lisianthus
『教えてよ、まだ知らかい話』
This one-shot was originally posted on the Bulbagarden Forums, and will be cross-posted to AO3 soon!
Note: to get the most enjoyment out of this work, you'll probably want to know the base plot of Haikyuu! If you're unfamilliar, it essentially follows the journey of a Japanese high school volleyball club with two extraordinary freshmen players and their journey to... being the best high school team in Japan. So hopefully that'll make sense? There's not a lot of volleyball in here in the end, though~.
Rated Teen for some strong language here and there, as well as mild-moderate suggestive themes. A character makes references to dying a few times, but it's all but once in the metaphorical sense, always the product of anxiety, and no actual death occurs within the story. 8,584 words in this one-shot!
Thanks to Welkamo on the Bulbagarden Forums for betaing! He didn't know the series itself, but still was able to provide some valuable input~.
Constructive criticism of any kind is very welcome!
With that, please enjoy~!!
...Never thought I was going to be posting something in the non-Pokemon section, LOL! But sometimes, life has different plans for you.
I wrote this story over the course of around five or so months, but I'm hoping that it doesn't feel too fragmented! It gradually took a few turns in my planning process here and there, but I think it's for the best it happened so slowly! It allowed me to fix things and not feel rushed when writing, which I hope will pay off! Lately I've been mostly writing for the AU I share with my very very dear Subway Master of an older sister♡, so this is a good change of pace! Her and I will eventually probably share all we've created someday, but I still would like to be able to properly show my writing off to everyone, not just her, you know?
It's been like... technically, four or more years since I've written a Haikyuu fic? I don't really consider anything from maybe two~three years before onwards as 'me' for a variety of reasons, but for this purpose I guess I can count it, ehehe. That one is long deleted, but it was a romance fic (F / M) also featuring Hitoka, buuuut it wasn't very good LOL. The best piece of writing from my middle school days, yes, but still not very good nonetheless? I can be confident in my progress, I guess... I also feel like things are feel much more 'natural' in this one, maybe because I'm much more in tune with how Hitoka is as a person??? I've become like her as I've grown LOL... well, I hope that you'll enjoy her and Shimizu-senpai and Koushi, please!
I wrote this story over the course of around five or so months, but I'm hoping that it doesn't feel too fragmented! It gradually took a few turns in my planning process here and there, but I think it's for the best it happened so slowly! It allowed me to fix things and not feel rushed when writing, which I hope will pay off! Lately I've been mostly writing for the AU I share with my very very dear Subway Master of an older sister♡, so this is a good change of pace! Her and I will eventually probably share all we've created someday, but I still would like to be able to properly show my writing off to everyone, not just her, you know?
It's been like... technically, four or more years since I've written a Haikyuu fic? I don't really consider anything from maybe two~three years before onwards as 'me' for a variety of reasons, but for this purpose I guess I can count it, ehehe. That one is long deleted, but it was a romance fic (F / M) also featuring Hitoka, buuuut it wasn't very good LOL. The best piece of writing from my middle school days, yes, but still not very good nonetheless? I can be confident in my progress, I guess... I also feel like things are feel much more 'natural' in this one, maybe because I'm much more in tune with how Hitoka is as a person??? I've become like her as I've grown LOL... well, I hope that you'll enjoy her and Shimizu-senpai and Koushi, please!
Note: to get the most enjoyment out of this work, you'll probably want to know the base plot of Haikyuu! If you're unfamilliar, it essentially follows the journey of a Japanese high school volleyball club with two extraordinary freshmen players and their journey to... being the best high school team in Japan. So hopefully that'll make sense? There's not a lot of volleyball in here in the end, though~.
I'm somehow getting back into my Haikyuu fangirl middle school days, mainly because while I was having some not good times earlier this year, I just had a sudden urge to write for this specific character, Hitoka Yachi. Hitoka has loooong been my favorite character of the series, and I've always though we're really similar, so I'll hope I'm somehow not projecting too much with my characterization of her! I really think... well, you'll see, ehehe.
This fic takes place when the normal Haikyuu events do, specifically from around October 2012 to December 2012. I haven't properly followed the series in more than four or so years, likely, so please forgive me if I get any details wrong! I've tried to research as much as I can.
Here's what Hitoka looks like, if you're curious! (Sorry for the fandom wiki link...) And Koushi and Shimizu-senpai. The other characters you can also find on that wiki, if you're curious!
As for a word list:
-san is a polite suffix in Japanese language, similar-ish to Mr., Mrs., or Mx. in English.
-kun is like -san, but mainly used on (young) men, or one's inferiors regardless of gender, and is less formal.
-chan is less formal than -san, and is oftentimes used by and for girls and women, but is not neccesarily gendered! Just 'cute'.
-senpai and -kouhai mean 'senior' and 'junior' respectively, but in this case, thinking of them as being analogous to '-san' with the added nuance of referring to one's upper / underclassmen.
~min, ~rin are nickname suffixes commonly used in 'kogyaru' culture, which was (is?) popular with young women in the 2000s! It's easier to do this with Japanese names, so that's why they're staying like this, despite this being written in English. Koushi and Tohru are gay, so they are more than allowed to bestow cute little nicknames on their friend!!
shouganai just means 'it can't be helped', or 'oh well', or to put it much more vulgarly... 'fuck it' LOL. i tend to use it a lot in my daily life, so it's made its way here!
kabedon means something like wall-slap, I guess? It's a common trope in anime and manga, here's a better explanation because I'm a bit tired and would like to actually work on another writing project I have right now. kadon is just an onomatopoeia that sounds similar?
Please let me know if there's anything I'm forgetting! There's some Japanese here and there in here I'm sure I'm forgetting to explain, so. I'm using some Japanese here and there because it is a story that takes place within Japan and because Japanese tends to invade my brain enough to throw in words for whimsy (LOL), annnd that's just about it! So if using honorific suffices and other JP language stuff feels weird in this story... my bad T_T.
Blurb:
This fic takes place when the normal Haikyuu events do, specifically from around October 2012 to December 2012. I haven't properly followed the series in more than four or so years, likely, so please forgive me if I get any details wrong! I've tried to research as much as I can.
Here's what Hitoka looks like, if you're curious! (Sorry for the fandom wiki link...) And Koushi and Shimizu-senpai. The other characters you can also find on that wiki, if you're curious!
As for a word list:
-san is a polite suffix in Japanese language, similar-ish to Mr., Mrs., or Mx. in English.
-kun is like -san, but mainly used on (young) men, or one's inferiors regardless of gender, and is less formal.
-chan is less formal than -san, and is oftentimes used by and for girls and women, but is not neccesarily gendered! Just 'cute'.
-senpai and -kouhai mean 'senior' and 'junior' respectively, but in this case, thinking of them as being analogous to '-san' with the added nuance of referring to one's upper / underclassmen.
~min, ~rin are nickname suffixes commonly used in 'kogyaru' culture, which was (is?) popular with young women in the 2000s! It's easier to do this with Japanese names, so that's why they're staying like this, despite this being written in English. Koushi and Tohru are gay, so they are more than allowed to bestow cute little nicknames on their friend!!
shouganai just means 'it can't be helped', or 'oh well', or to put it much more vulgarly... 'fuck it' LOL. i tend to use it a lot in my daily life, so it's made its way here!
kabedon means something like wall-slap, I guess? It's a common trope in anime and manga, here's a better explanation because I'm a bit tired and would like to actually work on another writing project I have right now. kadon is just an onomatopoeia that sounds similar?
Please let me know if there's anything I'm forgetting! There's some Japanese here and there in here I'm sure I'm forgetting to explain, so. I'm using some Japanese here and there because it is a story that takes place within Japan and because Japanese tends to invade my brain enough to throw in words for whimsy (LOL), annnd that's just about it! So if using honorific suffices and other JP language stuff feels weird in this story... my bad T_T.
Blurb:
[Haikyuu!! Yuri / F/F romance oneshot]
Hitoka Yachi is dealing with her totally-not-real obsession with her pretty smart, pretty cool, and pretty pretty senpai in the third-year boys' volleyball club manager, Kiyoko Shimizu! As the first-year assistant manager of the club, she's been able to work with Shimizu-senpai very closely, and is still in slight denial of her feelings. What's even worse is that Shimizu-senpai seems to be the object of attention of every guy (and girl!) at school!
But with her best friend (third-year setter Koushi Sugawara) cheering her on and devising numerous schemes to get the two girls together, will things work out?? Or will Hitoka get triple blocked despite her best efforts!? Find out by reading this one-shot, duh!!
Rated Teen for strong language and mild suggestive themes.
Hitoka Yachi is dealing with her totally-not-real obsession with her pretty smart, pretty cool, and pretty pretty senpai in the third-year boys' volleyball club manager, Kiyoko Shimizu! As the first-year assistant manager of the club, she's been able to work with Shimizu-senpai very closely, and is still in slight denial of her feelings. What's even worse is that Shimizu-senpai seems to be the object of attention of every guy (and girl!) at school!
But with her best friend (third-year setter Koushi Sugawara) cheering her on and devising numerous schemes to get the two girls together, will things work out?? Or will Hitoka get triple blocked despite her best efforts!? Find out by reading this one-shot, duh!!
Rated Teen for strong language and mild suggestive themes.
Rated Teen for some strong language here and there, as well as mild-moderate suggestive themes. A character makes references to dying a few times, but it's all but once in the metaphorical sense, always the product of anxiety, and no actual death occurs within the story. 8,584 words in this one-shot!
Thanks to Welkamo on the Bulbagarden Forums for betaing! He didn't know the series itself, but still was able to provide some valuable input~.
Constructive criticism of any kind is very welcome!
With that, please enjoy~!!
Obsessed?
No, she couldn’t be obsessed.
Sure, from the too-many times she discussed it with Shouyo-kun, the way she felt was different from how he was with Tobio-kun. She was more than fine with that, happy, even. They’re boys, she reasoned. What could be more natural than a spirited, passionate, heavy, sensual relat-
Hitoka had to pause juuust for a minute to clear out the fujoshi-colored cobwebs from her mind right then — her good friends were cute together, and she was oftentimes dragged out to be a mediator between them, but whatever they did together was none of her business.
Pit, pat, she slapped her cheeks twice to will herself into getting a grip. Clear your mind. Do it. doitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoit-
Starting from the top —
Hitoka Yachi couldn’t be obsessed, at all!
That was impossible. She had no time for romance, no time for relationships that weren’t friendships, because she was a very busy student, manager, and friend! She spent all of her past Saturday teaching Shouyo-kun how to fold origami crows — ‘for some lame art project’, as he put it, only to immediately change his tune once she suggested something remotely related to volleyball — and used her Sunday to do meal prep and study at the same time. (Note to self: don’t accidentally place flashcards in, on, or near a donabe hot pot EVER again.)
Oh, and she had another phone call with Tobio-kun about preparing for a test on Wednesday for his history class last Friday night… and a few texts from Koushi-senpai from last Thursday(!!) she still hadn’t replied to yet, or even looked at! Were the rumors about him dating Oikawa-san true? Or was it something else? He was going to hate her for being so slow to respond for sure, whatever it was…
Someone like that, she attempted to rationalize, had zero time to think about anything that wasn’t related to staying alive, studying, art, and friends, in that order. Or was ‘friends’ above ‘art’??
But.
Hitoka’s mind was always racing, racing, racing, with worries and fear. Some would say she didn’t have a relaxed bone in her body, which would indubitably make her want to get an MRI to see if she had osteoporosis or not.
Wait, no, osteoporosis is weakened bones, tremors (mini-seizures?) (mini-strokes??) cause shaking, right? Or is it RLS, restless leg syndrome? Or am I having an anxiety attack? Or a panic attack? Should I get an MRI? Do you even diagnose osteoporosis with MRIs? Wait, why would I be having a panic attack now, it’s 1 AM! Ohh…….
So maybe, just maybe, it was a completely normal thing that asmall big chunk of Hitoka’s thoughts at any given free moment were focused on the person she absolutely, positively, definitely had ZERO time for for a variety of reasons, the biggest being that the person in question certainly didn’t see anything in her whatsoever.
Hitoka was more than fine with being Villager B, after all, because it kept her protected from scary situations, like having a pretty upperclasswoman (who was coincidentally her ideal body type in a partner, which Hitoka didn’t even know she had!!) visit her in class to talk.
She always became so surprised when anyone noticed her, so having someone who was not only an upperclasswoman but also drop-dead gorgeous take her by the hand like it was nothing and ask her to join some club as the manager?
She agreed right on the spot, how could she not? Of course, she was so mesmerized that she would have probably said ‘yes’ to anything, which she knew was a dangerous state to be in, but since coming out of her shell just a little, Hitoka never regretted her choice. And it was all thanks to her…
Okay.
Maybe Hitoka was a liiiittttle obsessed. Not a lot, though! Just a totally, completely, average amount of feelings for a girl to feel about her upperclasswoman. Right?
…Right?
～✧～
'I’m a mess, Sugawara-senpai…’
Hitoka slammed her half-finished strawberry milk carton down, defeatedly burying her forehead into her arms laid out onto the the desk in front of her. Behind her was one sympathetic-looking-as-always Sugawara Koushi, who was sitting hunched-over on the foot of her bed.
‘Don’t say things like that about yourself, Hitomin! Missing a few texts here and there is nothing to worry about. You’re a busy girl, I get it. I’ve been a busy gal sometimes, too. It happens!’
‘Thanks, Sugawara-senpai…’ Hitoka listlessly muttered, genuinely grateful for the reassuring advice but completely unable to show it.
‘…That’s not it, is it.’
Sugawara-senpai was perceptive as always.
He was the one upperclassman Hitoka actually spent meaningful time with outside of volleyball and school (because he was very easy to talk to and pretty and good at cooking and pretty), so his regularly-keen perception was stronger with her.
Hitoka nodded in confirmation ever-so-slightly, turning her head to take a peek at Sugawara-senpai’s expression… it was a rare sight, seeing him so deep in thought. Everything about relationships and people seemed to come so naturally to him, which she couldn’t relate to whatsoever.
‘What’s on your mind? We both know something’s bothering you, so saying it might make you feel better, you know.’
‘Are you dating Oikawa from Aoba Johsai, Sugawara-senpai?’
He momentarily choked on the melon bread he had bought on the way home with Hitoka, clearly not seeming to expect a stunner of a question like that.
‘I-that was not the thing that was on your mind, there’s no way. Also, we’re not at school, just call me Koushi!’
‘But… but, it feels so awkward calling someone their first name when they’re a senpai, even though you’re you… you know I’m bad at yobisute.’
‘I bought you your strawberry milk, so in return, just call me Koushi. It’s a done deal. We’ve been friends for soooo long now, you know.’
But five months is nothing when measured against the age of the Earth... him and I are still in the dinosaur ages, if anything…
‘Sugawara-senpai,’ Sugawara audibly groaned upon hearing his efforts fail—‘are you dating Oikawa-san from Aoba Johsai?’
Sugawara took a deep breath. ‘Now wheeeeere did you hear that rumor, young lady?’
‘From Shimizu-senpai.’
‘Figures. Does she seriously go around telling our secrets to everyone on the team? Grr.’
‘No, just me.’
‘…What else does she know?’
‘About Yui-senpai from the girls’ team and Sawamura-senpai…’
‘Everyone knows that, girlie.’
‘Uh… Yamaguchi-kun had a crush on me when I first joined the team as a manager…’
‘Oh? So that’s what’s been bothering you lately, huh?!’
…No??
‘…Wait, I forgot, you’re not into guys. Sorry, sorry!’ Sugawara put his hands a defensive posture, instantly seeming to inwardly kick himself for the slip-up.
Hitoka sighed despondently. She was no stranger to feeling unsure of herself, after all, but matters of love were all-too foreign to her.
‘…Is it a girl I know?’
‘I-it is…’
‘Is it someone on the boys’ volleyball team?’
‘Yes.’
Wait, there’s only one other girl on the team, and it’s her, why did I say that, how did he get it out of me oh no oh no oh noooo…
‘Well, that only leaves one person, then! My dear Hitomin, you have something in common with some of the boys on the team, don’t you now?’
‘…’
Hitoka simply gave a quizzical look to Sugawara, as if to say that her feelings were most certainly not the same kind of lust(?) the boys had for their older manager.
‘Soooo,’ Sugawara seemed to decide to backtrack, ‘how did that happen? I’ve had my suspicions for a while, but didn’t want to press you about it, of course. Gaydar and all that.’
‘…She’s pretty…’
‘You’ve said that about me and Tohru, too, though, and you’re not like this over us. That’s really it?’
‘Existing with people is… hard. I never had anyone to talk to outside of school, and nobody really noticed me, either. I was just an average Villager B. Still am… But, she chose me to be the team’s new manager. I was so scared, having such a popular and pretty upperclasswoman ask to talk to me outside of class, my legs were shaking for the rest of the day…’
‘So you decided you were in love-‘
A small ‘Eep!’ escaped Hitoka’s lips — she was not feeling ready to have such a frank discussion about her feelings!
‘In love with Kiyoko-san from the moment she noticed you?’
‘Maybe just shocked… the l-love came later…’
'Hmm… how do you think she feels about you?’
Hitoka thought the answer to this was obvious. So, she rehearsed the same words she had ran through her mind over and over again thinking about this very topic,
‘She just sees me as her apprentice kouhai, nothing more. And… that’s okay.’ she added that last part almost like a manifestation to make it true.
‘Is it really okay? You sure don’t seem okay, Hitoka…’ Sugawara never uses my first name in full unless if he’s was worried about me, which means I’m in for an earful, oh no… he’ll definitely hate me now.
‘I don’t know if Kiyoko-san feels the same way, but I do know you’re never going to feel better until you do something about it.’
He patted Hitoka on the head, undoubtedly the only person she would accept that behavior from. ‘Look at me, okay, Hitomin?’
Hitoka made a point to look anywhere Sugawara wasn’t at the moment. Normally she wouldn’t be as non-compliant, but she was being dragged through this conversation by her best friend’s sheer willpower despite truly not wanting to take part.
‘Hitomiiiiin…’
Hitoka started to feel a little bad… but then she hoped if she kept at it long enough, he would drop it.
‘Hey…’
Hitoka’s head slooooowly started to turn, gracefully maneuvered by Sugawara’s dainty fingers. Her expression was undoubtedly one of pure defeat.
‘Good. Now you’re looking at me!’ He cupped her cheeks in his hands, yet another move only she would (begrudgingly, this time) accept from him.
‘We’re going to make a plan for this! I don’t like seeing you so listless, Hitomin! So until you’re feeling better, this is my priority number one, got it?’ Sugawara smiled, his eyes warm and kind.
Shouganai.
‘…Got it…’
‘There you go! We’re already on our way to having Kiyoko-san madly fall in love with you, Hitomin!’
‘I-IN LOVE?’ Hitoka could barely stammer a repetition of his words out, which resulted in her saying them at a much higher volume than she had intended to.
‘Mhm! I’ll ask Tohru what he thinks, too… and maybe Daichi, then?’ Sugawara probed.
‘Daichi-senpai has known Shimizu-senpai for a long time, right?’
‘Yep! They’re childhood friends, so he knows her very well. I don’t know if he can help, but I’ll try anything for you, Hitomin!’
‘Thank you… Okay… I can’t believe this, you really think this is a g-good idea, Sugawara-senpai?’
‘Koushi.’
‘Koushi…san…?’
‘Ko-u-shi.’
‘What if she h-hates me, Koushi? I already worry about you hating me, Shouyo-kun and Tobio-kun hating me, my mother hating me, and even my teachers hating me! I don’t want this to go wrong…’ Hitoka hung her head in shame, her face burning with worry.
‘You really think Kiyoko-san already doesn’t get tens of love confessions every week, Hitomin? Even other girls do it. If things don’t go well, I’m sure she’ll forget in a few weeks, but if they do go well… you’ll have yourself a girlfriend, won’t you?’ Sugawara was beaming with pride at what he seemed to think was an unstoppable plan.
‘You think too positively, Koushi-senpai…’ Hitoka mumbled.
‘And you,’ he lightly booped her nose, ‘think you’re never going to have good things happen to you. They will. Just wait and see.’
～✧～
Sigh…
Am I really doing this?
Hitoka was standing outside of one of the third-year classrooms (Shimizu-senpai’s clasroom, actually, not Koushi’s) under the false pretense of eating lunch with Koushi, feeling like a fool for even considering knocking on the currently shut door.
Like she’d be intruding just because she was a kouhai…
Her real aim was to have lunch with Shimizu-senpai, in a plan fully devised by Koushi — he called it ‘foolproof’, but Hitoka was very unsure it would pan out like how he thought it would.
After all… something like this, where he’d suddenly pretend to have stomach sickness, then just rush out to leave her alone with her crush… she would see right through that, right? Shimizu-senpai wasn’t dumb, after all…
But perhaps it wasn’t the time to be worrying so much. After all, she had promised Koushi she’d try her best to follow his plan… but it was so nerve-wracking to think about!
The door shook, momentarily stunning Hitoka right in her tracks… thusly making her unable to escape from the sight of those in the classroom in time as the door swung open, barely shielded by a girl walking out of the classroom and her (probably?) boyfriend.
‘Oh, Hitomin! There you are, come in, come in!’ Koushi called in his usual completely carefree manner, not seeming to belie any hint of an ulterior motive at all.
Hitoka was shaking — oh god I’m really in it now aren’t I do I really have to do this why can’t I just have a heart attack right now and die or at least faint so I can go to the sick bay and not have to do this it’s gonna be so awkward and I won’t be able to-
‘Hitomin! Do I need to drag you in myself!?’ Koushi laughed just a little — she abruptly realized was making a fool of herself the longer she stayed paralyzed in the doorway, so with a ‘sorry for the wait!’, she forced herself towards the back left of the classroom, where he sat desks-pushed-together with Shimizu-senpai, not before giving a quick bow to the both.
She was as pretty as always…
‘Sugawara-kun was telling me he invited you to eat with us… it’s nice to see you outside of club activities, Yachi-chan.’
-Chan!??
Shimizu-senpai’s casual, really meaningless usage of the familiar suffix always tended to fluster Hitoka, even though she really meant nothing behind it other than casual friendship — or so Hitoka assumed, anyways.
‘H-hi, uh, I mean, hello, Shimizu-senpai! It’s nice to see you too, Kou-, uh, Sugawara-senpai invited me, so I decided to stop b-by. Yeah.’
Nailed it…
Koushi gave Hitoka a despondent look that seemed to say something like, ‘That’s really the best you could do?’, but quickly seemed to decide that it wouldn’t help and stopped.
‘That’s right!! Hitomin is a good friend of mine, after all, so she’s always welcome to hang with us.’
‘Hmm… I see. Who do you usually spend lunch with, Yachi-chan?’
I’m going to look so lame.
‘Oh, I usually spend lunch by myself… but it’s only because- ‘cause I’m studying! Not because I’m alone or anything, ahaha, haha.. I just like to study.’
‘R-right! It’s a real problem sometimes when I text her and she doesn’t respond because she’s up all night studying, isn’t that right, Hitomin? For realsies, haha..’
This looks so conspicuous.
‘Well… attending to your studies is important, Yachi-chan,’ Shimizu-senpai started off, ‘but make sure that you’re getting rest, too. You won’t do well as a manager if you’re too tired to help out, right?’ she gently insisted.
Hitoka nodded frantically — probably much too enthusiastically for what amounted to a nonchalant polite tip from her senpai, and (certainly very conspicuously) glanced over at Koushi to see how she was doing.
Koushi did not meet her eyes.
‘Um, you’re right, Shimizu-sen—‘
‘Sick bay. Stomach. Sorrrrry!!’ Koushi ran his escape route, managing to bang his thigh on a desk, knocking it over, cursing, then dashing out the door.
…Flawless.
‘Uh, i-is he okay? Should we go and check, on, him…?’ Hitoka wasn’t prepared for the suddenness of Koushi’s outburst despite knowing it would happen, so she tried to put her best to put on a believable worried face.
‘I think he’ll be fine, though we won’t be seeing him at practice, won’t we.’
‘N-nope, I don’t think so!’ Hitoka nervously laughed — she had no idea how to act one on one with Shimizu-senpai!
While Hitoka thought what to say next, Shimizu-senpai seemed to take to studying her almost certainly worried… or flustered, rather, expression. It only served to scramble Hitoka’s brain even more — having her crush! look at her for such an extended period of time was scary!
‘You look so nervous, Yachi-chan… I see how you are with Koushi-kun during practices, I know you’re not afraid of all of your senpai, are you? Are you so friendly with him because…?’
Shimizu-senpai was clearly inquiring about Hitoka liking Koushi, which was emphatically not the case.
‘Oh, uh, no, he’s just a very good friend to me! Almost like, uhm, a big brother or a childhood friend, and besides…’
Shimizu-senpai lifted her eyebrows, seemingly very curious on what detail Hitoka trailed off on.
‘Besides?’
‘Um, I don’t, really s-swing that way, so even if it looks like we’re friendly…’
Shimizu-senpai reddened, just a little, clearly surprised at the sudden slip of the tongue by her kouhai, who was continuously reddening in realization of her huge mistake.
‘Oh my god, um, that wasn’t- I didn’t mean to- that’s not really what—‘
She was silenced by Shimizu-senpai putting a palm over her tighly clenched left hand, sitting on the desk in abject horror.
I. Wh-what? What? She’s. Why is Shimizu-senpai touching my hand??? Is she trying to drain my lifeforce away?? Her hand’s really soft, oh my god…
‘I understand, Yachi-chan — you’re very brave to tell me. I won’t judge you or think differently of you, after all, I…’
Huh? Is she… also…?
‘You… Shimizu-senpai…?’
‘Hm? Oh, forget I said anything, Yachi-chan.’
Just like that, the moment seemed like it was over — Shimizu-senpai’s hand off of Hitoka’s, but with Hitoka still looking unignorably beet-red.
‘Is there anyone you’re as close to as Koushi-kun?’
‘Uh…’
‘Well, there is someone I’d like to be close to, but… I don’t know if, if she feels… if she wants to, uh, hang out. And talk, and, stuff.’
What am I doing!??
Shimizu-senpai simply giggled softly for reasons that were unknowable to Hitoka.
‘Well… if there’s any advice I can give you, it’ll have to wait until practice is over, hmm?’
Hitoka hummed softly, looking at the clock — Shimizu-senpai was implicitly sending her off, as there was only a minute or two before the lunch period was over.
‘R-right! Thank you, Shimizu-senpai… I—I’ll go check on Kous-uh, Sugawara-senpai now!! Bye!’
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god-
～✧～
Koushi was not, in fact, at practice — much to Hitoka’s surprise.
He was, however, waiting at her apartment — thankfully not inside, but loitering right outside the door, looking probably very suspicious to anyone who saw him.
What would the neighbors think…
‘Koushi?’
‘My dearest Hitomin…?’
‘Were you actually sick? You weren’t at practice… I feel bad about asking, but you should go home if you are, I don’t want to catch anything from you.’
‘Oh, I just wanted to get off early so I could go to Shimada Mart. Aaaaand see a movie.’
‘You saw a movie instead of diligently studying for your exams??’
‘I abso-lutely did!’
And you’d think he’d be the mature one as my senpai…
‘So, about Shimizu-senpai…’
‘Tell me everything. Gimme the deets. Spill the tea.’
‘T-tea!? There’s- there’s tea spilt? On the ground? I think that’s just from when it rained in the morning, senpai…’
Koushi mock-facepalmed with clear dramatic intent.
‘No, silly, it’s an express- you know what, forget it, can we go inside so I can make some tea while you spill it?’
Hitoka wore that same frantic look she did ten seconds prior.
‘Metaphorically?’ he tried again.
‘Sure! You know your way around this apartment better than I do, so you know where everything is…’ she fiddled with her keys, successfully unlocking the door on her fourth try.
—
‘So, the movie I saw…’ Koushi was busying himself with heating a pot of water, preparing their usual tea orders — black (a taste acquired from her modern mother, who she had lived with in England throughout middle school) for her, and green (iced) for him.
‘Was it a romance movie?’ Hitoka figured that he would try to tie in part of the plot to her current situation to come up with yet another harebrained scheme.
‘Huh? No, but… why would you think that, Hitomin? Did something good happen today…? Hmm…?’
‘W-well, uhmm…’
The kettle was starting to steam a little.
‘I… she, held my hand- no, not held, but she, touched my hand? On purpose?? I think???’ Hitoka said it almost as if she was still trying to confirm it happened in reality.
‘Held your hand?!’ — he seemed to ignore Hitoka’s clarifications otherwise — ‘Wow, you must have really made an impression, gratz! When’s the wedding? I’m obviously the best man and flower boy, right?’
W-wedding!?? Isn’t that much too presumptuous!?? Best man???
‘We’re not even… dating, or anything… and she didn’t do it because of anything I did, well, I guess I told her I don’t like guys, and—‘
‘You came out to her, and then she held your hand right after, Hitomin!? I have no idea how you found the courage, girl, but you’ve outdone yourself!’ Koushi seemed to have genuine relief written on his face.
‘What are my-‘ — her words were interrupted by the high-pitched whistling of the now-ready kettle — ‘what are my chances now? You seem to think it’s been a big success so far…’
‘Of course it’s been a big success — I was the one who knew this would happen.’ Koushi smugly replied as he poured water over their mugs.
‘But… what do I do now?’
‘Hmm… how about a group date?’
‘Dating two people at once? I… don’t think I’d… like that…?’
Koushi gently mock-bonked his much shorter friend on the head in a manner reminiscent of a certain setter’s classic tsukkomi-style attack on his boyfriend, smiling all the while.
‘No, silly, it’s like… for example, if me and Tohru, or Shouyo and Tobio were to hang out with you and Kiyoko-san. Something for friends who are in relationships to do.’
‘Oh! That sounds fun, but… we’re not in a relationship, so it won’t work, right? Good idea, though…’ Hitoka was feeling uncharacteristically disappointed at her self-convincing about her best friend’s idea not being viable, yet also very happy she wouldn’t need to go out of her comfort zone again.
‘Well,’ — Koushi nimbly removed the teabags from Hitoka’s dangerously-close-to-oversteeping black tea — ‘if it’s just me and Tohru, we can go as friends, right? Tohru and Kiyoko-san have some… history together, but I’m sure he’d put it all aside to help you out. He already knows all about how you’re in love, after all.’
Hitoka was dangerously close to spitting out her scaldingly hot tea as it were, and could only barely choke her sip down before she could respond.
‘You told him!?’
…Did he have any advice?’
‘Honey, of course I’d tell him — we’re boyfriends, and nothing gets unsaid between us, except for our strategies on the court… though I’ve tried to get Bluecastle’s out of him before, hehe. He said that someone as cute as you should have no problem getting her to like you!’
Hitoka blushed a little — she knew that a gay man calling her cute was different from how other guys meant it, but… it still counted as a compliment she virtually never heard, and another thing to smile about.
‘…Maybe actually talking to Oikawa-san will be fun.’
~✧~
‘Ooh…’
Oikawa-san was intently staring at Hitoka like she was a half-finished oil painting, his stylish beret only accentuated the artistic expression he wore. The action only made her a little uncomfortable, somehow, but it was still unnerving enough to make her blush.
‘No. I can’t see it. I just don’t understand what she sees in you, Yacchirin.’
I think he has this backwards!?? It’s me liking Shimizu-senpai…
‘U-uh, maybe that’s because I’m the one who likes—‘
‘Rude, Tohru!! Do you know what your words are implying here??’ Another familiar voice broke out into the fray, though with an all-too unfamiliar harsh tone.
‘Kou-chan, come onnn! I don’t mean it like Yacchirin is unattractive or anything, she’s just so different from Kiyoko! You do see it, right!?’ came his partner’s scoffing reply.
‘Just a few days ago you said I should tell her you said she would have no problem getting with Kiyoko-san, and now this!? Way to kill her confidence, haven’t you been listening all the times I’ve told you about poor Hitomin’s issues with confidence??’
They’re going on like I’m not sitting in front of them… and I’m invisible like always…
…Koushi and Oikawa-san were a lovely couple, both in looks as well as personality, truly — though they got into spats too much for Hitoka’s comfort, she knew they were good for each other.
Hopefully they would be good for her, too.
After all… they had gotten her this far, right?
Waiting in a cafe for Shimizu-senpai to show up for brunch.
On a Sunday morning.
For a group ‘friend date’, whatever that really meant. Hitoka prided herself on her English scores at school, and as such she felt the two words made an oxymoron, but that was the least of her worries.
It was an understatement to say Hitoka was nervous, and Oikawa-san and Koushi’s public discussing of her relationship woes (thankfully without Shimizu-senpai at the table) did not do much of anything to relax her — rather the opposite, really.
‘Like I was saying…’ — she took a momentary break in their bickering to slip in — ‘Uhm, Oikawa…-san, I think you have it a little… mixed up? I’m the one who lov—likes, Shimizu-senpai. And I don’t think she likes me, so…’ Hitoka trailed off.
‘We don’t not know she doesn’t like you, though!’ Koushi cheerfully interjected, seemingly completely unaware his usage of a double negative rendered his compliment null, void, and legally an insult.
But before Hitoka could correct that, a sight momentarily not only took her breath away, but also threatened to increase her already slightly pounding Tylenol-less headache. Shimizu-senpai was rapidly approaching their booth, and she was in street clothes(!!), not in the ubiquitous team jacket or a school uniform, but in her own style.
And she was gorgeous, to say the least, Hitoka thought — she didn’t expect a leather jacket(!!) to fit so well on Shimizu-senpai’s… body(!?), and her cream-colored knit scarf accented her supple(!??) skin in a way that Hitoka could only readily describe as radiant.
To put it in other words, Yachi Hitoka was unabashedly, unmistakably, and unacceptably,
down bad.
She could only pray her thoughts weren’t written on her likely increasingly reddening face. (Stopping it from happening was pure fantasy.)
Oh my god, she just sat next to me. She’s so pretty. I’m going to hyperventilate right here and now. I’m going to die at this cute little cafe and they’re going to shut down because it’ll be the cafe where the girl hyperventilated to death and I’m going to disrupt the economy and I’ll—
‘Hmm?’ Shimizu-senpai curiously peered at Hitoka, who was unknowingly zoned out looking right at her crush.
‘Ahh, it’s, nothing! I’m just… uh, you’re very pr— your scarf is v-very pretty, Shimizu-senpai, and I was looking at you— at it, to see where you… got it…?’
Nailed it.
Shimizu-senpai gave a look that seemed a bit knowing to Koushi, one that Hitoka worried was one of regret — but then she fixed her eyes on Hitoka’s as if nothing was wrong, melting all of the younger girl’s worries away.
‘Oh, this scarf? I actually bought it at the Mitsukoshi department store in Sendai a few years ago, it’s one of my favorites.’
‘I see!’ Hitoka stammered out, trying to keep her cool in the face of… well, the face of her crush.
‘I bet you’d look cute in it, Yacchirin~’ the peanut gallery (Oikawa) cooed from across the table, clearly enjoying Hitoka turning redder and redder all the while.
‘Really? …Well, I don’t know about tha—!?‘ Hitoka’s voice was muffled by Shimizu-senpai suddenly (gently) wrapping the scarf around her neck, the older girl’s fingertips gently brushing against the back of the blonde’s neck, making her slightly shiver despite the newfound warmth of the fabric.
‘You’re right, she really does look cute… right, Kiyoko-san?’ Koushi probed.
‘She does look cute in it. I think it suits Yachi-chan very nicely.’ Shimizu-senpai softly smiled, almost inadvertently threatening to turn Hitoka into goo inside.
If I make it out of this alive. I’m going to thank Koushi and Oikawa-senpai after this. Profusely.
—
Brunch was very eventful.
Hitoka thought the most shocking part of it was when the waitress drew a heart on Oikawa-san’s omurice right in front of Koushi like it was nothing. (Koushi and Oikawa-san were even holding hands, too!)
She had never seen Koushi that irritated before, but it seemed like he completely forgot all about it once Oikawa-san fed him a little… They were adorable together.
Hitoka internally knew her souffle pancakes were very tasty, as expected for such a chic little cafe, but she could hardly focus on the tartness of the bright-red strawberry soufflé topping them! Not over the sight of Shimizu-senpai nibbling at her dark chocolate croissant.
…She was shameless.
Koushi and Oikawa-san were almost certainly aware of just how awkward Hitoka (always) was, yet they somehow were able to keep things running smoothly enough that… the friend date somehow, somehow, didn’t feel like a disaster.
Sure, she had stumbled over her words more than the average person would, and sure, she had very nearly spilled pancake syrup over her cardigan, and sure, she had almost choked on her Earl Grey twice because of her chronic overthinking, but…
Even with some to-be-expected minor faults here and there, she counted her disasterless morning as a huge victory. To think she would have gone from hardly being able to talk to her crush at school, to… still hardly being able to talk to her crush, but on a date(!) was something Hitoka would have never in a million years considered possible, after all.
She needed to make it up to those two sometime, no matter if things worked out with Shimizu-senpai or not. Maybe another brunch, or karaoke, or a theme park, or… well, in the end, she would probably just let Koushi pick instead of her, anyways.
With warm goodbyes exchanged between Shimizu-senpai (it seemed she was busy and couldn’t stay long?) and the others, Hitoka was left with breathing room for the first time in what felt like hours.
Finally.
‘Heyyy, Hitomin~’
Or not.
～✧～
‘You need to confess to her, really soon.’
It was nearly three weeks after the brunch date, and nothing had really come out of it, at least from what Hitoka could see… which she had expected, sure, but it would have been nice to have something change.
But.
Hitoka was taken by surprise by not only the directness of Koushi taking her aside with no warning, but also his clear seriousness — it wasn’t like him to be so forceful with her, so… she figured that he really meant what he said, and had thought about it for a while, too.
‘What? I… do…?’
‘The Spring Tournament is really soon, and… well, not that I don’t think you won’t help us out lots even if you’re still feeling worried, but… it's the national tournament, you know?’ he scratched the back of his head, clearly quite nervous about what he was bringing up.
She knew exactly what he was implying, but had a feeling he would never actually say it. She understood his rationale, especially because it would be his last tournament with the team.
And Shimizu-senpai's, too.
‘For the sake of myself, but also Shimizu-senpai and the team, you want me to put an end to this, one way or another?’
She also knew that Koushi had a point — seven months of being the manager-in-training of the club, with the vast majority of them spent ever-so-slightly internally freaking out over the very woman training her, was… likely not doing the team or herself well. There was no sense in ruining the moment of those she had worked so hard to support, not at all, and... Hitoka couldn't say that she didn't understand, in the end.
Koushi hung his head, looking shameful — even though he was the one imposing on Hitoka, she felt bad for even putting him in the position of asking her to do something about her problem!
‘This isn’t about the team. I’m just worried about you, Hitomin. You don’t need extra stress in your life, especially not when our club is going to be so busy soon, you know?’ He softly placed his left hand on hers.
I guess that makes me feel like a little bit less of a burden. Koushi has already helped me so much with everything, so…
‘I’ll do it.’
A month and a half after Hitoka had turned to Koushi out of something similar to desperation, and…
What had changed, exactly?
She certainly didn’t feel more headstrong, or sure of herself, or ready to confess.
But she had a feeling that she wouldn’t feel any different even if she were to wait — she was the sort of neurotic personality that thrived on taking momentous yet paralyzingly scary steps forward.
Confessing to Shimizu-senpai would simply have to be another step — Villager B could fight too, after all.
—
‘—to Shimizu-senpai?!?’
Chatting with Shouyo-kun was never not a loud affair.
‘Why does everyone I tell get so surprised!?? Do we really not seem like a good enough match? Even considering her liking me was a stupid idea, oh no…’
Hitoka was situated in a (thankfully) mostly-empty first-year classroom with two certain good friends of hers, in the two bona fide freshmen stars of the volleyball club — Right before her were the very spirited (with firey hair color to match) Shouyo Hinata, and the death-stare-equipped Tobio Kageyama.
With about twenty minutes to spare before the day’s first classes, they had plenty of time to discuss her relationship woes.
‘Dumbass.’
Hitoka couldn’t resist letting out a shameful ‘Eep!’ from the black-haired boy’s sharp interjection — she was very worried Tobio-kun was also hoping to pile on the ‘Hitoka is delusional’ train that she always seemed to be riding herself.
If she wasn’t able to justify her feelings towards Shimizu-senpai to Shouyo-kun, she was done for if Mister All-Japan Youth Volleyball Team Training Camp Invitee(!!) Kageyama Tobio himself was going in for the kill!
‘Shouyo.’
Tobio-kun’s voice was as icy as ever — Hitoka would hate to be on the receiving end of any of his near-constant harsh comments… or his sets, for that matter.
‘Look at her. Hitoka doesn’t look too confident right now, huh?’
I’m right here, you know…
‘Well? She doesn’t, does she, right? Answer me, shrimp.’
Well, at least he’s not annoyed at me??
‘Y-Yes, sir!!’
Sir??????????
‘So? How ‘bout you do something about it??’
‘You can talk to her too, Mister-I-Forgot-How-To-Smile-Today!’
‘What was that!??’
Still here…
Their bickering was comical as always — Hitoka was sure that to most onlookers, Shouyo-kun and Tobio-kun were not any semblance of a picture-perfect couple by any means, but having known the two for long enough, she knew they were somehow stronger for all their fighting.
She could only pray that wouldn’t be her dynamic with Shimizu-senpai, if they got together.
—
‘Hitoka, you really think you’re ready to confess to Shimizu-senpai?’
Shouyo-kun was direct as always — it was a quality Hitoka completely lacked, and thusly muchly admired in him.
‘…No…’
Hitoka had to speak her mind and be honest, especially when important matters were concerned! She had been getting better at it lately, after all…
‘Well, the two of us can change that! Pretend I’m Shimizu-senpai, confess to me! And Tobio thought this up, so he’ll try not to be too rude about your results!’
She always seemed to find herself in the strangest of situations, always seemingly at the behest of (oddly enough) the only high school-age gay couples she knew of.
Birds of feather, or however that saying went.
‘Alright… umm, Shi…mizu, -senpai…’
God, this is so awkward!!
‘I like you. Please go out with me… or don’t if you don’t want to it’s really fine honestly and I don’t mean to force you to answer or worse actually consider me or impose on you or—‘
‘Complete and utter failure!’
What!????
Hitoka thought this situation was similar to what she imagined it would feel like to get told off by her mother for failing an English test. At least that would never happen…
‘Tobio!! Be nice!’
‘You’d really lie to her and say she doesn’t need a fuck-ton of help?’
‘I don’t want to call our good friend hopeless,’ (HOPELESS??)—‘Kusoyama, especially not when she’s so serious about this. What is wrong with—‘
‘Hopeless…?’ she tried to emulate the sharpness of Tobio-kun’s tone without making her voice waver, almost certainly completely failing.
The two froze in their tracks — it was unlike Hitoka to interject through a fight of theirs, much less… appear genuinely frustrated.
‘I’m trying. I really, really am. And it’s really, really hard for me, and I need you two to remember that. Shouyo-kun, you helped me to grow into myself so much this last June. I’m still finding my wings. Please, please… understand how new everything is to me. I could barely even talk to people in my own year without feeling like I’d die, and now I’m… doing this. Or at least, trying to. It’s scary, so please, just…’
She wasn’t sure what point her words were making, and it felt as though she was simply speaking without knowing what word would come next.
But she soldiered on, anyways.
‘And Tobio-kun… can I ask something?’
The black-haired boy simply nodded.
‘How did you confess to Shouyo-kun? I’d like to take notes, if that’s… not weird…’
She held up her on-hand notebook (of which there were many) for emphasis, one simply labeled Miscellaneous.
‘Well, actually, I was the one to confe—‘ Shouyo-kun impatiently started, only to be stopped by,
Bop.
Tobio-kun’s trademark tsukkomi-style headslap reserved only for his boyfriend made its first appearance of the day, somehow not even fazing Hitoka, who was too used to it being pulled out at a moment’s notice at practices.
‘Actually. We confessed at the same time. But he did it by shouting it to me, and I did it by messaging him.’
‘Your cell service sucks, Tobio! Did I ever tell you I only got the message notification right as we had our first kis—’
Bop.
Hitoka ignored the mental image of her two good friends kissing (and Shouyo-kun’s howls of pain), and scribbled the more important point of different confession styles existing down to remember for later.
‘You… I’m sorry? Koushi keeps telling me that messaging to confess is lame, but… you did it, Tobio-kun? Should I just message her about my feelings?’
A resounding ‘NO’ was the answer to Hitoka’s innocent question, nearly giving her a mini heart attack.
Crossing out ‘messaging her’ in my list of options…
‘Okay, whatever, I guess… if that’s not okay, then what is?’ Hitoka felt at a loss yet again, but was fighting for her life to keep any hint of dejectedness out of her tone.
‘Be direct,’ came Tobio-kun’s very… boring, yet fitting reply.
‘And show that you really really mean it! Make it sound like a BOOM, or, or, maybe a KADOOON!’ came Shouyo-kun’s, full of life and enthusiasm.
Did I just hear him right??
‘K-kabedon?? I have to kabedon Shimizu-senpai!???’
‘…’
～✧～
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:16 PM
> hitomin~
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:16 PM
> You’re *really* going to hold me to this, senpai?
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:18 PM
> yes. <33
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:20 PM
> …But our meeting is in five minutes, what do I do after??? What do I say?? I wasn’t seriously planning on actually telling her!
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:20 PM
> justt
> idk
> tell her you have something important to talk about. shell probs know whats coming
> >33333
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:22 PM
> It’s that simple to you?? …
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:22 PM
> i promise it really is girlie
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> it really is
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> My life is over…
> Why can’t I do this over winter break?? I’ll have time to recover if it goes badly, right?
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> no
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:24 PM
> youll be miserable and i dont ever want that for you girl
> go to your meeting. let me know if you need anything i mean it
> good luck
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:27 PM
> love you hitomin <333333
～✧～
‘K-Koushi? Are you there…?’
I know my voice says it all.
‘Hitomin?’
I can’t bring myself to respond.
‘…You need me to come back to school to… walk you home, don’t you. I’ll be right there, I promise.’
He knows. I’d normally be panicked about being such an inconvenience that I’d never even think to ask this of him, but… I can hardly think of anything other than myself and my own feelings.
Hitoka was standing right at the outside of the imposing front gates of the school, having stayed back after a shortened practice to attend a meeting with Takeda-sensei and Shimizu-senpai — after its adjournment, Hitoka privately confessed her feelings to her fellow club manager, with an intensity that surprised even herself.
And got sympathetically rejected.
Hitoka could tell that Shimizu-senpai had put more effort into her response than she would have with any guy at school — it probably wasn’t an everyday thing to have a girl confess her love, for one (maybe an every-month thing, she figured?), but they were still, well, co-managers.
‘Let’s forget this and continue as friends, then,’ Hitoka had mustered out after her upperclasswoman’s kind but invariably-disappointing response came, flashing her well-practiced forced smile.
But she knew she was lying, she knew that continuing as friends was impossible — unless if Kiyoko-senpai had fixation amnesia caused by… Korsakoff syndrome, or something(??), Hitoka knew that even if her upperclasswoman tried to ‘forgive’ the sin of her having a crush… she wouldn’t ever forget.
Hitoka looked up at the sky while she waited for Koushi to come; it was characteristically dreary for an early December afternoon. Though no rain had fallen yet, she wouldn’t have been surprised if the forecast called for it.
Maybe the rainclouds would only target her, just to match her rainy feelings at the moment.
The scenery looked just about the same as always — tree-dotted hills in the distance mixing in with modest buildings and the occasional car passing through — but it somehow seemed a bit… sadder than usual, perhaps, to Hitoka.
Not that she didn’t know why, anyways.
Though, something was breaking up her heartbroken monotony — the roaring of what sounded like a motorcycle?
Not exactly uncommon, really, but the worrier that Hitoka was, her thoughts of course turned to the best way of fighting off an imaginary bousouzoku biker gang… and pleading for her life to be spared.
That motorcycle — it was a motorcycle! — was going awfully fast for a residential road, too, but thankfully not in Hitoka’s direction.
Or so she thought, until she suddenly thought to (haphazardly) hide herself behind a shrub as the bike took a right turn, seemingly directly headed to the front gates of the school.
This was clearly very not good, but she just had to stay calm…
Hitoka had never seen a motorcycle up close before, much less heard one up close, so her ears rung a little even after the rider and their passenger stopped to the left of the gates — they both were helmet-clad, so she wasn’t able to make out who they were from just clothing alone.
Only the person riding on the driver’s back got off, seeming to take a quick look around for someone… or maybe, to see if anyone was there, Hitoka worried. She didn’t want to be a witness to a crime!
Maybe if I make a run for it… no, they have their driver with them… maybe I can hide deeper into these bushes? No, I can’t make any sounds or else I’ll be found, and who knows what they’d do to me…
Being engrossed in her own worries, Hitoka failed to pay attention to the fact that the now-dismounted rider had characteristic grey hair, and was worriedly speaking to a turquoise-and-white-clad young man —
and thusly was very, very, very startled when she saw not only Aoba Johsai’s Oikawa-san, but also her very own best friend in Koushi, peering down at her like she was some sort of zoo exhibit.
‘Koushi-senpai owns a motorcycle? T-that’s kind of dangerous, don’t you think…?’
She was still hiding in the bushes, and Koushi simply held his hand out to her in return, seemingly on-the-spot deciding to explain further as she took it.
‘It’s Tohru’s bike. He’s a good driver, you know? Gets places fast when you need him.’ he explained, blowing a goodbye kiss to the other boy (who was already halfway back to his vehicle).
‘But — you, young lady, look like you’ve been through a lot today, haven’t you. No matter what, I’m proud of course, but do you want to talk about it on the way to your place? I’ll buy you whatever you want.’
Koushi was kind and understanding as always — there was no disputing it at all.
But… Hitoka wanted to push her luck just a little, as she knew it would be a difficult night for her once the realization of her rejection properly sank in more and more.
‘Koushi… may I- we, may we go to your house? Together? Please? I don’t want to go back home tonight, my mother is going to ask too many questions and I’m not good at hiding when I’m sad and-‘
Warmth — sudden, but perhaps the strongest Hitoka had felt it in quite some time. A very welcome feeling, straight from the bear hug Koushi had wrapped her in in response.
‘Of course,’ he planted a kiss to the top of Hitoka’s head, yet another act she would permit from him and only him — especially because she knew he meant it essentially platonically, in a way that would never serve to hurt her.
I love him…
～✧～
The two were sitting on Koushi’s bed together — more accurately, Hitoka astraddle on his lap, using him as a literal shoulder to cry on, as Koushi held her.
He was warm, and kind, and for some reason smelled like cookies(?), but those things (save the cookies, usually) were generally givens for her best friend, and weren’t worth thinking about much — instead, Hitoka tried her best to give her account of the story of her very first, and very fresh, heartbreak.
‘…So… Takeda-sensei said we were free to go after telling us about some plans he had changed for our schedule…’
‘Mhm…?’
‘Oh my god, Koushi, I messed up so badly and I don’t know what I’m going to do… I- she obviously won’t talk to me again, and I should just quit the team and die because if she doesn’t talk to me I won’t learn from her and I need to do that because once she graduates I’ll be the only manager and-‘
‘Poor girl… breathe, okay? You’re looking a little blue in the face, you know.’ Koushi sympathetically patted her head softly.
‘I’m feeling a little blue, too…’
‘I know, I know, I understand. Just try your best to tell me what happened, and save your opinions for after, okay?’ he squeezed her a little harder, seemingly so as to provide a reassuring presence.
He’s like what I imagine those protagonists in shoujo manga end up with... Something like that.
‘I asked Shimizu-senpai if we could talk… and I told her that I had a crush on her, not that I loved her, but that I had a crush, because I don’t— didn’t love her exactly, not love love yet…’
‘And…?’
I wouldn’t be right here with you in your room if she had answered positively, you know…
‘And… she said no. That she was flattered, and she was wondering if I felt that way, but it would be best if we stayed friends, especially because she’s my senpai… even though she doesn’t really like guys…’
‘And what did you say?’
‘I thanked her and said I still wanted to be friendsl, and ran away. To the front of the school. Then I called you once I was ready to talk. …And now we’re… here.’
‘That’s it?
‘…’
‘You’re leaving something out, aren’t you…’
Perceptive as always.
‘She said I was cute…’
‘Oh-ho, that’s something, isn’t it, my dear Hitomin!?’
‘Mmm… I think she was just being nice, Koushi. Shimizu-senpai isn’t interested, so it doesn’t matter in the end, right?’ she lifted her face out of the boy’s neck, inadvertently just in time for him to sweetly boop her on the nose.
‘Nope,’ he gently rebutted, ‘you’re plenty cute, Hitoka.’
First name…
‘You… you really mean it, senpai?’
‘Of course I do! You know that I always say things how they are, and the facts say that you, my dear Hitomin, are very cute.’
He’s always kind to me, but rarely ever this much. He must be really worried…
Without knowing how to respond with her words, Hitoka simply nuzzled into Koushi’s chest a little, pinning him down onto the bed with the little strength she could use, so that she was lying on top of him. She was sure it would look suspicious to a hypothetical nosy onlooker, but… she knew Koushi would understand she didn’t mean anything unsavory by it — it was just how they were.
Hitoka really just needed warmth and comfort to take her out of her deep disappointment, and knew it was something her best friend could provide — he was someone who would never and could never hurt her, for a variety of reasons, after all.
And there was nothing wrong with it, even if others got the wrong idea from time to time, like Shimizu-senpai did before.
Nothing wrong at all…
‘I love you, Koushi…’
‘Two love confessions in one day!? Someone’s a little brazen, huh?’ he mock-widened his eyes, laughing at his own poking fun at his best friend.
‘You… know… what I mean… I think… I hope… it’s e-embarrassing, anyways, so please don’t make me say it again…’
‘Sorry, I didn’t catch that?’
‘Please don’t make me s— does hearing me say such a thing really make you that happy, Koushi?’
‘Maybe,’ he grinned up at her.
He’s the worst…
‘I l-love you. Koushi-senpai. You know how I mean it.’
‘And I love you very much as well, my dearest Hitomin.’
~✧~
(end)
No, she couldn’t be obsessed.
Sure, from the too-many times she discussed it with Shouyo-kun, the way she felt was different from how he was with Tobio-kun. She was more than fine with that, happy, even. They’re boys, she reasoned. What could be more natural than a spirited, passionate, heavy, sensual relat-
Hitoka had to pause juuust for a minute to clear out the fujoshi-colored cobwebs from her mind right then — her good friends were cute together, and she was oftentimes dragged out to be a mediator between them, but whatever they did together was none of her business.
Pit, pat, she slapped her cheeks twice to will herself into getting a grip. Clear your mind. Do it. doitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoit-
Starting from the top —
Hitoka Yachi couldn’t be obsessed, at all!
That was impossible. She had no time for romance, no time for relationships that weren’t friendships, because she was a very busy student, manager, and friend! She spent all of her past Saturday teaching Shouyo-kun how to fold origami crows — ‘for some lame art project’, as he put it, only to immediately change his tune once she suggested something remotely related to volleyball — and used her Sunday to do meal prep and study at the same time. (Note to self: don’t accidentally place flashcards in, on, or near a donabe hot pot EVER again.)
Oh, and she had another phone call with Tobio-kun about preparing for a test on Wednesday for his history class last Friday night… and a few texts from Koushi-senpai from last Thursday(!!) she still hadn’t replied to yet, or even looked at! Were the rumors about him dating Oikawa-san true? Or was it something else? He was going to hate her for being so slow to respond for sure, whatever it was…
Someone like that, she attempted to rationalize, had zero time to think about anything that wasn’t related to staying alive, studying, art, and friends, in that order. Or was ‘friends’ above ‘art’??
But.
Hitoka’s mind was always racing, racing, racing, with worries and fear. Some would say she didn’t have a relaxed bone in her body, which would indubitably make her want to get an MRI to see if she had osteoporosis or not.
Wait, no, osteoporosis is weakened bones, tremors (mini-seizures?) (mini-strokes??) cause shaking, right? Or is it RLS, restless leg syndrome? Or am I having an anxiety attack? Or a panic attack? Should I get an MRI? Do you even diagnose osteoporosis with MRIs? Wait, why would I be having a panic attack now, it’s 1 AM! Ohh…….
So maybe, just maybe, it was a completely normal thing that a
Hitoka was more than fine with being Villager B, after all, because it kept her protected from scary situations, like having a pretty upperclasswoman (who was coincidentally her ideal body type in a partner, which Hitoka didn’t even know she had!!) visit her in class to talk.
She always became so surprised when anyone noticed her, so having someone who was not only an upperclasswoman but also drop-dead gorgeous take her by the hand like it was nothing and ask her to join some club as the manager?
She agreed right on the spot, how could she not? Of course, she was so mesmerized that she would have probably said ‘yes’ to anything, which she knew was a dangerous state to be in, but since coming out of her shell just a little, Hitoka never regretted her choice. And it was all thanks to her…
Okay.
Maybe Hitoka was a liiiittttle obsessed. Not a lot, though! Just a totally, completely, average amount of feelings for a girl to feel about her upperclasswoman. Right?
…Right?
～✧～
'I’m a mess, Sugawara-senpai…’
Hitoka slammed her half-finished strawberry milk carton down, defeatedly burying her forehead into her arms laid out onto the the desk in front of her. Behind her was one sympathetic-looking-as-always Sugawara Koushi, who was sitting hunched-over on the foot of her bed.
‘Don’t say things like that about yourself, Hitomin! Missing a few texts here and there is nothing to worry about. You’re a busy girl, I get it. I’ve been a busy gal sometimes, too. It happens!’
‘Thanks, Sugawara-senpai…’ Hitoka listlessly muttered, genuinely grateful for the reassuring advice but completely unable to show it.
‘…That’s not it, is it.’
Sugawara-senpai was perceptive as always.
He was the one upperclassman Hitoka actually spent meaningful time with outside of volleyball and school (because he was very easy to talk to and pretty and good at cooking and pretty), so his regularly-keen perception was stronger with her.
Hitoka nodded in confirmation ever-so-slightly, turning her head to take a peek at Sugawara-senpai’s expression… it was a rare sight, seeing him so deep in thought. Everything about relationships and people seemed to come so naturally to him, which she couldn’t relate to whatsoever.
‘What’s on your mind? We both know something’s bothering you, so saying it might make you feel better, you know.’
‘Are you dating Oikawa from Aoba Johsai, Sugawara-senpai?’
He momentarily choked on the melon bread he had bought on the way home with Hitoka, clearly not seeming to expect a stunner of a question like that.
‘I-that was not the thing that was on your mind, there’s no way. Also, we’re not at school, just call me Koushi!’
‘But… but, it feels so awkward calling someone their first name when they’re a senpai, even though you’re you… you know I’m bad at yobisute.’
‘I bought you your strawberry milk, so in return, just call me Koushi. It’s a done deal. We’ve been friends for soooo long now, you know.’
But five months is nothing when measured against the age of the Earth... him and I are still in the dinosaur ages, if anything…
‘Sugawara-senpai,’ Sugawara audibly groaned upon hearing his efforts fail—‘are you dating Oikawa-san from Aoba Johsai?’
Sugawara took a deep breath. ‘Now wheeeeere did you hear that rumor, young lady?’
‘From Shimizu-senpai.’
‘Figures. Does she seriously go around telling our secrets to everyone on the team? Grr.’
‘No, just me.’
‘…What else does she know?’
‘About Yui-senpai from the girls’ team and Sawamura-senpai…’
‘Everyone knows that, girlie.’
‘Uh… Yamaguchi-kun had a crush on me when I first joined the team as a manager…’
‘Oh? So that’s what’s been bothering you lately, huh?!’
…No??
‘…Wait, I forgot, you’re not into guys. Sorry, sorry!’ Sugawara put his hands a defensive posture, instantly seeming to inwardly kick himself for the slip-up.
Hitoka sighed despondently. She was no stranger to feeling unsure of herself, after all, but matters of love were all-too foreign to her.
‘…Is it a girl I know?’
‘I-it is…’
‘Is it someone on the boys’ volleyball team?’
‘Yes.’
Wait, there’s only one other girl on the team, and it’s her, why did I say that, how did he get it out of me oh no oh no oh noooo…
‘Well, that only leaves one person, then! My dear Hitomin, you have something in common with some of the boys on the team, don’t you now?’
‘…’
Hitoka simply gave a quizzical look to Sugawara, as if to say that her feelings were most certainly not the same kind of lust(?) the boys had for their older manager.
‘Soooo,’ Sugawara seemed to decide to backtrack, ‘how did that happen? I’ve had my suspicions for a while, but didn’t want to press you about it, of course. Gaydar and all that.’
‘…She’s pretty…’
‘You’ve said that about me and Tohru, too, though, and you’re not like this over us. That’s really it?’
‘Existing with people is… hard. I never had anyone to talk to outside of school, and nobody really noticed me, either. I was just an average Villager B. Still am… But, she chose me to be the team’s new manager. I was so scared, having such a popular and pretty upperclasswoman ask to talk to me outside of class, my legs were shaking for the rest of the day…’
‘So you decided you were in love-‘
A small ‘Eep!’ escaped Hitoka’s lips — she was not feeling ready to have such a frank discussion about her feelings!
‘In love with Kiyoko-san from the moment she noticed you?’
‘Maybe just shocked… the l-love came later…’
'Hmm… how do you think she feels about you?’
Hitoka thought the answer to this was obvious. So, she rehearsed the same words she had ran through her mind over and over again thinking about this very topic,
‘She just sees me as her apprentice kouhai, nothing more. And… that’s okay.’ she added that last part almost like a manifestation to make it true.
‘Is it really okay? You sure don’t seem okay, Hitoka…’ Sugawara never uses my first name in full unless if he’s was worried about me, which means I’m in for an earful, oh no… he’ll definitely hate me now.
‘I don’t know if Kiyoko-san feels the same way, but I do know you’re never going to feel better until you do something about it.’
He patted Hitoka on the head, undoubtedly the only person she would accept that behavior from. ‘Look at me, okay, Hitomin?’
Hitoka made a point to look anywhere Sugawara wasn’t at the moment. Normally she wouldn’t be as non-compliant, but she was being dragged through this conversation by her best friend’s sheer willpower despite truly not wanting to take part.
‘Hitomiiiiin…’
Hitoka started to feel a little bad… but then she hoped if she kept at it long enough, he would drop it.
‘Hey…’
Hitoka’s head slooooowly started to turn, gracefully maneuvered by Sugawara’s dainty fingers. Her expression was undoubtedly one of pure defeat.
‘Good. Now you’re looking at me!’ He cupped her cheeks in his hands, yet another move only she would (begrudgingly, this time) accept from him.
‘We’re going to make a plan for this! I don’t like seeing you so listless, Hitomin! So until you’re feeling better, this is my priority number one, got it?’ Sugawara smiled, his eyes warm and kind.
Shouganai.
‘…Got it…’
‘There you go! We’re already on our way to having Kiyoko-san madly fall in love with you, Hitomin!’
‘I-IN LOVE?’ Hitoka could barely stammer a repetition of his words out, which resulted in her saying them at a much higher volume than she had intended to.
‘Mhm! I’ll ask Tohru what he thinks, too… and maybe Daichi, then?’ Sugawara probed.
‘Daichi-senpai has known Shimizu-senpai for a long time, right?’
‘Yep! They’re childhood friends, so he knows her very well. I don’t know if he can help, but I’ll try anything for you, Hitomin!’
‘Thank you… Okay… I can’t believe this, you really think this is a g-good idea, Sugawara-senpai?’
‘Koushi.’
‘Koushi…san…?’
‘Ko-u-shi.’
‘What if she h-hates me, Koushi? I already worry about you hating me, Shouyo-kun and Tobio-kun hating me, my mother hating me, and even my teachers hating me! I don’t want this to go wrong…’ Hitoka hung her head in shame, her face burning with worry.
‘You really think Kiyoko-san already doesn’t get tens of love confessions every week, Hitomin? Even other girls do it. If things don’t go well, I’m sure she’ll forget in a few weeks, but if they do go well… you’ll have yourself a girlfriend, won’t you?’ Sugawara was beaming with pride at what he seemed to think was an unstoppable plan.
‘You think too positively, Koushi-senpai…’ Hitoka mumbled.
‘And you,’ he lightly booped her nose, ‘think you’re never going to have good things happen to you. They will. Just wait and see.’
～✧～
Sigh…
Am I really doing this?
Hitoka was standing outside of one of the third-year classrooms (Shimizu-senpai’s clasroom, actually, not Koushi’s) under the false pretense of eating lunch with Koushi, feeling like a fool for even considering knocking on the currently shut door.
Like she’d be intruding just because she was a kouhai…
Her real aim was to have lunch with Shimizu-senpai, in a plan fully devised by Koushi — he called it ‘foolproof’, but Hitoka was very unsure it would pan out like how he thought it would.
After all… something like this, where he’d suddenly pretend to have stomach sickness, then just rush out to leave her alone with her crush… she would see right through that, right? Shimizu-senpai wasn’t dumb, after all…
But perhaps it wasn’t the time to be worrying so much. After all, she had promised Koushi she’d try her best to follow his plan… but it was so nerve-wracking to think about!
The door shook, momentarily stunning Hitoka right in her tracks… thusly making her unable to escape from the sight of those in the classroom in time as the door swung open, barely shielded by a girl walking out of the classroom and her (probably?) boyfriend.
‘Oh, Hitomin! There you are, come in, come in!’ Koushi called in his usual completely carefree manner, not seeming to belie any hint of an ulterior motive at all.
Hitoka was shaking — oh god I’m really in it now aren’t I do I really have to do this why can’t I just have a heart attack right now and die or at least faint so I can go to the sick bay and not have to do this it’s gonna be so awkward and I won’t be able to-
‘Hitomin! Do I need to drag you in myself!?’ Koushi laughed just a little — she abruptly realized was making a fool of herself the longer she stayed paralyzed in the doorway, so with a ‘sorry for the wait!’, she forced herself towards the back left of the classroom, where he sat desks-pushed-together with Shimizu-senpai, not before giving a quick bow to the both.
She was as pretty as always…
‘Sugawara-kun was telling me he invited you to eat with us… it’s nice to see you outside of club activities, Yachi-chan.’
-Chan!??
Shimizu-senpai’s casual, really meaningless usage of the familiar suffix always tended to fluster Hitoka, even though she really meant nothing behind it other than casual friendship — or so Hitoka assumed, anyways.
‘H-hi, uh, I mean, hello, Shimizu-senpai! It’s nice to see you too, Kou-, uh, Sugawara-senpai invited me, so I decided to stop b-by. Yeah.’
Nailed it…
Koushi gave Hitoka a despondent look that seemed to say something like, ‘That’s really the best you could do?’, but quickly seemed to decide that it wouldn’t help and stopped.
‘That’s right!! Hitomin is a good friend of mine, after all, so she’s always welcome to hang with us.’
‘Hmm… I see. Who do you usually spend lunch with, Yachi-chan?’
I’m going to look so lame.
‘Oh, I usually spend lunch by myself… but it’s only because- ‘cause I’m studying! Not because I’m alone or anything, ahaha, haha.. I just like to study.’
‘R-right! It’s a real problem sometimes when I text her and she doesn’t respond because she’s up all night studying, isn’t that right, Hitomin? For realsies, haha..’
This looks so conspicuous.
‘Well… attending to your studies is important, Yachi-chan,’ Shimizu-senpai started off, ‘but make sure that you’re getting rest, too. You won’t do well as a manager if you’re too tired to help out, right?’ she gently insisted.
Hitoka nodded frantically — probably much too enthusiastically for what amounted to a nonchalant polite tip from her senpai, and (certainly very conspicuously) glanced over at Koushi to see how she was doing.
Koushi did not meet her eyes.
‘Um, you’re right, Shimizu-sen—‘
‘Sick bay. Stomach. Sorrrrry!!’ Koushi ran his escape route, managing to bang his thigh on a desk, knocking it over, cursing, then dashing out the door.
…Flawless.
‘Uh, i-is he okay? Should we go and check, on, him…?’ Hitoka wasn’t prepared for the suddenness of Koushi’s outburst despite knowing it would happen, so she tried to put her best to put on a believable worried face.
‘I think he’ll be fine, though we won’t be seeing him at practice, won’t we.’
‘N-nope, I don’t think so!’ Hitoka nervously laughed — she had no idea how to act one on one with Shimizu-senpai!
While Hitoka thought what to say next, Shimizu-senpai seemed to take to studying her almost certainly worried… or flustered, rather, expression. It only served to scramble Hitoka’s brain even more — having her crush! look at her for such an extended period of time was scary!
‘You look so nervous, Yachi-chan… I see how you are with Koushi-kun during practices, I know you’re not afraid of all of your senpai, are you? Are you so friendly with him because…?’
Shimizu-senpai was clearly inquiring about Hitoka liking Koushi, which was emphatically not the case.
‘Oh, uh, no, he’s just a very good friend to me! Almost like, uhm, a big brother or a childhood friend, and besides…’
Shimizu-senpai lifted her eyebrows, seemingly very curious on what detail Hitoka trailed off on.
‘Besides?’
‘Um, I don’t, really s-swing that way, so even if it looks like we’re friendly…’
Shimizu-senpai reddened, just a little, clearly surprised at the sudden slip of the tongue by her kouhai, who was continuously reddening in realization of her huge mistake.
‘Oh my god, um, that wasn’t- I didn’t mean to- that’s not really what—‘
She was silenced by Shimizu-senpai putting a palm over her tighly clenched left hand, sitting on the desk in abject horror.
I. Wh-what? What? She’s. Why is Shimizu-senpai touching my hand??? Is she trying to drain my lifeforce away?? Her hand’s really soft, oh my god…
‘I understand, Yachi-chan — you’re very brave to tell me. I won’t judge you or think differently of you, after all, I…’
Huh? Is she… also…?
‘You… Shimizu-senpai…?’
‘Hm? Oh, forget I said anything, Yachi-chan.’
Just like that, the moment seemed like it was over — Shimizu-senpai’s hand off of Hitoka’s, but with Hitoka still looking unignorably beet-red.
‘Is there anyone you’re as close to as Koushi-kun?’
‘Uh…’
‘Well, there is someone I’d like to be close to, but… I don’t know if, if she feels… if she wants to, uh, hang out. And talk, and, stuff.’
What am I doing!??
Shimizu-senpai simply giggled softly for reasons that were unknowable to Hitoka.
‘Well… if there’s any advice I can give you, it’ll have to wait until practice is over, hmm?’
Hitoka hummed softly, looking at the clock — Shimizu-senpai was implicitly sending her off, as there was only a minute or two before the lunch period was over.
‘R-right! Thank you, Shimizu-senpai… I—I’ll go check on Kous-uh, Sugawara-senpai now!! Bye!’
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god-
～✧～
Koushi was not, in fact, at practice — much to Hitoka’s surprise.
He was, however, waiting at her apartment — thankfully not inside, but loitering right outside the door, looking probably very suspicious to anyone who saw him.
What would the neighbors think…
‘Koushi?’
‘My dearest Hitomin…?’
‘Were you actually sick? You weren’t at practice… I feel bad about asking, but you should go home if you are, I don’t want to catch anything from you.’
‘Oh, I just wanted to get off early so I could go to Shimada Mart. Aaaaand see a movie.’
‘You saw a movie instead of diligently studying for your exams??’
‘I abso-lutely did!’
And you’d think he’d be the mature one as my senpai…
‘So, about Shimizu-senpai…’
‘Tell me everything. Gimme the deets. Spill the tea.’
‘T-tea!? There’s- there’s tea spilt? On the ground? I think that’s just from when it rained in the morning, senpai…’
Koushi mock-facepalmed with clear dramatic intent.
‘No, silly, it’s an express- you know what, forget it, can we go inside so I can make some tea while you spill it?’
Hitoka wore that same frantic look she did ten seconds prior.
‘Metaphorically?’ he tried again.
‘Sure! You know your way around this apartment better than I do, so you know where everything is…’ she fiddled with her keys, successfully unlocking the door on her fourth try.
—
‘So, the movie I saw…’ Koushi was busying himself with heating a pot of water, preparing their usual tea orders — black (a taste acquired from her modern mother, who she had lived with in England throughout middle school) for her, and green (iced) for him.
‘Was it a romance movie?’ Hitoka figured that he would try to tie in part of the plot to her current situation to come up with yet another harebrained scheme.
‘Huh? No, but… why would you think that, Hitomin? Did something good happen today…? Hmm…?’
‘W-well, uhmm…’
The kettle was starting to steam a little.
‘I… she, held my hand- no, not held, but she, touched my hand? On purpose?? I think???’ Hitoka said it almost as if she was still trying to confirm it happened in reality.
‘Held your hand?!’ — he seemed to ignore Hitoka’s clarifications otherwise — ‘Wow, you must have really made an impression, gratz! When’s the wedding? I’m obviously the best man and flower boy, right?’
W-wedding!?? Isn’t that much too presumptuous!?? Best man???
‘We’re not even… dating, or anything… and she didn’t do it because of anything I did, well, I guess I told her I don’t like guys, and—‘
‘You came out to her, and then she held your hand right after, Hitomin!? I have no idea how you found the courage, girl, but you’ve outdone yourself!’ Koushi seemed to have genuine relief written on his face.
‘What are my-‘ — her words were interrupted by the high-pitched whistling of the now-ready kettle — ‘what are my chances now? You seem to think it’s been a big success so far…’
‘Of course it’s been a big success — I was the one who knew this would happen.’ Koushi smugly replied as he poured water over their mugs.
‘But… what do I do now?’
‘Hmm… how about a group date?’
‘Dating two people at once? I… don’t think I’d… like that…?’
Koushi gently mock-bonked his much shorter friend on the head in a manner reminiscent of a certain setter’s classic tsukkomi-style attack on his boyfriend, smiling all the while.
‘No, silly, it’s like… for example, if me and Tohru, or Shouyo and Tobio were to hang out with you and Kiyoko-san. Something for friends who are in relationships to do.’
‘Oh! That sounds fun, but… we’re not in a relationship, so it won’t work, right? Good idea, though…’ Hitoka was feeling uncharacteristically disappointed at her self-convincing about her best friend’s idea not being viable, yet also very happy she wouldn’t need to go out of her comfort zone again.
‘Well,’ — Koushi nimbly removed the teabags from Hitoka’s dangerously-close-to-oversteeping black tea — ‘if it’s just me and Tohru, we can go as friends, right? Tohru and Kiyoko-san have some… history together, but I’m sure he’d put it all aside to help you out. He already knows all about how you’re in love, after all.’
Hitoka was dangerously close to spitting out her scaldingly hot tea as it were, and could only barely choke her sip down before she could respond.
‘You told him!?’
…Did he have any advice?’
‘Honey, of course I’d tell him — we’re boyfriends, and nothing gets unsaid between us, except for our strategies on the court… though I’ve tried to get Bluecastle’s out of him before, hehe. He said that someone as cute as you should have no problem getting her to like you!’
Hitoka blushed a little — she knew that a gay man calling her cute was different from how other guys meant it, but… it still counted as a compliment she virtually never heard, and another thing to smile about.
‘…Maybe actually talking to Oikawa-san will be fun.’
~✧~
‘Ooh…’
Oikawa-san was intently staring at Hitoka like she was a half-finished oil painting, his stylish beret only accentuated the artistic expression he wore. The action only made her a little uncomfortable, somehow, but it was still unnerving enough to make her blush.
‘No. I can’t see it. I just don’t understand what she sees in you, Yacchirin.’
I think he has this backwards!?? It’s me liking Shimizu-senpai…
‘U-uh, maybe that’s because I’m the one who likes—‘
‘Rude, Tohru!! Do you know what your words are implying here??’ Another familiar voice broke out into the fray, though with an all-too unfamiliar harsh tone.
‘Kou-chan, come onnn! I don’t mean it like Yacchirin is unattractive or anything, she’s just so different from Kiyoko! You do see it, right!?’ came his partner’s scoffing reply.
‘Just a few days ago you said I should tell her you said she would have no problem getting with Kiyoko-san, and now this!? Way to kill her confidence, haven’t you been listening all the times I’ve told you about poor Hitomin’s issues with confidence??’
They’re going on like I’m not sitting in front of them… and I’m invisible like always…
…Koushi and Oikawa-san were a lovely couple, both in looks as well as personality, truly — though they got into spats too much for Hitoka’s comfort, she knew they were good for each other.
Hopefully they would be good for her, too.
After all… they had gotten her this far, right?
Waiting in a cafe for Shimizu-senpai to show up for brunch.
On a Sunday morning.
For a group ‘friend date’, whatever that really meant. Hitoka prided herself on her English scores at school, and as such she felt the two words made an oxymoron, but that was the least of her worries.
It was an understatement to say Hitoka was nervous, and Oikawa-san and Koushi’s public discussing of her relationship woes (thankfully without Shimizu-senpai at the table) did not do much of anything to relax her — rather the opposite, really.
‘Like I was saying…’ — she took a momentary break in their bickering to slip in — ‘Uhm, Oikawa…-san, I think you have it a little… mixed up? I’m the one who lov—likes, Shimizu-senpai. And I don’t think she likes me, so…’ Hitoka trailed off.
‘We don’t not know she doesn’t like you, though!’ Koushi cheerfully interjected, seemingly completely unaware his usage of a double negative rendered his compliment null, void, and legally an insult.
But before Hitoka could correct that, a sight momentarily not only took her breath away, but also threatened to increase her already slightly pounding Tylenol-less headache. Shimizu-senpai was rapidly approaching their booth, and she was in street clothes(!!), not in the ubiquitous team jacket or a school uniform, but in her own style.
And she was gorgeous, to say the least, Hitoka thought — she didn’t expect a leather jacket(!!) to fit so well on Shimizu-senpai’s… body(!?), and her cream-colored knit scarf accented her supple(!??) skin in a way that Hitoka could only readily describe as radiant.
To put it in other words, Yachi Hitoka was unabashedly, unmistakably, and unacceptably,
down bad.
She could only pray her thoughts weren’t written on her likely increasingly reddening face. (Stopping it from happening was pure fantasy.)
Oh my god, she just sat next to me. She’s so pretty. I’m going to hyperventilate right here and now. I’m going to die at this cute little cafe and they’re going to shut down because it’ll be the cafe where the girl hyperventilated to death and I’m going to disrupt the economy and I’ll—
‘Hmm?’ Shimizu-senpai curiously peered at Hitoka, who was unknowingly zoned out looking right at her crush.
‘Ahh, it’s, nothing! I’m just… uh, you’re very pr— your scarf is v-very pretty, Shimizu-senpai, and I was looking at you— at it, to see where you… got it…?’
Nailed it.
Shimizu-senpai gave a look that seemed a bit knowing to Koushi, one that Hitoka worried was one of regret — but then she fixed her eyes on Hitoka’s as if nothing was wrong, melting all of the younger girl’s worries away.
‘Oh, this scarf? I actually bought it at the Mitsukoshi department store in Sendai a few years ago, it’s one of my favorites.’
‘I see!’ Hitoka stammered out, trying to keep her cool in the face of… well, the face of her crush.
‘I bet you’d look cute in it, Yacchirin~’ the peanut gallery (Oikawa) cooed from across the table, clearly enjoying Hitoka turning redder and redder all the while.
‘Really? …Well, I don’t know about tha—!?‘ Hitoka’s voice was muffled by Shimizu-senpai suddenly (gently) wrapping the scarf around her neck, the older girl’s fingertips gently brushing against the back of the blonde’s neck, making her slightly shiver despite the newfound warmth of the fabric.
‘You’re right, she really does look cute… right, Kiyoko-san?’ Koushi probed.
‘She does look cute in it. I think it suits Yachi-chan very nicely.’ Shimizu-senpai softly smiled, almost inadvertently threatening to turn Hitoka into goo inside.
If I make it out of this alive. I’m going to thank Koushi and Oikawa-senpai after this. Profusely.
—
Brunch was very eventful.
Hitoka thought the most shocking part of it was when the waitress drew a heart on Oikawa-san’s omurice right in front of Koushi like it was nothing. (Koushi and Oikawa-san were even holding hands, too!)
She had never seen Koushi that irritated before, but it seemed like he completely forgot all about it once Oikawa-san fed him a little… They were adorable together.
Hitoka internally knew her souffle pancakes were very tasty, as expected for such a chic little cafe, but she could hardly focus on the tartness of the bright-red strawberry soufflé topping them! Not over the sight of Shimizu-senpai nibbling at her dark chocolate croissant.
…She was shameless.
Koushi and Oikawa-san were almost certainly aware of just how awkward Hitoka (always) was, yet they somehow were able to keep things running smoothly enough that… the friend date somehow, somehow, didn’t feel like a disaster.
Sure, she had stumbled over her words more than the average person would, and sure, she had very nearly spilled pancake syrup over her cardigan, and sure, she had almost choked on her Earl Grey twice because of her chronic overthinking, but…
Even with some to-be-expected minor faults here and there, she counted her disasterless morning as a huge victory. To think she would have gone from hardly being able to talk to her crush at school, to… still hardly being able to talk to her crush, but on a date(!) was something Hitoka would have never in a million years considered possible, after all.
She needed to make it up to those two sometime, no matter if things worked out with Shimizu-senpai or not. Maybe another brunch, or karaoke, or a theme park, or… well, in the end, she would probably just let Koushi pick instead of her, anyways.
With warm goodbyes exchanged between Shimizu-senpai (it seemed she was busy and couldn’t stay long?) and the others, Hitoka was left with breathing room for the first time in what felt like hours.
Finally.
‘Heyyy, Hitomin~’
Or not.
～✧～
‘You need to confess to her, really soon.’
It was nearly three weeks after the brunch date, and nothing had really come out of it, at least from what Hitoka could see… which she had expected, sure, but it would have been nice to have something change.
But.
Hitoka was taken by surprise by not only the directness of Koushi taking her aside with no warning, but also his clear seriousness — it wasn’t like him to be so forceful with her, so… she figured that he really meant what he said, and had thought about it for a while, too.
‘What? I… do…?’
‘The Spring Tournament is really soon, and… well, not that I don’t think you won’t help us out lots even if you’re still feeling worried, but… it's the national tournament, you know?’ he scratched the back of his head, clearly quite nervous about what he was bringing up.
She knew exactly what he was implying, but had a feeling he would never actually say it. She understood his rationale, especially because it would be his last tournament with the team.
And Shimizu-senpai's, too.
‘For the sake of myself, but also Shimizu-senpai and the team, you want me to put an end to this, one way or another?’
She also knew that Koushi had a point — seven months of being the manager-in-training of the club, with the vast majority of them spent ever-so-slightly internally freaking out over the very woman training her, was… likely not doing the team or herself well. There was no sense in ruining the moment of those she had worked so hard to support, not at all, and... Hitoka couldn't say that she didn't understand, in the end.
Koushi hung his head, looking shameful — even though he was the one imposing on Hitoka, she felt bad for even putting him in the position of asking her to do something about her problem!
‘This isn’t about the team. I’m just worried about you, Hitomin. You don’t need extra stress in your life, especially not when our club is going to be so busy soon, you know?’ He softly placed his left hand on hers.
I guess that makes me feel like a little bit less of a burden. Koushi has already helped me so much with everything, so…
‘I’ll do it.’
A month and a half after Hitoka had turned to Koushi out of something similar to desperation, and…
What had changed, exactly?
She certainly didn’t feel more headstrong, or sure of herself, or ready to confess.
But she had a feeling that she wouldn’t feel any different even if she were to wait — she was the sort of neurotic personality that thrived on taking momentous yet paralyzingly scary steps forward.
Confessing to Shimizu-senpai would simply have to be another step — Villager B could fight too, after all.
—
‘—to Shimizu-senpai?!?’
Chatting with Shouyo-kun was never not a loud affair.
‘Why does everyone I tell get so surprised!?? Do we really not seem like a good enough match? Even considering her liking me was a stupid idea, oh no…’
Hitoka was situated in a (thankfully) mostly-empty first-year classroom with two certain good friends of hers, in the two bona fide freshmen stars of the volleyball club — Right before her were the very spirited (with firey hair color to match) Shouyo Hinata, and the death-stare-equipped Tobio Kageyama.
With about twenty minutes to spare before the day’s first classes, they had plenty of time to discuss her relationship woes.
‘Dumbass.’
Hitoka couldn’t resist letting out a shameful ‘Eep!’ from the black-haired boy’s sharp interjection — she was very worried Tobio-kun was also hoping to pile on the ‘Hitoka is delusional’ train that she always seemed to be riding herself.
If she wasn’t able to justify her feelings towards Shimizu-senpai to Shouyo-kun, she was done for if Mister All-Japan Youth Volleyball Team Training Camp Invitee(!!) Kageyama Tobio himself was going in for the kill!
‘Shouyo.’
Tobio-kun’s voice was as icy as ever — Hitoka would hate to be on the receiving end of any of his near-constant harsh comments… or his sets, for that matter.
‘Look at her. Hitoka doesn’t look too confident right now, huh?’
I’m right here, you know…
‘Well? She doesn’t, does she, right? Answer me, shrimp.’
Well, at least he’s not annoyed at me??
‘Y-Yes, sir!!’
Sir??????????
‘So? How ‘bout you do something about it??’
‘You can talk to her too, Mister-I-Forgot-How-To-Smile-Today!’
‘What was that!??’
Still here…
Their bickering was comical as always — Hitoka was sure that to most onlookers, Shouyo-kun and Tobio-kun were not any semblance of a picture-perfect couple by any means, but having known the two for long enough, she knew they were somehow stronger for all their fighting.
She could only pray that wouldn’t be her dynamic with Shimizu-senpai, if they got together.
—
‘Hitoka, you really think you’re ready to confess to Shimizu-senpai?’
Shouyo-kun was direct as always — it was a quality Hitoka completely lacked, and thusly muchly admired in him.
‘…No…’
Hitoka had to speak her mind and be honest, especially when important matters were concerned! She had been getting better at it lately, after all…
‘Well, the two of us can change that! Pretend I’m Shimizu-senpai, confess to me! And Tobio thought this up, so he’ll try not to be too rude about your results!’
She always seemed to find herself in the strangest of situations, always seemingly at the behest of (oddly enough) the only high school-age gay couples she knew of.
Birds of feather, or however that saying went.
‘Alright… umm, Shi…mizu, -senpai…’
God, this is so awkward!!
‘I like you. Please go out with me… or don’t if you don’t want to it’s really fine honestly and I don’t mean to force you to answer or worse actually consider me or impose on you or—‘
‘Complete and utter failure!’
What!????
Hitoka thought this situation was similar to what she imagined it would feel like to get told off by her mother for failing an English test. At least that would never happen…
‘Tobio!! Be nice!’
‘You’d really lie to her and say she doesn’t need a fuck-ton of help?’
‘I don’t want to call our good friend hopeless,’ (HOPELESS??)—‘Kusoyama, especially not when she’s so serious about this. What is wrong with—‘
‘Hopeless…?’ she tried to emulate the sharpness of Tobio-kun’s tone without making her voice waver, almost certainly completely failing.
The two froze in their tracks — it was unlike Hitoka to interject through a fight of theirs, much less… appear genuinely frustrated.
‘I’m trying. I really, really am. And it’s really, really hard for me, and I need you two to remember that. Shouyo-kun, you helped me to grow into myself so much this last June. I’m still finding my wings. Please, please… understand how new everything is to me. I could barely even talk to people in my own year without feeling like I’d die, and now I’m… doing this. Or at least, trying to. It’s scary, so please, just…’
She wasn’t sure what point her words were making, and it felt as though she was simply speaking without knowing what word would come next.
But she soldiered on, anyways.
‘And Tobio-kun… can I ask something?’
The black-haired boy simply nodded.
‘How did you confess to Shouyo-kun? I’d like to take notes, if that’s… not weird…’
She held up her on-hand notebook (of which there were many) for emphasis, one simply labeled Miscellaneous.
‘Well, actually, I was the one to confe—‘ Shouyo-kun impatiently started, only to be stopped by,
Bop.
Tobio-kun’s trademark tsukkomi-style headslap reserved only for his boyfriend made its first appearance of the day, somehow not even fazing Hitoka, who was too used to it being pulled out at a moment’s notice at practices.
‘Actually. We confessed at the same time. But he did it by shouting it to me, and I did it by messaging him.’
‘Your cell service sucks, Tobio! Did I ever tell you I only got the message notification right as we had our first kis—’
Bop.
Hitoka ignored the mental image of her two good friends kissing (and Shouyo-kun’s howls of pain), and scribbled the more important point of different confession styles existing down to remember for later.
‘You… I’m sorry? Koushi keeps telling me that messaging to confess is lame, but… you did it, Tobio-kun? Should I just message her about my feelings?’
A resounding ‘NO’ was the answer to Hitoka’s innocent question, nearly giving her a mini heart attack.
Crossing out ‘messaging her’ in my list of options…
‘Okay, whatever, I guess… if that’s not okay, then what is?’ Hitoka felt at a loss yet again, but was fighting for her life to keep any hint of dejectedness out of her tone.
‘Be direct,’ came Tobio-kun’s very… boring, yet fitting reply.
‘And show that you really really mean it! Make it sound like a BOOM, or, or, maybe a KADOOON!’ came Shouyo-kun’s, full of life and enthusiasm.
Did I just hear him right??
‘K-kabedon?? I have to kabedon Shimizu-senpai!???’
‘…’
～✧～
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:16 PM
> hitomin~
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:16 PM
> You’re *really* going to hold me to this, senpai?
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:18 PM
> yes. <33
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:20 PM
> …But our meeting is in five minutes, what do I do after??? What do I say?? I wasn’t seriously planning on actually telling her!
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:20 PM
> justt
> idk
> tell her you have something important to talk about. shell probs know whats coming
> >33333
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:22 PM
> It’s that simple to you?? …
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:22 PM
> i promise it really is girlie
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> it really is
> Me, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> My life is over…
> Why can’t I do this over winter break?? I’ll have time to recover if it goes badly, right?
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:23 PM
> no
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:24 PM
> youll be miserable and i dont ever want that for you girl
> go to your meeting. let me know if you need anything i mean it
> good luck
> Koushi-senpai, 12/7/12, 4:27 PM
> love you hitomin <333333
～✧～
‘K-Koushi? Are you there…?’
I know my voice says it all.
‘Hitomin?’
I can’t bring myself to respond.
‘…You need me to come back to school to… walk you home, don’t you. I’ll be right there, I promise.’
He knows. I’d normally be panicked about being such an inconvenience that I’d never even think to ask this of him, but… I can hardly think of anything other than myself and my own feelings.
Hitoka was standing right at the outside of the imposing front gates of the school, having stayed back after a shortened practice to attend a meeting with Takeda-sensei and Shimizu-senpai — after its adjournment, Hitoka privately confessed her feelings to her fellow club manager, with an intensity that surprised even herself.
And got sympathetically rejected.
Hitoka could tell that Shimizu-senpai had put more effort into her response than she would have with any guy at school — it probably wasn’t an everyday thing to have a girl confess her love, for one (maybe an every-month thing, she figured?), but they were still, well, co-managers.
‘Let’s forget this and continue as friends, then,’ Hitoka had mustered out after her upperclasswoman’s kind but invariably-disappointing response came, flashing her well-practiced forced smile.
But she knew she was lying, she knew that continuing as friends was impossible — unless if Kiyoko-senpai had fixation amnesia caused by… Korsakoff syndrome, or something(??), Hitoka knew that even if her upperclasswoman tried to ‘forgive’ the sin of her having a crush… she wouldn’t ever forget.
Hitoka looked up at the sky while she waited for Koushi to come; it was characteristically dreary for an early December afternoon. Though no rain had fallen yet, she wouldn’t have been surprised if the forecast called for it.
Maybe the rainclouds would only target her, just to match her rainy feelings at the moment.
The scenery looked just about the same as always — tree-dotted hills in the distance mixing in with modest buildings and the occasional car passing through — but it somehow seemed a bit… sadder than usual, perhaps, to Hitoka.
Not that she didn’t know why, anyways.
Though, something was breaking up her heartbroken monotony — the roaring of what sounded like a motorcycle?
Not exactly uncommon, really, but the worrier that Hitoka was, her thoughts of course turned to the best way of fighting off an imaginary bousouzoku biker gang… and pleading for her life to be spared.
That motorcycle — it was a motorcycle! — was going awfully fast for a residential road, too, but thankfully not in Hitoka’s direction.
Or so she thought, until she suddenly thought to (haphazardly) hide herself behind a shrub as the bike took a right turn, seemingly directly headed to the front gates of the school.
This was clearly very not good, but she just had to stay calm…
Hitoka had never seen a motorcycle up close before, much less heard one up close, so her ears rung a little even after the rider and their passenger stopped to the left of the gates — they both were helmet-clad, so she wasn’t able to make out who they were from just clothing alone.
Only the person riding on the driver’s back got off, seeming to take a quick look around for someone… or maybe, to see if anyone was there, Hitoka worried. She didn’t want to be a witness to a crime!
Maybe if I make a run for it… no, they have their driver with them… maybe I can hide deeper into these bushes? No, I can’t make any sounds or else I’ll be found, and who knows what they’d do to me…
Being engrossed in her own worries, Hitoka failed to pay attention to the fact that the now-dismounted rider had characteristic grey hair, and was worriedly speaking to a turquoise-and-white-clad young man —
and thusly was very, very, very startled when she saw not only Aoba Johsai’s Oikawa-san, but also her very own best friend in Koushi, peering down at her like she was some sort of zoo exhibit.
‘Koushi-senpai owns a motorcycle? T-that’s kind of dangerous, don’t you think…?’
She was still hiding in the bushes, and Koushi simply held his hand out to her in return, seemingly on-the-spot deciding to explain further as she took it.
‘It’s Tohru’s bike. He’s a good driver, you know? Gets places fast when you need him.’ he explained, blowing a goodbye kiss to the other boy (who was already halfway back to his vehicle).
‘But — you, young lady, look like you’ve been through a lot today, haven’t you. No matter what, I’m proud of course, but do you want to talk about it on the way to your place? I’ll buy you whatever you want.’
Koushi was kind and understanding as always — there was no disputing it at all.
But… Hitoka wanted to push her luck just a little, as she knew it would be a difficult night for her once the realization of her rejection properly sank in more and more.
‘Koushi… may I- we, may we go to your house? Together? Please? I don’t want to go back home tonight, my mother is going to ask too many questions and I’m not good at hiding when I’m sad and-‘
Warmth — sudden, but perhaps the strongest Hitoka had felt it in quite some time. A very welcome feeling, straight from the bear hug Koushi had wrapped her in in response.
‘Of course,’ he planted a kiss to the top of Hitoka’s head, yet another act she would permit from him and only him — especially because she knew he meant it essentially platonically, in a way that would never serve to hurt her.
I love him…
～✧～
The two were sitting on Koushi’s bed together — more accurately, Hitoka astraddle on his lap, using him as a literal shoulder to cry on, as Koushi held her.
He was warm, and kind, and for some reason smelled like cookies(?), but those things (save the cookies, usually) were generally givens for her best friend, and weren’t worth thinking about much — instead, Hitoka tried her best to give her account of the story of her very first, and very fresh, heartbreak.
‘…So… Takeda-sensei said we were free to go after telling us about some plans he had changed for our schedule…’
‘Mhm…?’
‘Oh my god, Koushi, I messed up so badly and I don’t know what I’m going to do… I- she obviously won’t talk to me again, and I should just quit the team and die because if she doesn’t talk to me I won’t learn from her and I need to do that because once she graduates I’ll be the only manager and-‘
‘Poor girl… breathe, okay? You’re looking a little blue in the face, you know.’ Koushi sympathetically patted her head softly.
‘I’m feeling a little blue, too…’
‘I know, I know, I understand. Just try your best to tell me what happened, and save your opinions for after, okay?’ he squeezed her a little harder, seemingly so as to provide a reassuring presence.
He’s like what I imagine those protagonists in shoujo manga end up with... Something like that.
‘I asked Shimizu-senpai if we could talk… and I told her that I had a crush on her, not that I loved her, but that I had a crush, because I don’t— didn’t love her exactly, not love love yet…’
‘And…?’
I wouldn’t be right here with you in your room if she had answered positively, you know…
‘And… she said no. That she was flattered, and she was wondering if I felt that way, but it would be best if we stayed friends, especially because she’s my senpai… even though she doesn’t really like guys…’
‘And what did you say?’
‘I thanked her and said I still wanted to be friendsl, and ran away. To the front of the school. Then I called you once I was ready to talk. …And now we’re… here.’
‘That’s it?
‘…’
‘You’re leaving something out, aren’t you…’
Perceptive as always.
‘She said I was cute…’
‘Oh-ho, that’s something, isn’t it, my dear Hitomin!?’
‘Mmm… I think she was just being nice, Koushi. Shimizu-senpai isn’t interested, so it doesn’t matter in the end, right?’ she lifted her face out of the boy’s neck, inadvertently just in time for him to sweetly boop her on the nose.
‘Nope,’ he gently rebutted, ‘you’re plenty cute, Hitoka.’
First name…
‘You… you really mean it, senpai?’
‘Of course I do! You know that I always say things how they are, and the facts say that you, my dear Hitomin, are very cute.’
He’s always kind to me, but rarely ever this much. He must be really worried…
Without knowing how to respond with her words, Hitoka simply nuzzled into Koushi’s chest a little, pinning him down onto the bed with the little strength she could use, so that she was lying on top of him. She was sure it would look suspicious to a hypothetical nosy onlooker, but… she knew Koushi would understand she didn’t mean anything unsavory by it — it was just how they were.
Hitoka really just needed warmth and comfort to take her out of her deep disappointment, and knew it was something her best friend could provide — he was someone who would never and could never hurt her, for a variety of reasons, after all.
And there was nothing wrong with it, even if others got the wrong idea from time to time, like Shimizu-senpai did before.
Nothing wrong at all…
‘I love you, Koushi…’
‘Two love confessions in one day!? Someone’s a little brazen, huh?’ he mock-widened his eyes, laughing at his own poking fun at his best friend.
‘You… know… what I mean… I think… I hope… it’s e-embarrassing, anyways, so please don’t make me say it again…’
‘Sorry, I didn’t catch that?’
‘Please don’t make me s— does hearing me say such a thing really make you that happy, Koushi?’
‘Maybe,’ he grinned up at her.
He’s the worst…
‘I l-love you. Koushi-senpai. You know how I mean it.’
‘And I love you very much as well, my dearest Hitomin.’
~✧~
(end)
I wonder if you were thinking they wouldn't get together...? I'm curious!!
A 'rebound spike' is a type of shot in volleyball where you send the ball right into the blockers' arms, just so your team can rebound the ball and get another three chances to sett up an attack. You might think the way Hitoka acts towards Koushi is something a bit more than what best friends may do, and that could be true, buuuut it's not something that's meant to be unsavory on either ends. So, her flocking to him for comfort is out of love, yes, but it's not a 'rebound relationship' in the traditional sense!
I liked being subversive in Hitoka's hopes not coming true here -- she has people to support her, so I'm sure she'll be fine, and honestly? Much better for it in the end! As cute as it would have been to write her with Shimizu-senpai... it just wasn't in the cards, you know? I guess I'm a little bit more of a shipper of Hitoka and Koushi than anything, but their relationship is very ill-definable in my opinion. I like relationship dynamics like that ehehe. They just love each other, and... that's all it is, and that's fine, you know? (Don't worry, Tohru understands! It's not something that'd threaten his much more serious relationship with Koushi at all~.)
...I might come up with a better title later, LOL. Please let me know if any parts were lacking / could be improved upon, or just if you enjoyed this! Thank you for reading~.
A 'rebound spike' is a type of shot in volleyball where you send the ball right into the blockers' arms, just so your team can rebound the ball and get another three chances to sett up an attack. You might think the way Hitoka acts towards Koushi is something a bit more than what best friends may do, and that could be true, buuuut it's not something that's meant to be unsavory on either ends. So, her flocking to him for comfort is out of love, yes, but it's not a 'rebound relationship' in the traditional sense!
I liked being subversive in Hitoka's hopes not coming true here -- she has people to support her, so I'm sure she'll be fine, and honestly? Much better for it in the end! As cute as it would have been to write her with Shimizu-senpai... it just wasn't in the cards, you know? I guess I'm a little bit more of a shipper of Hitoka and Koushi than anything, but their relationship is very ill-definable in my opinion. I like relationship dynamics like that ehehe. They just love each other, and... that's all it is, and that's fine, you know? (Don't worry, Tohru understands! It's not something that'd threaten his much more serious relationship with Koushi at all~.)
...I might come up with a better title later, LOL. Please let me know if any parts were lacking / could be improved upon, or just if you enjoyed this! Thank you for reading~.