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Chapter 8 Review — Read this chapter twice to look for details. I noticed how the archaic terminology of “lowering his body into what seemed like a more fighting stance” reflects Raskin’s own lack of polish. — Lyco is kind of a horrible person. But I feel like she need to be in order to crack...

Chapter 7 Review — Witnessing Sid discover how to use his fire is really interesting. It’s like the Pokemon of Oldden have atrophied energy sources and are gradually returning to normal strength. — Can’t help but wonder how their finances are doing. Raskin made a note of getting the lock...

Chapter 6 Review — I liked how you handled the flashback sequence at the start of the chapter, beginning with Saturday but running through the week’s events leading up to then. It set the stage really well. — Oof Sid. Oof. He lost some endearment points for putting Raskin on the spot like...

Chapter 5 Review — “being made redundant” is strange phrasing to me. Is that British, by chance? — Raskin and Sid each grabbing a beer when times are tough is a mood. — I don’t know if this was intentional or not, but I love how Raskin immediately goes into explaining his theory (which is...

Chapter 4 review: — Maybe Raskin isn’t all that foolhardy. It’s good that he’s being vague about his answers because that would mean he could blow it off later… but, ah, we both know he probably won’t be so lucky. Haha — Nice fake-out with the letter. I thought they were goners for a brief...

Chapter 3 review: — “Battle of the Bakers” lol. I like how lame it is; it makes the organized fight feel much more archaic, which is appropriate for their first one. — Sid is a cool dude. I know I already said he was based, but I think I can safely conclude this now. He’s kind of a moron, but...

(Crossposted from FFN) Chapter 2 Review: Howdy! Some more quick thoughts. — Didn’t mind the slightly expository worldbuilding much. It was interesting stuff. I’m already wondering what kind of symbolic or logistical role the Founding Oak will serve. — Outlaw Lycanroc seems shady. I say she’s...

(Crossposted from FFN) (Note that any references to the summary in this review are specifically referencing the summary on FFN) Howdy Cynsh! How’s writing been? This is a neat-looking story you’ve got here. — Summary is better than adequate. Drew me in straightaway. — When it comes to hooks...