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Alright, I’ve kept you waiting long enough for an update to that review exchange. Let’s give this thing a quick and dirty bump to get things rolling again:
Quite a few, apparently. Even if I do wonder if there should’ve been a bit more indication before the after-the-fact mention in the dialogue that Rick went through quite a bit of beer.
Ah yes, I can already tell that things are going to get nice and awkward in short order. Though for your readers who don’t have Spotify accounts, you’d probably find the following YT link a better alternative (I’m pretty sure it’s the same one since ‘Jonne Kokkonen’ is brought up as an alias):
Ok, it didn't occur to me to check and see if there was a youtube channel for this guy in particular. I'm going to swap the link out for this. Thanks! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KApkPLhmWng
I mostly just wanted it to make a point and move on. Especially since I added another similar dream sequence at the start of chapter 1 (I don't think you saw that one since I added it after you had reviewed, I think.)
Though I feel the prior scene ends a bit abruptly. Even something as simple as noting that the Gentleman left since he had card games to get to I think would’ve made for a better ending note.
Small missing punctuation there. Though I actually wonder if we’re going to cliffhanger on a battle here or else if the Gentleman’s just going to curbstomp Erik badly enough that he barely gets a mention in his journal.
I actually think that this would’ve been one of those battles that would’ve been worth depicting in more detail. Not necessarily because it would be particularly climactic, but more because it’d be an opportunity to show off more of how Gotan will be interacting with future encounters like this.
But I found myself my getting reminded of just how different and standout this story is as a premise, which you know what, kudos for picking the lane less traveled and owning it.
I feel the main standout strength of this chapter was the character focus on the Gentlemen, since it helped get more insight into the Gentleman and his backstory.
I’m not fully convinced that he’ll be around for the long term, but he’s been fun to watch so far, and I’m glad he’ll be back for more chapters in this story after this.
As I mentioned earlier in the review, Rick is around to stay for the Book! Rick is probably one of the best aspects of Book One which is crazy since I tossed him in on a whim!
Once again, the multimedia component added a lot to the reading experience, especially the custom art which helped a lot for visualizing the characters. You really pulled out all the stops for this chapter.
And onto the less fun and more critical parts of this chapter. I’m not really sure how much you intend to further overhaul your chapters that you already published up to this point, but in this chapter, it felt like there were some parts of the prose that were a bit too hazy and high level, and like they’d have benefitted from getting into things in more detail. I also felt like there was room to get a lot deeper into the Gentleman’s thought process, especially since this is a more character-focused chapter and his journal is his space to bare his soul, while we spent a weird amount of time from the outside looking in, especially at moments that could’ve been particularly impactful as the Gentleman grapples with how he inadvertently wound up pushing Nikki away when she genuinely loved him. Lastly, I feel like the first card battle with Gotan riding shotgun should’ve been shown off a bit more. I get that this story generally fast-forwards through the card battles where it’s another “day ending in ‘y’” for the Gentleman, but it did feel a bit weird that we didn’t even get an acknowledgement of what standout cards Erik had in his deck and spent more time focusing on how Gotan took damage from the card battles. For that matter, Gotan is weirdly absent in a way that you’d think wouldn’t be the case where the Gentleman literally just needs to look out his window to see him, which just felt a little strange to me since it was a missed opportunity to get in a bit more humor.
For the moment, I'm satisfied with the general beats and writing for Book One with the exception of improving the dialogue which I am currently working through. Going to be implementing hovertext more too.
I may eventually return to improve things further, but I'm also wanting to get to work on Book Two. At the very least, I think the overall quality of the book is satisfactory even though it took my best efforts just to get it to the point it is currently at.
and while I still saw areas that I felt would benefit from further polish, things largely accomplished what you set out to in this chapter, and it does a good job at getting us invested in what comes next.
I'm very happy to hear that the overall impact of this chapter was a positive one. The next chapter is probably the weakest and is also one of the shortest chapters in the fic. But even that chapter is way better than my v1 writing. Also, based on feedback form other reviewers, the book gets better as it goes! If you like the first half, I think you like the 2nd half even more!
Hiya! How are ya? Hope you're doing well because I'm finally here for the review I was talking. Apologies if it was later than I promised. Things got a bit busy during CNY so... yeah.
Anywho, let's start off with the introduction stuff:
There's definitely a ton of nice and juicy info for the game the fic is based on. I'll be honest, I thought book two was originally the 1st game's story instead of the sequel but I guess it made sense that it wasn't since it did sorta start off as a 'Mark is already the champion' thing.
I will say one thing. I am TIRED of reviewers not knowing Mark's name. I know that sounds crazy because it's literally a bed of my own making, but MAN am I glad to just be able to see and use his name in some review replies! 🤣
Also the map for the two islands is pretty cool. Tbh, I thought GR Island would look more like the 1st island because I think I remember there being a lot more forest scenes in book two so it's kinda odd seeing a big percentage of GR Island being this weird brown (Wasteland? Autumn? Mountainey?) place.
The art's pretty cool, especially the pixel art. Tango looks cute and goofy in 'em and Mark has that jazzy, fancy look and I really like how the background on his pixel art is the TCG type symbols.
The soundtracks are as cool as usual. Won't be talking about them much though unfortunately since again don't have a PC to properly listen to them but it's cool to see you putting in a lot of thought into the songs. I tried doing something similar when I was first starting out but it was a lot of effort so good on ya for sticking to it!
Fair, but thanks for commenting on it anyway! But you know, for intense moments, maybe you can listen with headphones on your phone and then go back and read the scene the track corresponds to? Just a suggestion. Some of them are really neat, especially during the important moments of the fic!
And I think that's about it for the introduction. It's definitely a lot more dense compared to other stories that do introductions but I think you put in a good amount of content and context for what game you're basing the fic on and there wasn't a single part where it felt like it was too much. So overall, I think you did a great job pretty summarising the fic's content and it sets some nice expectations for what's about to come.
Diary stuff. Mark tells us all that's happened. From his new title as the champion to tutoring then becoming broke and selling his deck and then using all commons because people are scared of fighting his full strength.
Chp 1 Summary:
Mark wakes up from his dreams and goes to the Grass club to beat a bunch of kids and then the entire island with his common deck.
Mark goes to the Water club and has to fend off all the succubus inhabiting that land and also Joshua. Then he encounters a wild Imakuni and gets a new pet!
Mark tries getting rid of bird but bird no wanna so he reluctantly lets it stay as he also thinks it'll make more people wanna fight him because of the silly birdy. We also get introduced to Nikki's brother, a scientist and learn a bit of the lore of the world along with the Ho-Oh thing.
Drunk moments ensue and Mark confesses his regrets for the love he lost and almost gets frisky with the little bro because drunk. He beats up a random scientist before going home.
Another lovely in-depth battle as Mark stomps his way through the science club and for whatever reason, Gotan hates the scientist bro that's gonna tag along.
I mean, technically he already was one... sort of. The teleporter. Even though Bill's nephew, Timmy, makes what should be reliable perfectly unreliable.
Mark finally wins against Jonathan through the power of money and bribery! He banters some more with Stephanie and we get to see some news and worldbuilding!
Mark goes to the psychic club and has a heart-to-heart with Stephanie before getting everyone else to forfeit against him by doing nothing. Truly the best Luigi player.
Mark goes to the lightning club (I wonder if the OG version was electric like the card?), and beats up the former champion with his sick after deck of commons! Also we learn some tidbits of Isaac.
No, actually the former champ visits his house. He WAS going to go to the Lightning Club that day, but ended up spending the day at home dueling Ronald and working on the blueprints for MothZapper to use in Book Two way later.
This is one of the things I love hearing most!! So many other authors have no clue what I started with or how far I've come. For someone who has seen what was to comment on what is, that is pretty special!
Like the characters (even if there's only two so far) are fun and they don't feel like they just have one trait, they actually feel alive in a sense. The dialogue's good, the humour has definitely improved too, I love all the meta jokes sprinkled about. The story flows pretty well and all the exposition blends into the narrative seamlessly and is super interesting since it also kinda tells us Mark's backstory a tinsy bit.
Aside from that though I don't think I have too much to talk about since a lot of this is just exposition I already know about. There are definitely some weak parts though, the section for the explanation on game mechanics is definitely a sharp drop in quality compared to the rest of the chapter but I know it's not supposed to be as good due to it just being explanation upon explanation so I don't think it's too important.
There was also the latter half of the Doduo exposition that felt a little off. I think it's around the part where Mark started talking about buildings being built with Doduo in mind. It's a little weird for him to randomly talk about it I guess. I think it's fine if you skip this bit honestly and just show it subtly in the background instead. Like have Mark just thinking about it when visiting somewhere that has the Doduo stuff or something like that 'cause it just felt out of place compared to everything else since it's not that surprising or weird.
Okay, so Chp 1. The dream sequence was pretty cool and it's certainly well written with the subtle hints of things not being entirely true, what with the fuzziness and all that. It's a good way to show the readers that it's a dream and not something that's actually true.
I kinda find it funny just how much Mark regrets his past. It's a nice way to sprinkle bits of his past here and there and I love how it still affects how he acts to this day. Although I'll be honest, it did get kinda annoying after the third time of him just hammering in that point. You saved it when the three grass girls were introduced and showed exactly how it affects him and his interactions.
And honestly, I'm not sure if it's just my tastes or if it's something that's a problem. I just think that him talking about the same regret like more than three times in a couple hundred words got a bit tiring. (Btw to be more specific, I'm talking about his walk to the grass club here)
I added some of that recently as something I wasn't too sure about. Ultimately I don't think it did the overall tone any favors so I trimmed some of those regret thoughts out. Thanks for bringing this up.
The rest of the chapter was fun. The first duel is also something that was engaging. It's what I'd initially expected when I picked up book 2 like a year ago.
There's the nice setup, fun dialogue between the duellers, a bit of explaining for the cards and overall, was a great introduction to how duels work.
As for the plot of him challenging the rest and the ever looming Nikki and Isaac encounters, I look forward to how all that'll go and whether he'll mend that discarded friendship or just chuck it into oblivion when they reconnect.
I loved this chapter the most so far. Mostly because it was hilarious. All the back-and-forth between the girls and Mark. I initially expected to hate or dislike them honestly but they were funny and that's a thumbs up in my book. Also poor little Joshua, hopefully he manages to escape the three dreaded succubi though it's highly likely that he wouldn't.
Yeesssss!! You have no idea how much fun this chapter was for me to write. It really stretches the boundaries. Surprisingly, I see a lot of readers having mixed opinions on it. Like they like it, but just barely. Seeing someone who gets the humor is always a treat.
I also really like how fun and engaging the specific mechanics and the switch up in tactics used compared to the last when he used Voltorb instead of Rapidash.
But that works for such a weird character like him. I like it for how goofy this random guy is, plus we also get introduced to a new reoccurring character, You Tango... or maybe just a random Doduo idk. If this is the same Doduo as Book 2 then it's cool that I get to see him this early. Excited to see how things will fare with him this early in the story.
Just another way of torturing myself. 😅 You have no idea how painful it was writing his name as Gotan and having to call him Gotan. I finally caved and couldn't take it anymore so his name gets revealed early in "Chapter 17 - Tango". Just his name, though.
I'd have to put WAY too many reactions in for that. Thankfully I'm not nearly as masochistic as Tango in the fic is and just made him pretend not to be annoyed by it the vast majority of the time.
Also since I'm one of the few that read Book 2, I do wanna say that I really like Gotan (calling him that for now 'cause it'll be really confusing for me due to you also sharing that name). The big contrast from how he used to be is probably the best change in character traits. Despite him only just appearing recently, Gotan's really endearing and likeable, and I do like the way you've eased us into the masochistic side of the dumb birds and introducing it in a comedic way unlike how it was mostly used as a detriment to Mark in the OG story. So yeah, liking Gotan a lot atm.
Nikki's brother and Da Lore! It's a good way to show off how wonky and weird the world is with ancient tech being more advanced than the modern world. I don't think I can comment on it too much though since I'm pretty aware of the sequel and a decent chunk of its lore,
Although the prose of this chapter is a tad weaker than the previous, some sentences and tags were repetitive. Oddly enough, I think it's only a problem during the drunk scenes since the scenes right after were pretty alright.
Huh. And here I thought the drunk scenes were the highlight of it. Odd that you consider it the other way around. Maybe because the repetition was intentional? They are drunk and aren't thinking very clearly.
Maybe try adding more description of things and add the drunken slurring in the narrative to put in more spice? 'cause at the moment, it feels pretty barren.
Goodness. It felt the opposite of barren to me. I thought it was very amusing. Certainly the harshest critique I've encountered of the drunk scene so far.
I don't want to write the words slurring. It sounds too annoying to do and I don't want to learn how to do that for just one scene. As for description of things... Most people liked the drunk scene, so I'm not going to worry about it. But I still appreciate the input, regardless. I'll keep it in mind if I get similar feedback from others.
That aside, I do wonder why Nikki's brother wants Doduo's feathers. Is it because Pokémon magic and it's like a source of power or something? It can't just be for nothing. Why would you make a device that only sucks that specific item otherwise?
He seeks scientific evidence that the three legendary mon exist. If they do exist, they are the only other Pokemon in their world. Currently the only Pokemon they have to work with is Doduo. By examining Doduo feathers, Rick hopes to create something like a long-range itemfinder except it finds Pokemon instead of items. Once he gets enough examples of feathers in various conditions, he plans to attune that Pokefinder to seek all pokemon EXCLUDING Doduo. He gathered burned feather variants as a way of studying flame effects on feathers. He believes this will help him fine-tune his Pokefinder to specifically locate Ho-Oh. He hopes that by finding Ho-Oh, he will also re-discover The Legendary Rainbow Palace which is said to contain the temple of Ho-Oh. That place is said to be a scientific marvel that he hopes to study.
Those are Rick's goals, anyway. Beyond the goals themselves, that's all I can say on it for now.
And Mark comes in swinging with a steel chair and boom! The science club goes down!
Jokes aside, I really do enjoy the occasional in-depth battles that happen. It's nice seeing just how different in skill level Mark is compared to the random NPCs. And not to mention just how much better written they are compared to before, they're super engaging and fun to read through like I'm actually watching two dudes just duelling each other with a bunch of cards.
Anywho, after beating the scientists, he heads out with Rick (finally remembered his name this time) in town. I like the two's chemistry, Rick's been a blast to read through and having him be some sort of conflict with Gotan is nice. I wonder whether Gotan will start being a bit more prickly now that he'll have to spend more time with Rick.
Alright so review time! Mark challenges the Fire Club, apparently he's an OG member. And unsurprisingly, he loses his first battle against a member of a club that spawned his super talented skills.
So as an aside, I do like that Mark actually loses here, even if it's because his luck went kapoot, it's nice to see him not just casually blitz everyone before him and it makes him feel less like a juiced up power fantasy MC and and more like a grounded character that's just really good at the game. And also, it teaches us the one true enemy of TCG, RNGesus.
Funny thing is that all the duels in Book One are based on the outcomes of the duels from the original prologue from the original version of the fic! So, I'm not actually crafting losses for him at specific points. It was just how the lets-play went that I crafted the narrative around!
Anywho, aside from that, I do enjoy the different flair of character personalities we've been getting throughout the chapters and it's nice to see some scenes dedicated to them individually. It's a huge upgrade compared to how it started when most characters were usually just one to five paragraphs or so of just really surface-level traits. It makes the world feel a lot more alive with all the different unique personalities running around.
Ah... Most people have no idea how flat my characters used to be. You being able to tell how much better they are AND comment on it is a pure joy to read!
Like I really do enjoy John's arrogance annoying the crap out of Mark. And while I do have one tiny complaint about the chapter, it isn't big enough to warrant changing I think as it's just my personal opinion. Basically John and Jonathan are very similar in names and I did get a little confused when I was first introduced to them. Again, I don't think it matters too much since I don't think we'll be seeing them anytime soon in the future but it's something to keep in mind when making characters as to not make their names too close to one another (unless y'know, they're twins or that's the point of the joke).
I find it so funnily weird how paying money can influence a coin flip. Like, I know it's explained already but it's such a goofy concept. Like imagine paying a couple bucks just to manipulate luck? All the billionaires would be swimming in even more dough if they could.
I had to come up with SOME way for the bribery and Bill's Teleporter malfunction to make sense. You KNOW what my ending of Book Two will involve and YES I am going to keep that chain of events!
Also kinda funny that a future seer is using her powers to work customer service instead of like the lottery or trying to gamble. Though I guess Stephanie was stated to be a kid so she's probably not old enough to even try that.
Going back to the main topic of the chapter, Jonathan. I know I've said it before in the previous chapter but it really is nice to see Mark losing and trying his best to boost his odds... even if it's a morally dubious way to gain an advantage. It makes his championhood feel a lot more earned and more believable as he's not stomping his way through while holding back. It also makes the inevitable wins so much more gratifying when it happens, y'know.
That's the narrative advantage of him using an all-common card deck. If he was using his original champion deck, Mystic Fire? He would wipe the floor with every single one of these sorry excuses for duelists.
So a decent bunch happens this chapter with Mark beating up a little boy and reading the news. It's nice seeing the little set-ups and foreshadowing hidden in the news section, really helps the payoff when things start ramping up later on.
It's a bit odd that I find the female characters in this fic a lot more entertaining than the male ones. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing or anything since Rick is a fun character as well though I guess it's also because a lot more girl were introduced than guys lately so that might be colouring my thoughts a bit.
Okay, so let me just jump straight into the big thing about this chapter. Stephanie!
The heart-to-heart with her and Mark was cute, definitely felt a little sad at hearing her backstory and it was a scene that was good and didn't drag things down.
Though I can't help but wonder whether it would've hit a lot harder if we knew what exactly Stephanie wanted to use her money for. I know she already said it's to numb the pain but I feel like it could hit a lot harder if we get subtle hints of what exactly she's doing with the money, y'know?
There is a reason I'm not saying in the fic, but would you like to know? If so, click below...
Her father was a professional hacker. Her mother was a reporter. Her mother was investigating the disappearance of Doduo from TCG Island. He leads eventually pointed to Neo Island. Specifically the Doduo research facility. Her father hacked into the facility and found incomplete files hinting at something big and ominous.
Later her parents receive an anonymous tip from a whistle-blower on Neo Island. They are to travel to Neo Island to meet the whistle-blower to get full copies of the files that Stephanies dad hacked to get the incomplete ones for. They left Stephanie to go to Neo Island. Stephanie didn't realize the danger they would be in because her psychic powers prevented her from seeing anything about Neo Island.
Her parents left and didn't return. Stephanie used her psychic powers to see that her parents would never return even though she still couldn't see anything about Neo Island with her powers.
She had learned the basics of hacking from her father. She taught herself more with the notes her father had left behind.
Using a combination of hacking and psychic powers, she was able to access information on Neo Island and learned her parents had been killed in a staged accident. She follows the information trail all the way to the top for the one responsible. The CEO of Eyetech Inc. who doubles as the ruler of Neo Island: Mister Eye. Knowing who killed her parents, Stephanie has a singular goal in mind. Using her psychic power she learns of a way to get what she wants but she needs money. Lots and lots of money. So she uses her powers to find the quickest ways she can without being stopped. And she has no problems playing dirty to get it...
I won't answer anything else right now for Stephanie, but ask me again after you read "Chapter 20 - Light and Shadow" and I'll give you part two of her tale.
Something that she'd always bugged them about when they were still around? Maybe she wants to use it to help her club? Or any number of things really. I think giving us something could make it feel a lot more personal.
So aside from that, I do like the short bits of bonding between Gotan and Rick, it's cute seeing them (or well Gotan) not hating or disliking one another. And the rest of the psychic members immediately forfeiting is a nice casual display of their powers. A bit disappointing that the psychic club scene was so short but it makes sense given the context of their powers.
Yeah, I was getting tired of having to write all these in-depth things, so having ONE club where things could just be easy for that was a nice break for myself and change of pace for the readers.
So here we learned that apparently Isaac was the reason why nobody wanted to fight Mark with his op deck which sets up a nice little build-up to the inevitable confrontation that'll occur in the future.
I wonder why exactly Isaac decided to do that. I assume it's likely jealousy because of Mark's skills so I'm all the more excited to see how that confrontation will go down. I'm expecting a lot of screaming and yelling.
Anywho, another duel and this time with the former champion. It's always cool to see other people react to just how vast the gap between the skill levels of a player and an NPC is.
It's also pretty nice to see Mark starting to work on another deck, makes MothZapper feel a lot more 'worked on' rather than coming out of nowhere (yes, I remember he did so because he lost. I'm moreso talking about how it's because it took him so long to make a new deck) in Book 2.
Yeah, I had to get the origin for MothZapper in there somewhere. Seemed like a great opportunity to do so. Also, I think I mentioned Ronald helped him build it in my original fic, so now you get to see how it started!
Knowing what I do about the diary. It's kinda funny how the foreshadowing here is essentially implying that this book is super old and yet somehow it's not broken or ruined. Great subtle way to hint at the 'magicks' of the book
Yeah, and if you read the authors note at the bottom, it even talks about how it was used to save the game in the game itself. (oh man I don't know how many people will miss that. Probably all of them )
Like isn't it a good thing that the expert is passing down his knowledge and brightening the next generation or something? Though I guess if no pro teaches the younger generation about the TCG, it does make sense on why so many people are complete trash at the game despite it being the main way to solve conflict.
Christ, just how expensive is this world's college? Like I understand the economy's shit but selling a literal mansion to afford university seems real silly, like damn I think this really sets the idea for why so many of the population is trash at the TCG if college is so expensive a rich person has to sell his fucking mansion to afford it!
Remember how I said teaching is garbage? It works for all aspects of their world except the TCG. Many people grow in skill, but they only get so far before they stop improving. It's different for Mark. Same for Mint. But because of this, people are willing to pay INSANE amounts of money to supposedly rise to the top. This drove the cost up to crazy heights, ESPECIALLY for the foremost univeristy in the world for the TCG.
Yes. She absolutely will. In fact, she will be the final opponent of Book Four. Also, if you didn't catch the most recent update, check out the prologue again. I have art for her in there now!
You're right! He DID invent a war-crime! Billy is secretly a monster. (though in my fic, it's like there is a 50% chance of that being true or something )
Okay so I know this section is mostly an exposition rather than anything pertaining to the actual story. I do think it's kinda odd that Mark would talk about poison type if they don't exist. If you ever decide to mix this section in with the story or make this more story like, I think it'd be better if you have Billy question why something that's literally living sludge is grass type and having Mark just saying he doesn't know or saying that it's a commentary of modern society something along the lines.
Again, it's something completely optional since this is just an exposition section but I think you could add some humour if you have them question why something that looks toxic is grass type
I honestly can't understand how something like that ever happened to begin with... It's really horrible. Like it's a joke in the chapter, but its so oppressive in reality. You can never own anything of substantial value as long as there is a tax on it.
Okay, what's the monstrosity? I'm kinda curious. Is it a really big Doduo plushie or... No wait, is it a Scyther shrine? I remember him loving Scyther. Also misspelled 'coming'
Y'know, I always find it funny that in Pokémon worlds where pokéballs don't exist, there's always just a pokéball symbol for like no reason. Like why would something like that exist in PMD or in this fic where cards are the main way to fight? Not a criticism mind you, it's just something I wanna just rant about lol
Huh, the TCG has levels? Do they actually do anything or are they just pure cosmetic? I'm assuming higher levels=better stats based on Mark's thoughts.
This just in newly-appointed champion bullies a little girl to tears. More news at 8.
Also there's something hilarious about seeing him smirking like that right after the picture of Brittany crying
Probably not important, but one of the only lakes? Huh? I know the world is tiny and all but seriously? What? Do rivers exist? Are the lakes super special or is it just random worldbuilding because the world is smol?
His thoughts out loud would be pretty funny. Maybe I should make a chapter about it where he contracts a psychic virus that broadcasts his thoughts or something?
Wait what, he just completely ignored the girls and left the water club? Aw, I kinda wanna see what the girls' reactions were to that random Imakuni encounter.
Also yay! Tango (who's totally not secretly an ex-evil guy) is here! Also whatever happened to the Amy duel? I assumed things went the same but it's kinda odd that she got left out
Really? It's not bothering anyone! Why on earth would you care for something as stupid as that? (Also yes, I know this is a joke about IRL, I'm still annoyed at that even being a thing)
Lol, I can already see the running gag of Tango trying really hard to correct his name and the climax where he finally reveals himself and screams that his name is Tango
I think the added line breaks here are kinda redundant tbh. This section could either just be mixed in with the previous scene or removed entirely since it doesn't really add too much considering how small it is.
Y'know, with how many times Gotan's let it slip that he's not an ordinary Doduo. I wonder when Mark will start suspecting Gotan of being something more 'cause having this many coincidences happening so close to each other would probably make even the most skeptical person to think that something's off.
Just the mental image of that is hilarious. The thought of some guy fighting through hundreds of people in a card game just to get to the CEO, with said CEO escaping through blimp is so ridiculous.
I wonder how her reaction would be if she was ever a variable against Cypress with the diary? Y'know, considering all the time loops that'd happened during the fight, would her vision be all wonky and stuff when it happened?
Oh I just realised something. Since book 3 is gonna be a tournament, does that mean we'll get to see these club guys again? 'cause that'll be cool if so!
Book 3 will be an origin story for Tango and his original owner, Kara of the GR Fire Fortress, and an arc for a certain other character.
But for Book 4? As many duelists from TCG Island and GR Island are brought to The Legendary Rainbow Palace for the biggest tournament their world has ever seen.
I don't remember if I asked this before but huh. Psychics can see the future but not use telekinesis? Can they atleast teleport? Because that's so odd since telekinesis is usually the easy baby steps for any other psychic
Could be worse. At least it isn't the mainline games where your Pokémon can stay frozen for potentially an infinite amount of turns if you were unlucky
I feel like adding a bit more to what Gotan is doing would be better since the sentence 'staring holes in someone' doesn't make me think of puppy-dog eyes like what Gotan is currently doing
You're right! He DID invent a war-crime! Billy is secretly a monster. (though in my fic, it's like there is a 50% chance of that being true or something