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Dave hadn’t slept much. Again. He listened to the debriefing, silent, until Pop brought up the Substitutes. “Excuse me, what? They’re coming along? Doesn’t that risk them, you know, just getting hit by a stray attack? All just fucking moonquaked into oblivion at the same time, before we get to...

Ascension was fucked up. One day these two were a Mew and Lucario, then one day they were just... big dogs. Dave wasn't entirely convinced this had needed all the secrecy -- who exactly was Bahamut afraid would hear about it with dire consequences? -- but whatever. It was done, they'd come in...

Dave nodded slowly. "Sure. Try that teleport thing." He had the worst feeling it wouldn't save him anyway. But he turned around towards the door nonetheless, and Mia followed. <><><><><>

"Hmmm." He wasn't sure how far to trust that, but whatever. Arceus didn't seem likely to budge on this. Maybe he should go talk to Maple sometime. "Well, either way, I think we'd better head off to prepare. Mia, got any last questions for God?" "He's not really God. He makes sense and he...

Huh. Obviously Maple wasn't really a Smeargle, but she had a true form in some way that a regular Voice of Life didn't? "...Well, given literally nothing about her matches up with being a Voice of Life, and she still insists she is one, that's pretty suspect to me. It's cool she's been helpful...

"Well, she says she's a Voice of Life but that doesn't really check out, right? They're not supposed to be able to leave the world they originate in, but here she is, world-hopping as she pleases. And her whole MO is nothing like what I hear Voices are supposed to be about. Like, what...

"I mean, devil's advocate, just say you'll kill anyone who refuses to touch it. Sounds like that was pretty much the plan anyway." Dave scowled. "I get that Maple'd be suspicious when we appeared. That's not my problem. My problem is she's hiding something about who she is. And even after we all...

...Of course. Why was he even surprised. "You know, maybe instead of presenting it as cool happy powers to give us, and then foisting them onto us whether we liked it or not, you could have just been fucking honest and told us you wanted us to touch the goddamn evil detector to prove we're not...

Dave shifted. "Sure, but from Owen's intel Joule's power is way beyond that. I don't think just your current defenses are going to be enough to survive the hit, if you actually wind up taking it. Maybe some of us could beef you up?" It was kind of disconcerting for the actual fucking creator of...

Hmmm. "Is it important? Because, you know, if worse comes to worst you may not exactly get a chance to explain later. Does somebody else know?"

Interesting. Dave peered at Arceus. "I'm... sensing that you're not at your full power right now. What's up with that?"

"Hmm. Still. Teleport plan might still work, if you do it quickly enough." "But Joule isn't clever," Mia said, frowning. "He'd kill everyone immediately if he went all out to attack but instead he's going to waste time healing himself if we disrupt him even a little. That's very stupid." Dave...

Ha. He hadn't expected much of a reaction, given how Arceus had largely ignored Mia's suggestions, but this was actually getting somewhere. Maybe Maple'd portal him away and it'd hit her instead. If only. "I mean, what happens if you stop attracting it? Does it swing back around to Destiny...

Dave peered at Arceus, frowning. Mia's train of thought made more sense than he liked to admit. At this point, yeah, he believed that Arceus legitimately thought he might not survive this. And it didn't sound like the fake sort of god death where they're actually undying and just suffering...

Dave nodded slowly. He supposed if you had to have a god, the world playing out to the furthest degree possible as if there weren't one but maybe he can wave a magic wand to prevent a catastrophe now and then might be about the best you could fucking hope for. "Dave's Radiance can make shields...

Well, that was certainly one way of doing it. Create the world, then leave it alone unless you really have to. Problem of evil: God doesn't do anything about it because mortals should know how to handle themselves. Sure. "What happens if you wake up and, you know, something horrific has...

Mia cocked her head. "If you get behind something else, you shouldn't have to end the attraction to make it hit it." Arceus wasn't giving much of a straight answer about how he used his powers, huh. Dave rolled his eyes. "I mean, sure, you can define demigod to include literally everyone, but...

Arceus turned toward Mia instead, and Dave exhaled slowly, his heart still racing. Protector, huh. "What do you mean, power behind perspective, desires can manifest by power and will alone?" Maybe that just meant shit like Dark Matter, this notion of vague negative thoughts congealing into some...

"Yeah, hating the game is what I'm doing, thanks," Dave said. Something about Arceus's expression and demeanor had changed, a shift that made his hackles rise and the Poochyena brain scream at him. He stayed rooted on the spot, claws digging into the floor. "Jesus, you think I'm here to ask you...

"Oh, even better, you've got guests running around the world deciding to murder people, only not doing it because you tell them not to, and now you're preparing some kind of grand heroic sacrifice that'll leave fuck-all to stop them, I guess. I feel much better, thanks." Dave took a deep...