Search results

Reviewed 26 years ago.

Hey there! I'm here for Catnip, reviewing chapter one. First, some live reactions/line comments: Minor thing, but the past tense of lie is lay. laid is the past tense of to lay, i.e. to lay something else somewhere. I'm pretty sure you want "fell closed"? Intriguing opening! It definitely...

"Oh, cool, you're sure. Of course you are." A cloying scent sent an unnatural feeling of calm through him, and Dave struggled against its pull. He wanted to tell them they were fucking naïve. But what else to expect? They were a literal goddamn kid. "Look, stay away from him when we go up there...

Dave was silent, a taste of bile in his mouth. He glanced at his badge for a response for the umpteenth time, but there was nothing. Whatever Chip had by now back at the lab had better be good. He was going to fucking strangle him if this turned out to be another waste of time.

"Yeah, I fucking know we're not going to magically fix him with friendship and hope," Dave snapped. He was back to staring at the sky, at the pieces of the moon rearranging themselves. Soda had the power to just do that. No big deal. Did he have to rebuild the cannon, or would that be back too...

Dave looked at Bahamut. “Great. Yeah, we were all waiting for your expert opinion. Local genocide god murder advocate has opinions on the sanity of a guy he’s never fucking talked to. What could go wrong.”

[Scotch > SodaG]: Look, he was in the process of firing the world-ending ca [Scotch > SodaG]: Hold on, it’s pulling itself back together. What the fuck. Dave stared up at the moon. So Prime was still up there. Tenacious fucker. Had the blast even put a dent in him? Maybe he was weakened enough...

Dave stared up at the shattered moon. The whole thing, just… blown to pieces. He clenched his jaw and exhaled, looking away. Wasn’t like there would’ve been anything left of Soda to salvage anyway. Died trying to end the fucking world. Good riddance. (If he was even dead. Wasn’t he some kind of...

No answer before the moon was— shit. He rushed forward, gritting his teeth. “Soda, wait!” Why the fuck would he hear him? He was on the fucking moon. If there was no kind of response or sign immediately he was hightailing it through that portal.

The sight of the moon, even closer than earlier, made Dave's skin crawl. Soda was up there, right now, deteriorating. What did the moon moving closer mean? Was Soda getting impatient, wondering what the holdup was? Had he been watching their fight, somehow? Bahamut was suggesting they have Eien...

Of course Diyem just destroyed the goddamn parasite. Good thing they had two of them already back at the lab. Owen was falling, and Dave sprinted towards where he was hurtling down, calling forth Radiance to shield him and cushion his fall. Maybe. Probably his weight would crush the barriers...

Time for chapter five. Get ready for some things to start Happening... just as soon as the first scene is done describing utterly unimportant things in tedious detail. You really need to know exactly what buttons Mark presses to set up his Pokédex, guys. Chapter 5: The Lake of Purity The...

Dave uses Ruin (freeze) on Eien.

Chapter four! In which things get even wilder. Chapter 4: Cleanwater City After ten minutes or so, Mark and Charmander arrived at the Cleanwater City Pokémon Center, panting. Mark went straight up to the bell on the desk and hammered it with his hand until a red-haired nurse dressed in...

One moment they were walking into the light, the next... they were facing a gigantic swirling monstrosity with Diyem and the two big dogs. "Holy shit," Dave muttered. This was Diyem's girlfriend? No accounting for taste. More importantly, she was the source of this storm, and all of this...

Dave's heart took another lurch as Mia's eyes flickered out entirely, but then her normal green was back, as if nothing had happened. Mia cocked her head. "She's gone. I'm just me again. That was interesting." Dave blinked at her, wary. That was it? Eien'd just... released her? What was... Had...

Dave let out a shaky snort. "Therapy? It's... don't get your hopes up, Mia." He released her slowly. Indeed, the core was just... gone. She looked like her normal self, but a little more solid. No core. "The fuck do you mean you don't..." Was this what the hatching was? Just, hatching into...

Something broke through the dark haze that had enveloped everything. A light touch. He whirled blindly, teeth bared to attack. He took a sharp, gasping breath. "Mia?" He blinked hard. She was...? He reached out a paw to touch her. Solid. Real. Dave pulled her into a hug, clung to her...

Dave was limping, shaking, one of his hind legs numb and pulsing, but they were out. They were okay. Not being followed. He took a deep, shuddering breath, then another. Mia pointed towards a light down the road. This was all some kind of illusory hellscape, who knew if going anywhere would get...

Dave's heart hammered in his chest, his injured cheek throbbing with pain, muscles tense in anticipation of another sharp stab of agony that'd send him crumpling to the ground. But none came. Shots tore through the air, each bang nauseating, but by some miracle none of them hit. The man he'd...