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Pokémon Starfall [Oneshot]
One quick suggestion... I wonder if you couldn't have started the story at the bar scene. Personally, I didn't feel like the preceeding bit was necessary. I will also say that the climax was very difficult for me to follow. That's not necessarily bad, but in this case I do think it hampered my...- Word Count: 230
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- Post #6
- Forum: Fanfiction