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Right back to politics. Dave took a swig of his beer before answering. "Yeah, most humans don't tend to fight for fun. Mostly to settle disputes, one way or another. Sometimes it's some drunk guys in a bar punching each other, sometimes it's large-scale warfare where thousands of people shoot...

Dave chuckled, raising his eyebrows. "One of those worlds, huh?" He took a sip of his drink. Humans as myths. Good to see the universe wasn't entirely upside-down and actual myths were, in fact, still completely nuts. "Yeah. I'm a human. No, we don't have laser eyes. Two legs, two arms...

"Dave," he said. "Tricky? That a nickname, or do people have names like that in your universe? You're, uh... full Pokémon, right? Not a human?"

Dave glanced at the Fennekin as she took a seat. "Sorry, your name was...?"

Dave smirked. "Well, since it's free if you finish it, the restaurant's strongly incentivized to make the bowls too big for anyone to finish. They want you to pay for the food, so they're going to make it too big for almost anyone. If most people could finish it, they'd go out of business." The...

Dave looked down at the Fennekin. What was her name again? God. "Eh, sure? Why not."

Dave sipped his beer at a table in the full curry restaurant, waiting for his food. The waiters had tried very hard to sell him the Great Curry Bowl Challenge, which as far as he could tell was some combination of obvious scam and excuse for the God Squad's Snorlax to eat for free. He'd just...

I should probably log the three hours of writing work I've done before I forget about it entirely.

Squiggly happily disappeared into the lump. "Everything good?" Dave asked; the lump wiggled enthusiastically, but then stilled, without doing so again. "Well, okay." He could feel some psychic echo of giddy joy from within the lump. Who was he to question it at this point? "Well, I guess that's...

"You sure?" Dave tilted his head. "Whatever, fine. Wiggle a bunch if you want out." He pushed his useless lump towards Squiggly. If these were basically Pokéballs for shades, did this technically make him a trainer?

Dave looked at Squiggly once again. "Well, let me know if you ever want to get into one of those, I guess." He paused. "If I let you out, I'm not carrying you on my head. Deal?" He opened Squiggly's container, pulling out an Oran Berry to give him, still watching him closely. "Maybe you should...

God, his fucking obnoxious emoticons. If this was actually the creator of this universe and not Soda being a dick, maybe they should think twice about saving it. [Scotch > Pop]: Cool. Thanks. He put his badge away. "Well, 'Arceus' says he's doing fuck-all because it's all a distortion but...

[Scotch > Pop]: Well, I don't recall saying anything of the sort, so that's a fail grade on the infallibility. Did you find Brisa and Starr, or are you just taking your time fucking around on your badge a bit first?

Dave stared at the badge. "Wh--" He narrowed his eyes towards Soda, who was busily tapping at his own badge, but the holographic interface showed some kind of game (...was that Flappy Bird?), not the messaging app. Not that he couldn't make it look like he was playing a game while actually doing...

Oh, of course Arceus was out there personally searching for Starr and Brisa. Just eager to help these two particular people. Why didn't they just fucking call God for every problem. Not that he'd believe this was really Arceus and not Soda's illusions (fucking Christ, Pop, it was practically a...

Dave narrowed his eyes at Karat. "...A Pokéball? Is that what you were going to say?"

Dave let out a burst of laughter as the Mudkip waltzed in and barely paused before throwing insults at Karat. The balls on that kid, huh? But then... "Pop, huh. Pop. So you think he created the universe? Has he always been so friendly and approachable?"

Dave snorted. "Yeah, uh, they're not very old tales. Mewtwo, the definitely real superweapon genetically engineered from the definitely real Mew by the government, hidden at a top-secret military facility, something something aliens, Big Brother is watching us, the deep state wants to...

Dave blinked, looking between Chip and Soda. "I'm sorry, a Mewtwo?" He let out a disbelieving chuckle. "Are you serious? Fucking Mewtwo?"

Dave glanced at Squiggly. This whole thing still gave him the creeps, to be honest. Could they get out? Even if they were drawn to it, did that actually mean it was good? Flies were drawn to Venus flytrap plants, for fuck's sake. Even if they felt great in there, technically, if you locked a...