The White Elephant in the Room Playground

[Tanuki]

The Game Has Not Started Yet: Do Not Post.

This is a final reiteration of the rules and such before The First Day Dawns proper (at 5:00 PM Central Standard Time Daylight Savings). Your character will bring a gift and some items, and I'll send you a dm with that information. This does not necessarily determine your alignment, and while I may give your character an item, you can of course have your character bring whatever other items you believe they'd bring. If you don't get a direct message from me before my opening post, contact me immediately.

The first day will be 29 hours long, all other days will be 48 hours long (supposedly), and nights will last 24 hours (again, supposedly). Gifts will be distributed on the first night, usable starting on the second day. Some gifts can be used during daytime, but most only during night. Your dm will tell you when you are able to use your gift.

Gifts will act as traditional Roles, your character's unique ability in the game. Some roles dictate alignment, others don't. Items are purely roleplay-centric. For the gift you give, you'll only get a name; the gift you get will I will decide gifts with a roll of a die, both what you give and what you get. Randomness is standard, but since this is a nonstandard experience, I wanted to ensure you that I'm keeping that convention.

Speaking of nonstandard experiences, remember: This game is roleplay required. All posts must be in character. Narration is of course allowed, including internal thoughts and feelings. Treat it like any other roleplay, but don't forget Your Objective >:3.

Once again, do not yet reply to this thread. If you have any questions, ask me in the discord or with a direct message.
@Equitia @Namohysip @Chibi Pika @unrepentantAuthor @DawningWinds @Fusion @Dragonfree @SparklingEspeon @windskull @Starlight Aurate @Persephone @IFBench

Good Luck~

 

[Tanuki]

The unseen sun shone bright on the glistening, snowy mountain top. No cloud obscured the sky, and only the faintest of wind brushed the fur, skin, and scales of the recent arrivals. Whether or not they remembered agreeing to some winter vacation, they all remembered packing for it anxiously—in both senses of the word. Nobody remembered putting their luggage in the wailords now dropping off their belongings in front of them, but everybody remembered that they did.


The air had no motion, yet swirled around them nonetheless. The surrounding snow looked close to frozen, but the temperature felt like the inside of a cozy cabin. In fact, it felt exactly like the picturesque cabin that stood mere meters away, the only building directly between them and the mountainside. Far off to the East (at least, it felt like East, though perhaps that was only because it was to the party’s right) stood a wood building much larger. A cable lift left through the roof of it, and several shops of quaint names decorated its outside.


Looking at the many different shops’ labels, they changed every time anyone looked at them twice. They never stayed the same, but seemed attuned to whatever luxury the person looking at them desired. The sight itself shot the eyes with its constant flux and inexcusable gaudiness. The mountain made for a much nicer view.


On the silent, still mountain, a streak of red tore down the highest hill. Snow sprayed all around it as it carved a path down the mountain. The eagle-eyed could barely make out a squirtle with a red handkerchief, hat, and wicked snow board. He caught sight of the party just as they saw him and beamed a smile brighter than the absent sun that illuminated the scene.


With as much regard for his own safety as anyone would expect of a squirtle, he quickly pivoted parallel to the slope to gain as much momentum as possible. He didn’t seem to see the mass of trees directly in his path! Right before an untimely collision, he sprayed water below him that instantly froze into a large ramp with well-practiced ease.


After he took to the air, he went from the top of the mountain to in front of the cabin. He flipped several times, too many to count, striking a pose on each rotation. So enamored with his last pose, he failed to land. The board caught in the snow, coating the party in its spray. The squirtle didn’t notice at all, up on his feet in a flash.


“Hi!” He ran in front of the party and stuck out his hand for a shake. This little guy must have learned some advanced form of double-team, because every party member felt him grab their hand (or paw, or closest approximation of a front-side appendage) into an eager handshake. “I’m Squirt!” Squirt declared. “You must be The Party!”


The youth’s eyes beamed into everyone else’s before shooting to the identical, black-wrapped presents in front of everyone. Or was there only the one? Everyone remembered packing and wrapping one, or at least that they did, but not all could remember why or how they obtained the item hidden within. Within the warmth of the cabin, a chill ran down the spines of a select few.


Squirt ran between every present, examining each thoroughly before leaping to the next. “You all remembered! Great! Merry—“ his smile faltered, and he stopped dead in his tracks, if only for a moment. He took a step back, cleared his throat, and looked at the group with a melancholy grin. “Thanks for coming! I can’t wait to share presents tomorrow! I hope whoever gets mine likes it!”


His jubilance returned with a vengeance, and he turned to the cabin, beckoning everyone inside with a wave of his hand and a, “Come on! Let’s get inside. It’s freezing out here.” Without taking a step, everyone was in the cabin. Despite having only one floor and at most a single window, the cabin had several stories and plenty room for everyone. Each room was even personalized so much that it was easy to believe everyone had lived in them for months, maybe even years.


A fireplace warmed the space, a sparkling tree hiding all the black presents beneath. Above the mantle hung a massive flat-screen television connected to a PlayStation 3 beside the fire. Very close to the fire. Almost in it. A wonder it could run at all, but its lights stayed on, and it seemed the only source to explain the grown man in an elf costume running around a city of humans on the big screen. Plugged into the same outlet extender (which was itself not plugged into any power outlet) as the television and PlayStation was a bright white ipod photo. It had an audio cable plugged into it, but the cable lay impotent around it with no device to transmit its… signal. Only its backlit display even suggested it was on.


“Oh, I can’t wait to see who gets my present!” Squirt said, eyeing each one beneath the tree. “Gotta wait until tomorrow, though!” He forced himself away from the presents, picked up a PlayStation controller, and switched over to Metal Gear Solid. On the screen, it looked like some nerd had just wet himself while the hardened spy paid no heed to the incessant rants of “Japanese anime,” whatever those were.


The image cut out, but Squirt kept playing. An audio recording began to play, but only the party could hear it. “Hello! Thank you for agreeing to bring this child Christmas Cheer, whether you consented or not. As you know, some unknown entity has murdered this world’s Santa. We at the Interdimensional Holiday Committee chose you all as prime candidates to bring about the most holiday cheer for this little boy in these trying times.


“As you’ve likely noticed by now, travel is a bit different here. To ensure accessibility of all life-forms, our world’s Palkia has confined the entire mountain into one space in a manner easy to traverse. You need only think of where you’d like to go, begin to walk there, and you will arrive at your destination. Of course, you can only travel within the confines of the mountain. Any attempts to leave will consolidate all duplicate forms of your bodies at once, causing a minor singularity before you vanish off the face of the multiverse, so please exercise caution on the borders of the enclosure.


“Thank you once again for agreeing to come along, consent notwithstanding, and please make this as close to an enjoyable Christmas as possible for poor little Squirt. We trust that you will all give him the love that the monster that murdered Santa stole from him. That is all. Have a wonderful time!”

 

[IFBench]

"Uh, hi," Gen said to both Squirt and the other arrivals. He clutched his reunion cape as he shivered, longing for home.

 

[DawningWinds]

Nilam's phone buzzed something about no internet as they tried to search for anything about the Interdimensional Holiday Committee. They scanned the room, thinking that they definitively should have checked on that before coming. Fortunately for the rotom, instead of being left unable to access the database where all but the very minimal amount of their knowledge that was downloaded to the phone (including some holiday songs to help set the mood for the party, a handful of Pokédex pages, and how to use the phone- just about everything else of use required cell service or internet to properly access), the Bluetooth connection scan picked up the iPod Photo. Upon connecting to the Bluetooth, Nilam landed their phone gently on top of the Playstation, exited the phone, and happily flew across to inhabit the iPod.

"Hullo, everybody!" the blue phone that no longer contained Nilam broadcasted, as Nilam found that the voice function in the Macro Cosmo's phone that they'd been inhabiting was accessible via Bluetooth. "I'm Nilam, RotoPhone! Or... RotoPod... RotomPod... Roto iPod, presently! Good to meet you, Squirt, and everyone else who I don't yet know the names of but look forward to meeting!" They opted not to mention that they couldn't access the species of many of the guests, either. Upon finding that the iPod had Wikipedia in its entirety downloaded, they'd searched the site for any images resembling the other guests, but of the various species the guests were, it only had a dedicated page on Squirtle, Mew, and Mewtwo, leaving them unsure on most of the other guests species.

 

[Tanuki]

“Whoah!” Squirt shouted as he hopped up, abandoning his controller and the game. “A robopod? I’ve never met someone like you before! You were in that phone?”Squirt went to look at the phone, clearly debating in his head if touching it would invade Nilam’s privacy.

The iPod proved painful and slow to navigate. Even from within, it only allowed input analogous to its clickwheel based interface. Worse, the monochrome display made any image with more than two tones a nightmare to behold. While wikipedia likely had at least some page on any of the pokémon present, traversing it took ages. This trapped Nilam in their predicament for some time, but they would be able to find the requisite information eventually.

 

[Starlight Aurate]

Tabitha blinked several times and yawned as he raised his head and shook his fur--

Fur?

He bolted to his feet--oh, crap--he was a Mightyena!

His heart raced. How did this happen? Was this one of Team Aqua's ploys? Was Courtney's crazy curse infectious and turn people into Pokemon? And where was his Mightyena? Where was Maxie? Where was the rest of his team?

He looked around; almost everyone else here was a Pokemon, too, except--oh, gosh, what was that thing?! It looked like a human and a Scyther had been combined into a single being: a girl with a Scyther-shaped head and blades along her arms walked around awkwardly on legs that Tabitha assumed were awkwardly-shaped beneath her baggy pants.

Tabitha repressed a shudder and glanced at the TV. Who was this "Santa" they mentioned had died? What did that have to do with Christmas? Tabitha's family had never observed Christmas, but he heard of people celebrating the birth of a "Christ" who was to redeem humanity. What did a fat man with a white beard have to do with this? He certainly didn't look divine--but Tabitha knew as well as anyone that looks can be deceiving.

He glanced at everyone else in the room. He had been so accustomed to taking charge--but this wasn't his team, they weren't his grunts, and he couldn't just try bossing people around. It had been so long since he had been around anyone other than his teammates that he wasn't sure how to properly interact with others. And he had to cheer up a baby Squirtle? Tabitha had always wanted to get married, start a family and be a dad, but how on earth was he supposed to "bring Holiday cheer" to a baby Pokemon?

He sighed. He had done a lot in life, but none of his assignments on Team Magma had ever prepared him for this.

 

[windskull]

The vaporeon stepped inside, casually looking the building over with a cool, neutral expression. His gaze landed on the TV, and the end of his tail twitched siltly. "What strange technology you have. Perhaps it would be worthwhile for me to look it over later. My society is always looking for ways to improve the lives of the pokemon around us..."

 

[Namohysip]

A strange haze covered the ground nearby, and two bright eyes peered out from the shadows. Ethereal giggling followed, and then a Mew--purple fur, black eyes, and white irises, complete with a spaded tail--popped out and crawled underneath the couch. "This place is pretty co--" she cleared her throat. She hacked out what appeared to be a giant hairball, which fizzled into more sparkling darkness. "Pretty cool! Oh, hey, my voice is back to normal. Took long enough."

Giggling, Darkwhite squeezed closer to anybody who would make eye contact with her. "And who're you?" the strange Mew asked. "I'm Darkwhite. No clue why I'm here but this place is nifty!"

 

[Equitial]

...

Mewtwo blinked, and a mundane Pokemon was touching his hand. He yanked away from the contact, though the mundane had already disappeared. He expanded his Psychic fielding. Wonderful. He had accepted the invitation in amusement thinking it couldn't actually do anything to him. Alas, so many surprises in this world. The only paltry silver lining to these unfortunate circumstances was a continued reassurance that he had not outgrown this world quite quite yet.

Now who was responsible for this inconvenience? Two large masses of engery -- Legendary size. One of the culprits, was that Mew? Did they actually follow up on their threat of a "holiday"?

Someone teleported him again, inside some sort of dwelling. Definitely Mew and the unfamiliar Legendary, no doubt a "friend". Though now that he poked more at the Mew-energy, it didn't seem exactly like them. Mewtwo flicked his tail, turning his attention to his physical surroundings. Mew hadn't physically formed yet. Mewtwo was otherwise surrounded by mundanes.

But the other Legendary...

To ensure accessibility of all life-forms, our world’s Palkia has confined the entire mountain into one space in a manner easy to traverse... Any attempts to leave will consolidate all duplicate forms of your bodies at once, causing a minor singularity before you vanish off the face of the multiverse, so please exercise caution on the borders of the enclosure.

Mewtwo directed an unamused wave of telepathy at this "Palkia". Maybe-Mew, maybe-not, still hadn't come out. The Squirtle babbled on about some some human who had died. And why was Mewtwo supposed to care? Mundanes died, sad sad, but Mewtwo had no part in it. And it was a human. He didn't have time for this.

With a jerk of his tail, he teleported. He went to the edge of the mountain enclosure. With a grunt, he pressed a wave of energy against it and... drats. He couldn't get out.

Oh, he was greatly unamused.

He teleported back to the room, projecting his displeasure to all the gathered beings. He jabbed more intently at the two Legendaries -- one who was not his Mew at least -- with an air of annoyed questioning.

Explain.

 

[Fusion]

A hulking, sleeping mass of red and white fur suddenly came to life. Despite his size, he was fairly easy to miss. Probably thanks to him blending in with all the decorations. The rest of his body started to wake up as well; he loudly cracked his neck and rolled his shoulders, flexed his paws and stretched his lanky arms, twisted from side to side to pop his spine, let out a yawn and smacked his lips, and flicked his tiny tail, just to be sure he still could. The trip here was... less than pleasant for him. Even if he couldn't remember any of it. Like whenever he visited that world connected to other worlds.

Vibrant, beastly, pink eyes looked over the other victims of this "holiday endeavor," none of whom he recognized. That was good and bad. On the positive side, no one knew who he was so he could do as he pleased, but he also had nothing on anyone else, or more importantly, what they were capable of. It'd be like being trapped in a constant, silent stalemate to see who would be a threat. His guard would have to be on high, ready for anything.

Or... he could take the advice he was given and... enjoy himself, and be friendly.

Giggling, Darkwhite squeezed closer to anybody who would make eye contact with her. "And who're you?" the strange Mew asked. "I'm Darkwhite. No clue why I'm here but this place is nifty!"

Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long for someone else to do it for him. This "Darkwhite" didn't have any clue what personal space was, apparently.

"I am Lee," the wolf said, pushing the feline aside.

He teleported back to the room, projecting his displeasure to all the gathered beings. He jabbed more intently at the two Legendaries -- one who was not his Mew at least -- with an air of annoyed questioning.

Explain.

Having someone's annoyance forced into his mind was more of a comfort to Lee than most would expect. He turned to the... whatever the hell that Pokemon was and grinned. "I believe we're here because of a murder. Or a vacation. Or perhaps just to annoy you? I'd be fine with either of the three."

 

[Equitial]

One of the mundanes was trying to talk to him. Some Rock Pokemon. The Pokemon ran their eyes over Mewtwo, did something with their teeth at him.

"I believe we're here because of a murder. Or a vacation. Or perhaps just to annoy you?

No matter the case, it all amounted to the latter. Mewtwo merely wanted this to end as soon as possible.

Trapped in a room with mundanes. The other Legendaries could have at least had the decency to keep mortals out of his business. Twitching his tail, Mewtwo gathered energy and flared it around him. He radiated an aura of Psychic power, hoping the mundanes had enough sense to recognize he far surpassed all of them combined in every relevant manner.

His flicked his eyes briefly over the Rock-type in particular, projecting more telepathy to make his intentions clear. He didn't care about the mundanes. He cared only about the Legendaries because clearly they were the ones responsible. Haha, funny prank. Get it over with now.

He would suggest to all the mundanes not to make this experience more trying to his patience.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

What the complete and utter fuck was this.

Jesse looked around the whole of the mountain, pacing from location to location in the blink of an eye, his whole body a furious scowl of discontent. His body... he was still a delphox, even though there were humans on that television and some kind of fucking human hybrid in his cage with him.

He shouldn't be here. This wasn't right. This was like when he woke up on the ridge as a braixen all over again, only this time he was certain he hadn't given his goddamn consent to this shit. Why the fuck was he here?

Was this some mystery dungeon bullshit? Was this a lucid fever dream? Was he fucking dead, and this was some weird fucking purgatory for his sins?

The boy. Squirt. Was he real? Was he...

It didn't matter. He needed to get home, to finish what he'd started. First he had to puzzle this fucking thing out. Even if he played along and tried to give the kid a good time (again, WHY HIM??), there was a FUCKING MURDERER on the loose. Odds were it was another of the motherfuckers on the fucking goddamn mountain with him shit shit shit shit

And oh! Just to make matters worse, he couldn't read any of their fucking minds. Brilliant. At least he still had his caustic personality and his burning brain to apply to the problem.

What to do?

Jesse stepped from the slopes back to the squirtle's location. Was the boy... human? Who fucking knew.

"Hey kid," he said, trying to keep his voice soft amid his rising panic. "It's Squirt, right? I'm Jesse. You wouldn't happen to know how we all got here, would ya?"

 

[Fusion]

He radiated an aura of Psychic power, hoping the mundanes had enough sense to recognize he far surpassed all of them combined in every relevant manner.

His flicked his eyes briefly over the Rock-type in particular, projecting more telepathy to make his intentions clear. He didn't care about the mundanes. He cared only about the Legendaries because clearly they were the ones responsible. Haha, funny prank. Get it over with now.

Lee's grin stretched even further. Might as well assert his own sense of dominance, as a means of... friendly banter. Sure. A thick, viscous aura of Darkness seeped from his body as he kept his eyes locked on Mewtwo. "I see we have a prideful one among us. What fun," he snickered.

 

[Tanuki]

"I believe we're here because of a murder. Or a vacation. Or perhaps just to annoy you? I'd be fine with either of the three."

Squirt squeezed his controller before dropping it. He curled up against the couch to look down at the ground. Memory cast a shadow over his expression. The illusion left.

This wasn’t an impromptu joining of new friends. This was an interdimensional holiday support system. They were all doing him a favor at their own expense. They must all really care.

He started to smile and said, “Thanks again for coming. It really means a lot.”

He radiated an aura of Psychic power, hoping the mundanes had enough sense to recognize he far surpassed all of them combined in every relevant manner.

Squirt blinked, eyes wide. He completely froze with his jaw on the floor. “Wow!” he shouted, elated. “That was so cool! Do it again! What other cool stuff can you do?”

"It's Squirt, right? I'm Jesse. You wouldn't happen to know how we all got here, would ya?"

“Hi!” he replied. “The Interdimensional Holiday Committee found the best friends they possibly could to have a party with me! They’re interdimensional because they can enter dimensions ‘n’ all.” He jiggled with excitement, almost dancing. “We’ll all have so much fun!”

 

[Equitial]

He radiated an aura of Psychic power, hoping the mundanes had enough sense to recognize he far surpassed all of them combined in every relevant manner.

Of course he should have known better than to hope. All he wanted was to spend today and his next forseeable years in solitude, meditating or flying over deserted wilds or curling up in a patch of sunlight to take a nap. Unfortunately, someone decided otherwise.

He let these sentiments broadcast to the room as he drifted around, examining his physical surroundings. He ignored the preening Rock-type and the Squirtle child. He lashed his tail as he glanced over a line of glass figures of a bulky human in red clothes "decorating" a shelf. Were there humans here? Surely Mew (though he was no longer sure his Mew had set this up) wouldn't have put humans near his presence.

 

[Fusion]

“Hi!” he replied. “The Interdimensional Holiday Committee found the best friends they possibly could to have a party with me! They’re interdimensional because they can enter dimensions ‘n’ all.” He jiggled with excitement, almost dancing. “We’ll all have so much fun!”

This wasn’t an impromptu joining of new friends. This was an interdimensional holiday support system. They were all doing him a favor at their own expense. They must all really care.

He started to smile and said, “Thanks again for coming. It really means a lot.”

Lee winced slightly. "Yeah, sure kid," he said, putting on some sort of smile. "Er... Squirt." Babysitting a kid so young felt like a punishment. Even if he was familiar with it, that didn't mean Lee would enjoy it. Lee didn't know how to not cause the kid to have a fit of existential dread, so he left the Squirtle to that Delphox. Seemed like a nice enough guy, definitely trustworthy with kids.

"What do we do now, then? We have a mur--" Lee cleared his throat. "--a job to do, right? Do we just... enjoy each other's company?" he shuddered.

 

[Namohysip]

"I can think of a lot of ways to enjoy company," Darkwhite said, prodding at the couch for something invisible. Then, she disappeared, reappearing a few seconds later with some snacks and finger foods. "Like this! Who doesn't like food?"

 

[Equitial]

Do we just... enjoy each other's company?" he shuddered.

Mewtwo certainly agreed with this sentiment. Fine, he would listen to the mundane Pokemon since the Legendaries weren't forthcoming, but why would he ever want to engage in idle chitchat with anyone. He was a solitary being. The only reason why he endured Mew and the other Legendaries was because they were too powerful to remove without hassle. He never appreciated distraction and inane babbling and --

"I can think of a lot of ways to enjoy company," Darkwhite said, prodding at the couch for something invisible. Then, she disappeared, reappearing a few seconds later with some snacks and finger foods. "Like this! Who doesn't like food?"

...

...Well, if he was going to be here he might as well take what comforts came to him.

He discreetly teleported over a plate of shrimp and deviled eggs. He slunk into a corner to eat.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Okay, time to start asking questions. And try not to swear in front of the kid. How old was the little fucker, anyway? Like, ten? Ten years old? He didn't fucking know, gods.

"Okay, Squirt. So this Committee, they have some kinda particular interest in you, huh. How come they're goin' to the trouble of collectin' us fuc– us folks to be here? Where is 'here' anyways? Is this yer home, or somethin'? Nice place."

Fuckin' snowy place, is what it was. He didn't have much appetitite, but he took something edible from the shadow-devil critter with a quick "thank ye kindly."

 

[Tanuki]

Unfortunately, someone decided otherwise.

He let these sentiments broadcast to the room

Squirt crossed his arm, brow furrowed in confusion. “Hang on, that’s not right.” He squinted at Mewtwo as if to better focus on this clear rejection of reality. “The process was entirely voluntary. Once primary party candidates were discovered, they scanned the multiverse for the prime specimen for parties. If the best candidate would likely decline, their most similar peers within the multiverse to decide what best accommodations would lead to your agreement in the operation. All that you would want as reimbursement for this venture was discovered and supplied without having to bother you with the process. If this final simulation seems to contradict your own autonomy, it is only because you lack the knowledge of all that has been offered to you.”

Then, she disappeared, reappearing a few seconds later with some snacks and finger foods. "Like this! Who doesn't like food?"

“SHRIMP!” he shouted. “Those are my favorite!” He downed over a handful in seconds, the universe itself apparently preventing the skewers interrupting his ravenous consumption. “Thmnks!” He beamed a bright smile.

Where is 'here' anyways? Is this yer home, or somethin'?

Squirt snickered, “I’m a water type! It’s way too cold for me up here.” He collected the snowboard he left outside and returned it to the rental shop with a generous tip placed atop a pile of them. With that done, he never left the living room, so had no need to return. “The committee just found the best place for the best party! What do you like to do at parties?”