The AI squeezed his wrist gently. "You seem like you want my approval. Is that correct?"
"I don't know...I don't know..." Arven murmured. "Maybe I am. God knows I've asked Celebi enough times, and it's a neutral party. It doesn't have a stake in this, and it's a divine spirit. And still it doesn't feel enough." He shook his head, the arm still behind it wobbling from the movement, and drew his knees up as if he meant to stand but remained where he was. "Yeah, I think maybe I am. Your approval, your forgiveness, your condemnation, whatever you'd say to me. I shouldn't be this obsessed with what you think just because you look like a man who ruined both our lives."
"I--"
"Yeah, you're not alive. I know. Whatever you call it, our existences."
Another gentle squeeze. "I was going to say that I can't give any of those things. It was your decision, and you've already gotten this far with it. Clearly you made that decision a long time ago."
Arven scoffed. "You'd just have to go and say that, wouldn't you?" His voice was thick again, with a choke to the back of it. "Here I am trying to get you to stop living, whatever, existing, in his shadow and I can't get out of it myself." He fumbled around with his left hand, grabbing for the AI's and squeezing it as hard as he could. "And I'm going to have to leave, and then Celebi will leave, and I'm going to be alone, and you're going to be alone, and you may never see another person for as long as you exist, and I'm never going to get that jerk out of my head, and--" and he stomped his feet but still didn't stand, and covered his face with his other arm, and he broke down sobbing out the tears he had been holding back for the past several minutes.
The AI shifted to his knees and leaned over to Arven, saying nothing but offering his hand. But Arven rolled away from him, curling into a ball and drawing both arms over his head, trying to pull in staggered breaths to steady his shaking. The AI remained where he was, arm outstretched, waiting for the young man to take the lead.
Celebi shook its head, in apology or sadness or some indiscernible emotion felt only by mythical fairies, it was impossible to tell.
After either too much or two little time had passed, Arven's unsettled breathing returned to normal, and he sat up and turned towards his companions. "I'm sorry," he said with an unusual flatness, fists balled in the dirt beneath him. "That's happening more and more lately. When I go back, it should get better."
The AI drew closer, brushing his lab coat aside so as not to impede his grounded movement, and hesitantly raised a hand to Arven's shoulder. The young man didn't react. "Arven, you came here to ask me to return with you, and as of now I cannot do that. I wish to continue my research here, my grand adventure, and I would need to augment my body so that I can leave Area Zero, a process that will take an as-yet unknown amount of time to achieve."
"I know, I know..." After a moment between them, he brought his hand to cover the AI's. "I feel like ever since I got here, everything has been moving in circles. We talk, I break down, we hug, we talk, I break down again...it keeps going."
"Brave Arven..." The AI smiled, turning his attention to Celebi. "Arven said that he can stay as long as you permit. How long is that?"
The fairy rose up and swirled around the both of them, giving no solid answer before flitting off.
"Heh...I guess that means it wants to stay for a while. I wonder if it's been here before," Arven mused.
"Perhaps I'll see it again in the future, even without the Time Flute." The AI cocked his head and smiled sympathetically. "Arven, I recounted what I've told you for a reason."
"And what's that?"
"You understand now why I cannot return with you. I may make use of the Time Flute at some point, but as of now, I am unable to predict that decision. I cannot say either way at this point." He met Arven's eyes. "I will always treasure the Time Flute no matter what, not because it is a mythical artifact, but because you gave it to me."
Arven glanced over where Celebi had gone but couldn't see it. He wanted to say something rude, something that would create some barrier between himself and the AI, and a comparasion between the flute and a child's crude handprint drawing came to his mind, but he had to bite it away. He wanted to hear what the man would say. After all this time, after every dream and nightmare he had to pursue to make their meeting happen, he couldn't fall back on his old ways.
"Brave Arven, what I treasure most is our time. Above everything else, I'm grateful I could see you even once more. And however long Celebi grants you, even if you could remain here for years, it would still be limited." His lower lip trembled, smile gone. Though he was incapable of producing tears, for everything else, his grief and regret was as plain as that of any human. "Arven...there is something I want to tell you."
"Anything."
"Well..." For a moment he looked away, eyes flashing blue again before resuming their normal brown. "I realized some time ago, when speaking to you and Juliana during your quest, that even if I never did meet you in person, I knew you well through the professor's memories. And...I realized that I had come to love you, as a parent would."
Arven sniffled, staring at the ground. "You'd probably be a better dad than he was."
The AI pulled Arven close in another hug, threading a hand in the young man's hair to rest secure on the back of his head. "You deserve an unsullied future. One of the brightest days, of the grandest adventures. You are bold and wonderful, and you are far better than you believe yourself to be."
The young man shook his head, finding the embrace indulgent and overwhelming and at once everything he wanted. "I can't think in those terms. I can't think of myself as a success. You said that I helped save Paldea but I couldn't even save my own father, and when I had the ability to do so, I still made the decision not to. And that's going to sit with me the rest of my life."
"Arven. You cannot save everyone."
"Then let me save you!" he protested, pushing away from the AI at arm's length and scrambling to his feet. "Come back with me! I'm sure you can modify yourself to survive outside Area Zero there. And the machine doesn't work any more, like I said. Clavell sent a big group down there to make sure of that. You could meet him in person like you wanted!" He gestured frantically, randomly, broadly. "You could see Paldea, and you could live at the lighthouse with me and Mabostiff, and I'm sure you'd love to see the world, and everyone would think you're great. You're a hero, after all. You did way more to save Paldea than I did. A-a-and if you love me like a father, then you'd want a chance to live that out, right?"
The AI remained where he was, kneeling position and bowed head giving him the presentation of utmost regret. When he looked up at last, his sad smile confirming what he had already said. "Arven, again, I must refuse. I may come to change my mind, but you knew that was a possibility. That was why you diverted to get the Time Flute, after all."
Arven sniffled and took a step back, arms falling to his sides. "I know..."
"When I say no, understand that I may choose to remain here, even with the Time Flute. However, I cannot say for certain now. But, Arven, no matter what the future holds..." His smile brightened. "...Know that I'll forever be grateful that I met you."
"There's really nothing I can say to change your mind, is there?"
"Arven, know that right now, as I am, I am happy. I'm happy where I am, seeing the future I dreamed of, exploring Area Zero, researching the creatures of this distant era." That smile had broadened, and his eyes flashed blue longer than before. "Someday I'll be able to leave here and see the outside world at last, with my own eyes, not limited to a remote screen. And that...that will be the second happiest day of my existence, behind only today."
Arven drew in a deep, shuddering breath.
"And I know that happiness will not last. But, Arven," The AI drew a hand up to wipe away a tear from Arven's cheek, "neither will your sadness. You will find joy in your life. You already have, haven't you?"
"Then why does it always go away?" Arven whispered, having meant to answer at a normal volume. "Why do I feel so bad all the time? It's like I wasn't meant to be happy..."
"Of course you were...oh, my boy, of course you were..." His expression fell into deep concern, and his hand trailed down to cup under Arven's chin. "Don't ever doubt that."
Arven backed up, away from the touch, standing tense and shaking. "Seeing that face, hearing that voice saying those things, I can't take it."
The AI nodded slowly, knowingly. "As much as I resemble him, however, I am not your father. I spoke his words before and made it clear that they were his, and I have spoken my own as well. Right now, I speak to you only as myself, something I could not do before." His smile returned, the same soft expression he had displayed when he had taken Arven's hand the first time. "I am not him. And you know this. But I understand that emotions make it far more complex."
"Then how do you deal with them? How does it seem like you understand emotions better than humans do?" Arven wiped at his eyes with the palm of his hand.
"I'm not certain that I do. I often find myself confused with what I feel. I know, for reasons I explained earlier, that an Iron Jugulis does not view me as a threat. And yet every time I see one, I feel an urge to flee, to conceal myself." He gestured to the depths below. "I know that if I remain far from a dropoff, I will not fall. And yet I grow apprehensive if I look down, even if I am at a safe distance. Logic and emotion are not enemies, as humans seem to believe."
"Yeah but that's just self preservation. If you get damaged, there's no one to fix you, and there's got to be some injury even the crystals can't help you with."
"Maybe so. But beyond that. I do not understand many of his memories. His emotions often conflict with the events. He would perceive things contrary to the stimuli at hand. I believe you may call it...delusional. Paranoid, perhaps. And so I don't understand. How he could dismiss the safety of an entire region, even the world beyond it, for the sake of his paradise, but still have compassion within him to give his life for another. How he could think nothing of the destruction he would have caused, but still harbor deep love for you." The AI shook his head. "He did love you. I know that for a fact. It was hooded with delusion and obsession, but he did love you."
"He sure didn't show it," Arven muttered. "You hugging me one time is more affection than he showed me in years."
"I know. That is the conflict that evokes the most confusion in me. To love someone and treat them so poorly...and yet it is my understanding that this behavior is commonplace among humans."
Arven looked away and wrapped his arms tight to his chest. "Yeah, it is. Mom left too."
"I know. Arven..." The AI took a step forward. "Even if we do see each other again, I would hope by then we have both advanced out of the professor's shadow. That we are able to find that spark that fuels us to seek out the fullness of existence."
"I feel like he's always going to be looming over me. No matter what I do. But..." The young man turned back but didn't face the AI just yet. "...he said I looked more like my mother. When you see yourself, you're only going to see him. I can't even imagine what that must be like."
The AI chuckled, something Arven hadn't thought he was able to do. "I am me. I am not him, even if I was built in his image. I look like him, but I look like myself. I sound like him, but I sound like myself. To me, it is only as important as I make it." He paused. "...Although perhaps having no one else around is a factor. If I was mistaken for him regularly, perhaps I would have a different view of that. But now, in this isolated corner of the future, I have no such qualms about bearing his likeness."
"Is that another reason you're staying?"
"No, simply addressing your point. I apologize if it came across that way. I do not wish to mislead you any further."
Neither of them spoke for a minute or so until Arven approached and took the AI's hand. "You were getting at something earlier, weren't you? About the future."
"Yes, I'm glad you caught that. I was unsure when an appropriate time would be to re-approach the subject." He seemed to relax a bit, and gave Arven's hand a squeeze. "I believe that, should we meet again, we must do so on a better footing. That we must be able to find our own ways in this world first. That we have to exist on our own."
"We have to learn how to be our own people."
"Yes. And so, I will take this opportunity to speak to you about your father. Anything you wish to know. Although I do caution you that you may find some answers potentially upsetting."
Arven sighed. "...I feel like, right now, there's nothing I want to know. But I also know that if I don't ask something, I'll never get another chance. Or I might, you don't know yet...." He sniffled. "But even if you do come back, you're telling me you won't want to talk about him."
"I may. That's another thing I do not yet know. I wouldn't refuse you that information, regardless."
"Well..." Arven slowly, smally, swung their hands in the air, only a few inches to and fro. "I wouldn't want to make you do anything you didn't want to. He did that to you too much."
"That is kind of you. But in this time we have right now, I am encouraging you to ask."
The young man closed his eyes tight, tighter still, until he saw bursts of white. "I...where is he buried?"
The AI nodded slowly. "...I will show you. Let us talk further on the way."