Pokémon Exquisite Corpse 2025: CYOA

[The Walrein]

Welcome to Thousand Road's first CYOA Exquisite Corpse! In a twist on the exquisite corpse formula, writers ended their segments with a choice between two options, like in a classic choose your own adventure gamebook. Then the story would be passed on to two authors, each receiving a different option to follow in addition to the final two sentences before the decision point.

Which of the seven endings will you reach? Are the outcomes of your choices more or less logical than a Give Yourself Goosebumps book or that one Animorphs special? Only you can decide!

Spoiler: List of Authors in Alphabetical Order

BestLizard
canisaries
Chibi Pika
Coffeegrigus
Flyg0n
icomeanon6
LeapingLichen
NebulaDreams
Negrek
Sinderella
Starlight Aurate (wrote two segments)
Umbramatic

#1:​

Wind howls in your ears, and the wind stings your face as you walk along the shore. Waves gently lap the sand, and to your left, sharp cliffs protrude into the sky. The salty air fills your lungs, the cold stings your skin. But your rather dashing fur coat is plenty warm enough to keep you comfortable.

Brann's little red form walks before you, his footprints leaving a trail in the sand. The Magby totters along, still learning how to balance on his own two feet just three weeks after hatching. You had found his egg during one of your brave, daring adventures into the volcanic fields, and your irresistible thirst for adventure had incited you to see what sort of creature would hatch from it! Brann had thus far been happy to stay with you inside your fabulously rustic home, lying buried in the sand, soaking in the heat from the volcanoes laying beneath the island. But lately he had waited impatiently at the door, as if there was something outside he wanted to see. Evidently, he had inherited your heroic sense of adventure!

Your keen eyes scan the shore stretching in front of you, and you pause as you make out... something stirring on the beach. It's too far away for you to distinguish its shape. Some sort of unconscious creature? A washed-up boat?

The thing lying on the beach starts to move, but just as you're about to bravely investigate the oddity, Brann interrupts your adventure by turning left and scrambling up the sloping crags.

A: You leave Brann the Magby and heroically investigate what potentially-fearsome adversity has washed up on shore. GO TO #2
B: You responsibly choose to remain a faithful, loving trainer, and follow Brann the Magby up the crags. GO TO #3

Spoiler: Author

Starlight Aurate (1st Segment)

 

[The Walrein]

#2:​

You begin to approach the oblong, metallic object. Gregory follows along without hesitation, but Brann calls after you from above.

“Don’t go near it, Frederick! It’s a bad omen!”

You can’t judge Brann for his superstitious attitude. It’s only natural for baby Pokémon to be frightened by the unfamiliar, especially here on the shore within sight of the forbidden Colossus. But as for you, a proper Golduck, it would be unbecoming to ignore such a mystery as this. You stride forward, watching the thing as it sporadically rocks back and forth. Is it perhaps trying to right itself?

“What do you think, Gregory?” you ask your faithful companion.

“Gregory! Ree, ree, greg. Greg!”

Gregory, being a Human, can’t answer your question in language, of course, but you usually get the idea. In this case, Gregory is more or less saying that it’d be best to stay on guard. You nod.

You have now crossed the sand, and the object lies in front of you, continuing to twitch. You notice what appears to be a circular hatch, flush with the exterior and held in place with a few bolts. This looks like a job for your trusty Human.

“Gregory, use Tools!”

“Gregory!”

Gregory searches through his toolbox for the appropriate wrench, and soon finds it. You’re glad to have an Engineering-type Human. What he lacks in the Attack stat, he makes up for with his fine motor skills and ability to fix the printer when it’s on the fritz. In a matter of minutes, his task is complete, and the hatch opens with a loud hiss of air.

To your utter amazement, a wild Human emerges from the now-open object. It’s hard to tell from its bulky, outlandish attire, but you believe it’s an adult male by its height and facial features. It steps heavily onto the beach, panting and looking about itself in bewilderment. For your part, you are little less confused, but you maintain a stoic expression and confident posture.

You speak to it calmly. “Easy, Human. Nobody’s going to hurt you.”

“Gregory!”

At the sound of your voices, it staggers backward, eyes darting between you and Gregory. Then, its eyes cease to dart about, fixing instead on something in the distance. You look in the same direction, wondering what has arrested its attention. You see it: It is the forbidden Colossus, towering as always over the dunes, torch in hand.

The wild Human falls to its knees, pounds its fists into the sand, and screams, “You maniacs! You blew it up!”

Words fail you. A talking Human? This is far beyond your experience.

Gregory stares apprehensively at the strange, distraught creature. You, meanwhile, turn again to the old, familiar Colossus, wondering what the connection between it and the arrival of this mysterious being could be.

A: Call the gang together to get to the bottom of this. GO TO #4
B: Order Gregory to attack—better safe than sorry. GO TO #5

Spoiler: Author

icomeanon6

 

[The Walrein]

#3:​

Running behind Blann, you ignore the flap of weight on the sand. The breeze tickles your ears, and the weight of what was moving on the sand felt faint.

You needed to focus on the rocky hill; sure, it was easy, just like any trail. You try to follow your red and yellow friend as he gets over the rocky path.

Rocks always get Blann excited. Reaching up to avoid losing a friend in the awkward scramble, you pull yourself up on one of the rocks along the trail, and you shout to Blann to wait up.

You look up and see Blann stopped in their tracks and waving for you from afar. Smoking oran berry from a pile, and taking a big gulp of it, "Well, someone's going to be angry, come on, Blann, let's leave."

Don't want to be attacked by Blann's consequences. You grab onto their free hand, dragging Blann away.

Your feet scraped some of the shells mixed with the gravel. Blahnn's tail wag as your magby looks up at you with stars in their eyes, wanting to lead in front of your hike. Which made you let go, and not because there was a trail you had to scramble on that would be hard to do while holding someone.

Looking around for a bit, it was a lot steeper than you thought it was going to be. Seeing rocks upward and outward on the compact gravel bedding, you find a steady trail that your Magby was running across, excitedly. Jumping up and down to try to get their arm up to push themselves onto a rock trail.

Blan gets farther and farther, immediately sprinting to the left behind a giant rock on the trail. And hear a Clefairy cry.

A Clefable slaps a Magby - your Magby unprompted. Clefairies being this far out on a trail would be surprising if it wasn't much of a trail for a mountain than a mountain itself.

The sound of a Gengar laugh appears in the shadow, and Blann froze. Without thinking for another second, you run to Brahnn and shield him from a shadow ball.

Accidentally tumbling down the Clefairy, aggravating them to be quite hostile.

There was something in the patch of rocks that shone and made you think carefully about what to do next.

A moonstone and a broken cliff.

A: Throw the moonstone at the Gengar. GO TO #6
B: Throw the moonstone off a cliff. GO TO #7

Spoiler: Author

Coffeegrigus

 

[The Walrein]

#4:​

You knew you had to call.... The Gang.

One phone call later they arrived - a blond young man in an orange ascot, a redhead girl in purple, a bespectacled girl in orange, a scruffy teen in green, and a Houndoom. Gregory looked at you oddly.

"These are our guys?"

You told him they were dependable, if... Eccentric.

"Sure I guess?"

"Well, Gang," stated the blond. "We'll have to get to the bottom of what this creature is!"

The Creature howled and moaned, moving left and right rapidly to avoid engagement. You turned to Colossus, your Claydol.

"You said you can detect something familiar about this creature, right?"

Colossus nodded.

"If you work together with The Gang, do you think you can subdue it?"

Another nod.

"Alright let's get to it."

"Come on gang, let's get 'im!" yelled the scruffy teen.

They gave chase to the monster, pursuing it through hallways and corridors and doors and doors and doors and doors. Finally, Colossus cornered the beast mid-chase with a Psychic hold.

"Now!" shouted the redhead.

"I'm on it!" barked the Houndoom.

He launched a Fire Blast at the creature, knocking it to the floor. Within seconds they had it tied up.

"Huh. They are good," muttered Gregory.

"They're veteran mystery solvers," you stated.

"Well let's find out who this really is!" shouted the blond.

He tugged at the creature's face, pulling off a mask. All gasped.

"Steven Stone!"

You expect Steven Stone to go on a "I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids and your Houndoom" rant. But his face immediately turned to one of panic.

"Wait!" said Steven Stone. "I can explain!"

You realized you had a dilemma.

A: Hear Steven Stone out. GO TO #8
B: Turn Steven Stone in to the authorities. GO TO #9

Spoiler: Author

Umbramatic

 

[The Walrein]

#5:​

“Attack!” you shout. Gregory the Feraligatr from Luminose City runs full on to the distraught, horrific beings, their shrill cries growing louder in fear as they begin to run away from you.

Realizing something’s wrong, you order “Stop!” to your water-type. He looks around confused, before realizing all the strange monstrosities are shivering in the corner.

You approach slowly - very slowly - and kneel down before them. You offer a hand out. It sniffs it, before gently accepting it.

“You’re not really here to hurt us?” you ask. The monster shakes its head. Your Feraligatr says “Sorry” in its pokespeak, rubbing the back of its neck.

You look to the others. Indeed, despite their terrifying appearances, there’s a look of fear and worry in their eyes. Knowing you’re not a threat, they start coming out and surround you, getting close and all sniffing you.

“How’d you get like this?” you ask.

They all look at each other. The tallest one, who also looks the oldest, starts heading towards a crack in the wall. The others follow behind it, and you do too, realizing they’re leading you.

It’s a dark, cramped tunnel, and it goes on for many long minutes. You can hardly see in front of you, although the noises of the monsters still guide your way. Soon it opens up to a chamber. In the middle is a Giratina with a broken leg. It doesn’t answer anything on its own, at least not yet.

The others get on their knees and start worshipping the wounded Giratina. You can feel a mighty aura come from them. You…

A: Bow down and start worshipping fervently. GO TO #10
B: Kiss Giratina. GO TO #11

Spoiler: Author

BestLizard

 

[The Walrein]

#6:​

You throw the Moonstone at the Gengar. Despite the rumours you heard that a Gengar is just an evil Clefable, the Moonstone doesn’t seem to have any effect. In fact, the Gengar seems very pissed off with you, as anyone would if you threw a heavy rock at their face.

“Ow!” it yells, nursing a comically-large bump on its forehead. “What the hell did you do that for?!”

You throw up your hands. “I thought you’d turn good or something, sorry!”

“Good?! Oh, is that the way you view us Gengar?”

It quirks its nonexistent brows, expecting some sort of answer.

“Um, no, not all Gengar. In fact, one trainer I know has a very nice Gengar on their team!”

“A likely story! And what makes you think I’m an evil Gengar? We’ve literally only just met!”

“Well, you popped out of nowhere, and I’m all alone on this cliff. I had to do something to defend myself.”

“So is that the way you treat any Pokemon just minding their own business? Would you kick a Togepi like a football if they brushed past your feet?”

“No, but Togepi are cute by default.”

“So I’m not cute enough?”

“That and Togepi are defenseless.”

“Tell that to the Togepi who tried to steal my berries the other day.”

“But you can inflict curses on people.”

“Oh, I’ll show you a curse, human!”

It stomps up to you. Before you can run away, it merges with your own shadow. You feel a sudden chill, as if someone’s just dunked a bucket of ice water on you.

“Curses, curses, curses. I got plenty of ‘em for the likes of you. I could make you lose all your hair, or make every cup of coffee you drink lukewarm, or make it so you always have to pee with the lights off. Hell, I could even make you throw yourself off this very cliff!”

You’re unable to move or talk. All you can do is think about the hole you’ve dug yourself and wait for the rightfully-vengeful Gengar to deliver your punishment.

“No, actually, I think I’ll make you choose. I’m feeling merciful, call me schmaltzy. But take this as a warning; next time you throw a Moonstone at a Gengar, it will be the last Moonstone you throw!”

A: “I put the Curse Of Only-Saying-Your-Own-Name-And-By-The-Way-Your-Name-Is-Buttface on you!” GO TO #12
B: “I put the Curse Of Always-Having-To-Run-In-Place-For-The-Rest-Of-The-Day-Otherwise-You-Will-Have-A-Heart-Attack on you!” GO TO #13

Spoiler: Author

NebulaDreams

 

[The Walrein]

#7:​

You stare at the Moon Stone, torn. This was it. The very last Moon Stone in all of Kanto. The object of the war that had been raging for the last decade between Queen Nidoqueen and King Nidoking and their respective tribes. The last remaining way for Nido’s to evolve, and a symbol for their heritage, now turned to an object of war.

You shake your head. Enough blood has been shed, enough lives lost and homes destroyed. This pointless war has gone on long enough. With steady resolve, you pick up the Moon Stone. It is cool to the touch and surprisingly heavy for such a small stone. To think this has caused so much grief.

Then you throw the Moon Stone over the cliff. By your feet, your Skitty purrs approvingly and rubs your leg. Edging closer to the precipice, you peer over the edge. Far below, you can see the shattered remains of the moon stone.

Finally, finally there can be peace.

Satisfied, you step away from the cliff’s edge. You walk slowly back toward the armies of Nido led by their respective leaders, who have stopped fighting. Queen Nidoqueen looks aghast, and King Nidoking looks furious.

“Your war is over!” you cry. “The stone is destroyed and there is nothing left to fight for!”

Silence meets your declaration. You don’t expect cheers. You accept the anger directed at you.

But as you gaze down at the assembled masses of Nido, you begin to feel a tug of guilt. “Was this all worth it?” you murmured.

“Dude no!” One of the Nidorino’s bellowed.

A Nidorina piped up “What the heck bro!”

Angry grumbling came from the crowd, but they began to disperse, a few at the edges sidling away.

Hope flares within you. Now they will all surely leave and the war will end.

“You fool!” King Nidoking roared. “Now you have doomed us all! We can never evolve!”

Queen Nidoqueen seemed lost in thought. Finally, she spoke.”Maybe not. Johto probably has some Moon Stones.”

“Oh bet?” he asked, turning to her. “In that case, let us unite our armies and march into Johto!”

You blink. “Wait what.”

“Allies?” Queen Nidoqueen asked. She offered a claw.

King Nidoking nodded and shook. “Allies. Huzzah!”

They both turn to you. ”Thank you. Your selfless action has brought us together and helped us see that we are stronger together.”

Before you can say more, they bellow out great cries, drawing their Nido armies into one. Then, as you watch from the hill as they march away, united, to overtake a new land and claim a new Moon Stone.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

Flyg0n

 

[The Walrein]

#8:​

"Alright," you said, "let's hear it."

Steven sighed. "You'd better sit down for this."

You sat down on the floor of the cave. It wasn't comfortable.

"Okay, so basically," Steven started, "there's something you should know. You see, there are three major types of rock. Igneous, sedimentary and metamorphic. Igneous rocks are formed through the cooling and solidification of magma or lava. Sedimentary rocks are types of rock formed by the cementation of sediments - that is, particles made of minerals or organic matter - that have been accumulated or deposited on the surface of the earth. Metamorphic rocks --"

"What does this have to do with anything?" you shouted, throwing your hands in the air.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right," Steven said, holding up a hand. "I'm just trying to make you understand that I really, really like rocks. But I don't just like rocks. I like-like rocks."

He gazed at Regirock, hesitating for a while before placing his hand on the giant's arm. "I felt like a freak for so long. I tried to hide it, suppress it, because I knew nothing good would ever come out of embracing it. But I was wrong. I knew that when I met Regirock."

"ÜN ÜN ÜN ÜN," said Regirock tenderly.

Tears welled up in Steven's eyes. "Yes, I know… and I thank you for that." He turned back to you. "There are always going to be people that have preferences that are… different. But as long as they're not hurting anyone, is there really anything wrong with it?"

You took a moment to consider it. A man and a rock-monster together. It seemed strange to you, even depraved, but when you tried to think of a scenario where such a pairing would lead to some kind of disaster, you couldn't picture anything.

"You're right, Mr. Stone," you then said. "I may not understand it, but it isn't my place to say who you can and can't fall in love with, as long as they're over 30 years old and your last common ancestor is from 16 or more generations ago. And considering Regirock is, like, thousands of years old and not human at all, I'd say that clears the requirements."

"But wait," said Melissa, your trusted friend who was always by your side, "Isn't the age gap super problematic?"

"Huh," you said. "Yeah. It is pretty dang problematic, Mr. Stone. I'm sorry, but we're going to have to cancel Regirock now."

Steven's eyes went wide. "What?"

"ÜN ÜN ÜN!" Regirock cried out, and you had a feeling he was saying something about his followers. No, not those guys that worshipped him thousands of years ago, but the followers on his socials.

"Too late," Melissa said. "I already posted a callout thread on X, the Everything App. It's 47 xeets long and doxxes your home address."

"But, Melissa…" you said. "Doesn't Regirock live in… this cave?"

A distant rumbling rapidly grew louder until a horde of angry people arrived and flooded the cave.

"There he is!" someone screamed, pointing at Regirock. "Mods, tear each of his atoms from one another and scatter them across the vast reaches of ever-expanding space, never to reunite!"

They did that.

"No!" Steven screamed as the crowd dispersed.

"It's okay, Mr. Stone," you said, walking over to the champion and placing your hand on his shoulder. "The bad rock-man is gone now. Do you want to go out for some choccy milkshakes?"

"No! You… you killed my one true love! I hate you!"

Melissa shook her head. "The thanks we get for our good deeds…"

"Don't take it personally," you said to your friend. "After all… hurt people… hurt people." You reunited with Melissa and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "Ready to leave?"

"Yeah, let's blow this joint," she said.

You got up on your motorcycles and revved them super loud and then drove out of the cave, leaving Steven to cough and hack from your exhaust fumes. The desert outside was dyed orange by the setting sun. Quite beautiful.

"Well, so ends another day in the productive life of an internet warrior," you shouted over the noise of the motor.

"We're making the world so much better," Melissa shouted back.

"So true, bestie," you shout.

Melissa smiles, but then gasps. "Brian, look out!"

You look in front of you just long enough to see a big, tall rock right there. You crash into it in a deafening explosion, dying instantly.

You see, rocks look out for one another.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

canisaries

 

[The Walrein]

#9:​

You take a third option and turn tail and flee, tearing off down the hallway as the alleged champion shouts after you. As you're about to round a corner, you hear a guttural growl--and a Magmar steps out in front of you. His fists are raised, wreathed in flame, and smoke trickles from his mouth as he glares at you.

But something is familiar about this Magmar...

"Brann?!?" you shout.

Brann lets out a puff of flame as he snarls, generating a rather large fireball in the palm of his right hand. You hear Steven Stone catch up to you.

"Yes, Magmar!" Steven shouts excitedly. "Fight! End it, now!"

"Brann, wait!" you shout, holding up your hands in an effort to placate the Magmar as his fireball grows larger. "Don't you remember your infancy? Remember when you hatched from your egg, and bury in the sand at our house?"

A glint of recognition comes to Brann's eyes, and the flames in the fireball flicker. You seize your opportunity and press forward.

"Remember walking along the shoreline? Remember the volcano, that you used to traverse and explore? You would walk along the beach, breathing in the salty air, and bury yourself in the sand, feeling the life of the volcano flowing into you."

A look of understanding crosses Brann's face, and he lowers his hands as the fireball dies.

"But then," you add in hushed tones, "you were abandoned by a trainer. They left you on your own while they looked at something that washed ashore. Remember?"

Fury crosses Brann's face, and flames gather around his fists once more.

You point to Steven Stone. "That was him."

"WHAT?!" Steven shouts.

"Don't you want revenge, Brann? Then, get him!"

"Oh, that's bullshit! I've never abandoned anyone--I didn't even know you had a name! AAAHHHHH!"

A whirlwind of fire envelops Brann as he charges after Steven. You're about to turn around, washing your hands clean of the whole affair--when the earth starts to shake, and a deep, monstrous bellow echoes up from bellow.

A cave conveniently stands not far from you, and a stream of fire flows out before an S-shaped dragon with tiny wings and big, beefy arms lumbers out.

"TROGDOR!!!"

"Nice going, Steven!" you shout as he and Brann gaze at Trogdor fearfully. "Your screaming woke up Trogdor!"

"Don't pin this on me! You sent your crazy Magmar after me! I can handle this--my steel Pokemon are resistant to dragon types! Go, Metagross!"

But a trickle of worry enters your heart as you watch smoke unfurl from Trogdor's nostrils.

"That won't work," Trogdor says in a deep, stilted voice. "I can't be killed. I will burninate you, just like the other peasants who tried to defeat me."

"I'm not a peasant!" you shout indignantly. "I'm WAY out of their league! They smell, and they're always on fire. I've got a nice fur coat, I shower once a week, and I haven't sustained any third-degree burns since Brann was a Magby!"

"Maybe Trogdor can't be killed," Steven mused, "but I bet he can still be beaten! Metagross, use hypnosis!"

But before Metagross does a thing, Trogdor lets out a burst of flame, and Metagross moans as he is burninated.

"Brann, quick! Tie a rock to Trogdor's wings, and push him over the cliff!" For it just so happened that all of you happened to be standing nearby a cave on top of a cliff that overlooked a turbulent ocean.

As Trogdor is distracted with Metagross, Brann picks up a hefty rock, takes a leap, and lands neatly in the curve on Trogdor's back.

"Hey!" Trogdor growls. He turns, stretching his beefy arms, but like all gym bros, lacks flexibility, and thus cannot reach behind himself to grab Brann.

Brann ties Trogdor's wings using a rope he miraculously found to a large rock and, gracefully leaping off Trogdor's back, pushes the fiend over the cliff.

"YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE LAST OF MEEEE!!!!" Trogdor's voice calls out before it's cut off by a SPLASH!

"Wow..." Steven stone walks over to you, his Metagross safely back in the Pokeball. "You saved our lives! Boy, was I wrong about you!"

But before any further reconciliation can begin, the dreaded woo-woo-woo siren heralds the arrival of several cop cars. Many policemen and women get out, all looking thoroughly grumpy.

"Who woke up the Trogdor?" a moustachioed man with a Chicago accents asks. "There is a strict noise enforcement for a five kilometre radius because it's common knowledge that high volumes will wake him up. Now, who's responsible?"

"It's him!" you shout, pointing at Steven. "He's responsible! He screamed because this Magmar chased after him!"

"Wait--what?!? How was I supposed to know this?!"

"Tell it to the judge when the next time a peasant is burninated is in the news!" the chief says as another officer handcuffs Steven's hands behind his back. Steven continues to gripe and moan as he is escorted into the police car.

"Well, Brann," you say as you watch the cavalcade of police cars depart, "it's nice that things are finally going back to normal. Thank goodness Trogdor gave us an excuse to turn Steven Stone in! Wanna go play some Peasant's Quest? Maybe we can finally get past the Kerrek!"

Brann gives a delighted howl, and the two of you walk home together, arm-in-arm, ready to take on the next adventure.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

Starlight Aurate (2nd Segment)

 

[The Walrein]

#10:​

The Giratina starts being enveloped in a blinding light, as you join in the fervent worship, the area begins to be consumed by the light, the aura from the strong worship and it begins to reshape itself as you and the others see the Giratina in front transform into a newer, sleeker form, as it remolds itself into what is believed to be its original form as the transformation completes, Giratina erupts into a mighty roar, the newly reinvigorated Giratina looking down at your group, curiously until someone yells: "TAKE US HOME GIRATINA!"

It responds in kind by letting everyone on its back, bursting out to the sky, though it dosn't know any of your homes so it starts flying over where you've been and other mystical world like an old chateau, prism tower, it seems you're left to the whims of this cult and Giratina as long as you're with them.

Soon after some time the Giratina starts dropping people off in random places to what it assumes is their "home": a volcano, a tundra, you name it, as it begins dropping people off to these places one by one, it's not too long until it gets to you, as it leaves you at an island archipelago, stranded at some beach out in the middle of nowhere, so it looks like you're gonna have to find your actual way home somehow on this island now, but with all you’ve gone through, it feels nice to just lay down somewhere and think about it later.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

LeapingLichen

 

[The Walrein]

#11:​

"Dude, what are you doing!" Harker called from behind you. "What part of 'worship' don't you understand?"

"What part don't you understand? A little kiss sounds plenty worshipful to me!"

"That's a giant antimatter centipede! It can't be sanitary!" another hooded figure called.

Giratina reared back. "SkweEEERR!" they roared, ragged wings fanning out to block out the sky. The others hurriedly put their heads down and returned to the worshipping.

Black blood still oozed from the wound in Giratina's side, but they hardly seemed to notice, crimson gaze fixed on Dialga, a shadow just barely visible on the other side of the temporal gate. If Giratina went back out there now, another Roar of Time would tear them apart.

Whatever. You weren't expecting anyone else to understand your love. You don't need to try to, either, for small-minded fools like these.

"Do you want Giratina to die?" you snap. "Your prayers aren't working! We need direct action!"

"Could you please be normal about this?" Harker hissed at you from beneath his cowl.

"I didn't join the cult of a dead god to be normal about anything!" you yelled. "Giratina! There's only one force in the universe great enough to save us now. It's the power... of love!"

"Why do your solutions to problems always involve making out with demons??"

"SkweEEEEEEERR!" Giratina's broad head swung down, their golden mask coming closer, and closer...

This was the moment. This was the culmination of everything you'd been working towards all these years. This was the beginning of a new life together for you and Giratina, the one you'd been meant to have all along. You were so elated that you couldn't even care about the gunshot-crack of the temporal gate's seal snapping in the background.

You closed your eyes and prepared yourself...

--

"And this, everyone, is Celestic Town's other most famous statue. Sculptor unknown, it purports to capture the moment just before Giratina returned to plunge the world into darkness, where Dialga froze it eternally in time."

"Excuse me, Mrs. Songford?" A serious young girl near the back of the group put up her hand. "Is the weird person about to kiss Giratina?"

Mrs. Songford sighed. "That remains a matter of considerable academic debate, and nowhere is it discussed more strenuously than in my younger classes. Why don't you have a closer look and decide what the statue means to you? Ten minutes and then we'll head on to the museum."

The class swarmed up around the frozen figures, climbing up on Giratina's tail and poking the human figure as if hoping it might move. It was certainly very lifelike.

The young girl hung back, giving the statues careful consideration. Looking down, giant antimatter centipede. Looking up, disheveled person in a hooded robe.

"Nah," she decided, and ran on to the museum.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

Negrek

 

[The Walrein]

#12:​

I try to make a move, but my brain is too busy trying to process the mile-a-minute words to properly do anything. I have to run, I have to… dodge? But how can you even dodge something like that?! My fate was sealed the moment the words flew from the ghost’s oversized grin.

Gengar is leering at me with an expression of deep self-satisfaction.

“Heh heh, serves you right! Trust me, you’re getting off easy—I could’ve put a way worse curse on you, but this one oughta do.”

I try to open my mouth, to protest that throwing a stone at a ghost shouldn’t do anything (unless we’re talking about the rather niche scenario of throwing a Dusk Stone at a particularly evolution-averse Lampent). But before the words can reach my mouth, I stop myself just in time. That was a close one, I almost said… well, you know.

Gengar floats away cackling incessantly, and no matter how much I stomp my feet and wave my arms, there’s no taking back what just happened. And so I’m left to ponder my fate.

The days turn into weeks, which turn into months. I have to quit my old job, of course. How could I possibly talk business with any clients while under the effects of the curse? I’m also not able to explain my situation to my landlord so it’s only a matter of time before I find myself on the streets, scavenging items and selling them to get by. Until one fateful day…

A certain Gengar floats by, snacking on some berries without a care in the world.

You!

Of course, I don’t say this, it’d only come out as the unfortunate name I was saddled with all those months ago. Instead I wave my arms to get the ghost’s attention before throwing myself to the ground, forehead pressed to the pavement.

Please please please, you have to remove the curse, I’m begging you! I’ll do anything!

Are Gengar telepaths? Well, even if they’re not, surely Gengar must sense the sheer level of remorse radiating from my extreme apology. I slowly lift my eyes to see if the ghost has accepted my display or not to see a wide cheshire grin.

“Oh yeah! I remember you! Buttface! Ha!”

I wince upon hearing the name spoken aloud. The one silver lining to the curse is that, given my inherent inability to explain it to anyone, no one actually knows it’s my name. In fact, I’ve never spoken a word since that day. I’ve never even attempted to learn sign language, for fear that any of my signs would inevitably morph into that name. I’m better off not knowing.

“What’s with that face? You’re acting like you’re under a curse or something. Heh heh!”

I gape at Gengar, at a loss for words. (Not that I’ve been very high in the words department since that day, but you know.) Before I can attempt to pantomime some kind of response, the ghost goes on:

“You know that curse was just a prank, right? Told ya I was being merciful. Seeya!”

And before I can say anything, the ghost vanishes into thin air.

THE END

Spoiler: Author

Chibi Pika

 

[The Walrein]

#13:​

“Oh yeah?” Call Me Schmaltzy retorted, eyes slitted accusingly at the threatening Hex Maniac that now stood before him. Her gengar partner was still rubbing the rising welt from where the Moonstone made contact with his forehead. Served him right for being a ghost. Stupid Ghast. Call Me Schmaltzy didn’t even care if it was offensive to call ghost types that anymore. He’d shout it from the rooftops, especially if it got this Ghast defender off his back.

After straightening his wizard hat, filthy as a sign of the friends he made along the way, he waved his magic wand toward the Hex Maniac.“Well, I, the Great Called Me Schmaltzy, put the Curse Of Always-Having-To-Run-In-Place-For-The-Rest-Of-The-Day-Otherwise-You-Will-Have-A-Heart-Attack on you!”

His intent shot from the tip of the wand is a short burst, barreling toward the Hex Maniac. The gengar looked startled, even in his post-projectile haze, but the Hex Maniac looked unfazed. Just when Call Me Schmaltzy thought it was checkmate, the beam quite literally bounced off the air around the Hex Maniac, hurdling back toward him. The next thing he knew, he was running in place. And he couldn’t stop.

“Wha—“ he gasped. “What did you do to me, Ghast Lover?”

“Did you really think I would just let somebody like you curse me? You and that filthy star-covered dunce hat? Don’t make me laugh.”

Ironically, now the Gengar was laughing. Call Me Schmaltzy wanted to throw another Moonstone, but he couldn’t stop running.

“I did say it would be the last Moonstone you threw,” the Hex Maniac declared. “That’s what you get for being a Corporeal Form Supremacist, Call Me Schmaltzy. This is karma.”

“This isn’t over, Ghast Lover! I will eventually be able to stop running, and when I do, you’ll be hearing from my lawyer!”

The Hex Maniac looked no more disgruntled than she did to start. “I’m certain this will hold up in court,” she said, irony stinking the air around her.

And so, the great ghost racist Call Me Schlamtzy finally got his comeuppance in the face of his mission to throw Moonstones at every ghost-type Pokemon…or did he? Find out what happens on the next episode, “Call Me Shmaltzy Goes to Court.”

THE END

Spoiler: Author

Sinderella