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Pokémon Places We Call Home

Negrek

The One Star
Staff
Didn’t realize you’d posted this. Glad to see it up! I think this makes for a fun glimpse into Nip’s pre-story life. It feels like a sequence with a lot of little tidbits that might become important later. There’s the ominous little mention of Umbra, for example. I wonder if we’ll end up hearing more about Holly in the future, or if the Celebi legend Nip didn’t know might end up being relevant…

It’s of course heartbreaking to see Nip’s determination to become a hunter here, knowing what it’s going to mean for him down the line. Dat hope for the future in the final line, damn. The dramatic irony here is great; this extra reads very differently depending on how familiar with the main fic, and I’m wondering if returning to read it later on in the fic might reveal new dimensions of it, to.

Once again, nice work, and thanks for writing this for me!
 

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
@Spiteful Murkrow
17
Wait, so does Haru's family just chip away little by little at a surrounding forest? Or do they practice managed forestry and thin certain parts out, then come back to them in like a decade?
More the latter. Theres likely *areas* that they clear out for other uses, but generally they try to keep things managed and sustainable.
Is that influence from Power Trip showing there? Or just a roughhousing thing that you dropped in?
If it is influenced, it's subconscious. Generally I was just trying to come up with ways they might interact that don't feel totally human.
The 'Lazy Meowstic', huh? What's the story behind that one? Since I'm not sure whether that was drawn out of a hat or if it's a reference to something
Just came up with something that felt like a fantasy tavern name, but Pokemon. (I don't know how much his wife appreciates it tho 8P)
Not that that isn't extremely on-brand for Theran Village as depicted up to this point in the story, but exactly none of that sounds healthy there.
I imagine it isn't easy being the only religious leader in town that everyone is turning to after seeing an underwhelming god.
I mean, based off of when Muse's premonitions kicked in last time, I'm pretty sure that the 'disaster' has to personally affect them in order for them to perceive it.

... Or else Muse just can't pick up on them reliably. That could work, too
There's some truth to the latter part. Muse never got properly trained, as we later find out.

18
Oh, so that's how premonitions work with Absol, huh? I'll admit, I'd be pretty motivated to tell others about danger inbound if it felt like part of my body was on fire after a vision.
Speaking of references, this one actually *is* influenced by another fic - The Desert Cat’s Instruments of Creation.
Wonder if Whisper's referring to treatment of Shimmer in particular or something more general.
Shimmer, primarily.

19
Oh, it's like those water tanks/coolers that you can buy from grocery stores. For a second, I was going to ask how common plumbing was in this setting since I at first read that as a sink faucet.
Yep, that’s exactly what I had in mind. As for plumbing, there’s none in the village. You might find it in bigger settlements to a limited degree, though.
Wait a minute, are those four a reference to something? Or just rolled wholecloth for this story?
Stick around and find out 8P
... I'm pretty sure that this was an absolutely terrible idea given that the text repeatedly said that these four seemed shady, but okay there, Haru.
Listen. SHe may be stupid.
For a second, I thought that was a subtle HoC nod, but nah. That one was Rawst Leaves. Though from a spot check, it looks like the creator had a similar intention in mind given that Occa is the fire-resistance berry.
It *was* loosely inspired by HoC, actually. I just took a different route.


@love
Thanks for the review, as always! I’ll be revisiting the suggestions when I get around to the edits in a few months. Regarding Nip, my thought process by having him speak up is that he felt she might leave him alone if he said something. I look forward to seeing your thoughts in the coming chapters!

@Virgil134
This part felt pretty jarring to me, since an entire conversation just got condensed into a few description paragraphs. I understand not wanting to have Muse repeat stuff, but I think having Muse bring things up in a different way, or perhaps a shorter version of the story, would have been better. Show, don’t tell after all. It’s not interesting to read a few paragraphs that say a group of characters talked about something. Showing them actually doing so, is.
I can understand where you’re coming from. I’ve had repeated reviews over the last few chapters complaining about things being rehashed. I didn’t feel there was much point in rehashing the conversation when the most notable reaction is Haru’s, so I cut it. It’s possible I overcorrected, though, so I’ll keep an eye out to see if future reviews bring up the same issue.
Huh, I figured Haru was younger than that.
A recurring issue XD. Here’s the thing. She’s *barely* old enough.

Glad you enjoyed the bonus chapter.

@Negrek
Thanks for the comment! Don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll see more of Nip’s past at some point.

Additionally, special thanks to HelloYellow17 and Kyeugh for the smeargle swap art!
 
21: Susana

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
A/N: Special thanks to my beta readers, SparklingEspeon, ShadowVulpi, and deerestove. Be sure to check out their works! Additonally, a big thank you to Adam for the special chapter header. I hope to go back and add chapter art to earlier chapters at some point. See the twitter post here.

A couple of bonus chapters have been added to the oneshot compilation, Stories They Couldn't Tell. If you enjoy this work, consider giving the bonus chapters a look



Susana

chapter header.jpg


"Finding the gods?" Haru stood stiff, staring, flabbergasted at the strange zoroark in front of her. Her mouth hung open as she tried to process Susana's claim. "You… you're…"

"A zoroark, yes," Susana interrupted with a chuckle. "Once again, sorry for deceiving you. My appearance is rather frightening, isn't it?" She raised a forepaw to rub at her wild, disheveled mane. "Our job requires some degree of secrecy so I usually keep my true form hidden. Not everyone is as friendly as you, Haru."

She began to approach, and Haru took stumbling steps backwards on instinct. Susana's posture was nonthreatening, but the prey part of Haru's mind didn't like the idea of a large, strange pokemon approaching her. Especially when there was no escape route. But she forced herself to stop and held her ground. "I-I… I'm not as friendly as you think. Come any closer and you'll see how much damage these teeth can do."

The zoroark didn't seem swayed by Haru's trembling threat, but she did stop, chuffing as if she'd heard a joke.

"Goodness, I'm sorry if I've come across as threatening, Haru. Look, maybe I can make it up to you, make it clear we mean no harm. Are you hungry? Thirsty? We have carrots and bread in the way of herbivore food. We also have razzberry juice and wine."

Haru still felt an edge of hunger. But her stomach was too twisted to even think about eating right now. "I'm fine."

Susana dropped her paws to her sides and shrugged. "Suit yourself. But really, please make yourself comfortable. You can stay right there if it makes you feel safer. Just let me come by so I can unlock the small door for you. That way you can leave at any time." She took a step forward. "As you can see, none of us need it, so there was no need to unlock it."

"I'll… let me do it myself," Haru said, backing away until her rump bumped against the door. If she let Susana do it, there was a chance that she would use her illusions to make it look like she was unlocking it. If Susana was talented enough, she could still trick Haru into thinking the door was unlocked anyway. But that was less likely. And even so, doing it herself made her feel safer.

No one stopped her from unlocking the door, assuaging her fears somewhat. She turned back and crouched so that she was more comfortable, but still able to turn and flee at a moment's notice.

Susana returned to her spot by the map and took a seat, brushing her claws through her mane. "Now that that's settled, where should I start…"

"Maybe at the beginning," Haru said bluntly. "Who are you, really?"

"Oh, everything I've said so far is true." Susana stopped brushing her mane and tilted her head at Haru, ears flicking up. "We're explorers from the Expedition Society, on a mission to find out more information about both mystery dungeons and the gods. The only thing I lied about is my identity." She paused. "Well, I know we only told a partial truth before inviting you here, but there's a reason for that!"

Haru considered for a moment. "So why are you so secretive about it? I'm sure a lot of pokemon would be excited to go chasing legendaries."

"Isn't it obvious?" the raichu, Topaz, said. "Think about it. Most pokemon fear the discovery of their gods. They might say they want to find them, but they're lying to themselves. What if the gods don't live up to their expectations? What if the stories are lies? What if they don't exist at all?"

Skorch, the charizard, spoke next. "There's hundreds of stories about various gods, but we have very little hard evidence. The theory that Dialga and Palkia formed the dungeons during the historic War of the Ancients is well accepted, but even that isn't completely proven. But no one questions it, because few pokemon are ready to face the possibility that the gods aren't real. Or that, if they are, they don't really care."

Haru snorted, thinking both of her earlier conversation with Nip and the way everyone had been acting since Celebi's appearance. "You got that right."

Topaz, who had splayed out on his belly and begun tracing shapes in the floor with his tail tip, cast a glance at Remer before discerningly looking at Haru. "The way you said that makes me feel like there's something you aren't telling us."

Haru's gaze darted to the side as she tried to find a way to salvage her comment. As much as she wanted to expose Celebi for the fraud he was, something held her back. That information was for her village and her village alone. "All I mean is that there's some pokemon out there that freak out when their faith is challenged. That's all."

Topaz exchanged another look with Remer. Haru's heart pounded, threatening to burst through her chest as the silence drew on. It was Skorch that finally spoke.

"Makes enough sense, don't you guys think?"

Susana bobbed her head. "Agreed." Then she turned back to Haru. "Well, now you know why we're trying to get to the shrine. But, as you saw back in front of the temple, we haven't had much luck getting anyone to take us." She sighed, slowly slinking back to her map. She traced a line across it with one claw before looking up again.

"You said you've been there before." Her tone was leading. "Is there… any chance you could take us? Maybe even a bit further up the mountain, if time permits? I know it's a big ask, but you'd be doing us a big service. And we'd be happy to pay you for your time."

"E-excuse me?" Haru's mouth hung open as she tried to process the request. They wanted her to take them to the shrine. No, not just to the shrine, but up the mountain. They couldn't be serious.

Susana tilted her head, her ears flicking back and forth. "Goodness, what's the matter?"

It took several moments before she finally found her words. "Do… Do you realize how dangerous it is to go up there? No one goes up there anymore." Well, that wasn't totally true. Anu went up there every few cycles with a couple other guards, and there were probably wildeners that visited the shrine to pay respects, since most weren't comfortable entering the village to visit the temple itself; she couldn't remember the last time any had shown up for any of the religious festivals. But she wasn't about to say that out loud.

"You're likely to encounter territorial wildeners along the way," she continued, stamping a paw. "And don't get me started about the dangers beyond the shrine. My understanding is there's no real path up the mountain past the shrine. And you have to deal with chilling winds, large crevices, and — if you get high enough — snow and freezing temperatures. Pokemon have died trying to scale it." Her mind drifted to falling snow. A younger Muse's wails rang in her ears. Then she shook her body and forced the thoughts away.

Remer exchanged a look with Skorch before saying, "I understand your hesitations, young one. But you would be in good paws. We are well experienced with exploring dangerous locations."

"If she's never been past the shrine, then she wouldn't be able to guide us any further, would she?" Skorch interjected, addressing the girafarig. "I don't see the use in asking that of her."

Through the discussion, Susana remained quiet, her eyes closed.

Haru turned away and took a step towards the door. "Sorry, but my answer is no. I sympathize with your cause. Really, I do. But I can't justify risking my life for it."

Susana sighed. "I understand. Thank you for your time, Haru." Then she turned back to her team. "Come on, we best hit the streets again. I'm sure we can find someone in this village willing to take us."

Haru paused, about to unlatch the small door. "…I thought you were talking about looking outside the village for help before."

"Well, we're considering it," Susana admitted. "If we can't find anyone willing to help here, then we'll have to head out. But we'd prefer to work with civilized 'mon. You know how difficult it can be to work with wildeners, pokemon still beholden to their instincts, right?"

Haru lowered her paw and turned around, thoughts racing through her head as she made mental connections. All the while that dull headache from before persisted. If these explorers went asking around the village, they were bound to come across Toshi sooner or later. And he wouldn't hesitate to answer an exploration team's request.

Her mind drifted to mental images of her dying grandfather, a pokemon who made it far into the mountains, only for his traveling companions to die. A pokemon who made it back home, only to succumb to his injuries shortly after. Suddenly it wasn't her grandfather lying in front of her, struggling for breath as he told the adults of his team's demise until his body gave out, and he was silenced forever. Now it was Toshi. Bleeding and small, his eyes glassy and staring at nothing.

She couldn't let that happen.

Heart racing, she took her paw away from the handle and turned back to Susana. "Fine. Fine. You make a good point. I'll help." Susana opened her mouth to say something, but Haru cut her off with a raised paw. "But only as far as the old shrine. And only under the condition that, if you do decide to go further, you escort me back to the village first. After that, you're on your own."

"That wouldn't be a problem." Susana brought her paws up and tapped her claws together, eyes closed in a friendly squint. "How soon could you go? Is tomorrow good? We've already stocked up on supplies — except food, but we can take care of that tonight."

Tomorrow? Haru tilted her head. "Why so soon?"

Remer answered as he climbed to his feet and approached the storage chest. "We have other leads we want to follow up on afterwards, but we have to return to our branch and report our findings soon."

That's a reasonable explanation, Haru thought. She stared at him a moment longer before letting out a breath. "Alright. You have yourselves a deal."

Susana clapped twice and showed her teeth in what Haru thought was supposed to be a friendly expression. "Excellent! Where can we meet you tomorrow?"

Haru looked to the ceiling, considering. There were a few places she could think of, but some would raise questionsl. "I think the best place is… There's a bridge crossing the river, not far outside of the village. The path to the shrine branches off of the road on the other side. That would be a good place to start."

Susana bobbed her head. "Cool. We'll meet you there just after sunrise so we can get a bright and early start. Anu said it's almost a day's journey away, and we'd like to get you back home in a reasonable amount of time." She held a paw out towards Haru, paw pad facing up.

Haru stared at the paw. Susana had made this same strange gesture before. When the zoroark didn't move, she tilted her head. "What are you doing?"

Susana looked at Haru, then at her paw. "O-oh, I guess this fad hasn't reached you guys out in the boonies yet. It's called 'shaking paws.' It's kind of like… a physical promise for a verbal agreement."

"An agreement…" How strange. Still, she sat back and reached up to place her paw in the zoroark's. "Very well." They held paws for a moment, then Haru pulled away. "Now, if you'll excuse me."

She turned and reached up to push down on the handle, putting her weight against the door. As she made her way down the hall, her headache weakened to little more than a throb, and she began to think. She was going to have to tell her parents about this — at least, to some degree. They'd want to know why she was skipping work, after all.

So entrenched in her thoughts, she didn't notice the pokemon watching her as she left.


"Hey, Meaad. I need a room for two. Should only need it for a couple hours."

The simisear raised a brow, looking Vale up and down, then glanced behind him to look at Umbra. She stared back with a flat expression. After a few heartbeats, he closed his eyes, raised his hands palm-up to either side, and turned away. "Room for two? Coming right up."

Umbra continued watching him for a few more heartbeats before turning away to take in her surroundings. They were in another wooden building — one of the larger ones. On their side of the room, there was only the counter, a few plants, and an incline to a second floor. On the other side of the room, sat a pawful of matching furniture items. Chairs and tables, if she remembered the words correctly. Sunlight filtered through a handful of windows, creating patches of light throughout the room.

A couple pokemon sat at the tables, casting curious glances in her direction. She turned away and ignored them. Food scents wafted from their side of the room, and from an entryway beyond the tables. She could identify the smell of cooked meats and sickly sweet fruits. Her stomach growled, but she ignored that, too.

This room would be absolutely horrible if trouble showed up. There was the counter. Or perhaps under the tables, but they were too exposed for her liking. At least they made a makeshift weapon or shield, in a pinch.

"Ah, here we are."

The simisear's voice brought her attention back. He slid a small metal object across the counter, placing it in front of Vale. "One of you is dexterous, so I'll leave you to go to your room. Upstairs, last door on the left. Vale, if you happen to leave last, just come get me or the night staff We'll get the door locked for you. Either way, make sure to leave the key at the front when you're done." He glanced back to Umbra and smiled wryly. "Enjoy your time together."

Umbra stepped forward and grabbed the key, casting one more unamused glance at Meaad. Then she turned and made her way towards the ramp. Vale followed just behind, trotting until they were side by side.

Umbra leaned towards him and muttered into his ear, "Remind me why this is the best place for our discussion?"

Vale lowered his head and replied quietly. "Most places don't have the degree of privacy we need. I don't even trust my own home. And we can't go to the woods all the time or pokemon might get suspicious. Besides, the rumors that crop up from meeting here should provide some cover."

Umbra clenched her jaw. Right, the gross rumors he'd mentioned before. As much as she hated to admit it, he had a point. "If we want those rumors to stick, then we need to look the part," she grumbled, suppressing a shudder; if she had to act, then she would. And she considered herself quite the actress.

Glancing out of the corner of her eye, she made sure they were still being watched. Then she forced a smile, and — before he could protest — tilted her head up to nuzzle against Vale's lower jaw.

Ugh, how embarrassing. Thank Yveltal they were out of sight shortly after. At least that would get pokemon talking.

"Do not ever make me do that again," she said monotonously with a shake of her head.

"Hey, you're the one that chose to do it, don't look at me."

They said nothing more.

Halfway down the hall, a sound caught Umbra's attention. Muffled voices. One of them feminine and familiar.

She stopped. "Hold on. Does that not sound like the annoying bidoof?"

"Toshi?" Vale tilted his head. "No, but now that you mention it, it does sound sort of like Haru…"

Umbra strained her ears until she could figure out which room the sound was coming from. She approached, speaking. "Something strange is going on. Listen."

She leaned forward, pressing one ear against the door. Vale came up just behind and did similar.

"You said you've been there before," an unfamiliar, low-toned feminine voice said. "Is there… any chance you could take us? Maybe even a bit further up the mountain, if time permits?"

Umbra stole a glance at Vale. His eyes were narrow, and his lips drew back in the beginning of a silent snarl. They continued to listen for a few moments, long enough to hear Haru agree. Vale drew back and crept to the end of the hall, taking care to keep his claws from clicking against the wood. Umbra followed, smelling signs of an electrical current as she sidled up to him.

"Well?" she asked.

"This is suspicious," Vale growled. "I know that bidoof well enough to know she'd never go to the old shrine of her own free will." He looked back to the door and crouched, tail low and still. "I know we have matters to discuss, but I have a job to do. I need to deal with this first. We can make plans afterwards."

Umbra's claws twitched with frustration. This was a waste of her time. Nip was far more important than helping some pathetic little bidoof that got in over her head. Haru could get herself killed for all Umbra cared.

But at the same time, she could understand the feeling of obligation. The need to fulfill a duty. She let out a long huff, turning away. "Fine, but make it quick."

Vale dipped his head in understanding and lifted a paw. But before he could take a step, the small door swung open and Haru waddled out. Umbra and Vale froze, watching as she headed down the ramp without even noticing them.

"Now what?" Umbra asked.

"Follow my lead." Vale approached the door with that same light step, as if sneaking up on prey. Then he raised a paw to scratch at the door.

All chatter and movement stopped on the other side. There was a shuffling, then the small door creaked open, and a charmander poked her head out the door.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

Vale stood at attention, looking down at the charmander. "Yes, actually. We're with the local law enforcement. We'd just like a quick word." He glanced the charmander up and down. Sizing her up, Umbra presumed. "May we step inside?"

The charmander's brow furrowed. "If you need to, I guess. Is there a problem?" She stepped back.

"Probably not," Vale replied as he stooped and ducked through the smaller door. He jerked his head to gesture for Umbra to follow. "Just following up on a concerned inquiry from the innkeep. Said he saw a townie come up here with you guys." He glanced to the map on the floor, then at the other pokemon. You're the explorers that were staying in town, right? Could I see your badge for a moment?"

The charmander tittered. "Are you talking about Haru? She left a few moments ago, actually. You just missed her. But here you go." She picked up the badge, messing around with it for a few heartbeats before tossing it in Vale's direction. It landed on the ground with a metallic clatter.

He looked down at the badge through narrowed eyes, inspecting the surface. He sniffed it. Gave it an experimental lick. Then gingerly picked it up with his teeth and flipped it over, repeating the process.

Umbra crossed her arms, gaze flicking between Vale and the other pokemon. Subtly, she lifted her jaw, parting it in an attempt to appear larger and intimidating.

"Hmm," Vale finally said, still stooping. "This is a genuine explorer badge, alright." He stood up straight. "There's just one thing that seems off to me." He looked between the other three pokemon. "Where's your other establishing member, Miss… what was your name again?"

"Suli," the charmander answered. "And you mean Chamomile, the treeko? She's back at base, handling paperwork."

"I see. If you're Suli, that makes you the team lead? You have a lot of evolved pokemon with you for only being a charmander with a silver rank." He knocked the badge skidding across the floor in Suli's direction.

Umbra had no idea what he was talking about, but she got the idea that something was fishy about their story. The way the raichu was fidgeting backed up her thoughts.

Suli frowned and crossed her arms, tail flame flaring. "Does no one in this villiage know how to be hospitable? Seriously, do you treat all outsiders with this sort of disrespect?"

"Only ones that act suspicious," Umbra answered.

Vale bobbed his head in agreement. "Exactly. Now, if you really are who you say you are, you wouldn't mind coming down to the psychic courier to contact your branch and verify your identity, now would you?"

Umbra scanned the evolved pokemon again. The raichu was shifting uneasily again, while the charizard gave him a nervous glance. They weren't expecting to be challenged, she thought. They're lying about something, and they don't have an excuse ready.

Her attention shifted to the girafarig. Unlike the other two, he was staring at Vale with rapt attention and a serious expression. Such a serious expression, in fact, that it almost looked like…

The heartbeat it clicked in her head, she tackled Vale, sending him tumbling. A moment later, a foreign force sent her flying over him. She heard the wall splinter behind her, but it did not give.

The charmander dove for the chest, reaching for something inside. At the same time, Vale sprang back to his feet, a low growl in his throat. Umbra felt her fur stand on end heartbeats before bolts of electricity flew off of the manectric, striking everyone, including herself.

The charmander cried in pain and reeled back. And then, almost instantaneously, she was no longer a charmander, but a strange, pale-furred zoroark.

But she wasn't the only one that changed. One second, Umbra was looking at a perfectly normal charizard. The next, the two horns morphed into one. The girafarig's backside grew in size and became a dark mirror of its upper body. One side stared wide-eyed at the zoroark, the other glared at Vale

But the raichu's transformation was the most significant. Its fur turned dark orange, its ears shifting back. Horns grew from his head, and spikes appeared along his back. Umbra gaped at the raichu-like creature with undisguised shock.

Sparks danced around Vale's pelt as he fell out of his battle-ready stance. "What," he began, "the f—"

"HEY! WHAT'S GOING ON UP THERE?"

Everyone froze at the sound of the innkeeper's voice, bellowing from below. The pounding sound of a pokemon running up the ramp followed.

Vale shook out of his stupor first. He turned and raced through the door.

"Wait!" the zoroark growled, pouncing towards him.

Umbra intercepted her with a metallic headbutt, knocking her out of the air and sending her sprawling on the ground. She put one foot on the zoroark's torso, holding her second jaw up in a striking position.

"Vale, what in the blazes is going on in there?" Umbra turned her head so that she could watch Vale out of the corner of her eye, while still watching the Zoroark. She could just see the simisear steaming on the other side of Vale, through the door. "You know the rules. No fighting in the inn."

"Sorry about that, Meaad," Vale answered gruffly. He stood at attention, stiff and serious. "I had to put a sudden end to a dispute up here. Won't happen again. And if it does, I'll escort them out myself. We'll see if they like fighting after spending a night in jail."

"You have the space for that?" Meaad asked. Now he just sounded confused. Umbra wasn't surprised; Nip and Tempest wasted most of the jailspace, from the way Vale talked. There was no room for these four.

The simisear tried to lean around Vale. The zoroark gasped, then suddenly Umbra wasn't pinning her down, but instead a small, frail charmander. The other pokemon changed back to normal forms as well.

Meaad let out a huff of air and looked back at Vale. "Right. Then see to it."

Umbra heard receding footsteps, then Vale slipped back through the door, kicking it shut behind him. An invisible force shoved her, then the disguised zoroark slithered out from beneath her and scampered back to stand in front of the others.

"Now, where were we?" Vale asked, lazily looking the pokemon over. His gaze settled on the "charmander" and he clenched his jaw. "Oh, right. Listen. I got him off your tail, but that doesn't mean you're free to go. Now talk."

There was a pause, then the zoroark shed her fake form. Her teammates remained disguised, however. She tilted her head and crossed her arms, lips drawn back in a snarl. "Why should we?"

Umbra mimicked her pose, raising her back jaw overhead to show off her maw and rows of pointed teeth. "I don't think you understand the situation you're in, Zoroark."

Vale stepped forward, sparks rippling through his fur as he continued where Umbra left off. "We just caught you red-pawed with a stolen Expedition Society badge, impersonating a team. You're looking at cycles of jail time. Or worse, if I report you as attacking a guard. But I'm giving you a chance to explain yourselves. A chance to explain why you're doing this and — perhaps if your answer is satisfactory — a chance to lessen your charges."

The zoroark's expression faltered. She turned her head to look back at the rest of her team. Each nodded to her before her gaze shifted to the next. Umbra could feel a headache coming on. But to her surprise, the zoroark turned back, the rest of the illusion dropping.

"Fine," the zoroark began with a sigh. "My name is Susana. We're not explorers. We're an advance team for a group that sailed in from offshore. We made landfall a few months — moons — ago."

"Offshore?" Vale asked with a tilt of his head. "How far are we talking?"

"A whole continent," the zoroark answered.

"Preposterous," Umbra cut in. "There is no way to safely travel across the sea. The stars guide us, but the methods for transporting many pokemon would be impossible."

"I can't help it if you haven't figured out how to advance that far," Susana snarled. "Believe it or not, that's on you, but I am only speaking the truth now."

Umbra wasn't convinced, but she gestured for the zoroark to continue.

"We've been researching the gods that the pokemon on this continent follow in an effort to compare them to our own stories. And to, perhaps, further advance our society." She crossed her arms again. "But that's all you're getting out of me."

Umbra gave Vale a serious look. "So, what are you going to do?"

Vale's tail swished back and forth twice before he answered. "Take them in, I guess, for impersonating. I can write off most of the other stuff, but their explanation is unsatisfactory for that. And there's an argument to be had that they took advantage of Meaad's discounted accommodations for pokemon working for incorporated powers."

The zoroark's expression turned aggressive once again. "Now hold on—"

But before she could say more, Umbra held up a paw to stop her. "Wait. I have an idea. Clearly you four have something you're still hiding. Perhaps we can… come to an agreement."

Vale lowered his head so that it was next to Umbra's and spoke in a low tone. "What are you getting at?"

Umbra turned back to speak to him directly, keeping her second jaw facing the strange pokemon. "Think about it. The way they talk, they're in deep trouble if they get caught. We may be able to use that to our advantage. To deal with our… situation."

"Oh. I see." Vale's tail stuck out stiffly behind him. "But which part?"

"Nip. We can discuss how to get back at Jhorlo separately. Though we may be able to twist this to make him look bad."

"You know I can hear everything you're saying, right?" Susana interjected.

Vale exchanged one last serious glance with Umbra, then straightened up as she turned. "Good," he began. "Then you should understand your situation. You help us with something and get out of town, we pretend none of this happened."

The raichu-like creature glared at him through narrowed eyes. "And why should we? There's four of us and only two of you. We could just knock you out and get out of here on our own.

"And there's at least four pokemon below us that would come running at the sound of battle," Umbra responded nonchalantly. She had a feeling it was a bluff; most of the pokemon here were far too soft to get involved. But it still got her point across. "And if you run off, then you don't get to go to the shrine like you wanted."

"That's right," Vale added, taking a threatening step forward. "And what do you think happens to pokemon that attack a guard? I'll give you a hint. I've always wondered what zoroark tastes like."

Susana froze, eyes wide. The false raichu was less restrained. "You're sick!" he shouted, sparks flying from his cheek-sacs.

But neither Umbra nor Vale acknowledged him. Instead, they kept their eyes on Susana.

"F-fine. Fine," she finally said, ears laying flat against her skull. "What are your demands?"

Umbra grinned, showing her fangs as she stepped forward. "We have a certain… troublesome pokemon locked up here. A sneasel. I need him… gotten rid of. Killed, for his crimes against my kin. But the village has been too soft on him. You capture him for me, so I can finish the job, and this little incident stays quiet."

"Where is the sneasel?" the charizard asked. "Just in the jail?"

"He works various community service jobs during the day," Vale answered. "But we keep him locked in the jail at night, along with a ninetales. If you get rid of the ninetales, too, great. But I'm less concerned about him."

Susana mulled it over a minute, reaching up to scratch behind her ear. "Seems like a reasonable deal. There's just one problem. We're leaving tomorrow. So if you want to make this work, it best be fast."

"What?" Sparks bounced out of Vale's fur, dying away on the floor as he crouched. "What happened to bringing the bidoof back?"

"Oh, that?" Susana didn't miss a beat. "Skorch here" — she gestured to the charizard — "was going to fly her back when we were done, while the rest of us prepare to scale up the mountain."

"That's a fool's errand," Vale warned, though he returned to a neutral stance. "Going up the mountain, I mean. More capable pokemon than I have perished on the climb. But if you insist, well, it seems like a reasonable plan."

Umbra couldn't care less what they did with the bidoof. For all she cared, they could take her back or leave her to starve, so long as Nip was captured. She crossed her arms and tilted her head, so that she was staring Susana in the eye. "Well? Do we have a deal?"

"What do you guys think?" Susana turned back to her team. "Topaz? Skorch?"

"No issues," the fake raichu answered.

"None from me," Skorch replied. "Remer?"

The girafarig shifted in his nest. "I think we should come to a compromise." Both heads looked directly at Umbra. Her skin crawled as she stared back at the unnatural pokemon, but she refused to let it show.

"You want the sneasel," he continued, "and we want up the mountain without interruption. I say we nab the sneasel and take him with us up the mountain. Alive. If we return empty-pawed, or don't return at all, then you can rat us out. But this gives us… insurance that you'll keep your word."

Umbra scowled, narrowing her eyes. "I refuse to let that waste of breath, that blight on Yveltal's good name, leave my sight."

"Then what do you suggest?" Susana asked flatly.

Umbra's simplest answer was that she just refused to compromise, flat out. But she suspected that would not go over well. So instead, she found a separate option. "I will accompany you. I care not what you're doing, nor how long it takes, so long as I am able to finish him at the end." Perhaps she shouldn't be so single-minded. But she was sick of waiting.

The false explorers shared a glance between each other. No words were spoken, but they clearly were of a single mind. Finally, Susana turned back.

"Fine, that can be arranged."

"There's one possible issue," Topaz said, raising a paw. "What about the bidoof? How is she going to react to all this?"

"I doubt she'll raise a stink," Vale answered. "She doesn't like the sneasel either. She doesn't want him here and she wants him to see real justice as much as we do."

Umbra wasn't entirely convinced. The bidoof had tried to stop her before, when they'd first tried to catch Nip. But that was also before his crimes were proven. Perhaps it would be different now.

Skorch's voice brought her attention back to the conversation. "We can do a trade off, if needed. So long as we're careful. With a bit of direction, I can fly to catch up, covertly pass off the sneasel, while Haru is distracted at the shrine, then fly her back."

Susana tilted her head. "It's risky, but I suppose that works."

"What about Jhorlo?" Vale's voice came in a low tone, just beside her ear.

She could care less about Jhorlo. Once she was out of here, he was Vale's problem. But she had a feeling he wouldn't appreciate that answer. "We can discuss that privately. I don't think we can expect help for that one from these pokemon."

Vale seemed satisfied enough with the answer, as he stood up. "Seems reasonable," he said to the others. "Then do we have a deal?"

Susana bobbed her head. "I believe we do." Then she took a seat, picking up a map that had been left on the ground. "Now, what do you have in mind?"
 

love

Memento mori
Pronouns
he/him/it
Partners
  1. leafeon
A/N: Special thanks to my beta readers, SparklingEspeon, ShadowVulpi, and deerestove

I've become a stove, oh no!

Anyway, I'll give some overall thoughts.

I think it is cool that we see some courage from Haru here. She is averse to risking her own life but more averse to risking loved ones'. Umbra and Vale have a sort of amusing chemistry as well. As she remarks, they aren't so different:

But at the same time, she could understand the feeling of obligation. The need to fulfill a duty.

I think the bit about swapping Nip for Haru is clearer in this draft, but I'm still not sure why Team Fakers couldn't just climb the mountain, kill Umbra, do whatever with Haru, not bother snatching Nip, and run away. I guess doing that would arguably be as risky as the original plan, depending on how confident they are in their Nip-snatching skills and if they want to go near the town again.

But things sure are heating up, and Nip is sure to have a blast next chapter. I wonder if Haru will intervene on Nip's behalf. I also wonder if Nip is going to feel more resigned to the possibility of his death this time around, given his present religious doubts and guilt.
 
22: Night Talks

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
Night Talks


The sun was starting to dip behind Mount Domo, casting deep shadows into the woods as Haru arrived home. Though she had steadily made her way back, she froze just outside the door, heart fluttering. Would Shimmer and Muse still be here, waiting to confront her? And what of Toshi and her parents? She'd skipped out on work after their spat, something that hadn't happened in cycles. Just thinking about the coming earful was painful enough.

There was only one sensible thing to do.

Haru pushed through through the entry curtain and made straight for her room, replying to her mother's greeting with little more than a grunt.

She paused again just inside. Her room was sparse; she'd never found much need for little trinkets and other specialty items. They were a waste of money. Though she had a shelf, it only held a few well-worn books and a couple old wood-whittled figures. She'd made one a few cycles back, part of a short-lived art experiment. The other was a gift from her grandfather.

She made a straight line for a nest tucked in the back corner of the room, passing a low desk along the way. There, she collapsed faced down, burying herself in the straw without bothering to take her bags off.

And she remained like that for some time. At some point, her father stopped in her doorway and tried to make conversation, but she just grunted at him. She was left alone after that.

But she couldn't avoid her family forever. Eventually, the call for dinner forced her to climb to her paws. Only then did she bother slipping out of her bags and returning to the common room.

Toshi had already sat at the table, as had her dad. Her mom had prepped dinner tonight and was currently setting portions and drinks around the table. The scent of fresh bread and caramelized carrots sent her stomach rumbling.

She avoided her brother's gaze as she took a seat across from him. A chunk of bread with dipping oil, a simple salad, and a few roasted veggies in a savory sauce were spread across the plate in front of her. A cup of water sat to the side, but a small dispenser of spiced oran wine was at the center of the table. She wondered if her parents brought it out for a special occasion, or if they planned to drink to forget everything going on in the village. She was tempted, herself, but she couldn't run the risk of getting tipsy tonight. Not when she needed to get up early.

They ate in silence for a few moments, none wanting to broach the subject of her earlier behavior.

Her mom was the first to speak, her sentences punctuated between bites of food. "Well. You were right, Chip. That sneasel can do some good work. A shame he doesn't apply himself. Perhaps things would have turned out better for him if he did."

"Are you thinking of asking for his help again?" Chip asked. "'Gigas knows we could use it right now."

Haru groaned inwardly. Oh please no, she thought. I can't deal with that right now. Just send him off to the Enforcers already. But she kept her thoughts to herself, not looking to bring any attention.

"Perhaps," Saku answered. "His help came in handy today, considering we were short handed. Which reminds me…" Her gaze drifted to Haru, who shrank down behind the table. "Dear… You didn't come back from your break. Toshi told us you ran off. What happened?"

"It was nothing important," Haru answered quickly, paws digging into the fabric. "I just needed some fresh air. I went to town and then…" She trailed off, silently cursing herself. In all the excitement, then worry, she hadn't bothered to come up with an excuse for tomorrow's absence. If she was already being pestered about today, how was she supposed to explain running off with some explorers without sounding weird? If her parents knew the truth, they'd probably think she was going to the shrine out of spite and try to talk her out of it.

Was she going out of spite?

No. She was going to protect Toshi. That's all.

"I got to talking with some travelers while I was there," she began, mind racing as she formed the lie. Her stomach twisted with guilt. "And they asked me to help with a job. They needed some logging done down river and I offered to help out." She fought the urge to cringe. Now that she said it, the story sounded pretty weak.

"Travelers, huh?" Chip asked, pulling a bowl of wine closer. "You wouldn't happen to mean that group of explorers staying at the inn, would you?"

Haru swallowed and forced a smile. "Those are the ones. They were looking at setting up a camp. More of an outpost really. I don't think the village would agree to let them build one here, Jhorlo least of all. But no one owns the woods outside the village. It wouldn't be a bad idea to have one nearby in case of emergencies, you know?"

"Sure," Chip answered carefully. "But it has the potential to take away business from old Meaad. We see Society teams more often than we do any other type of traveler, save maybe merchants. Why would they come here if they got their own place?"

"Well, they wouldn't have a hot, fresh meal if they're out in the woods," Saku pointed out.

"I think it's pretty cool," Toshi said, eyes sparkling. "Think about how much we could learn if there's more permanent teams in the area! I wish I was going instead."

Haru's stomach twisted again. She hated how easily the lie had come, but at the same time, Toshi's reaction made her all the more certain she was doing the right thing by hiding the truth.

The conversation shifted to questions about Shimmer and Muse's wellbeing, then other topics that Haru didn't care to chime in on. Her attention drifted in and out as she picked at her food, her appetite waning.

Dinner ended with the last rays of sunlight. Chip excused himself to take his herbs, and Toshi retreated to his room to read. Only Haru and her mother remained.

Just as Haru opened her mouth to excuse herself, Saku said, "Would you be a dear and help me clean up?"

Haru bit back a sigh. She should be getting to bed, considering she needed to rise early. But there was no use in debating her mom. If she tried to argue that she could make her own decisions, her mom would point out that she wasn't the homeowner, and that meant she had to help out around the house. Standing on her hind paws, she reached out across the table to gather up the dishes. Saku handed her a jar of luminous moss before taking the dishes, then the two of them staggered outside.

They stopped at the edge of the dam, pushing through the reeds until they were in the muddy shallows. A large stone stuck out along the edge, the top dry. There, they placed their burdens. Haru and Saku each took one of the ceramic plates and dunked them into the water.

"Is everything okay, Haru?"

Saku's question caught her off guard. She froze for a heartbeat, wide-eyed. "Of course. Why wouldn't they be?" She fought to keep the unease out of her voice.

Saku looked down at the water for a moment, silent. "Well… It's just… you've been acting strange lately, dear. Ever since that Sneasel showed up. When he first appeared, you were so interested in showing him around. I thought it great, since you rarely get out. But then he… well, you know."

It was clear her mom didn't want to bring up Nip's heinous act. And it made Haru wonder: if it bothered her so much, then why was she willing to work with him?

But she didn't get a chance to voice her thoughts, as her mom just kept plowing on. "And then you ran off with your friends into a dungeon—a dungeon—to apprehend him. I would have expected it out of Toshi, what with his adventurous streak. But you? I would have thought you'd avoid it, or try to talk them down."

"I did try," Haru argued. "I just figured… it was better if I went with them, to keep them out of trouble."

"Even the second time?" Saku pressed. It seemed that was a rhetorical question, because she continued, "But it wasn't just that. Since then, you've been in a foul mood—don't think I haven't noticed. And now you're running off with strangers. Is there something wrong? You know you can talk to me, right?"

Haru fought to control her annoyance, then wondered why she was so annoyed. "Well, I'm not really running off with strangers," she said. "I'm running off to do a job for strangers. I think there's a difference there. As for the other stuff…" She trailed off, taking a deep breath. Surely her mom could understand her anger?

"I went into Sunglow Thicket for two reasons. I already said the first. The second time, I wanted to make sure Nip faced proper judgment, instead of being offed by someone willing to take hostages just to get to him. He was brought back, all but admitted to the destruction of several eggs—most of them maliciously—and then got nothing more than community service. Surely you can understand why I'm frustrated?"

Saku sat her rinsed dishes on the stone, then pushed out further into the water, disappearing beneath the rippling surface. Haru remained in the shallows, blinking. But her mother returned a minute later, expression pensive. She gestured for Haru to follow her out. With a sigh, the rest of the dishes were cast aside, and Haru slipped into the cool water.

There was no danger in this small pool, created by their own handiwork. And there would be no prying ears in the center.

"I do understand," Saku said once Haru joined her. "But I also know much of your behavior is unhealthy. Toshi told me about how you left earlier, though he wouldn't go into the details." The bibarel tilted her head upwards, gazing at the stars. Her wet fur glistened in the moonlight. "Whatever's going on, I can't force you to tell me. But I want you to know that I'm here, if you ever need to talk."

Treading water, Haru turned so that she was facing her mother. She struggled to find her words. How was her behavior unhealthy? Sure, she'd been quick to anger recently. She could admit as much. But surely that anger was justified? "I know," she finally said. "I'm still figuring some of it out for myself. But if I need anything, I'll let you know."

"Good girl," her mother replied. "Now, we should get to bed. We wouldn't want to catch a chill!" Her tail slapped the surface of the water, and she dove, reappearing back in the shallows. Haru followed behind slowly. She stopped for a moment to load the dishes onto her mother's tail. Then they both went inside.

Haru lay awake for some time after that, tossing and turning in her nest. Worry gnawed at her as she went over the conversation with her mom. Should she tell her mom the truth? About where she was going?

No. It would only worry her more. And the last thing she wanted was to worry her.

Soon, she drifted into a fitful sleep.


Once again, an endless expanse of water stretched out before Nip, mimicking the orange of the cloudless sky. The fur on the back of his neck prickled as he walked through the shallows, sending ripples on the otherwise still surface. He was vaguely aware that he was dreaming, and that it was the same dream that he'd had countless times. But he couldn't fathom why he was here again.

The same hill from his previous dreams—the one with the dying tree—appeared in the distance, the tree's branches spreading wide like outstretched claws. Involuntarily, he sped up, light on his feet as he raced towards the hill. Every time he dreamed of this place, he always fell into deep water before he reached it—and he'd had the dream several times since Celebi's appearance. The last thing he wanted was to wake up from the sensation of water filling his lungs, choking the life out of him.

But as he approached, the water remained shallow, only reaching his ankles. His pace slowed as he reached the base of the hill.

Tall grass waved in an imperceptible breeze. Beams of dying sunlight poked between the branches of the tree, dappling the grass with golden pools. He slunk up the soggy bank and into the neck-deep blades, climbing until he reached the base of the tree.

Thin ashen bark peppered the base of the tree, cracked and peeling away to reveal pale wood beneath. The bark thinned away further up the twisting trunk, disappearing around the gnarled branches. No leaves remained. Nip knew little about trees, but if this one wasn't dead already, surely it was dying?

His attention shifted to its base, where roots poked up through the dirt. Nestled between two of these roots, something out of place caught his eye. A blood-colored feather. He picked it up.

The feather was nearly as long as his arm and mostly that deep blood color, tapering to a midnight black as it reached the afterfeather. Nip wracked his brain as he tried to come up with different pokemon the feather could have come from. It was too big for a sneasel, and they didn't usually taper to black. Talonflame, maybe? But he didn't think they had feathers this long, either. It would have to be an incredibly large one.

Then a long-buried memory of a lesson back in his old nesting grounds surfaced, and he pictured an old historic painting. Though the details faded with time, he could still picture the deep bloody feathers of a bird—his patron—perched on a tree with her wings spread wide.

"Yveltal?" His voice was barely more than a whisper, pulled away and made inaudible by a sudden gust of wind.

This feather belonged to Yveltal. It had to. Then was this the tree from the painting? It couldn't be; it was old and wizened and dead. The tree in the painting was lush and vibrant. Covered with plant life and teeming with the spirits of the departed. This was a stark opposite.

He turned and raced away from the tree, fur bristling as he scanned the sky for any signs of his god. All the while calling out, "Yveltal! Yveltal I am here! Is this a vision? Is this something more? What do you need of me?"

A quiet splish-splash signaled that he had run back into the water. His foot caught on something just beneath the surface. Stumbling, he waved his arms wildly, but it was no use. With a yowl, he tumbled into the water. Deep into the water, as if the bank weren't even there. An invisible current pulled him away from land, dragging him deeper and deeper into the depths. The feather spiraled up and away, leaving him behind in the darkness, lungs burning.

But he wasn't alone.

The current swirled as a massive, dark figure swam around him. Vision blurred by water, he couldn't see well. But as the figure came to a stop just above him, watching him sink, he could just make out the form of two great dark wings, and two bright blue eyes that glowed with some emotion he couldn't place.

He opened his mouth to say something, only to gag and panic as he sucked in a lungful of water. No, not water. This fluid was thicker, more viscous, and had a familiar flavor. Yolk. He was drowning in egg yolk. He flailed, desperate to reach the surface, but his vision was fading fast. And soon, all he could make out were those two smoldering eyes.

Before the end, he heard a voice.

You do not belong…


Nip gasped awake, coughing and sputtering. He flailed in the darkness, rolling onto his belly as if to vomit up swallowed water. But nothing came.

Of course nothing came; it was just a nightmare. He was still in Theran village, hidden away in his cell.

Bits of straw clung to his fur as he sat up, blinking. His flailing had scattered his nest, leaving him exposed. As he looked around the dimly-lit room, he could see two pairs of eyes watching him. One was Tempest, his expression betraying worry. The other was tonight's night guard, Anu.

He turned away from both of them, stood, and began to pace his small space, keeping his head low.

What was he supposed to make of his dream? He'd had it several times, but this time it was different. He'd found that feather… Yveltal's feather, he was sure of it!

Did that make this more than a dream? A vision? He wasn't a psychic. He'd never been gifted—or cursed, for that matter—with the power of prophecy. And yet, he'd had the same dream so many times; that had to mean something!

So what was he supposed to make of the ending? You do not belong. Who had said it? Yveltal? Was Yveltal abandoning him? Did Yeveltal even care about him to begin with?

A tiny, pathetic whimper escaped his lips as he scraped his claws together, catching on every nick and chip. Some of the damage came from hard labor, while other parts came from striking at his cell walls as he tried to calm his frazzled nerves. It wasn't like he was using them for anything else, anyways. He couldn't remember the last time he'd hunted; it was some time before arriving here, in this cursed town that had destroyed his last shred of hope.

With another whimper, he slumped to the ground, cheek meeting the wood flooring.

"Having nightmares, are you, Nip?"

Anu's question brought Nip out of his sulking. He turned his head so that he could see the lucario, but did not rise or otherwise reply.

"You were twitching and mewling in your sleep," Anu continued. His tone was factual, neither accusatory nor comforting. The corner's of his mouth twisted upwards. And for just a moment, Nip thought he might be enjoying his suffering. But the rest of his body language suggested otherwise. "Ah, please forgive me. I… do not mean to pry. It's just…"

Anu took a deep breath. "I… I know you are religious. We spoke of your patron before. I don't know how central Celebi is to your beliefs. B-but I know his appearance has left many of the faithful shaken. Celebi does not act like the myths say. What does that mean about the rest of the myths? About everything we grew up believing? If your nightmares are anything of that nature, I can't say I blame you, but know that you are not alone."

What do you know, Nip thought ruefully. Still, he sat up so that he could better look at Anu. And Tempest, for that matter. The ninetales watched from his own cell, tails slowly waving, almost hypnotic.

"I find it curious," Anu continued, following Nip's gaze. "Celebi's appearance has affected you far more than it has Tempest. Why is that?"

Nip considered ignoring him. What good would it do to talk about this? But after a moment, he realized Anu was giving him something other than his dreams to focus on. Or trying to, at least.

"Tempest really should be the one telling you about this," he began, shifting so that he was in a more comfortable position, "but I supposed that isn't an option right now. Tempest wasn't born to the Half-Moon tribe. Instead, he joined as an adult. He's told me that, as a child, he belonged to a separate tribe from further north, a group of ice-types that worshiped the remains of the Original Dragon, Kyurem.

"Kyurem was not known to be kind to the living. At best, it was a callous defender of its followers. But some of their stories described it as openly malicious to mortals. And yet, they still followed it, because they believed themselves to be Kyurem's chosen, the only ones that it looked after." He glanced at Tempest. "Did I remember that correctly?"

Tempest dipped his head.

"How fascinating," Anu said, shifting in place. He took a deep breath and held it for some time before continuing. "Perhaps I can use this to illustrate my point. From… From what you've told me, there are conflicting stories about this Kyurem. Some characterize it as a defender, others as something more sinister. And it's hard to believe that both of these stories could be true. In fact, it's entirely possible that they're not. But there are more than two stories. I imagine there are countless tales."

His paw came alight with aura as he waved it in the air. "I imagine there are many conflicting stories about Celebi, as well. The myths around here characterize him as a valiant hero, traveling through time to bring both the blessings and the curses of the future. He's said to be noble and stalwart, and always having the interests of the good at heart."

"Yes, that's not too far from our stories," Nip replied. "What is your point?"

"Well, we've now met Celebi, and know he exists. And we also know that the legends weren't entirely correct. And yet, there are still morsels of truth based on what we've seen. He did come to warn us, a small village, of dangers, even if he went about it in a… strange way. And knowing that part of the story is true, we must find comfort in that." Anu's voice grew firm. "Perhaps we need to revisit our legends. Reevaluate what we hold true. But in the end, we still cannot know everything. And we will have to take some things on faith."

Faith. That was easy for Anu to say. He wasn't the one whose every decision, every justification for everything questionable he ever did, was shattered by the legends being wrong. Then he mentally berated himself for thinking like that. Anu had to contend with the cruelties of the world, too, and shaken beliefs made that harder.

"Thanks," he finally said, "but… there's more to it than that."

"Oh?" Anu tilted his head, then scooted a little closer to the cell. "If you wish to talk about it, I'm all ears."

"What?" Nip flinched and copied Anu's expression, his ear twisting flat against his skull. "Why would you want to know? Do you wish to mock me?"

Anu was quiet for a moment. "I-if I'm speaking honestly, a part of me wants to. N-not mocking necessarily." He held his paws up in a defensive gesture. "Just… Just let you wallow in your misery, r-rather.

"B-but I won't!" He continued before Nip could reply. "Because I have a job to do. Despite everything, it would be unbecoming of me. I could yell and scream and hurt you, but it would go against everything I stand for." A beat of silence followed. "And I hope—perhaps foolishly—that extending kindness to you will help you settle, and finally understand our way of life. And then, perhaps, you can be sent on your way."

Nip's anger dissipated, replaced with surprise. And confusion. His fur slowly lay flat, and the tension left his shoulders.

Anu watched him unblinkingly, then he turned his head and stood. "There… is one other thing I wanted to talk to you about," he began. He turned and disappeared into a small room. A rustling sound followed, then he returned with a small bag in his paws, the long drawstring hanging down loosely.

"Here," Anu said, passing the bag between the bars. "I remember you eyeing this a few days back. Consider it a… peace offering of sorts."

Nip blinked, eying the bag cautiously. It certainly looked like the same bag, and it looked empty. But it made no sense.

"Why?"

Anu sighed, dropping the bag just inside Nip's cell. "As I just said, holding a grudge would be hypocritical. I've… struggled to forgive you after what you did to my mate and I. But perhaps, with kindness, I can make you understand what it means to be a village pokemon. And perhaps I'll be able to break the cycle of revenge." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then sat down with his back straight. "The law will punish you for what you did wrong. My duty is to guide you on how to be better. So. If you ever need to talk about matters of faith, or anything at all, I will do my best to listen and assist."

For a moment, Nip stared at the bag laying at his paws, struggling to process his feelings. Based on everything he'd ever been taught, Anu shouldn't be helping him, shouldn't offer forgiveness. Even if he had reasons for doing what he did, and even if it was just the laws of nature, he still hurt Anu. And he struggled to fathom how he could just let it go like this. Or try to, at least.

At the same time, relief warmed his chest. Perhaps, if there was anyone that could provide answers to him, it would be Anu. And perhaps there was something he could help him with right now.

"Well," Nip began, fiddling with his claws. "There is… something I'd like to talk to you about." Anu gestured for him to continue, so he took a hesitant breath. "Over the last few days I've been having these… recurring dreams…"

But before he could continue, the sound of ruffling fabric caught their attention. Nip scented an electric current heartbeats before Vale stalked through the entryway, giving off frustrated sparks.

"Vale?" Anu stood up, tilting his head. "What are you doing here?"

"I work here," Vale replied with a snort. "Do I need a reason? But if you must know, I actually came here to fetch you, Anu. I was passing by the temple on a night patrol and saw one of those explorers. He asked to see you."

"Did you tell him I was busy?"

"Of course. Told him it was too early. Told him a bad time and to come back later after the sun had fully risen. Even threatened to chase him off. But he was insistent."

Anu sighed, then glanced out the window. It was still dark. "Well, I can't go and see him right now, anyways. So he'll just have to wait till after my relief comes in, at least." His words were punctuated by a yawn.

"If you need relief, I can take over," Vale replied. He walked over to stand beside Anu. "You're just watching the prisoners for a while, right? I can take over until you get back. Already finished my rounds."

"No, he can wait." Anu shook his head. "It would be unbecoming of me to leave my duty incomplete."

"But what about your duty to the patrons of the temple," Vale countered, sparking. "I know you have a few visitors in the mornings. What if he heckles them like he did me."

This, at least, seemed to make Anu hesitate.

Nip watched the exchange through narrowed eyes. Why was Vale so insistent on taking over? He knew from experience that Vale didn't care to be around him or Tempest. Was he just looking for a way to harass them? Surely even Vale wouldn't go that far?

Finally, Anu sighed. "Very well. I will see if I can convince him to leave without a fight." His attention turned to Nip. "Apologies. We will continue this conversation another time." With a rustle of fabric, he was gone.

Vale lay down in front of the cells, watching Nip and Tempest with his mouth clamped shut. He looked in no mood to converse, and Nip didn't expect he had anything nice to say anyways, so he took a moment to gather up his scattered nest and settled down as if to sleep. But his nerves wouldn't let him. He felt electrified, alert after Anu's conversation. He doubted he would get any more rest, but he could at least lie down until the guards took him out in the morning.

He wasn't sure how long he lay there awake. It must have been some time, because he could see the faintest outline of light around the doorway when the sound of a commotion outside caught his attention. Curious, he sat up.

Vale was already on his feet, letting out a guttural growl while sparks danced in his fur. "Hey! What's going on out there?" he barked, stalking towards the entrance with his head low and hackles raised.

A burst of flame greeted him, blasting him in the face as it engulfed the fabric covering. He let out a surprised yelp, stumbling back.

Nip scrambled to his feet and pressed himself into the shadows in the corner of his cell. The acrid scent of burnt fur made him gag as he watched, looking for signs of life in the manectric. Vale groaned and shifted, but did not try to get up. Sparks danced weakly on his pelt but went nowhere.

As the flames died away, the attacker became clear. A great dark beast—a charizard with some physical quirks unfamiliar to him—rose to her feet. Her tail flicked back and forth as she watched Vale for signs of resistance. Then she snorted smoke and turned towards the door.

"Subdued," she announced with a growl.

"Excellent," came a reply from just outside.

Nip's blood turned to ice. He stiffened, still crouching. He knew that voice all too well.

Flames still crackled in the doorway, illuminating a stout, familiar figure.

Umbra.

Tempest sprang to his paws in an instant, lips curled in a soundless snarl. He stalked on the other side of his cell, hackles raised as the air in the room chilled. Nip's breath came out in frosty puffs as he pressed himself against the wall. Umbra was here. Umbra was here. Why was Umbra here?

He knew. He knew he knew he knew. He knew exactly why she was here.

She entered the room with a leisurely gait, eyes trailing over the charizard and the downed Vale, then to Tempest, before her eyes finally settled on Nip. He knew she could see him. Smell him. He must be giving off a fear-scent…

Her posture shifted; if it had been anyone else, he could mistake her expression for friendly. But there was no hiding the malicious intent in her eyes.

Without taking her eyes off of Nip, she said to the charizard, "Find the keys, would you, Skorch?" The charizard lumbered away, leaving Nip her sole focus.

"Oh, how I have waited for this day," she began, her tone light and airy. "More than six moons, you have evaded my grasp. Managed to slink away. No, it has been longer, has it not? You have been a thorn in my side since the day we were made mates. But no more. Finally, almost three cycles of careful work is paying off."

The strange charizard returned, dropping a ring of keys into Umbra's outstretched claws. She looked at them, frowning. "How am I supposed to use these, exactly?"

"It's not that difficult. Just stick one in the hole and turn until one of them unlocks the door." The charizard snorted smoke.

"Do not patronize me," Umbra snapped back. Then she started sticking keys in, one at a time. By the third or fourth key, the cell door swung open. Just like that, the only barrier between himself and Umbra was gone.

Nip tried to form frost around him, to call forth an ice shard. But he couldn't focus. He could only press himself against the wall as she marched towards him with a degree of nonchalance. She knew she had won, and she was taking the time to gloat.

"All the lies, all the cruelty and misdeeds, only to end like this. It is kind of pathetic, is it not?" She chuckled. "Then again, you always were pathetic. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Somehow. Nip found his tongue. And despite his defeat, bitter resentment coated his mouth and gave him the courage to growl a single sentence.

"You're a monster."

Claws struck his cheek, then a blow to his stomach sent him reeling. He screeched, crumpling to the ground as white-hot pain radiated where fairy energy burned his skin—no, his very spirit. He felt his will to fight fading, succumbing to the pain. Why had he ever expected anything different? It always ended like this, with his face against the ground, a growing pain in his ribs, and Umbra standing over him, reminding him of how useless he was. Any time he showed defiance, this was the outcome. He should have known his death would be the same.

Then a blast of frigid wind sent him rolling backwards. He heard Umbra grunt and several dull thunks as he tried to climb to his feet, pelted by slush and chunks of ice. As his vision focused, he could see Tempest crouching with his gaze concentrated on Umbra, focused on creating more ice as he froze the air around him. He was attacking the mawile; Nip just happened to be caught in the blizzard.

Umbra snarled, marching towards Tempest despite the layer of frost accumulating on her steely fur, only to fall short due to the bars between them. With a frustrated snort, she tossed the keys toward the charizard. "He clearly has a talent for surviving certain death and causing me trouble. Here. Deal with him." Her gaze shifted to the wooden floor and the furniture. "Or better yet… send this place up in flames. Then we can leave unimpeded while they deal with the fire."

"What?"

Vale sprang to his paws with speed that surprised Nip. Clearly he wasn't as injured as he'd first looked. "You can't do that," he sputtered. Do you have any idea how far that'll set back the town? And whose hide do you think it's going to come out of? Jhorlo's not a total idiot!"

"He will figure it out either way. My disappearance and Nip's disappearance will be proof enough for him."

The manectric grunted, crouching. "Yes, but the destruction of the town isn't necessary. What if the fire spreads? Our quarrel is with Jhorlo and with the sneasel."

"We don't have time for this," the massive charizard growled, her tail flicking restlessly back and forth. "The lucario could return at any time. Just grab the sneasel and—"

Nip was suddenly blinded by bright light, spots blooming in his vision. Yelps and grunts filled the air. But through it, Umbra still stood tall, her attention focused on Tempest, the source of the attack.

"Just do it," she snapped. "Before the ninetales gives us away."

She was distracted. Nip crawled forward, claws digging into the wood as he dragged himself towards his cell door. This was his chance. If he could just reach the door, he could make a run for it. Even with the charizard on her side, he could hide in the bushes outside town. Get to the river and destroy his scent trail. He could run again, and find somewhere to start over.

But doing so meant leaving Tempest behind to die. Umbra would never let Tempest live if his distraction let Nip escape. Leaving him to die was the coward's way out.

And yet, Tempest was causing a distraction now. Was he just fighting back? Or was he trying to give Nip an opening to escape?

Heart heavy with guilt and confusion, Nip continued to crawl out the cell door. Dawn light—freedom—was only a few bounds away.

Fire erupted on his back, his world exploding in agony. The horrible smell of burnt fur and flesh choked him as he screamed, ears ringing. He scrambled, dragging himself forward. But the fire followed, until finally, he quit trying to avoid it. Though the flames died, the pain remained. He felt pressure on his back, digging into the fresh wounds. He had no strength to crawl.

Somehow both nearby and distant at the same time, he heard Umbra's voice. "Hurry up and set a fire. All that screaming will have attracted someone. Then we run. Vale, you need to look injured, go to…" But whatever else she was saying was lost. His cheek hit the ground, then the world went dark.
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, been a while, but I've got PWCH on my Reading Rookidee hitlist and a review exchange that I need to make good on, and figured that the two Bonuses you wrote up that I didn't review yet were as good a place as any to jump in on a night that's a bit tighter on time. So let's get this show rolling:

Bonus 2

Okay, so full disclosure, this bonus was written as a prize for me and I've read it once a while back. But, I didn't review it, and it's been long enough that giving it a once-over is probably called for. Anywho...

"Grandpa! Grandpa! Wake up! It's Titans Harvest!"

The elderly bibarel let out an "ompf" as he was roused from his sleep by a solid tackle. He blinked sleep out of his eyes. Standing in front of him, her whole body wiggling with excitement, was his granddaughter, Haru.

He laughed and sat up. "Goodness, little missy, aren't you excited!"

Wow, Haru not being a bitter pill for once. It sure has been a while since we've seen that in the story. o<o

"We're getting ready to head to the square, Catkin. Are you coming with us?"

Catkin turned his head. Saku, his daughter in-law, stood in the doorway, a tired smile on her face.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Catkin replied, stretching the stiffness out of his joints. "Chipper' already gone?"

"He took the cart with the show furniture down already," Saku said over her shoulder as she disappeared into the hall. "We'll meet him there. Now come on, Haru. Let's get ready."

That actually makes me wonder how much of Chipper and family's income comes from festivals like these. On one level, you'd think furniture would be a bit hard to lug around as a casual purchase, but festivals/holidays in general tend to be good for business for just about any business IRL.

Haru let out an excited squeal, jumping up and down with her eyes shining. Then she scrambled off into the other room.

Catkin let out an affectionate chuckle, exchanging a glance with Saku. "Well, we shouldn't keep her waiting. Let's get going."

I can't get over how adorable Haru used to be back in the day. There's something really charming about seeing how bright-eyed and optimistic she used to be once upon a time, which is a bit
:sadwott~2:
knowing where she'll wind up.

Nearly the entire village had come to the square for the festivities. More pokemon had come from nearby villages, and there were even a few wildeners that had come out of the surrounding woods, lured in both by their beliefs in the Titans and the promise of food. Though, Catkin noticed with a frown, there were even less wildeners around than usual this year. He hoped everything was alright.

But there was no point in worrying about that. No, right now, he should enjoy his time with his family.

:copyka2:


Ah yes, the hints that there were already things seriously wrong with Theran Village and things were deteriorating even this far back. Though let's get real, the wildeners were totally there for the food.
:bleplithe:


"Grandpa! Look what I can do!" Haru waved a paw until he turned to watch. Then she stuffed an entire oran pastry into her mouth.

He laughed as she gave him a wide grin, crumbs sticking to her snout. "Goodness, you're getting so big, little miss. Such a big appetite!"

Somehow, I doubt that Haru would give Toshi a pass for doing that in the present day. Though it's a cute mental image there. ^^

As Haru reached a grabby paw for another pastry, a familiar voice caught Catkin's attention.

"Fancy some wine, Catkin?"

The bibarel turned his head, locking eyes with an approaching roserade. His vines were wrapped around various bowls and cups, each filled with indigo oran wine.

Now I'm curious how this wine tastes, but you can't say it's not effective marketing since Theran Village's festival seems like a fun place to be around. ^^

"Don't mind if I do, Hyacinth." As the roserade maneuvered his carried drinks around to sit a bowl down, Catkin continued. "You've really outdone yourself this year. The harvest has been bountiful! And plenty tasty too. Wouldn't you say, Haru?"

Haru looked up with wide eyes, face stuffed with yet another pasty. "Mm!"

I mean, I don't know if Haru would give the same answer if she had some of that wine versus her sugar-packed pastry, since alcohol is very much an acquired taste like caffeine.
:loltias:


Hyacinth laughed. "Well, I've certainly had plenty of help. Roselei is shaping up to be a fine farmer. A few more years and I think I'll be able to retire!"

"Indeed. Gigas bless you." Catkin turned away and leaned down, lapping up a couple mouthfuls of the wine. He closed his eyes, savoring the taste as it washed over his tongue. But as he opened his eyes again, he noticed Haru leaning forward to sniff at his drink. Then, before he could do anything, she took an experimental drink, only gag and recoil.

"Gross! Grandpa, why are you drinking that?"

Oh right, I forgot that Haru actually gets a crash course in how alcohol is an acquired taste.
:hoodLUL:


He pulled the bowl away and held it above his head. "It's old people drink, Haru," he explained, holding back laughter. She was so cute when she got upset like this. "You'll understand when you're older."

In response, Haru glared. "Don't laugh!"

Too late. :V

Though that makes me wonder if we're ever going to see Haru hit up the bar in the normal narrative, since she was thinking about it in the last chapter I read.

"Sorry, sorry." He chuckled a couple more times, then got over the bout. "Alright, why don't we find something else to do. Do you want to go watch fighting games?"

Haru immediately perked up, all her grumpiness forgotten. "Okay! Race you!" And just like that, she'd turned and bolted away from the table.

Ah yes, the reminder that we're dealing with a society of Pokémon here. But it makes sense that Pokémon would have sparring and watching others spar high up there on their shortlist of things to do for fun.

The field where the guards usually ran drills had been divided up into a handful of sections, rope with flags surrounding the area. A dozen or so pokemon milled about in the field, while several more watched from the sidelines. Several events were planned for the day: racing, climbing, swimming, and other ways for pokemon to show off their skills. And then, when the sun was setting, a tournament of battles.

Ah, so no Protect barrier antics to cut down on property damage in this setting. Though I suppose that even if PWCH had that, that Theran's a little short-staffed to keep such Pokémon around.

The main event wouldn't start until after the blessing ceremony, but there were still pokemon around competing in other events. Or even just getting ready. At the center of the field…

Bolts of electricity danced wildly across the field. From the epicenter came the boisterous laughter of a massive luxray. "Come now, Whisper. Is that the best you've got?"

Only the grass waved in response. The luxray growled playfully, lowering himself into a crouch as he tasted the air.

Ohai, Volt.

Catkin felt tiny paws dig into his shoulders. Haru had climbed up to get a better look.

A flash of red darted from the tall grass, racing towards the luxray. His ears twitched, then he turned to face the attacking hawlucha. She slammed into him at full speed, sending them tumbling in a tangle of limbs. But the luxray was prepared. He twisted around to get a better grip and bit down on the hawlucha's wing. Ice crept up her feathers, and she flinched as she tried to pull free, but to no avail.

"I yield, I yield!" Whisper cried out.

Oh, so Volt used to be Whisper's senior back in life. That would explain a few things about that scene where she was torn up over his absence.

Immediately, the luxray let go, allowing his opponent to stumble away. A purr rumbled in his throat as the hawlucha dusted herself off.

"Well done, Volt, Whisper!" Catkin called out. Similar cheers went up around them.

Whisper froze at the calls, shying behind Volt. Her feathers puffed up, and yet she tried to make herself look small.

Oh, this was not long after when Whisper ran off from whatever business she left behind with the Enforcers, huh? Since she sure seems shy and withdrawn there in a way that I wouldn't have expected from someone familiar with the others in the village.

Still not used to the attention of living in a village, Catkin thought to himself. Ah well, it will come with time.

"It's okay." Volt's voice rumbled with reassurance. "Everyone thinks you did great. He stepped aside, giving Whisper a light headbutt to urge her forward. "Now run along and rest up. We've got a ceremony to attend before the matches start properly."

Yuuuuuup. Not sure how I forgot about that detail, though one of these days, you ought to whip up a formal chronology of some sort, since it'd be interesting to see how various watersheds in your characters' lives overlap with one another time-wise.

"We should head towards the temple, too," Catkin said with a nod. "Come along, Haru."

"Aww, but I wanted to stay and watch," Haru whined. Even so, she slid down his back and tumbled down his tail. But then she shook the dust out of her fur, and she was back to her chipper self, scampering off again.

Catkin chuckled and followed slowly behind.

Ah yes, Haru being her irreverent self towards the gods even as a kid. Even if I gathered that she hasn't become a misotheist just yet.

Not too much later, Catkin had settled down with Haru a short ways from the temple, along with most of the other villagers. The young bidoof squirmed in place as he kept a firm paw on her, making sure she didn't run off before the blessing started.

Five pokemon stood in front of the temple entrance, surrounded by baskets upon baskets of berries and vegetables. There was Kari – the graying lucario that tended to the temple – and his riolu son, Anu. Standing on either side of them were an absol and a gardevoir.

Catkin leaned down to whisper in Haru's ear. "You see those two?" He pointed at the absol. "That's Cass, the town oracle. She watches and listens for signs of trouble from Regigigas so that we can prepare. And that—'' he gestured to the gardevoir "— is our mayor, Lady Gratitude."

He scanned the crowd. Her mate, Jhorlo, was nowhere to be seen. Probably running about trying to make sure everything was perfect, if Catkin knew him. He could, however, see Cass' daughter, Muse, sitting just to the side. The tiny absol was sitting stiffly, watching with a comically serious expression.

Well, something like that, anyways. Though I kinda wonder if this paragraph ought to have been broken in two, since the parts before and after "He scanned [...]" read as pretty thematically distinct to me.

And ah yes, it's a grand on-screen gathering of the doomed party that died off trying to find Regigigas. Like this is at once really cute and really
:copyka2:
when you read it with the story's subtext and knowing where things go from here in mind.

Gratitude raised her hand bringing all chatter to a close. All eyes turned toward the temple.

"Good afternoon, everyone," she began in a cheerful tone, clasping her hands together. "Thank you all for coming out to celebrate another successful harvest. I hope you've been enjoying the food. Everyone give cheer for Hyacinth, Meaad, and their families for growing and preparing all the food for today."

A collection of cheers, clapping, and stomping of feet went up among the crowd. Gratitude waited for the cheering to subside before continuing.

Another cute / fitting reminder that we're in a Pokémon society here. Since yeah, I'd imagine that that's a pretty fitting surrogate for clapping among quadrupeds in general.

"As you know, we have many more activities for the day, including the fighting games. But for now, let me step aside, so that Kari can say the blessing."

More cheers as she took a step back and the lucario took a step forward. Anu stepped up beside him, but remained quiet. It seemed like Kari was teaching him the motions of the blessing. Perhaps he was planning on retiring soon?

I actually don't remember if Kari was part of the doomed expedition or not, but either way, it's a bit sad that the implication that Kari just flatly isn't alive anymore in the present day. So he definitely "retired", alright.

"Great Regigigas, Titan of the Mountain," Kari began, placing one paw to his chest spike while raising the other in the air. "Thank you, as always for the bountiful harvest. We've worked hard in your stead, growing this food. We offer a portion of it back to the mountain, for providing for us. In return, Continent Tower, we humbly ask that you provide us with a bountiful harvest next cycle." He closed his eyes and bowed his head, and many of the other pokemon did the same.

Oh hey, I recognize that epithet.
:eltystarry:


Though it's a cute scene, and would be one that would be fun to see a depiction of one day.

But before Catkin could do so, he caught an uneasy glance pass between Cass and Gratitude behind Kari's back. Discomfort churned in his stomach as he closed his eyes as well. What was that about? Had the absol received a bad omen? Should he be worried?

Not right now, he decided after a moment. Whatever it is, it can wait. Now is a time for celebration.

And as they all opened their eyes, everyone did celebrate late into the night. And for the moment, all was good.

Small typo there. Though right, this is the part where the bonus wrapped right around to
:copyka2:
and
:sadwott~2:
since anyone who's read PWCH up to this point knows exactly what Cass saw there and how these happy days won't last for too much longer after this point chronologically.

Alright, and since that was a wee bit short, jumping right into the next Bonus as well:

Bonus 3

"Nip! Pay attention!"

Small golden pebbles smacked Nip across the cheek. He yelped, rubbing a paw against the stinging spot as the snickers of his denmates rose up around him. His attacker, a grey-pelted persian, stalked into his line of sight, her expression disgruntled.

"S-sorry," he mumbled, lowering his head submissively. "What did you need, Lorekeeper Glimmer?"

... Oh, so that's what Nip's old job was. Or at least I'm pretty sure that that's what this is building up to.

Also, I can already tell that even before Umbra, that life in Nip's neck of the woods got draining fast.

The persian, Glimmer, sighed and flicked her tail in agitation before using it to point to a drawing on the cave wall. "I asked you to explain the legend this image is depicting."

Nip stared in the dim light. The painting showed Celebi approaching the great Yveltal with head bowed.

"This is… the story of Celebi asking for Yveltal's allegiance? Asking for help?"

... Oh, so that's how Nip knew what Celebi was. You've definitely got my attention here, since it'll be interesting to see what the legendary mythos Nip grew up with was like.

"Close," Glimmer said. "But why is Celebi asking for help?"

"To… request aid in the war against Palkia?" Nip guessed, his voice clearly hesitant.

:copyber:


I can already tell that that war between the Timespace Dragons was quite something if it also sucked in a boatload of other Legendaries on opposing sides.

Glimmer sighed. "Again, only a partial answer. This is why you need to pay attention, Nip, especially if you are to be a lorekeeper." With a snort, she turned to look at the art. "This painting is the moment that Celebi came with the message that a battle would come to Yveltal's nesting grounds, whether she wanted to participate or not. He asked that Yveltal provide aid — both through getting her followers to fight, and through enlisting the aid of the spirits of the dead."

Oh, so that is what Nip's job used to be, or at least for a period of time.

And "enlisting the aid of the spirits of the dead", huh? Not sure what that would wind up entailing, but it definitely feels thematically on-brand for Yveltal.

"Oh! I know what happened next!" chimed a stunky to Nip's right. "Yveltal refused to provide her powers, saying that it was wrong to use the spirits of the departed for battle. But that she was willing to speak with her followers, and battle alongside them, if they chose to side with Dialga."

"Very good, Holly," Glimmer purred. "At least someone is paying attention."

... Wait, assuming it was even possible, what would've happened if Yveltal actually used those dead spirits for battle? Since if Yveltal found it wrong, that implies that something bad would've happened if it happened.
:fearfullaugh~1:


Nip's fur grew hot with embarrassment and resentment. It wasn't that he didn't want to learn, he just didn't want to be forced into the path of a lorekeeper. It wasn't fair. Just because he was undersized, didn't mean he couldn't hunt and fight as well as everyone else.

I dunno, man. You kinda wind up getting owned by a Bidoof and her band of merry munchkins a few years after this point, so... :V

"I think that's enough for today," Glimmer said, shaking Nip out of his thoughts. "We'll continue after the group lesson, tomorrow."

Nip waited for the other students to get up before scampering out of the cave. He squinted as he emerged into midday light. The main clearing, a common area where most of the tribe gathered during rest times, was relatively empty.

I'm actually a little surprised given how Death From Above is a nontrivial issue for their young, that Nip's tribe wouldn't find something like a wisteria arbor more soothing as a backdrop for their gathering places assuming they had the craftsmanship to make it. Since it'd provide cover over their gathering place and be packed full of pretty flowers during the right time of year.

Ten or so pokemon milled about in small groups, most of them still at the training age. Several were gathered just outside a den surrounding Umbra, a mawile training to specialize in fighting, as she recounted a story from the day's sparring matches. She glanced his way, and he quickly averted his gaze, uninterested in getting involved with her group.

Nip: "Yeesh, hopefully I'll never have to get assigned to den with her. I can already tell she'd be a terrible roommate." >_>;

"Hey, Nip."

A shy voice caught his attention. Turning his head, he saw Holly sidle up to him. She gave a cheerful chirp once she had caught his attention. "I was wondering if you might want to spend recreation time with me?"

:copyka:


Oh, so Nip had someone he had feelings for before his tribe shacked him up with Umbra. That's... definitely something.

It was a kind offer. Holly always seemed willing to spend time with him – more so than many of his other peers. Nip replied with a slow blink, bringing his claws together. "Maybe another time. I sort of… Already had something planned."

Holly tilted her head. "Off with Tempest again?"

Nip's heart skipped a beat. "How did you hear about that?" No one was supposed to know about those meetings.

... Nip, what on earth are you up to with him for your meetings to be so cloak and dagger?
:fearfullaugh~1:


She sat down. "I saw you leave the other day. When you came back, you smelled like you'd been around him."

"O-oh," Nip stammered. "I-it's nothing special. He's just… been giving me some extra hunting practice." He hesitated. "Don't tell anyone, please? I don't want others to get the idea that I'm a bad hunter."

Holly is going to wind up telling someone, isn't she?

"Alright," Holly replied, mimicking his slow blink. "I'll see you later, then."

With that, she trotted away to catch up with another of their peers, a skittish mewoth.

Nip let out a sigh. He felt bad, brushing her off, but his training with Tempest was more important. Speaking of which, he was going to be late if he didn't get moving.

Oh, so we're going to see Nip red in tooth and claw this bonus, huh?

The sun had just passed its apex when Nip reached the glade he usually met Tempest in. A thin layer of snow crunched under paw. The soft drip-dripping of snowmelt surrounded him, signaling the end of the cold season.

Nice environmental detail there. And I like the implication that the seasons in Nip's neck of the woods are so icy that they specifically parse there being a cold season as opposed to stuff like discrete autumns and winters. Or at least, I think that's the implication.

Sitting in the center, lit by a sunbeam was the familiar ninetales. Frost shimmered around his waving tales as he watched Nip approach quietly.

"Greetings," Tempest said, not moving even as Nip approached. "I trust your daily training went well?"

"As well as it could," Nip said with a twitch of his tail feathers. Mostly lorekeeping, as usual." His voice dropped to a grumble. "It's fine and all but I'm sick of being treated like a kit."

13 words spoken- well, not seconds from disaster, but I'm pretty sure that Nip was kicking himself over this train of thought not long after this Bonus chapter.

"Knowing the tribe's history is important," Tempest pointed out. "And the legends, too. I do understand your frustrations, though." He stood up, tails fanning out, before dropping into a crouch. "But that's why you are here, is it not? Attack me."

Nip: "Um... Tempest, are you sure you want me to-?"
:wtfuckle:

Tempest: "Nip, we're Pokémon. I'll live, besides, I'm pretty sure that this is supposed to be something you've done a lot in the past."

To the point, as Tempest often was at the beginning of their training sessions. Nip took a deep breath, then sprang back and forth from foot to foot, dancing around Tempest as he looked for an opening. The ninetales regarded him with a quiet, guarded expression, giving nothing away.

Nip feinted to the right, then dashed forward so quickly that Tempest didn't have time to track his movement. Icy shards formed on his legs as he flash-froze the air around him, and he leaped to strike at Tempest's head with spinning kicks. The first landed perfectly, but the second only grazed him, and the third missed entirely.

"Your form is good," Tempest grunted, knocking him back by forming an icy wind, "but your accuracy could use some work. Now, again."

Huh, maybe we won't see Nip red in tooth and claw. Though I wonder if Nip would've obsessed this much about getting good at fighting if he could see where it'd lead him in the future. Since I'm pretty sure that something about this wound up putting him on track to being paired with Umbra.

They continued to train for some time, until, exhausted, the two of them collapsed in a heap. They rested for a while in each other's company, grooming and discussing recent events.

"You heard the announcement yesterday, right?" Nip asked, pausing between licks on his shoulder. "About the trials?"

How should I be envisioning these trials again? Are they like the ones from Gen 7 in structure? Or something very different from that?

"That they'd be starting soon?" Tempest asked. "Yes, I did. I figured that was why you were so eager to train."

Nip hummed in response. "I just… I don't want to be stuck as a lorekeeper, just because of my size. Because of my origins, you know?"

Image


Okay, you've definitely piqued my interest. Let's see what comes up on this topic.

He felt Tempest tense beside him. "Yes, I understand very well," Tempest replied, though his voice was strained.

Nip's brow furrowed. What about his statement made Tempest stressed? He supposed it was because Tempest was an outsider, like him. Tempest had joined the tribe as a grown pokemon, and had to prove himself trustworthy. Nip had been born in the tribe, but his egg had been taken from elsewhere. He knew it to be true, because there were no other of his kind in the tribe. There had been an elderly weavile when he was a kit, but he had passed, and everyone said he had no heirs.

Image


I don't recall if it's been explicitly brought up in the story yet, or just in writer's commentaries, but I'm pretty sure that this is pointing towards Nip's egg being taken off wildeners / a rival tribe and raised as their own. Since I'm pretty sure that has been mentioned somewhere before as being a known practice up north, and boy does it add some undertones to Nip's eventual falling out with his tribe. .-.

"But I'm sure you'll do fine," Tempest finally said, giving a quick nuzzle. "What is this training for after all?"

He was right. All this training would do him good in the trials. If he did well in the hunting and fighting assessments, he'd be able to become a primary hunter or guard, like he wanted.

This... is absolutely what got him shacked up with Umbra by the tribe's elders, isn't it? Or at least the effects of these secret training sessions was, I presume.

Letting out a frosty puff of air, Nip twitched his ear and glanced towards the setting sun, just dipping behind the trees. "I suppose we should get back. We can hunt along the way. I imagine you don't want to return empty-jawed."

Tempest grunted in response. He stood, stretched, then shook out his fur. "Indeed. Come on, we can hunt together."

Nip stood up as well. Together, they pushed into the undergrowth, both hopeful for the future.

:copyka:


Yeah, about that, you two...

Though I suppose that's as good a note as any to leave things on, so I'll jump right into the final summary:

I liked these chapters, they're cute but also very
:ohnowen:
when you realize that the happy moments that are depicted in them are basically a prelude to them falling apart offscreen in fairly short order. Gives them both a bittersweet vibe overall, and I kinda wonder if you wound up developing one after getting the idea for the other, since the two feel kinda like echoes to each other: one showing the happier days from Haru's earlier life, and one doing the same with Nip and his (relatively) happier days. There was a surprising amount of worldbuilding crammed into about 3000 words, so color me impressed, especially with the depiction of the Titan's Harvest festival, which felt pretty lively for such a short piece.

As for stuff I wasn't as fond of... honestly, my only real complaint is that I wish that there was more to these Bonus chapters, since the snapshots of the past they provide are honestly really interesting to see, and I hope it's not the last that we see of some of these characters from bygone times. That said, I understand that there were explicit length limitations for these Bonus chapters, so I won't begrudge it too much.

But altogether, great work @windskull . You've certainly got me looking forward to what comes next in PWCH, since these aside glimpses were already quite engrossing. ^^
 
Last edited:

Virgil134

PMD Writer
Partners
  1. sylveon
  2. weavile
  3. kommo-o
  4. noivern
  5. mothim
Bonus 3

Nip's fur grew hot with embarrassment and resentment. It wasn't that he didn't want to learn, he just didn't want to be forced into the path of a lorekeeper. It wasn't fair. Just because he was undersized, didn't mean he couldn't hunt and fight as well as everyone else.

You know, despite what Nip eventually ends up doing, I can’t help but feel bad for him here. Being forced into a job he doesn’t like just because of his size. Especially since it’s not like he’s a super terrible fighter or anything. Even if I can think of a certain Cubone who’d heavily protest at the idea of looking down at the tribe’s lorekeeper.

"I was wondering if you might want to spend recreation time with me?"

It was a kind offer. Holly always seemed willing to spend time with him – more so than many of his other peers. Nip replied with a slow blink, bringing his claws together. "Maybe another time. I sort of… Already had something planned."

I wonder if Nip in the present wishes he wouldn’t have said no and spent more time with her.

Nip feinted to the right, then dashed forward so quickly that Tempest didn't have time to track his movement. Icy shards formed on his legs as he flash-froze the air around him, and he leaped to strike at Tempest's head with spinning kicks. The first landed perfectly, but the second only grazed him, and the third missed entirely.

Huh, surprised to see a younger Nip use Triple Axel since it doesn’t like he knows the move in the present day.

Nip had been born in the tribe, but his egg had been taken from elsewhere.

I’m very curious about this. Can’t wait to see this get explored in the main story and find out more Nip’s true family.

Anyway, this was a cute bonus! I’m really glad Negrek requested this as her Blacklight drabble, since it was really interesting to have a small look into Nip’s life when he was still with his tribe.

Chapter 20

"I'll… let me do it myself," Haru said, backing away until her rump bumped against the door. If she let Susana do it, there was a chance that she would use her illusions to make it look like she was unlocking it. If Susana was talented enough, she could still trick Haru into thinking the door was unlocked anyway. But that was less likely. And even so, doing it herself made her feel safer.

Someone is a bit paranoid. (By the way, I absolutely love the artwork for this chapter! Adam did a good job there.)

That information was for her village and her village alone.

Now why do I have a feeling this won’t be the case for long?

questionsl.

Small typo.

"O-oh, I guess this fad hasn't reached you guys out in the boonies yet. It's called 'shaking paws.' It's kind of like… a physical promise for a verbal agreement."

You know, it’s funny. Throughout the story Haru’s given Nip a lot of shit about not acting civilized, yet when interacting with Susana and her team Haru seems like the wildener in comparison. Finding human customs strange and several times almost falling back on her instincts as if dealing with a predator instead of just a fellow Pokémon.

So entrenched in her thoughts, she didn't notice the pokemon watching her as she left.

Think this part could have used some additional description. At the moment it’s not clear who is watching her. Is it one random Pokémon standing in the hallway? Is it referring to several Pokémon who are going about their day in the hostel? Is it Susana and her party? The description is kinda vague.

He slid a small metal object across the counter, placing it in front of Vale. "One of you is dexterous, so I'll leave you to go to your room. Upstairs, last door on the left. Vale, if you happen to leave last, just come get me or the night staff We'll get the door locked for you

Love little worldbuilding details like these.

Gave it an experimental lick

And this is how diseases spread.

But she wasn't the only one that changed. One second, Umbra was looking at a perfectly normal charizard. The next, the two horns morphed into one. The girafarig's backside grew in size and became a dark mirror of its upper body. One side stared wide-eyed at the zoroark, the other glared at Vale

But the raichu's transformation was the most significant. Its fur turned dark orange, its ears shifting back. Horns grew from his head, and spikes appeared along his back. Umbra gaped at the raichu-like creature with undisguised shock.

Oh, huh! I definitely was not expecting that. Now the question is why these Pokémon are mutated. Is there something turning Pokémon into this? Or were these Pokémon perhaps born like this and is there a population somewhere suffering from deformities?

We're not explorers. We're an advance team for a group that sailed in from offshore. We made landfall a few months — moons — ago.

Ah, I knew these guys were with the group from across the sea!

"Wait. I have an idea. Clearly you four have something you're still hiding. Perhaps we can… come to an agreement."

Umbra channeling her inner villain This is totally gonna backfire for her, isn’t it?

"You know I can hear everything you're saying, right?" Susana interjected.

Lmao

The false raichu was less restrained. "You're sick!" he shouted, sparks flying from his cheek-sacs.

False Raichu or not, he’s not wrong.

Aaaaand know I just can’t help but think of Theran Village as one of those creepy little villages where travelers passing through sometimes go “missing”. O.O;;

"Then do we have a deal?"

Susana bobbed her head. "I believe we do."

Whelp, I can already tell this is gonna be interesting. But yeah, good chapter! Really enjoyed this one and makes me excited to see how things will continue from here.
 

Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Alright, let's get right back into the normal flow of your story, hm? Picking up right where I left off with…

Chapter 20

Also, nice commish from Adam there.

"Finding the gods?" Haru stood stiff, staring, flabbergasted at the strange zoroark in front of her. Her mouth hung open as she tried to process Susana's claim. "You… you're…"

Susana: "Look, I know it sounds crazy, buuuut..."
:wellyousee:


"A zoroark, yes," Susana interrupted with a chuckle. "Once again, sorry for deceiving you. My appearance is rather frightening, isn't it?" She raised a forepaw to rub at her wild, disheveled mane. "Our job requires some degree of secrecy so I usually keep my true form hidden. Not everyone is as friendly as you, Haru."

Haru: "No, I was talking more about the 'finding the gods' part. You can't actually believe they exist... right?" >_>;
Susana: “Weren’t there reports of Celebi appearing going around here?”
Haru: “... That doesn’t count.”

She began to approach, and Haru took stumbling steps backwards on instinct. Susana's posture was nonthreatening, but the prey part of Haru's mind didn't like the idea of a large, strange pokemon approaching her. Especially when there was no escape route. But she forced herself to stop and held her ground. "I-I… I'm not as friendly as you think. Come any closer and you'll see how much damage these teeth can do."

This feels supremely ill-advised since Susana gives me strong vibes of having knocked off peasant girls much like Haru who found out too much.

Haru: "Stars, I knew I should've insisted that we meet at the bar downstairs." o.o

The zoroark didn't seem swayed by Haru's trembling threat, but she did stop, chuffing as if she'd heard a joke.

"Goodness, I'm sorry if I've come across as threatening, Haru. Look, maybe I can make it up to you, make it clear we mean no harm. Are you hungry? Thirsty? We have carrots and bread in the way of herbivore food. We also have razzberry juice and wine."

Haru: "... Okay, seriously, what is your deal here?"
:absus:

Susana: "I want to make a good-natured offer and am trying to get you comfortable? Nothing wrong with that, is there?"
:gardeshrug~1:


Haru still felt an edge of hunger. But her stomach was too twisted to even think about eating right now. "I'm fine."

Susana:
:heliodoubt:

Haru: "I am, okay?! Look, if you'll just open the door, we can all pretend we never saw each other!" O_O;

Susana dropped her paws to her sides and shrugged. "Suit yourself. But really, please make yourself comfortable. You can stay right there if it makes you feel safer. Just let me come by so I can unlock the small door for you. That way you can leave at any time." She took a step forward. "As you can see, none of us need it, so there was no need to unlock it."

Oh, so they left that unlocked the entire time, huh? A bold move, though I suppose that it's better off for Susana and the gang to use plausible deniability if recruitment went south over reflexively turning to murder as a solution.

"I'll… let me do it myself," Haru said, backing away until her rump bumped against the door. If she let Susana do it, there was a chance that she would use her illusions to make it look like she was unlocking it. If Susana was talented enough, she could still trick Haru into thinking the door was unlocked anyway. But that was less likely. And even so, doing it herself made her feel safer.

Well that's some prime paranoia fuel there.

No one stopped her from unlocking the door, assuaging her fears somewhat. She turned back and crouched so that she was more comfortable, but still able to turn and flee at a moment's notice.

Susana returned to her spot by the map and took a seat, brushing her claws through her mane. "Now that that's settled, where should I start…"

Haru: "Maybe start off by what you're hoping to accomplish by looking for gods?" >_>;
Susana: "Well..."

"Maybe at the beginning," Haru said bluntly. "Who are you, really?"

"Oh, everything I've said so far is true." Susana stopped brushing her mane and tilted her head at Haru, ears flicking up. "We're explorers from the Expedition Society, on a mission to find out more information about both mystery dungeons and the gods. The only thing I lied about is my identity." She paused. "Well, I know we only told a partial truth before inviting you here, but there's a reason for that!"

Image


Yeah, I don't believe that at all right now.

Haru considered for a moment. "So why are you so secretive about it? I'm sure a lot of pokemon would be excited to go chasing legendaries."

"Isn't it obvious?" the raichu, Topaz, said. "Think about it. Most pokemon fear the discovery of their gods. They might say they want to find them, but they're lying to themselves. What if the gods don't live up to their expectations? What if the stories are lies? What if they don't exist at all?"

Haru: "(Uhh... funny story about that, actually.)" ^^;

Skorch, the charizard, spoke next. "There's hundreds of stories about various gods, but we have very little hard evidence. The theory that Dialga and Palkia formed the dungeons during the historic War of the Ancients is well accepted, but even that isn't completely proven. But no one questions it, because few pokemon are ready to face the possibility that the gods aren't real. Or that, if they are, they don't really care."

All of this came from some really dumb meme reason between those two, didn't it? :V

Haru snorted, thinking both of her earlier conversation with Nip and the way everyone had been acting since Celebi's appearance. "You got that right."

Susana: "Oh? You said that as if you had personal experience."
Haru: "No! No! It was just a hypothetical!"
:blazisweat~1:


Topaz, who had splayed out on his belly and begun tracing shapes in the floor with his tail tip, cast a glance at Remer before discerningly looking at Haru. "The way you said that makes me feel like there's something you aren't telling us."

Haru: "Oh. Uh... hey, I hear my parents' log flume clogging up! I'll just see myself out-!"
Susana: "Haru. We're not going to bring you any harm. Now seriously, out with it." >:|

Haru's gaze darted to the side as she tried to find a way to salvage her comment. As much as she wanted to expose Celebi for the fraud he was, something held her back. That information was for her village and her village alone. "All I mean is that there's some pokemon out there that freak out when their faith is challenged. That's all."

Just like how you will within like 5 chapters of this point, I'm pretty sure.

Topaz exchanged another look with Remer. Haru's heart pounded, threatening to burst through her chest as the silence drew on. It was Skorch that finally spoke.

"Makes enough sense, don't you guys think?"

Haru: "Yeah, yeah, exactly... say, uh... can I go right now-?"
:sweats:

Skorch: "Easy there, kid. I wasn't done just yet."

Susana bobbed her head. "Agreed." Then she turned back to Haru. "Well, now you know why we're trying to get to the shrine. But, as you saw back in front of the temple, we haven't had much luck getting anyone to take us." She sighed, slowly slinking back to her map. She traced a line across it with one claw before looking up again.

"You said you've been there before." Her tone was leading. "Is there… any chance you could take us? Maybe even a bit further up the mountain, if time permits? I know it's a big ask, but you'd be doing us a big service. And we'd be happy to pay you for your time."

Haru:
Image

Susana: "... Really, Haru?"
:AlviseUnamused:


"E-excuse me?" Haru's mouth hung open as she tried to process the request. They wanted her to take them to the shrine. No, not just to the shrine, but up the mountain. They couldn't be serious.

Susana tilted her head, her ears flicking back and forth. "Goodness, what's the matter?"

Haru: "Look, even if I knew how to take you there, I'd never do it in a million years because of- ... personal reasons."
:grohno~1:

Susana: "And those would be...?"

It took several moments before she finally found her words. "Do… Do you realize how dangerous it is to go up there? No one goes up there anymore." Well, that wasn't totally true. Anu went up there every few cycles with a couple other guards, and there were probably wildeners that visited the shrine to pay respects, since most weren't comfortable entering the village to visit the temple itself; she couldn't remember the last time any had shown up for any of the religious festivals. But she wasn't about to say that out loud.

I like how for how much of a skeptic Haru is about religion, she's just never questioned why that was happening in spite of remembering times earlier in life when wildeners would visit Theran Village.

"You're likely to encounter territorial wildeners along the way," she continued, stamping a paw. "And don't get me started about the dangers beyond the shrine. My understanding is there's no real path up the mountain past the shrine. And you have to deal with chilling winds, large crevices, and — if you get high enough — snow and freezing temperatures. Pokemon have died trying to scale it." Her mind drifted to falling snow. A younger Muse's wails rang in her ears. Then she shook her body and forced the thoughts away.

That second-to-last sentence...
:sadwott~2:


Susana: "Haru, it's our job to be able to operate in dangerous environments. Though aren't you being a bit dramatic there?" o_ó
Haru: "Lady, I wish I was being dramatic about the 'Pokémon dying trying to scale it' part." ._.

Remer exchanged a look with Skorch before saying, "I understand your hesitations, young one. But you would be in good paws. We are well experienced with exploring dangerous locations."

Image


"If she's never been past the shrine, then she wouldn't be able to guide us any further, would she?" Skorch interjected, addressing the girafarig. "I don't see the use in asking that of her."

Image


Through the discussion, Susana remained quiet, her eyes closed.

Haru turned away and took a step towards the door. "Sorry, but my answer is no. I sympathize with your cause. Really, I do. But I can't justify risking my life for it."

Wow, that was definitely fast of Haru. Not even going to stop and ask what the catch is to all of this, huh?

Susana sighed. "I understand. Thank you for your time, Haru." Then she turned back to her team. "Come on, we best hit the streets again. I'm sure we can find someone in this village willing to take us."

Some disgruntled wildener is ultimately going to do the honors or something like that, huh?

Haru paused, about to unlatch the small door. "…I thought you were talking about looking outside the village for help before."

"Well, we're considering it," Susana admitted. "If we can't find anyone willing to help here, then we'll have to head out. But we'd prefer to work with civilized 'mon. You know how difficult it can be to work with wildeners, pokemon still beholden to their instincts, right?"

I mean, considering how Haru messed up that one Fletchinder's leg over a Wonder Orb, I'm not fully convinced townies in this setting aren't still beholden to their instincts in some capacity. ^^;

Haru lowered her paw and turned around, thoughts racing through her head as she made mental connections. All the while that dull headache from before persisted. If these explorers went asking around the village, they were bound to come across Toshi sooner or later. And he wouldn't hesitate to answer an exploration team's request.

Haru:
:uhhh:


Her mind drifted to mental images of her dying grandfather, a pokemon who made it far into the mountains, only for his traveling companions to die. A pokemon who made it back home, only to succumb to his injuries shortly after. Suddenly it wasn't her grandfather lying in front of her, struggling for breath as he told the adults of his team's demise until his body gave out, and he was silenced forever. Now it was Toshi. Bleeding and small, his eyes glassy and staring at nothing.

She couldn't let that happen.

Oh, so that's how Haru has all those traumatic memories of Catkin. I didn't pick up on that being the implication, but that would explain a lot.

Heart racing, she took her paw away from the handle and turned back to Susana. "Fine. Fine. You make a good point. I'll help." Susana opened her mouth to say something, but Haru cut her off with a raised paw. "But only as far as the old shrine. And only under the condition that, if you do decide to go further, you escort me back to the village first. After that, you're on your own."

Image


Whelp, I'm sure that this is going to backfire horribly somehow, but I suppose we'll get there when we get there.

"That wouldn't be a problem." Susana brought her paws up and tapped her claws together, eyes closed in a friendly squint. "How soon could you go? Is tomorrow good? We've already stocked up on supplies — except food, but we can take care of that tonight."

Tomorrow? Haru tilted her head. "Why so soon?"

Remer answered as he climbed to his feet and approached the storage chest. "We have other leads we want to follow up on afterwards, but we have to return to our branch and report our findings soon."

Sticker, sceptilisk,


They absolutely have some deeper reason for being in a rush, don't they?

That's a reasonable explanation, Haru thought. She stared at him a moment longer before letting out a breath. "Alright. You have yourselves a deal."

Haru: "... (Why did I not just ghost these guys and just tell Toshi not to accept any requests from dodgy Rescue Teams for the next week?!)"
:grohno~1:

- Beat moment -
Haru: "(... Right, because he'd probably still have taken the job anyways.)" ._.;

Susana clapped twice and showed her teeth in what Haru thought was supposed to be a friendly expression. "Excellent! Where can we meet you tomorrow?"

Haru: "I-Is it too late to back out here?"
:fearfullaugh~1:

Susana:
Image


Haru looked to the ceiling, considering. There were a few places she could think of, but some would raise questions. "I think the best place is… There's a bridge crossing the river, not far outside of the village. The path to the shrine branches off of the road on the other side. That would be a good place to start."

Small typo there, and don't you want others to see you take off with this team, Haru? Since given how you don't fully trust them right now, for all you know they're a band of Outlaws who will just mug you the moment they get sufficiently far away from town. ^^;

Susana bobbed her head. "Cool. We'll meet you there just after sunrise so we can get a bright and early start. Anu said it's almost a day's journey away, and we'd like to get you back home in a reasonable amount of time." She held a paw out towards Haru, paw pad facing up.

Oh, so that's the moment the chapter art is depicting.

Haru stared at the paw. Susana had made this same strange gesture before. When the zoroark didn't move, she tilted her head. "What are you doing?"

Susana looked at Haru, then at her paw. "O-oh, I guess this fad hasn't reached you guys out in the boonies yet. It's called 'shaking paws.' It's kind of like… a physical promise for a verbal agreement."

Neat little bit of comparative culture there, even if I'm pretty sure that it's not the city where Susana and her team hail from.

"An agreement…" How strange. Still, she sat back and reached up to place her paw in the zoroark's. "Very well." They held paws for a moment, then Haru pulled away. "Now, if you'll excuse me."

She turned and reached up to push down on the handle, putting her weight against the door. As she made her way down the hall, her headache weakened to little more than a throb, and she began to think. She was going to have to tell her parents about this — at least, to some degree. They'd want to know why she was skipping work, after all.

So entrenched in her thoughts, she didn't notice the pokemon watching her as she left.

:fearfullaugh~1:


Yeah, I'm still convinced that Susana and her team are scouts for Zaid, since everything about them has been super sus.

"Hey, Meaad. I need a room for two. Should only need it for a couple hours."

The simisear raised a brow, looking Vale up and down, then glanced behind him to look at Umbra. She stared back with a flat expression. After a few heartbeats, he closed his eyes, raised his hands palm-up to either side, and turned away. "Room for two? Coming right up."

Vale: "... Could've done without the judging look there, really."
:AlviseUnamused:


Umbra continued watching him for a few more heartbeats before turning away to take in her surroundings. They were in another wooden building — one of the larger ones. On their side of the room, there was only the counter, a few plants, and an incline to a second floor. On the other side of the room, sat a pawful of matching furniture items. Chairs and tables, if she remembered the words correctly. Sunlight filtered through a handful of windows, creating patches of light throughout the room.

A couple pokemon sat at the tables, casting curious glances in her direction. She turned away and ignored them. Food scents wafted from their side of the room, and from an entryway beyond the tables. She could identify the smell of cooked meats and sickly sweet fruits. Her stomach growled, but she ignored that, too.

Vale: "Oh my gods, I can already tell I'm never going to hear the end of this."
:AlviseHurt:

Umbra: "I'd just like to remind you that this was your brilliant idea, so let's just get this over with." >.<

This room would be absolutely horrible if trouble showed up. There was the counter. Or perhaps under the tables, but they were too exposed for her liking. At least they made a makeshift weapon or shield, in a pinch.

I like how Umbra is sufficiently low-trust that she's already mentally mapping out what she'd need to do in the events of things going south in this meeting.

... Which is probably wise since Vale is already plotting to backstab his boss, and if someone's ready and willing to betray one party...

"Ah, here we are."

The simisear's voice brought her attention back. He slid a small metal object across the counter, placing it in front of Vale. "One of you is dexterous, so I'll leave you to go to your room. Upstairs, last door on the left. Vale, if you happen to leave last, just come get me or the night staff. We'll get the door locked for you. Either way, make sure to leave the key at the front when you're done." He glanced back to Umbra and smiled wryly. "Enjoy your time together."

Umbra:
200.gif

Vale: "Yeah, yeah, shut up, I'm the one who's going to have to live with all the rumors after you go back to your mud hole up north." >_>;

Umbra stepped forward and grabbed the key, casting one more unamused glance at Meaad. Then she turned and made her way towards the ramp. Vale followed just behind, trotting until they were side by side.

Umbra leaned towards him and muttered into his ear, "Remind me why this is the best place for our discussion?"

Vale: "Again, it's private and nobody's going to come up here wanting to hear Pokémon get it on in these rooms." >_<;
Umbra: "... I really hope the rooms next to ours aren't occupied right now."
:grohno~1:


Vale lowered his head and replied quietly. "Most places don't have the degree of privacy we need. I don't even trust my own home. And we can't go to the woods all the time or pokemon might get suspicious. Besides, the rumors that crop up from meeting here should provide some cover."

Umbra: "Wait, 'most places'?! You mean there were other places we could've met that wouldn't make everyone think that we're-?!"
:seviAAAAAAAAAAA:

Vale: "Umbra, shut up and get in the room." >_>;

Umbra clenched her jaw. Right, the gross rumors he'd mentioned before. As much as she hated to admit it, he had a point. "If we want those rumors to stick, then we need to look the part," she grumbled, suppressing a shudder; if she had to act, then she would. And she considered herself quite the actress.

Vale: "Oh dear gods, no. We're not doing that if at all possible."
:TailsEww:

Umbra: "Speaking my language, really. Let's just get this over with." >_>;

Glancing out of the corner of her eye, she made sure they were still being watched. Then she forced a smile, and — before he could protest — tilted her head up to nuzzle against Vale's lower jaw.

Ugh, how embarrassing. Thank Yveltal they were out of sight shortly after. At least that would get pokemon talking.

Vale: "U-Umbra?! Why would you-?!"
:AlviseShocked:

Umbra: "Look, do you want rumors about us as cover or not?"
:gardexhausted:


"Do not ever make me do that again," she said monotonously with a shake of her head.

"Hey, you're the one that chose to do it, don't look at me."

They said nothing more.

What a wonderful couple these two make together... /s

Halfway down the hall, a sound caught Umbra's attention. Muffled voices. One of them feminine and familiar.

She stopped. "Hold on. Does that not sound like the annoying bidoof?"

"Toshi?" Vale tilted his head. "No, but now that you mention it, it does sound sort of like Haru…"

Umbra: "The hell would she be doing here-?" O_ó;
Vale: "I really did not need that mental imagery in my mind, thanks."
:grohno~1:


Umbra strained her ears until she could figure out which room the sound was coming from. She approached, speaking. "Something strange is going on. Listen."

She leaned forward, pressing one ear against the door. Vale came up just behind and did similarly.

"You said you've been there before," an unfamiliar, low-toned feminine voice said. "Is there… any chance you could take us? Maybe even a bit further up the mountain, if time permits?"

Oh, so Vale and Umbra overheard the last scene. That's just... wonderful, really.

Umbra stole a glance at Vale. His eyes were narrow, and his lips drew back in the beginning of a silent snarl. They continued to listen for a few moments, long enough to hear Haru agree. Vale drew back and crept to the end of the hall, taking care to keep his claws from clicking against the wood. Umbra followed, smelling signs of an electrical current as she sidled up to him.

"Well?" she asked.

"This is suspicious," Vale growled. "I know that bidoof well enough to know she'd never go to the old shrine of her own free will." He looked back to the door and crouched, tail low and still. "I know we have matters to discuss, but I have a job to do. I need to deal with this first. We can make plans afterwards."

I can already tell that this is going to end terribly for Vale. Since I am not convinced at all that Susana and her team wouldn't just flatly kill him if he got in their way badly enough.

Umbra's claws twitched with frustration. This was a waste of her time. Nip was far more important than helping some pathetic little bidoof that got in over her head. Haru could get herself killed for all Umbra cared.

Well somebody's certainly going out of her way to zero out her audience sympathy right now.

But at the same time, she could understand the feeling of obligation. The need to fulfill a duty. She let out a long huff, turning away. "Fine, but make it quick."

Vale dipped his head in understanding and lifted a paw. But before he could take a step, the small door swung open and Haru waddled out. Umbra and Vale froze, watching as she headed down the ramp without even noticing them.

... Oh, so that's what the "Pokémon who were watching her as she left" line from the very end of the last scene meant. I at first thought that was Susana and her party, but that'd explain some things.

"Now what?" Umbra asked.

"Follow my lead." Vale approached the door with that same light step, as if sneaking up on prey. Then he raised a paw to scratch at the door.

That... takes on some fairly creepy undertones considering what Vale's "side gig" from his normal duties is.

All chatter and movement stopped on the other side. There was a shuffling, then the small door creaked open, and a charmander poked her head out the door.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

Vale stood at attention, looking down at the charmander. "Yes, actually. We're with the local law enforcement. We'd just like a quick word." He glanced the charmander up and down. Sizing her up, Umbra presumed. "May we step inside?"

Suli: "... I hate this town." >.<
Vale: "Is that a 'yes', or...?"
:AlviseUnamused:


The charmander's brow furrowed. "If you need to, I guess. Is there a problem?" She stepped back.

"Probably not," Vale replied as he stooped and ducked through the smaller door. He jerked his head to gesture for Umbra to follow. "Just following up on a concerned inquiry from the innkeep. Said he saw a townie come up here with you guys." He glanced to the map on the floor, then at the other pokemon. You're the explorers that were staying in town, right? Could I see your badge for a moment?"

Whelp, I sure hope that there's not a robust way of checking badge validity in this setting, since otherwise things are going to go very sideways very fast for one party or the other here.

The charmander tittered. "Are you talking about Haru? She left a few moments ago, actually. You just missed her. But here you go." She picked up the badge, messing around with it for a few heartbeats before tossing it in Vale's direction. It landed on the ground with a metallic clatter.

He looked down at the badge through narrowed eyes, inspecting the surface. He sniffed it. Gave it an experimental lick. Then gingerly picked it up with his teeth and flipped it over, repeating the process.

Suli: "... Was that really necessary?"
:TailsEww:

Vale:
Image


Umbra crossed her arms, gaze flicking between Vale and the other pokemon. Subtly, she lifted her jaw, parting it in an attempt to appear larger and intimidating.

"Hmm," Vale finally said, still stooping. "This is a genuine explorer badge, alright." He stood up straight. "There's just one thing that seems off to me." He looked between the other three pokemon. "Where's your other establishing member, Miss… what was your name again?"

"Suli," the charmander answered. "And you mean Chamomile, the treeko? She's back at base, handling paperwork."

I knew it. That badge really was lifted off of that team that got ganked in the Interlude.

"I see. If you're Suli, that makes you the team lead? You have a lot of evolved pokemon with you for only being a charmander with a silver rank." He knocked the badge skidding across the floor in Suli's direction.

Umbra had no idea what he was talking about, but she got the idea that something was fishy about their story. The way the raichu was fidgeting backed up her thoughts.

Suli: "... I'm a late evolver?" ^^;
Vale: "Yeah, no. Since when were there ever 'late evolver' Charmander?"
:AlviseUnamused:


Suli frowned and crossed her arms, tail flame flaring. "Does no one in this villiage know how to be hospitable? Seriously, do you treat all outsiders with this sort of disrespect?"

"Only ones that act suspicious," Umbra answered.

Oh, you're one to talk, Umbra. >:V

Vale bobbed his head in agreement. "Exactly. Now, if you really are who you say you are, you wouldn't mind coming down to the psychic courier to contact your branch and verify your identity, now would you?"

Suli et al: "..."
:uhhh:

Vale: "What's the matter? A little in-and-out got you so worried all of a sudden?"
:AlviseDetermined:


Umbra scanned the evolved pokemon again. The raichu was shifting uneasily again, while the charizard gave him a nervous glance. They weren't expecting to be challenged, she thought. They're lying about something, and they don't have an excuse ready.

Her attention shifted to the girafarig. Unlike the other two, he was staring at Vale with rapt attention and a serious expression. Such a serious expression, in fact, that it almost looked like…

He's gonna take a swing at Vale, isn't he?

The heartbeat it clicked in her head, she tackled Vale, sending him tumbling. A moment later, a foreign force sent her flying over him. She heard the wall splinter behind her, but it did not give.

Yuuuuuup, I figured as much.

The charmander dove for the chest, reaching for something inside. At the same time, Vale sprang back to his feet, a low growl in his throat. Umbra felt her fur stand on end heartbeats before bolts of electricity flew off of the manectric, striking everyone, including herself.

The charmander cried in pain and reeled back. And then, almost instantaneously, she was no longer a charmander, but a strange, pale-furred zoroark.

Umbra: "I'm sorry, but what the actual-"
Vale: "I knew there was something up with all of you!"
:AlviseAngry:


But she wasn't the only one that changed. One second, Umbra was looking at a perfectly normal charizard. The next, the two horns morphed into one. The girafarig's backside grew in size and became a dark mirror of its upper body. One side stared wide-eyed at the zoroark, the other glared at Vale.

Wow, that's some powerful illusion abilities there. So they're betamons, huh? Since those descriptions are consistent with that one beta DP sprite of female Charizard and with Beta Girafarig. Though this basically confirms that these guys are with Zaid.

But the raichu's transformation was the most significant. Its fur turned dark orange, its ears shifting back. Horns grew from his head, and spikes appeared along his back. Umbra gaped at the raichu-like creature with undisguised shock.

Yuuuuup, so he's really that fire-Pikachu thingy that didn't make the cut in Gen 2.

Sparks danced around Vale's pelt as he fell out of his battle-ready stance. "What," he began, "the f—"

"HEY! WHAT'S GOING ON UP THERE?"

Everyone froze at the sound of the innkeeper's voice, bellowing from below. The pounding sound of a pokemon running up the ramp followed.

Vale shook out of his stupor first. He turned and raced through the door.

Fantastic job, everybody.

"Wait!" the zoroark growled, pouncing towards him.

Umbra intercepted her with a metallic headbutt, knocking her out of the air and sending her sprawling on the ground. She put one foot on the zoroark's torso, holding her second jaw up in a striking position.

"Vale, what in the blazes is going on in there?" Umbra turned her head so that she could watch Vale out of the corner of her eye, while still watching the Zoroark. She could just see the simisear steaming on the other side of Vale, through the door. "You know the rules. No fighting in the inn."

Vale: "
Image

Though seriously, Meaad. Just poke your head in the doorway already."

"Sorry about that, Meaad," Vale answered gruffly. He stood at attention, stiff and serious. "I had to put a sudden end to a dispute up here. Won't happen again. And if it does, I'll escort them out myself. We'll see if they like fighting after spending a night in jail."

"You have the space for that?" Meaad asked. Now he just sounded confused. Umbra wasn't surprised; Nip and Tempest wasted most of the jailspace, from the way Vale talked. There was no room for these four.

Umbra: "Hey wait a minute, Vale... if I were to do something to get put into this... 'jail' that conveniently would force me to share a cell with Nip..."
Vale: "Not now, Umbra!"
:AlviseAngry:


The simisear tried to lean around Vale. The zoroark gasped, then suddenly Umbra wasn't pinning her down, but instead a small, frail charmander. The other pokemon changed back to normal forms as well.

Meaad let out a huff of air and looked back at Vale. "Right. Then see to it."

Vale: "You sure are touchy about others seeing you for what you really are, you know that? What's the matter, can't handle a little sunlight?"
:AlviseDetermined:

Suli: "Oh shut up." >_>;

Umbra heard receding footsteps, then Vale slipped back through the door, kicking it shut behind him. An invisible force shoved her, then the disguised zoroark slithered out from beneath her and scampered back to stand in front of the others.

"Now, where were we?" Vale asked, lazily looking the pokemon over. His gaze settled on the "charmander" and he clenched his jaw. "Oh, right. Listen. I got him off your tail, but that doesn't mean you're free to go. Now talk."

There was a pause, then the zoroark shed her fake form. Her teammates remained disguised, however. She tilted her head and crossed her arms, lips drawn back in a snarl. "Why should we?"

Vale: "Lady, you have no idea how things work around here, do you?"
:AlviseDetermined:

Skorch: "Uh... Susana? That look he's got's starting to worry me." ._.

Umbra mimicked her pose, raising her back jaw overhead to show off her maw and rows of pointed teeth. "I don't think you understand the situation you're in, Zoroark."

Vale stepped forward, sparks rippling through his fur as he continued where Umbra left off. "We just caught you red-pawed with a stolen Expedition Society badge, impersonating a team. You're looking at cycles of jail time. Or worse, if I report you as attacking a guard. But I'm giving you a chance to explain yourselves. A chance to explain why you're doing this and — perhaps if your answer is satisfactory — a chance to lessen your charges."

Vale, you do realize that there's likely enough 'monpower in the room to kill you without really trying, right?

The zoroark's expression faltered. She turned her head to look back at the rest of her team. Each nodded to her before her gaze shifted to the next. Umbra could feel a headache coming on. But to her surprise, the zoroark turned back, the rest of the illusion dropping.

"Fine," the zoroark began with a sigh. "My name is Susana. We're not explorers. We're an advance team for a group that sailed in from offshore. We made landfall a few months — moons — ago."

I knew it.

"Offshore?" Vale asked with a tilt of his head. "How far are we talking?"

"A whole continent," the zoroark answered.

"Preposterous," Umbra cut in. "There is no way to safely travel across the sea. The stars guide us, but the methods for transporting many pokemon would be impossible."

Elty: "O RLY?"
:bleplithe:

Vale: "Shut up, kid. This isn't even your story right now."
:AlviseAngry:


"I can't help it if you haven't figured out how to advance that far," Susana snarled. "Believe it or not, that's on you, but I am only speaking the truth now."

Umbra wasn't convinced, but she gestured for the zoroark to continue.

"We've been researching the gods that the pokemon on this continent follow in an effort to compare them to our own stories. And to, perhaps, further advance our society." She crossed her arms again. "But that's all you're getting out of me."

Again:
Image


Umbra gave Vale a serious look. "So, what are you going to do?"

Vale's tail swished back and forth twice before he answered. "Take them in, I guess, for impersonating. I can write off most of the other stuff, but their explanation is unsatisfactory for that. And there's an argument to be had that they took advantage of Meaad's discounted accommodations for pokemon working for incorporated powers."

Uh, Vale, I really think that you don't want to be sticking your paws into the business they've got going on considering how they got that badge in the first place.

The zoroark's expression turned aggressive once again. "Now hold on—"

But before she could say more, Umbra held up a paw to stop her. "Wait. I have an idea. Clearly you four have something you're still hiding. Perhaps we can… come to an agreement."

Vale lowered his head so that it was next to Umbra's and spoke in a low tone. "What are you getting at?"

Oh, so Umbra and Vale are going to blackmail these four into trying to knock off Nip, huh?

Umbra turned back to speak to him directly, keeping her second jaw facing the strange pokemon. "Think about it. The way they talk, they're in deep trouble if they get caught. We may be able to use that to our advantage. To deal with our… situation."

"Oh. I see." Vale's tail stuck out stiffly behind him. "But which part?"

"Nip. We can discuss how to get back at Jhorlo separately. Though we may be able to twist this to make him look bad."

Yuuuup, I figured that's where Umbra was going. Even if I'm pretty sure that this is not going to go remotely to plan.

"You know I can hear everything you're saying, right?" Susana interjected.

Vale exchanged one last serious glance with Umbra, then straightened up as she turned. "Good," he began. "Then you should understand your situation. You help us with something and get out of town, we pretend none of this happened."

The raichu-like creature glared at him through narrowed eyes. "And why should we? There's four of us and only two of you. We could just knock you out and get out of here on our own.

Vale:
Image

Topaz: "Yeah, well I'm not exactly hearing a counterargument from you, bub."
:typhNOsion:


"And there's at least four pokemon below us that would come running at the sound of battle," Umbra responded nonchalantly. She had a feeling it was a bluff; most of the pokemon here were far too soft to get involved. But it still got her point across. "And if you run off, then you don't get to go to the shrine like you wanted."

"That's right," Vale added, taking a threatening step forward. "And what do you think happens to pokemon that attack a guard? I'll give you a hint. I've always wondered what zoroark tastes like."

Well that got really creepy really fast, I'll heavily take the under on Vale staying on the mortal coil in the long term, since that's definitely not helping his audience sympathy right now.

Also, I'm starting to get a few ideas of how it is that Theran Village is going to get lazored from the face of the planet in the future.

Susana froze, eyes wide. The false raichu was less restrained. "You're sick!" he shouted, sparks flying from his cheek-sacs.

This is absolutely going to get Theran Village razed to the ground by Zaid, I can already tell.

But neither Umbra nor Vale acknowledged him. Instead, they kept their eyes on Susana.

"F-fine. Fine," she finally said, ears laying flat against her skull. "What are your demands?"

Umbra grinned, showing her fangs as she stepped forward. "We have a certain… troublesome pokemon locked up here. A sneasel. I need him… gotten rid of. Killed, for his crimes against my kin. But the village has been too soft on him. You capture him for me, so I can finish the job, and this little incident stays quiet."

Susana: "Lady, did you seriously just threaten to kill and eat us for the sake of knocking off a 'mon who's already just sitting around in a cell?" >_>;
Vale: "I did that, and don't try my patience, buddy! So do we have a deal or not?"
:AlviseAngry:


"Where is the sneasel?" the charizard asked. "Just in the jail?"

"He works various community service jobs during the day," Vale answered. "But we keep him locked in the jail at night, along with a ninetales. If you get rid of the ninetales, too, great. But I'm less concerned about him."

Susana mulled it over a minute, reaching up to scratch behind her ear. "Seems like a reasonable deal. There's just one problem. We're leaving tomorrow. So if you want to make this work, it best be fast."

Vale: "Hah! Bold of you to think you're in any position to set demands right now!"
:AlviseLaughing:

Umbra: "Um, Vale? We should probably hear them out right now."

"What?" Sparks bounced out of Vale's fur, dying away on the floor as he crouched. "What happened to bringing the bidoof back?"

"Oh, that?" Susana didn't miss a beat. "Skorch here" — she gestured to the charizard — "was going to fly her back when we were done, while the rest of us prepare to scale up the mountain."

You see, considering how they have been casually lying this whole time to separate parties, that makes me a bit worried about what they were really going to do with Haru.
:fearfullaugh~1:


"That's a fool's errand," Vale warned, though he returned to a neutral stance. "Going up the mountain, I mean. More capable pokemon than I have perished on the climb. But if you insist, well, it seems like a reasonable plan."

Umbra couldn't care less what they did with the bidoof. For all she cared, they could take her back or leave her to starve, so long as Nip was captured. She crossed her arms and tilted her head, so that she was staring Susana in the eye. "Well? Do we have a deal?"

Skorch: "Uh... Susana? Why didn't you tell them that we needed at least a day to prepare before we could knock off that Sneasel of theirs? We could've just ghosted this place after making it to the shrine!"
:ohnowen:

Susana: "(... Crap.) U-Uh, actually, about those terms earlier-"
Umbra: "Do. We. Have. A. Deal. Or. Not?" >:|

"What do you guys think?" Susana turned back to her team. "Topaz? Skorch?"

"No issues," the fake raichu answered.

"None from me," Skorch replied. "Remer?"

The girafarig shifted in his nest. "I think we should come to a compromise." Both heads looked directly at Umbra. Her skin crawled as she stared back at the unnatural pokemon, but she refused to let it show.

Those guys are absolutely planning something, since I don't fully buy that they're just rolling over for all of this so quickly.

"You want the sneasel," he continued, "and we want up the mountain without interruption. I say we nab the sneasel and take him with us up the mountain. Alive. If we return empty-pawed, or don't return at all, then you can rat us out. But this gives us… insurance that you'll keep your word."

Skorch: "Oh my gods, Remer, you're not supposed to tell them that out loud!" >.<
Susana: "We... need to have a team meeting sometime after all this about staying on the same page as each other." >_>;

Umbra scowled, narrowing her eyes. "I refuse to let that waste of breath, that blight on Yveltal's good name, leave my sight."

"Then what do you suggest?" Susana asked flatly.

Umbra's simplest answer was that she just refused to compromise, flat out. But she suspected that would not go over well. So instead, she found a separate option. "I will accompany you. I care not what you're doing, nor how long it takes, so long as I am able to finish him at the end." Perhaps she shouldn't be so single-minded. But she was sick of waiting.

Vale: "Wait, Umbra, are you sure that's a good idea when there'd be four of them and one of you-?"
:AlviseDumbfounded:

Umbra: "Vale, shut up. I know what I'm doing, alright?" >_>;

The false explorers shared a glance between each other. No words were spoken, but they clearly were of a single mind. Finally, Susana turned back.

"Fine, that can be arranged."

"There's one possible issue," Topaz said, raising a paw. "What about the bidoof? How is she going to react to all this?"

"I doubt she'll raise a stink," Vale answered. "She doesn't like the sneasel either. She doesn't want him here and she wants him to see real justice as much as we do."

Haru is absolutely going to become the spanner in the works, isn't she?

Umbra wasn't entirely convinced. The bidoof had tried to stop her before, when they'd first tried to catch Nip. But that was also before his crimes were proven. Perhaps it would be different now.

Skorch's voice brought her attention back to the conversation. "We can do a trade off, if needed. So long as we're careful. With a bit of direction, I can fly to catch up, covertly pass off the sneasel, while Haru is distracted at the shrine, then fly her back."

Susana tilted her head. "It's risky, but I suppose that works."

Remer: "... Wait, so we're not just ghosting them at the first possible opportunity?"
Susana: "Remer. Shut. Up." >.<

"What about Jhorlo?" Vale's voice came in a low tone, just beside her ear.

She could care less about Jhorlo. Once she was out of here, he was Vale's problem. But she had a feeling he wouldn't appreciate that answer. "We can discuss that privately. I don't think we can expect help for that one from these pokemon."

Vale seemed satisfied enough with the answer, as he stood up. "Seems reasonable," he said to the others. "Then do we have a deal?"

Susana bobbed her head. "I believe we do." Then she took a seat, picking up a map that had been left on the ground. "Now, what do you have in mind?"

This is going to turn out to be a massive disaster, I can already tell. Though, onto the recap:

Whelp, I officially feel validated as having called who Susana and the others really were from the moment their true natures were revealed. Though I can already tell that Umbra and Vale's stunt here is going to come back to bite them in the ass given that Susana's associates knocked off an exploration team for that badge she's holding, which is not a good omen for how safe they will be to deal with on a personal level, or for Theran Village as a whole. I thought that the chapter did a pretty good job at taking things in an unexpected direction since I definitely didn't see things wind up going here at the end of the last chapter, nor that this would be the vehicle that all the strands of the ongoing plot wind up coming together again. And... yeah, I'm honestly convinced that this is going to wind up being the catalyst for that disaster that Muse keeps having premonitions of. Since just word of what Vale and Umbra threatened Susana and her party with getting out, let alone them actually making good on it... well, punitive raids have been launched over much less than that in human history.

For critiques, I didn't have a whole lot to say beyond what I marked up in my review. Though there was one bit of logic that tripped me up a bit about this chapter.

Now, while part of it might have been deliberate on the part of Susana and the gang's part for playing along to get immediate danger off their back, I kinda wonder if Vale and Umbra ought to have done more of an aggressive job at shutting down why "run off into the woods, roll a new disguise" wouldn't be an option for Susana and the gang or else more of an acknowledgement from their end as to why that's not an option for them. Since unless if Umbra and Vale are planning on babysitting those four until it's showtime with Nip, going "Suli? Never heard of her" and passing yourself off as the likes of traveling merchants suspiciously interested in getting up to Theran Village's shrine is probably the rational course of action for them. I suppose it could come up in the next chapter just as easily, but it felt like a fairly easy way to short-circuit the present attempt at blackmail that neither side seems to address.

But all-in-all, it didn't take me that out of things @windskull . Just one chapter off from getting current with your story, and it seems like things are heating up really, really fast in this story.
 
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Spiteful Murkrow

Busy Writing Stories I Want to Read
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Partners
  1. nidoran-f
  2. druddigon
  3. swellow
  4. lugia
  5. quilava-fobbie
  6. sneasel-kate
  7. heliolisk-fobbie
Heya, picking this up since my November is shaping up to be fairly busy, so figured that was as good a reason as any to try and clear the deck and get caught up with PWCH again. So let's dive right into…

Chapter 21

Though as a heads-up, you have this chapter labeled as '22' for some reason as of the time of this review’s posting.

The sun was starting to dip behind Mount Domo, casting deep shadows into the woods as Haru arrived home. Though she had steadily made her way back, she froze just outside the door, heart fluttering. Would Shimmer and Muse still be here, waiting to confront her? And what of Toshi and her parents? She'd skipped out on work after their spat, something that hadn't happened in cycles. Just thinking about the coming earful was painful enough.


Haru: "... Yeah, I should've stopped by the bar before heading home, since getting plastered enough to not remember any of that coming chewout probably would've been wise."
:CabotScared:


There was only one sensible thing to do.


Turn around and get sloshed at the bar? :V

Haru pushed through through the entry curtain and made straight for her room, replying to her mother's greeting with little more than a grunt.


That works too, though I'm surprised that Saku let her get away with that instead of cutting in and forcing Haru to sit down and talk.

Guess that's a sign that she hasn't realized yet that Haru dodged an entire day's worth of work.

She paused again just inside. Her room was sparse; she'd never found much need for little trinkets and other specialty items. They were a waste of money. Though she had a shelf, it only held a few well-worn books and a couple old wood-whittled figures. She'd made one a few cycles back, part of a short-lived art experiment. The other was a gift from her grandfather.


I'm a little surprised that she keeps that around given that every time we've seen Haru think about Catkin in this story, it's always in an upsetting or traumatic context. Like with how frequently she goes war flashbacks over Catkin's dying days, my default assumption would've been that she'd keep something like this hidden this in a corner somewhere to keep it from upsetting her.

She made a straight line for a nest tucked in the back corner of the room, passing a low desk along the way. There, she collapsed faced down, burying herself in the straw without bothering to take her bags off.

And she remained like that for some time. At some point, her father stopped in her doorway and tried to make conversation, but she just grunted at him. She was left alone after that.


Haru: "Well, he didn't stop and shout at me for being a deadbeat for skipping work, so... yay?" -_-;

But she couldn't avoid her family forever. Eventually, the call for dinner forced her to climb to her paws. Only then did she bother slipping out of her bags and returning to the common room.

Toshi had already sat at the table, as had her dad. Her mom had prepped dinner tonight and was currently setting portions and drinks around the table. The scent of fresh bread and caramelized carrots sent her stomach rumbling.

Haru: "... I don't suppose mom and dad would buy me coming down with a stomachache that put me off work all day, would they?" ._.

She avoided her brother's gaze as she took a seat across from him. A chunk of bread with dipping oil, a simple salad, and a few roasted veggies in a savory sauce were spread across the plate in front of her. A cup of water sat to the side, but a small dispenser of spiced oran wine was at the center of the table. She wondered if her parents brought it out for a special occasion, or if they planned to drink to forget everything going on in the village. She was tempted, herself, but she couldn't run the risk of getting tipsy tonight. Not when she needed to get up early.


A simple meal, but it honestly made me a little hungry just reading that description, so good job there.

They ate in silence for a few moments, none wanting to broach the subject of her earlier behavior.

Her mom was the first to speak, her sentences punctuated between bites of food. "Well. You were right, Chip. That sneasel can do some good work. A shame he doesn't apply himself. Perhaps things would have turned out better for him if he did."


Haru: "(Oh stars, even at dinner I seriously can't escape Nip?!)" >.<

"Are you thinking of asking for his help again?" Chip asked. "'Gigas knows we could use it right now."

Haru groaned inwardly. Oh please no, she thought. I can't deal with that right now. Just send him off to the Enforcers already. But she kept her thoughts to herself, not looking to bring any attention.


Oh hey, I wasn't that far off, though boy is that not a good look for you right now, Haru.

"Perhaps," Saku answered. "His help came in handy today, considering we were short handed. Which reminds me…" Her gaze drifted to Haru, who shrank down behind the table. "Dear… You didn't come back from your break. Toshi told us you ran off. What happened?"

Haru:
:uhhh:

Saku: "Dear, we had to touch on this topic eventually..."
:eltyunamused:


"It was nothing important," Haru answered quickly, paws digging into the fabric. "I just needed some fresh air. I went to town and then…" She trailed off, silently cursing herself.

In all the excitement, then worry, she hadn't bothered to come up with an excuse for tomorrow's absence. If she was already being pestered about today, how was she supposed to explain running off with some explorers without sounding weird? If her parents knew the truth, they'd probably think she was going to the shrine out of spite and try to talk her out of it.

Was she going out of spite?

No. She was going to protect Toshi. That's all.


She is absolutely going there out of spite, isn't she?

Though IMO, that first paragraph might work a bit better if it were hacked into two smaller ones.

"I got to talking with some travelers while I was there," she began, mind racing as she formed the lie. Her stomach twisted with guilt. "And they asked me to help with a job. They needed some logging done down river and I offered to help out." She fought the urge to cringe. Now that she said it, the story sounded pretty weak.

"Travelers, huh?" Chip asked, pulling a bowl of wine closer. "You wouldn't happen to mean that group of explorers staying at the inn, would you?"

Haru:
Image


Chip: "I'm just going to take that as a 'yes'."

Haru swallowed and forced a smile. "Those are the ones. They were looking at setting up a camp. More of an outpost really. I don't think the village would agree to let them build one here, Jhorlo least of all. But no one owns the woods outside the village. It wouldn't be a bad idea to have one nearby in case of emergencies, you know?"

"Sure," Chip answered carefully. "But it has the potential to take away business from old Meaad. We see Society teams more often than we do any other type of traveler, save maybe merchants. Why would they come here if they got their own place?"


Haru: "They were kinda turned off by finding out the -ahem- things that go on at Meaad's rooms?" ^^;
Chip: "And did you have any role in telling them about that, Haru? Since I'm not sure if Meaad would terribly appreciate you scaring off his business." :|

"Well, they wouldn't have a hot, fresh meal if they're out in the woods," Saku pointed out.

"I think it's pretty cool," Toshi said, eyes sparkling. "Think about how much we could learn if there's more permanent teams in the area! I wish I was going instead."


Haru: "No, you really don't want to go instead, Toshi. Trust me on this one."
:grohno~1:

Toshi: "(And explain to me why I should trust you after you openly dumped on my beliefs in front of our friends today?)" >_>;

Haru's stomach twisted again. She hated how easily the lie had come, but at the same time, Toshi's reaction made her all the more certain she was doing the right thing by hiding the truth.


18 words thought- well, not seconds from disaster, but I can already tell that Haru's going to regret this in fairly short order in the grand scheme of things.

The conversation shifted to questions about Shimmer and Muse's wellbeing, then other topics that Haru didn't care to chime in on. Her attention drifted in and out as she picked at her food, her appetite waning.

Dinner ended with the last rays of sunlight. Chip excused himself to take his herbs, and Toshi retreated to his room to read. Only Haru and her mother remained.


Haru: "I'm... just gonna get up and take my leave right now-"
Saku: "Haru..."
- Saku folds her arms -
Saku: "Let's have a talk."

Just as Haru opened her mouth to excuse herself, Saku said, "Would you be a dear and help me clean up?"


Haru: "(Oh thank the stars, I'm not getting stuck in a super-awkward conversation about everything that happened earlier today.)"
:sweats:


Haru bit back a sigh. She should be getting to bed, considering she needed to rise early. But there was no use in debating her mom. If she tried to argue that she could make her own decisions, her mom would point out that she wasn't the homeowner, and that meant she had to help out around the house. Standing on her hind paws, she reached out across the table to gather up the dishes. Saku handed her a jar of luminous moss before taking the dishes, then the two of them staggered outside.

They stopped at the edge of the dam, pushing through the reeds until they were in the muddy shallows. A large stone stuck out along the edge, the top dry. There, they placed their burdens. Haru and Saku each took one of the ceramic plates and dunked them into the water.

"Is everything okay, Haru?"

Wonder how they filter that water of silt anyways, or do they just wipe off any residue that gets onto the plates afterwards?

Haru: "..."
:uhhh:

Saku: "... I'll take that as a 'no'." -_-;

Saku's question caught her off guard. She froze for a heartbeat, wide-eyed. "Of course. Why wouldn't they be?" She fought to keep the unease out of her voice.

Saku looked down at the water for a moment, silent. "Well… It's just… you've been acting strange lately, dear. Ever since that Sneasel showed up. When he first appeared, you were so interested in showing him around. I thought it great, since you rarely get out. But then he… well, you know."


Haru: "I'm the one who's been acting strange lately?" >_>;
Saku: "Well, yes. I don't seem to recall you being this harsh and argumentative before he came along."

It was clear her mom didn't want to bring up Nip's heinous act. And it made Haru wonder: if it bothered her so much, then why was she willing to work with him?

But she didn't get a chance to voice her thoughts, as her mom just kept plowing on. "And then you ran off with your friends into a dungeon—a dungeon—to apprehend him. I would have expected it out of Toshi, what with his adventurous streak. But you? I would have thought you'd avoid it, or try to talk them down."


Haru: "(Wait, was the trip into Sunglow Thicket really that uncharacteristic of me?)" .-.

"I did try," Haru argued. "I just figured… it was better if I went with them, to keep them out of trouble."

"Even the second time?" Saku pressed. It seemed that was a rhetorical question, because she continued, "But it wasn't just that. Since then, you've been in a foul mood—don't think I haven't noticed. And now you're running off with strangers. Is there something wrong? You know you can talk to me, right?"


Oh hey, I called it about Saku noticing Haru's mood taking a turn for the worse after Nip came along. :V

Haru: "It's not a 'foul mood', alright?!" >_>;
Saku: "Haru, you're literally in a foul mood right now."
:typhNOsion:


Haru fought to control her annoyance, then wondered why she was so annoyed. "Well, I'm not really running off with strangers," she said. "I'm running off to do a job for strangers. I think there's a difference there. As for the other stuff…" She trailed off, taking a deep breath. Surely her mom could understand her anger?


That's a bold assumption to be making when she's stated that she's noticed you've been crabby since Nip came along and not already floated ideas of why that might be, Haru.

"I went into Sunglow Thicket for two reasons. I already said the first. The second time, I wanted to make sure Nip faced proper judgment, instead of being offed by someone willing to take hostages just to get to him. He was brought back, all but admitted to the destruction of several eggs—most of them maliciously—and then got nothing more than community service. Surely you can understand why I'm frustrated?"

Saku sat her rinsed dishes on the stone, then pushed out further into the water, disappearing beneath the rippling surface. Haru remained in the shallows, blinking. But her mother returned a minute later, expression pensive. She gestured for Haru to follow her out. With a sigh, the rest of the dishes were cast aside, and Haru slipped into the cool water.


Haru: "Oh stars. Mom, please tell me you understand why I'm frustrated right now."
:grohno~1:

Saku: "Haru, let's... take a step back a bit."

There was no danger in this small pool, created by their own handiwork. And there would be no prying ears in the center.

"I do understand," Saku said once Haru joined her. "But I also know much of your behavior is unhealthy. Toshi told me about how you left earlier, though he wouldn't go into the details." The bibarel tilted her head upwards, gazing at the stars. Her wet fur glistened in the moonlight. "Whatever's going on, I can't force you to tell me. But I want you to know that I'm here, if you ever need to talk."


Haru: "My behavior's unhealthy?!" >.<
Saku: "
Image

I mean, are you going to tell me with a straight face that this broody and snippy attitude of yours where you push everyone away and get upset with them over minor disagreements is healthy?"

Treading water, Haru turned so that she was facing her mother. She struggled to find her words. How was her behavior unhealthy? Sure, she'd been quick to anger recently. She could admit as much. But surely that anger was justified? "I know," she finally said. "I'm still figuring some of it out for myself. But if I need anything, I'll let you know."


I'm... not convinced that you're going to get a chance to do this by the time you realize you do need something, Haru.
:fearfullaugh~1:


"Good girl," her mother replied. "Now, we should get to bed. We wouldn't want to catch a chill!" Her tail slapped the surface of the water, and she dove, reappearing back in the shallows. Haru followed behind slowly. She stopped for a moment to load the dishes onto her mother's tail. Then they both went inside.


Some impressive balance there by Saku, though you can't say that it's not a nice reminder that we're dealing with sapient beavers here.

Haru lay awake for some time after that, tossing and turning in her nest. Worry gnawed at her as she went over the conversation with her mom. Should she tell her mom the truth? About where she was going?

No. It would only worry her more. And the last thing she wanted was to worry her.

Soon, she drifted into a fitful sleep.

Image


Once again, an endless expanse of water stretched out before Nip, mimicking the orange of the cloudless sky. The fur on the back of his neck prickled as he walked through the shallows, sending ripples on the otherwise still surface. He was vaguely aware that he was dreaming, and that it was the same dream that he'd had countless times. But he couldn't fathom why he was here again.


Wait, is this that same freaky sequence with the tree like 15 chapters ago, or is this something new?

The same hill from his previous dreams—the one with the dying tree—appeared in the distance, the tree's branches spreading wide like outstretched claws. Involuntarily, he sped up, light on his feet as he raced towards the hill. Every time he dreamed of this place, he always fell into deep water before he reached it—and he'd had the dream several times since Celebi's appearance. The last thing he wanted was to wake up from the sensation of water filling his lungs, choking the life out of him.


Yup, it is indeed that dream. Though from the fact that we're revisiting it, I suppose that something's going to be different about it this time.

But as he approached, the water remained shallow, only reaching his ankles. His pace slowed as he reached the base of the hill.

Tall grass waved in an imperceptible breeze. Beams of dying sunlight poked between the branches of the tree, dappling the grass with golden pools. He slunk up the soggy bank and into the neck-deep blades, climbing until he reached the base of the tree.

Thin ashen bark peppered the base of the tree, cracked and peeling away to reveal pale wood beneath. The bark thinned away further up the twisting trunk, disappearing around the gnarled branches. No leaves remained. Nip knew little about trees, but if this one wasn't dead already, surely it was dying?


Nip: "Um... yeah, I'll heavily take the under on this tree being alright." ._.

His attention shifted to its base, where roots poked up through the dirt. Nestled between two of these roots, something out of place caught his eye. A blood-colored feather. He picked it up.

The feather was nearly as long as his arm and mostly that deep blood color, tapering to a midnight black as it reached the afterfeather. Nip wracked his brain as he tried to come up with different pokemon the feather could have come from. It was too big for a sneasel, and they didn't usually taper to black. Talonflame, maybe? But he didn't think they had feathers this long, either. It would have to be an incredibly large one.


Nip: "W-Wait a minute! This is-!"

Then a long-buried memory of a lesson back in his old nesting grounds surfaced, and he pictured an old historic painting. Though the details faded with time, he could still picture the deep bloody feathers of a bird—his patron—perched on a tree with her wings spread wide.

"Yveltal?" His voice was barely more than a whisper, pulled away and made inaudible by a sudden gust of wind.

Nip: "Is... Is she speaking to me through my dreams?" .-.

This feather belonged to Yveltal. It had to. Then was this the tree from the painting? It couldn't be; it was old and wizened and dead. The tree in the painting was lush and vibrant. Covered with plant life and teeming with the spirits of the departed. This was a stark opposite.


Nip: "I mean, I already found out that everything I thought I knew about one god was a lie, b-but Yveltal too...?"
:grohno~1:


He turned and raced away from the tree, fur bristling as he scanned the sky for any signs of his god. All the while calling out, "Yveltal! Yveltal I am here! Is this a vision? Is this something more? What do you need of me?"


Nip: "I don't suppose you could just appear and tell me the answer, could you?" ^^;

A quiet splish-splash signaled that he had run back into the water. His foot caught on something just beneath the surface. Stumbling, he waved his arms wildly, but it was no use. With a yowl, he tumbled into the water. Deep into the water, as if the bank weren't even there. An invisible current pulled him away from land, dragging him deeper and deeper into the depths. The feather spiraled up and away, leaving him behind in the darkness, lungs burning.

But he wasn't alone.

Nip: "W-Wait, what?! W-Who else is-?!" O_O;

The current swirled as a massive, dark figure swam around him. Vision blurred by water, he couldn't see well. But as the figure came to a stop just above him, watching him sink, he could just make out the form of two great dark wings, and two bright blue eyes that glowed with some emotion he couldn't place.


Wait, is that Yveltal again, or someone else?

He opened his mouth to say something, only to gag and panic as he sucked in a lungful of water. No, not water. This fluid was thicker, more viscous, and had a familiar flavor. Yolk. He was drowning in egg yolk. He flailed, desperate to reach the surface, but his vision was fading fast. And soon, all he could make out were those two smoldering eyes.


Oh, so it's basically the Pokémon equivalent of drowning in the blood of unborn children. That's a lovely thought there.

Before the end, he heard a voice.

You do not belong…

Nip: "N-No! Yveltal, wait! H-Hear me out, please-!"

Nip gasped awake, coughing and sputtering. He flailed in the darkness, rolling onto his belly as if to vomit up swallowed water. But nothing came.

Of course nothing came; it was just a nightmare. He was still in Theran village, hidden away in his cell.

Bits of straw clung to his fur as he sat up, blinking. His flailing had scattered his nest, leaving him exposed. As he looked around the dimly-lit room, he could see two pairs of eyes watching him. One was Tempest, his expression betraying worry. The other was tonight's night guard, Anu.


Nip: "... Wait, don't you have a shrine to babysit right now?"
Anu: "We're a humble village that doesn't have much of a payroll for the guards. Some of us have to manage multiple jobs here." -_-;

He turned away from both of them, stood, and began to pace his small space, keeping his head low.

What was he supposed to make of his dream? He'd had it several times, but this time it was different. He'd found that feather… Yveltal's feather, he was sure of it!


Aha, so that ending sequence we saw was new for Nip. I'm guessing this is teeing up a goal for the longer term for the resident knifecat of this story.

Did that make this more than a dream? A vision? He wasn't a psychic. He'd never been gifted—or cursed, for that matter—with the power of prophecy. And yet, he'd had the same dream so many times; that had to mean something!


I mean, "you're going crazy" is an option, but knowing how stories like these work, I'm pretty sure that you're being called out to.

So what was he supposed to make of the ending? You do not belong. Who had said it? Yveltal? Was Yveltal abandoning him? Did Yeveltal even care about him to begin with?


Nip, is Yveltal even aware of your existence right now? Since if she's not, how could you reflexively assume that she'd care about you to begin with?

A tiny, pathetic whimper escaped his lips as he scraped his claws together, catching on every nick and chip. Some of the damage came from hard labor, while other parts came from striking at his cell walls as he tried to calm his frazzled nerves. It wasn't like he was using them for anything else, anyways. He couldn't remember the last time he'd hunted; it was some time before arriving here, in this cursed town that had destroyed his last shred of hope.


That... was kinda on you there, Nip. Though the way Jhorlo's running the ship right now certainly isn't helping on that front.

With another whimper, he slumped to the ground, cheek meeting the wood flooring.

"Having nightmares, are you, Nip?"

Ah yes, another heart-to-heart between Nip and Anu. Though I'm starting to understand why this chapter is called 'Night Talks'. Let's see where this one winds up going.

Anu's question brought Nip out of his sulking. He turned his head so that he could see the lucario, but did not rise or otherwise reply.

"You were twitching and mewling in your sleep," Anu continued. His tone was factual, neither accusatory nor comforting. The corners of his mouth twisted upwards. And for just a moment, Nip thought he might be enjoying his suffering. But the rest of his body language suggested otherwise. "Ah, please forgive me. I… do not mean to pry. It's just…"


I mean, Anu literally admitted that he was bitter at Nip and wished he'd get his just desserts a couple chapters ago. I wouldn't rule out him having a bit of satisfaction at Nip's plight at the moment.

Anu took a deep breath. "I… I know you are religious. We spoke of your patron before. I don't know how central Celebi is to your beliefs. B-but I know his appearance has left many of the faithful shaken. Celebi does not act like the myths say. What does that mean about the rest of the myths? About everything we grew up believing? If your nightmares are anything of that nature, I can't say I blame you, but know that you are not alone."


That you should keep an open mind to them being wildly off-base and not get so hung up over minutiae about your folklore?

What do you know? Nip thought ruefully. Still, he sat up so that he could better look at Anu. And Tempest, for that matter. The ninetales watched from his own cell, tails slowly waving, almost hypnotic.


I mean, Anu did accurately predict that your dream was similarly about challenging your belief system. Dunno how much of that was from handicapping from Aura, but he clearly knows more than you would reflexively assume, Nip.

"I find it curious," Anu continued, following Nip's gaze. "Celebi's appearance has affected you far more than it has Tempest. Why is that?"

Nip considered ignoring him. What good would it do to talk about this? But after a moment, he realized Anu was giving him something other than his dreams to focus on. Or trying to, at least.

Actually, I'm a bit curious myself as to why Tempest is so unfazed while Nip and half the village are freaking out about Celebi. Is this an implication that Tempest has always put a bit less stock in the gods than normal?

"Tempest really should be the one telling you about this," he began, shifting so that he was in a more comfortable position, "but I supposed that isn't an option right now. Tempest wasn't born to the Half-Moon tribe. Instead, he joined as an adult. He's told me that, as a child, he belonged to a separate tribe from further north, a group of ice-types that worshiped the remains of the Original Dragon, Kyurem.


Ah right, Tempest was narrating that part of the opening to that effect. Though I'm wondering where Nip's going with this right now.

"Kyurem was not known to be kind to the living. At best, it was a callous defender of its followers. But some of their stories described it as openly malicious to mortals. And yet, they still followed it, because they believed themselves to be Kyurem's chosen, the only ones that it looked after." He glanced at Tempest. "Did I remember that correctly?"

Tempest dipped his head.

Anu: "... Wonderful god they have there, really."
:ohnowen:



"How fascinating," Anu said, shifting in place. He took a deep breath and held it for some time before continuing. "Perhaps I can use this to illustrate my point. From… From what you've told me, there are conflicting stories about this Kyurem. Some characterize it as a defender, others as something more sinister. And it's hard to believe that both of these stories could be true. In fact, it's entirely possible that they're not. But there are more than two stories. I imagine there are countless tales."


Cue the random village on the other side of the continent that sees Kyurem as Santa through some contrived historical event that's undergone untold generations of memetic mutation.

His paw came alight with aura as he waved it in the air. "I imagine there are many conflicting stories about Celebi, as well. The myths around here characterize him as a valiant hero, traveling through time to bring both the blessings and the curses of the future. He's said to be noble and stalwart, and always having the interests of the good at heart."

"Yes, that's not too far from our stories," Nip replied. "What is your point?"


Anu: "Nip, if he's a hero to us, then it wouldn't be out of the realm of possibility that to some other Pokémon out there, he'd be a villain."
Nip: "... What sort of messed-up Pokémon would see Celebi as a villain?" .-.
Anu: "I mean, after what we saw of him... are you really going to rule out that there's not some village out there that he didn't bring a disaster on? If even by accident?"
:fearfullaugh~1:


"Well, we've now met Celebi, and know he exists. And we also know that the legends weren't entirely correct. And yet, there are still morsels of truth based on what we've seen. He did come to warn us, a small village, of dangers, even if he went about it in a… strange way. And knowing that part of the story is true, we must find comfort in that." Anu's voice grew firm. "Perhaps we need to revisit our legends. Reevaluate what we hold true. But in the end, we still cannot know everything. And we will have to take some things on faith."


Ah yes, I'm very familiar with that train of thought from some of my writing. Though it's solid advice on Anu's part, frankly.

Faith. That was easy for Anu to say. He wasn't the one whose every decision, every justification for everything questionable he ever did, was shattered by the legends being wrong. Then he mentally berated himself for thinking like that. Anu had to contend with the cruelties of the world, too, and shaken beliefs made that harder.


That's... a bold assumption to make there, Nip. Since I'm pretty sure that it's been implied in the past already that Anu has some level of awareness of what's going on between Theran Village and the nearby wildeners behind the scenes.


"Thanks," he finally said, "but… there's more to it than that."

"Oh?" Anu tilted his head, then scooted a little closer to the cell. "If you wish to talk about it, I'm all ears."

"What?" Nip flinched and copied Anu's expression, his ear twisting flat against his skull. "Why would you want to know? Do you wish to mock me?"


Anu: "I'm the local cleric and it's my job to ensure that the local villagers have the most correct understanding possible of the Pokémon we venerate?"
:what:

Nip: "None of which are Yveltal." >_>;
Anu: "Look, you clearly weren't doing well earlier. I... just want to see what's going on in your mind a bit."

Anu was quiet for a moment. "I-if I'm speaking honestly, a part of me wants to. N-not mocking necessarily." He held his paws up in a defensive gesture. "Just… Just let you wallow in your misery, r-rather.


Nip: "So you were enjoying watching me suffer earlier." >.<
Anu: "Look, I said a part of me wanted to let you wallow in your misery. That's not all of me." >_>;

"B-but I won't!" He continued before Nip could reply. "Because I have a job to do. Despite everything, it would be unbecoming of me. I could yell and scream and hurt you, but it would go against everything I stand for." A beat of silence followed. "And I hope—perhaps foolishly—that extending kindness to you will help you settle, and finally understand our way of life. And then, perhaps, you can be sent on your way."


Ah yes, conflict between duty and base desire from a holy man analogue. For whatever reason, we don't see this character premise done an awful lot in PMD stories, even if it can be pretty compelling if done well, which Anu thus far has been pulling off.

Nip's anger dissipated, replaced with surprise. And confusion. His fur slowly lay flat, and the tension left his shoulders.

Anu watched him unblinkingly, then he turned his head and stood. "There… is one other thing I wanted to talk to you about," he began. He turned and disappeared into a small room. A rustling sound followed, then he returned with a small bag in his paws, the long drawstring hanging down loosely.

"Here," Anu said, passing the bag between the bars. "I remember you eyeing this a few days back. Consider it a… peace offering of sorts."

Nip:
Image

Anu: "Look, at least look in the bag first before you spurn my offering." >_>;

Nip blinked, eying the bag cautiously. It certainly looked like the same bag, and it looked empty. But it made no sense.

"Why?"

Something something, Anu is feeling terrible about that gap between the 'mon he feels he ought to be as the town cleric and the 'mon he really is. Probably not helped by self-comparisons to his father.

Though really, don't question a good thing, Nip.

Anu sighed, dropping the bag just inside Nip's cell. "As I just said, holding a grudge would be hypocritical. I've… struggled to forgive you after what you did to my mate and I. But perhaps, with kindness, I can make you understand what it means to be a village pokemon. And perhaps I'll be able to break the cycle of revenge." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then sat down with his back straight. "The law will punish you for what you did wrong. My duty is to guide you on how to be better. So. If you ever need to talk about matters of faith, or anything at all, I will do my best to listen and assist."


Anu's... not going to get the chance to do this past the next 72-96 hours at the very most, is he?
:fearfullaugh~1:


For a moment, Nip stared at the bag laying at his paws, struggling to process his feelings. Based on everything he'd ever been taught, Anu shouldn't be helping him, shouldn't offer forgiveness. Even if he had reasons for doing what he did, and even if it was just the laws of nature, he still hurt Anu. And he struggled to fathom how he could just let it go like this. Or try to, at least.


Anu: "It's part of my religion?" ^^;
Nip: "With all due respect, but I think your religion's missing a few screws, buddy." >_>;
Anu: "Look, we're both having to challenge assumptions about our faiths in live-time. Just... give it a shot?"

At the same time, relief warmed his chest. Perhaps, if there was anyone that could provide answers to him, it would be Anu. And perhaps there was something he could help him with right now.

"Well," Nip began, fiddling with his claws. "There is… something I'd like to talk to you about." Anu gestured for him to continue, so he took a hesitant breath. "Over the last few days I've been having these… recurring dreams…"


Anu: "... Have you considered talking to Whisper about whether or not something's wrong with your food?"
:joltyshrug~1:

Nip: "It's not like that! Look, anyways, in these dreams that I'm having..."

But before he could continue, the sound of ruffling fabric caught their attention. Nip scented an electric current heartbeats before Vale stalked through the entryway, giving off frustrated sparks.

"Vale?" Anu stood up, tilting his head. "What are you doing here?"


... Oh, that's an absolutely terrible omen for Anu's immediate well-being right now.
:uhhh:


"I work here," Vale replied with a snort. "Do I need a reason? But if you must know, I actually came here to fetch you, Anu. I was passing by the temple on a night patrol and saw one of those explorers. He asked to see you."

Sticker, sceptilisk,


Yeah, I don't believe a word coming out of this mutt's mouth right now.

"Did you tell him I was busy?"

"Of course. Told him it was too early. Told him a bad time and to come back later after the sun had fully risen. Even threatened to chase him off. But he was insistent."


Anu: "I'm sorry, why am I not just leaving them to wait there again?"
:lucariwhat:

Vale: "Look, Anu. This spiritual mumbo-jumbo stuff is literally your job. Just give them a run-around for five minutes so they don't cause a public disturbance, alright?"
:AlviseUnamused:


Anu sighed, then glanced out the window. It was still dark. "Well, I can't go and see him right now, anyways. So he'll just have to wait till after my relief comes in, at least." His words were punctuated by a yawn.

"If you need relief, I can take over," Vale replied. He walked over to stand beside Anu. "You're just watching the prisoners for a while, right? I can take over until you get back. Already finished my rounds."


Vale's attempting to go behind Umbra and the others' back to gank Nip himself, isn't he?

"No, he can wait." Anu shook his head. "It would be unbecoming of me to leave my duty incomplete."

"But what about your duty to the patrons of the temple?" Vale countered, sparking. "I know you have a few visitors in the mornings. What if he heckles them like he did me?"

This, at least, seemed to make Anu hesitate.

Nip: "(Anu, you realize that 'mon hates my guts and has literally been openly wishing that I'd died back at the trial ever since then, right? I'm not exactly feeling super confident about being alone in a room with him!)"
:eltyscared:

Anu: "(Nip, he's stood guard over you before. Berating aside, I'm sure it'll be fine.)"

Nip watched the exchange through narrowed eyes. Why was Vale so insistent on taking over? He knew from experience that Vale didn't care to be around him or Tempest. Was he just looking for a way to harass them? Surely even Vale wouldn't go that far?


Vale:
Image

Nip: "Yeah, I know that! Could you make it any more obvious right now?!"
:grohno~1:


Finally, Anu sighed. "Very well. I will see if I can convince him to leave without a fight." His attention turned to Nip. "Apologies. We will continue this conversation another time." With a rustle of fabric, he was gone.

Vale lay down in front of the cells, watching Nip and Tempest with his mouth clamped shut. He looked in no mood to converse, and Nip didn't expect he had anything nice to say anyways, so he took a moment to gather up his scattered nest and settled down as if to sleep. But his nerves wouldn't let him. He felt electrified, alert after Anu's conversation. He doubted he would get any more rest, but he could at least lie down until the guards took him out in the morning.


Vale: "Bold of you to think you're gonna make it to morning, egg thief."
:AlviseDetermined:

Nip: "Oh gods... Anu, why would you just leave me with him?!"
:uhhh:

Anu: “Sorry, Nip. Duty calls.”


He wasn't sure how long he lay there awake. It must have been some time, because he could see the faintest outline of light around the doorway when the sound of a commotion outside caught his attention. Curious, he sat up.

Vale was already on his feet, letting out a guttural growl while sparks danced in his fur. "Hey! What's going on out there?" he barked, stalking towards the entrance with his head low and hackles raised.

A burst of flame greeted him, blasting him in the face as it engulfed the fabric covering. He let out a surprised yelp, stumbling back.


Ah yes, enforced method acting from Vale there. Though I can already tell he's going to whine to Skorch later over this.

Nip scrambled to his feet and pressed himself into the shadows in the corner of his cell. The acrid scent of burnt fur made him gag as he watched, looking for signs of life in the manectric. Vale groaned and shifted, but did not try to get up. Sparks danced weakly on his pelt but went nowhere.

As the flames died away, the attacker became clear. A great dark beast—a charizard with some physical quirks unfamiliar to him—rose to her feet. Her tail flicked back and forth as she watched Vale for signs of resistance. Then she snorted smoke and turned towards the door.


Yuuuuuuuup

"Subdued," she announced with a growl.

"Excellent," came a reply from just outside.

Nip's blood turned to ice. He stiffened, still crouching. He knew that voice all too well.

Flames still crackled in the doorway, illuminating a stout, familiar figure.

Umbra.


Oh, so it's Umbra who knifed Vale in the back. I'll admit, I didn't see that one coming, but that's pretty in-character for her.

Tempest sprang to his paws in an instant, lips curled in a soundless snarl. He stalked on the other side of his cell, hackles raised as the air in the room chilled. Nip's breath came out in frosty puffs as he pressed himself against the wall. Umbra was here. Umbra was here. Why was Umbra here? He knew. He knew he knew he knew.

He knew exactly why she was here.

Umbra:
:DEATH~1:
🔪
Nip: "Oh gods."
:eltyscared:


She entered the room with a leisurely gait, eyes trailing over the charizard and the downed Vale, then to Tempest, before her eyes finally settled on Nip. He knew she could see him. Smell him. He must be giving off a fear-scent…

Her posture shifted; if it had been anyone else, he could mistake her expression for friendly. But there was no hiding the malicious intent in her eyes.

Without taking her eyes off of Nip, she said to the charizard, "Find the keys, would you, Skorch?" The charizard lumbered away, leaving Nip her sole focus.


Skorch: "... I'm sorry, why are we just playing along with this right now and not bumping you two off and hiding your bodies long enough for us to get out to that shrine again?"
:unimpressed:

Umbra: "Because when the rest of the village puts two and two together, you'll be deader than a doorpost and they'll put prices on your head that will ensure you can't set foot anywhere on this continent in peace?"
Skorch: "... That sounds like a pretty good reason, really."
:ohnowen:


"Oh, how I have waited for this day," she began, her tone light and airy. "More than six moons, you have evaded my grasp. Managed to slink away. No, it has been longer, has it not? You have been a thorn in my side since the day we were made mates. But no more. Finally, almost three cycles of careful work is paying off."


Well that'd be a short story if so, so I doubt that this is going to go fully to plan right about now.

The strange charizard returned, dropping a ring of keys into Umbra's outstretched claws. She looked at them, frowning. "How am I supposed to use these, exactly?"

"It's not that difficult. Just stick one in the hole and turn until one of them unlocks the door." The charizard snorted smoke.


Skorch: "I can't believe that I'm seriously letting myself getting pushed around by a 'mon that doesn't know how to use keys..." >_>;
Umbra: "Look, just shut up and let me do my thing, alright?" >.<

"Do not patronize me," Umbra snapped back. Then she started sticking keys in, one at a time. By the third or fourth key, the cell door swung open. Just like that, the only barrier between himself and Umbra was gone.


Umbra:
Image

Nip:
Image


Nip tried to form frost around him, to call forth an ice shard. But he couldn't focus. He could only press himself against the wall as she marched towards him with a degree of nonchalance. She knew she had won, and she was taking the time to gloat.

"All the lies, all the cruelty and misdeeds, only to end like this. It is kind of pathetic, is it not?" She chuckled. "Then again, you always were pathetic. Well, do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Somehow. Nip found his tongue. And despite his defeat, bitter resentment coated his mouth and gave him the courage to growl a single sentence.

"You're a monster."


Umbra:
Image


Claws struck his cheek, then a blow to his stomach sent him reeling. He screeched, crumpling to the ground as white-hot pain radiated where fairy energy burned his skin—no, his very spirit. He felt his will to fight fading, succumbing to the pain. Why had he ever expected anything different? It always ended like this, with his face against the ground, a growing pain in his ribs, and Umbra standing over him, reminding him of how useless he was. Any time he showed defiance, this was the outcome. He should have known his death would be the same.

That's... got some implications for what Nip's life as Umbra's mate was like, and boy are they not pleasant. .-.

Then a blast of frigid wind sent him rolling backwards. He heard Umbra grunt and several dull thunks as he tried to climb to his feet, pelted by slush and chunks of ice. As his vision focused, he could see Tempest crouching with his gaze concentrated on Umbra, focused on creating more ice as he froze the air around him. He was attacking the mawile; Nip just happened to be caught in the blizzard.


Tempest: "I'm right here, you know!"
:seviAAAAAAAAAAA:

Umbra: "Agh, dammit, should've taken care of you first!" >.<

Umbra snarled, marching towards Tempest despite the layer of frost accumulating on her steely fur, only to fall short due to the bars between them. With a frustrated snort, she tossed the keys toward the charizard. "He clearly has a talent for surviving certain death and causing me trouble. Here. Deal with him." Her gaze shifted to the wooden floor and the furniture. "Or better yet… send this place up in flames. Then we can leave unimpeded while they deal with the fire."

"What?"

Vale sprang to his paws with speed that surprised Nip. Clearly he wasn't as injured as he'd first looked. "You can't do that," he sputtered. Do you have any idea how far that'll set back the town? And whose hide do you think it's going to come out of? Jhorlo's not a total idiot!"


Oh, well never mind then. Vale and Umbra are still on the same page right now. I'm honestly a little surprised that none of the three parties involved here hasn't tried to pull a fast one on the others just yet, since all of them strike me as having the motive to attempt that.

"He will figure it out either way. My disappearance and Nip's disappearance will be proof enough for him."

The manectric grunted, crouching. "Yes, but the destruction of the town destroying the guard hut isn't necessary. What if the fire spreads? Our quarrel is with Jhorlo and with the sneasel."

"We don't have time for this," the massive charizard growled, her tail flicking restlessly back and forth. "The lucario could return at any time. Just grab the sneasel and—"


Nip's going to sneak out through the open door, isn't he? Though suggested a small rephrasing of the point that Vale’s trying to make since his complaint would logically be about the specific building they’re in and not the town as a whole.

Nip was suddenly blinded by bright light, spots blooming in his vision. Yelps and grunts filled the air. But through it, Umbra still stood tall, her attention focused on Tempest, the source of the attack.

"Just do it," she snapped. "Before the ninetales gives us away."

Vale: "Umbra, did you listen to a single word that I just said?!"
:AlviseShocked:

Umbra: "
bdd.jpg

Now shut up and stop questioning my moves."

She was distracted. Nip crawled forward, claws digging into the wood as he dragged himself towards his cell door. This was his chance. If he could just reach the door, he could make a run for it. Even with the charizard on her side, he could hide in the bushes outside town. Get to the river and destroy his scent trail. He could run again, and find somewhere to start over.


Nip: "... Okay, I'm pretty sure that that's some unhealthy levels of cope there, but the alternative is getting barbecued right here, so..."
:fearfullaugh~1:


But doing so meant leaving Tempest behind to die. Umbra would never let Tempest live if his distraction let Nip escape. Leaving him to die was the coward's way out.

And yet, Tempest was causing a distraction now. Was he just fighting back? Or was he trying to give Nip an opening to escape?

Heart heavy with guilt and confusion, Nip continued to crawl out the cell door. Dawn light—freedom—was only a few bounds away.


Vale: "Wait, the sun is rising already?! Holy crap Umbra, you can't set this place on fire now of all times-!"
:AlviseScared:

Umbra: "Skorch, do it already!"

Fire erupted on his back, his world exploding in agony. The horrible smell of burnt fur and flesh choked him as he screamed, ears ringing. He scrambled, dragging himself forward. But the fire followed, until finally, he quit trying to avoid it. Though the flames died, the pain remained. He felt pressure on his back, digging into the fresh wounds. He had no strength to crawl.

Somehow both nearby and distant at the same time, he heard Umbra's voice. "Hurry up and set a fire. All that screaming will have attracted someone. Then we run. Vale, you need to look injured, go to…" But whatever else she was saying was lost. His cheek hit the ground, then the world went dark.

:unown_f:


Whelp, guess Nip's not getting out of that shrine run that easily. Though I have to wonder how on earth Tempest's going to get out of that one. .-.

Though I can already tell that things are going to go very, very sideways in (relatively) short order since Umbra is taking so many needless risks right now.

Alright, onto the recap:

Well that was an explosive note to end on. For a chapter that's primarily conversational and named accordingly, you still managed to take things into a direction that I honestly didn't see coming, so congrats on that. Definitely leaving the audience in suspense with that one since... yeah, that one's gonna leave a mark on Nip, and while I know you've got art depicting Tempest with Nip from a point in the story that Nip hasn't reached yet, it's going to be... uh... a story for how he gets out of this one here.

For things that I have critique-wise, I don't have that much that wasn't explicitly mentioned in the writeup already. That said, I kinda wonder if there should've been more obvious tension between Umbra, Vale, and Skorch there, since two out of those three are allies of convenience while the last is just flatly blackmailed into compliance. One would think that it'd result in a few more artifacts in their dynamic that Nip might have noticed.

Though this is all shaping up to be quite the glorious disaster there. Not sure when Chapter 22 will be dropping in the future, but I'll be keeping my eye out, @windskull . You've definitely got me on the edge of my seat for how this is all going to shake out, since I can already tell that nothing is going to be the same again after the dust settles from this arc.

Hope the feedback was helpful, and till next time! ^^
 
Last edited:

Negrek

The One Star
Staff
Hey, wind! Glad to be back with PWCH for Blitz this year. I think at this point I've caught up with all the content you've published so far... although it looks like you may be missing a Chapter 21? Chapter 22 seems to follow directly from 20, so I think that's a numbering issue rather than you having forgotten to upload a chapter. This review covers chapters 18-22 (21?) plus the extra with Catkin.

And we open with more mechanations! Muse is hiding things from Shimmer and, well, pretty much everyone. Umbra and Vale are hiding things from Jhorlo. Haru's hiding things from her friends. And the plot continues to thicken...

I was actually expecting Haru's trip to the tavern to result in her running into Umbra and Vale and perhaps catching wind of their plan. (And if she did, she'd probably take Jhorlo's side, wouldn't she? Haru, Haru, Haru...) It was cute that things actually played out the other way around.

So Susana's team fields some beta pokémon, huh? Beta pokémon she neglected to reveal to Haru... I definitely enjoy the multiple layers of secrets and hidden motives that many of the characters in this story have. What we've seen of these type of pokémon suggests they aren't exactly benevolent, but I have a feeling there's a whole lot going on here that we don't understand yet, and whatever society is sending its pokémon out after legendaries, it's quite justified in doing so in its own way. It's cool to see that plot thread beginning to connect with our main POV characters! And Haru's headache, hmm... something the girafarig was doing to her, presumably? Seems like someone tried to lay the same thing on Umbra.

I was a little confused why Haru's still going to be coming along on the shrine expedition. It seems like her presence there is going to complicate things, and the ostensible reason she'd be coming along, to guide the party, is no longer necessary with Vale there, right? Or has Vale never been to the shrine? It would seem convenient enough to tell her nvm, we found another guide, feel free to stay home at this point. Susana's reason for revealing herself to Haru was a little unclear to me as well. Like, she's intrigued by Haru's dislike of the gods, and the team wants her help, but it seems like the zoroark reveal would be as likely to scare Haru off as convince her to help; I wasn't sure why Susana decided to show herself there rather than trying to convince Haru to help out while posing as a cute, relatively harmless little charmander. I was also kind of perplexed that the whole team were such bad actors when confronted by Umbra and Vale. Like, it's mentioned that they seem to not know what to do in this situation, but... surely they expected this exact sort of sitation to crop up, right? How have they not rehearsed this?

Great closer on the most recent chapter, though! I enjoyed the little glimpse we got of him earlier, through Haru's eyes (though Haru, I stg, leave the guy alone. I do not believe your whole "I just can't stand him" schtick!), and the fact that he's clearly taking Celebi's visit hard. Understandable that he'd have some real soul-searching to do if he can't even rely on Yveltal's teachings anymore, especially as flimsy justification for the baby murder. It looks like we're having a proper inciting incident here, with Umbra burning down the jail and the action presumably about to shift to Regigigas' shrine--which feels like a real nexus now. Something big has got to happen up on that mountain, and I'm super here for it!

I really enjoyed the Titan's Harvest extra. Haru here is a fun contrast to the much more straight-laced bidoof we see in the fic proper. In combination with Haru's memory in the most recent chapter--I take that as being an actual memory, not a vision?--one starts to get the sense of the Regigigas expedition as a real turning point in Haru's life, one that left her far more closed off and untrusting than she had been before. Like, it sounds as though she may have seen Catkin on the brink of death? Big yikes. The information we've learned throughout this arc about the Regigigas expedition have been super interesting to me; they really reinforce the feeling of Theran Village as the quaint small town with a dark secret. So much of the way the village is today seems to have been shaped by that expedition several years ago, and it's super interesting to me. It feels like something where the truth must come to light soon, with no-doubt explosive consequences... very hype for it, tbh. There's some fun tension in being able to see a more complete picture than any of the characters here (except perhaps Jhorlo); they're starting to realize they've got a real storm coming, but they don't even know, oho.

Of course, there's that other dark secret that underlies all "civilized" pokémon society, the meat-eating thing and the various horrifying ways it's been handled. To me it seems like what really went down with the Regigigas expedition is likely to be the core component of the initial Theran Village arc, and then that broader question about the gods and why they made pokémon the way they did (and where they went and why, etc.) are what's going to draw us into the larger story. If that's the case, I expect it to work pretty well... that would make Theran Village something of a microcosm of the broader issue and establish the story's themes while giving the characters sort of a "tutorial level" sort of experience. Jhorlo may have a lot of power within their little village, but he's nothing compared to what lives out in the broader world, making him a satisfying sort of narrative miniboss. I get the sense that we won't be sticking around Theran Village too much longer, one way or another; looking forward to how we transition into a broader narrative scope and excited to be tackling the mystery of the gods much more directly!

There continue to be loads of cool story facets exposed in these most recent chapters--it's really become clear how much is going on below the surface in Theran Village and how the various characters' lives are connected to one another in ways even they don't necessarily realize. If I had one criticism of this section of the fic, it's that it's another one with a lot of talking rather than doing--Muse and Whisper discuss what to do about Muse's vision, Muse and Lotte discuss what Muse needs to do about Shimmer, Muse and Toshi/Haru/Shimmer discuss what to do about Muse's vision, Umbra and Vale discuss what to do about Jhorlo, etc. Things are moving along as these conversations bring new information to light, but it does still feel like we're teetering closer and closer to big events but still getting a bit bogged down in dialogue and pokémon exchanging information. The dramatic irony is great, but I'm not sure if we need all of these scenes, or at least need all of them right now--do we need both the scene with Muse discussing her vision with Whisper andthe one where she brings it up with her friends, for example? Could the information revealed in the Whisper discussion mostly be revealed in the scene with Haru et. al, and if it's significant that Whisper also knows about it, Muse could drop in there that Whisper's the only other person she's confided in? Given the direction this arc is taking, is now necessarily the best time for characters to discuss Muse's romantic feelings? Etc.

On the whole, though, I'm not unsatisfied! This run of chapters delivered more of what I like to see out of this fic: morally gray characters with complex motivations all bouncing off one another, advancing their own agendas and holding their secrets tight to their chests with a tasty side-order of worldbuilding. It really feels like we're juuuuust at the point where the story picks up, at least to close out this arc, and I think that's going to be loads of fun! Good luck with your writing, and I'll be eagerly awaiting the payoffs to the questions you've been setting up for the past couple arcs. Just what awaits Haru and friends (slash enemies) up on that mountain? What's it going to mean for Theran Village and the past it's tried to bury? I can't wait to find out!
 

Ambyssin

Gotta go back. Back to the past.
Location
Residency hell
Pronouns
he/him
Partners
  1. silvally-dragon
  2. necrozma-ultra
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. dreepy
  6. mewtwo-ambyssin
Merry Blitzmas
Disclaimer: Reviews are generally stream of consciousness stuff. Feel free to take with a grain of salt or ignore them entirely.

7: #Bars
-Gotta admire Toshi's rigid commitment to his idealism even after getting badly hurt in the dungeon trek. That's the kind of youthful spirit one might expect at his age. It's also a funny meta contrast with his sister. Toshi's like the pokémon player who thinks every 'mon has value and usefulness and Haru is the "Well, no, us bidoof are trash for combat."
-Considering the previous conversation with Toshi about Haru's plans, yes, peace and quiet is definitely too much to ask for.
-Oh, they're planning all this infirmary? That seems very smart. /s
-Hot damn Nip really just laid out a bunch of reasons why he should keep the egg intact and then when "Nah jk." Going to be really hard to redeem his character after a move like that. Hopefully that's the point.
-ngl Nip getting chomped by a bruxish would've been deserved karma. Alternatively, dysentery from dirty dungeon water. It does feel a bit flimsy for Bruxi to say they don't take kindly to egg thieves but then still let Nip stay in the area anyway.
-lol I get the feeling most of the villagers would think Umbra's customs are just as strange as she finds theirs.
-Interesting conversation with the mayor there. I get wanted to find more meat and it's certainly one way to go about it, but Jhorlo feels a bit more... sinister here than prior chapters. I wonder if he actually has something else in mind and just wants a way to keep Umbra close at hand.

8: We interrupt this PMD fic to bring you... a subgame from Smash Bros. Classic mode?
-At least dying in her dream didn't kill her in real life :V
-Good choice on skipping a bunch of mundane dungeon crawling and keeping the ursaring encounter similarly short. Fs out for Yogi, though. Petrified in his prime. o7
-Considering some folks who've talked about legends in a religious way, dungeons being related to some sort of battle that likely involved them will be important down the line. That's my guess, anyway.
-Hey, look, they actually found Nip without too much troub— [cue a bunch of people crawling out of the woodwork] oh, nevermind. Glad it seems to stay anchored in Haru's perspective even while chaos presumably erupts around her and she gets Harudoken'd at Nip and they fall down into a pit.
-At least take Nip to dinner before you go biting his tail feathers. Sheesh. 😏
-I got a bit of a dark chuckle over Nip and Umbra trying to talk over each other to Haru. It gave me that sense of "I'm the real X!" "No, I'm the real X!" you get when you have copies in a standoff.
-The big thing I think the various groups uniting is missing is, well, talk about the egg. Presumably, Nip's still the only one who knows what happened and that was the whole reason they were searching for him. But they apprehend him and... no egg. Feels like it's something that should have been addressed immediately.

9: We now interrupt this PMD fic to bring you the third Phoenix Wright game, apparently.
-Lecha, sweetie, you heard them talking about it. You could've said something to someone about it. Don't go all "surprised pikachu face" on me now.
-OFF WITH HIS HEAD is not something I was expecting in a PMD fic. How very... Alice in Wonderland.
-Fletchinder must go, his planet needs him.
-Treating trials like some sort of town hall where anyone can get upset and whatnot is pretty brutal. The kind of thing that can evoke mob justice. There's hints of that in some of the murmurings, though nothing seems to get out of hand. I'm glad Nip offers a more concrete explanation and am also glad that the different cultural clashing elements are coming into play here. Though I do believe, as readers, we're supposed to feel that even if his tribe is dysfunctional, it doesn't justify his decisions.
-Oh my god they let the village vote on a sentence? Including children like Haru and Toshi? It really is mob justice. Toshi being the deciding vote makes me think this plan isn't going to end well and, after the conversation with Shimmer, Haru's going to look for any excuses for an "I told you so" moment.
-I thought with these names that this was somehow the canon PMD world, but maybe it isn't and the Expedition Society and Rescue Guild are just Easter eggs.

10: Oh no which bidoof is about to get broken
-Suddenly onion fairy! The Passage of Time makes me think of Chrono Trigger's Corridors of Time. But it looks like Onion will pay our village setting soon enough.
-If you can't do the time, don't do the crime, Nip. He hasn't learned anything if he's mouthing off to people about his food.
-"You don't know what Jhorlo would have voted." No, but the reader probably does. >:3
-Maybe Haru is taking things a bit personally, but I think it's perfectly reasonable for her to given what happened. Sure, she couldn't predict it, but it's hard to uncouple that chain of causality.
-Pretty funny that Shimmer's the one who manages to get under Umbra's skin the most. The Genki girl and prickly girl dynamic dialed up a bit.
-See? Even Lotte ships Shimmer and Muse. :^)
-I think I stand corrected on my thoughts earlier. Seems Jhorlo is quite different from Muse in the leadership department. To think he actually manipulated Umbra and twisted the situation around in a way that he could use to, technically, benefit the village and its status. Like, yeah, Umbra did herself no favors, but it is quite skeevy for him to hang a death sentence over her head like that. More like a mob boss than a proper mayor, if you ask me.

11: Really? I don't see any question marks. :P
-Hey, hey. This chapter said just a question. Not multiple. False advertising! 0/10!
-Serious question: if death and cruelty are facts of life, then why is Nip desperate to survive? Does he not see the hypocrisy in his own logic?
-"If there was something shady going on..." Oh, honey, you have no idea. I see why the previous chapter ended the way it did.
-Yes, it's true that Umbra isn't particularly likable, but it's not like Nip's doing much better. It's kind of like the opposite of "passing kindness along." Nip's passed on the cruelty he's received to other people, but there's that hypocritical logic at play to make it worse. He calls himself a runt, so by his own logic he should've realized by now he's not fit to be a proper predator and accepted Yveltal's comfort or something. If Haru was a more religious character, perhaps she would try to throw that idea back in his face. But she's so dismissive of it that she doesn't.
-I can't tell if giving us Nip's perspective is supposed to elicit sympathy or not. Because hearing him get insulted a bunch could do that, but the scene at jail ended with what sounded like an inner monologue where he didn't regret stealing the egg, so... no real sympathy points earned there.
-Oh, hey, look it's that icetales. Way to make an entrance, buddy. Now your fur's ruined. So very un-ninetales of you.

12: Nice alliteration XD
-Vale may not be in charge, but he certainly has charge. 🥁Looks like we're not getting any immediate answers for why Tempest is here, though. Too banged up. F.
-I'm telling ya, Shimmer and Muse have too deep of a dynamic to just be friends. Though the brief reminder of Shimmer's ESP feeling a lot of anger from Umbra has me wondering if, perhaps, Jhorlo intended to vote to rehabilitate Nip precisely so that he could manipulate Umbra into doing hunting for the village's meat supply. Would be rather cunning. Overall, though, at least Shimmer's finally second guessing her decision.
-A bidoof plush? No. Bad touch.
-Oh no Shimmer wants to deal with the Tempest situation. This can only end badly.
-I'll give Umbra points for her absolute dedication to killing Nip. That's all she's getting. Very single minded. XD
-Shimmer's really going through with this. Amazing.
-I guess that's one way to give us Tempest's backstory. A bit fragmented. Not in chronological order, either. Some of this I think I vaguely recall from Blacklight, like not truly being in Nip's tribe and instead a Kyurem-worshipping one. Didn't know that he had lost his father and mate in, presumably, some sorts of accident. Maybe a child, too, with that hesitation? Unless it's referring to something else. Unfortunate for him. Perhaps he saw Nip as a sort of... replacement for family that he lost and that's why he became Nip's mentor. About the only thing that springs to mind at the moment.

13: Actions
-Given ninetales tend to have some sort of spiritual and/or hypnotic powers in the anime, I would not be surprised if Tempest managed some sort of mind attack on Shimmer, even as she severed the connection. And that's why she gets KO'd. I don't care what Lecha says, I'm sticking with that theory. >:V
-So, is Tempest mute here... because of the attack that slashed him in the throat? I feel like he would've died from that kind of wound, even in a magical PMD world, but especially one where the healing is of lower power scaling. I'm not entirely clear on it.
-Nip continues to be as unhelpful as ever, I see.
-I do think Toshi's side of the argument reads a bit preaching and soapboxy with the Nip side of things. He has a bit of a point but he is perhaps being a bit too generous toward Nip. In a youthful naivete kind of way. He has more credibility when discussing the actual family stuff. Particularly because Haru wants to take over the family business, but she can be rather dismissive toward her own father.
-Very interesting that a stronger(?) psychic has, like, a radio comm system going with other psychics from other places. That's something that could easily get expanded on in the future.
-I do not envy Whisper's situation at all and I think between the opening prose and her restrained anger while talking to Tempest you do a good job conveying her struggle and the associated heartbreak over her circumstances. Yet she still has the clarity to follow the letter of the village's laws, which is equally impressive.

14: Only momentary? So what bad thing happens now?
-I don't think "Are you really going to pay him?" should be followed directly by Nip. It makes it sound like Nip's saying it, when I don't believe he is.
-Nip's going to keep bringing up this unsustainable scavenging thing until we find out what Umbra's doing, isn't he? XD
-The mention of a bag from Sweet makes me think Nip's close to getting the bag in the banner art for this fic. 🤔
-Nip made the same observation at the mention of a fletchling that I did. Though I see he's back at it with his hypocritical "death is eternal peace" logic. It really makes you wonder why he would still struggle as opposed to accepting that eternal peace. Though the backstory for Whisper is intriguing, especially since Anu kinda had a moment of weakness and let it slip out.
-... Oh, so now he's regretting his decision? What changed from chapter 11, I wonder?
-Wow, not even trying to hide Tempest's assailant from the reader. I guess it wasn't enough of a mystery to warrant doing that.
-Vale is a hunter, then. Looks like Nip truly was right about things not being sustainable. And Vale really is speaking of Jhorlo like he's a mafia don instead of a proper mayor. I'm sure these secrets will come to light eventually. It's only a matter of ti— oh, hi Celebi. Bye, Celebi. Fs out.

15: Didn't we already use this chapter title? Is the deja vu intentional?
-Ah, yes, our illustrious children opting to volunteer their time as guards. This can only end well. By which I mean terribly.
-I feel like Whisper's taking pity on Toshi. A bidoof would not be my choice for a guard unless I was truly desperate or I knew it had the power of God and anime on its side.
-Having seen Vale's true nature last chapter, I strongly doubt he wants to go to Jhorlo to talk about making different decisions. It's more likely he wanted an excuse to find Umbra and follow up on those plans of his he mentioned. Haru's just a means to an end, in that case.
-In all fairness, Nip, you've put in, like, the bare minimum effort up to this point, so it's hard to blame Haru for not being willing to extend you the benefit of the doubt. :V
-"Lately it feels like time has flown by." Oh, honey, you have no idea. In fact, I think he's overshot you a few times now.
-No, I'm with Haru, here. I swear Shimmer veers into "stalker with a crush" territory at times and I'm not sure if that's supposed to be for comedy's sake or not because it gets a bit uncomfortable. I wonder when Toshi will work up the nerve to say he doesn't like her like that. Because if he's not brave enough to do that, what makes him think he's brave enough to be an explorer? 🤔
-I know Roselei is probably based on the species name, but it's also close to roseli as in the berry type and I can't help but think it's appropriate for a berry farmer.

And crash landing onion is a good spot to end. Seems a greater scope plot will come into play. I do believe there is a lot of foundation for some big stuff spread throughout these chapters. I hope my guesses provided some amusement~
 

Namohysip

Dragon Enthusiast
Staff
Partners
  1. flygon
  2. charizard
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. sceptile
  6. marowak
  7. jirachi
  8. meganium
I think this is the second-to-latest chapter, "Susana," that I'll be reviewing here! Happy catnip! I think, overall, while the prose was good and the pacing was nice, the actual logistics and narrative framing of this chapter struck me as a little strange, especially since this seems to be coupled with a scope-broadening attempt of the narrative. More details to follow below with my stream of consciousness thoughts.

Always hard to tell if a Zoroark in a story can be trusted, huh? And choosing for it to be a Ghost one makes me wonder if that's particularly symbolic or not...

Small aside, but I was almost tempted to see a sentence or two describing how Zoroark's paw felt to Haru. Considering the claws and the size difference, it seemed like such a significant new sensation and cultural exchange for it to just be glossed over like that.

It is kind of odd that they would pick such a conspicuous form to take as a disguise, all things considered. And if they're being so used to this kind of trouble, it also seems odd that they would be so easy to read. Umbra and Vale figuring out this issue feels kind of contrived for that reason, as if they suddenly took levels of incompetence just for some drama. I recall from the previous chapter that this team was actually taken out of commission or otherwise captured; did these people do that to them, then, and took their place like changelings? Even then, it just seems too... conspicuous.

The power scaling here is also puzzling. Seasoned explorers or monsters of some kind from a country far away braving the seas—At first I thought they were regional variants, but some of those descriptions feel very off—being downed by Umbra and Vale?

This chapter was definitely a little weird in how it was composed. We are introduced to these newcomers and a new act with new characters show up, lots of weird things about them, but they're also... sort of immediately ensnared by two relatively primitive hooligans trying a political game over some revenge squabble? It feels... almost petty that we have this arc about researching the gods but we are still stuck with the Nip problem. I'd almost feel short changed if this is how it all gets involved in the Big Scope plot that's been hinted at. It's too early to tell, but I can't get a read on trajectory after this chapter, but not in a thrilling way but a confusing way.

I think, considering what led to this, I'd chalk it up to wobbly footing after the speed on the treadmill kicked up. Hopefully it'll get more graceful in future chapters.
 

Virgil134

PMD Writer
Partners
  1. sylveon
  2. weavile
  3. kommo-o
  4. noivern
  5. mothim
Heya, am back with my review for chapter 21 (though the threadmark still says 22). Time to finally get caught up:

Chapter 21

Her room was sparse; she'd never found much need for little trinkets and other specialty items. They were a waste of money. Though she had a shelf, it only held a few well-worn books and a couple old wood-whittled figures. She'd made one a few cycles back, part of a short-lived art experiment. The other was a gift from her grandfather.

I really like this description. What someone’s room is like can say a lot about a person, with Haru being no exception.

Was she going out of spite?

No. She was going to protect Toshi. That's all.

aa6b06aae6f708da10046c5acf85091a.png


Haru and Saku each took one of the ceramic plates and dunked them into the water.

Given that they’re just washing their dishes in a random stream next to their house, I hope for them there aren’t any Wildners who have done their business further upstream.
701630550720512120.webp


Before the end, he heard a voice.

You do not belong…

Whelp, that dream was definitely something. Can’t help but wonder if this was Nip processing his traumas rather than Yveltal actually reaching out to him through his dreams though.

Did Yeveltal even care

Mispelled Yveltal here.

Finally, Anu sighed. "Very well. I will see if I can convince him to leave without a fight." His attention turned to Nip. "Apologies. We will continue this conversation another time." With a rustle of fabric, he was gone.

Damnit Anu, you can’t trust Vale alone with Nip. You should known by now the guy obviously has it out for him.

She looked at them, frowning. "How am I supposed to use these, exactly?"

"It's not that difficult. Just stick one in the hole and turn until one of them unlocks the door." The charizard snorted smoke.

"Do not patronize me," Umbra snapped back.

Skorch must be really happy to be working with Umbra right about now.

Dawn light—freedom—was only a few bounds away.

Fire erupted on his back, his world exploding in agony.

Damn, so close to escaping. I actually thought for a moment that Nip was gonna get away here. Good thing for Umbra that Skorch isn’t as frustrated with her as I thought. Could have just let Nip walk and be like “Oh whoops, he managed to slip away”, given that Umbra is the one messing up after being given the chance to corner Nip and finish him (which was the bargain they made I believe).

"Hurry up and set a fire. All that screaming will have attracted someone. Then we run. Vale, you need to look injured, go to…"

Oh boy, I can already tell that this is gonna have quite the aftermath. Obviously this isn’t how Vale planned things and I can’t imagine Jhorlo will be too happy with the jails cells burning down. I hope Tempest will make it out alright, since he’ll be stuck in his cell as things are burning down.

Anyway, this was a pretty good chapter! Seeing Haru struggle with what to do was pretty interesting and I wonder if the fire at the jail cells will end up changing her mind in helping Susana and her team. While she might not know for certain that Skorch was involved with this, Theran Village is a small hamlet and in places like those people always tend to suspect outsiders first when things go bad.

Looking forward to when you update this story again to see how things will continue!
 
An important announcement (April fool's 2023)

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
Hello everyone, it is with great sadness that I must annouce that Places We Call Home is cancelled forever. :sadbees: There are just too many plotholes in this fic for me to continue on. I've decided instead to reboot this story under a new name. And this time you - yes, you - get to influence the story. Introducing Bidoof Quest, a threadventure about a young bidoof standing in her bedroom. Read it at the below link and make suggestions in the thread!

https://forums.thousandroads.net/in...quest-threadventure-suggestions-welcome.1398/
 
23: Pokemon on a Mission

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
Sorry for taking so long! My limited writing energy was occupied elsewhere. But it's good to be back. Onwards!

Pokemon on a Mission


H… help…

Shimmer stirred, still half-asleep, and blearily opened her eyes. Pale dawn light filtered through her window, painting patches of sunlight on the wooden floor and casting the rest of the room in a blue hue.

Something poked her in the back, rousing her further and making her aware of the warm, furry thing under her head. She rolled onto her side, catching a glimpse of Muse's face. A small part of her wanted to giggle as the absol twitched in her sleep, but sense overruled it as she caught a glimpse of her contorted face and remembered the night before. Muse's feeling of foreboding hadn't gotten any better. Shimmer had insisted on Muse sleeping here, hoping company might soothe her. Poor thing.

Rolling back over to face the window, Shimmer couldn't help but wonder what had woken her; usually, she didn't wake until the sun had risen fully. Had it been Muse's fidgeting? She couldn't help but feel like she was forgetting something.

Help!

A sudden burst of psychic energy, distant and weak, struck her mind. She gasped, bringing a hand up to her right horn. That must be what had roused her. Someone was trying to contact her. Someone who knew where to find her. And she had a sneaking suspicion she knew who.

And if he was contacting her, then…

She sprung to her feet, then leaned over to shake Muse awake. Before she could speak a word, the absol jerked awake and scrambled to her paws, eyes wild and hackles raised.

Muse took two gasping breaths before addressing the kirlia. "Shimmer? What's going on?"

"I'm not sure," Shimmer replied, uncharacteristically serious. "I think Tempest is trying to contact me. I don't know why. But I think something is really, really wrong." She threw her arms wide to emphasize her point.

Muse took another breath, this time deep and steadying. "Okay. Focus. We'll go down to the square to see what's going on. Grab my bags, please."

"Right." Pink psychic energy gathered around Shimmer's hand, her eyes glowing the same hue. A set of pink bags flew across the room, straps landing in her waiting palm. She secured one bag around her waist, then attached the other to a harness before strapping the whole setup around Muse's torso. She stuck one hand in the bag, feeling around to verify she had the basic supplies she might need, then raced out the door with Muse on her heels.

The villa sat on high ground, compared to the village square, at the top of a rise that offered a view of the rest of Theran. On a lazy day, Shimmer could sit outside beneath a sturdy magnolia tree, watching the villagers mill about without a care in the world.

But today, she had a clear view of a dark plume of smoke and licking flames billowing out of the jail, and of several pokemon racing toward it.

For a moment, Shimmer stared in wide-eyed shock, jaw hanging open. What could have caused this? Did her father know? She hesitated, knowing her father would be upset if she spied on him like a child, before letting her emotion sense spread out. As usual, Muse was a black hole. She could pick up a single, faint trace of someone in the villa, though it was hard to interpret their emotional signature from this far away.

A nudge from behind grounded her back in reality. Muse gave her a light headbutt. "We should get down there. Climb on my back. It'll be faster."

"O-oh. Right." Shimmer couldn't keep the tremble out of her voice, her usual cheery front shattered. She put her hands on Muse's side and vaulted up to straddle her back, clinging tightly to the absol's mane. "As quickly as you can."

Muse lurched forward, racing down the hill at full sprint. Wind whipped around Shimmer's face, her thick hair streaming behind. A moment later, they leveled out at the bottom of the hill, the panicked cries of villagers starting to reach Shimmer's ears. She squeezed her eyes shut, focusing on reigning in her emotion sense. Her grip on Muse's fur tightened, heart racing as she silently urged the absol to run faster.

Oh no oh no, please let everyone be okay!

By the time they reached the square, other pokemon were already fighting the flames. Saku and Chip spat streams of water from their reserves while Toshi flung globs of water from his tail. Nearby, she spotted the cubone from the meat shop slinging globs of dirt and mud at the base of the fire.

Shimmer sprang from Muse's back and took a few running steps forward, only to stop and turn back to the absol. She didn't have any water or ground moves. What was she supposed to do for help?

But before she could say anything, the sound of coughing made her whip back around toward the building.

Two figures emerged from the entryway, supporting each other. The first was Whisper, her feathers singed and sooty. One wing held a damp cloth to her beak. Leaning against her was Tempest, who looked even worse. The fur on parts of his flank had burned away, leaving exposed, blistered skin in an angry red hue. His eyes were dull, and his tails drooped as he limped forward.

The pair made it only a few steps further before Tempest shuddered and collapsed, taking deep, heaving breaths.

"Lecha!" Whisper croaked, her voice hampered by the smoke. "Lecha, quickly!"

"Coming!"

Shimmer turned just in time to see the aromatisse scurry away from an injured Vale, leaving him in the hands of her illumise assistant, Twi.

The stench of burnt fur wafted towards Shimmer; patches of Vale's fur had burned away, but his injuries were hardly worse than Whisper's. Next to him, Anu paced restlessly, his aura sensors quivering.

Lecha paused as she passed Shimmer. "You know how to use heal pulse. Right, Dear? Come, help me."

"R-right." Finally, something she could do. Something other than standing around uselessly. Shimmer stumbled after Lecha, rushing towards the fallen ninetales. By the time she reached him, healing energy danced at her fingertips. She focused, pushing the healing energy forward, aiming for the areas that looked the worst while Lecha elevated Tempest's head. With her free paw, she reached into a satchel, pulling out a couple rawst berries.

"I need you to try to eat these," she said to Tempest. "Do you think you're able to?"

Gingerly, Tempest took one of the berries between his teeth, biting into it, only to drop it as a coughing fit wracked his body.

Lecha let out a sigh, reaching into her bag again for a mortar and pestle. "Very well. I don't like using a topical treatment on burns, but it looks like the best choice here." She turned her head towards Whisper. "If you have any burns, you can get a berry from Twi. I'll be with you once I've finished treating him."

Whisper held up a wing. "Not yet. I have a situation I need to deal with." She looked back towards the guards' hut. Flames still licked at the timbers but were dying quickly under the onslaught of water. "I just woke up to my workplace on fire, one guard injured — not the one who, mind you, was supposed to be there — one prisoner trapped and critically injured, and one prisoner missing." She took a stumbling step towards Anu and Vale. "What in Regi's name happened here?"

One prisoner missing? Shimmer whipped her head about, scanning the small crowd for the oddly colored sneasel. Without thinking, she let loose her emotion sense, as if it might help her pinpoint him. But he was a dark type. Even if he were here, she wouldn't have sensed him. She did, however, pick up the general anxiety of the gathered pokemon, and a surprisingly strong spike of the same from Vale.

"It was one of those explorers," Vale grunted, teeth bared. "I don't know if she acted alone, but I suspect not. Anu left to deal with another one at the temple. Then the charizard attacked while he was gone. She knocked me out. When I came to, the whole place was on fire and she was making her escape with Nip."

"What?"Whisper puffed out her feathers, hitting Shimmer with a sharp pang of shock.

Anu hung his head. "I knew there was something wrong with those explorers. Something about their aura was just… wrong. And the fact that the zoroark was parading around as a charmander… But for them to attack a guard… I should have paid closer attention to their credentials. I'm sorry, Whisper."

The hawlucha's expression softened. "Dear, this isn't your fault—"

"And Nip!" Anu flattened his ears against his skull, tail tucked between his legs. "I really thought I was getting through to him… Please don't sugarcoat this, Whisper. I could have prevented this. I've failed this community."

Shimmer frowned, bracing herself against the waves of disappointment and regret that rolled off Anu. She didn't expect a sudden flash of anger from nearby.

He's lying.

She knew that psychic signature. She snapped her head to stare intently at Tempest. The ninetales struggled, trying to stand, only to slump back to the ground, panting.

"Stop that!" Lecha chided. "You're in no condition to move."

He's lying, Tempest repeated in her mind. Umbra was here. Umbra brought the charizard. He was in on it.

What?
Shimmer sent the word back without meaning to. She could believe that Umbra was somehow involved. But… but Tempest's story couldn't be right. Vale was a good mon. He was always hanging around the villa, helping her dad out with odd jobs. He could be gruff, but he only had the village's best interests at heart.

Right?

But if Umbra was involved, why didn't Vale say so? How could he miss her involvement? And what would Tempest have to gain by lying? It was possible he was covering for Nip. But if Nip had abandoned him to die in a fire, why would he still be loyal?

Her mind raced through the possibilities, trying to decide what to do. Who to believe. Should she try to read their thoughts? Her dad always told her not to, and they would definitely notice an inexperienced mind reader like her, but maybe…

Please. Tone was difficult to discern through a psychic voice, but she could feel the desperation emanating from the ninetales. I can't lose him again.

"What do you mean the explorers were involved?"

Toshi's panicked voice cut through the haze. Shimmer's gaze followed the bidoof as he scrambled to a stop in front of Whisper, his eyes wide and fur ruffled.

"Haru said she's supposed to be with them. What if they tricked her? What if they hurt her? We have to do something!"

Sudden clarity hit Shimmer as she took a deep breath. Something didn't add up here. And she would be the one to get to the bottom of it.

Giving Muse a quick pat on the shoulder to get her attention, Shimmer sauntered over to the group surrounding Vale.

"They didn't say anything about where they were headed, did they?" Whisper asked.

Vale hesitated. Shimmer felt more waves of anxiety. "No, I'm afraid not. Not while I was alert, at least."

"Haru said she was helping them set up a base…" Toshi mumbled. "Maybe they're in the forest. Maybe we could catch up to them?"

"We have reason to doubt their character," Anu pointed out. "There's no reason to believe that story is true."

"Maybe we can track them?" Whisper suggested. "Only one of them could fly, so they couldn't have all escaped by air. There should be some scent trail to pick up on."

She needed to speak up. She needed to speak up now before everyone ran off without the full story. "Heyyy, Valey," Shimmer chimed in with a sing-song tone. "You didn't happen to see anyone else in the attack, did you?"

Was that fear she sensed? "No, just the charizard."

Shimmer giggled. "That's funny." She let the statement hang in the air for a few heartbeats while she played with her hair. "Because Tempest said Umbra was there, too. And that would change the situation significantly, don't you think?"

Vale glared at her. This time, she was certain she felt a spike of fear. "Quit joking around, Shimmer. This is serious! Haru could be in danger. And that ninetales cannot talk."

She giggled again. "Silly Vale, of course he can. He just doesn't have any interest in talking to you."

All eyes were on her, now. Perfect. Just how she liked it. Whisper's gaze was fiercest of all.

"Shimmer, if you know something, then just say it. We don't have time for cryptic statements."

Holding in a sigh, Shimmer waved one hand in a circle. "You know how psychics can communicate with others if they know roughly where the other is? Or how they can project thoughts into someone else's mind? Turns out ninetales have some innate psychic ability. So I've been teaching Tempest how to speak with his mind!"

"You've been—" Whisper cut herself off, ruffling her feathers. She turned to the ninetales. "Is this true?"

While Shimmer couldn't hear anything — she doubted Tempest could project into multiple minds at his skill level — the way Whisper's eyes widened and her beak hung open told her everything she needed to know.

Small sparks danced across Vale's pelt. "Are you seriously going to believe that? Even if he can talk, we know he's loyal to Nip! He's probably just trying to buy time to let the bastard escape. I bet Umbra is still up at the villa."

Was she? Shimmer tried to think back. Had she picked up on Umbra's emotions? She didn't think so. She only remembered picking up one emotional signature. But she had to be certain. Turning to Muse, she asked, "Could you run check, please? Get Dad as well, if you see him. He needs to know about… all this." She waved her hand in the direction of the smoldering hut.

The absol dipped her head. "Anything for you." Then she turned and sprinted back up the road.

"I'm not sure what that's supposed to prove," Vale growled. "Even if Umbra wasn't there, that doesn't mean she's here."

"That's true," Whisper admitted. "But you were supposed to keep an eye on her."

Shimmer turned back to Vale, changing the subject. "Now, now, you heard what Toshi said. Haru is supposed to be with those explorers that took Nip. I know Haruru, and she would never help Nip escape." She took a step closer. "And while she doesn't like him, I highly doubt she would help Umbra with anything, either. Not after she threatened to kill Toshi."

Vale gritted his teeth. "Maybe you don't know her as well as you think you do. You don't exactly endear yourself to her, princess."

Shimmer's eyelid twitched. Seriously? Vale was usually rude, but not this rude!

Before she could come up with a witty reply, Toshi butted in.

"Excuse me?" he squeaked, marching towards the manectric. "That is my sister you're talking about. How dare you suggest she's in cahoots with these… these… pretenders! I don't care if they were helping Nip or helping Umbra. Either way, she could be in danger and you're here arguing trivialities instead of trying to help!"

Toshi drew back his lips to fully bare his incisors. "Are you going to help us find my sister? Or are you just going to waste our time?"

Vale sparked, ears flat against his skull as static rippled across his flanks. But his expression betrayed unease. After a moment, he looked away. "I'm telling you. Umbra was not here. The charizard was helping Nip escape. But… I did hear the word 'mountain' when they fled."

"That makes a degree of sense," Anu said, pawing at his nose. "They've been trying to get me to take them up to the old shrine for days. Though it still doesn't explain Nip. As far as I know, they never interacted with him… But they did definitely try to lure me away from my post."

"It's a lead," Whisper concluded with a wave of one wing. "I'll gather up some supplies and leave immediately. Lecha, could you part with some oran berries? Possibly some aspear and rawst, as well. I suspect most of my supply was ruined."

The aromatisse looked up from her work on Tempest. "Of course, dear. Twi, could you please fetch some?"

You got it!" The illumise gave a messy salute, then buzzed off back towards the medic hut.

"I'm coming with you!" Toshi announced, taking a step towards Whisper.

The hawlucha tilted her head. "That's kind of you to offer, but—"

"My sister could be in danger! I'd never forgive myself if something happened to her while I stayed back here and did nothing."

"We'll come too," Shimmer chimed in. "Musey and me."

Now Whisper's attention was on her. "This isn't a game. These pokemon are dangerous, and we don't know how powerful they are."

"You allowed Muse and me to help watch Nip and Tempest. And you're going to need all the help you can get, right?"

"This is different! Your volunteer guard duty was in a controlled environment. There's more at stake here."

Shimmer crossed her arms and stuck out her lip, glaring. "Well, who can you trust to bring instead? Vale?"

Whisper returned the glare for a moment longer, then sighed and turned away, flapping her wings. "You three are going to follow along if I don't let you come anyways, aren't you? Fine. But you have to listen to everything I say."

"I… I will come as well," Anu said. "It is my duty. Romi and the others can cover things here until we return. And if they hear any additional information that suggests we need to look elsewhere, Romi is the best mon to catch up to us."

I want to come as well. Tempest's voice entered Shimmer's head. He must have contacted Whisper just after, as they both turned towards him.

"Absolutely not," Whisper said. "Your condition is too bad for you to travel, as I'm sure Lecha will agree. And I still cannot guarantee you are telling the truth. If the explorers helped Nip escape, I don't trust you to help stop him. You will stay here."

She tilted her head in Vale's direction. "And that goes for you, too. Until we get to the bottom of this, you are to stay in Lecha's hut. Do. Not. Leave."

Sparks danced on Vale's back as he let out a growl, but he lowered his head submissively.

"Good. I'll see what I can scrounge up from the ashes. We should still have a nullify looplet. I hope it survived the flames. Anu, get rations from Meaad. Tell him it's an emergency and we'll pay it back after we return."

Toshi scurried off to speak with his parents as Whisper approached the burnt building. At the same time, racing pawsteps alerted Shimmer to Muse's return. The absol collapsed on the ground in front of her, panting. "She's… she's not there… Jhorlo… coming…"

Shimmer shot Vale an accusatory glance. This whole situation reeked.

"That doesn't prove anything!" the manectric growled. But he didn't look at Shimmer as he shuffled off to the medic hut.

Suppressing a sigh, Shimmer turned to fill Muse in on the plan. The absol shot her a distressed glance. But she didn't try to argue. She didn't have a chance to, as Whisper returned with a few items in wing. She handed a few berries, an orb that Shimmer thought might be a petrify orb, and a heal seed. Anu returned a moment later, bag laden with food.

"We'll properly sort things out as we go," Whisper said, standing a bit straighter. "Lecha can explain the situation to Jhorlo whenever he gets here. Let's move out."

She took the lead, marching out of the square at a brisk pace with Anu just behind, stopping only to collect more berries from Twi. Toshi dashed over to meet them, ignoring a call from his mother. Shimmer took just a heartbeat to lift Toshi onto Muse's back. The bidoof clung tight to her fur, shooting a grateful glance. He'd struggle to keep pace with everyone else on foot, she suspected. But she could manage.

Oh, Haru, Shimmer thought as they raced out of the square. Now look what you've gotten yourself into.


The palest beginnings of dawn light crept above dark treetops, casting the surrounding forest in a dark, blue hue. Haru yawned as she padded down the path toward the mountain trail, feeling the brush of her bags against her back. This was early, even for her. But the sooner she took the explorers up the mountain, the sooner she could get back.

Up ahead, she caught sight of Susana — currently in her charmander disguise — and the girafarig conversing. But where were the other two?

Susana looked up, caught her eye, and waved a hand. "Over here!"

Waddling down the path as quick as she could, Haru dipped her head in greeting. "Good morning. I… thought we were in a hurry. Where are the others?"

"Topaz forgot some of our supplies and had to run back for them," the girafarig answered. "And Skorch is feeling under the weather. Probably ate something that didn't agree with her. She'll catch up later if she starts feeling better. She can fly, and she has a rough idea of where we're heading."

"O-oh, okay," Haru answered. Then a thought occurred to her. If Skorch could just fly up to the shrine, why do you need me to guide you?

Then she remembered that the path was no longer well-traveled, and was likely obscured by bushes and wild grass. It would be difficult to guide someone if you weren't familiar.

And, fortunately, she was familiar enough. Even if it had been many, many seasons since she'd been to the old shrine.

"Would it be better if we waited until she feels better?" she asked. "Having eyes in the sky could be useful if we run into trouble."

Susana shook her head quickly. It took Haru a few heartbeats to figure out the meaning of the unfamiliar gesture. "No, no, I understand your concerns. But we're on a strict timeline. We can't afford to spend any more time waiting around."

Haru supposed she couldn't argue with that. While things weren't so strict here, she imagined schedules in bigger towns, and for organizations as huge as the expedition society, were different.

She was spared from continuing the conversation by the sound of racing pawsteps.

"Ah, there he is." Susana waved a claw, then pointed in the direction of the pawsteps. Haru turned to see the raichu racing up the path. He skidded to a stop, panting.

"Sorry I'm late. But I got the goods." He held up a cloth bag.

"Thank you, Topaz," Susana replied. She took the bag and tied it to a large pack on Remer's back before turning her attention to Haru. "Well then, we should be off."

"R-right." Haru sucked in a deep breath, stealing one last glance down the path. Her heart thudded hard against her chest, pounding fast with anticipation. She could still back out of this, right now. No, remember why you're doing this, she thought to herself.

She turned to point a paw at a fork in the path that led into thicker vegetation. "We'll need to head this way."

The group set off, Haru in the lead. As the ground sloped up, it didn't take long for the route's disuse to show itself; the undergrowth here was less tended-to, overgrown bushes taking up half the path in parts, grass springing up between dirt and stone. Early in the journey, before the sun had risen fully, they came across a fallen tree blocking the path, its trunk covered in spongy moss. While the three explorers leaped or clamored over it without issue, Haru was forced to push through a thick bush and weave between the chaotic tangle of roots to get around.

While the journey was silent for a time, it wasn't long before Susana started trying to make conversation.

"So, Haru, what's this shrine like?" she asked. "I mean, we've heard a few descriptions, but we've never seen it for ourselves."

"Prepare yourselves for disappointment," Haru answered. "It was already falling into disrepair before the village quit visiting about fifteen cycles ago. I imagine it's even worse now. What could be moved was already taken down to the village a while ago."

"Really? I shouldn't be surprised, I suppose." Susana scratched at her cheek. "Still, I'm sure there's things there that couldn't be brought down that we may find useful. Carvings, paintings, and statues. Information. Speaking of which… you don't happen to know any strange or unusual stories. You know, legends that wouldn't be well known outside of your village?"

Haru sighed, her head drooping before she paid attention to her surroundings again, stumbling around a crumbling hole in the middle of the path. "Nothing that Anu couldn't tell you."

"Sure, sure," Susana said, waving one hand, "but I want to know your version. What were you told? How do you remember it? You seem to have a different perspective on things than someone like Anu would."

Her version? Haru didn't want to talk about her version. But Susana wasn't going to shut up unless she did. She grumbled, then began. "Well, there's plenty of stories about how Regigigas formed our continent, moved the pieces together to create mountains, and pulled them apart to create rivers and valleys. There's stories about his three sentries, spread out across the land to protect other followers, and garnering followers of their own. And there's stories of the Banished Ones, the two failed creations lost somewhere beyond the sea."

Another grumble escaped her as she ducked to squeeze under an overgrown holly. "Some pokemon think his resting place is deep within the heart of Mount Domo, but I think that's stupid. Even if he is there, for a mon that's supposed to be protecting his followers, he sure did a lousy job. I have my doubts he ever even existed. Or cared, if he did exist."

The girafarig, Remer, sped up to walk beside Haru. "I can't help but notice something troubling you, Haru. Do you want to talk about it?"

Haru felt a headache coming on. She sped up. "My reasons for distrusting gods are, frankly, none of your business."

"My apologies." Susana hurried to catch up and stand at Haru's other side. "Please excuse Remer. He means well."

Haru shot the girafarig a glare. "Anyway, my point is that there's no way for us to know how true any of these stories are. Even if the gods are real, the stories have probably been distorted after hundreds upon hundreds of cycles being retold."

"There is… one way you could find out," Topaz interjected.

Pausing mid-step to glance back at the Raichu, Haru tilted her head. "What are you talking about?"

"I get what he's saying." Susana reached for her Expedition Society badge. She ran her claws across the metallic surface. "Think about it like this. If we could just… find one of these gods. Talk to them. They'd know the truth about what happened all those years — I mean cycles — ago. And imagine what we could do if we just… could get them to do our bidding. We could reshape the world. Make it fairer. Imagine reaching out to the mother of all life, Mew, and having her change the way pokemon work so that no pokemon is obligated to eat meat to survive. Or if she created some lower life form so that we didn't have to hunt other sapient creatures."

She spun to face Haru, her eyes gleaming. "Wouldn't that be great?"

Haru shifted uncomfortably, off-put by her sudden excitement, before starting to walk again. "Well… yeah, it could be great." Then she thought of the encounter with Celebi, and she couldn't help but let out a snort. "But good luck convincing them to do anything. I bet a bunch of them have gone mad, given how old they'd be."

Susana didn't try to argue further, and the group lapsed into silence again. The sun slowly climbed high into the sky as they worked their way through the undergrowth, stopping only once for a brief break before continuing their marathon. Occasionally, the monotony of the trip was broken by quiet conversations between the explorers, but Haru kept out of it.

The sun had nearly reached its zenith by the time Susana called for a second break, this time for lunch, in a small, grassy clearing along the path. To their left, the ground sloped upwards, a tree line a short distance up the hill. To the right, a rocky lip protected them from falling down a short, but steep, incline, scraggy bushes clinging between cracks in the stone.

Haru sank gratefully to the ground as Susana began passing out rations: dried meat sticks for herself, and apples and carrots for the rest of the group. As everyone settled down to eat, she pulled a ceramic dish and a waterskin from the supplies on Remer's back, filled the dish with water, and set it in the middle for everyone to share.

Taking a bite from an apple, Haru closed her eyes, enjoying the weak warmth of the autumn sun. Her family would need to start preparing winter rations soon. They still had half a season, but the weather could change fast. A healthy stock of wood and dried fruit would do them well.

Susana tore a bite from her own meal, jaws snapping as she did her best to chew and break it down. Haru couldn't help but cringe and hastily looked away. At least the meat was so processed that it didn't look like anyone anymore.

Just a moment later, the disguised zoroark addressed Haru.

"So, Haru, how much longer do you think it'll be before we reach the shrine?"

Glancing up at the sky, Haru squinted. It wasn't sun-high quite yet. She looked at her surroundings, trying to pick out anything familiar. Her attention turned towards the downward slope. She approached, climbing up on the stone so she could look over. A good ways below, she could make out a patch of blurry colors that she thought was Theran Village.

"We're definitely over halfway there. It shouldn't be too much longer…"

Susanna bobbed her head and opened her mouth to say something more, only to suddenly snap it shut and stare intently at Remer. The girafarig was stiff, eyes wide and boring into the tree line. Haru's heart raced as she stood, following his gaze. She could hear the sound of rustling bushes, now, coming closer fast.

"What's going on?"

Before any of the explorers could answer, the nearest bushes rustled, then a figure burst free and stumbled down the slope towards them.

They'd clearly seen better times; their fur was bushed up, eyes wide and wild, and breathing ragged. Dried blood coated their cheek, and the scent of charred flesh and fur wafted from them. Their claws were bound together in thick rope. A second length of rope twisted around their ankles, tight enough to restrict movement but loose enough that they could still run — if barely.

More importantly, though, Haru recognized the pokemon. And she couldn't fathom any reason he would be here.

"Nip?!"
 
24: The Choice

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
The Choice


Nip stirred, waking. His head — no, his whole body — ached, dulling his senses. But as he struggled awake, he became aware of wind whipping around him, tugging at his fur. Amidst the pain, the sensation felt distant. Something sharp dug into his sides.

He peeked one eye open just a crack, trying to process the sensations, trying to figure out their cause. Had he overworked himself? Then his mind caught up with what he was seeing, and he snapped to full alertness.

He hung limply from two thin, scaly arms, occasionally bobbing as trees — many turning gold and red and brown — rushed by several body lengths below. All at once, his last memories came racing back. Umbra. Vale. The strange charizard. Tempest's distraction. His failed escape.

Struggling against the wind, he tilted his head slightly and squinted. That same charizard was the pokemon carrying him now, her talons digging tightly into his torso, but holding him away from her body. She was speaking, but her words were snatched away by the wind. He could just make out another voice as well: Umbra's.

He was as good as dead. Umbra had him in her clutches. She won. There was no way she would drag him all the way back to the tribe. As soon as she had the chance, she'd end his life.

And even if, by some miracle, she did take him all the way back to the Tribe (not home, he reminded himself, no longer home) the outcome would be the same.

He hung his head, despair threatening to overwhelm him. Had he always been destined to die at her hands? Was he cursed by Yveltal? Damned as a wretched creature? Or did Yveltal not care for him at all?

No.

His heart fluttered as one last hopeful thought danced in his head.

He wasn't dead yet. And that meant he still had a chance, small as it might be. All he needed to do was find a way to escape. And he had one idea.

In one jerking motion, he twisted around in the charizard's grip. His claws were inaccessible at the moment, bound tightly together. But he could still get his mouth around her arm. He bit down with all his might, teeth sinking deep into flesh. The iron taste of blood welled on his tongue.

She jerked her arm free. And all at once, he was plummeting towards the trees.

His brain barely had time to process his descent before twigs and leaves grabbed at him. Pain blossomed across his chest and the wind was driven from his lungs as a branch broke his fall. Then he slipped off and landed, stunned, on the forest floor.

He coughed, gasping, as horrible pain throbbed in his chest. Had he broken a rib? It wasn't an outlandish assumption, given the fall, but he hoped with all his heart that he hadn't.

Please, Yevetal, he silently prayed, if you have any favor left for me, let me get out of this alive.

Ignoring the painful protests of his whole body, he rolled onto his side, dragging himself with bound claws under a nearby bush to hide. It wasn't a permanent hiding place, and it wouldn't be effective once his captors landed — and knowing Umbra, they would land — but it gave him a moment of reprieve to think.

Hadn't this happened before? Him, battered and burned and an inch from death, hiding deep in the undergrowth from someone who wanted to kill him? What were the chances?

No, focus, he chided himself. Shaking his head to clear the thought, he turned his attention to his bindings. His wrists were tightly bound together in front of his torso. His legs, too, but they were looser. Enough for him to hobble along, even — though he'd never be able to run.

Start there. The claws could come if he had time, but he needed to be able to run. Sucking in a breath to endure the pain, he twisted until he hooked one claw into the knot around his leg, tugging and twisting until it came loose. At least, loose enough to give more slack to the rope. He should be able to run like that, almost at full sprint.

A crashing sound from branches above startled him, and he sprang to his feet with fur puffed out. Something thumped onto the ground, followed by a quieter thump.

"He must still be nearby," Umbra's voice shot cold fear through his heart. "It still reeks of him. Do you understand now why I wanted him dead first?"

"He's cunning, I'll give you that," the charizard replied. "But in his state, he won't get far."

Dread twisted Nip's stomach. He was out of time. Any heartbeat now, Umbra would spot the marks where he dragged himself, or properly pick up his scent trail. Or maybe she'd have the charizard flush him out with fire. He'd deal with the rest of his bindings later, but he had to move now.

Keeping low to the ground, he dragged himself deeper into the undergrowth as quietly as he could, trying to disguise his noise amongst the sound of wind in the leaves. As soon as he was on the far side of the bushes, he forced himself to his feet, fighting nausea. Crouching lower than the bushes, he crept further away, casting glances and swiveling his ear back to listen and make certain he was moving away from his pursuers.

"Look, there's blood here," he heard Umbra say. "And see these scratches in the dirt? He was just here."

"So he couldn't have gotten far," the charizard concluded. "Which means…"

He didn't dare look back again, afraid he'd come face-to-face with the fire-breather. But their voices were growing quieter. He was moving faster than they were. Just a bit further, then maybe —

Something snapped beneath his paw.

Nip froze. The sound of the breaking twig wasn't that loud. But to his strained payche, it sounded louder than a seed bomb.

And unfortunately for him, Umbra's hearing was her best sense.

"That way!" The sound of someone barreling through the undergrowth in his direction followed Umbra's exclamation.

No more time for stealth. Gritting his teeth, Nip dashed further into the forest, running as quickly as his bindings and injuries would allow. Distance. Gaining distance was all that was important right now. Bushes and brambles tugged at his fur as he ran, and he fought the urge to yowl in pain as he trod on a thorn. But adrenaline pushed him through the pain, pushed him to run faster, pushed him to duck through paths that others might not be able to take.

But the problem with something big and powerful like a charizard was that it could make its own path, and Nip could hear her gaining on him.

Suddenly, he burst free from the undergrowth onto a dirt path winding through the woods. The local wildeners must use this — that was his best guess for such a well-maintained trail. While it wouldn't present obstacles to his assailants, it was bound to lead somewhere. Hopefully somewhere safer.

He stumbled down the path, fallen leaves crunching and squelching beneath his paws. Any other time he would find the changing colors beautiful. But right now, he was focused only on escape.

Paths like these usually led to rivers or gathering spots or other landmarks where he might find help. Or perhaps even…

As he pushed through some overgrown bushes, the last thing he expected was to emerge into open air and come face-to-face with a group of pokemon. Three of them — a charmander, a girafarig, and a raichu — were unfamiliar. But the last pokemon was someone he'd grown accustomed to seeing, and one he'd never expected to run into somewhere like here. And though his chances of receiving help from her seemed slim, with nowhere else to run or hide he had a feeling she was his only hope of getting out of this alive.

Haru stared at him, eyes wide and jaw hanging. It took her precious seconds to find her voice. "Nip?"


Haru struggled to make sense of Nip's appearance. What was he doing here? And in such a ragged state, no less? And alone. Where were the guards? None of this made sense!

The sneasel took a step forward, eyes wild and panicked. "P-please," he stuttered, casting a glance to the woods behind. Something else was crashing towards them, the sound making Haru's heart race. She took a stumbling step backward, legs stiff as he continued. "Umbra and a charizard, they attacked the guards' hut. They took me. They. They hurt Tempest. I don't even know if he's alive. I got away but they're still after me." He glanced into the woods again before turning to take another step, staring at Haru. "Please, help."

Haru struggled to process his plea. Umbra and… a charizard? Skorch? Before she could ask for more information, another pokemon crashed through the bushes just behind Nip, who raced towards her, his fur bushed.

A lone mawile emerged, though Haru could still hear rustling, suggesting there was at least one other pokemon waiting in the woods. Haru took an uneasy step back, her gaze shifting back and forth between Nip and Umbra.

Nip said she was with a charizard. While Nip might have been lying, the timing was awfully convenient. Skorch wasn't here. She'd stayed back in the village because she was sick, right? But if she was helping Umbra, then… Haru glanced at Susana, but her disguise gave nothing away.

"There's nowhere left to run, Nip," Umbra said, taking a step forward. Nip, in turn, took a step back, ear flat against his skull and teeth bared. "Accept your fate. Accept justice."

"This was never about justice!" Nip shouted back, though there was no hiding the fearful quiver in his tone. "If you cared about justice, things never would have reached this point!"

Umbra narrowed her eyes. "No one forced you to commit treachery. You dug your own hole."

Nip's eyes darted back and forth as if looking for a way out. "I… I can't deny that, but… But you still can't absolve yourself of guilt when you spent seasons upon seasons to make me break!"

Haru uneasily turned to Susana, trying to drown out the shouting match for a moment. "Aren't you going to do something about this?"

The false charmander tilted her head, expression unreadable. "Why should we?"

Why should they? "You're Explorers!" Haru sputtered, incredulous. "Someone's asking you for help. Aren't you supposed to, you know, break it up and get an idea of what's going on?" As far as she knew, Enforcers usually handled this kind of situation, but explorers and rescuers could step in in an emergency like this. Right?

And though she was hesitant to help Nip, she doubted Susana's team knew anything about his crime. Even if they did, this wasn't the will of the village.

But Nip mentioned a charizard. The thought circled around her head again. Was Skorch really involved?

Susana let out a long sigh, her expression turning bored. "Remember our agreement, Umbra."

Nip was shouting something, but at Susana's words, it died in his throat. He stared at Susana, while Haru's attention turned towards Umbra.

"Agreement?" Haru started. "What are you talking about?"

"We spoke to Umbra and another pokemon yesterday. They asked us to take care of this sneasel here for his crimes. I apologize for not telling you, but it was purely Explorer business."

"Take care of… N-now hold on. I apologize, but Umbra here isn't law enforcement. She doesn't have the jurisdiction to hand Nip over to you guys. And this isn't an incorporated village. You can't just come here and do what you want without proper approval from our Mayor or the head of the guard."

"Is she not?" Susana asked. "Well, she was with a manectric. Vale, I think his name was?" Her charmander mouth twisted into a smile, an expression that looked off. Threatening, almost. "Haru, relax. This is all by the books. Just let us do our job. If you're really concerned about it, then you don't have to be involved. Once we reach the shrine, I can have Skorch take you home."

Haru's heartbeat accelerated. If Vale was there, then it was possible that this was by the books. But something didn't add up. She stole a glance at Nip, the sneasel frozen in wide-eyed terror. She shook out her fur. "I-I'm sorry. Vale is involved in local law enforcement, but he's not in charge. If things changed and you guys are turning Nip over to the enforcers—" She hesitated. If Umbra was involved, she doubted that was the case. "If you guys are turning him in, then I need to know that Whisper okayed this. I-I think we should head back."

Susana hesitated, her expression distant for a moment, as if paying attention to something else. Then she smiled again. "The hawlucha, right? Of course she okayed it. We wouldn't be doing this otherwise, right?"

Of course. The thought entered Haru's head. Susana's been trustworthy so far. "I…"

But the charizard. Nip had said the charizard attacked. He could be lying, but it didn't make sense. Why would Umbra be here if they were really turning him over? The charizard attacked. The charizard attacked.

She shook her head, trying to focus with a splitting headache. She had a decision to make. If she went along with this, then her village would wash their hands of Nip, and no one would have to worry about being threatened by him again. He was guilty. He'd hurt not just them but the pokemon he'd lived with before. He wasn't deserving of mercy.

On the other hand, she thought back to her brother. Her… not really her friends, but her peers, Shimmer and Muse. She thought back to that time in the forest when Nip had saved her brother from the wildener quilava. How would the person she cared for the most react if she just stood by and let this happen? Could she live with his disappointment?

Was this really just? Could she live with herself if it wasn't?

Of the second and third questions, she was uncertain. But she knew the answer to the first. And it made her decision.

"I-I'm sorry," Haru stuttered, taking a step back. She was keenly aware of the rock wall behind her, the drop on the other side, and how much danger she might be in. "I can't abide by this. We aren't an incorporated village, and you can't just come here, ignore our rules, and boss us around. I'm happy to help you get to the shrine, but I will not take you any further unless we return to the village first and get this sorted out."

Silence. For one agonizingly long moment, no one moved. Then Susana sighed again.

"How disappointing. I had such high hopes for you, Haru."

That was all the warning Haru got before the zoroark charged her, shedding her disguise. Utter chaos broke loose. Out of the corner of her eye, Haru caught sight of Nip bolting, then the raichu chasing after him. The charizard exploded from the tree line, taking to the air to join the chase.

But she couldn't focus on that. Susana bore down on her, springing with claws outstretched. Haru had no time to run. No time to fight back. All she could do was curl into a ball and brace.

The pain of sharp teeth blossomed along her sides. She let out a terrified squeal, lifted and shaken violently before being tossed aside.

She lay dazed on the ground for a moment before trying to struggle to her feet, feeling blood oozing through her fur. But before she could, a paw grabbed her around the back of the neck and lifted her, so that she was face-to-face with Susana.

Haru squirmed and squealed, jaws snapping in instinctual panic. But the zoroark held her at an angle where she couldn't reach.

"What a disappointment," Susana said, casually strolling towards the rocky lip to the side of the path. "You seemed so like-minded. We thought you might even come around to understand us, with time. But I guess you were all talk."

She held the bidoof over the edge, giving Haru a clear view of the sharp drop, followed by a steep slope. She'd probably survive if she fell, but not without severe injury. An angry, pained screech in the distance told her Nip was faring no better.

"Since you had to go and make things difficult, let me explain how this is going to work." Susana shook Haru, letting her words sink in as she held the bidoof over the edge. "You're going to do everything we tell you to. You're going to take us to the shrine, like we asked. Then, when we're done there, you're going to continue to guide us further up the mountain, until we find proper information on Regigigas' current location or reach the top empty-handed. If you refuse, I'll drop you right now. If you try to run, I'll snap your neck. But if you're a good little bidoof and do everything we tell you to, we might let you go home when this is all said and done."

"U-up the mountain?" Images of an injured, malnourished, dying bibarel flashed through Haru's mind. "Y-you can't! It's too dangerous! No one has survived the trip!"

Susana loosened her grip. And just for a split second, Haru thought for sure she was falling. Then the claws closed around her right hind leg, leaving her dangling face-down. Her vision swam, and it felt like she was being sucked down the cliff, despite not moving at all.

"Well, Haru?"

"Okay, okay!" Haru squealed, shutting her eyes tight. "I'll do it!"

Her stomach lurched as she was pulled back over the edge before being unceremoniously dropped in the grass.

"If you want to eat, you better hurry up," Susana said. Then she turned to face the rest of her team. "Looks like you two caught him. Topaz, resecure the sneasel's bindings. Then feed him something. He's more valuable to us alive and I don't want to waste energy carrying him.

Haru had totally forgotten about their meal, her food trampled and dirty from the one-sided skirmish. She looked up just in time to see the charizard drop Nip, planting a foot on him before he could try to escape again. Still, he struggled, taking in heaving breaths as he tried to pull himself free. The raichu gave him a strike across the face before moving to resecure his leg bindings.

"Why'd you go and put his claws in front of him, Skorch," Topaz grumbled. "Ugh, what a mess."

"We were in a hurry," the charizard replied. "It took longer than expected to subdue both him and the ninetales."

The raichu grunted in response as he loosened the arm bindings just long enough to re-secure them behind Nip's back, leaving him unable to do anything with his claws. Nip, in turn, growled and tried to bite Topaz, but without success.

Umbra watched the proceedings with an unamused expression. "Why would you waste valuable resources on him?" she asked, stepping to the center of the group. "We should just kill him now before he finds a way to slip away again."

"Because you have yet to earn my trust," Susana responded as she gathered up the remainder of their meal site. "We don't need you getting in the way of our goals — which are already derailed as it is. He lives until we complete our goal or I am satisfied you will not turn on us or let Haru escape and run for help."

Umbra turned to glare at Haru, the murderous intent on her face clear. "You can do what you want with her. I hold no loyalty to this village. And I am more than happy to help with this excursion, so long as I can return home after. You do not need to hold my own goal over my head to convince me."

At that, Susana hesitated, glancing at Remer. "What do you think?"

"Steel pokemon are harder to get a read on," the girafarig answered, climbing to his feet, "though she seems honest in this regard."

The head on his back spoke next. "I'd still recommend keeping him alive until she proves her loyalty. Consider it… collateral."

"Very well. Then my answer stays." Susana turned back to Umbra. "Speak with Topaz and get yourself something to eat. I need to tend to Skorch's wound."

Umbra glared for a moment longer, then begrudgingly approached the raichu.

Haru looked down at her half-eaten food, her stomach twisting in knots. She couldn't finish it. She couldn't take a single bite. She was going to die here, lost to the mountain. And her family would probably never know what happened.

Someone stumbled into her side, sending a painful jolt across her fresh bite wound and forcing her attention back to reality. Nip slumped beside her, forced into a sitting position by Topaz. He growled at the rodent, but Haru could smell his fear.

"Wait there until we're ready to go," Topaz said, standing behind the two of them before turning his attention back to Susana.

With nothing better to do, Haru followed his gaze. Susana was standing next to Skorch, holding up one of her arms to inspect a nasty bite wound oozing with blood.

"Mm… It's a deep one, but not too severe. I'll use our last super and save the stronger stuff for later."

Reaching into her bag, the zoroark pulled out a small red bottle with a yellow contraption on top. She shook the bottle, claws scratching at the front of the contraption, then aimed it at the charizard's wound. A quiet hissing sound filled the air as a mist sprayed out of the bottle.

Skorch winced, but as the spray hit her wound, the bleeding quickly coagulated and then stopped. And to Haru's surprise, the wound grew smaller, scabbing over.

Once the mist stopped, Susana placed the bottle back in her bag. "Not perfect, but about as much as we can expect out of a self-brewed potion around here. Can you eat on the go?"

"Of course," Skorch replied as she tested her arm.

Susana bobbed her head. "Good, then we set off immediately." The zoroark turned back towards Haru with narrowed eyes and gestured up the path. "Lead the way. You too, sneasel. Stay in front of us."

Haru wanted to protest. Wanted to run away. But there was nowhere to run, and refusal meant certain death. So she climbed carefully to her feet, ignoring her developing aches, and began to walk. Nip limped just behind her. Casting a glance back, she could see his eyes glazed from pain and his ear flat against his skull. But he gritted his teeth and kept his gaze on the path ahead.

She turned back to the path as well, trying to ignore the gaze of the dangerous predators just behind her.

She'd messed up. She'd messed up bad. And now she was going to pay the price.
 

Inkedust

Harbinger of Sunrise
Location
Pokémon Square
Pronouns
she/her
Partners
  1. ninetales-inkedust
  2. solgaleo-inkedust
  3. xerneas
  4. zoroark-inkedust
  5. zoroark
It's been a hot minute since I've read this fic and the recent update inspired me to refresh myself from the very beginning. I'll be covering the prologue+the first four chapters here and I'll be going in bulletpoints since that's just how my brain likes to brain.

  • I won't touch on it too much since it's far smaller than the rest of the chapters I plan to discuss over the course of this review but I have to say that I really enjoy how the prologue is handled. It effectively sets up a lot of intrigue and gives us a glimpse of the general motives of the cast while the italicised speech-maker (I'm assuming it's some kind of rallying speech) alludes to the greater plot. The bits of worldbuilding here are also great and it makes me excited to see what this fic has in store.
  • So I think this opening scene does a great job at establishing character of three rather prominent characters. The interactions and quite a bit of the narration such as "Seeing her, Haru considered returning to bed." got a good chuckle out of me.
  • Of the lot, I think Haru easily makes the strongest impression on me, which is great seeing that she's one of the main leads.
  • It's clear from the outset that Shimmer has a very strong personality though her obession with Toshi does raise an eyebrow. Makes me wonder what he thinks of this.
  • Some interesting details about Shimmer and Muse. Her being the mayor's daughter does immediately shed some light on some aspects of her personality.
  • Muse has yet to leave much of an impression on me. Probably a side-effect of having two much stronger personalities (Haru and Shimmer) currently sharing the screen with Muse's more respectful and subdued.
  • I do think the decision to investigate the forest after a quick battle was a bit abrupt. It didn't feel as if there was much of a back and forth. Shimmer wanted to investigate, Muse advises against it but when Haru says they should check it out, there's no further comment beyond what amounts to an "aight" from Muse. Additionally I'd expect, based on what I've seen of her thus far, for Haru to consider the danger a bit more than just not at all. As it is now, it just feels like a bit of a contrivance to rush to the next plot point of finding a Not-So-Dead Nip.
  • Small point, but I do take a lot of enjoyment in seeing different colour variations of pokemon in fics. The green feathers being based on the original GS sneasel sprite is a nice touch. Also names of locations alluding towards a greater world is very cool to see.
  • Starting off with a symbolic dream that Definitely won't be important later it seems. Based on the prologue and the contents of this dream, I get the heavy impression that this has something to do with Yveltal. Like this is their realm or something and Nip taking a dive is him getting booted out due to still being alive.
  • I strongly enjoy Nip's perspective here. Not only do we get an immediate impression of his character but it's cool to see how pokemon from beyond Great Misty Canyon see and interpret the world around them.
  • Something that we saw back in Chapter 1 but sees a bit more emphasis here is how much more animalistic pokemon are in this fic which gives this world a much more unique vibe than most other PMD fics.
  • The interaction between Nip and the two medics is a pretty good scene. It really sells the more down-to-earth feel of the fic and also does a good job highlighting how the village pokemon (represented by Twi here) view so-called wildeners.
  • Egg.
  • "...who recoiled as she approached with narrowes eyes." - typo here. Should be "narrowed".
  • I also really like the discussion of the cultural differences between the Half Moon Tribe of the north and Theran village. Does a lot for worldbuilding.
  • "I am on a… spiritual journey of sorts," he explained after a second of hesitation. “For my tribe. For myself. I really must get going.” - X to Doubt.
  • "Most of the pokemon around here would love to hear about what the norther part of the land is like." - Another typo here. Should be "northern".
  • There sure is a lot of emphasis on that daycare :copyka:
  • "Her brother, Toshi, a slightly smaller bidoof, sat nearby looking like he wanted to be anywhere but here." - Ha, oh dear.
  • Some lore regarding the area. This plus the prologue makes me very curious as to how legendaries are going to be handled here.
  • I also enjoy how Haru's perspective on the legends is handled here. How many of those words is she going to eat if she ever finds out they're real
  • Not much to say on the guided tour seeing that its function is to give the reader a clearer image of the village and its layout.
  • "We only have a few guards, but they take their job very seriously. No wildener would ever dare try to break in here." Top Ten Images Before Disaster.
  • And now it's time for the Meat Question. I think it's interesting to see the compromises that the village pokemon make (i.e. they're only eating carrion) to try and remain ethical. Not to mention that they try to hide it as much as possible given how far Mandi's store is from the main square. I do think that it's cool that a predator pokemon worships Yveltal on the premise that death is inevitable and a nessessary part of life which ties into the hunting.
  • Really enjoy the scene at the shrine for the obvious intrigue/worldbuilding reasons.
  • I am absolutely certain that nothing bad will ever happen to that egg.
  • "striking her directly in the stomach with anther headbutt" - typo here, should be "another".
  • Also this will absolutely go Good and Fine for Nip. No murderous intent here.
  • You know, if the communal meals had just been more accomidating for obligate carnivores, there would've been a lot less Problems(TM). Ironic that trying to ignore/bury the existence of meat brings it right out in the open.
  • Damn, poor Toshi. At least it allows Nip to not-so-subtlely reveal that he has also seen his fair share of relationship problems.
  • And the fic's first Mystery Dungeon makes its appearance! It's been a hot minute since I've read this but I do remember you having a very cool and unique take on them.
  • One, I love the small meta-joke with Red Rescue and two, nice to see some team worldbuilding!
  • You know, if the Plot didn't Happen, I wonder how far from his tribe Nip would've ended up.
  • Also Nip not being used to people being nice to him is honestly sad if you think about it.
  • Ah yes, and now for the Totally Good and Fine things for Nip to occur.
  • Egg.
  • Gotta always pick the worst of the poor decisions in times of crisis.
  • And, if possible, make things even *worse* when making the worst decision.
  • Nice, chaotic action sequence to finish off the chapter. Looks like things are starting to hit the ground running, even if the greater scope of the plot from the prologue is still looming in the shadows.
  • And into the Mystery Dungeon.
All in all, a pretty good start! While the first couple chapters do feel lackadaisical in pace, I think it works well in setting up both the world and tone of the fic and it's not like things are super slow to start out at the beginning since things do start picking up right at the end of Chapter 3 while Chapter 4 is all action. I'm very intrigued in this world you've setup and am curious to see the oncoming twists and turns that the greater narrative has in store for our protagonists and their (read: Nip's) Terrible Choices(TM). Thanks for the read!
 
25: Alliance

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
  9. manectric
Thanks for the review, Inke! I apologize that I haven't had the spoons to reply to any recent review - life's been hectic for a while now. But know I always read and appreciate every one.

Alliance


"Up ahead, that has to be the right place. Right, Susana?"

Haru didn't look up to see where the charizard was pointing. Everything hurt. Her legs, her head, her belly, even her ego. She'd barely paid attention to where they were walking, only glancing up when addressed to see if they were still on the right path. Otherwise, she tried to ignore the conversations around her. But it was difficult when the explorers spoke in harsh, hushed tones, discussing what to do after they were finished at the old shrine, and how long they could afford to travel after dark before resting.

To her side Nip limped along, his breathing heavy and punctuated with the occasional whine. He seemed determined to focus on the path ahead, ignoring his hostile surroundings save for the occasional swivel of his ear.

It was hard to feel sympathetic. In Haru's opinion, this was all his fault. If he hadn't shown up, none of this would have happened. The explorers wouldn't have turned on her, and she wouldn't be a prisoner. She'd be able to go home after this. But now? Now she was as good as dead. If the explorers didn't kill her, the mountain would.

Behind her, the sound of paw steps came to a sudden stop. Haru stopped a few heartbeats later, forcing herself to look up.

Before them, a cavern gaped wide open, carved into a cliff face. Faded carvings decorated its entrance, mostly covered by overgrown vines and moss. Although she couldn't see it well from her vantage point, she knew there was writing above the entrance reading, "To our Protector, our Lord, Regigagas."

Susana took a step forward and spun around to face the group. "Okay. I want to finish with this site before sundown, which doesn't give us much time. Topaz, you stay out here with our guide and prisoner. Everyone else is with me. That includes you, Umbra."

The mawile scoffed, shaking her head, but said, "Very well." With Susana in the lead, she and the other explorers disappeared into the yawning cave.

Haru sank to her belly, paws screaming for a break. She was ready to wake up from this nightmare. But her aches reminded her that this was all too real.

A hiss at her side snapped her out of her thoughts. She started to disdainfully turn her attention towards Nip, only to let out an alarmed squeak and scramble back to her feet.

Topaz was no longer a raichu. In his place stood a larger rodent, its fur a dark reddish-orange. Haru scrambled a few precious steps back from the unfamiliar pokemon.

The strange pokemon scoffed, shaking out its fur, then spoke in Topaz's voice, his tone patronizing. "What? Never seen a gorochu before?"

"N-no!" Haru stuttered. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

"That's because your stupid, backwards raichu never learned to evolve." Topaz flexed his forepaws, an electric pulse rippling from his cheeks all the way down to his tail. "This p — this place, this continent is so weird."

Cautiously, Haru took a step forward. "W-what are you talking about?"

The gorochu rolled his eyes, scoffing. "Ugh, how much do I have to spell out for you? Are you really this dense?" He sized up Haru with a smirk. "We're not from around here, you hillbilly. We came from across the ocean on our Lady's orders. Took us long enough to get a seafaring vessel going with our mixed bag of knowledge and the frankly paltry resources on the other continent, but here we are."

"Across the ocean?" Nip asked. "That's impossible!"

Haru had to agree. They had boats capable of riding the ocean along the coast, sure. But going out to open waters? That was far too dangerous!

And yet, everything presented to Haru thus far suggested these pokemon were capable of more than anyone she knew. Still, there was something she couldn't wrap her head around. "But… But why? Why are you doing this?"

Topaz opened his mouth to say something more, then suddenly snapped it shut, his expression shifting into a glare. "I've said more than enough. I'm not about to get my hide tanned for overspeaking. Besides, what's it matter to you? You're as good as dead once this is all over, anyways."

Before she could question him further he turned away, though the way his ears twitched made it clear he was still listening to her every movement.

He's right, I'm going to die here, she thought. She'd hardly thought of anything but her demise since the explorers — or whoever they were — turned on her. Topaz wasn't lying. The chances of surviving this ordeal were slim, whether death came by accident or by the paws of his team.

"Haru?"

Why did this have to happen? Why? Why? When did everything all go so wrong? When did her life spiral out of control?

Her eyes darted back and forth until they settled on dark, blue-green fur. Right. Everything spiraled out of control the moment he showed up. Maybe she wouldn't have come with the explorers if not for her experiences with him.

Her head spun, her breathing shallow. Maybe… Maybe…

"Haru? Haru, you need to snap out of it. This isn't helping."

It took her a moment to realize Nip was talking to her. He was staring at her now, gaze inscrutable. If anything, his expression suggested… Worry? Pity, maybe?

Anger swirled in her head, mixing with barely restrained panic to create a volatile cocktail. "This is all your fault!"

"My fault?" Nip recoiled as if struck by claws.

"Yes, your fault! If you hadn't shown up, then none of this would have happened."

"You chose to work with those pokemon of your own free will," he hissed, hackles raised and with a growl in his throat. "I had nothing to do with this."

Haru ignored him. "Everything's gone wrong since you came here," she countered, her voice raising to a shrill squeak. "The egg, then Umbra, then Tempest and Celebi, and now this. If you hadn't shown up, I'd be on my way home soon! But instead, I'm going to die on this gods-forsaken mountain and no one's ever going to know what happened!"

Ending her rant with a wail, Haru buried her face in her paws, curling up to block out the world. She took deep, shuddering breaths, his previous words sinking in. Nip had a point. She knew he had a point. But she couldn't accept it. She couldn't accept the idea that she'd driven herself to her own demise.

Mom, Dad, Toshi… I'm sorry.

Something hard gently nudged her side. A few heartbeats later, it happened again, this time with more force.

"Hey," Nip grunted, nudging her a third time. "You're not dead yet. And that means there's still hope."

Slowly, Haru uncurled, staring up at Nip with wet eyes. His expression gave away his annoyance, but his tone was gentle.

"There is still hope," he repeated, lowering his voice. "If you can just hold on to that, if you can just focus on that little chance of survival, then maybe we can figure something out. That's how I got by as long as I did."

Haru blinked in confusion. "Wh… what are you trying to say?"

At first, Nip didn't reply. He turned his head towards Topaz, ear flicking before he turned back to Haru with a lowered voice. "I'm saying that there's always a chance we can make it out of this alive. We just need to focus. Just need to be alert and ready to pounce on opportunity. But that opportunity won't come if you give up."

Unease plagued Haru's mind. But the more Nip said, the more her panic dissipated, leaving behind clarity. He… had a point. She wasn't dead yet. Maybe there was still a chance to escape. But one major obstacle stood at the forefront of her mind.

Keeping her voice low, she asked, "But how? There's five of them. And I'm not a fast runner."

Nip took a deep breath, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, the frustrated expression was gone. "You're right. In normal circumstances, we'd never get away. I'm injured. You're injured too, but less so. That's why we have to be prepared for an opportunity to present itself. For an opening where they're busy or preoccupied."

He looked to the sky in the direction of the setting sun. "Wherever they think they're going, it's going to take a couple of days to get there. Which means we have a couple of days to figure something out. To find a moment when enough of them are distracted so we can make a break for it. For a convenient chance to lose them in dense forest, or down a river, or… something."

Now that he had mentioned their injuries, Haru felt acutely aware of all her aches and bruises. He spoke a lot of sense, but they'd never get far in this state. Maybe his hope was misplaced.

But at the same time, it was the only hope she had. She'd never get away with just her strength and skill alone. As uneasy as she was at the prospect, she needed his help. He, more than anyone, knew a thing or two about running and hiding and avoiding capture.

"Okay," she finally said. "It's worth a shot."

But if they were going to have any chance of escape, they needed to be as prepared as possible.

Twisting, she reached around to grab a strap on her bag with her teeth, pulling it around where she could easily access it. She reached inside with grabby paws, scooping out four oran berries. One was kept for herself, while the other three were rolled towards Nip.

"I can't make proper medicine out of these," she whispered, "but they should still help some if you eat them."

Nip stared at the berries, squinting, before shifting to remind Haru that his arms were still tightly bound behind him. Right. That was a problem now, and it could cause more later. She was positive she could chew through them, but not with Topaz watching. Not while he snuck suspicious glances their way, tail sparking threateningly.

With a sigh, Haru reached out to pull the berries back to her side, using her teeth and paws to tear apart the thick skin. Then she passed the mostly intact flesh back. This time, Nip leaned down, wincing, to grab it with his teeth, popping the whole thing in his mouth to chew as best he could. Haru peeled two more berries before starting on her own.

As she watched the sneasel eat, she noticed that Nip's focus shifted from her to their surroundings, his ear swiveling at every sound.

"How are you handling this?" she couldn't help but ask. "Aren't you scared?"

"Terrified," Nip corrected. Now that he mentioned it, Haru realized the fur at the back of his neck was standing on end. And yet, he was somehow managing to remain the rational one between them.

"I lived the last three cycles of my life in constant fear," Nip continued. "And I learned that giving up doesn't make things better. If you want to survive you have to fight back."

"Fight back…" Haru considered his words for a moment, studying the grass beneath her paws. She glanced back up, words tumbling out of her mouth without thinking. "Is that how you've justified your crueler actions?"

"Haru, please." Nip's expression turned stricken, and there was an edge of desperation to his tone. "If we want to get out of this alive, we have to work together. Bickering doesn't help. Can't this wait until we're out of danger?"

Nip made a good point. Embarrassment turned Haru's face hot. She decided to change the subject and instead focused on a different thought plaguing her mind.

"This mountain is dangerous enough in the best of times," she mumbled, tracing patterns in the dirt. Now that they weren't talking about escape, she didn't bother keeping quiet enough to avoid Topaz's listening ear. "I lost my grandpa to the mountain…"

Nip looked like he wanted to say something. But before he could, Susana reappeared, now without her disguise.

"We need you at the shrine, Haru," the zoroark said, her tone cloying. "Topaz, keep an eye on the other one, will you?"

Haru cautiously climbed to her paws, picking her way across the overgrown path. She didn't want to go. Why would Susana need her? Had they changed their minds and decided to kill her here? Or maybe she was overthinking this, and they were actually going to let her go?

Light filtered into the cave, but it couldn't penetrate far. With the sun setting on the other side of the mountain, most of this area was cast in shadow.

But that didn't stop Susana. As they entered, she scooped up a short torch that had been planted at the entrance. She gestured for Haru to lead the way.

Dirt and dust coated every inch of the chamber, tinting everything with reddish grime. The shapes of carvings flickered in and out of view within the torchlight, depicting many of the stories of Regigigas that Haru still remembered from her childhood. Some of them, however, had been coated by slimy lichen, blotting out parts of the pictures or text.

Here and there, the rotting remnants of wooden furniture and structures still remained. Nature had reclaimed the shrine fast; if Haru remembered correctly, it had only been about fifteen cycles since the shrine in the village was completed.

Near the back of the chamber stood a statue of Regigigas, carved from stone and just small enough to fit inside. Haru remembered hearing that it was carved out of the cave itself. Small bits of metal made up the eyes and markings on the statue, gleaming in the light of the fire. At the base was a stone basin. At one time, it would have been filled with water — a representation of Regice to complete the trio — but with the disuse of the shrine, it now lay barren.

Haru came to a sudden stop as she caught sight of the rest of the false explorers. They, too, had undergone transformations like Topaz. Skorch's transformation was almost unnoticeable, with only the loss of a horn. But the second head on Remer where his tail should have been felt uncanny.

And Umbra didn't seem phased by their true forms at all. If anything, she seemed bored. Perhaps frustrated.

"Don't just stand there," Susana huffed, giving Haru a nudge with her foot. "You have work to do."

Haru stumbled forward with a squeak. "What do you want from me?" she demanded in a shaky voice. "What can I do that you can't?"

Susana approached a wall to their right. She tapped her claws against an image of Regigigas shaping a mountain. Or, to be more specific, against old, faded writing beneath it.

"Can you read this?"

Haru took a few careful steps forward, squinting in the dark. Her head ached, perhaps from trying to make out the small shapes in the dark. It looked like it was written in the antiquated writing style her village used before the modern incorporated territories standardized written language, forcing them to switch for trade purposes. Instead of a series of dots and dashes, the dots were stacked in bunches of three rows and two columns. Her grandfather had thought it important for her to learn.

And so our Lord came to form Mount Domo
That which He would call Home for ages to come
We rejoiced for his proximity
We prayed for his protection


"I don't know what it says," Haru lied, turning to Susana. "We don't use that form of writing anymore. It died out over a lifetime ago."

Silence fell over the room. Haru held her breath. Then, suddenly, pain exploded in her head and she felt a force seize her and lift her inches into the air. She let out a loud yelp, flailing, her senses blurred.

"She's lying," Remer — his second, darker head — hissed. "She's telling a partial truth. I heard the words echo in her head."

Realization struck Haru. He'd been listening the whole time. Had he been listening before, too? How hadn't she noticed? Was he that advanced?

Was that why they suggested finding someone else to bring them here? Was that why she jumped to the conclusion of Toshi? Had he been subtly influencing her thoughts or manipulating her the whole time?

She focused, remembering the basics of warding off a psychic's powers. She took a deep breath and cleared her mind, then focused on the visual image of spikes and thorns, of fire, of all things unpleasant.

Get out of my head!

The girafarig recoiled and dropped Haru. For just a heartbeat, Haru felt proud of herself. Then Susana loomed over her and all feelings of accomplishment gave way to fear.

"Is that so, Remer? I'm disappointed in you, Haru. Did you really think you could hide things from us? Do I need to remind you of the position you're in?" As she spoke, dark, wispy tendrils swirled around her jaws.

Haru shrank back. "N…no, of course not." An image of Nip flashed in her mind. She quickly forced it down, focusing on the zoroark's jaws instead. She couldn't afford to let them hear any thoughts of escape. Nip would be safe, but any moment she thought of escape without diligence was a chance Remer could read her mind.

"Well then," Susana growled. She reached down to spin Haru around so that she was facing the wall again. "Read."

Haru took a deep breath, trying not to tremble with fear. She repeated the words she'd thought before, phrasing familiar from her childhood.

Susana bobbed her head. "Good. On to the next."

The two of them made their way around the chamber, Susana providing light as Haru read the passages out loud. Passages about the creation of the continent. Passages about lands far beyond the ocean, far out of reach, with warnings to never go here. Passages about the war of the gods. Passages about the followers of Regigigas, hidden away from battle until they couldn't hide anymore. And passages about Mount Domo, and the mystery dungeon near the peak, where legends said Regigigas lived.

"Is all this really necessary?" Umbra growled when Haru was about halfway done. She leaned against the wall, arms crossed across her chest. "This seems like a waste of time."

"Far from it," Skorch replied, her tail swishing. She was now on the ground, using her good arm and a piece of charcoal to scrawl in an unfamiliar script. "Even if we don't use this information to track down Regigigas now, it will be even more worth it later, when the others arrive."

The others. Haru had forgotten about that. And now, with new context, horrors swirled in her mind.

It wasn't just her in danger. It was her entire village.

She had to get out of there.

She had to survive.

She had to warn everyone.

But for the moment, she pushed her thoughts out of her head. For now, she needed to focus on what was in front of her, to focus on surviving this day.
 

Ambyssin

Gotta go back. Back to the past.
Location
Residency hell
Pronouns
he/him
Partners
  1. silvally-dragon
  2. necrozma-ultra
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. dreepy
  6. mewtwo-ambyssin
Blitzy New Year!
Disclaimer: My blitz reviews are stream of consciousness styled rambles. Let me know if you have any questions.

I am still a ways off ever catching up, which is fine. Last I checked, an onion had crashed the village to destroy Haru's worldview.

16: Not me realizing I hadn't read this chapter last time and starting with the interlude first :grohno:
-Love how Nip defaults to doom first for Celebi's prophets. What a Negative Nanipsy.
-Man it's funny that the mayor keeps turning to this pack of kids for help with stuff. Real great governing authority there, my guy. Yes I know it's just cleaning up a mess shhhhhh.
-Oh no Celebi's a gremlin. Oh double no Celebi knows Haru's family. :copyka:
-Okay the "message... of doom!" thing now just has me imagining Celebi sounding like Zim. Or, well, basically any character voiced by Richard Steven Horvitz. Gremlin Celebi is certainly a unique take for my money. Usually this kind of behavior is reserved for, like, Mew. Or Hoopa. ... Oh god what would Hoopa be like in this setting?!
-Reading this in incorrect order like the fool I am, Celebi's premonition is absolutely talking about the weird looking possibly maybe Yveltal worshippers that show up at the end of the interlude.
-"Buy gold?" Dear god, Celebi's the in-universe equivalent of a crypto bro. Noooooooooooooooo.
-With how much everyone keeps bringing up how calm Celebi's supposed to be, I can't help but wonder if all the time jumping left him a little, y'know, not right in the head. Maybe this world should've just gone with making a new celebi every so often and "retiring" the old one(s).

Interlude
-If I'm remembering correct from a year ago, Blue's the important explorer that Haru's brother looked up to. So, this cutaway is to the Expedition Society, then?
-Seems hunting is frowned upon no matter where in the world is Carmen San Diegoyou go.
-Okay, if I'm reading this right, the team's gone on some major expedition that's off the reserve and they're in the process of setting up base camp.
-I'm going to venture a guess Red and Yellow are Flareon and Jolteon, respectively.
-Eeeyep, seems about right.
-Hmm, seems like for all that admiration we heard about before, things may not be quite so rosy for this group if they're in such dire straights.
-A zoroark, uh, priest? Or, at least, an emissary? I'll admit, that's a different take on the species. It seems like the opening for this scene implies a decent amount of illusory powers. More like movie!Zoroark in how Maneth operates. (Not a complaint. Love me big illusionists.)
-The takeaway is that something seems to be hunting down these pixies. My guess is that's our simmering dark force that'll come to the forefront as the fic progresses.
-A charmander and treecko duo? Gee, that sounds familiar :mewlulz:
-Oh, never mind. I guess we're seeing the dark force now. I'm... not sure if these anatomic differences are referencing anything specific like beta sprites or what have you. But that brief flicker of a vision at the end brings Yveltal to mind. Which IIRC is what Nip's tribe worships. So, are these them? Or some other Yveltal-worshiping faction? 🤔

17: Just find a good masseuse, then
-No, Muse, it's definitely not nothing making your horn act up. You fool.
-Nip acting subdued since Celebi? Well, 16 does end with more of that guilt over his actions bubbling up. Maybe it's continuing to eat at him?
-I thought Haru's family mostly ate veggies. How does one burn a meal of veggies?! 😱
-lol the tavern owner's name is Meaad. All the subtlety of a sledgehammer.
-I mean I can understand it for Muse but still whyyyyyyyyy are the kids volunteering for town duty? No wonder stuff's messed up here. :copyka:
-The stuff about Tempest demonstrates one of the things I like about Shimmer. She does come across as ditzy and is perhaps a bit reckless with her abandon, but she has a very pure heart. I think it fits her well as a kirlia. Nice bit of dex lore/story integration.
-I don't remember if this is the first time what happened to Haru's grandfather has been expanded upon. Can't recall it involving other family members of our main cast like this. Certainly goes to explain Haru's resentment toward all of this. And, perhaps, why Muse sticks so closely to Shimmer. It may not be just a whole bodyguard matter, but also a bond because they both experienced a similar loss at the exact same time. A new wrinkle of depth, so to speak.

18: But where is she hiding these thoughts? 🤔
-The old disaster sense struggles rearing their head. It would make sense that absol need to learn how to adapt to it and understand what the sense brings. And Muse losing her mother would certainly get in the way of that.
-On the one hand, Whisper's right about telling Shimmer if Muse really cares. Which she totally does and this is totally something more than just charge and guard but both parties are blind to it lol. On the other hand, if anyone could potentially do something reckless with this info, iiiiit's Shimmer.
-Oh, okay, Muse's thoughts acknowledge these risks. I feel validated.
-I think Whisper sees it. :copyka:
-Ah ha, never mind. The subtext is just out the window and Lotte's bringing it up directly. Okay. Message received, fic. I was not expecting the Muse romance melodrama. XD
-Right. I think I forgot there are these crisscrossing schemes going on in the backdrop of all of this. I predict this news will somehow end up reaching Shimmer and may chip away some of that mask of hers.
-This is an interesting chapter mostly focused on the character dynamics. A little bit of a break after the last couple were focused on advancing things in the wake of this whole premonition of DOOOOOOOM business. And it's nice to get in Muse's head. She's clearly conflicted in her loyalties and it troubles her a lot, but she's still trying to do the right thing. Gud absol. Deserves pets.

19: In other words, trudges. We got trudges.
-Haru try not to instantly death glare at Nip challenge (failed immediately)
-Nip's depressed, isn't he? Insomnia, lack of commitment to hygiene, not speaking or emoting much. Celebi really put him into a blue screen of death.
-Muse is totally telling Haru and Toshi about this premonition on top of Shimmer, isn't she? :copyka:
-Wait, was that a vision Haru had of what happened to her grandfather or just some imagine spot of what she thinks it might have been like?
-Ooooh, it might've been a previous premonition from Muse that she told the others about? Though, huh, I find it weird Muse's mother wouldn't have sensed a similar disaster and tried to stop this from happening in the first place.
-Haru's outburst sucks, sure, but it's not entirely unjustified all things considered. Decent gray morality picture of this, even if she has been a bit too eager to see Nip offed for what he did.
-What a coincidence that Haru runs into the explorers. I feel like if it was Toshi he'd have let slip all the stuff with Celebi, too. Haru can't seem to help it, but I'm definitely surprised these explorers are just willing to trust a stranger out of the gate after Anu's less than helpful response to their plight.
-GHOST FOX ALERT. That's +100 Amby interest points. 👀

20: Dayum, girl gets a whole ass chapter named after her.
-I wonder if some of Haru's response is, like, instinctual prey reaction to a predator.
-Oh, okay, the young absol last part was Muse and this must have been them discovering the fate of their family members.
-I want to trust that Susana's team is being honest and that, to some extent, their interests do align with Haru's. At the same time, I wonder how much of this is actually a desire to make sure her idealistic brother stays out of trouble. Could there be an unspoken element of wanting to be proven right again with regards to the temple? Or that if she reaches it, she could somehow give a piece of her mind to the insides for what happened to her grandfather? We know she's vengeful given how she's acted with regards to Nip.
-Waaaaaait a second. The interlude ended with a charmander and treecko pair getting attacked for trying to eavesdrop on a suspicious group. I rescind my previous comment. This is very sus. They probably swiped the stuff from that duo, took their cover story, and are plotting something.
-And it seems like I don't even have to wait for the facade to be revealed. So, we've got a tribe of demon 'mons. I'm still not sure if some of these appearances are supposed to reference something.
-Lmao welp guess now these two and this group are in cahoots. Sure. XD

21 (you have this labeled as 22 in your threadmarks, so either there's a chapter missing or you misnumbered this)
-Oh, hey, the prose acknowledges the possibility Haru's doing this for spite. I'll take it! (Again!)
-Saku sounds like a good mom. One of the rarer caring ones you see in these sorts of cis. Almost as if to emphasize that Haru's walking down a dangerous path.
-This contrasts nicely with the talk Anu and Nip have after. How Anu is trying to find some sort of middle ground of a way forward. Not to mention Nip's nightmare that seems one part guilty conscience and another part a premonition that death may be coming for him? The stuff that follows sure seems to suggest premonition to me.
-I'm not entirely sure if the fic wants me to be rooting for Haru or not right now, given all of her actions. Things are certainly getting more complicated toward the end here. The layers of gray to all of this make for an interesting dynamic to be sure. Nip has, indeed, done bad things, but Anu's pointed comment about the cycles of revenge is juxtaposed quite nicely with Umbra's arrival to, well, do exactly that. And Vale seems to be trying for a small amount of revenge of his own, even though Umbra seems determined to muck that up by setting fire to the jail.

The REAL 22 (which is not indexed by threadmark btw so I don't know the word count XP)
-That's gotta be some impressive telepathy range for Tempest to ping Muse. I thought he was still learning the basics. XD
-Oh no, outside of the terror of seeing the state of the jail and Tempest, it seems Tempest is lifting back the Vale (hah) on things that may involve her father...
-Though it shows some hidden depths that Shimmer was able to pack that disbelief down to put on her usual sugary sweet act to try and put him under extra scrutiny. Even if it does make sense for her not to believe Tempest. Clearly the telepathy lessons have gotten her to trust this icetales.
-I can't remember if you started this fic before or after SwSh's DLC came out, so I'm not sure if the lore's been revised to accommodate the new Regis or if this was always planned. Calling them failed creations is an interesting take. Competitively they're more viable than the other three...
-It's cute Susana is trying to make her motives sound so pure when we as the audience saw what happened to Victini and, well, the charmander she's currently impersonating. :V It is funny seeing this attempt at altruism brush up against Haru, who remains as entrenched as ever. Like, of course she won't question anything Susana's saying and instead just dismiss it as overly idealistic. In some sense, she's, like, the perfect person for these pretenders to use. Too entrenched in her ways for this to raise red flags over. Perhaps in that sense, she's not all that much different from the townsfolk whose religious views she's criticizing.

23 (also not indexed btw)
-What would a curse from Yveltal even entail in this setting? That someone's marked for death? I don't think so, b/c if Nip was cursed he'd have died a while ago at this rate. What about the opposite, then: marked for undeath? Or beating on death's door but not quite dying? [insert "almost dead" meme here]
-Welp, it did not take long for things to go completely belly up, did it? Though the bit about keeping Nip's arms tied in front was funny. Everyone knows you gotta keep the arms and hands somewhere they can be seen. C'mon.
-Wait, wait, wait. A super potion? There are so many different ideas that brings up. Are there actually humans over on another continent? Did they die out and this group holds memories of what the humans know? Were they brought over from a world of humans and pokémon? This might've been alluded to somewhere in my previous reads and I don't remember. XP
-Definitely a shorter part here. Perhaps a bit too short, given a part of it is just... showing how Nip managed to slip away. (And it's debatable how necessary that is.) But I know most of your writing motivation is elsewhere and you've fallen out a bit with pokémon, so it's not that big a deal.

24 (again, not indexed)
-Even after all of this, Haru's still quick to foist the blame onto Nip and not think about her own decisions that led her to this point. I mean, yeah, she tried to stick up for him last chapter, I guess. It's like I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop and her to have her (figurative or literal) come to Poké Jesus moment.
-Gorochu? Okay, so these are based on lost beta sprites from the early days. On top of regional forms. There's definitely more to this "other continent" though. They clearly have human-level tech.
-Nip saying to hold onto hope? Puhuhuhu...
-Oh my god the temple uses the same braille language as the Regi spots in the main line games, doesn't it? XD
-Ah, so with the realization of the danger posed to everyone else, Haru now understands partnering with Nip to find a way out of this is necessary. Survival instincts kicking in and all that.

... And, huh, this actually means I've caught up. Color me surprised. While the A plot has certainly kicked into high gear, the overall power scaling continues to remain low. Easily digestible and understandable. I get the sense that the moment for Haru and Nip to potentially escape will come when the others manage to catch up. I can't imagine them not catching up. This group definitely had a lead on them, but stopping to explore the temple should give them a chance to make up time. I feel like you're going to stick with Haru and Nip's perspective to keep things moving along. Just because I can't imagine the back group would have much to do other than worrying about what's happening.
 

Gyeig

Bug Catcher
Pronouns
he/him
Partners
  1. samurott

Review of Chapters 1 and 2​



Hey Windskull, here to drop a review of the first few chapters. I’m sure you’ve gotten enough of those already, but you gotta start somewhere.

Anyway, I recall reading this fic long ago, but I didn’t get very far and it’s been so long that anything beyond the basic strokes of the story are little more than a blurred outline, so it’s better to just start anew here. Alright, enough time wasted, time for the review.

Introductions are a funny thing. Some leave you scratching your head wondering what on earth you just started, others are pretty darn engaging from the start. And then you get the ones where you just feel exactly what kind of story you’ve dipped into. This fic is one of the latter. Right away, based on the intro, even based on the title for that matter, you get an adequate sense of what Places We Call Home is like - the difference between village Pokemon and wildlings, the inevitable conflict that ensues in this world because of said difference, the greater moral dilemma behind this conflict, and so on. In terms of setting first impressions, you’ve hit the bullseye here.

Of course, these early two chapters might not necessarily be the most exciting in terms of actual content rather than the implications, but this is extremely well done regardless of that.

Speaking of well done, you do a good job at introducing the main characters - Haru and Nip both stand out in their own ways: Reactions, relationships, attitudes, or even their background as a whole, their traits are generally pretty clear, and if the plot’s headed where I think it’s headed, there’s bound to be plenty of interesting interactions between them. Side character wise… it’s a little early to tell, but I didn’t get as strong of an impression from characters like Muse or Lecha. Not to say they’re underdeveloped, it all depends on what the plot’s going to do from here on out.

Overall… I can’t really say I found much of anything to dislike here? Maybe that the prose is a little repetitive, maybe even a little unimaginative in places, but that’s me digging through the bottom of the barrel here.

And… that’s pretty much it. Liked these two opening chapters a lot, and I’m curious to see what happens next. Thanks again for the chapters, and good luck with the rest of your writing!
 
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