at the teal green colored dessert.

I'm really enjoying this so far! =D I'll try to catch up on the next two chapters ASAP.

 

[kintsugi]

realized how smallher current form

oop

hovering the Oran into Kuki's paes.

also oop

“Uh Huh.

I don't think this should be capitalized?

“Okay!”



Kuki brushed her tail against the grass,

gap here

Can she even still become a star? Did she even have to now that she's just like Mew?

tense change here

Mew must've found only the ripest ones for her.

I! Still! Love these little details. Very fun, very sweet.

Kuki gasped and pressed her paws against the wall of the bubble. It felt smooth and elastic. “Whoa! I haven’t been in one of your bubbles since I was like… five! I’ve missed this so much!”

Love this idea!

'Here's what we're gonna do. I’m going to lift you up a bit and then let go. When I do that, you’re going to make yourself float by yourself, okay?’

parent of the year, ladies and gentlemen

I think this chapter makes for a good breather episode. There's a lot that happened last chapter, so it's important to give your characters time to decompress. I think having the framing device of Kuki learning how to levitate makes for a really clever action plot while the rest of the stuff goes on in the background.

I wish we got to know a bit more about how everyone's feeling, though! There's a lot of physical reactions early on that make Kuki feel like a newborn to me -- she's flopping around, she can barely walk, her only real response is to scream/cry, and I thought that was a really interesting direction to take this reincarnation/rebirth thing. But it's a little tricky to get a gauge for how she feels by the end of things -- she's able to talk and understand stuff more clearly, but what are her thoughts on this situation? How does she feel? By the end there's a hint of how she may or may not be able to live her human life after this, but it'd be nice to have more of that throughout. I think there's a lot of room for conflict between Mew's "this is fine/everything is fine" mood, and I'm excited to see that unfold, but I do wish we got to spend a bit more time in Kuki's head.

Small detail! Mew and Uxie speak with ' and Kuki speaks with ". Is she not telepathy-ing, but actually talking? Can Mew (the species) talk normally? Is there a reason why OG Mew doesn't do that?

Still! Cute stuff, fun breather chapter, and I think we're moving into the main part of the fic now! Excited to see where that goes!

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Hi there! Here for the Catnip Circle, and this is my first time reading your work.

First up, I have to say that this fic really isn't my personal cup of tea, by which I mean I wouldn't normally read a story with this kind of premise or vibe. So what I've done is I've tried to think carefully about what kind of feedback would be useful to you rather than making much comment on the premise, narrative style, or character of the fic. It leaves me with a little less to say, but I figure it's a more helpful approach. If there's anything you'd like to know then by all means, ask me questions and I'll follow up. With that out of the way, let's go:

First off, Kuki is sweet and all, but she spends the bulk of this chapter being a passive, reactive character. In general, even in pretty low-stakes fiction, one of the most important things you can do for a protagonist is give them something they already really want, and have them intend do something about it. Kuki's cares are the whims of a very young child seeking diversion, which means I don't find myself rooting for her as such. Considering the premise of the story and that you already have a few hints of Kuki wanting to be like Mew, you could afford to play that up a bit and have her prod the issue a little more forcefully, in my opinion.

I say that she's a very young child - I only assume that she is, it was actually a little unclear to me how old exactly she's meant to be. She came off as about four or five years old based on the maturity of her dialogue, so I hope that's what you were going for. If you want to clarify it, you could sneak in an early line about how many summers she's seen so far. If you want her to come across as older than five, you could edit some of her more childish utterances to be full sentences and give her a little more understanding of concepts like Mew's relative physical strength to herself.

The incident in which Kuki dislocates her ankle rang false for me. A dislocation is a really serious injury, and not one sustained through a trivial stumble - which is what seemed to happen in this case, although it was a little unclear. Even a serious sprain can have an adult with a low pain tolerance weeping; a dislocation is painful in its own right and often comes with both a sprain and broken bones. I'm sure a young child like Kuki would be practically shrieking with agony if she dislocated her ankle somehow. You might want to amend the injury to a mild sprain for the sake of plausibility, or make her react with much more grievous pain by the same token.

Kuki's nightmare is pretty rough, and I find myself hoping that it's either somehow prophetic, or a memory mistaken for an imagining. It suggests that Kui's so-far idyllic and low-conflict life either has or will have more ominous elements to it. I assume that something like this is the case, since that's generally why people include terrible nightmares in early chapters and this is at least the second she's had. My personal take here is that making it overt that the nightmare is more than just a dream - possibly by making Mew's reaction to it more troubled - may help clarify to readers that there are some real stakes at hand. Also, that you could even afford to either move the full nightmare or add hints at Kuki's recurring nightmares to an earlier point in the story, and then end the chapter with an indication she's going to suffer more of them.

I hope that some of this feedback is useful to you, but fair play if none of it is relevant to the way you want to tell your story. Cheers to you for participating in the Catnip Circle; keep writing and have a good one! 😸

 

[Sike Saner]

Heya! I seem to recall popping in on a previous version of this story, so I thought I'd take a look at this version, too!

The leavanny motioned the girl over. ‘Here, help me hold this bag while I reach for those ones over there.’

Kuki received the bag, gasping when the weight pulled her a bit. “Geez, do we need all these berries?” Kuki asked, sweat dropping down her cheek as she went through the stash. And how was she able to carry all these easily with her thin arms?

‘You have to eat a lot if you want to get big and strong, don’t you?’ the pokemon said, its body glowing white for a few seconds as its body shrank. ‘That’s why we need every single one of them.’

“I guess… but you always eat most of them anyway, Mew,” Kuki replied with a pout.

My memory's foggy, but I feel like this entire scene is brand new. As such, it was a fun little surprise when the levanny turned out to be Mew, even though I knew of course that Mew factors heavily into this story.

‘Oh, I apologize for that, Kuki. The things I often do away from here on my own are too dangerous for a delicate human like you, but when you get older and stronger I promise I’ll take you out on my adventures more often!’ Mew said, holding Kuki’s hand with her tiny paws after hovering to her.

How am I only just noticing the single quotes on Mew's dialogue? This makes me intrigued about her method of speaking. Is it telepathy, or is she speaking another language and making it possible for Kuki to understand it by some means? Mew's capable of quite a lot, so either seems plausible.

‘Yveltal…’ Mew uttered, her body stiffening.

‘We meet again, Firstborn, as we always do,’ Yveltal said. What came from their beak was a mismatch of several voices. It was as though they were making a sparse imitation of one.

Yveltal! :D Now there's a face I'm always glad to see. Also I like the way they're described as sounding here. It's nice and freaky.

‘You must be careful and prepare yourself for what is to come. You do not want your daughter to end up like him.’

Oooh. Like whom, I wonder? Mewtwo, maybe?

Kuki grumbled. She looked up at Mew with lowered eyes. “Umm… did you turn me into a pokemon, Mew?”

Mew jerked back slightly. ‘Wh-how did you know?’

Kuki raised her brows. “Um, It’s not really hard. I sorta look just like you right now.”

Yeah, Mew, like... she can see, you know. :p

Kuki looked up at her and groaned. “I was trying to move. Why are my arms so short?!” she whined, flailing her arms.

Mew laughed light heartedly, which brought another groan from Kuki. ‘Well… it’s not like we ever need to use them for anything, right? We’re psychics and all. If you need something—' a rubber ball flew into her paw '—you just make it come to you.'

I bet carnotaurus would've liked to be telekinetic. :B

Kuki stared at her, then a smile slowly tugged at her lips. “I can’t believe it! I really did it, Mew!” In her excitement, she did a flip in the air, but then she kept on spinning in place. “Make it stop, Mew!” she cried out.

Pfff, whoops. Well, learning to move through the air is one thing. Learning to move through the air well is another. :p

'She can create her own genesis. It is still weak, but it is growing. You can sense it too, can't you?'

Mew sighed. ‘Oh, so that's what it was? Here I thought it was going to be something scarier.

Idk, Mew, I think that actually sounds potentially scary as it is. After all, there's the matter of the person Uxie was worried Kuki might end up like earlier...

She lamented not being able to see the Kuki's memories to confirm one last thing, but that would have to wait until later.

One last thing, huh. There's something to be intrigued about.

That thought was cut short as soon as it came across her mind. She dropped the case and stared at her paws. Can she even still become a star? Did she even have to now that she's just like Mew?

Could be dangerous to become a star, now that she's become one of the rarest and most sought-after pokémon in the world (and shiny to boot)! That said, she does have a mew watching over her. And probably the Sinnoh pixie trio, too. Time may tell, I suppose!

 

[DeliriousAbsol]

I'm all caught up now! And I'm really enjoying this. It's very sweet.

Uxie drew closer to Mew, staring at Mew through her slit eyes. ‘You must be careful and prepare yourself for what is to come. You do not want your daughter to end up like him.’

Mew went silent for a long minute. Her gaze wandered around the room, then she clenched her paws and glared at Uxie. ‘That won’t happen. I know it won’t. I won’t make the same mistake twice, no matter what.’

Dang, that's ominous. I'm intrigued to know what this means. My first assumption is she's tried to save a human before?

She had turned into a form identical to Mew’s in most regards, but Kuki was blue… and fuzzier? She also looked only half Mew’s size.

So... the cutest mew ever? =3

“You’re not gonna start calling me Mini Mew from now on, are you?” Kuki asked with flushed cheeks.

Yes.

I can't wait to become a star too someda—

That thought was cut short as soon as it came across her mind. She dropped the case and stared at her paws. Can she even still become a star? Did she even have to now that she's just like Mew?

Aww man :( I can't help but think she's going to have a very hard time adjusting. And Mew will probably regret transforming her, too. This ending carries a solemn note.

I noticed a mistake as I was reading:

‘But then… how… Mew got less sick whenever I used it on her. How do you explain that?’

I think this is a mistake, since Mew is talking about Kuki?

This is a great re-write, and I look forward to more in the future :)

 

[Cresselia92]

Oi there! Here I am with some catnip for your adorable psychic cat. Just make sure to not give it too much, we don't want a hyper cat (or do we?). :3

I'll preface by saying that I know nothing about the previous version(s) of the story, so whatever knowledge I could have absorbed from previous iterations will be completely missing for me. I hope that won't be an issue in the long run.

With this saud, here we go!

And how was she able to carry all these easily with her thin arms?

In the same way a Lucario can keep its head on its neck. Huh... strong muscles? :p

“Ooooh, I didn’t know that. I wish I was a pokemon too then,” Kuki muttered while staring down in thought.

Hmm! Careful with what you wish for, girl.

“I’m not letting you get away this time!” he mumbled under his breath as he unstrapped a pokeball from his belt. “Tibbles, pin her down!” The angered farmer yelled, hurling the pokeball at her to summon a herdier. The dog pokemon bared its fangs and darted towards Kuki.

That sounds a tad excessive as a measure to stop a child. I think something like "Don't let her get away!" would probably come across as less harsh while still making it clear that the farmer is angry.

“Oh no, he’s here, Mew! Let’s g—” Gravity pulled the girl down, causing her to twist her ankle. She shrieked and face-planted onto the ground, losing her grip on the berry bag. A sharp pain erupted in her leg and when she looked up, the herdier was only a few feet away from striking her.

Mew gasped, her ears propping up in alert.

Okay, there are two things that struck me as odd about this sequence.

First, it's the whole "Gravity pulled the girl down". I suppose the girl had started running by then and tripped up, or maybe the girl took a step back and fell. Point is that I find this part a bit unclear -- gravity doesn't just pull people down like this. :p Perhaps you could add some action that happened before gravity got to work.

The other part I find a bit odd is Mew's slow reaction. Like, I found it weird that Mew gasped and grew alert only after both the farmer and the girl shouted. Personally, I feel like this sequence would have flowed better like this: farmer shouts and sends the Herdier -> Mew gasps in alert -> girl cries out and falls -> Mew counterattacks

Mew had teleported both of them to safety. They were back in their small room in the basement of a lighthouse, one Mew happened to acquire after winning a bet against a certain old friend.

Huh, wait... if Mew can teleport, then why didn't she teleport them both before they were attacked? Teleportation requires focus or something?

Mew couldn’t help but laugh when Kuki said that. She sat back and watched Kuki enjoy her meal.


“Aren't you going to take any?” Kuki asked while nibbling on the berry she was holding.

There is a double space between these two parts.

Kuki giggled as she returned the tray back to its place. “I know. You always are.”

Mew winked at the girl. ‘Aww, you know me so well.’

Not going to lie, the whole exchange between these two characters was really sweet. ~^^~

Mew peeked over Kuki’s shoulder to see what she was doing. She made an ‘ah’ sound when a realization dawned upon her. ‘So, this is why you took those things from that human shop the other day?’

Hanging around a Pokémon sounds like a bad influence. I bet Kuki used to be a Purrloin in a past life, what with her thief habits. :p

Kuki pouted with her arms folded. “The instructions were too complicated. I couldn’t follow them at all! There were like fold it like this, and like that. There were pictures, but they were no help,” Kuki said while drooping her shoulders.

I can relate. Origami are complicated. If you meet a Kartana someday, you could ask them to help.

Mew giggled as she flicked off a small bit of paper on Kuki’s nose. ‘Let’s leave that till tomorrow, dear. You’re tired right now,’ Mew replied, holding Kuki in her arms as she transformed into an audino.

Hmm, I wonder how young Kuki is now. According to the Dex, an Audino is around 1.1 m, so Kuki must be very young to be held in an Audino's arms. Maybe around... eight or so? But then, her language seems a tad sophisticated at places for an eight-year-old girl, so I can't really pinpoint her actual age.

With what strength she could muster, Kuki held onto Mew’s hand and met her eyes. “Mew, will we always be together?”

Mew’s eyes widened at the sudden question, then her expression softened to a smile. “Always, Kuki. Always.”

“Yaaaaay…” With that, Kuki finally fell asleep with her body resting limp in Mew’s arms.

Ah, this question never has a good answer, especially if the child is young.

She bit her lip when her voice echoed back toward her. Kuki sighed, marching on and hoping she could find a way out somehow.

CLACK!

Kuki’s body stiffened at the sound. She slowly turned toward where it came from, widening her eyes when she saw a red viscous bundle of chains crawling toward her. She screamed and bolted forward, not once stopping to turn backwards again as she ran with all her might.

Clack!

CLACK!

CLACK!!

Kuki fell when something pulled on her leg. She gazed back in horror upon seeing that the chains had caught up to her. Looking at them up close, they had a burning glow to them and a dark aura rising off them like smoke. Kuki raised a hand to untangle her foot, but the chain quickly seized her arm. Raising her other arm led to the same outcome, and she soon found herself completely restrained

Whoa, that's quite the mood whiplash! There is also a missing dot at the end of "restrained", but that's irrelevant.

When Kuki turned her gaze, she saw a pink light orb facing her. She squinted her eyes at it, tilting her head and wondering what it was. She felt a familiar warmth, drawing her closer to it. When she touched it, it dissolved into her body, making her body radiate a pink glow.

Right after that, the clouds began to shatter like glass all around her. Before she could even stand, she’d already lost her foothold, screaming as she fell into the abyss.

Ooh! Foreshadowing? :D

Kuki felt her eyes watering up when she saw Mew. With tears running down her face, she suddenly pulled the pokemon into a tight embrace.

Mew’s eyes widened for a moment, then she lightly stroked Kuki’s forehead with her tail. ‘Did you have a nightmare again?’

“Mmmhmm.”

‘Everything’s okay now, Kuki. I’m here for you. I’m here,’ Mew said, smiling softly.

Aww! Don't worry, Mama Mew is there for you! ^^

----

Alright! Time for the general thoughts about this chapter!

I've got to say that it was a really sweet start to the story: A girl and a Mew living together in a lighthouse, doing only fun stuff and games. What child wouldn't want to have a legend as a friend? :D

Though, I really wonder how was Kuki's life before being adopted by a Mew, and how much she has lived among humans? As I have peeked at the next chapter as well, a part of me thinks that she actually does stuff like going to town and school, and Mew simply uses a human disguise for the more "human-related" matters, like checking things with teachers or accompanying the girl in shops and whatever. That would somewhat justify Kuki's knowledge of human things, alongside having access to a TV.

The nightmare scene was... really something. It definitely is a foreshadowing, huh? What kind of future awaits this little girl, I wonder?

Anyway, this was definitely a cute read! I'll see if I'm able to keep up with this story and maybe R&R again in the future. :3

See you around! ^^

 

[Equitial]

Chapter 1

I wish I was a pokemon too then,

If you say so Kuki!

To start with, a solid opening chapter! The first half chapter was absolutely adorable and established Mew, Kuki, and their relationship really well. I liked the idyllic-ness. Nothing too exciting happened, but I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. The tone that was created was enjoyable on its own, and it was nice just watching Mew and Kuki be cute together.

The fluffiness of the first half of the chapter also made the second half way more disturbing. The tone shift was almost jarring, and some vivid writing helped to amplify the effect. I didn't expect this amount of creep after the cute first half, so it made a really memorable ending. Good job.

Moments I liked from the first chapter:

With a hum, she tucked herself under the blanket next to Kuki, a smile on her face as she closed her eyes.

Aww!!

She bit her lip when her voice echoed back toward her. Kuki sighed, marching on and hoping she could find a way out somehow.

CLACK!

Kuki’s body stiffened at the sound. She slowly turned toward where it came from, widening her eyes when she saw a red viscous bundle of chains crawling toward her. She screamed and bolted forward, not once stopping to turn backwards again as she ran with all her might.

Clack!

CLACK!

CLACK!!

I like the use of onomatopoeia here, and the descriptions of the chains crawling toward Kuki used some very nice word choices.


Chapter 2

Everyone can change, and so can you!

You can, Kuki! And soon!

Unfortunately, I think there are more issues with this chapter. In particular, the second scene feels drawn out and somewhat unnecessary. Reading it right after Chapter 1, the two chapters' fluffy content felt to similar. There wasn't much of note that happened -- Kuki's desire to become an actor is introduced here, but that's only a small bit of info. Mew's actions seem to conflict with her previous attitude. She's too protective to let Kuki use an oven, but she displayed none of this cautiousness when she took Kuki out to collect berries when she knew there was a angry farmer suspicious of them.

This chapter also has a structure similar to the first -- a fluffy beginning with a sharp turn into creep -- but I don't think it played off quite as well this time. Part of this is due to the fact I didn't find the first half as engaging, but Ch. 2 in general feels more oddly paced. Kuki's illness is something that could have used some foreshadowing before the reveal. It feels unrealistic to have Kuki being fine and cute in the first half, then having her suddenly drop dead in the second. Even if that weren't weird, it still would have probably come off better if, say, some of Mew's actions towards Kuki referenced that she knew Kuki was ill.

Despite my misgivings about the build-up, I do like the second scene. The drama and Mew's reactions were really compelling. And Yveltal. Yveltal's portrayal here is really distinct and effective. I like how they're portrayed as a collection of beings in one body. In particular, I liked this detail:

Yveltal said. What came from their beak was a mismatch of several voices. It was as though they were making a sparse imitation of one.

I also like how despite their attitude they really aren't evil, just doing their job. It helped to make Kuki's death more tragic.

I do think the backstory of Kuki having cancer probably would have been better off told after the fact, though. Inform the reader that Kuki's ill, of course, but more details could have been brought up later, not during the actions.

Moments I liked:

The entirety of the first scene. I liked how it showed Kuki's interests and creativity and Mew using her abilities to make Kuki happy. It's a great opening -- very cute and fun.

Mew then hovered over her and held out her arms. Her fingers disappeared as her arms grew three times in length, tapering at the tips. Her whole body shone in a bright pink color, then she stabbed her needle-like arms into Kuki’s chest.

Mew using her genesis was described in an unexpectedly violent way that was potent and grabbing. It really demonstrated how Mew would stop at nothing to keep Kuki with her. In the same vein, I liked this piece of dialogue:

‘I know what will happen. I’ll give Kuki part of my power, her body will heal for a while, I’ll get to spend some more time with her, then you’ll rear your ugly head here and start blabbing nonstop again. Rinse and repeat.’

Chapter 3

Ooh, I like Uxie! Her introduction set her apart as a legendary with a completely different personality from Mew. It was interesting seeing them interact. I know she gets another scene in the next chapter, but it'd be nice to see her more, especially with Kuki there, to see how the girl responds to a person who's an opposite from her mom.

Uxie cleared her throat then spoke. ‘I’m just saying that since we don’t know how she’ll emerge, there’s the possibility that she’ll become someone you could no longer recognize.’

Mew grew tense, clutching Kuki’s orb even tighter. ‘Kuki will still be Kuki, no matter what happens to her. She is my daughter, and I believe in her.’

Uxie hummed. Mew using the word ‘daughter’ piqued her interest. ‘I admire your confidence. If Mersprit were here, she’d shower you with comfort and consolation. Azelf would’ve commended your courage, but I can only tell you the reality in front of you.’ Uxie drew closer to Mew, staring at Mew through her slit eyes. ‘You must be careful and prepare yourself for what is to come. You do not want your daughter to end up like him.’

Mew went silent for a long minute. Her gaze wandered around the room, then she clenched her paws and glared at Uxie. ‘That won’t happen. I know it won’t. I won’t make the same mistake twice, no matter what.’

Damn, I really liked this bit. There's a lot going on with hints of lore/backstory, but mostly I love Mew's conviction for Kuki. I really felt it when she called Kuki her daughter. We've already seen their relationship, but Mew stating it like that really hit me. In general I just love how much Mew cares for Kuki. I love the two's dynamic.

After that scene, however, I have some misgivings about the time skip. I don't think a time skip's inherently bad in the middle of a chapter, but passing over the year and a half in just two paragraphs makes the time span feel empty. Obviously Mew was doing something, but the way it's presented it just feels like a blank. If it had been expanded, maybe, with some summary or mentions of things Mew had been doing, it would have felt better to me.

The lack of information makes some of the next events lack weight or feel contrived. For example:

She went straight to the lighthouse, unlocking the door with telekinesis and then hovering to the room in the basement. When she got in, she noticed how stale the air felt. She wondered how long she’d spent away from the lighthouse.

I like this detail, but I had no suggestion until now that Mew had been avoiding the lighthouse, so it feels a bit out of nowhere.

I love how Mew interacted with the orb in the second scene, When she took it into Kuki's old room it was ahhhhh so heart-wrenching and adorable afsdfasfgasfg. The whole sequence was so sweet and sad and I personally loved all the callbacks. They really helped me feel emotionally connected to the scene and I could really feel what Mew was feeling. It's surprising that I can be so invested in these characters only three chapters into the fic.

Other moments:

It would maintain a form for a fraction of a second before shifting to another, but Mew was able to recognize every one of those appearances. It was the forms of all the pokemon Mew had created.

This little detail is really interesting. I like the lore given about Mew's genesis, btw, and I really like the concept given here. I don't know yet how much power Kuki will have now that she's a Mew, but this bit suggests at least as much as her mother, but Kuki was previously a human and is only a child.

but Kuki was blue… and fuzzier?

I approve xD


Chapter 4

Aww, this chapter was cute! I think this is the chapter with the most amount of fluff, which is a nice break after three chapters of dramatic events. I was basically smiling throughout the whole chapter. I also loved how the kite thing was brought back, btw

It had to all be a dream, one she’d just wake up from soon. However,every sensation on her skin as her fur brushed against the wall suggested otherwise. That wasn't all. Her other senses were sharpened considerably. She could see, hear the breeze brushing against the other side of the lighthouse walls and even smell the cosmetics locked in the mirror drawer. Everything felt too real to be a dream, and that realization made her sob even harder.

I really liked how you portrayed Kuki's confusion at waking up in a new body in this chapter. I particularly appreciated the above passage. It's a interesting point that Kuki's perceptions have completely changed since after becoming a new species; the specific examples given are nice details. Her initial distress was also very moving. I really wanted to give her a hug.

My only issue with the chapter is that Mew felt a little off. I feel like more emotion should have come from her -- relief, worry, something. She feels a bit too much like her usual self, even though the previous chapter demonstrated she was affected by Mew's change.

Now that Kuki's a Mew, I'm interested to see where the story will go! Uxie and Mew have dropped hints about possible backstory that could come into play, and Kuki is having more trouble adjusting than she's letting on. The latter is interesting because Mew doesn't seem to catch onto this at all. She even seems like she wouldn't be able to understand if it does.

Kuki lowered her eyes and clenched her paws. Mew pulled her close and smiled. 'It'll be alright, Kuki. Being a pokemon is great! You'll see.'

She and Kuki have a close relationship, so this could be one of the first times they come into real conflict with each other. However it turns out, I'm interested to see how Kuki adjusts as more time passes.

Despite how she may feel about it, some instances of Kuki being cute with her new Mew body:

“I think I’m even seeing colors I didn’t even know existed before.”

Kuki brushed her tail against the grass, watching in amusement that moving the new appendage had already begun to feel natural to her. She wagged her tail back and forth and even twisted it to form a spiral.

In her excitement, she did a flip in the air, but then she kept on spinning in place. “Make it stop, Mew!” she cried out.

xD

Kuki joined her on the bed and imitated Mew in stretching her limbs and laid beside her. The bed felt softer and many times larger. Yet another thing she'd have to get used to.

 

[Cresselia92]

Well, well, well! Guess what? I'm here with the second portion of catnip for your lil' cat! :3

Just make sure to not give too much of that stuff. The last thing we need is an already energetic cat to become hyper, haha!

So, without further ado, let's tackle Chapter 2 of your story!

“Prepare to be vanquished, Lord Gengar!” Kuki cried, a cardboard sword in hand and wearing a squirtle costume with a papercraft hat.

‘So, you’ve made it this far, Explorer of Stuff and Things?’ Lord Genger said with a laugh.

Kuki raised her sword toward the sky. “Yes, I have! You’d better be prepared, because your reign of terror comes to an end now!”

To help Kuki immerse herself even more in their play, Mew even changed their surroundings with illusions to match the descriptions Kuki had written in their scripts.

The play is such a cute idea, but I really wish we got to see how the illusions actually looked like. It would have helped a lot in getting a clearer idea of the kind of play. From the fact that we have a lord and a throne, I suppose they are pretending to be in a medieval setting, but I really wish we got to see it.

Mew had also played the parts of all the defeated generals.

Similarly, I wish we got to see the part of the generals, too. It didn't have to be anything too long. Maybe, for a quick idea, there could have been four generals who are the dark counterparts of Elite Four?

‘Don’t be fooled. I have the high ground!’

“Oh yeah? I have an even higher ground than you do!” Kuki said, standing on her toes.

“Meeew! You’re ruining the play!” Kuki said with a pout.

‘I’m sorry, it was just too much!’ Mew said, hands over her mouth while she burst into laughter.

Kuki puffed up her cheeks, pouting even harder.

‘Okay, I’ll stop. Let’s continue,’ Mew said, wiping a tear from her eye.

Kuki dropped her cardboard sword. She turned the other way and squatted. “I don’t feel like playing anymore!”

Anime!Iris' words echoed... "Don't be such a kid!" :p

I really feel like Kuki is a bit of a spoiled brat. Mew, every heard of discipline?

Mew hovered to her other side to face her again. ‘I know what will cheer you up! Let’s go have some ice cream!’

“I don’t want any!”

Mew smiled slyly. ‘Are you sure? Not even a teeny bit? They’re even Lum berry flavored, you know.’

“… Okay, maybe a little bit,” Kuki said, groaning in defeat.

Mew giggled. ‘That’s what I like to hear.’

Ah, yeah! Nothing's better than some good ice cream to cool down a fiery emotion! ^^

They returned to their room in the lighthouse basement. Mew had brought the ice cream from the refrigerator by the time Kuki was done changing into her normal dress. She added three large scoops into Kuki’s bowl and handed it to her.

Okay, serious question mark: How did they get all those appliances? Like, did Mew steal a refrigerator or something? 🤔

“I know…,” Kuki said, holding the bowl in her hands. She could feel the ice cream’s coldness through the bowl. While she was staring at the teal green colored dessert.

That is a weird break between "bowl" and "while". I think it was supposed to have a comma there?

“Oh, then I would make lum berry ice-cream with chocolate cookies!”

‘That does sound yummy.’

Oh, it sure does!

...Great, now I want ice cream. :p

‘How about we start with learning how to make ice cream first instead? It sounds less dangerous.’

“But I want to bake a cake,” Kuki said, taking a spoon from her ice cream with downcast eyes.

Sheesh! Kuki sure changes her mind very quickly, huh? She wanted to prepare ice cream just a few seconds ago! XP

Kuki shook her head. “No, it’s alright. My dream isn’t to become a baker anyway, but to become a star!”

Hmm... you know you can bake and be a star at the same time, right? Those activities aren't mutually exclusive. :p

And nice to hear about her goal!

‘Oh yeah, you mentioned something about that before, didn’t you?’ Mew asked, taking a large spoon out of her ice cream.

..."Before"? Okay, when did that happen?

“I read all about it in this book you got me!” The book was titled Movies in A Nutshell.

Oh, what’s this? This world’s equivalent of Acting for Dummies?

“I don’t really know… There might be one in Nimbasa City! There are so many cool places there, especially the amusement park!” Kuki chimed with starry eyes.

Or PokeStar Sudios! That would be your best bet! But… hmm, I wonder, where do these two actually live? Like, with Mew’s teleportation they could go literally anywhere, so I have no clue in which region they reside.

Maybe you could add some extra pointers, like typical Pokémon and traditions?

Mew went out of the basement, humming to herself while she made her way to the other building connected to the lighthouse. She raised a brow when a lone black feather fell in front of the door before her. When she recognized it, her pulse quickened. The pitch-black feather, bearing red veins that coursed from its spine, belonged to none other than them!

Whoa! Talk about mood whiplash!

‘We meet again, Firstborn, as we always do,’ Yveltal said. What came from their beak was a mismatch of several voices. It was as though they were making a sparse imitation of one.

Now this is interesting. So Yveltal as an entity is made of multiple souls or something? Are Yveltal the Delightful Children From Down The Lane?

‘It’s only been three days. She’s perfectly fine right now!’

Yveltal cocked their head sideways. They laughed. ‘Are you certain about that?’

Mew widened her eyes, her body trembling in place. The bowls she had been holding fell on the ground, the noise snapping her back to reality. She immediately made a run for the basement room.

Oh my gosh! What’s wrong with Kuki? D:

Kuki’s forehead was drenched in sweat, and blood was trickling from the corners of her mouth. When their eyes met, Kuki looked at her with tears and parted her lips.

“It… hurts…”

Mew pursed her lips, a sour taste building up in her mouth. Kuki’s voice was weak, and she was barely hanging onto her consciousness. Mew held her close, tears forming in her eyes.

‘It’s going to be okay. I’m with you now.’

Holy Miltank! I would have never expected THIS to happen!

Yveltal leaned forward. ‘Her time has come, Mew, and we will help her pass on.’

‘Why? You’re only supposed to show up when a calamity is happening. Why are you trying so hard to take Kuki from me?!’

Oh, but it is a calamity, Mew: for you!

‘What you have spoken is true, but this situation piqued our interest. Just as we are supposed to appear during calamity, you are supposed to use your power of genesis only to restore what has been lost, after we are done collecting the fallen souls. Yet, you have been using it all on a human for the past two cycles. Outrageous!’

‘So what?! It’s the only way I can save her, otherwise…’

Hmm… Is it, Mew? If Yveltal exists, then I suppose Xerneas is around, too. I wonder why you didn’t ask them to lend a paw. What could be the reasoning?

Mew winced, but she brushed off the aura. She frowned and laid Kuki down. Mew then hovered over her and held out her arms. Her fingers disappeared as her arms grew three times in length, tapering at the tips. Her whole body shone in a bright pink color, then she stabbed her needle-like arms into Kuki’s chest. The energy from Mew’s body started pouring into Kuki, which evoked a growl from the displeased Yveltal.

Whoa! Energy transfusion? That’s an interesting concept.

‘Of course, it doesn’t make sense to someone like you. You only know how to collect, but I am different. For me, If I get to spend even one more moment with Kuki, then I’d do whatever it takes to save her,” Mew said, her expression growing bitter.

Mama Mew to the rescue!

“It brings me much distress to have to inform you of this, ma’am. It’s concerning your daughter… She has… cancer.”

“Cancer?” Mew’s puppet asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes. We’ve examined her blood, and there’s no denying it. She has a rare form of leukemia, specifically. It’s a condition associated with a rapid production of white blood cells in the body.”

Gosh dang it! That’s… terrible news! D;

As someone who had the daughter of a friend of my father dying because of leukemia, this truly hit home for me. ;-;

The puppet’s eyes widened, its emotions reflecting Mew’s own. “What? Can it… Is there a cure for it?”

“Unfortunately, there isn’t a known cure. There are existing treatments, but they’re hardly permanent solutions. Making matters worse, it seems your daughter is already in the final stages of the illness.” The doctor took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. He looked up to meet the puppet’s eyes again. “This is off the record, but maybe it'll bring you some consolation… At the very least, let her enjoy her life to the fullest while it still lasts.”[/I]

…Now I see why Mew has always tried to cheer Kuki up and let her do whatever she pleased: she is literally a ticking bomb. The poor kid! D:

Though, I’m surprised. Not even legendary powers can cure some illnesses, I see.

Yveltal craned their head back, crushing the edges of the drawer as they sank their claws deeper into them. ‘Sooner or later, Mew, you will have to let us collect. After all, even your genesis has begun to lose its effectiveness.’

‘You don’t know tha—’ As if Yveltal’s words had jinxed her, a crack appeared on Kuki’s face.

Yvelted tilted their head. ‘Oh? It seems something interesting is about to occur.’

Mew’s heart sank. The crack soon began to spread, and more appeared across Kuki’s body. Mew trembled, unable to understand what was going on. Cracks had never appeared on Kuki’s body when she used her powers on her before.

Yveltal didn’t seem to react further. They remained still, watching in silence.

Okay, now what? Cracks? Did Mew accidentally turn Kuki into a doll?

That scene reminded me a story from Junji Ito, where there were children who were turned in dolls because of an unknown illness and ended up cracking in places after passing away. It was… freaky, and this scene is quite freaky for a similar reason.

However, the more Mew used genesis on Kuki, the faster the cracks grew and spread. By the time Mew realized that, it was already too late, and Kuki’s body began to disintegrate into white dust.

Not sure whether I should make a “I don’t feel too good” or a “Undertale monster soul” reference here…

But still, gosh!

Mew clenched her paws. She lowered her head and tears began to well up in her eyes. ‘I couldn’t save you Kuki, just like I couldn’t save anyone back then. I’m sorry…’

“Anyone”? Now I’m curious, who is “anyone”?

Mew picked it up and gave it a good stare. The object was a dark blue orb about the size of a pokeball. Not only did it feel warm, but a faint blue glow pulsed through it every few seconds. While Mew scrambled her mind to understand what she was even holding, she gasped when a realization hit her.

‘Did Kuki turn into this?!’

Mew glued her ears to it, but she could hear nothing but silence from the orb. She drew it away from her face and went back to staring at it. She drew a blank on what to even make of the orb. After sitting there for a long moment, she decided she needed to pay Uxie a visit. Perhaps she would know what to do…

You know, my very first impression was that Mew had accidentally turned Kuki into a Manaphy’s egg and made her the first Manaphy ever. Though, that doesn’t seem to be the case from a quick peek, does it? It would have been a fun twist, though!

—-

Well, then! Here we are, at the end of the review. Gotta love how you made this chapter start all sweet and cute, and then bam! Illness, Yveltal, Kuki dying and disintegrating… that was a really rapid shift! And I suppose Kuki’s nightmare now makes sense, as it foreshadowed stuff.

A stronger chapter compared to the first one. Only thing that displeased me a little was that this chapter was very tell-not-show, which is a shame. I would have loved seeing how Mew recreated the play to give it life. It would have added more to the fairytale tone before the dramatic drop.

Anyway, aside from this and many unanswered questions, this was an enjoyable chapter. Definitely interested in seeing how things will develop from now onwards! ^^

Until next time!

 

[WildBoots]

Hi, Adam! So far I’ve only read the first chapter, but here are my thoughts so far:

Kuki is sweet and naive—she seems really young. She reminds me of the emojis you use in the discord server, actually! Haha.

You’ve painted a very calming scene here. We get tiny hints that something else might be going on ... but I think you could explore those sooner! For example, it looks like Kuki is pretty used to stealing things from the farmer and from the store. we know she’s scared of the farmer’s herdier, but we don’t know how she feels about the theft itself. Does she feel bad? Does she think it’s necessary? Etc. I also wish I knew at least a little about why she’s in the position of stealing and living with a pokémon in the first place because it would tell me a lot about her character: does she have a more somber side to her, or is she too naive to be able to fully process the situation?
Some line-by-line thoughts:

It was a pleasant afternoon. Kuki held her summer hat as a breeze washed over her, immersing herself in the rustling of swaying leaves. Idly, she stared at a round leaf she picked off her sleeve, admiring its green color.

I like that the second and third sentences show us actions—might be nice to start with those and show us that she’s enjoying the day through her reactions.

Here, help me hold this bag while I reach for those ones over there.’

It would sound more natural to me to say instead, “Here, hold this while I get those ones over there.” Then a quick sentence with her handing Kuki the bag and reaching.

Kuki asked, sweat dropping down her cheek as she went through the stash.

I kinda want this to be two separate sentences: ...sweat dropping down her check. She peered into the bag and saw (litany of berries, maybe a reaction?)

What in the—it’s you! You’re that thieving girl! Come to steal more of my harvests, have you?!” a loud voice barked.

I think “a loud voice barked” should come in after “it’s you!” It loses some of its momentum by coming at the end of the paragraph instead.

Gravity pulled the girl down,

I thought this was the herdier knocking into her at first and I was confused.

Mew crashed in front of it in the form of a swampert.

Ooh, crashed is a great verb here.

The herdier felt an odd pressure coming from its new enemy,

The focus has been on Kuki so far, and I thought it was jarring to jump into the herdier’s perspective, especially since it was only for a second. Are there physical reactions Kuki might observe that would give us this information instead?

Mew had teleported both of them to safety. They were back in their small room in the basement of a lighthouse, one Mew happened to acquire after winning a bet against a certain old friend.

Old friend? Hm!

I would either swap the order or these two sentences or drop “had.”

she said while forcing a smile.

You can drop the word “while” and replace it with a comma.

You won’t be able to walk unless it’s fixed, young lady.’

Maybe “until” it’s fixed?

pierced her joint.

“Joint” struck me as an odd epithet here. I wouldn’t mind it being ankle again, for clarity.

Kuki did as told. Shortly after, she felt her mind becoming light as clouds.

*As she was told. Light as clouds is a good image though.

quickly noticing the light bandaging around her foot.

This feels a little ungainly. It’s odd to me that she notices what it looks like first rather than the absence of pain. I’m also puzzling over the image of her looking around and then noticing, as if she doesn’t know where to look—she knows what’s injured!

Kuki had her head in the clouds, staring idly at the single light bulb on the ceiling. A slow smile found its way to Mew’s face. She wondered what the girl was thinking, but she’d once promised not to pry into the girl’s memories in the past. Besides, not knowing was part of the fun.

This didn’t evoke to me the somberness that Mew seems to be sensing. Instead of hopping into Mew’s head (and then not explaining anything), it would be great to get more from
Kuki here—body language that betrays how she’s feeling? A flashback?

Kuki’s mouth fell open. She held Mew’s paws tightly and her eyes gleamed. “You promise?!”

This made me think that Mew is being deceptive, placating her, but it’s played so I ironically that I can’t tell. If that’s the case, I’d like to see that played up more.

and she slowly glanced back and forth to perceive her surroundings.

This didn’t tell me much. Instead, you can show that she’s looking around by telling us what she sees.

The area was strangely cold,

*The air? Or the room? Area feels odd.

She bit her lip when her voice echoed back toward her.

Suggestion: There was no reply but the echo of her own voice. She but her lip.

Kuki felt the chains rapidly untangling her.

*Untangling FROM her. She’s not tangled, the chains are.

She found herself sitting in a bright lumpy area that resembled cloud tops.

Since this is a dream, why not just, “She found herself sitting among the lumpy cloud tops, bright under the sun.” As-is, it’s a bit muddled.

the lightbulb on the ceiling greeting her as she stared at it.

This felt a little too literal. Also! This room feels very bare. Is that intentional, and cheerful little Kuki doesn’t know the difference? Or are there other personal details around the room that would give us some insights into her character?

Overall, it feels like there’s something more sinister brewing under the surface and I wish that tone came through a little more. But cute chapter!

 

[Adamhuarts]

Chapter Five: It's All There?

In the few weeks since Kuki’s new life began, Mew had taken the time to teach Kuki how to master her all-new abilities. The first thing Kuki had to learn was the various forms of telekinesis, and she came up with a good training exercise to help Kuki get the hang of it.

Kuki was hovering rings through a number of twisted poles. Her task was to make sure none of the rings touched their poles even once while she moved them from one end of the poles to the other, else she’d have to start the exercise over from the beginning. The exercise had been fairly difficult the first couple times. Mangled poles and rings were strewn about the courtyard from her previous attempts in the past week.

'Almost there, Kuki!' Mew cheered from the sidelines while Kuki stiffened her face in concentration.

Kuki’s body radiated a faint blue glow while she steadily moved the rings through the poles. They trembled, and occasionally she stopped to take a break. It wouldn’t have been so difficult if the poles weren’t varied in length and shape, and Kuki had to get all the rings on the other side at the same time.

'Aaaalmost there… keep going!' Mew cheered again in a whisper. Kuki was really thankful for that, because she felt like her focus would collapse if Mew had raised her voice any higher.

With pursed lips, she pulled the rings further along. Using telekinesis was still so bizarre. It was as if she had several invisible arms floating around her at all times.

Finally, Kuki led the rings down the pole ends. They fell into place at the same time with a harmonious clang.

"I did it…” Kuki exhaled deeply. She slumped her shoulders and rubbed her forehead. “I finally did it! Oh yeah!" Kuki finished with triumphant flips in midair.

'I knew today would be the day you finally did it!' Mew chimed, clapping her paws.

“Really?” Kuki asked with a head tilt. She hovered down to the grass bed after a mild headache started tugging at her mind.

'Yup! I'm so proud of you, Kuki! Your abilities are progressing very well.' Mew circled around her with a smile. She doused Kuki with a yellow light and Kuki’s headache vanished almost instantly.

"Are we gonna do more training?" Kuki asked, a hit of reluctance in her voice.

‘Nuh-uh, you’ve earned a break for now,’ Mew replied with an apologetic smile.

Kuki smiled in relief and threw a paw up. “Yay! Learning telekinesis was so hard… I’m glad I don’t have to do it anymore.”

‘Things will only get easier from here, but there’s still a lot you need to learn,’ Mew said with a wink.

“When will I be like you, Mew?” Kuki asked with a groan.

'Well… You still have a long way to go,' Mew said, nodding with folded arms. 'But with how quickly you're learning, I think it should take you about… ten years to be as good as me!'

Kuki deflated and groaned even harder. "That looong?! I'm gonna be..." she counted on her digits then gasped. "I'll be more than twenty years old by then!"

'Time doesn't mean a thing to us, Kuki. Whether it takes a century, a millennium or even a million years, we'll have all the time in the world to do all kinds of stuff. I look forward to it,' Mew said with a reminiscent look in her eyes.

"A million years! How even old are you, Mew?!" Kuki asked, slack-jawed.

Mew giggled and waved her paw. 'Come on, I lost count ages ago. Just know that I've been around for a very long time.'

"Whoa…," Kuki said with starry eyes. "You're like… super ancient!"

'You could say that,' she said with a nervous laugh.

"Does that mean you're a super old granny?"

'What?! No! I'm not that kind of old old!'

Kuki stared blankly at her and then laughed. "I really don't get it, but I think it’s cool."

'You don’t really have to think about it much,' Mew said with a huff. She then turned towards the mangled poles and rings from Kuki’s earlier training sessions. 'Time to tidy this place up now that we won’t be needing these anymore,' Mew said, levitating a pole and teleporting it away. Probably to a random cave somewhere, or a trash heap.

Kuki stared at her work without saying anything. She wasn’t really sure what to do next. Should she go downstairs and wait, or…?

‘I’ll take care of this quickly. Head down to the room, okay?’ Mew said, glancing at Kuki over her shoulder.

Kuki nodded and twirled around to make her leave.

***B***​

As soon as she arrived in the room, Kuki plopped herself over the bed and cooed. Though it’d been weeks since she changed, she wasn’t yet fully used to being so much smaller than her old bed. Anyone would feel weird if they could fit on top of their pillow while only taking half the space on it.

Kuki turned to lay on her back and yawned. She flicked her tail up and down while humming a tune to herself. The TV was sitting on the other side of the room, and she stared at it vacantly. It reminded her of the many times she’d lie on her bed watching different shows until she fell asleep. One time Mew had to take the TV away because Kuki had spent two days watching nonstop while Mew was gone for an errand that took that long.

Kuki closed her eyes and smiled. It felt as if she was recalling a distant memory, yet it probably happened not long before she became a pokemon…

‘Lunch time!’ Mew said. A leavanny-woven sack full of berries levitated into the room. Mew hovered over the center of the carpet and then opened up the bag to reveal the ripened berries of several colors and sizes within. ‘Come on and let’s eat, Kuki.’

“Not hungry…,” Kuki replied with a groan.

‘Come now Kuki, I already told you. Even if you don’t get hungry anymore, nothing stops you from eating whenever you want anyway,’ Mew said, hovering to her and poking her cheek.

“But it still feels weeeeird!” Kuki said with an exaggerated groan. She shook her face away from Mew’s prodding and sat up to face her. It only felt stranger the more she let her mind dwell on it. She placed a paw over her stomach and grimaced. Kuki never felt hunger anymore, but she never felt full either. The only upside is that she could keep eating food endlessly without actually needed to stop for any reason. She and Mew were more like snorlax in that regard.

“Just… weird.”

‘You’ll get used to it sooner or later. Come on, the food isn’t gonna eat itself, Kuki,’ Mew said with a giggle, hovering an oran in front of Kuki’s face to tease her.

“I suppose I could take one or two,” Kuki said with a smile.

They hovered to the berry stash and sat on opposite ends of it. Kuki’s mouth watered from smelling the berry nectar up close. Their fragrance was so pleasant that she could almost taste it. Perhaps she’d be taking a berry or two more than she thought.

‘Bon appetit!’ Mew said, hoisting up a rindo.

“Hmm?”

‘Isn’t that what you used to say before eating? I’ve missed hearing you say stuff like that,’ Mew replied.

“I stopped saying that ages ago,” Kuki said with flushed cheeks.

‘How about doing it one more time for old times’ sake? Please, Kuki?’ Mew said, lightly tossing her berry between her paws.

“Alright, alright. I’ll say it.” She grabbed a nanab berry in her paws and stared at it for a moment. “Bon appetit!”

Mew smiled gleefully when Kuki said it, and the two then proceeded to dig into the berry pile. Within minutes, there weren’t any berries left. In the past, their meals had ended whenever Kuki felt full, and since that couldn’t happen anymore…

“Whoa, it’s all gone… Happens every time now,” Kuki said, holding the last nanab berry in her paw. She shrugged and downed it in a single swallow. “A single bag used to last us a whole week, too.”

‘And you said you weren’t hungry,’ Mew said with a smirk.

“I really wasn’t!” Kuki retorted with a pout.

‘I know. Just teasing. Still, I’m starting to get used to having to gather more food after every meal we have now,’ Mew said with a chuckle. She liked the berry juices off her paw then disposed of the now empty berry sack by teleporting it away.

Kuki perked up her ears when Mew implied she was about to head out.

“Can I come with you this time? Pretty please?!” Kuki sprang towards Mew, held her paws and even gave her a puppy eyes look.

Mew smiled wryly at her and freed her paw from Kuki’s grasp. ‘Sorry, Kuki. You should just stay here, okay?’

“But I wanna come with you! I promise I won’t cause any trouble! I can just stay put and no one will notice I’m even there!”

‘I know you want to come with me, Kuki, but…,‘ Mew began, petting Kuki softly. ‘You’ve only gotten a hang of telekinesis lately, and there’s a whole lot more you have to learn to handle yourself on your own. I can’t take you with me because things are different now.’

“I can take care of myself! If anything happens, I’ll just hide like I said!”

‘I know you said that, but you won’t even be able to blend in with people and crowds since you’re not a human anymore. Sure, I could probably spin a few illusions to keep you from prying eyes, but I don’t think you’re ready to go into the world like this. At least not until I can be absolutely sure I can keep you safe. The old tricks won’t work anymore, and I don’t want you getting hurt.’

Kuki wasn’t entirely convinced and only sulked harder. Mew sighed and held Kuki’s paw in hers. Kuki’s expression softened when she saw the look in Mew’s eyes, and she listened to her continue. ‘Some humans… sometimes even pokemon, can be terrible. The more special a pokemon is, the more they’d want to reach and hold onto them all for themselves.’

“What do you mean?” Kuki asked, tilting her head slightly.

‘You and I are both a very, very special kind of pokemon, Kuki.’ Mew paused and placed her other paw on Kuki’s cheek. Only the whirring of the ceiling fan filled the void of silence during her brief pause. ‘If you’re not careful out there in the world, something terrible could happen to you. And I may not always be able to protect you. I already failed once…’

Kuki furrowed her brows at her, but at least she had accepted what Mew was trying to convey.

‘Just stay put here, okay? I promise I won’t be out for too long.’

“Okay…”

‘That’s my Kuki!’ Mew said, hugging her tightly. Then she glowed her eyes and hovered in preparation to leave.

“Mew, wait!”

‘Huh?’ Mew asked, tilting her head.

“I… I don’t really want more berries.”

‘Kuki…’

“I want to eat sweets, or some chocolate. Maybe even ice cream or something! How about jello, I haven’t had that in forever… I think. Since I can’t go with you, I can have some snacks at least, right?” Kuki asked, rubbing her elbow while avoiding Mew’s gaze.

Mew huffed with a smile. ‘Okay then, I’ll get those snacks for you then. Anything else?’

Kuki shook her head and grinned.

Alright. Be on your best behavior before I get back.’ Mew gave her a wink, and then she vanished without a trace.

***B***​

Silence befell Kuki upon Mew’s departure. That was just the usual, wasn’t it? Before Kuki developed her strange sickness, she almost never left the island. Mew always had her stay in the lighthouse before then, and Kuki had never questioned it. And just when she thought she could be going out whenever she wanted, too…

Kuki stretched out on the carpet and sighed. What should she do in her free time while she waited for Mew to return? All she’d done since she had become a pokemon was train with Mew, or on her own whenever Mew went out foraging. She furrowed her brows and juggled a few ideas in her mind.

“Oh, I know what to do!” Kuki raised her head in excitement. When was the last time she’d made a new script for their plays? It felt like forever. She’d been so occupied with other stuff that she’d completely forgotten.

Kuki swished her long tail behind her with a grin. What kind of play should she write? It can’t just be something random. Something she could relate to would work. Well, she’d been asleep for over a year until a few weeks ago… Maybe she could write about someone in a dream. Not just that, it should be someone who could move between dreams! She held her paws together and smiled to herself. With a base concept to work with, all she had to do was work on the script, create new costumes and decide which roles to play.

Not wanting to lose grasp of the idea she’d just thought up, Kuki was compelled to write it down somewhere. She narrowed her eyes and scanned the room. Where did she leave her notebooks and pencils again? Oh, right. They should still be in one of the mirror drawers, so long as Mew hadn’t rearranged Kuki’s stuff while she was dormant in her orb.

Kuki leapt towards the mirror and landed with a soft thud. She peeked over the edge at the drawer handles and fixed her eyes on the lowest one. It was a good thing she’d gotten a good grasp of her telekinesis, and what better time to make good use of it for that matter? Kuki gave the bottom drawer a mental nudge, and it slid open without delay.

“Yes! I did it!” Kuki said to herself with a clenched paw.

Much to her relief, everything in the drawer had been left intact just the way she’d remembered it, if she overlooked the built up dust. Her old pink hardcover notebook was sitting in the left corner, just as always. It was the first notebook she’d finished. So many memories resided within it. There were also her various stationeries and crayons all huddled up on the opposite side.

The last notebook she had was sitting atop the others, and merely glancing at its black covering with the silvery ink that was used for the book’s title filled her with a dose of nostalgia. Though she preferred her other more colorful notebooks, Kuki insisted on having the black-covered one since it looked more professional, according to her. At least that’s what all the cool adults on TV used. Like Secret Agent Emma!

Kuki pulled the notebook to herself and placed it next to her. She blew the dust coating away with a puff and opened it with a smile. As she flipped through the pages, she recounted some of the plays she’d written in the last few years. There was of course The Explorer of Stuffs and Things, Northwind Witch and her best work so far which she named Theresia and The Earth Golem.

They were mostly inspired by the shows she watched on TV, but Kuki always made an effort to mix in her own twists and occasional original ideas in there just to keep things exciting. Mew was also a great help and assisted her in coming up with Northwind Witch’s story.

Kuki closed her eyes and recalled the time they were performing Northwind Witch. Mew had set up a snowy landscape illusion, and Kuki played a witch on a journey to bring the last flame to her people so they could have warmth again.

Odd. Kuki couldn't remember what her witch outfit during the play was, and she'd also forgotten what happened after the witch brought the last flame home. She shrugged then turned her face back to the notebook.

Almost half of its pages were still empty, even after all the stuff she’d written in it. That was great. It meant she could get right back to creating more scripts without having to wait for Mew to get her a new notebook.

Kuki peered over the edge of the drawer again and hovered a pen to her paw. Now all that awaited was to write her story and immortalize it.

“Here we go!” Kuki declared with a smile.

However, Kuki’s paw froze right as she raised the pen. Her arm was a bit… short. Her paw was even less dexterous than an infant's hand, even when she tried to keep a firm grip on the pen. Kuki bit her lip and frowned.

Perhaps even if she couldn’t comfortably hold a pen up with one hand anymore, she could at least use both paws to hold it up, right? Kuki held her breath. It looked like she could at least bring the pen down onto the paper without dropping it. In the end it was hardly a solution because every letter she wrote as slow and crooked.

After a botched attempt at writing a sentence, Kuki stopped.

It wasn’t really working…

What should she do now? Kuki pondered that while holding the pen tightly against her body. Her nose crinkled at the scent of ink wafting up from the page. Such a bothersome, sensitive nose. She never would’ve noticed the irritating scent in the past unless she had her face right up on the book.

A thought occurred to her right then. How about using telekinesis to control the pen?

“… It won’t hurt to try,” Kuki whispered to herself in a shaky voice.

Kuki took a deep breath and concentrated. The pen glowed a faint blue, her psychic powers engulfing it as she focused her will onto it. She hovered it freely above the paper and lowered it gently. With furrowed brows, Kuki proceeded to try writing with it.

It didn’t work out as well as she’d hoped. Even with all the training she’d done to hone her psionics, guiding a pen tip with enough precision to write small letters was far beyond what she was capable of doing at the time. She needed more practice. More work needed to be done.

Kuki frowned at the page she’d ruined with a series of illegible squiggly lines and released her psychic hold on the pen, letting it roll to the side. She rubbed her temples and groaned loudly, trying to come up with what to do next. If she couldn’t even write down her own scripts, then she might forget about them later. There had to be something she could do, right? But what had she not tried yet? Kuki stared down at the wooden surface of the drawer and clenched her paws.

What if she tried transforming? It made sense. If she could somehow turn back to normal, into a human, she’d be able to write much more comfortably. Kuki felt silly it wasn’t the first thing that came to her mind. She had become just like Mew, so she could probably shapeshift just like her as well, right? At least she hoped so, but there was only one way to know for sure. How did shapeshifting even work, though?

Kuki rubbed her chin. She swished her tail back and forth while thinking of any clues. Even though she could just wait for Mew to come back and ask her directly, Kuki was far too impatient at the time.

There was at least one occasion when Kuki asked Mew how her shape-shifting worked. It was a pretty mundane conversation, one which Kuki had thought very little of at the time.

‘And behold, now I’m a pidove!’ Mew declared, perching atop Kuki’s head.

Kuki clapped her hands with a gleeful smile. She reached up to grab Mew, and Mew hopped out of reach to transform into a Jigglypuff.

“Jigglypuff! Yay, are you gonna sing for me now?” Kuki asked, watching Mew bounce up and down.

‘Only when it’s bedtime,’ Mew said. She giggled and reverted back to her base form. Kuki followed Mew’s gaze while she twirled around her.

“Mew, Mew. How do you do that? Can all pokemon transform like that?” Kuki asked, because Mew was the only pokemon she’d known at the time.

‘Nope, I’m the only pokemon in the world that can become whatever she wants!’ Mew bragged with a wink.

“I wanna transform, too! Show me, please!” Kuki said, her eyes bright and starry.

Mew chuckled. ‘It’s easy Kuki. You just have to focus on an image of what you want to become, and then will yourself to become it,’ Mew explained, transforming into an eevee and flicking her tail at Kuki. ‘See? It’s not that hard!’

Kuki blinked twice and tilted her head. “I dun get it.”

‘Don’t worry about it, Kuki. I’m sure if you keep trying, one day you’ll be able to become whoever you want in your own way.’

After recalling that memory, Kuki couldn’t help but smile. How long ago had it even been?

It was in their same old room, that much she knew. Was Kuki's movie shelf even there before?

How long ago had it been? Kuki furrowed her brows. She couldn’t quite tell, nor how old she even was at the time.

Kuki shook her head and focused back on her current task. That’s right, Kuki now knew how Mew transformed… According to her confusing explanation, anyway. Focus on an image and then will herself to become it? What exactly did that even mean? Whatever, that was the only explanation she had to go off of. Knowing Mew, she’d probably just repeat those exact same words if she asked her again…

To begin her experiment, Kuki decided to keep things simple by transforming into a pokemon she was already familiar with. What if she turns into Mew? No, that’d be pretty redundant. She already was one. Then how about a pidove? Mew turned into that before, and it might be fun becoming a pudgy bird for once, right? Kuki chuckled, then closed her eyes and fell into a deep concentration.

Kuki furrowed her brows and pursed her lips. “Focus… focus on the image of a bird,” she whispered to herself.

A solid minute passed, but not a speck of change occurred within her, even though she kept repeating those words to herself. Kuki opened her eyes and frowned, then she turned around to face her reflection in the mirror. Staring back at her was the blue, fuzzy face she was still getting used to. Though, she was hardly weirded out by her appearance anymore.

Maybe there was more to transformation than just focusing on an image, but what exactly was she doing wrong? Kuki tried to concentrate again even more than before, just for good measure. The ticking of the wall clock made her twitch her eyes in annoyance, and her second transformation attempt was a fruitless effort yet again.

Kuki groaned and leaned her back against the mirror. It wasn’t working. It seemed she’d really have to wait for Mew to get back before she could learn how to transform, which sucked… but what if there was some kind of clue she’d overlooked in the memory she’d recalled earlier? Kuki brought a paw to her chin and began to think. It might have something to do with Mew’s body language, her words, or perhaps something unseen?

No. She couldn’t figure out any clues in those after all, none that stuck out to her as obvious anyway. Kuki swept her tail back and forth in irritation. Something fell over, and the sound tore her from her thoughts. Kuki groaned upon realizing she’d pushed her journal off the mirror drawer by accident.

“Gosh darn it,” Kuki muttered, hovering down to recover the book.

After picking it back up, she noticed it had landed on a particular page. It was from a play based on The Lotus Prince, one she’d completely forgotten about. Nine Ringed Fox was what she had titled the play. It was centered around a character who was once the prince’s enemy. She copied a person’s element to disguise and trick others. Kuki was so inspired by the episode the fox first appeared in that she just had to become just like her.

What if Kuki could borrow the idea behind Fox’s powers so she could also transform. However, she’d have to know what it even meant to copy something’s element first. In the show, Fox could literally see a person’s element and then bend hers to imitate it… Well, she’d just have to see what to make of that.

Kuki snapped out of her thoughts and hummed. She wanted to transform into a pidove, but what could she consider a pidove’s element? Pidove were flying types, that much was obvious, right? They also had wings, a beak and feathers. Could that be the clue she needed? Kuki recalled a saying that goes as ‘it takes one to know one’, so maybe she needed to be a pidove to be a pidove…

It absolutely sounded dumb, but Kuki didn’t have much else to go off on. She heaved a sigh and closed her eyes to concentrate once more, using her new line of thinking as a guide. Be a bird, become one with its element, become one with the skies itself. Kuki repeated those words to herself almost like a prayer. A few seconds passed, and then…

A gasp escaped Kuki when she felt a pressure rising from deep within her. Her heart quickened, but she couldn’t feel her arms at all when she reached to clutch her chest. Kuki opened her eyes quickly, or at least she thought she did. Even though she could clearly see what was happening to her, she couldn’t actually feel her eyes.

Kuki’s body had melted into a faint glowing shape. Just when she began to wonder what was going on, her body began rapidly shifting in form again. In a few seconds, everything settled. Kuki could feel herself again. However, it was immediately apparent that she had transformed after all. For one thing, she noticed a bizarrely wider range of vision, and she couldn’t feel her lips, but instead something tough and rigid where they should have been.

“Whoa… it worked!” Kuki chirped, ogling her feathered wing with starry eyes. Even more surprising was how natural she felt as a pidove even though it was her first time being one. There was no unease or anything offputting about the experience. Kuki immediately knew how to beat her wings and jump to fly back to the top of the drawer, and even how to fold them back into place properly. Her new set of instincts had already taken over.

“This is so cool! I can’t believe I actually did it! I can’t wait to see the look on Mew’s face when she gets back. Oh, what should I become next?” Kuki said with a little dance. “I know! I should turn into a vulpix!”

Having decided on her next form, Kuki fell into concentration again. To her surprise, the transformation process kicked off instantly. It was almost scary how quickly it happened. But who cares? Kuki had six tails! And they were all fluffy when she hugged them together in her paws.

Kuki leapt off the drawer and landed gracefully next to the notebook. She had completed the first step of her plan. The only thing left to do was to try and turn back to a human. Kuki could already turn into other pokemon now, so it shouldn’t be all that hard to become human, right? Focusing on the image of a human and becoming one with their element should be easy enough since she’d been human for the past thirteen years, not including the time she spent dormant of course.

With a huff, Kuki closed her eyes to transform again.

In a few seconds, she should be back to how she was before everything changed.

What?

Kuki's mind drew a complete blank in a way she struggled to make sense of. There was simply no reaction or even a sense of anticipation that it could work, even moreso than when she merely didn’t know what she was doing earlier.

“Wha—” Kuki muttered, opening her eyes with a frown.

… No, something wasn’t right. Maybe she needed to start off with something simple, like picturing herself when she was a human, and then work her way up from there. And so, Kuki closed her eyes and scoured her memories from the past…

Anything would've been fine. Whether it was a memory from when she was much younger, or even just a memory of one of her plays. Anything!

Kuki opened her eyes again in alarm and her body trembled uncontrollably.

What was going on? She sort of felt it before, but it was like all of her memories were shrouded in a blurred out filter. She could recall whole events, but it was as if she herself was never in any of them. Even when Kuki tried remembering her own face, nothing surfaced in her mind. It was like imagining a color that doesn’t exist.

“This is… What’s going on?” Kuki asked in a shaky voice. Her heart drummed in her chest and her throat felt dry. She could no longer maintain her vulpix form in her panic, and so her body reverted back to a mew.

Kuki stared down at her paws. Why… Why did it feel like her mind was telling her that was what she must be?

Those words Mew spoke earlier echoed in her mind, and Kuki’s heart coiled up in dread.

You’re not a human anymore.

 

[Equitial]

In the few weeks since Kuki’s new life began, Mew had taken the time to teach Kuki how to master her all-new abilities. The first thing Kuki had to learn was the various forms of telekinesis, and she came up with a good training exercise to help Kuki get the hang of it.

The first paragraphs of this chapter probably could have been left out or repurposed. They introduce the chapter, but that's not really necessary. The chapter would have been easy enough to follow if it had started directly with Kuki practicing her abilities, and it's generally better to start a chapter/scene in the midst of things happening rather than with exposition.

"I did it…” Kuki exhaled deeply. She slumped her shoulders and rubbed her forehead. “I finally did it! Oh yeah!" Kuki finished with triumphant flips in midair.

Such a cutie xD

Kuki deflated and groaned even harder. "That looong?! I'm gonna be..." she counted on her digits then gasped. "I'll be more than twenty years old by then!"

Unless Kuki has some kind of learning disorder that makes numbers difficult for her, at thirteen she should have been able to figure out basic addition even without any formal schooling. Even if she did have dyscalculia or something similar, this is a bit much.

She lickedthe berry juices off her paw

typo

The tv was sitting on the other side of the room

It normally would have been fine to leave "tv" uncapitalized, however you do capitalize it a few sentences later:

One time Mew had to take the TV away because Kuki had spent two days watching nonstop while Mew was gone for an errand that took that long.

No fair. Don't you know how hard it is to resist the binge, Mew? xD

‘You and I are both a very, very special kind of pokemon, Kuki.’ Mew paused and placed her other paw on Kuki’s cheek. Only the whirring of the ceiling fan filled the void of silence during her brief pause. ‘If you’re not careful out there in the world, something terrible could happen to you. And I may not always be able to protect you. I already failed once…’

Hmm, this bit doesn't feel foreshadowy at all. Don't know why Mew is worrying -- I'm sure everything will be fine.

I also love that sentence about the ceiling fan. That detail felt very grounding; added a lot of vividity to the scene.

“I want to eat sweets, or some chocolate. Maybe even ice cream or something! How about jello, I haven’t had that in forever… I think. Since I can’t go with you, I can have some snacks at least, right?”

By the way, I'm picking out some of these quotes as I skim through the chapter a second time. My first read-through, I liked Kuki's request because it suggested she wanted to remind herself of her days as a human. Upon the second reading, however, I finally saw the foreshadowing for this chapter's twist. I love being able to pick up subtle hints when re-reading. Nice job (y)

Her nose crinkled at the scent of ink wafting up from the page. Such a bothersome, sensitive nose. She never would’ve noticed the irritating scent in the past unless she had her face right up on the book.

I like this detail. Kuki generally focuses on the positive, so this bit stood out. It's a good way of indicating her dissatisfaction with her new body.

What if she turns into Mew? No, that’d be pretty redundant. She already was one.

lmfao

There was at least one occasion when Kuki asked Mew how her shape-shifting worked. It was a pretty mundane conversation, one which Kuki had thought very little of at the time.

‘And behold, now I’m a pidove!’ Mew declared, perching atop Kuki’s head.

Kuki clapped her hands with a gleeful smile. She reached up to grab Mew, and Mew hopped out of reach to transform into a Jigglypuff.

“Jigglypuff! Yay, are you gonna sing for me now?” Kuki asked, watching Mew bounce up and down.

‘Only when it’s bedtime,’ Mew said. She giggled and reverted back to her base form. Kuki followed Mew’s gaze while she twirled around her.

“Mew, Mew. How do you do that? Can all pokemon transform like that?” Kuki asked, because Mew was the only pokemon she’d known at the time.

‘Nope, I’m the only pokemon in the world that can become whatever she wants!’ Mew bragged with a wink.

“I wanna transform, too! Show me, please!” Kuki said, her eyes bright and starry.

Mew chuckled. ‘It’s easy Kuki. You just have to focus on an image of what you want to become, and then will yourself to become it,’ Mew explained, transforming into an eevee and flicking her tail at Kuki. ‘See? It’s not that hard!’

Kuki blinked twice and tilted her head. “I dun get it.”

‘Don’t worry about it, Kuki. I’m sure if you keep trying, one day you’ll be able to become whoever you want in your own way.’

After recalling that memory, Kuki couldn’t help but smile. How long ago had it even been?

I have issues with this portion concerning the reveal. Kuki has troubles with her memory, but this portion -- an actual memory -- reads completely typically to me. Honestly, I'm sure how you could have had Kuki recall this moment while portraying her memories have changed while also being relatively subtle about it. But nevertheless, it's jarring to read this pretty standard flashback and then have Kuki realize her memories have gone weird.

They also had wings, a beak and feathers. Could that be the clue she needed? Kuki recalled a saying that goes as ‘it takes one to know one’, so maybe she needed to be a pidove to be a pidove…

It absolutely sounded dumb, but Kuki didn’t have much else to go off on. She heaved a sigh and closed her eyes to concentrate once more, using her new line of thinking as a guide. Be a bird, become one with its element, become one with the skies itself. Kuki repeated those words to herself almost like a prayer.

I get what you're going for here -- Mew transforms by becoming a new Pokemon from the outside in, while Kuki transforms from the inside out -- but Kuki's realization and the description are both pretty vague.

A gasp escaped Kuki when she felt a pressure rising from deep within her. Her heart quickened, but she couldn’t feel her arms at all when she reached to clutch her chest. Kuki opened her eyes quickly, or at least she thought she did. Even though she could clearly see what was happening to her, she couldn’t actually feel her eyes.

Kuki’s body had melted into a faint glowing shape. Just when she began to wonder what was going on, her body began rapidly shifting in form again. In a few seconds, everything settled. Kuki could feel herself again. However, it was immediately apparent that she had transformed after all. For one thing, she noticed a bizarrely wider range of vision, and she couldn’t feel her lips, but instead something tough and rigid where they should have been.

I liked the description of her transforming, though! Especially the bits about how her new body felt as she and after she changed.

But who cares? Kuki had six tails! And they were all fluffy when she hugged them together in her paws.

xD

You’re not a human anymore.

t, this is heartbreaking :'(

I'm really impressed by this chapter. The plotting was solid and a lot was packed in there about how Kuki has adjusted to being a mew. I especially like the last half of the chapter where Kuki's at home by herself. I know you've had issues trying to portray one character by themself before, but that scene turned out great! Aside from that one memory, the build-up to the twist was well-done. And that ending. I originally reacted to this chapter with a Quag, but I'm changing it to something that better reflects my emotions upon reading that ending.

😲😢😭