• Welcome to Thousand Roads! You're welcome to view discussions or read our stories without registering, but you'll need an account to join in our events, interact with other members, or post one of your own fics. Why not become a member of our community? We'd love to have you!

    Join now!

  • Our "Weird and Wonderful" one-shot contest is now underway! Pokémon are strange and magical creatures, and for our writing contest this year, we want to see you higlight some of their oddest abilities and features! From stories about luxray thieves using X-ray vision to scope out targets to those about trainers bewitching opponents with their stantlers' mystic antlers, any sort of fic featuring a pokémon's unusual lore is welcome! See full details here.

Pokémon Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Tales Of Arrival (PMD X Tales Of Symphonia)

Z102eternal

Bug Catcher
Location
United States of America
Pronouns
He/Him
Allllllllllllright! Review time!
First of all, as a tales of fan, more crossovers are appreciated! I have played ToS, though its been ages so my memory is fuzzy. Using Kratos as the transformed pokemon is a very interesting choice, and one I can't say anyone else would go for, so already intrigued by that alone!

He sat up. And then realized he wasn't himself. His body was now much, much smaller in proportion to his head, and fuzzy. And his arms were... wings. Not like his old angel wings, like bat or dragon wings, with claws at the end instead of hands.


"How... How did this happen?"


"Someone must have knocked you out!" said the fox.


Kratos gave the fox a look.


"It must have been a feral Pokemon... Do you remember anything about it?"


"No... and I mean... What am I?"


The fox gasped. "Oh no! You must have amnesia! Uh, you're a Noibat! Though, not like any Noibat I've ever seen. Your colors are all different..."


"So I'm a creature known as a Noibat, then."
I'm sorry but I almost died laughing when I saw the banner art. The thought of Kratos of all characters reduced to a cute, chibi creature is a crazy ass sight (really banger art though fr fr, I also love the art listed at the end of the chapter.)

"Kratos? Huh. Sounds foreign. Well nice to meet you Kratos! I'll be sure to help get your memories back!"


"I don't need-"


"Come on! I'll take you to a doctor in the city."


"...Fine."

Nope sorry Kratos, you've been strapped to the PMD partner dynamic train of destiny, with no stops! Also, they have a doctor for amnesiacs? Imagine how much the plot of the average pmd fic would change with one of those.
"Besides," said Stoakes. "You came to Rainbow Wing City at a good time! The Seeking is soon! There will be a big festival and everything!"


"The Seeking?"
Annnnnd our first taste of lore, some sort of fancy festival. I'm a sucker for those, so hmmmm.
Finally they came to a mess hall, attached to a kitchen and a bar. In the kitchen a strange apple-pie-dragon was busy cooking despite his squat body while a spiny purple rhino-rabbit handed drinks to thirsty Pokemon.


"And this is where everyone eats and drinks! Oh, you probably need breakfast, don't you?"


"I-"


Kratos' stomach rumbled. It seemed this new body needed food more than his angel one.
Funny chef duo, me likely. Also get used to it Kratos, the average pokemon can eat their weight in gold.
Why are you two by yourselves?"


Riki rolled his eyes. "We haven't formed a proper Adventurer Squad yet. They think they're better than us."


Edbark looked to a small blue canine sitting across from them a fair distance away.


"Uh, hey, Stella? You can still totally join us!"


Stella gave them a look before scooching further away.
Sure does suck being the loser unpopular kids at the table.
"The Seeking is the most wonderful thing! Everyone gets together for a big festival! The queen of Spectroma - that's the nation Rainbow Wing City is the capital of - shows up! Ho-Oh himself shows up! And then shooting stars called Reality Shards fall out of the sky and Adventurer Squads have to gather them all for a big ritual to stave off the darkness!"


Kratos barely stopped himself from frowning. Something about this seemed familiar in a way he didn't like.


"I see. Fascinating."
After meeting the guild leader, its time for more lore! Clarification on the festival, and hmm already got legendary integration.
In a dark throne room, a Decidueye sat, looking around from her throne. Mainly because she was bored, waiting for something.


Finally something did come, in the form of a Steenie, in a uniform, looking very nervous. The Decidueye leered down at her.


"Are the preparations ready?"


"Y-yes Empress Nyra, they're all ready for tomorrow."


"Good. The Seeking is tomorrow. We must make sure it all goes exactly as planned."


The Steenie shifted awkwardly. Nyra rolled her eyes.

"Yes?"


"Since I helped get this done, Empress... Would you put in a word for me to advance in the ran-"


Thunk.


The Steenie froze in place as a shadowy arrow stopped just shy of hitting them.


"No. Your boldness entertained me so I let you off light. You'd best get out of here before I decide on more painful ways of using you for entertainment."


The Steenie yelped and exited the throne room as quickly as she could. The door closed behind her with a bang.


Nyra slouched and gave a bird smirk.
Wow, what a bitch. Looks like we got our first major villain. Will take a small detour and say that this section has a weiiiirddd placement. Was it really necessary to have this here? Think it breaks focus too much to plop it right in the middle of our protag's pov before switching right back.
Kratos sighed. Then he told them everything. The last four thousand years or so, Mithos, Yggdrasil, Yuan, Anna, Lloyd, Lloyd's friends, the quest they all went through... the only thing he left out (since he did not feel the probing Psychic presence of Ferrite and Pearlite) was any mention that none of those involved were Pokemon. By the end of his very long tale the jaws of all the other Pokemon had dropped in shock.


"Incredible... You're a Legendary from another world and you were sent here..." said Cerwiden. "But why?"


Legendary? Kratos certainly wouldn't describe himself as such. "Your guess is as good as mine. The voice didn't tell me."
......Huh, now that I think about it, that's not even wrong. Though, its not like lloyd or the other non-angels were running around with master balls or whatever.

Anyway! That's two chapters down! As far as this story goes, its very quick and to the point. Not necessary a bad thing, although I do have some gripes about it. For one, it feels like things come and go a bit too quick for me to process them. I get wanting to go from point A to point B, but it wouldn't hurt to go a bit slower and flesh out some scenes. On that note, the descriptions are pretty lacking most of the time. Like, they get the job done, but kinda barely for me. That combined with the fast pacing is kinda tuning me out a bit imo. But nevertheless, this story definitely is charming, and has enough of an interesting premise to have me return at some point. Hope to see you keep chugging along!

Until next time, Chao!
 

133TFR33k

Creator of the Doduo Alliance
Partners
  1. doduo
Review:
Prologue: New Life & Chapter 1: Welcome To The World


This fic is rated Teen for blood, mild gore, adults doing adult things like drinking and swearing, and some dirty jokes and such.
Aww thanks for the warnings! Noted and accepted! :quag:

About time I had another B fic huh? (Greenhorn Prometheus doesn't count, it was a three-parter that was written out ahead of time, shhhhhhhh)
Sounds mysterious! For now though, my focus is in this fic!

So, this is a fic that took me some come convincing to write, (I was never really that fond of the actual PMD games, though I generally like the fics better) but in the end I got attached to an idea and was like "hell, let's go."
Sounds like a good reason to me to start a fic! 🙃

I will be up front in saying this is a Tales Of Symphonia/Pokemon Mystery Dungeon crossover, and that you should note three things about that:


1.There will be some massive fucking spoilers for Tales Of Symphonia, especially around the character Kratos Aurion, so if you're particularly concerned about that then I recommend playing the game or watching an LP before reading this fic.


A. That said... If you have not played Tales Of Symphonia, do not care about spoilers relating to it, and are just here because you saw "Pokemon Mystery Dungeon" in the title, you should be fine - this fic is like at least 70% PMD, albeit a celebration of what I like about the genre and a satire of what I don't.
Always good to throw out there. Also, if that means probably at least 25% is Symphonia which works great for me as I am even more familiar with that than I am PMD! Sounds like this will be a fun read.

%. This is set in a PMD version of the Yangverse. It's fundamentally the same world, just with no humans and a lot of PMD elements added to compensate.
Not really sure what all this means having only played the first PMD myself, but I'm sure this helps probably most readers. Noted about no humans, unless you count Kratos.

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Tales Of Arrival


apTTWk22S5e508vygqFpxcAAjBjwEJg4D-YHjbPk0YWp0MBbLl6UicB1i1YV3BkMAPKNGGGF_fdTDKvsc2r8oZWVWjIQ5LoYhwj07mO6NcHaQxVmwdaXAYKxnQRh3LPuQQb-tXJ8
You actually have fan art! I'm envious. I would love some for my fic... Very cool that you have art for it!

View attachment 12876

(Banner by Shinywolf! Cover by me)
Wow you made your own art for it! I'm not much of an artist myself or I would have made some for my own fic... The fact that you made art for it suggests to me that you really like this fic a lot! That's a great thing to see with me being about to read it! :quag:

Prologue: New Life
New life.. I hope it means PMD isn't where Kratos goes because he died or something... that would be a sadder note to start on him than him flying off into space stranded on a giant planet by himself. Hmm.. on second thought, it probably doesn't matter too much...

Kratos could see the vast darkness of space staring out before him.


Derris-Kharlan had been drifting for a long while. It'd be a while before it'd establish itself as a proper living planet. His communications with Yuan had ceased just the other day. He had already scattered Cruxis' Exspheres into space. He could barely see where he left in the sky anymore.
Just so you know, if this ends up being good, this will be my new head-cannon for Kratos after the game.

Normally he'd pretend it didn't hurt. But leaving everything behind-


No. He had to.
Stoic Kratos. Off to a good start how you portray him.

He looked in the direction in the sky Derris-Kharlan had drifted from. Lloyd. He was back there. Kratos wondered, hoped, that he and his gaggle of friends were doing alright.


He looked to where Derris-Kharlan was drifting in the cold void of space. This was the only place for him. He realized now the blood on his hands. The countless people Cruxis had killed he was complicit with.


He didn't deserve to stay home. He didn't deserve redemption. He didn't deserve a happy life with his son, the only family he had left.
Well Kratos, I think things will be getting better than you think they will be. Hang in there!

As he thought this, however, he noticed a strange light in the dark, starry sky. Looking at it, he thought at first it was a comet or meteor shooting through the sky.


But then he realized it was heading through Derris-Kharlan's atmosphere at incredible speed.


Heading straight toward him.


He tried to get out of the way. But it was too late. The light consumed him.
Oh, um... maybe he did die then?? :eyes:

-----------------


Kratos woke up in a colorful, pulsating, void. He couldn't feel his body. Almost like he was part of the void.


Then he heard a voice.


"Hello? Hello? Kratos, you there?"


"How do you know my name?" said Kratos.


"Oh, goody, it is you!" said the voice. "Listen, I know this is kind of sudden, but something's coming to my world and I need your help with it."


"...Why me?"


"You're... uniquely qualified. For multiple reasons. But before I bring you over I need to ask you some questions."
First, I love the line at the top. Using things like that to show the scene changed is super helpful!

Regarding the rest:
Oooo something interesting is happening!

Kratos, you might as well go. It beats starting stoically into outer space for the next hundred years or however long it would be for your life to get interesting again!

"I-"


"First question! Do you like groan-inducing puns?"
Suddenly I am reminded of Monty Python lol.... :quag:

"...Spare me."


"You're lucky I can't think of one. Second question! Do you get bothered by noise and ruckus around you?"


"I try not to let it get to me."
Somehow I get the feeling Kratos would be slightly less patient here like if there were 2 more dots at the end of that line. I imagine he is probably wondering why something so other worldly happened just so it could ask just basic seemingly pointless questions to him. This is really small but I feel like it might let it do what you want it to do to a bigger extent and would be super easy to implement. Feel free to ignore me here though if it doesn't make sense for what you are going for.

"Hmmmm... Third question! Your friend is crying right in front of you! What made that happen?"


Kratos thought back to Mithos. To Yuan. To Lloyd.

"...It's probably my fault."


"Ouch. Not much of the self-esteem type. Question four! Do you occasionally consider yourself to be dull and overly cautious?"
Ouch indeed! :copyka:

"Of course not."


"Sure you aren't. Anyway, final question! Have you ever wanted to communicate with aliens from another planet?"
What is this voice?! Its like it already knows the real answers before Kratos even tries to answer them! :mewlulz:

"I'm assuming you're one?"


"I will neither confirm nor deny."
Lack of dialogue tags really isn't harming my ability to know who is talking! Granted there are only 2 people speaking, but I wanted to make sure I pointed that out to you since lack of confusion for your readers should be a positive thing! :veelove:

"Hmmm... Some beings from my world came from the stars, but other than you, Derris-Kharlan hasn't encountered any aliens yet... so yes, I suppose."


"Okay! Hmmm, let's see, yes, yes... I think I have a form cooked up for you!"


"...Form?"
Uh oh! I think this means Kratos is about to be Pokefied! So much for demon fang spamming all the enemy mons...

"Anyway, remember that question about the aliens and how you said you'd like to meet them?"


"Yes? I'm guessing wish granted."


"Yep! Wish granted."


The void turned a blinding white before Kratos lost consciousness again.
I'm really curious how Kratos will take this... :mewlulz:

Chapter 1: Welcome To The World
Chapter title makes me think the arrival here will be welcoming. We shall see how it measures up! :eyes:

Kratos stirred, groaned, and finally opened his eyes. What he saw was blue sky, much more blue than on Derris-Kharlan. He tilted his head a bit, saw trees, grass, and -
Your not in Kansa- I mean Derris Kharlan anymore!

"Hey you! You're finally awake!"
But the big question: how long was he out for??

What Kratos saw next to him was a small, black-and-red fox wearing a teal robe, with inquisitive blue eyes staring right at him.
Well at least what he is waking up to is cute. Given all the things he has seen in his life, this is definitely on the good end of the spectrum!

"I was just about to get help... Are you OK?"


"Yes... I am alright," said Kratos. "Let me just..."


He sat up. And then realized he wasn't himself. His body was now much, much smaller in proportion to his head, and fuzzy. And his arms were... wings. Not like his old angel wings, like bat or dragon wings, with claws at the end instead of hands.
All things considered, I think this makes for a pretty reasonable mon for him to turn into. Both in looks and abilities! It even has fangs!

Kratos! Make sure you yell demon fang every time you use bite!! :mewlulz:

"How... How did this happen?"


"Someone must have knocked you out!" said the fox.


Kratos gave the fox a look.
Sorry Kratos, this is PMD. No one knows what the heck you are talking about. 😅

"It must have been a feral Pokemon... Do you remember anything about it?"


"No... and I mean... What am I?"


The fox gasped. "Oh no! You must have amnesia! Uh, you're a Noibat! Though, not like any Noibat I've ever seen. Your colors are all different..."


"So I'm a creature known as a Noibat, then."
Yessss with fangs! Pokemon fangs! Pocket Monster Fangs! Monster fangs.... DEMON FANGS! :wowzard:

"Yeah! And I'm a Zorua! My name's Edbark. Do you remember yours?"


"...Yes. It's Kratos."


"Kratos? Huh. Sounds foreign. Well nice to meet you Kratos! I'll be sure to help get your memories back!"
Foreign? *snorts* how about an alien from another dimension transformed into a Noibat? Truth be stranger than fiction... or truth inside of fiction and outside of fiction is more true than fiction inside of fiction...? :copyka:

"I don't need-"


"Come on! I'll take you to a doctor in the city."


"...Fine."
Confirmed city exists and that they have doctors!

Aww Edbark is nice. He is both little and nice so I will call him lil Eddie. Yep Kratos! Just let lil Eddie do the nice thing! :quag:

Edbark started to trot off. Kratos sighed and started to try and follow, only to stumble over. Edbark turned back and gasped.

"Oh no! You've forgotten how to walk!"


"I'm fine," said Kratos. "I just need to get used to this new body..."


"Come on," said Edbark. "I'll help you."


Edbark propped Kratos up with his back, then they walked away together.
Aww lil Eddie!! :veelove:

------------
So, for this line, I noticed the number of dashes is less than the dash line from the previous chapter. This is obviously unacceptable... 🙃

That is.. unless its to signify that LESS time passed here than did last time! Hmmm! (Legitimately wondering about it now.. lol)

Eventually, the duo reached the outskirts of what seemed to be a city. There were many houses both small and large and dirt roads, as well as towering buildings which Kratos could only fathom a guess at the purpose of.
Very interesting! Helps provide some world building!

Having figured out how to walk by himself, Kratos went closer and saw the city was populated not by humans or elves or half-elves or dwarves or even angels, but by a staggering array of different animals, plants, and even inanimate objects, all moving around as if they were people.
As if they were people? Comeon Kratos, after you JUST finished dealing with systemic racism of humans and half-elves you consider Pokemon as if they were not exspheres even though exspheres were considered pretty much people??

To be fair to Kratos though, Pokemon are much more like the monsters from Sylverant than like people. At least in appearance. For all he knows, lil Eddie might be the only one that can speak. I'm sure he will be changing his opinion soon.

"What... is this place?" said Kratos. "And what are these creatures?"


"This is Rainbow Wing City!" said Edbark. "And man, that amnesia really got to you... These are Pokemon! You're a Pokemon, I'm a Pokemon..."


"I thought you said I was a Noibat and you were a Zorua."


"Noibat and Zorua are both kinds of Pokemon silly!"


"...I see."
Its great to see Kratos confused here as this would absolutely be confusing to him! :quag:

The two continued further on into Rainbow Wing City, passing various buildings and a great variety of Pokemon. Kratos marveled at the bazaars and shops and facilities run by colorful creatures he couldn't even count. Eventually the two reached what seemed to be a castle - Kratos noticed one of two in the city, along with a cathedral.
Castles and cathedrals puts them at least around Tethealla in terms of scientific advancement. Meaningful milestones for Kratos's understanding of their culture.

"And this place is..." said Kratos.


"The Adventurer's Guild!" said Edbark."They can help you out!"


Edbark dragged Kratos inside. Kratos noticed more facilities and corridors and dormitories inside, as well as what seemed to be an... Inn? With a bar?
Seemingly small details, but so early on in the story, even things like this are good to provide context! :quag:

Eventually Edbark dragged Kratos into a central room. Seated at the end of the room was a strange, cream-and-green mustelid-like creature wearing a red vest, flanked by two floating grayish blue automaton-like beings.
Ooo looks important! :eyes:

"Guildmaster, it's Edbark!" said one.


"And... some Noibat?" said another.


"I see, I see," said the mustelid. He approached the duo. "Edbark my boy! Who do you have here?"


"Guildmaster Stoakes!" said Edbark. "This is Kratos! Poor guy has amnesia! All he can remember is his own name... You gotta help him!"
Aww lil Eddie! :veelove:

Kratos was about to object that no, he did not have amnesia, he remembers the last four thousand years or so up until this point fine, but then he realized they probably weren't going to listen and decided to just roll with it.
Certainly an easier pill for them to swallow. Definitely seems like something Kratos would be willing to do given the circumstances!

"Hmm, amnesia, huh?" said Stoakes, scratching his chin. "He'll need some rest and recovery... But the Adventurer's Guild never turns down a person in need. He can stay here, we'll have Nurse Betania take a look at him."


"Yay! Thank you, Guildmaster Stoakes!" said Edbark. He turned to Kratos. "These guys have got you covered. I'll be back!"


He scampered off, and the two automatons escorted Kratos to another room as Stoakes followed.
Ok this is a warm and adorable welcome. :veelove: Chapter name is fitting!

---------------
I see this line, but if you want my comment for this one in particular you will need to ask nicely. :grin:

(not planning any more insane comments about lines lol....)

A large pink oval with white tufts on her body and an egg nestled in a pouch on her belly now looked Kratos over. She looked him up, down, and sideways as she prodded and investigated his head and body. Kratos begrudgingly obliged as Stoakes watched.
Ah a Chansey! That is, unless it was supposed to be a Blissey... Oh well, easier to let the narration tell me later which one it is.

Yep Kratos understands being examined is going to be an easier thing than trying to explain he is an alien from another dimension transformed into a Pokemon. Good call Kratos! :quag:
"Well," said the pink oval, who was apparently Nurse Betania, "This is odd. He doesn't seem to have head trauma or other trauma or any injuries at all! How the hell does he have amnesia?"
I love hearing his expressions about Pokemon. Its like what 65 year olds think about Pokemon lol...

"Well I wouldn't know." said Kratos.
LOL legit hilarious since that's what amnesia is! 🤣

Imagining Kratos saying it with his straight face makes it 10 times better!

Not going to lie this made me laugh for a solid 2 minutes lol...

Stoakes thought to himself a bit. "There's one possibility... Some nefarious Pokemon, somehow, wiped his memories."


"Well that gives us fuck-all evidence as to who!" said Betania, huffing.
No Pokemon in a main line game would be using this language and I get the feeling its going to make for some pretty funny scenes... :mewlulz:

"It seems it can't be helped." said Stoakes. He sighed, then turned to Kratos. "My offer for you to stay here still stands. Though... what do you remember?"


Kratos paused to think of a convincing reply. "...My name, Kratos Aurion. And apparently your language, basic functions of living, certain basic concepts... I remember nothing of this world or its people."
Loving your characterization of Kratos so far!

I do keep imagining him as his human self instead of as a Noibat at least for now. Hard habit to break with his transformation being such a new concept in my mind for him.

"Hm. Awfully specific memory wipe," said Stoakes. "Whoever did this to you must have had a very strange goal in mind... Nevertheless, you're safe with the Adventurer's Guild."
Aww its nice that they don't suspect him of lying. Good group of Pokemon in this city! Still, with it being an adventurers guild, I think this means Kratos will need to do something to earn his keep. I wonder what that something will end up being? Hmmm! :unquag:

"Thank you."


"Hmph. Adopting another one, I see, Stoakes," said Betania.
Aww they do this kind of thing for other Pokemon often. Good to portray.

"It can't be helped! Rule Number 1 of the Adventurer's Guild! Always help those in need, no matter who they are!"


Kratos was suddenly reminded of his son Lloyd's fondness for the Dwarven Vows. "I appreciate it."
Wonderful call out to the Dwarven Vows! :quag:

"Besides," said Stoakes. "You came to Rainbow Wing City at a good time! The Seeking is soon! There will be a big festival and everything!"


"The Seeking?"


"I'll let Edbark explain that one, he gets excited about old myths and legends and stuff like that. Anyway, we should probably find you a room..."
Ah, I think we just found the plot! Myths and legends are the stuff plot is made of! 😁

He led Kratos out of the infirmary and down the stony hall to a set of rooms.


"Here's an empty dormitory. Since we're hosting you, you get to stay free of charge here instead of at the inn."
Not even going to make him do anything for it? So nice! :veelove:

"Thank you for your generosity."
Simple dialogue for him but very on-point!

"No problem, Kratos! Come to us for anything you need!"


He headed off. Kratos paused, then sat on the bed of his new room and stared off into space.


What the hell was going on?
As he sits in another world, now as a Noibat. What indeed Kratos, what indeed...

--------------
:eyes:

And there you have it, the beginning of this crossover adventure! Before I go, some art:


Edbark by ToonIRL
Aww lil Eddie looks cute and reliable! Great piece of art for him and nice to see what he looks like in a picture! Thanks for sharing!
View: https://toonirl.tumblr.com/post/188433568521/commission-for-umbramatic-commission-info

Wow cool! Also great to have a picture as I wasn't picking up that he was a Typlosion.

This will update in rough alternation with Heroes After All until one of them finishes in like 3000 years. Stay tuned!
Very well, challenge accepted in the hopes that my reviews will help inspire you to finish the story! (If they are capable of that anyway...)

You poor thing! Almost none of the reviews are from actual fans of TOS! That's horrible! :sadwott:

I hope my review helps make up for that void almost as dark as the space Kratos was riding out into after the defeat of Mythos! :veelove:

Speaking of Kratos, I like him alot for a protag and I also like your portrayal of him alot too! So far, I can see how you would be motivated to write this! :quag:

Honestly I didn't have to hold back on my concrit because there really wasn't much of anything that bugged me about it! :copyka:

Does a great job of keeping the character cast relatively small to begin with to help you warm up to the characters, provides some great context for the world too and hints just enough at the upcoming plot to keep readers invested.

Really looking forward to reviewing more!:veelove:
 
Last edited:

133TFR33k

Creator of the Doduo Alliance
Partners
  1. doduo
Review:
Chapter 2: Seeking Feeling


Hi Umbra! I'm here for another review in response to your review for my Intro & Prologue!



I can't blame Kratos for hoping it was a dream, but all he had going for him was Derris Kharlan anyway so I'm not sure its really all that bad. Given his situation, I'd take it as a plus. This is Kratos we are talking about though and it does feel in character for him.

Nice detail about food in his new body!

Kratos's descriptions for the other Pokemon are great and hiliarious! Just keep in mind that if Kratos calls something an apple pie dragon, I'm going to accept it as fact until told otherwise lol...

Spiced oatmeal porridge? I want some! Feels like a warm welcoming kind of dish to have in an unfamiliar land...

Amnesia! Sell it Kratos!

Dang lil Eddie you got a mouth!

The seeking sounds vauguely like the regeneration of the world.

Mystery dungeon sounds like an out of control world tree.



Ooo ominous throne room scene!

Kind of cool that I could already tell (correctly assumed I think) that this cut to a villian with evil plans just with it saying "In a dark throne room,"



Thats impressive if Ho-Oh can beat original-body Kratos.

Nice to see callbacks to Symphonia from Kratos's thoughts.

They are looking at Kratos too much. I wonder if they suspect him of messing up the seeking.



...aaaand now there is a meeting with them. This is either going to be bad for Kratos or it will (more likely) get him roped into doing questy stuff!

Ah interrogation with lie detectors! Good thing Kratos is no longer an enforcer for a false god that uses racism to end racism!

Oh wow so they get told just about everything! Alright then!

Aww nice touch how Kratos decides what team to be on!



And just like that he goes from amnesia newbie who must be helped to the head honcho who will guide them! Can Kratos really handle his mon body that well though? We haven't seen him try to battle with it yet. I wonder...

Team Symphonia huh. I dont know if Symphonia ever mentioned its own name in game, so Kratos inventing it here is just as good an idea as any!

Good ol Kratos, always looking to be prepaired.



This chapter did good at getting things in motion. Setting up an opposing force and establishing Kratos's team as well as some more world-building. I feel like next chapter where be where things start to shake up. Should be interesting if we see Kratos battle in his Noibat form.

Looking forward to the next chapter!
 

K_S

Unrepentent Giovanni and Rocket fan
Tales of arrival review part 1

Prologue new life...

Blitz status 2/5
Kratos could see the vast darkness of space staring out before him.

Wonder how that star counting is panning out for Aurion... and also how that ex-sphere drop is going?

(Yes i played t.o.s., i'm old enough to have been part of the fandom since its infancy)

Hmm he seems rather early in his journey since per T.o.s. 2 it wasn't even 5 years post canon before he lost contact with Yuan... Granted T.o.s. 2 is its own can of worms...


He had already scattered Cruxis' Exspheres into space.

Well thats answered then....

He could barely see where he left in the sky anymore.

Where he left sylvarant/tethealla's atmosphere? If so... well wow he's early on his celestial roadtrip... If he is that early out on his trip i am a bit surprised he didn't wait longer to drop the exspheres as there's probably some risk of them falling back into sylvarant/teth's atmosphere and starting the mess all over again...

No. He had to.

The howls of fandom cry out, screaming "no dont go, you dont have to!" But Lloyd had to get that stubborn from somewhere i guess.

He looked in the direction in the sky Derris-Kharlan had drifted from. Lloyd. He was back there. Kratos wondered, hoped, that he and his gaggle of friends were doing alright.

Well if this follows t.o.s. 2 canon.... probably not... hopefully this verse is gentler.

.He realized now the blood on his hands. The countless people Cruxis had killed he was complicit with.

Hello guilt trip, fist step, cosmos, as we convert all that bad karma into millage, all aboard....

Though if we multiply karma/dead by kratos' guilt tripping tendencies we might be floating on this rock until it hits the big bang....


He didn't deserve to stay home. He didn't deserve redemption. He didn't deserve a happy life with his son, the only family he had left.

Maybe to pre history the rate this is going...

Heading straight toward him.

Stars saying "hi" are never a good sign. And those insisting on face to face meet and greet are even worse...

Kratos woke up in a colorful, pulsating, void.

Summonspirits on stilts, is the Kratos Aurion going to do the pmd personality test? (Leans forward in anticipation).

"Oh, goody, it is you!" said the voice. "Listen, I know this is kind of sudden, but something's coming to my world and I need your help with it."

Hmm locationwise i would suspect the voice to be either jirachi (star/wish child and all that) but the irrelevence strikes me as very mew.


"...Why me?"


"You're... uniquely qualified.

You were the closest thing in grabbing range you mean....

I bring you over I need to ask you some questions."

Poor Kratos.....

"I-"


"First question! Do you like groan-inducing puns?"


"...Spare me."

....poor poor Kratos....


Do you occasionally consider yourself to be dull and overly cautious?"

Both Yuan and Lloyds subcons were prodded to produce this question. Theres no other reason as to why its here.


Derris-Kharlan hasn't encountered any aliens yet... so yes, I suppose."

Well wish granted i guess... and condolences.... welcome to tonal whiplash starting in five... four... three... two...
The void turned a blinding white before Kratos lost consciousness again.

One!

Chapter 1 review

miniblitz status 3/5



Kratos stirred, groaned, and finally opened his eyes.

I'm surprised he could be clonked out. Granted, canonically cruxis crystals and biological functions make about as much sense as making antimatter into the foundations of a house... but ah well...

What he saw was blue sky, much more blue than on Derris-Kharlan. He tilted his head a bit, saw trees, grass, and -

I bet he gets a partner right about now... is it a pikachu? Something vibrant and eyeseering to make him die inside?


"Hey you! You're finally awake!"


What Kratos saw next to him was a small, black-and-red fox wearing a teal robe, with inquisitive blue eyes staring right at him.

Hmmm is it a galar nickit or a zoroark?

then realized he wasn't himself. His body was now much, much smaller

I bet Genis is feeling vindicated and wondering why. Also, hello new complex for Kratos. It'll fit nicly with its few hundred other friends in Aurions head....

"How... How did this happen?"

Blame the star.

"Someone must have knocked you out!" said the fox.

Yep Mr. "Water is wet" that they sure did!

Kratos gave the fox a look.

Lloyd's getting shivers right now, dejavu as well as a goose waddling over his grave. An au away and his human-Dad's displeasure is clipping him, no doubt about it. And so is Colette(per headcanon marrying Lloyd eventually) except its Colette so shes chirping "Hi Kratos!" at the empty air...

"It must have been a feral Pokemon... Do you remember anything about it?"

Mr. Foxy is asking the wrong question here....

"No... and I mean... What am I?"

I'm surprised he isnt asking for info on the new term he just heard... though i am a tiny bit disappinted he isnt shaking out a wing/hand and looking at it in utter disbelief while mentally going...

"I got turned into a level one, temple of Iselia, baby encounter. The one Genis killed by flailing his kendama at it accidentally."


The fox gasped. "Oh no! You must have amnesia! Uh, you're a Noibat! Though, not like any Noibat I've ever seen. Your colors are all different..."

Well at least he didnt say wrong. Or worse "shiny". Right?
"So I'm a creature known as a Noibat, then."

And if you dont stop parroting things Aurion i'm going to nickname you echo in my review notes.

"Yeah! And I'm a Zorua! My name's Edbark. Do you remember yours?"

Well thats one mystery licked... can we call him Ed for short? Will kratos pull an icy "mr. Bark" when he gets mad at them?

I'll be sure to help get your memories back!"

Yeah (chagrined noise) about that....

"I don't need-"


"Come on! I'll take you to a doctor in the city."

I'm surprised he went willingly. Also how is his locomotion as a noi' hopping and fluttering? Full on flying?

Edbark started to trot off. Kratos sighed and started to try and follow, only to stumble over. Edbark turned back and gasped.

"Oh no! You've forgotten how to walk!"

Well that answers that. Kratos is lucky he knows how to brea- wait, his crystal is tied to his mana/self and body... does he have his fun cruxis abilities... because if so he might not need to breathe i mean some of the angels and welgia kinda didnt.


Wait, what happened to the angels in Welgia? They get sucked into this too as npcs?

Lifeless pokemon... shudders...


I just need to get used to this new body..."

Subtlity thy name... is Yuan,and is co-owned by Zelos... Kratos only gets to hear rumors of its existince. Ditto for tact.


Eventually, the duo reached the outskirts of what seemed to be a city. There were many houses both small and large and dirt roads, as well as towering buildings which Kratos could only fathom a guess at the purpose of.

No towers though, thats good right?

Having figured out how to walk by himself, Kratos went closer and saw the city was populated not by humans or elves or half-elves or dwarves or even angels, but by a staggering array of different animals, plants, and even inanimate objects, all moving around as if they were people.

Wait can he encounter that sword ghost mon? I can only imagine his brain would break at the encounter. You know if it isnt completely scrambled by the insanity of 900+ god mode capable critters mosying about...




"This is Rainbow Wing City!"

Ah Oh-hos terf, interesting....

"I thought you said I was a Noibat and you were a Zorua."

You think this is confusing wait until someone breaks down types to you....


"Noibat and Zorua are both kinds of Pokemon silly!"


"...I see."

I'm getting "old grandpa is trying desperatly to follow hyperactive sugar rush mode grandkid's mon rant" vibes here. And it fits on so many levels.


The two continued further on into Rainbow Wing City, passing various buildings and a great variety of Pokemon. Kratos marveled at the bazaars and shops and facilities run by colorful creatures he couldn't even count. Eventually the two reached what seemed to be a castle - Kratos noticed one of two in the city, along with a cathedral.

Ohf after the whole smackdown in Welgia castles are probably a nope for him. Especially if this is the Lloyd picked the Kratos route and Kratos marched in with the rest of the cast to put Mithos down...


"The Adventurer's Guild!" said Edbark."They can help you out!"

Oy youre bailing on repsonsibilites, you said you'd do it. Not that you'd hire an outside contractor to do it for the low low fee of 15 pokedollars...

Edbark dragged Kratos inside.

Again Genis is giggling and doesnt know why....


Kratos noticed more facilities and corridors and dormitories inside, as well as what seemed to be an... Inn? With a bar?

... Considering inn/bars were kinda a thing in Tethealla, and Kratos' seen a lot, i'm surprised he's baffled by the comingling of a tavern inn.


Eventually Edbark dragged Kratos into a central room.

I'm imaging claw marks everywhere as Kratos' last scratch of sanity is running the sub con and "accidentally" grabbing at every flat surface and latching on to slow this down...

Seated at the end of the room was a strange, cream-and-green mustelid-like creature wearing a red vest, flanked by two floating grayish blue automaton-like beings.
"Guildmaster, it's Edbark!" said one.


"And... some Noibat?" said another.


"I see, I see," said the mustelid. He approached the duo. "Edbark my boy! Who do you have here?"


"Guildmaster Stoakes!" said Edbark. "This is Kratos! Poor guy has amnesia! All he can remember is his own name... You gotta help him!"


Kratos was about to object that no, he did not have amnesia, he remembers the last four thousand years or so up until this point fine, but then he realized they probably weren't going to listen and decided to just roll with it.

... yeah he's in a world of Lloyds he going to be rolling a lot with things by the look of it....

A large pink oval with white tufts on her body and an egg nestled in a pouch on her belly now looked Kratos over.

Yeah chancy are preeety weird.... you know if he ever gets back and tells this tale no one is going to believe him. Ever. Just saying....


"Well," said the pink oval, who was apparently Nurse Betania, "This is odd. He doesn't seem to have head trauma or other trauma or any injuries at all! How the hell does he have amnesia?"

... he was dropped, nine weeks ago, and has been winging it since then...
"Well I wouldn't know." said Kratos.

I'm hearing camm clarks vkice right now saying that line in such a monotone...


Stoakes thought to himself a bit. "There's one possibility... Some nefarious Pokemon, somehow, wiped his memories."


"Well that gives us fuck-all evidence as to who!" said Betania, huffing.


"It seems it can't be helped." said Stoakes. He sighed, then turned to Kratos. "My offer for you to stay here still stands. Though... what do you remember?"


Kratos paused to think of a convincing reply. "...My name, Kratos Aurion. And apparently your language, basic functions of living, certain basic concepts... I remember nothing of this world or its people."

.... basic functions of living as in breathing? Because out of the gate he couldn't walk. And he probably has no clue of the economy, summons help him if he has to fight, or encounters a kid with a red and white pokeball.... he's stretchi g the truth taunter then a harp string.


"Hm. Awfully specific memory wipe," said Stoakes. "Whoever did this to you must have had a very strange goal in mind...

Yeah mew? Be like that....

"Hmph. Adopting another one, I see, Stoakes," said Betania.

The irony of Kratos getting adopted made me chuckle. He must be dying on the inside right now....

"I'll let Edbark explain that one, he gets excited about old myths and legends and stuff like that.

He's flashing back to Raines ruin mode, i just know it...


He headed off. Kratos paused, then sat on the bed of his new room and stared off into space.

So theres a ton of "he"s here, did Stok' head off, Em', or Kratos?[/SPOILER]
 

K_S

Unrepentent Giovanni and Rocket fan
review part 4/5 for mini blitz

Chapter 2 review


I imagine its going to be a daily ritual. Wake up, height check, soft chittering sigh... was Kratos' voice altered for being shunted into a keese's body?

He heard a knock on the door. He went over to check and opened it.It was Edbark.
How does he manage doors with his new limbs? Those hands are itty bitty and dont have thumbs and all...

"Hey Kratos! I gotta show you around!"
Kratos has got to be imagining Lloyd right now. This trip is going to be salt on that wound, every second of it.

Kratos sighed. "Please, show me around."
Or perhaps acid?

Edbark dragged him by the wing, taking him everywhere, explaining everything too fast for Kratos to fully process - the sleeping quarters they came from, game rooms, strategy rooms, the guildmaster's quarters - wasn't he just here yesterday? - the storeroom for equipment, the storeroom for food and items, sentry posts, the infirmary - he was also there yesterday - the vendors outside, bathrooms...
Again, Auroin's got an "old grandpa vibes dealing with young kid" aura...


Finally they came to a mess hall, attached to a kitchen and a bar. In the kitchen a strange apple-pie-dragon was busy cooking despite his squat body while a spiny purple rhino-rabbit handed drinks to thirsty Pokemon.


"And this is where everyone eats and drinks! Oh, you probably need breakfast, don't you?"


"I-"


Kratos' stomach rumbled. It seemed this new body needed food more than his angel one.
Click to expand...
Oh he's got bio needs back, and a new world where the foods literally going to be alien. This is going to go well... i wonder how things are going to work because between berries being a main staple, the question of meat, and gummies.... cuisine is always an interesting mystery dungeon experience.

"Hey Edbark!" he said. "'Bout time you got here!" He raised an eyebrow at Kratos. "Who's this?"
We got a cosplaying ratatta... and I bet he's besties with Ed'...


"Yes, that's me, the poor poor amnesiac," Kratos said.
Ohh a wild sarcasm has apppeared...
"Ow, geez, that's rough," said Ricki. "Well you can sit with us, we'd appreciate the company!"
He's going to get adopted into the social outcast clicke... this has so many nods to the Kharlan war its starting to hurt my feels.

Kratos thought to himself. Did he really need to babysit a bunch of children again? Especially when neither of them were his son?
Unless he makes tracks Kratos is going to be taking that job, fate.is sadistic like that....

Too late. Edbark turned toward Kratos, eyes sparkling.
Hello Raine jr.

Kratos barely stopped himself from frowning. Something about this seemed familiar in a way he didn't like.
Yeah its looking mighty familiar isnt it? If there is somethung shady about the operation though he doesn't have insider lore to figure that out easily at the moment...


"Ha! Kratos gets me!" said Edbark.
Nah he's just being polite....

"Those are gummis!" said Edbark, eating some himself. "They're what makes Poke-society go round!"
Huh so this is food 101. Poor kratos is going to be in for a ride...


""Unless Kratos has any more questions.
Kratos would like a ticket out, perhaps a drink, and his real body, in probably that order...

Out of curiousiy why did you pick ghost/dark mon for your vilians... or rather fir that spot of ominous foreshadowing.... besides the obvious pun material opportunities?

city built around an altar.
I'm getting asgard fake seal vibes... and i'm sure Kratos is getting trauma...

greater than the angelic power he once had.
Ouch kfc 'mon is stronger than Kratos' old form... thats got to sting a bit.


"Is this an omen? Of what?"
I'm more concerned about resource harvesting than omens. Exploding and gathering bit of devine cast off to fuel forbidden weapons ect is practically staple evil overlord list 101.


"Did the Empire do this?"
I see another history lesson in the wings...
"Er? Kratos? Unusual request at a time like this but... You have an audience with the Queen. And Ho-Oh himself."
Yeah this is going to go well...

Edbark and Ricki gasped.

"Wow really? Cool!" said Edbark.
Cue needing a crowbar to unhook thing one and two....

"We won't do it again." said Ferrite.
I somehow doubt that...


Kratos sighed. Then he told them everything. The last four thousand years or so, Mithos, Yggdrasil, Yuan, Anna, Lloyd, Lloyd's friends, the quest they all went through... the only thing he left out (since he did not feel the probing Psychic presence of Ferrite and Pearlite) was any mention that none of those involved were Pokemon. By the end of his very long tale the jaws of all the other Pokemon had dropped in shock.
The fact hes not mentioning attacks, what mon they are, ect are going to be broad hints the cast aren't mon... but i dont think this crowd is going to pick that up.


"I accept," said Kratos.
Says the man who doesnt know what an adventure squad is... besides what some hyper teen mon chittered at him over breakfast....

"Actually," said Kratos. "I want Edbark and Ricki's help."
Those two are going to die of happiness.

"Team Symphonia."
Someones homesick methinks....

And so the adventure begins...




5/5 miniblitz review

Chapter 3 review



"Uh, actually," said Edbark. "I dunno. I didn't think we'd get this far."

"Seriously?!" saiud Riki.
Candidly with Kratos perchance for studying the stars i'm surprused he couldnt triangulate the shooting star roughly and give them a heading...

There, down the path, was a stand, manned by a Charmeleon, an Eeevee, and a Pachisru.
Kratos being narriator (reads ahead to doublechrck there wasnt a perspective flip) I'm surprised he knows these mon by speicies already.


"It's a lovely Meteor-Find-Inator! With it you'll find where that strange meteor landed in no time."
I almost wish Yuan was here... the roast fest that would insue... as itnis I suspect Kratos is going to have to gently comandeer control over the money pouch at this point...


Yeah Kratos didn't trust this.
Gotta give the scammers nods for being that on top of things though. Its been what.. 12 hrs at most?


"I want you two to know this is most definitely a scam."

"I didn't see any of them use Slam," said Edbark, confused.
The Lloyd vibes are so strong with this one...

"Rip us off of what?" said Edbark. "We're not on anything sticky."
Kratos must be dying, inside and out...

"It oh so pains me to do this," said Lumine, holding a claw to his head in seeming emotional pain. "But if you won't give us your money..."

He suddenly leapt forward, toward Kratos.

"We'll take it!"
yep, bandit fight... this has got to be a bit of a flashback for Kratos all things considered.

Kratos' instincts kicked in.

He rushed in front of Edbark to defend them, leaped up, ready to call upon his sword and even his Exsphere-

-Only to realize he had none of it left, and he only sent a few blades of air in Lumine's direction before falling flat on his face.
So... did everyone overlook that Kratos is
A) unevolved
B) level 1
C) amnsiac
D) has no clue how to fight

Including Kratos himself? Ouch.

"Is that seriously what you're called?" said Kratos from atop Riki's shoulder.
Yeah they are worse then names than Mr. "Moths to the flames" is about originality...


...Well, Edbark and Riki were screaming. Kratos was just annoyed.
I'm guessing theure going to find a mystery dungeon at the end of this, that'd be thier luck. Looks at description of the walls and... yep... called it.


"Y-yeah, and if this one grows it'll overtake everything! Which is why we g-gotta stop it!"
Sounds rightly terrorfied tbh...

A large glowing, flickering, orb, embedded above them, warping the plant matter about it, spitting out small chunks of itself to spread around the dungeon.

"There's the core!" said Edbark. "We gotta kill it!"
Well that was a quick find.

So question. Gummies come from mystery dungeons. But dungeons are bad aka all consuming self populigating borg ships with an organic twist. Adventure groups have the duty to cull dungeon cores (which leads to another question of what happens to the bewitched ex-squads?) and beat back dungeons...

But if all the dungeons are beat back, how can society function without access to the gummies keeping civilized mon... civil?

From an outsider looking in the whole proceedings seems like an exercise in society wide self destruction.

Kratos couldn't stop staring in horror at the core. It seemed like... It was staring back.

He shook his head and fired more air blades at the thing.

The core shuddered, pulsed, then fired a laser at Kratos as a crack appeared on its surface.

Kratos fluttered out of the way just in time as Riki clawed at the orb and Edbark fired blasts of darkness at it. Cracks continued to form on the orb as it fired more lasers until finally it started shaking violently.

"It's gonna blow! Get back!"
Click to expand...
I have to admit fighting the core of the dungeon is a neat idea that gamefreak could impliment if they get back t9 the pmd series... besides remakes...

And it was over. The dungeon was gone. They were on the forest floor again. A bunch of confused Starly, Sentret, and Zigzagoon gained their bearings and fled into the woods. Edbark cheered.
Well that kinda answers thst. Still if anyones from town they might need an escort home.. but this batch seem to be regular wild mon, not townies.


"Woo! We did it! We beat a mystery dungeon!"

"We did," said Riki. "But weren't we on our way to find that meteor?"
In which kratos is not holder of the groups sole attention span. Yay? I guess?
There, far off in the distance, was a city.

"We found something!" said Edbark.
You know i've been making jokes about Edbark being like Lloyd... i take it back... he's a Colette. And i can hear Kratos' grey hairs coming in from here.
 

Attachments

  • 1746230230497.gif
    1746230230497.gif
    42 bytes · Views: 1
  • 1746230230548.gif
    1746230230548.gif
    42 bytes · Views: 1
  • 1746230230596.gif
    1746230230596.gif
    42 bytes · Views: 1

133TFR33k

Creator of the Doduo Alliance
Partners
  1. doduo
Review:
Chapter 3: Dungeon Master's Guide


Chapter 3: Dungeon Master's Guide
Odd name for a chapter. Sounds interesting.

Kratos, Edbark, and Riki made their way down the path out of the city into a forested area.

"So," said Kratos. "How do we find this mystery meteor? I'd say look for a crater but that only works up close."

"Uh, actually," said Edbark. "I dunno. I didn't think we'd get this far."
Off to an impressive start I see lol

"Seriously?!" saiud Riki.

Kratos sighed. "Maybe we should ask the locals."

"What locals? Only wild Pokemon this deep in the woods.""

"What about them?" said Edbark, pointing a paw.

There, down the path, was a stand, manned by a Charmeleon, an Eeevee, and a Pachisru.

"Hey maybe they can help!" said Riki. He rushed over, and Edbark and Kratos followed.

"Welcome, welcome, welcome!" said the Charmeleon, noticing their approach. "I'm Lumine."

"I'm Susan," the Eevee said haughtily, brushing fur from her eyes.

"I'm Chad!" said the Pachisru enthusiastically.

"Do you know the way to that meteor that fell recently?" said Kratos, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah yes!" said Lumine, nodding. "We can help you!"

Kratos already didn't trust this.
Yeah.. this seems sketchy....

"Ooh, help us how?" said Edbark.

"We know a few tricks!" said Susan.

"We have..." Chad held up a strange... device? It just looked like a bunch of metal parts mashed together. "This!"

"What is it?" said Riki.

"It's a lovely Meteor-Find-Inator! With it you'll find where that strange meteor landed in no time."

Yeah Kratos didn't trust this.
What he doesn't?

Now, now, now don't be shy Mr Kratos, all their products are guaranteed for life and come with a 2-day warranty!

"...Edbark, Riki? A moment, if you will?"

The three got in a huddle.

"I want you two to know this is most definitely a scam."

"I didn't see any of them use Slam," said Edbark, confused.

"No, no! SCAM!" said Riki. "It's like when they're trying to rip us off!"

"Rip us off of what?" said Edbark. "We're not on anything sticky."

"He means cheat you out of your money," said Kratos.

"Oh. That. That's mean!" said Edbark.
Lil Eddie doesn't have any clue just how fortunate he is to have Kratos with him! :copyka:

Its like he is the embodiment of naive oblivion. Ok that's his new title: Lil Eddie: Embodiment of Oblivious Naivete.:mewlulz:

"Right, so we just refuse and move on," said Kratos.

"Are you three done yet? What are you even talking about?" said Susan.

"Okay, so!" Riki said, turning to face the three and holding Edbark close. "My buddy Edbark here, see, his dad was a Fairy type so he's uh, allergic to all that metal. So we'll pass.

"Is that actually a thing?" said Edbark, whispering.

"Listen if they can bullshit us we can bullshit them," said Riki, whispering back.

The trio of merchants stared then got into their own huddle, whispering intensely.
lol they are not giving up! :mewlulz:

Finally they turned back to the group, seemingly somber looks on their faces.

"It oh so pains me to do this," said Lumine, holding a claw to his head in seeming emotional pain. "But if you won't give us your money..."

He suddenly leapt forward, toward Kratos.

"We'll take it!"
First action scene incoming! :wowzard:

Kratos' instincts kicked in.

He rushed in front of Edbark to defend them, leaped up, ready to call upon his sword and even his Exsphere-

-Only to realize he had none of it left, and he only sent a few blades of air in Lumine's direction before falling flat on his face.
Old habits certainly die hard.

This did cause Lumine to stagger back a bit. Riki grabbed Kratos and turned to Edbark.

"Run!"

The two, Kratos in tow, fled down the forest path, the theiving trio in hot pursuit.
Should be "thieving"

Running certainly does seem to be the best option for the moment. Kratos needs to get used to fighting in his new form!

"The Rascal Rouges always get their prize!" said Stella.

"Yeah! Even if we have to beat mons up!" said Chad.

"Is that seriously what you're called?" said Kratos from atop Riki's shoulder.

"I like it!" said Edbark. "And hold on..."

Suddenly the fleeing trio disappeared. The pursuing trio skidded to a halt.

"Where did they go?!" said Chad.

"Curses!" said Lumine. "One of them's a Zorua! He used his Illusion ability! They could be anywhere!

"Start searching then!" said Susan.

The three started combing through trees and bushes.
So long suckers! :mewlulz:

--------------------

Some distance away, within the trees, a shimmering revealed Kratos, Edbark, and Riki.

"Nice one Edbark!" said Riki.

"Thanks! I've been practicing," said Edbark.
Good job, Lil Eddie. *Pats*

"Hey guys?" said Edbark. "Does the forest floor feel... loose to you? Like it could give way any second?"

It was that exact second that the forest floor indeed gave way and the three tumbled screaming below.

...Well, Edbark and Riki were screaming. Kratos was just annoyed.
Kratos' reaction here is great in contrast with the other two! :mewlulz:

Kratos and Riki did. And it was then they saw that the walls of the place they fell in were twisting and moving like coiled serpents, with strange chunks of glowing, flickering matter embedded within.

"This isn't a pitfall. This is a m-mystery dungeon," said Edbark.
And finally now we are here! :wowzard:

Why do I have the feeling the Rogues ended up falling in here too separately? Perhaps we will be seeing them again much sooner than Kratos and his merry band would think!

"...Oh. Oh that ain't good," said Riki.

"You mentioned these, Edbark... Said they were a disease on reality?" said Kratos.

"Y-yeah, and if this one grows it'll overtake everything! Which is why we g-gotta stop it!"

"You don't sound very convinced," said Kratos.

"The chatterbox is right though," said Riki. "These things grow fast and absorb everything!"

"Yeah! We gotta find the core!" said Edbark.

"Very well," said Kratos. "I will assist you."

Where had he heard this all before?
Reminds me of the world tree in Symphonia.

"Now where is that core?" said Edbark.

"It should be deeper in!" said Edbark. "Follow me! I can smell it!"
I get the feeling Lil Eddie: Embodiment of Oblivious Naivete, CANT actually smell it. He just has an gut feeling that he is assuming is correct. If he leads them to a dead-end its going to be pretty funny...

Before the group were some strange gray and white birds, along with multiples of two different kinds of striped mammals, one that sat on its tail and another that zigzagged around. All, noticeably, had a flckery, unnatural glow to their eyes.

"Oh no... Dungeon ferals," said Edbark. "Some Starly, Zigzagoon, and

"How are they different from regular ferals?" said Kratos.

"Regular ferals just kinda... exist," said Edbark. "They theoretically can think as well as we can, but all their thought processes are focused on survival. Hiding from predators, being predators, eating, making Eggs. Dungeon ferals are ferals that got corrupted by the dungeon's influence. They now only exist to aid the dungeon's spread and protect it from anything. Anyone."

"Yeah they won't stop until you're dead, chased out, or assimilated," said Riki.
Wow that's pretty terrifying. Its almost like hive-mind zombie mons!

Kratos was reminded of the balance back home, the journey of the Chosen, the two worlds, the expspheres, how it all added back up to something very wrong, something he was instrumental in. He knew he was going to have to get to the bottom of this some way, somehow.
That's right Kratos, you owe it to the multi-verse!

"Is there any way we can defeat them?" said Kratos. "Or get around them?"

"That I don't know," said Edbark. They are blocking our way..."

"Charge through them, catch them by suprise with attacks, then try to make an escape," said Kratos.

"Sounds good!" said Riki. "But uh... Can you fight?"
He CAN fight, but can he fight WELL? That is the question!

"I did fire those blades of air back wiith the Rascal Rouges... If I can do it again..."
should be "with"

He doesn't sound sure he can do it again. Why not practice on a wall to double-check first?

"Alright!" said Edbark. "L-let's do this!"
I've got a bad feeling about this...

And then they charged.

The dungeon ferals weren't sure how to react at first as the trio barreled through, but after they got their bearings they lunged without hesitation. The trio countered with blades of air, pulses of darkness, and strong bites, holding them back.

Eventually, fighting their way past the group of dungeon ferals, they saw a path to a glow down below.

"There's our escape!" said Edbark. "Come on!"
Worried for nothing apparently...

The three rushed down the path, then skidded to a halt when they saw what was the other side.

A large glowing, flickering, orb, embedded above them, warping the plant matter about it, spitting out small chunks of itself to spread around the dungeon.

"There's the core!" said Edbark. "We gotta kill it!"

Kratos couldn't stop staring in horror at the core. It seemed like... It was staring back.
Core's are creepy. Noted.

He shook his head and fired more air blades at the thing.

The core shuddered, pulsed, then fired a laser at Kratos as a crack appeared on its surface.

Kratos fluttered out of the way just in time as Riki clawed at the orb and Edbark fired blasts of darkness at it. Cracks continued to form on the orb as it fired more lasers until finally it started shaking violently.
I'm surprised Kratos didn't make a reference to a basic unison attack while all this was going on.

"It's gonna blow! Get back!"

The orb, indeed, blew as the three tossed themselves out of the way.

Immediately, the dungeon twisted in a massive upheaval as the group were pushed upward and upward and upward -

And it was over. The dungeon was gone. They were on the forest floor again. A bunch of confused Starly, Sentret, and Zigzagoon gained their bearings and fled into the woods. Edbark cheered.
Ah, so the ferals return to normal after.

He and Edbark rushed ahead, Kratos sighed and followed.

Not much had changed.
Kratos continues to amuse.

I'm so jealous of all the fan art you have. These are so cool!

This chapter was essentially the start of their journey together and established several things as it went.

Good chapter!
 
Last edited:

133TFR33k

Creator of the Doduo Alliance
Partners
  1. doduo
Review:
Chapter 4: Party Assemble


Hello again, Umbra!

I'm here for the next review in our exchange!

Wait a minute... am I the FIRST person to review your chapter 4 when it was posted so long ago? I feel your pain! 😭

Chapter 4: Party Assemble
Party Assemble? I thought the party already was assembled. Hmmm.

Kratos, Edbark, and Riki approached the town they had found. It was a small, simple affair, nothing like Rainbow Wing City, but it was still bustling with Pokemon.

"This will be a good pit stop after all of THAT," said Riki.

"Recuperating is probably wise yes," said Kratos.
A fair point. It was pretty intense.

They eventually arrived in the town in question proper. Things were mostly looking normal so far.

Until they saw one group of Pokemon in particular.

Three Pokemon - one resembling a small unicorn, one resembling a lump of coal, and one resembling an octopus - were in the middle of a heated argument.
It is pretty funny with Kratos describing all the Pokemon having no clue what they are, but I'm surprised Kratos doesn't have a book he can read during breaks on his to familiarize himself with the different Pokemon of the world and their general abilities. Kratos is pretty well-learned after all.

"Whadya think that's about?" said Edbark.

Kratos, admittedly, was curious too, and tuned his large ears in to listen.
Ever aware of his surroundings, Kratos.

"Clearly, I'm best equipped to get rid of it, with my natural guiles," said the unicorn.

"No. I have the practical knowledge." said the lump of coal.

"No, I can punch it!" said the octopus.

"And what exactly is "it?"" said Kratos.

"Oh it's terrible!" said the unicorn.

"Awful." said the lump of coal.

"Bad!" said the octopus.

"You haven't answered his question..." said Edbark.
I'm surprised this line didn't come from Kratos. Lil Eddie: Embodiment of Oblivious Naivete, strikes me as a bit of an airhead.

"Oh," said the lump of coal. "There's a Snorlax in the middle of town. It won't go away."
I'm just going to go with it at this point and stop trying to figure out which Pokemon are what. It will let me see things better from Kratos's point of view and it will be amusing.

Ah so they have a Snorlax problem to deal with. This should be interesting.

Kratos blinked, but his face remained deadpan. "What's a Snorla?"
Did Kratos forget the x at the end of Snorlax this line or did you? I can't tell if this is a narrative feature or a typo.

The others went silent and stared.

"He's... got amnesia," said Edbark, nervously.

"Sure.. Thing, said the unicorn. "Anyway I doubt any of you can help."
LOL they just ignore Kratos completely here.

"Hey!" said Riki. "We could TOTALLY help!"

"Well if we can't do anything how can you?" said the octopus.

"We'll- We'll see!" said Riki. "Right guys?"

Edbark looked to Kratos expectantly. "I... Guess we should help right?"
Lil Eddie? Really? You don't even explain what it is and you are looking to Kratos to decide?! :wowzard:

Kratos did not like the big eager eyes Edbark was giving him.
If only he knew what he was blindly getting himself into lol....

"...If you insist."

"Great!" said Edbark. "Let's get going!"

The group promptly went further into the town.

--------

Upon reaching the center of the town they all finally saw it.

A massive bear-cat of a Pokemon, fat and round, asleep in the middle of town and blocking the intersection of various streets.

"They're... Huge..." said Edbark.
Lil Eddie can't tell the gender of the Snorlax?

"SEE why we can't get rid of this thing?!" said the unicorn.

"Pssh, it'll be fine for us," said Riki.

"Sure it will be," said the lump of coal.

"No really!" said Riki indignantly. "We can do it!"

"Y-yeah sure we can..." said Edbark.

Kratos sighed and went to inspect this "Snorlax." It did not budge at his approach, snoring away peacefully. Kratos looked it over further. No apparent weaknesses in this thing's immense bulk. He suddenly wasn't sure if there WAS anything to be done about this massive beast.

Then he had a thought. It was obviously asleep. But what if he woke it with a sufficiently loud noise?

He took a deep breath And then attempted to let out a yell.

It came out as a booming, piercing batlike shriek that knocked him on his back, This caused the Snorlax to bolt upright.

"Oh good," said the unicorn. "It's awa-"

The Snorlax stood up and let out a roar.
Uh oh... battle incoming! (Presumably)

"...Oh."

"You've done it now," said the lump of coal.

"What do we do?!" said Edbark.

"We FIGHT IT obviously!" said the octopus.

"I GUESS!" said Riki.

"Seems like it's our only option..." said Kratos.

And they rushed in to engage the angry beast.

The Snorlax retaliated by throwing a karate chop strong enough to shatter bricks at Kratos. It hit him full on, but strangely did not hurt as much as one would expect it to.
Ah a fighting type move when Kratos has wings. I assume that is what is going on here.

Kratos retaliated with a scythe of air from his wings. The Snorlax roared, and roared further rom a flurry of rocks from the lump of coal, before body slamming them.
"rom"? I believe this is a typo and it's the kind that makes me confused what you are trying to convey here.

The lump of coal was sent flying,
:ROFLMAO:

but the octopus leapt up and punched her right back at the Snorlax's forehead.
What the... :copyka:

The unicorn fired a psychic blade at the Snorlax's soft belly, with Ricki biting its foot and causing it to stagger. It promptly lunged at an image of Edbark... Only for the image to dissipate and the real Edbark to jump out, send out a blast of dark energy, and knock the Snorlax flat.
Nice combo moves here!

The Snorlax got to its feet, but instead of continuing to attack it ran straight out of the city, not looking back. The townsfolk cheered.

"Woah... We did it!" said Edbark.

"Heck yeah!" said Riki.

"And it was all thanks to you, dear Noibat!" said the unicorn.

"I suppose..." said Kratos. "And you all are?"

"Oh! I'm Faxi," said the unicorn. "I'm a Ponyta."
Ah, good to know!

"Fornax. Rolycoly." said the lump of coal."
No idea what that is, but it's name sounds fitting.

"I'm Laila! I'm a Clobbopus! I CLOBBER!" said the octopus.
:ROFLMAO:

"Right," said Kratos. "Well we best be going..."

"Going where?" said Faxi.

Kratos was about to ignore them when Edbark chimed in. "We're going to find that strange meteor that fell during The Seeking!"

"It's a super special important mission!" said Riki.

"Really? Well we want in!" said Laila.
How does Laila know that without asking the others?! :wowzard:

"Just wandering before. Could use a destination." said Fornax.,

"And this is a cause worthy of my splendor!" said Faxi.

...Oh no, thought Kratos.
They already proved themselves. I'm not sure what Kratos is complaining about here. I bet if you described his thoughts a little more it would likely be amusing. It's ALMOST amusing as it is currently.

He sighed. "Fine..."

Edbark and Riki cheered.

"Then let's be off!" said Faxi.

"TO ADVENTURE!" said Laila.

"Yay," said Fornax.

And the party shuffled their way out of the town, and onward.

***
Short and important indeed! Three new party members all at once!

A short one, but an important one that I wanted to expedite - meet the rest of our party! You will learn More of their stories over time. See you next time whenever the fuck that is.
Nothing wrong with getting to the point a little quicker if it's what you want.

Closing thoughts:
As usual, you inject some good humor into each chapter!

A big party sounds cumbersome to write. Props to you for taking on the challenge!

Should be interesting to see where things go from here. I have no idea!
 
Last edited:
Chapter 6 New

Umbramatic

The Ghost Lord
Premium
Location
The Yangverse
Pronouns
Any
Partners
  1. reshiram
  2. zygarde
These continue to take a while because my writing brain is still kinda bleh. However I've committed to trying to write faster for my big projects in particular and hope to increase my writing speed back to an acceptable level over time.

But enough about that. I've got a freshly baked chapter to share. So hold on to your houses because it's:


Chapter 6: Mansion Mania

The group of Pokemon entered the creaky old house. Edbark looked around, shivering nervously.

"Is. Is this place really haunted?"

"There are some superstitions to that degree," said Heinwald, "but it is undoubtedly filled with feral Ghost types."

Edbark shuddered. Riki laughed and patted him on the back. "Relax, Edbark! You're a Dark-type! Ghost types are no trouble for you!"

Kratos tilted his head. "What... does that mean?"

The others all turned to stare and blink at him. Finally Riki spoke up.

"Oh right. The amnesia. Guys, let's explain type matchups to him, gently."

The group mumbled to themselves a bit as Kratos stared in further confusion.

"Well... all Pokemon have these attributes called Types, right?" said Edbark.

"They're kind of like... elements!" said Laila. "Mine is Fighting, which is the punch element!"

"Pokemon can have two elements," said Heinwald. "For example, I, an Obstagoon, am Normal and Dark."

"Anyway, types are strong and weak against each other," said Faxi. "Like my Psychic type is good against Laila's Fighting - "

"HEY!" said Laila.

"But Laila's Fighting is good against my Rock," said Fornax.

"It gets real complicated," Curran said. "You could almost make a huge graph with how types stack against each other..."

"Does any of that make sense?" said Riki.

Kratos considered this. "There were concepts of elements in his home world even if they worked... rather differently. So he did kind of understand.

"I... guess so?" he said. "Your elements interact with each other in complex ways?"

Edbark sighed in relief. "Okay I think he gets it. At least kinda."

"Can we get back to what we came here for then?"said Curran. "This culprit isn't going to catch himself."

"Oh right," said Riki. "We need to do that."

The group started mumbling murmurs of assent and started moving further into the mansion. The mansion was dark and quiet. Occasionally the group could see flickers of odd miasma floating through the corridors. Every time this would happen Edbark would flinch.

"Don't worry Eddie," said Riki. "Like I said, you can take 'em. We all can."

Suddenly something moved in the shadows. Edbark screamed. Riki screamed and jumped behind Edbark. Everyone else sprang to attention.

"That could be our culprit!" said Heinwald.

"Let's get them!" said Curran.

The two gave chase. After collecting themselves the others followed. They all rushed down the corridors after the shadow. Eventually, they started catching up with it. They seemed to have cornered it.

"We've finally got you!" said Laila.

"Confess to your crimes," said Fornax flatly.

"H-Huh?" said the figure.

Gold rings flared to life, outlining the silhouette of a strange black fox-like Pokemon. The glow highlighted its accessories - a large brown hat and backpack, as well as glasses. His eyes behind the glasses showed worry

"What crimes? I'm just here to study artifacts!"

Heinwald blinked. "You... you don't seem like our target."

"I mean he still could be," said Faxi. "Just because he doesn't look suspicious doesn't mean he isn't suspicious."

The fox let out a "meep" noise. Kratos cocked his eyebrow.

"My judge of character says this... Pokemon is most likely innocent. Most likely."

"He has a point," said Curran. "This Umbreon doesn't smell like a culprit."

"Yeah, I agree," said Riki. "Doesn't seem like he has it in him."

"At least he’s not a ghost..." said Edbark.

"Dude, I'm right here," said a passing doglike Pokemon with a candle on its head. Edbark jumped and screamed. The dog sighed and walked away.

"Anyway," said the fox, apparently called an Umbreon. "My name's Milo! I'm an archaeologist! I was looking for a rare artifact said to be hidden in this old mansion!"

Edbark's eyes widened and sparkled. "What kind of artifact?"

"Well... it's a special jar! Said to be left over from the lost Alakagross civilization!"

There were multiple ooohs from everyone, aside from Kratos. He wasn't particularly sure who these Alakagross were. And regardless he wasn't sure about the fact they were getting.... distracted. He thought he should perhaps speak up about that actually.

"Maybe we should-"

"We should help you look!" said Edbark.

Oh no.

The others started to voice their agreement in unison. Kratos felt like he was going to shrivel on the spot. Milo just nodded and smiled.

"Well! We'd best get started then! I think I saw something interesting around this hallway..."

"Ooh! Let's go there then!" said Riki.

The party started moving down the hallway in question. Kratos let out a low grumbling noise and followed.

-----

The group had made their way further into the mansion. The ghosts still lurked about, but there was no sign of what they were looking for.

"Are we sure it's in here?" said Curran. "We've been searching... a while."

"I'm getting bored," said Fornax.

Milo fidgeted nervously. "W-Well let's not get carried away here! This is a big mansion! It could be anywhere! I t-totally didn't miscalculate!"

Edbark frowned. "Maybe the artifact isn't actually here..."

"Perhaps it is a red herring..." said Heinwald.

Milo was starting to look distraught. "W-wait! Being an archeologist isn't easy You gotta-"

Laila perked up. "Hey! There's something over there!"

Everyone spun around, searching wildly. Riki finally noticed something in a corner.

"There!"

The others looked to see a shadow. A shadow that was moving.

Edbark yelped. "It's a monster!"
“It's our culprit is what it is!" said Heinwald.

"Hold it right there!" said Curran.

The shadow froze. Then came a scream. The shadow started to recede rapidly.

"After it!" said Laila.

"That's my line..." said Curran.

The group chased after the shadow. Kratos sighed and followed. Great. More distractions.

They raced through the corridors as the shadow continued to duck and weave. Finally, they had it cornered.

"We've got you now!" said Riki.

The shadow screamed. "Wait! Please, I'm innocent! Don't hurt me!"

A frog-like Pokemon in the most garishly orange outfit Kratos had ever seen stepped into view. He held up his webbed hands in surrender. Milo perked up.

"Oh! Kobayashi! What are you doing here?"

Kratos looked at Milo quizzically. "You know this... frog?"

"Hey!" said Milo. "Kobayashi is my friend!"

"Milo!" said Kobayashi. "It's so good to see you! Especially in a place like this... what are you doing here?"

"Me? I was looking for a lost Alakagross jar!"

"Jar? You mean like this?"

He pulled out a strange, vase-like object. It was a silvery color and glowed with odd blue lights. Everyone but Kratos oohed and aahed, especially Milo.

"Oh!" said Milo. " That's it! That's what I was looking for!"

"Well good thing I found it," said Kobayashi. "It's all yours!"

He handed it to Milo. Milo placed it in his very large backpack.

"Well, all's well that ends well,' said Heinwald.

"Say, what are YOU doing here?" said Edbark.

Kobayashi stuttered. "Well, um. You see..... I was here to... find anything interesting for Milo! And look, I found something! Haha, I actually did it!"

Kratos narrowed his eyes.

Curran looked around. "Well, if our business is done we ought to get out of here. Not exactly the most pleasant place."

Edbark shuddered. "Agreed."

------------

The group emerged from the mansion. They stretched and took in the sunlight. Kratos, however, was still glaring daggers at Kobayashi. Kobayashi eventually noticed and turned to him.

"Yes?"

"...Can I ask you a question?"

"...Sure?"

"What... Do you do for a living?"

"...Huh?"

"What's your occupation?"

"...Why are you asking this?"

"I'm just curious."

"Uh, well, it, uh... it's funny, you should... I mean, you see, the.. Oh yes! My job! I have to do that! See you!"

And with that he scurried off.

Heinwald blinked. "Odd fellow."

Curran turned to Milo. "What was his job anyway?"

Milo thought a bit. "You know, he's honestly never told me..."

"Judging from his attire he must be... a plumber!" said Heinwald.

"Yeah that scans," said Curran.

Kratos wanted to ram his head into the pavement.

"Anyway we should probably head to... where we were actually going," said Edbark.

"Yeah, this was quite the detour," said Riki.

"Those bad guys won't punch themselves!" said Laila.

"Was this even about punching bad guys?" said Faxi.

"Who cares," said Fornax.

Kratos sighed. "We should probably head out, yes." He really wanted to leave this mess behind. But...

He turned to the detectives. "I'll keep on the lookout for any leads. As well as anyone... suspicious."

"Much appreciated!" said Heinwald.

"We'll need it," said Curran.

They headed off. Kratos turned back to the others.

"Let's just g-"

"Oh my! You all seem like a colorful bunch."

Kratos sighed. What now? He turned to see a strange crystal-like creature floating in the air near the group, dressed in unusual garb.

"And you are...?"

"Just a wandering Carbink traveller. How about you?"

"We're adventurers!" said Edbark.

"We're trying to find out what's up with this freaky meteor," said Riki.

"Oh yes! I saw that in the skies not too long ago.... It's odd. And concerning. Glad someone's on top of it."

"Yeah, we'll get it done!" said Laila.

"Eventually," said Fornax.

"Say what are you doing here?" said Faxi.

"Oh me?" said the Carbink. "I'm something of an alchemist... I came here to look for rare materials."

An alchemist, huh, thought Kratos. I guess it makes sense that something like that exists in this world.

"Speaking of, I best be off," said the Carbink."Hopefully I'll see you all later!"

He winked, then floated off.

What is THIS one planning? Thought Kratos.

"Anyway... he said. "We should probably leave for real now."

"This detour's taken long enough..." said Fornax.

"To adventure!" said Edbark.

They promptly all turned and left the town.

------------------

Nurse Betania was cross.

She was always cross, of course. But especially so today. There were more patients than usual today and it was stressing her out, and stress led to anger.

"Hey! You! No rocking the stretchers!"

"But I need to move my leg!" said a Buizel.

"You can move it when it's healed! Now stop squirming!"

The Buizel sighed and flopped back into bed. Betania sighed and resumed her paperwork.

It was then she heard another voice. Or rather a pair of voices.

"Well this is quite a pickle, isn't it?'

"Well things would be different if you hadn't botched it."

Betania looked over to see two familiar Metang. They were looking at an odd lump of clay.

"Maybe if we knead it a bit more..."

"No, no, it's already botched. You ruined it."

Betania's frown intensified. "Hey you two! Ferrite! Pearlite! What are you even doing?"

The two Metang froze. Then slowly turned to Betania.

"We're trying to learn how to sculpt!" said Pearlite.

"We were trying to make Guildmaster Stoakes..." said Ferrite.

Betania looked at the misshapen lump of clay. Then back at the two Metang. Then back and forth between the two repeatedly until she finally groaned and shook her head.

"Why don't you two do something USEFUL and help me with these patients?"

"We don't have much medical expertise..." said Pearlite.

"Make that none," said Ferrite.

"You can still help! Sort medicine, clean cots... that kind of thing! Get to work!"

The two Metang paused. Then they got about doing as she said. Sorting bottles, cleaning cots, sanitizing instruments... the works. Eventually however they turned to Betania, frustrated.

"Just why are there so many patients to clean up after anyway?" said Pearlite.

"You wouldn't think there'd be this many..." said Ferrite.

Betania sighed. "There have been... a lot of attacks by the Quiver Empire, as of late."

"...Oh," said Ferrite.

"That explains a lot," said Pearlite.

"Yes," said Betania. "They've been coming here in droves every time there's an attack. It's exhausting in multiple senses."

"I can see that..." said Ferrite.

"It's definitely... a lot," said Pearlite.

"I know..." said Betania. "I just want the Quiver Empire to go away."

"Why did it have to be us and not them?" said Pearlite.

"You know full well why," said Ferrite.

Betania gave them a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

The two Metang looked back at each other. Then back to Betania.

"Don't you remember?" said Pearlite.

"We are... survivors of the Alakagross civilization," said Pearlite.

"Betania blinked. "Oh. Oh right. You guys went through a lot."

"Most certainly..." said Ferrite."The Legendaries struck us down so long ago for trying to fire off a great weapon... and yet it all seems fresh."

"We... I still don't trust them after that," said Pearlite. "Even Ho-Oh."

"I can't say I don't see why..." said Betania.

"But a bigger problem is that Nyra!" said Pearlite. "The head of the Quiver Empire's got to go!"

"Yes, she is of much more concern at the moment..." said Ferrite.

"Yeah... I hope some way, somehow, this will all be over."

"One can only hope," said Ferrite.

"We just gotta," said Pearlite.

"Yeah hopefully this resolves for better...," said Betania.

"Agreed," said Ferrite.

"Wait... where were we?" said Pearlite.

"Oh right! You were working for me!" said Betania. "Get back to work!"

The two Metang meeped and got back to work.

-----------------

Nyra was, as usual, sitting on her throne. She tapped her wingtip on the armrest impatiently.

Suddenly, there was a noise. The door opened. Mullein came in, followed by a familiar Flapple, who was looking very nervous.

" Empress? The lieutenant wants to speak with you."

"'Wants' is a bit of a stretch..." said Lieutenant Grimhilde.

"Quiet," said Nyra. "What is this about? The reconnaissance I sent you on?"

"Er. Um. About that..."

"Spit it out. I don't have the patience for you dilly-dallying."

Lieutenant Grimhilde gulped. "Well good news. I found the Noibat you were looking for!"

"I assume there is bad news I am not going to like hearing," said Nyra icily.

Grimhilde stammered. "The bad news... the Noibat got away. He had others with him, and one was a Zorua, and-"

"You IDIOT!" said Nyra. "I gave you one job! One job! And you blew it! You are a disgrace to the Empire!"

"Sorry ma'am. Won't happen again ma'am."

"It BETTER not. You'll need to do some real work to make this up... how about... scrubbing the dungeons. I'm sure the inmates would LOVE to see you."

Grimhilde gulped. "Yes ma'am. Right away ma'am."

She slinked off. Mullein turned to Nyra.

"Harsh as ever, are we?"

"I need to be. If this Noibat is who I think he is.... He can't get to the meteor."

----------

Stella and Sir Quackmire were making their way down a path. Sir Quackmire was humming to himself cheerfully. Stella was looking around warily.

Suddenly, Stella noticed something. Her eyes narrowed.

"Quackmire? We're being followed."

Sir Quackmire's expression steeled. He brandished his leek.

"Well then. Come what may. We can take them."

Stella nodded, then raised her fists.

"Come on out. We know you're there."

There was silence. Then a voice.

"I TOLD you this was a bad idea!"

Three Pokemon popped out of the bushes. They were a Charmeleon, Eevee, and Pachirisu. And they all looked rather disgruntled.

"It was worth a shot!" said the Pachirisu.

"I told you we should have stuck to scamming them first!" said the Eevee. "We'd have the edge!"

"Easy there." said the Charmeleon. " We can take these guys. Probably."

"Are you sure?" said the Eevee.

"They don't look that tou-" the Pachirisu started to say.

He was summarily whacked upside the head. Then the Eevee. Then the Charmeleon. The three of them collapsed where they stood.

--------------

When they came to, they saw Stella and Sir Quackmire looming over them. They quickly panicked. (Suggestion: Something a bit more descriptive here, like They scrambled backwards in terror, the eevee’s fur stood on end, etc)

"Please! We'll do anything! Anything!" said the Charmeleon.

"We'll clean floors! Do dishes! Bus tables!" said the Eevee.

“I'm not sure about busing tab-" the Pachirisu started to say.

"Shut up!" said the Charmeleon. "You want to die?"

Stella rolled her eyes. "We aren't going to kill you. We just want to know some things."

"Like what?" said the Eevee. "Our birthdays?"

"Nope," said Sir Quackmire. "More like.... do you know anything about a meteor, lads?"

"The meteor?" said the Pachirisu. "You mean the one that crashed during the Seeking? No idea."

"I heard Empress Nyra is very interested in it for... some reason," said the Eevee. "But that's about it."

Stella and Sir Quackmire's faces both grew grave.

"Empress Nyra?" said Sir Quackmire. "That's not a good sign. Anything with her means trouble. But what could it be...?"

Stella winced.

"...Whatever it is, we have to stop it. Sir, we have to keep going. As for these... miscreants, we should figure out what to do with them.”

The three balked.

"Miscreants?" said the Eevee. "How dare you!"

"We're more ruffians than anything," said the Charmeleon. "Sounds more charismatic. Dashing. Sexy."

"I understand none of those words," said the Pachirisu.

Stella rolled her eyes. "Whatever you want to call yourselves. We can't let mons like you loose."

Sir Quackmire thought a bit. Then smirked as much as his beak would allow.

"What if... they came with us? As, you know... "assistants.""

"Wait wait wait wait," said the Charmeleon. "We won't take this lying down!"

"But we were lying down a second ago," said the Pachirisu.

"Whatever!" said the Eevee. “We aren't doing this! It's uncouth!"

"It's either that or we turn you into the Guild,"said Stella. "Your choice."

The three gulped.

"W-We'll take it, " said the Charmeleon.

"I'm Susan, the Charmeleon is Lumine, and the Pachirisu is Chad," said the Eevee. "P-Pleasure to work with you."

"Please don't turn us in," said Chad. "We're delicate. We've been through too much."

Sir Quackmire chuckled. "I suppose that's a deal then. Welcome aboard."

"We should get going then," said Stella. "The meteor's waiting."

But it won't be waiting much longer, she thought.

***
 
Top Bottom