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Your fanfics as r/relationships posts

Dragonfree

Moderator
Staff
Location
Iceland
Pronouns
she/her/hers
Partners
  1. butterfree
  2. mightyena
  3. charizard
  4. scyther-mia
  5. vulpix
  6. slugma
Just for fun, inspired by this tweet, sum up your stories in the form of a title (or multiple) in the style of the infamous r/relationships subreddit!

The Quest for the Legends:

My (11M) parents conspired with the local librarian to keep me from finding out about this legendary Pokémon (1000M?) that they didn't want me to see. I went to see it anyway, it killed me to recruit me on this quest to save the world, and meanwhile my parents have been made to forget they attended my funeral. Am I the asshole here?

I (11F) joined this group with this girl I really admire (12F), but I think she may have murdered someone (13M)?? What do I do??

I (1000M) just found out that my dad (2000X) lied to me my whole life about his best friend (??????M), who was like my role model but apparently he was actually destroying almost all life every 1000 years. It won't stop unless he and I both die. Am I the asshole for being mad at my dad for this???

Morphic:

I (37M) and some others created half-human half-Pokémon hybrid embryos in the name of medical science, which we were going to abort, but now we're being made to raise them. Kids are the last fucking thing I want. Help?
 

Persephone

Infinite Screms
Pronouns
her/hers
Partners
  1. mawile
  2. vulpix-alola
I (6F) have a human friend (15F) who doesn't understand very basic things about the world. She gets mad when I try to train her and I think she might leave me for some other pokemon she's shown interest in. Is this worth the effort?

Or by the end of the story (v minor spoilers, just current planned final team ages and genders):
My (16F) pokemon (7F, 0.5F, 63F, 3M, 912(?)F(?), 21F are trying to unionize.
 
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Keleri

I Like Cats
Staff
Pronouns
They/Them
Here's mine in the style of similarly drama-filled subreddit /r/AmITheAsshole:

I (52F) tried to keep my niece (18F) from going on a pokemon journey due to the danger, and she was almost immediately attacked by killer pokemon, cryptids, and terrifying immortal mystic trainers, but somehow I'm the asshole here?
 

Umbramatic

The Ghost Lord
Location
The Yangverse
Pronouns
Any
Partners
  1. reshiram
Rude Awakening

(Chapter 6 Spoilers):

I (BeginningOfTimeF) took my brothers (BeginningOfTimeM, BeginningOfTimeM) and a friend (SeveralMilleniaAtLeastM) to a video game universe for vacation, but some of the locals want to cause the apocalypse? Send help?

Heroes After All:

I (8M) am trying to make friends at school but literally no one likes me? Also I have no Pokemon and my superpowers keep exploding, which does not help.

(Chapter 6 spoilers):

I (1yearatmostbutmentallyabout8M) set off to escape from my abusive extended family but a Charizard tried to eat me. I escaped but where do I go now?
 

Chibi Pika

Stay positive
Staff
Location
somewhere in spacetime
Pronouns
they/them
Partners
  1. pikachu-chibi
  2. lugia
  3. palkia
  4. lucario-shiny
  5. incineroar-starr
This thread is the best thing ever and all of these are cracking me up. Keep it up everyone. xD

And now, the best summary of LC you'll ever see:


I (14F) ran away from home without a training license and I'm planning to join a rebel team fighting Team Rocket run by this guy (18?M) that I met in the woods. Am I making a huge mistake?

I mean it, don't click unless you've read ahead on other sites. >:/
I (17F) just ran into my childhood best friends (14F, 16F) after five years, only they're working for the enemy and my boss/dad (45M) just ordered me to kill them or he's going to disown me. What do I do??
I (18M) recruited a bunch of children (12-14) to fight a war for me and half of them got killed. Am I the asshole here?
 

NebulaDreams

Ace Trainer
Partners
  1. luxray
  2. hypno
Black Paint (r/choosingbeggars edition)

I (4M, though maybe about 17 in human years) am trying to make a buck for my trainer (15M) by doing caricatures, and then this scary lady pops up and asks me to draw her and her Jynx for free. Then she calls me the asshole and starts siccing her ice-type on me. What is my trainer supposed to live off of, exposure?

Outside the Frame

i (6M) met this coot girl on diancord, but shes a hooman and im a zango. she wants 2 come 2 meet mom so she can adopt me, but moms a mess atm. is this wierd???
 

DeliriousAbsol

*Crazy Absol Noises*
Location
Behind a laptop, most likely with tea
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. mawile
Okay I'm gonna give this a go...

System:Reboot

I (19M) stumbled upon a secret government base while chasing golden ships, and stole some girl I found in a box. Now the government wants me dead. What do I do?
 

Bluwiikoon

waow!
Location
Gensokyo, Past and Present ~ Flower Land
Pronouns
He/him
Partners
  1. nosepass-bluwiikoon
pcb0000

I (??) got in contact with someone (??) who's helping me open some old files, and they seem really nice! I can't actually talk with them, but I really want them to know that I appreciate what they're doing. Is it weird for me to get so attached to someone when I don't know anything about them?
 

NebulaDreams

Ace Trainer
Partners
  1. luxray
  2. hypno
The Curious and the Shiny

Shine: I (11M, 23 in human years) recently met this Lucario (12F, 25 in human years) who I sort of know but don't at the same time. And also we had a lot of baggage in the past where we were a part of this experimental facility, and my missing eye might've had something to do with it. And this Lucario's accusing me of leaving her behind. Am I the asshole here???
 

unrepentantAuthor

A cat that writes stories.
Location
UK
Pronouns
they/she
Partners
  1. purrloin-salem
  2. sneasel-dusk
  3. luz-companion
  4. brisa-companion
  5. meowth-laura
  6. delphox-jesse
  7. mewtwo
  8. zeraora
My (F9, 18 in human years) human partner (F19) went to live away from home to attend uni and left me behind. Instead of waiting for her to come home, I also left and made a lot of changes to my lifestyle and appearance. I don't expect she'd recognise me if we ever met each other again, but I miss her a lot. Should I try to find and contact her?
 

IFBench

Rescue Team Member
Location
Pokemon Paradise
Partners
  1. chikorita-saltriv
  2. bench-gen
  3. charmander
  4. snivy
  5. treecko
  6. tropius
  7. arctozolt
  8. wartortle
I (17M) am on a team with a Chikorita (16N) and a Charmander (18M) whose friendship with me will probably collapse the moment my secret is revealed. I've dug myself too deep to come clean. What do I do?
 

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
I (23F) got caught by a bunch of weirdo Magma creeps and realized Team Aqua is a bunch of creeps so I decided I'd leave but then kept changing my mind and my Golduck (20M) keeps getting mad at me for staying with TA. AITA for hanging around??
 

canisaries

you should've known the price of evil
Location
Stovokor
Pronouns
she/her
Partners
  1. inkay-shirlee
  2. houndoom-elliot
  3. yamask-joanna
  4. shuppet
  5. deerling-andre
whoa i can't believe i didn't post here

Seiren

My (18M) adoptive omanyte son (2monM, resurrected twice) who carries the spirit of my god (13.8bilM) has recently become so obsessed with an inkay pop star (?F) that He no longer pays any attention to me. How can I kill her and get away with it? Plans involving torture preferred.
 

K_S

Unrepentent Giovanni and Rocket fan
Transversal:

I am a (M: 45) separated from my estranged son (M:15), (time travel/Legend activity have de-aged him to 5-8?) seeking relationship advise as differing political opinions caused rift in first reunion. Should I even try to tackle old issues as he's presently amnesiac courtesy of Legend activity or take things as is? Attempting to be seportive/involved via social media and phone calls but difering dimensions and time warps are causing chronic communication issues.

Barring that, a clue as to what Region I've been dropped off at would be appreciated??? It seems an odd marriage of Seafoam and a Distortion World pocket and I can't seem to find my way out.
 

BossCar

Pokémon Trainer
Pronouns
He/His
I (24M) still get really nervous around my crush (23F), even though I won her four years ago. How do I lift her up without getting shy and nervous? Why am I even here trying to socialize with you people to begin with?
 

Blackjack Gabbiani

Merely a collector
Pronouns
Them
Partners
  1. shaymin
  2. dusknoir
Obsession (as of chapter 35):
My (11m) friend (14f) is starting to act irrationally and I think it's impacting our relationship with our mentor (48m), who's also acting irrationally and it's making me very uncomfortable.

Obsession (eventually):
How do I (26m) convince the bird of my dreams that it would be better off as part of my collection rather than living in some dingy ocean?


The King In Exile:
I (20m) think my boss is going to do something stupid that's going to get me killed. Should I confront him now?


Answering Machine:
My (35m) boyfriend (35m) is so busy with work that he hasn't called me back in weeks. Also I think he may be a supervillain. Should I talk to him about either of these things or just see how they pan out?


Friends:
So there's this emotionally stunted douchebag (27m) that I (26f) keep seeing platonically but it's taking forever for him to pick up that I want to be friends at all. He's convinced I'm only seeing him to gloat about something that happened a few months ago. His therapy animal seems to understand. Should I be direct? I'm kind of enjoying seeing how long it takes him to get it and I'd hate to put a stop to that.
 

IFBench

Rescue Team Member
Location
Pokemon Paradise
Partners
  1. chikorita-saltriv
  2. bench-gen
  3. charmander
  4. snivy
  5. treecko
  6. tropius
  7. arctozolt
  8. wartortle
A Way to Reunite:

I (14M) have lost contact with my best friend (14M). We're from completely different worlds and I don't know how to go to his world again.

How do I reunite?
 

Blackjack Gabbiani

Merely a collector
Pronouns
Them
Partners
  1. shaymin
  2. dusknoir
Oh god I wanna do more.

Walls:
This douchey cop keeps hanging around cramping my (25m) style but he's just about the only person who seems to give a shit about me. How do I tell him to piss off but in, like, a casual way?


The King In Exile (yes again):
How do I (45m) get it through my employee's (20m) head that he has a duty to not only me but to his region? He's perhaps the most powerful trainer in the region and thus has a responsibility to serve as a knight. He also keeps telling me to stop comparing everything to a fairy tale, but he just doesn't understand the potent symbolism.

The King In Exile (spoiler version):
I (45m) got my prize employee (20m) killed and I have no idea how to handle the guilt because I still don't believe I did anything wrong even though everyone tells me I did. I deeply regret his loss, but I don't see any way it could have been avoided either

Solar System:
-I (23f) just got out of a weird living situation and want to figure out how to be a normal girl. How do I learn how to do that?
-I (33f) hate having a normal life, I'm in love with my boss (28m), and I can't get over hating my rival (19f) how do people cope with this?
-I (19f) got approached for life advice by someone I was in a cult with and I think people get the wrong impression that I'm somehow stable just because I left earlier than anyone else did. If this is going to keep happening, how do I become a role model?
-I (24m) feel like I've outlived any potential I ever had.
-My mom keeps thinking that the cult I (21m) was in was a performance group. Should I let her keep thinking this, or is the shoe going to drop? Also she keeps getting on my case about plastic surgery for some reason. How do I let her know she's crossing a line?
-I (28m) know I need to confront my problems someday but first I need to stop thinking of things in terms of linear time. Also a man keeps trying to aggressively befriend me just because his son has, and I'm not used to having friends at all. What is...normal in this situation?
-A bunch of upstarts had me (63m) thrown in prison over a conspiracy and I'm not about to take this lying down. AITA for emotionally manipulating a pokemon to break me out? I'm doing it anyway; I just need to know how much I should gloat when this succeeds.
 
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