Pokémon The Devil You Know

[K_S]

I can wait for you to finish then hunt down the comic for a compare contrast after the fact...

 

[Joshthewriter]

Though future chapters will require knowledge of characters like Hareta and Mitsumi so look them up if you're unfamiliar.

Alright, so I’ll just get this out of the way first. You should not, under any circumstances, be telling readers “go look up these characters if you don’t know them.”

It’s a terrible look. I want you to tell me the story, not be told that I can’t understand it without having read ancillary material (especially the manga considering it’s probably the least known of the canons).

I’ll give you this example: I use tertiary Rocket characters like Vicious and Domino in my fics, but its not necessary for you to have seen them before at all. I tell you what you need to know about them in the story itself.

The first thing Saturn had heard was that Cyrus hadn't put up a fight.

I love this as an opener. I don’t know the Manga, but this tells me that it’s after their big defeat and that things may have gone differently than the canon I know (which is a huge plus to me lol). I also really like the way it sets our POV character out in front of us right off the bat.

there had been no 01, not after Mitsumi left,

Here’s what I meant. I know you’re probably not trying to bog the fic down, but if this character is important, then their significance should be explained in the fic (even if it’s not explained at this point).

As it is, it does make me want to know more about her and why she left Galactic. Perfect opportunity for you to expand on it at some point for readers who aren’t familiar with her.

Charon's recent actions, how prepared he was for everything, told Saturn that this was something Charon had planned well in advance, as if he knew Cyrus's failure as surely as any other element of the plan.

I kinda wondered why Charon apparently took over Galactic after Cyrus lost. It never really got explained, and the fact that everyone disliked him made it more confusing.

That being said, Charon just figuring it out and manipulating events in his favour works as a villain trope.

thought that anybody would see him again so soon was...difficult.

Lol, the matter of fact-ness of this makes me smile. Like, Saturn isn’t wrong that people probably want to kill Cyrus, but he’s probably not wrong that some would want to see him for other reasons.

He's just 'Cyrus' now. Some pathetic little wretch who thought he could play god.

Ho boy, Charon really doesn’t think much of Cyrus, eh?

Saturn wanted to deck Charon full in the face,

Me too, Saturn. Me too. The smug little prick seems to need it.

The key was as light as any other but for some reason, Saturn felt a weight to it that went beyond the thin metal.

Well, being entrusted with the safety of a man who you served unquestionably and attempted to kill you all the same (probably some other “bad boss” shit as well) would undeniably be A heavy burden to bear.

Alright, so overall I thought this was an excellent piece. The concept of following a defeated villain after their defeat is great, and other than a quibble about looking up characters, I honestly don’t have an issue with anything here.

This is a great fic idea with great potential for fantastic character work. Hopefully catnip or another event brings me back soon (and hopefully I’m not as depressed next time lol)!

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Glad you liked it! The part about looking characters up was really just for this forum since a prior DPA fic had people wondering if Mitsumi (a major character in the manga) was an original character so I wanted to avoid any further confusion. That intro doesn't exist in any other posting.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

And Saturn had his own part to play. If Rowan was at the Canalave Library, it would put Hareta there too, almost certainly. He bet. He hoped. He guessed.

But bets and hopes and guesses were all the intel he could have. Rowan was a well-known figure and was easy to track, at the very least, but everything else was uncertain.

It was the most he had.

"All right!" he told himself with a clap of his hands. As enthusiastic as he could pretend to be, he forced a commanding expression and entered the commons room. "All right!" It was in the same tone he had said it to himself, but none of the assembled grunts knew that.

They turned towards him, quizzically. Some of them saluted, but still seemed confused.

Every eye was on Saturn, every identical eye, identical contact lenses, identical colors matching identical wigs over identical uniforms. A sea of conformity, trained to obey as if they were the drones of a Vespiquen. Idly, Saturn wondered why Cyrus never thought to train one. They had so much in common. "All right!" he repeated, but this time the tone was different, flatter, more blunt. "I have a special mission for whoever among you has a Golbat!"

None of them would have a Crobat, after all.



He was able to assemble a surprisingly populous force, though he suspected it was less due to the availability of Golbat and more to do with a want to get away from Charon for a few hours. The only thing he had planned for them in his current incarnation of what passed as a plan was to act as guards in case anything surprising happened. Oh, and to be enough of a noticeable force to draw attention to Galactic's continued presence in Sinnoh. And to get the attention of everybody in the library. And probably any other number of things that could come up at any given time. But whatever came up, he could handle it, or at least that was what Saturn told himself.

The more he drew attention to Galactic, the sooner the International Police would stop dragging their feet over the bombing incident and finally do something about it. They had waited long enough, and it spoke poorly of however they were run if this was how they handled a terrorist threat. It wasn't as though Galactic was hard to find, but all they had sent was a small detachment led by a fool and a child, to Stark Mountain of all places. An entirely different region, likely with entirely different laws, but it shouldn't take that long. Not nearly this long.

And that Saturn was hoping for the International Police, hoping for anybody, to invade the Galactic base was a twisting knot in his stomach that he had to force himself to ignore. Just so long as what the team had been distorted into no longer existed. It would be better to have no Team Galactic at all than to permit it to continue on as nothing but Charon's bloody plaything.

Maybe, he thought, this was what Cyrus had felt. Better to terminate the world, all creation, than to permit it to exist as a den of strife and suffering. No, one organization couldn't possibly stand on the same level as the concept of existence. But it was, perhaps, the same sort of rationale that had driven Cyrus to such an extreme.

This was an extreme too, wasn't it?

The flurry of the bat swarm battalion--a name being spoken by several of the grunts, in eager tones--clouded the skies for the land below. Saturn could hear people exclaim as they passed over Jubilife City. Good, his plan was working. They could have easily taken a transport and simply crossed the channel to Canalave, but he had explained it to the grunts as sending a message. That Team Galactic still existed and could expend any force they cared to. At least they had believed it.

Maybe it was this easy to lie after all. Somehow it felt good, and that was dangerous.

No, he would have to channel that into something more productive. Something considerably more than anything he had done in his life.

Would people expect him to go even further? Once this was done, if things played out like he wanted, would they want so much more from him than they ever had before? Success could destroy him and yet it was the only possible outcome. Anything else was unthinkable.

The latest intel showed that Rowan was still inside the library, and hacking the security cameras in the rare book section had showed that he was indeed accompanied by not only Hareta and Mitsumi, but a wiry yellow haired kid that had been identified as the Tower Tycoon's son. Chances are he would be a powerful trainer as well, if someone as competitive as Palmer had raised him. He vaguely remembered the boy being on the Spear Pillar with the others, but couldn't think of anything he had accomplished there.

At least the target was still in position, but the thought of encountering Hareta again made Saturn's blood boil. A squeak from his Golbat startled him into realizing that he had tightened his fist, and he relaxed his hand enough to still hold on in flight.

Was that caring, he wondered. Was it compassion or just good sense? After the events of Lake Valor, Cyrus had chided him for treating his Gallade so cruelly, but it wasn't as though Cyrus had encouraged compassion. If you view your pokémon as tools, he had told Saturn, then treat them as such. You do not abuse a hammer, or else it will be unable to serve its purpose. A bent nail cannot hold fast.

It was a striking lesson, and yet utterly devoid of emotion.

He knew Cyrus had emotions, despite claims to the contrary, despite claiming that emotions only caused pain. And yet the man had said before that he did not, that he had banished them as unnecessary. That was impossible, wasn't it? And even if it wasn't, it still didn't apply to Cyrus. He would smile, he would get angry, he would demonstrate emotion in a thousand different ways and still deny they dwelled within him.

He was saving a hypocrite, and a madly dangerous one at that, simply because he was preferable to the alternative.

No, Saturn's thoughts drifted around, that wasn't why. He was saving Cyrus because he was still faultlessly loyal, despite all reason and rationality.

Saturn knew that Cyrus was well aware of this, and moreover so was Charon. The twin spectres of both "Cyrus is lying to you he hasn't changed at all" and "Charon is watching your every move why are you being so overt?" hung over him, no matter how he tried to keep his thoughts on only his mission.

"Did you say something, commander?" a nearby voice called.

"Did I?" He must have voiced his thoughts aloud. The Golbat troops were too far apart for him to have been properly heard, though, and he took comfort from that.

"Saw your mouth moving like you were talking!" The grunt had to project considerably. "Thought I missed something."

Saturn shook his head and turned his gaze to the approaching city. He would have to keep himself from getting so lax. This time he had said it where he couldn't be heard, but he couldn't afford to drop the ball at the last second. His anxiety was wearing on him, and he couldn't give in.

That anxiety, he knew, along with years of strife and subservience, had eroded at him like a stone in a river, life passing him by as he rested in his niche, and now that he was high and dry, it was disgustingly unfamiliar. It may well have been an entirely new world; not the one Cyrus was after, but something foreign to either of them.

If he couldn't feel, none of this would matter. But it wouldn't do anybody any good either, no matter how much Cyrus insisted otherwise. To have no suffering would be meaningless in a world where nobody could enjoy peace. But a world of pure suffering, the world Charon was angling towards, was even worse. It may have purpose, but it was a purpose of greed, turning all against each other for the aggrandizement of a scant few.

A hollow life or a life lived in fear. Saturn couldn't let either of those happen, and holding those tides away beat down on his back as if it was a physical burden.

They had forced him into this position, to play mediator for two lunatics, to pick the lesser of two evils, and it was a damn good thing that Hareta awaited at the end of this because he wasn't about to let his anger and frustration just get bottled up inside. That was Cyrus's domain, and even he had challenged the brat on multiple occasions. Hareta would make the perfect idiot-shaped punching bag.

And Saturn had gotten considerable stronger. His Gallade was sharper than ever, he had added a Magmortar to his roster. They were an unbeatable pair, and it was going to be an utter blessing to finally be able to trounce that brat.

The idea of defeating the very person whose strength he was trying to recruit was, perhaps, a contradictory one, and it played at the back of his mind, but like every other doubt he had, it went ignored. Besides, anyone he found only needed to be strong ENOUGH. They didn't need to be entirely unbeatable, only someone that could cut through Charon's forces and defeat whatever the old man had in store.

Which itself was a complete unknown. Charon apparently had the perfect weapon to combat a specific member of the International Police, but that was about all Saturn knew.

He signaled for his cloud of bats to start their descent, and grinned as he heard the shouts and screams from below. There was, he had to admit, something fun about being able to instill fear simply by existing. Golbat already did so inherently, especially in great numbers, and taking control of that phobia in others gave Saturn quite an inappropriate but heady rush. He let himself smile and was positive beyond all doubt that it was a very wicked one indeed.

A window on the side of the top floor opened, the inhabitants peering out to see what was going on. Several people had gathered, and it confirmed Saturn's intel.

Hareta was indeed there. This would be utterly delicious revenge.



"Are...you all right, commander?"

Saturn was still twitching slightly from the massive electric shock that Hareta's Minun had attacked him with. The weakling-seeming newborn mouse had proven to be a powerhouse, and Saturn didn't know if it was from Hareta's influence or Kaisei's. After all, this had to be the result of the egg that Kaisei had given the boy at the league.

"Commander?"

The concern in the grunt's voice grated on Saturn's nerves. Under most other circumstances, he would be far more receptive, perhaps even grateful. But at the time, he had only to keep focus on keeping his hand tight around Golbat's leg.

The grunt didn't ask again. That was fine. That was more than fine. He had delivered the message he meant to, planted the seed in Hareta's mind. And Hareta was an unpredictable element in everything he did, but he could never resist the promise of an excellent battle.

Something else pulled at his attention, but rather than a grunt crossing a personal line, it was a com line beeping. Saturn stuffed his headset around his ear with his free hand and waited to be addressed.

"My boy!" Charon, his thick voice in a chaotic way, "you'll never guess what's happening!" After a very brief pause, too quick for Saturn to even try, Charon continued. "It's the International Police! They think they can even make a dent in our defenses! We'll need you to shore things up inside just in case. And bring those grunts back with you! You picked a hell of a time to take a battalion, my god." His tone was the very definition of annoyance. "Why, I'd almost think you were working against me."

"I can assure you," Saturn said as dully as he possibly could, ignoring another twitch, "that everything I'm doing is to keep the team safe." It was the truth, and nothing could shake that. It just so happened that he and Charon had different definitions of what that meant.

"Yeah well, hurry back. We need to make an example of these upstarts before they learn too much. Keep them at arm's length." And the call suddenly cut out.

It was uncertain to Saturn if the call's hastened conclusion was due to an emergency situation or if Charon simply didn't have the patience to continue speaking to him. Either way, they had to get back.

To think that the International Police had waited that long. The league bombing, or the attempt at it, had been so long ago that Saturn figured they would have overlooked it, though he couldn't figure out why. Thousands of people and pokémon would have died if Charon's plan had come to fruition, all to serve his own ego and establish himself as a criminal mastermind, and yet in that time there was no rumbling of police involvement. But then, nobody had ever said that the International Police were good at what they did.

In a way it suited Team Galactic. Galactic was shockingly good at what they did if one only considered Cyrus. Even Saturn's success rate was quite low. He had destroyed Lake Valor and captured Azelf, but lost a subsequent battle and was fired on the spot.

His memory of that time was spotty, and thinking of it wound through him like a virulent toxin, stabbing from the inside. He couldn't let go, not of Golbat, not that high up, but he couldn't let go of the memory of his utter humiliation at Lake Valor either.

He had a tendency to hang on. To memories, to pain, to his devotion to a man who had tried to kill everyone, to his bitterness. The sooner he could let go, he knew he would be happier.

The only thing he really *had* to hold onto was Golbat. Everything else was his own choice.

Except...he realized something strange. There was a choice remaining, and it was one granted to him by the invaders. If he could take this brief chance, it could end everything in his favor. And suddenly everything seemed as clear as the view from Coronet's peak.

"All right!" he shouted to the flock of grunts, the sudden sound startling his Golbat. "I've received word that the base in Veilstone is under attack! The moment we arrive, we begin to battle, so everyone is to be prepared!"

The grunts around him murmured in surprise, some expressing gratefulness that they hadn't battled in Canalave, others griping that they hadn't packed their strongest pokémon. Saturn doubted any of them had anything that could be considered truly "strong", but it was relative anyway. Any obstacle they could throw at the International Police would be worthwhile.

If they could divert attention entirely on Charon, Saturn could slip in and free Cyrus without notice. And then Cyrus would have no choice, would he? He had claimed he wanted to give up, and even if the claim had been as false as Cyrus's vows to save the world, the former leader would be in no position to object.

Saturn could force honesty out of the man, but only if he had the backing of the invading officers. It was a window that wouldn't be open forever, and he had to use every available inch of it.

Finally, by sheer chance, dumb luck, and an unanticipated amount of actual planning on Saturn's part, things were falling into place.



The assault on the base was visible from the air the moment the swarm passed into Veilstone, but Saturn was more interested in what he saw closer to the warehouse. "Go on ahead and find out what our leader wants!" he ordered. Whoever the grunts took that to mean was on them.

Landing at the side of the warehouse, he approached the target and waited. B-2 was there, looking as though he had been looking forward to this his entire life. "Sir!"

"Report."

B-2 saluted, the strong gesture seeming to wobble his considerable rear from the shock wave. "Sir I was able to track down Jupiter. Just like you said--my Skuntank-attracting abilities are unparalleled! Found at least five of them before I got her. One was even red!"

Under less hectic, less serious circumstances, Saturn would have had several questions, none of which were comfortable, likely starting with 'at least five? You couldn't tell?' and followed quickly by 'did you capture the shiny?', but there was no time for any of that. "Excellent. Where is she?"

"Awaiting your orders inside, sir. And Mars is here too!" B-2's smile broadened. "Turns out they found each other and were keeping each other safe."

Under less hectic, less serious circumstances, Saturn would have felt relieved, but there was no room, no time to relax. "Excellent. I'll--"

But his instruction was caught short by a sharp string of beeps. Before he could even properly place his headset back on, Charon's voice cut through. "Saturn, where the hell are you? You'd better not be skipping town on me!"

To the side, B-2's eyes widened, his fists clenched and mouth tightened.

Saturn, on the other hand, took it in stride. If Charon didn't know where he was, it meant he wasn't watching any security cameras. And that meant that all Saturn had to do was tell the truth. "Sir, I've sent most of the detachment back to the base. I'm currently leading a faction in from the warehouse."

Charon chuckled, a surprisingly casual sound given the tension of a moment ago. "Clever lad! Didn't think you had it in you. If you're successful in this, you'll be rewarded." A click deadened the line, and the two agents were alone again.

B-2 waited to say anything, making sure his words wouldn't be heard by anybody but Saturn. "...you really just told him what we were doing." His usually hyper voice was slow and breathy.

Saturn sighed deeply before smiling, though the smile faded by the end. "Yeah. But not why. He's got no idea what we're really doing. Or even where we are, or else he wouldn't ask with that fervency."

"That makes sense..." B-2 sighed. It was jarring to see that sort of distress on the normally hyper and chaotic agent. "I just...don't know what else to do. It's stupid to wish Cyrus was here but I still do."

With so much chaos around them, it had been vital for Saturn to keep his cards close to his chest, but with B-2 and the other officers at hand, it was finally time to show what he had. "I think it's time," Saturn's smile returned as he opened the door to the warehouse "that you hear about who's being held in the base."

 

[K_S]

Love how everything Saturn values is boiled down to "a hope'. Snorts.

In that he's not too dissimular to many of the Manga protagonists who get backed into that same corner.

I imagine all the volenteers were all "get away from Charon, sign me up" and didn't even look at the fine print, with a few more of the desperate doing under-the-table mon trades to have those Golbats on hand...

You know things are bad if the crime lord's second in comand is hoping Interpol will save their bacon. I'm imaging a swarm of grunts doling up Charon in a bow and shoving him to the fore in the case of a takedown, before booking it for themselves.

And seriously what is Interpol doing besides twiddling their fingers?

I love how you can see the desperation squeezing Saturn's composure out in bits and pieces. This is a man falling apart and holding on by his teeth and nails, and it shows. I'm surprised the grunts aren't reacting to that more...

I'd like to host a funeral wake for Saturn's dignity here, beat by a Minum has got to be one of the worst ways to go, especially considering the heavy hitters on his team...

And of course Charon's going to be right on hand to buzz himand irritate him further. Saturn is catching no breaks. While Saturn's having a bit of an "a-ha" moment I'd say the only part of his idea that's grounded in reality is his grasp of his own flaws. AKA his clinginess to things he really should not be holding on to. If Cyrus hasn't spoken after Charon's incarceration/torment Saturn's got a bit of a reality check coming if mere coppers, part of the world order that Cyrus seemed to hate (or view as too flawed to matter) is going to make Cyrus become chatty.

Gotta love the false optimism being flaunted here. ANd though subbdued you gotta love that in this madhouse of a Team he's got a few iotas of atention to be releived that Mars made it. And that his other Executives are guarding each other's backs. I'm sure the attendent feels will come out more front and center when his world's less falling apart.

Though I do have to wonder are they helping in the assault with Interpool or just bailing out their won resources or just caught in the cross fire of a Region's TEam going to hades courtousy of CHaron's mismanagment. All options feel perfectly valid since last I remember Charon was gunning for them for crocked up "disloyalty" charges.

As for telling B-2, winces, I get Saturn's desperate, but I wonder what the reaction of letting Mr. chatterbox/running gag get a hold of that information, and if it trickles down to the lower levels, is going to be.

As always thanks for sharing this tale, I enjoyed the most recent update.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

That smile had to vanish entirely soon after. Reuniting with the other commanders, seeing them safe for the time being, was encouraging, but it wasn't the end of the road, and it was a dangerous road indeed.

They had to split up again. B-2, the only one of the group able to maneuver the grounds without attracting undue attention, was sent to find Hareta. The promise of seeking out Cyrus would no doubt be irresistible to the battle-happy twerp, and with Kaisei still in the base, Hareta would be even more useful. The fact that B-2 wasn't the dimmest person in the base was also somewhat encouraging, in a darkly comedic way.

And Mitsumi was on her way. Saturn couldn't figure out why, but if they got through this he could ask her. He could be bold, he had learned. He could get to the bottom of things himself.

And if they got through this, he would have allies to aid with enforcing Cyrus's promise. He wouldn't have to stand alone in confronting either Cyrus or Charon.

Mars had smiled at him as they parted, and Jupiter had smirked and told him that they trusted he would succeed. Memories of his shaky legs and wobbly vision when he had gone to have it out Charon after the League incident seemed so long ago, distant and bygone.

In a way, it was a new world after all. Not a wicked one held to Charon's whims that he would betray so long as he came out on top. Not an emotionless one devoid of hate and love alike that Cyrus would have sacrificed everything but himself for. Something entirely removed from that, something that had long since existed for others but had always seemed like a distant star for Saturn.

And now he held that star of confidence and hope in his hand. Just for a moment, he let himself feel the power from it.

But in the midst of a battlefield, even a distant corner of one, it could only be a moment. He had to descend into the fray.





Ensuring that Charon was well occupied was something Saturn had to do himself. He couldn't take any risks.

/"Why, I'd almost think you were working against me."/ Charon's sticky voice resonated in Saturn's head. The man had made his suspicion very clear, and during such a chaotic time, Saturn had to be above reproach.

A sudden sharp pain in his hand suddenly grabbed his attention. He had clenched his fist so hard that his nails had dug into his palm. But that was something he had to overcome, to fight the urge he had to run, or to vomit, or anything else that would take him away from the present danger.

Forcing himself into utter awareness brought a strange sort of serenity, but even that was, paradoxically, a form of detachment. Saturn twisted his face up in a scowl, hoping the displeasure it conveyed would shove his emotions into the present. But it was a mask, not even skin deep.

To check in would be all he needed. That was it. He could leave then, getting the suspicion off his own back. Showing up in the auditorium, putting in an appearance, would make Charon think that he wasn't plotting anything.

"Commander! Do you have a moment?" Some nearby grunts were struggling with a caged pokémon, a Growlithe from what Saturn could tell, and called out to him.

All right, helping out as if nothing was wrong would serve to further his facade. "What do you need?"

"This damn thing won't stay still! We gotta get it to the auditorium and fast." The grunt who seemed to be in charge grabbed the back of the cage, only to be met by a fierce bark. In response, she started to kick at it, but turned to kick the wall instead. "Goddamn stupid dog. Can't even punish it when it's in here."

Saturn's practiced scowl deepened, but he only looked at the containment. It seemed to be outfitted with multiple security measures, including a hefty lock, a tracking chip, and full walls with very few bars that could possibly catch ferocious jaws. It was small enough that the contained Growlithe couldn't use any real attacks, only Leer. Even Roar would be ineffective in there, since the muzzle strapped around its head made it impossible for the Growlithe to fully open its mouth for the necessary effect.

But that didn't stop the imprisoned canine from trying. The determined sounds made its utter hatred very clear, and the frantic wriggling reminded Saturn all too strongly of the abominations he had seen in the lab.

"Wait..." he mused. "This thing is altered, isn't it?"

"Ugh, who cares! Probably!" the grunt in charge exclaimed. "Boss Charon is doing some big confrontation with some international police brat. He had this thing brought in from Hoenn just for the occasion. Too much work if you ask me." She extended an arm and gestured towards the cage with a pointed finger. "I'd just *bang*!, y'know?"

"...I do know." So much violence. All of this would hopefully be over soon enough, and the dullness of the thought was unsettling in a distinctly Cyrus-like way. Somehow, Saturn felt a little more empathy towards his former leader, and he shoved that away from his mind as well. It was an act, he had to keep up the act, he couldn't fall into the act. "Regardless, I'll take this the rest of the way."

The other grunt laughed. "Thanks! You'll be doing us a big favor. God, my arms hurt lugging that thing around."

"Don't say that in front of a commander!" the leader grunt chided. "You'll get dropped down to latrine work."

Saturn shook his head. "It's fine. It's not far. Gallade can do it." He called out the blade pokémon and tapped the cage, prompting a frustrated snarl from inside it. "Hey Gallade, I need you to carry this thing. And you two," he said to the grunts, "go bolster the front lines."

"Yes sir!" they said in unison, saluting just barely out of sync. One of them immediately turned to go, with the other pausing to add "Good luck out there, sir!" before following suit, leaving Saturn and Gallade alone with their target.

He glared down at the ferocious, furious canine, refusing to let his emotions show. How did Cyrus do it all the time? It was a terrible thing to get used to. "Gallade. Hypnosis."

Gallade nodded and focused its glowing gaze on the Growlithe, who wobbled slightly before slumping over. It was too enraged to fully pacify, but it permitted Saturn a closer look.

"So, you belong to that International Police brat..." he mused in a flat tone imitating Cyrus's infamous monotone, but nowhere near as steady. "I imagine this is psychological warfare." He crouched down to peer further in the cage. "I wonder how he tracked you down so quickly. And from Hoenn no less."

The distance would have required very swift action, and the precision of it would mean there could be absolutely no screwups. The tracker was there to ensure that the target was delivered with no diversion. Saturn didn't want to think about what would happen to whoever dragged their feet on taking this to Charon.

But it was there, and so the tracker wasn't needed any more. It was still letting out a signal, and likely the device receiving it was nearby. Saturn was willing to bet that it was somewhere on Charon's person.

A plan began to vaguely swirl together in the back of his mind, but it was nothing that he could grab hold of just yet. He had to verify that most important part first.

"Well," he said, rising to his feet, "pick up the cage and let's go. Can't keep Charon waiting."






"Oh goodie!" Charon was far too enthusiastic at the sight of the caged Growlithe. "Saturn, my boy, I didn't even have to ask. You're so eager to please."

Saturn forced his expression into a dim smile. "Absolutely, sir. You'll always get things done with me around."

"I'll give you this," Charon chuckled as he leaned to investigate the furious beast, "you certainly know how to keep things fresh around here. It's not every day a commander loses to Magikarp." Before Saturn could react, he continued, rising to stretch his back. "But I digress. You're learning to be much more obedient. Soon you'll really be worthy of your rank, and you'll have the world at your feet."

Just how much of that world Charon intended to let anyone else have could likely be measured on the back of a Stunky, and would smell just as heinous. "Yes sir. Um..." It was an artificial insert, as he knew exactly what he wanted to say. "I was thinking. If the invaders make it this far, which I grant you is a big 'if'," He winced and worked it into his presentation, "then they may try to find out where this little guy came from. And I have a feeling you don't want that to happen. So if you have the tracker, I'll go get the data wiped for you."

Charon pondered that for a moment before fumbling in the pocket of his lab coat. "So long as you can do it without getting distracted from the fight. You're...well, you're not the front line, and you're not the last line of defense. Mid line? Whatever." He waved his hand, now holding a small device with a blinking monitor. "Your first duty is to--"

Growlithe barked, as much as it could with the restrictive muzzle, coming out as more of a distorted cacophony from the top of its throat, though the effect was clear. Charon turned to glower at it, and Saturn saw his opening and took it. "Wow!" he exclaimed as he toppled off balance and brought a hand down on Charon's upper back to steady himself. "Wasn't expecting such a noise out of this brat!"

"Expect lesser beings to do anything," Charon chided, brushing Saturn's hand away.

But the tracker was now firmly attached to the underside of the lab coat's collar, and when the elderly commander stood back up, the collar flopped back over, concealing the evidence. "I'm sorry, sir. You were saying?"

Charon harumphed as he turned to face the auditorium. "These foolish beasts have no sense of their place in the world. It's our job to remind them. And that includes little wild upstarts who think they can worm their way into my base. Anyway, your first duty is to go repel any intruders. Pick them off as you see them. Make sure nobody can find Cyrus--some idiot damaged the lock on his door. They didn't seem to get in, though."

Saturn knew better than to reveal that it was likely Kaisei. The man was still roaming the halls somewhere, after all. "When this is over, we'll need to do repairs anyway."

"When this is over, we'll be finding Giratina. That's all there is to it. Then we'll be off to take over the world. You'll have a front-row seat!" He shoved the device into Saturn's hand.

"And Cyrus?"

The old man wobbled his now-free hand in a noncommittal gesture. "Tied up in the trunk, to continue the metaphor. Eh, I might see what Giratina does to him. Haven't quite decided yet. Whatever it is needs to really stand out. Send a message, you know? Or I could just throw him in a pit somewhere. Do you think it would take a lot to install an oubliette in the base?" Seeing Saturn's dour expression, he laughed and patted him sarcastically on the back. "I've got a job to do, and so do you! Go get 'em."

"Yes sir." Saturn saluted with a sharp intake of breath.

Charon returned the salute with a distinctly mocking tone to it before turning on his heel with a sudden burst of speed that Saturn wouldn't have thought possible.

His absence left Saturn alone with his plan. He remained where he was for just long enough to come across as casual, or so he hoped. Maybe it was only his paranoia, overthinking anything that could possibly happen. Maybe he was too casual. Or maybe his nerves were evident to any observer. But no matter. He had some people to meet.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

It was over.

Word had come through that Charon had been arrested. And with the deal Cyrus had signed with the International Police, it marked the complete termination of Team Galactic.

The emblem on his uniform no longer had any meaning, Saturn thought as he traced it with a finger, feeling the threads in lieu of feeling much else. There wasn't much to feel, not the slight chill in the night air, not the merry cries of Mars and B-2 as they ran their excess energy off in the field where only a short time ago they had fought Giratina, not the sense of the weight off his chest that he couldn't quite get used to.

Hareta had run off somewhere, and Mitsumi had followed, and the whole field had gotten a lot quieter.

Jupiter had been spending the most time with Cyrus, making sure he was all right, straightening his clothes, tending to the faint bruises on his wrists, but she had since gotten worn out by the impact of the day and fallen asleep. Saturn noticed she was out of general view, hidden away behind a bush. She would be overjoyed to be able to sleep in a bed again, after her flight from Charon's forces, though that joy would likely be tempered by lingering paranoia.

This left Cyrus alone, and he sat on a fallen log that looked to have been purposefully placed some time ago. His hands were folded on his lap in a manner that had been denied to him when he was bound, and he stared off at nothing in particular.

Saturn approached, but waited until Cyrus looked at him to proceed further. It took over a minute. He wondered if it had taken that long for Cyrus to break from his reverie. "Can I sit with you?"

Cyrus remained silent, but gestured to the space beside him.

The log was splintery and partially rotten but Saturn's uniform was thick enough that it didn't matter. At least it was still good for something, he thought.

They sat there together with nothing spoken. Saturn wondered if Cyrus felt as hollowed out as he did, but could never possibly ask such a thing.

Somewhere in the field, B-2 attempted a cartwheel, only to fall over onto his considerable hindquarters, so Mars picked up his legs and they ran around as a wheelbarrow. As silly as they looked, the carefree nature of it was enviable, and Saturn wondered when the last time was that he had felt anything even close to that joy. All he could think of was some sort of crazed zeal, found in the depths of his all-consuming devotion to Cyrus's carefully cultivated vision.

Eventually, however, Cyrus spoke. "I wanted to thank you. Your devotion and loyalty saved us all, and put a stop to Charon's reign."

Saturn shook his head, still looking away from him. "Don't mistake wanting him gone for any sort of loyalty to you."

Silence again, before Cyrus chuckled softly. "To your fellow commanders. To your fellow Galactics."

"There's no such thing as a Galactic now, Cyrus." Saturn made a point to address him with no title, by his plain name itself. "All of that is gone now."

"By my word, yes." The sighed confirmation carried with it a deep sense of loss, but Saturn noted the wording still placed Cyrus in a position of lingering power, as if he could simply issue another word and expect everyone to reconvene.

They fell silent again. In the distance, some unknown pokémon called out, and another replied. Saturn wondered what they could be talking about.

Cyrus's posture slumped, and his gaze fell to his hands, still in his lap. Out of the corner of his eye, Saturn could see him start several times to say something, but no words came.

It was strange, the silence between them. Cyrus was so rarely quiet when among others that this was unsettling, disturbing in a way that felt almost blasphemous. A mad god with no further prayers or edicts, stilled and powerless.

But Saturn couldn't underestimate him. After everything that had happened, and everything that Cyrus was getting away with thanks to his plea bargain with the International Police, the man still had every opportunity to return to his old ways. There couldn't be any risks, no surrender of guard, no matter how contrite Cyrus claimed to be.

It was clear that he was regretful, but exactly what part of it he regretted was always going to be relegated to mere speculation. And even if he was genuine at the time, the idea that he could relapse and try to assert control again would always be present.

Amidst the cheer and comfort felt by the other commanders, Saturn couldn't help but fear for what lay ahead.

For that time, however, he could sit in silence with a broken man and wait for whatever the world would bring.

The End​

 

[K_S]

Blitz review chapter 9 and 10

At least Saturn had that one moment of happiness before getting thrown teeth first into Galactics downfall. B-2 is a surprising asset all things considered. His status of flunky is basically giving him an invisibility perk. Something i can see Charon and his ego dismissing. I wonder if later Charon realized how pivital the kid was to his downfall.


Nice to see Saturn coming into his own a bit. Granted, being prompted into character growth by "the end of the world as we know it" is a bit extreame... but tha'ts Satun for you.

While you get the sense Mars amd Jupiter like Saturn there is also a strong "we are out" wavelength to them both. I wonder what happens to them both after this Manga arch? Are they ever revisited canonically or do you have any head canons you would like to share?

The fact that Saturn is playing the bait card by distracting Charon says loads about his bravery. The sane-l usuallly book it twenty miles stage right, but Saturn's gamble has him canoodling the madman just to keep the wool over his eyes.

Despite his nerves and the stress making him a wreck.

I'm seeing the canine in a cage as a fitting analogy for Saturn's situation. Though he doesn't seem to overtly be picking up on the thread of symbolism.

Saturn literally planted the tracker like you would a kick me sign. And basically to the same effect considering what interpool, the rouge Galactic executives, and the series protags would really love to do to old Charon.

A what now? (Goes off to research)

oubliette

Yeah, that... creepily... fits. Glad things don't go to Charon's plan.

Normally when the bad times end "its over" is said with a certian amount of jubilation. I can just hear Saturn's exhausted monotone here. Charon being dragged off in cuffs is likely the only highlight to Saturns life right now, considering he lost Galactic and its ties that bound him to the other Executives...

Really, being Galactic, and Cyrus' yes man, was his whole purpose to life. And tha'ts utterly done now. Him watching the youngsters be happy and realize he hasnt been as far back as he can remember is sad. And with the path he's picking, watching Cyrus because he can't tell if that man is really repenting... and seeing those red flags in what most would consider throw away lines... Saturn is really signing up for more pain in the long run with the lean comfort that its going to keep others safe.

You really got to feel for him at the end.

Thank you for sharing this lovely series. As always its been fun!

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Thank you for reading!

We don't know what happens to the Galactic members after the battle with Giratina (incidentally I hope it didn't feel like too much of a cop-out to not have the actual battle in the fic), though I did write some headcanons in a fic called Solar System.

 

[System Error]

Okay, let's see here. Kind of in a writing mood rather than a reading mood, but FFNet is down and I do have to keep pushing myself forward to accomplish my goals with this. So let's do this thing because I haven't reviewed anything of yours here specifically. Also I mixed up Adventure and Diamond and Pearl Adventure, but we'll try it anyway.

C1
- Hey, you know how the saying goes, Saturn. Surrender now or prepare to fight. Clearly, Cyrus didn't want to fight.
- At least it seems he gave some final orders to the guy.
- Landline tends to be one word.
- I'm surprised they didn't just call her Mercury, even as a codename. And oh, I guess it's just alternate Dawn.
- Charon taking over and calling himself #1 is such a Charonish thing to do, I think.
- Ask a stupid question, get asked not to ask a stupid question. Could be worse, I suppose.
- That feeling when you're so tapped for talent you have to rely on an obvious Judas for help. Such can be the life of a criminal team.
- It would certainly be awkward having a chat with Cyrus after the whole tried to end all of existence thing.
- What's there to be threatened about with Charon, anyway? And how'd he end up in charge? Questions to be answered in time I suppose.
- Probably the right thing to do with someone who tried to kill you until you can get a good explanation.
- Hard to feel sorry for Cyrus here, even if Charon is probably breaking the Geneva convention on him.
- Don't let him manipulate you is good advice given the guy.

C2
- Is the advertisement coincidence or CONSPIRACY? And what's it even for? Opening it was a mistake.
- Talk about your micromanagement if every little thing down to posture was being gone into.
- Well if hair presentation wasn't in the guidelines, he has no reason to follow them. Also he needs hair gel.
- I wonder what the grunts think it is.
- Bigness is a weird adjective to be using.
- I guess in the Adventure! verse Cyrus was a little more openly hostile towards his admins.
- Funny, for someone who claimed to be so emotionless, it seems this Cyrus was too petty to resist a battle.
- Something has to be serious about Charon if it's got Saturn cowering.
- I can totally see Cyrus as an edgelord who likes to stay in the dark.
- Neo Galactic, huh? I take it that's an Adventure! thing? Probably Charon's version of it, and the last part pretty much confirms it.
- Cyrus is surprisingly cooperative here. Probably broken.
- The word guff made Saturn guffaw. Sorry, not sorry.
- This goo definitely seems suspect. Or maybe it's just weird jello.
- Open wide for the airplane!
- Misplaced comma when Cyrus ask where the other commanders are.
- Okay there comes Cyrus' attempted manipulations.
- There could be some paragraph breaks at the part where Saturn calls Cyrus out.
- So all this boiled down to Cyrus wanting to be perfect, and now he's realizing how lofty it was, huh? Well, his emotion did get the best of him.
- Emotionless gods are a recipe for bad.

C3
- This chapter kind of opens oddly. Not sure about it. It's different. Might be better served at the end of the previous one.
- Don't quite see Cyrus as the type to freak about bottled water, but I know those who do and Adventures! Cyrus might.
- Maybe the advertisement at the start of the second chapter was for Neo Galactic? It would explain how it got past security, and we don't know what it is.
- Charon is definitely steering it in a different direction than games canon.
- Hm, does Adventures! have a League Tournament or is that just something you added? Looks like there will be a bang either way.
- This seems like a horrible idea on Charon's behalf, because if the advertising is bad enough, they might find something a lot worse than adblock.
- Oh, maybe it isn't a tournament if it was a Champion match there, or whatever.
- Interesting tying in Regigigas with the Red Chain. Actually, interesting using Mr. Slow Start at all.
- Yuck, leftover popcorn sucks. Okay I hate popcorn in general but still. Double yuck?
- Hahahaha get wrecked superlegend?
- Shame there was no phone app on the real ingame Poketch, but I guess it had to be made a regional equipment thing somehow.
- Such a bland goal. World domination. Bah.
- And now he realizes Charon was punning.
- Passing out from shock indeed.
- Not quite the result they were planning. What were they thinking walking in on all the best trainers who were in the region were going to go?
- Better the devil you know than the devil you don't know? Or something? Absolutely what's going on right now.
- What a waste of manpower. Where are they going to find more grunts?
- Money does make the world go round, but how was this supposed to earn them money.
- Like how answer the question got repeated back at him.
- Okay getting wrecked by Karps is pretty funny.
- I could totally see Cyrus using romance to keep a commander in line.
- Oh, there it is, using Cyrus as leverage. Well I wasn't expecting this to go in a shipping direction, but sounds fun.

Hm, ten chapters? Maybe with the asterisk so far? I could manage the rest of that later, I think. Good stuff so far, hope to read more when/if I can.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

I'm glad you like it, even not knowing the actual canon! Thank you for reading!

 

[Tango]

Hi Blackjack!

I'm here to deliver a catnip review for you!

It's been a good while since I last posted a review for you. The last fic of yours I read was well written and had me wondering about all sorts of things. Curious to see what we have here.

(hi this takes place after volume 5 of Diamond and Pearl Adventure! but if you haven't read that, then you should be ok if you know the events of the games. Though future chapters will require knowledge of characters like Hareta and Mitsumi so look them up if you're unfamiliar. I'm going to post a chapter a week!)

I never did get that far in the Pokemon Manga, but I did play Pearl, so hopefully that will suffice at least for chapter 1.

I'll start the word count past this point.

Review word count: 541

Spoiler: Line by Line Reaction

The first thing Saturn had heard was that Cyrus hadn't put up a fight. This information stood on its own for over an hour, leaving Saturn at the mercy of his imagination. The frustrating vagueness of the message curdled in his stomach and sat there in a sickening lump because what it failed to convey was if Cyrus's surrender had left him *alive*, but Saturn had been ordered to remain where he was until further notice, so he could only sit at his desk in a freshly painted office and wonder what was happening in the wider world past his walls.

So he gets to be cooped up equal to the amount of time his loyalty to Cyrus equals. I wonder what length of time that is?

It was nearly midnight when his phone rang again, the heavy conference style land line that seemed out of place in a high tech organization, and the ID was only "01". The way Team Galactic used to be constructed, there had been no 01, not after Mitsumi left, and she had been gone long enough that the number was considered unused. 00 had been Cyrus, something Saturn had figured represented the sun itself, around which everything else revolved. But in the reborn Galactic, 01 referred to the former 09, Charon.

A surprising amount of depth here regarding the caller ID numbers. Not bad!

It was a moment before Saturn answered it, but the ring started to take on an almost bitterly sarcastic tone to it, as if Charon himself was taunting through the line already. Finally he grabbed the receiver. "Saturn here".

"Good, good." Charon's voice was as sickeningly cloying as Saturn had predicted. "Come to the west hallway on the second floor."

That spoke better for Cyrus's chances, at least. "Is he here?"

"Don't ask stupid questions, commander." And the call ended.

Sounds like Charon is an absolute joy of a co-worker

If they had killed their former leader, Charon would have almost certainly sounded far happier than he had. The scientist had always made his dislike of Cyrus very clear, but so long as he kept to his lab and did as he was assigned, Cyrus was content to keep him on the payroll. There had been no question that Charon had been kept in the dark of what Cyrus's true plans had been, but he seemed to have figured it out on his own simply given the nature of the team's studies.

Useful context of Charon & Cyrus.

And he seemed to take it in relative stride as well. Charon's recent actions, how prepared he was for everything, told Saturn that this was something Charon had planned well in advance, as if he knew Cyrus's failure as surely as any other element of the plan.

Charon is giving me vibes of 2nd-in-command now taking things over in Cyrus's absence.

Saturn was there before he knew it, the distraction of his thoughts being almost a time distortion itself. Charon was waiting there, and seemed to be alone, reading something on an electronic tablet. "Sir."

Charon tucked the tablet under his arm. "Heh, commander. I think you'll have a special interest in seeing our guest."

So Cyrus was alive in there after all. Which meant that Saturn would be expected to *speak* to him, something he hadn't considered until that moment. The man had tried to kill them all, and the thought that anybody would see him again so soon was...difficult. Saturn only nodded.

Wait, I'm lost here. Cyrus is here in the scene with Saturn and Charon? If not, how did Saturn reason that Cyrus was alive from this small bit of dialogue? Is it that Charon could ONLY be talking about Cyrus by saying "guest"? If so, why was Saturn so sure when he appears to be completely in the dark about the specifics of this meeting so far?

"Now, hush-hush, of course. Can't let this get out."

"Of course not, sir."

Charon fumbled with a key for a moment before opening a nondescript door. In the layout of the former base, this had been supply closet, so when the entire building was rebuilt it would stand to reason that it would be the same, but now the supply closet was on on the other wall. It was a bit baffling, and Saturn had wondered why such a place would exist, but he couldn't question Charon's intentions without feeling threatened.

Never mind co-workers, sounds like Saturn considers Charon to be above him in rank.

Inside, the room was utterly dark, the only light streaming into it from the hallway, but Saturn could make out a dim figure within. As he got closer to the doorway, he could see that the figure was slumped over and tied to a chair, and closer still could finally make out Cyrus's distinctive hair. "Boss!" he gasped instinctively, but felt Charon's glower even with his back to the man.

Ah, Saturn still prefers Cyrus. I guess that was obvious from Saturn's willingness to 'wait'.

"Not any more." Charon's voice was more upbeat than Saturn would have thought. "He's just 'Cyrus' now. Some pathetic little wretch who thought he could play god. Really, anybody could have told you how it would turn out."

Yep, definitely getting the vibes that Charon is the in-charge villain here.

Saturn wanted to deck Charon full in the face, but found himself taking a fumbling step towards Cyrus. "...Is he all right?"

"Eh, he'll wake up in a few hours."

The commander tried to reach out, though he wasn't close enough to make contact. "W...what will happen when he wakes up?"

Charon tapped the door with the back of his hand. "Sound-proof walls! Hundreds of people can pass him all day long and won't know he's here!" he grinned.

Something tells me Cyrus won't enjoy whatever Charon has planned for him...

"I was thinking more about a framework of events. What will we do with him?"

"I figure we can let him stew for a while; think about what he's done. Everyone he's wronged. How he's in a building full of people he tried to murder. Not like he'll know exactly where he is at first, but he did try to kill everyone in the universe, so he could be on another planet for all the difference it would make." Charon's voice was so *gleeful* that Saturn felt that odd rot in his stomach again.

I suppose there was that SMALL detail...

But at the same time, he couldn't argue that Cyrus didn't deserve it. He closed the door behind himself, hearing it lock automatically, and when he turned around, Charon was dangling a key in front of him.

"There you go. I figure you'll be wanting to lay into him once he comes to, but try to just go in there when I tell you to. I'll come up with something close to a schedule in the next few days."

So I guess they are just going to keep him trapped and shout at him and beat him indefinitely.

And THIS, kids, is why you don't try to destroy the entire universe. It turns out people don't like you very much after that!

The key was as light as any other but for some reason, Saturn felt a weight to it that went beyond the thin metal. "Yes sir."

Charon's beaming expression shifted to a scowl. "Don't let me catch you taking it easy on him. He wanted you dead. All of us. Everything and everyone you've ever known." Just as quickly, he was smiling again, a deceptively kindly expression that an unknowing observer would describe as grandfatherly. "Ah well. Sleep on it. And when you come back to handle things later, just keep it in mind. Don't let him manipulate you." He yawned, accompanying it with a dramatic stretch. "Ah, I'm sure you can handle it. You've always been forthcoming, haven't you? Well, I'll see you in the morning."

I guess Charon feels like he is doing everyone else a favor. Letting them beat up a guy they hate might raise his popularity. I expect he intends to capitalize on that and use it to become the official new leader.

Even with Charon's departure, the key in Saturn's hand carried the same disquieting presence. It was a few minutes of silence before he let himself leave the hallway, feeling as though both men were watching him the entire time.

But what will Saturn do, I wonder? I'm guessing he will break Cyrus out and this will be a fic about Saturn and Cryus being at odds with the rest of the team led by Charon.

Ah, with the title of the fic being "The Devil You Know" it sounds like Saturn will make a choice between Charon and Cyrus and Saturn will choose Cyrus. That and Saturn likes Cyrus, but not Charon despite how Cyrus tried to destroy the universe.

Reporter: "So, Saturn, I heard you are planning to choose Cyrus."

Saturn: "That's right."

Reporter: "But didn't Cyrus try to destroy the universe?"

Saturn: "That's right."

Reporter: "Then why chose him over Charon? Charon didn't try to destroy the universe."

Saturn: "Maybe not, but at least Cyrus isn't a total jerkwad."

Reporter: "Uh... you REALLY dislike Charon, huh?"

Saturn: "Gee, whatever gave you THAT idea?"

Closing thoughts:
So, the main character appears to be Saturn and I believe this fic will be regarding him choosing Cyrus in some capacity, though I am not sure what all that might entail...

There is certainly room for this plot to go in multiple directions. I'd be curious just what direction that would be.

I noticed this chapter was far shorter than some of your other ones. Good idea! It probably helps ease new readers into it.

I didn't catch any spelling or grammar issues, so great job on that front.

Regarding plot there was only one thing that confused me in the line-by-line, but the rest was easy to read and follow.

Thanks for sharing!

 

[ShiniGojira]

Hello! Erm, sorry for being late with my catnip review, kinda got distracted by stuff and only just recently could get this done! Anyway, hope you have a great day!

Summary of Chp 1:

After the events of Cyrus surrendering, Saturn meets up with Charon to speak to Cyrus if guess? This seems to be a different interpretation of team galactic's end or something.

Review for Chp 1:

Never read the manga, comics or whatever this is supposed to be based on so hopefully that doesn't affect me too much. Anywho, so this fic is supposed to be in the perspective of Galactic's admins after the failed world domination I'm assuming. It's really interesting to see this interpretation of Cyrus and Team Galactic. Most of the time, I've only read fics where Team Galactic were cults or insane so seeing the admins not being crazy cultists is certainly a new thing for me.

I'm guessing the fic is gonna explore Saturn and him coming to terms with Cyrus being a manipulative bastard and trying to reform himself into becoming a better person? The next chapter is probably gonna be Saturn trying to ask Cyrus and see if he cares about them or not I guess.

I genuinely don't know and this fic really does look like it has a ton of potential on where this could go.

Charon was a fun character, surprisingly a somewhat good guy despite being in Team Galactic. I wonder if he'll be the anchor here for Saturn in case Cyrus manages to manipulate him again.

Anyway, here's my line-by-line comments:

In the layout of the former base, this had been supply closet,

Missing a 'the' before this

Charon's voice was so *gleeful* that Saturn felt that odd rot in his stomach again.

So might just be a me thing but I feel like if you wanna emphasize something, it'd be better if it was in italics instead of asterisks since I don't know, it kinda just takes me out of it a bit. I don't think it's anything too serious though since everyone else can probably just ignore it fine.

And that should be it, this chapter was a fun read, hope you have a nice rest of your day or evening! Ciao.

 

[Blackjack Gabbiani]

Ahaha the asterisks are because I write everything in Notepad and there's no italics or hold or anything there

Yeah, this is based on a manga, Pokémon Diamond and Pearl Adventure!, an eight volumes series focusing on a kid named Hareta, who grew up in a forest and was effectively raised by pokémon, and Mitsumi, a lab assistant with a mysterious past (though you've read far enough here to see that her secret was that she's a former Galactic commander).

(Also thanks for pointing out a missing word! But I think the word would be "a")

 

[Tango]

Hey there, Blackjack!

I'm here for catnip to review your Chapter Two!

I'm glad I got your fic again since I like to continue fics that I've already started.

Word Count: 1,120/200

Enjoy!

Spoiler: Line by Line Reaction

Saturn awoke to seventeen text messages. One was, somehow, an advertisement that had gotten past the security levels applied to Galactic field communication. The other sixteen were from Charon, outlining exactly what Saturn's duties were for the day.

Holy cow... Charon just painted the 'I'm a sucky boss, please replace me' target on himself. Yeah I think this fic will be Saturn choosing to side with Cryus. At least he didn't pull the kind of crap Charon is.

He opened the advertisement first, not really reading it but letting his eyes gloss over the paragraph of unimportant words before finally deleting it.

As one does with such things...

Then he got up and got a drink of water, swallowing it in a single go before finally sitting on the foot of his bed and finally checking Charon's messages.

Yep, best to be hydrated before seeing what crap is going on.

They went into great detail of how Saturn was to comport himself, spending a full half of the messages on what he was not to say in Cyrus's presence. The rest of it was broken up into to-dos and how to properly keep the former boss compliant. His pokémon had been taken and were restrained in the lab, which would be a big first step in keeping Cyrus in check.

Ok, so at least Charon isn't being controlling to that level about everything - just about how to interact with Cyrus.

There was a sizable chance, though it wasn't addressed, that Charon had bugged the room, and Saturn wasn't about to take any chances even if his behavior wasn't so instructed.

He wouldn't bother with breakfast or anything else, not with the tension leaving long disruptive trails through him. He put his uniform on and ran a hand through his hair, noting it was likely drooping out of its usual crescent, but not caring for presentation. He would go handle Cyrus and that would be all he would be ordered to do for the rest of the day.

Huh, I wonder how he knew it would be all he would be ordered to do. Is it because he is essentially baby-sitting Cyrus until it's Cyrus's bedtime? (Yes I know he is more like a prison guard than a baby sitter)

So, was Saturn supposed to report to work at a particular time but missed it? Does Saturn get a lunch break? It sounds like a really hungry job. Will he bring some snacks or did grumpy-butt (aka Charon) tell him no snacks?

On his way to the hidden room, Saturn didn't pay much attention to anything around him. The presence of grunts was one thing, the position of security cameras another, but any greetings or other words went unawares.

It doesn't sound like Saturn likes this job very much.

There was nobody in the hallway. The out of the way location was ideal for keeping a captive, even from the rest of the team, and Saturn surmised that the entire reconstruction of the base had been done with the central idea of this very specific prized captive, the honored guest, meant to be said with Charon's particular overdramatic and slightly sticky emphasis.

Three meals a day, don't have to work a job, and free health care! What's not to like?

Key into lock, and the door came open easily. A bit too easily; Saturn wondered how firm the lock really was. Before he turned the light on, he pocketed the key again and shut the door behind him. Finally the lights, and they were oppressively bright. If they were too bright for Saturn, he wondered what it must be like to Cyrus, who had spent the night in complete dark.

I detect a hint of empathy in there, potentially.

Though Cyrus was still slumped in the chair, wincing slightly at the light but seeming to be very much unconscious.

He wasn't supposed to be. Saturn had orders to rouse him if this was still the case. But he could take that moment to look around the room. The only furnishing was the chair, and along one wall was a large screen, entirely shut off without even a light to confirm that it was plugged in. The bigness of the room in comparison made its sole inhabitant seem small.

Definitely gives the interrogation room vibe.

Some strange coldness swept through Saturn. The thought *you are alone with the man who tried to murder you* crept through his mind. *The man who treated you like shit under his heel* followed behind. *The man you devoted your probably literally damned life to* tingled up his spine, and *the man who was going to wipe out the entire universe and all he cared about was fighting that damn kid one more time* and by that point Saturn was utterly sick with it, grateful that he hadn't eaten anything yet.

Calling it now, these negative thoughts are only here because the narrative will be going the opposite direction.

Cyrus cared nothing for him. He was apathetic, uncaring, obsessed with his bizarre ideas of perfection that nobody else managed to meet, entirely unhuman, entirely wrong. And he was also completely helpless before Saturn.

Which is exactly why he will do the opposite of what the narrative is suggesting.

He could do anything he wanted. Anything that came to mind, anything at all, and Cyrus would deserve every last bit of it. He was shivering, the cold gripping around his heart, and the tremor tightened his breath and trembled his fingers. His impulse was to strike Cyrus immediately, force him awake with relentless revenge, but before he could even raise his hand, something even more terrifying occurred to him.

*What would Charon do to you if you did this?*

So he is forbidden to beat Cyrus? I thought that was mostly the whole point? Keep him locked up and beat him daily for what he did?

And Saturn froze in place, an utter sickness seeping through him at the double punch of realizations. All he could do was follow orders, and nothing else. That was his sole role in things, with no way out.

Saturn can't just run away or something?

He winced tightly before bringing his hand down on Cyrus's shoulder. The plain, loose shirt was something far removed from Cyrus's usual uniform, the only thing Saturn had ever seen him in. Indeed, the nondescript nature of these new garments seemed to take on a symbolic nature in Saturn's mind. The would-be god, stripped of his adornments.

Ooo! I like the wording choices here in that last sentence. Very cool!

But he had a job to do. Cautiously, he gave Cyrus's shoulder a little shake. "Sir. Sir, you're to wake up now."

Sir? That seems WAY too polite! Given all the stuff we just read, I'm surprised there isn't name-calling here. Like, "Hey you dumb psychopath, wake up!" or something...

"Ugh..." Cyrus sighed and ever so slightly pulled away from the touch. "Who's there..." Slowly, he opened his eyes, the usually sharp blue now dull and tired in a way that even the most work-addled hours had never done. "Sa--Saturn?"

"It's me, sir." Saturn took a step back and stood with his hands behind his back. "Do you remember where you are?"

I don't understand the extreme politeness. Did Charon order Saturn to be this polite?

"Turn off the lights." Even in Cyrus's subdued state, it carried the tension of an order.

And Saturn wasn't taking orders from him any more. "Answer my question," he said flatly.

Saturn, are you sure you didn't mean to say: "Please sir, will you answer my question? If not, I'll wait patently for you to answer it. And then, good sir, I will turn off the lights for you. But I need you to answer my question first, please."

First he is polite and now he is not polite... I don't get it...

Raising his head, Cyrus took in a fuller view of the commander before him, seeming to pay special attention to Saturn's expression. "...So that's how it is." He held back a yawn before continuing. "This must be the Galactic base, or what passes for it now."

"Do you remember how you got here?"

Cyrus thought for a moment, pushing through the clouds in his mind. "I was...surrounded. Neo Galactic, they called themselves. Yes..." He nodded, seemingly more to himself. "Yes, that sounds about right. That's what happened. They threatened me...that's it, they took my pokémon."

Saturn shifted a bit uncomfortably. Weavile and Gyarados were being contained in the lab, and though that was all he knew, it was more than enough.

But Cyrus didn't continue down that line, instead asking "what was I sedated with?"

"I don't know. I can have that information gathered later."

Don't they KNOW how Cyrus got here? I guess they are just trying to find out how much Cyrus knows? Why though? I can't imagine he can escape given all the lengths they went through to put him here.

"Hnngh..." It was an atypical sound to hear from the man, and Saturn took it as a sign that Cyrus was still utterly out of it. "What does he...what does Charon want?"

Saturn wasn't certain if Cyrus's captors had mentioned Charon at all or if he had just been able to figure it out through what he knew of his followers. He also wasn't sure if he had the clearance to confirm the statement. "Everything will be revealed in time."

I like how you walk through the reasoning of what is being said. That's good.

Cyrus's gaze hitched on him for just a moment before falling once more. "You don't know either."

"Everything will be revealed in time." Saturn let the words hang in the air before trying to change the subject. "Now then, the plan is that I come in twice a day and keep you fed and hydrated. You are to be confined to this room and tied to the chair until such time as I receive orders to the contrary. That said I will attempt to keep you as comfortable as the situation can afford." He was amazed at how rehearsed and scripted his words came across, considering he hadn't put any prior thought into them.

We even provide pillows, a fluffy bed, free wifi, and an in-door swimming pool! At galactic resort your comfort is our number 1 concern! Please ring the concierge if there is anything else in this situation we can do to improve your stay~!

If I were Cyrus, I'd reply with "Ok cool."

Guy tried to end the universe, so all things considered, this is a pretty good gig even though its likely to be dreadfully boring...

"No one can hear you outside this room, as the walls have been soundproofed. That said, even if they could..." He found that his hands had tightened behind his back. "...you would find it nearly impossible to find anybody who would still obey you."

Cyrus nodded slowly. "I understand."

"Somehow I doubt that." As much as Saturn wanted to hear what Cyrus could possibly have to say, he had the creeping suspicion that he could develop *sympathy* for the man who had tried to kill him and everyone else.

Ah he is already going the sympathy route I see. This is a good second step in that direction. Just because it seems narratively obvious to me doesn't make it bad. Actually, think you are doing a good job with it.

Cyrus had manipulated all of them for years and there was no way, Saturn figured, that he was about to leave all that behind, especially not when that silver tongue would be most needed. "But you've been told enough." He retrieved a bottle of water from his deep uniform pockets. "I'll give this to you slowly. Instructing me how to best drink it will be the only orders I'll accept from you."

Another nod, and the captive would-be god seemed to almost smile. Surely he was planning something, but with the bottle to his lips, he kept it to himself, and Saturn was grateful for it.

The last couple sentences seems a bit odd to me. If he was planning something and wanted to tell Saturn about it, he could just do so after the bottle was put down. It would take at least a second for Saturn to walk out to leave the room, so Cyrus would have a chance to get a word in at at that point.

And why would Saturn be grateful for it? (Though this may be because I'm just not familiar with Saturn's character yet)

After leaving Cyrus's cell, for there was no other word for it, Saturn headed back to his quarters, intent on sleeping again. Along the way he texted Charon a rough outline of what had happened. The advertisement he had received earlier was gone as if it had never happened, so he felt at least a little better about the security of the line.

I wonder if there will be a bigger plot thread involved with the advertisement? I guess if there isn't it added a slice of realism to things.

He was midway through a protein bar that he figured was the only thing he could stomach when his phone buzzed.

I'm not sure why Saturn is having such a hard time keeping food down right now. Is it because he is angry that he didn't get to beat the tar out of Cyrus? Is it because he felt disgusted at having to care for Cyrus? If he was disgusted, then why be so polite to him? Since he dropped the politeness later, did that mean he disobeyed orders from Charon to do that or was he never ordered to be polite to begin with?

"*Tell me exactly what he said.*"

"Well, this was a mistake," Saturn muttered with some disgust as he tossed the protein bar to his desk and texted back "*I don't remember exactly. He tried to order me to turn the lights off and I told him I wasn't going to obey.*"

So Saturn hates Charon enough to not be able to eat when dealing with him?

Hitting send was difficult, but still came easier than he had expected, and so did checking the inevitable answer. "*You did good. Don't fall for anything he says to you. He'll only lie, like always.*"

"*I know. He was already acting regretful but I wouldn't believe it.*"

"*Good, good. Don't take any guff from him either.*"

"Guff?" Saturn repeated aloud, almost as a snort. Charon was the oldest Galactic member by a wide margin and it came out in the strangest ways sometime. "*I won't.*"

"*I trust you. Don't forget to handle him in the evening as well. Other than that you have the rest of the day off. C out.*"

Sounds like a pretty good work gig to me. Just look at all the free time Saturn should get! No classes, no homework and only a part time job to do!

Saturn realized he had forgotten to ask if he had clearance to reveal who was behind all this, but he also didn't especially care. He was just relieved for the conversation to be over.

"What time is it?"

Saturn was preparing a spoonful of the strange packaged goo that passed as a nutritional staple in the team. All remainders of it should have been destroyed in the explosion that claimed the previous base, but some crates of it had been found in the warehouse, and as loathe as the grunts were to eat it, Charon considered it good enough for Cyrus. "About seven pm."

Dang that sounds rather nasty to eat. Still, it beats getting actively tortured like one might expect from a betrayed evil team.

"Mm. So it was seven am when you woke me."

The deduction was correct, but Saturn wasn't going to verify. "Open up."

Cyrus accepted the pungent delivery with no resistance.

This bit is pretty funny. I'm now imagining him opening up to eat like this:

It was rumored that he was the only person in the entire team that would willingly consume it anyway. Attempts to popularize it among the grunts yielded only dares and a discolored break room sink as everyone had cast it down the drain. And even then, a further rumor said that Cyrus would be seen to wince every time.

Cryus has something in common with Doduo from my fic: he apparently craves nasty food!

Saturn wasn't usually one for rumors, but he was a bit surprised that Cyrus was taking everything so calmly. The last he had seen of the man had been a staggering series of events playing out in a deceptively short period of time.

Well, it would have been much shorter indeed if Cyrus had gotten started earlier instead of waiting around to see if Hareta would show up to try and stop him. It was ultimately for the best that he had, given that if Hareta hadn't been there, there was a pretty sizable chance that the entire universe would have been destroyed in Dialga and Palkia's rampage, but at the time, it didn't make any sense. Sentimentality was useless, Cyrus had always preached, and yet he stayed his actions in order to have a final battle with a boy he planned on unmaking anyway.

Ah, I feel like this bit is a jab at the original plot in the manga. Good to see your fic charges in and grabs the bull by the horns, calling it as it sees it.

None of it made any sense, to Saturn or the other commanders, but they could only wait at a distance and watch their leader stand at the dais and mutter to himself about lost possibility.

So when Cyrus asked "Where are the other commanders?", Saturn slightly jumped. Their former leader was many things, but he was not clairvoyant.

"I'm to deal with you," was all he could really say.

"I know Charon is here. I know that he's the one who ordered my capture."

Saturn rarely thought of Charon as a commander. He wasn't involved in field missions and had been the last of them promoted, shortly before Mitsumi had quit. He even though of her as a commander before he thought of Charon, and she had abandoned the entire team. None were elevated to replace her, but they were nearing the last phases of their plan anyway. "I'm to deal--"

"I know that. That is not what I asked."

Sick burn there Cyrus.

Saturn set the empty package aside. "That's the only answer I can give."

"What is he planning?" Cyrus's sharp blue eyes had regained their usual intensity, and Saturn found he had to avoid their direct gaze.

"I don't have to answer to you any more."

Ah you don't have to, but you want to underneath it all. You just don't know it yet, Saturn.

"Commander." How Cyrus managed to be as imposing as he was when tied to a chair was perhaps some special ability of his. Perhaps humans possessed that trait as well. "You will tell me. Perhaps not today, but you will."

Exerting his dominance here, I see.

It was a feeling of being both on fire and frozen all at once, as if the intensity of Cyrus's presence was eroding Saturn's very nature. But he had to remain steadfast. *Think of what he did to you. Think of Lake Valor, when he fired you for losing a battle, even though you had just captured Azelf. Think of Spear Pillar, how he cast you aside and would have wiped out everything...*

Now I'm starting to get the vibe that Saturn is romantically attracted to Cyrus. Why else would he constantly need to remind himself of how awful Cyrus is?

"Cyrus, once you try to kill someone, you lose any right to boss them around. And you tried to kill the entire universe. Nobody will obey you ever again. You gave that up with your...mad god shit."

Yes? And? Cyrus is just going to carry on like everything you just said was meaningless.

He stood as upright as he could and tried as hard as he could to face the crushing aura of that glare, not looking at Cyrus directly but as close as he could manage. "Thinking that everyone was as miserable as you were, and that meant it all had to die, just because you couldn't deal with your own emotions. Either you'd be a god, or the universe would end, and you'd never have to deal with anything. But instead, you're here. Everything you did has consequences, and that's exactly what I'm here to deliver."

Yeah, by politely feeding you and providing you with food all while never harming a hair on your head and occasionally answering questions. Great consequences, Saturn. *claps*

Cyrus stared back, blunt and straightforward, scowling intently with his piercing gaze leveled firmly at Saturn, before letting his eyes slowly close and his head droop with a languid exhale. "...You're right."

For a moment, Saturn was loathe to believe he could possibly have heard it correctly. "No," he dismissed. "No, you don't understand a thing. Don't you sit here and act like you can tell me anything you want. I'm not the naive kid who believed everything you ever said. You can't--"

"Saturn!" The address was short, sharp, commanding. "Listen to me."

Saturn jumped at the bark of his name. "C-Cyrus!" It was meant as a response, and he was mostly grateful that he hadn't called the man "boss" or "master" like usual.

Yeah, Saturn is definitely going to fall back into old habits here. Saturn is such a Tsundere.

Cyrus sighed heavily. "Saturn, listen to me." The repeated words were softer this time, with a greater weight to them. "I know I've made mistakes. Horrific ones. Ones I can never atone for." He looked back up at Saturn, head still tilted down. "I've fallen from grace, so far from what I desired to be. And I realized, there on the Spear Pillar, with the universe falling apart around me, that I can never truly become the god I wanted. Even if I did truly ascend, even if I managed, somehow, to create a new universe..." He trailed off and drew in a long breath. Though his gaze kept on Saturn, it avoided his eyes. "Even if I did all that, I could still never be a perfect being. I still possess emotion, and thus am inherently flawed. Emotions only..." His eyes darted away for a moment, entirely away from Saturn. "...cause pain. I said as much on the summit, but I failed to realize how flawed that truly made me. A god riddled with emotion cannot create a world free from strife. And I..."

Ah interesting. I guess this is a jab at how the manga portrayed Cyrus's plans. Calls them out as nonsensical. Cool!

Saturn gritted his teeth, glaring down at Cyrus as he was. All of this was a ploy; it had to be.

Yep, and you are going to eat every bit of it up.

Cyrus never regretted anything, or he never expressed regret at least. Saturn had to fight it, against the fluttering of his heart, against the bile churning up from his stomach, against every impulse he had to mindlessly believe everything his leader told him.

Ah, more evidence of romantic attraction. (potentially anyway)

"...I understand if you don't forgive me."

The words cut through the air like a sacrificial blade. Without another word, Saturn turned off the lights and left the room, wishing the sound of the lock was louder.

Yeah, Cyrus definitely won that round. But who is Saturn fooling? Cyrus will have him eating from his hand very soon.

Closing thoughts:
Alright so this chapter pretty much confirms Saturn will be shifting back to Cyrus's side. There were some confusing aspects about some of the chapter, but most of it was easy enough to pick up. I'm definitely wondering at this point where the fic will go with things.