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Non-Pokémon Origin

Notes and Table of Contents

windskull

Bidoof Fan
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bravoman cover.png
Hitoshi Nakamura's life is about to get flipped on its head. While walking home from an average work day, he encounters an alien that gives him superpowers and grants him the title "Bravoman." And not a moment too soon, With villains beginning to rise in his sleepy hometown, he'll have to learn how to handle his powers fast, or be overwhelmed by evil.

Genre: Action/Comedy
Rating: G
Warnings: Mild to moderate violence.
Note: There is a possiblity of mild blood in later chapters, but it's going to depend a bit on how things shake out

Feedback preferences: I'm fine with any feedback presented! Though please keep in mind that I am not planning to have this fic series be as polished as some of my other works. Additionally, I am making an effort for the comic to be presentable to an audience unfamiliar with the source material (such is the suffering of tiny fandoms). Do let me know if anything within the story feels difficult to understand.

Author's notes:
Hi all! This is a side project I'm working on. Essentially, it's a series of short stories and novella length stories loosely adapting the Bravoman comic... except I wanted to give the characters more depth. I adore the comic, but I also adore reading dynamic characters too, and I decided to mash up the best of both worlds. This adaptation will be, in parts, darker than the source material, though I do intend it keep things fairly light-hearted. I hope you enjoy!

Please note: this project is very much just for fun. Updates will be sporadic and it may not have the same level of polish as some of my other stuff. I'm open to any and all feedback, but please keep this in mind

Table of Contents
Chapter 1: Normal Guy, Normal Life
Chapter 2: Transformation by Mystic Light
Chapter 3: The Obligatory Exposition Chapter
Chapter 4: Elsewhere...
 
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1. Normal Guy, Normal LIfe

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
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  7. purugly
  8. mawile
1. Normal Guy, Normal Life​

The hero runs from rooftop to rooftop, keeping a bird's-eye view of the city. His eyes are sharp, looking out for crime. Below, citizens catch glimpses of him, but don't try to stop him for a chat. They feel a little safer, knowing he's out there, watching.

Suddenly, a cry for help reaches his ears. He springs from his vantage point, following the noise until he finds a group of thugs harassing a hapless citizen. With a growl in his throat, he leaps into battle, getting a surprise first strike as he knocks one of them out with a clean punch! He spins around, only to-


“Mister Nakamura!”

“Huh? What?”

Hitoshi Nakamura was snapped out of his daydream. He slowly tilted his head up, blinking at the scrunched up, scowling face of a spindly, gray-haired man in a neatly pressed suit. Phillip White. His boss.

It took a moment for the displeased gaze to register. As soon as it did he sat up a bit straighter, eyes wide behind his thick glasses. His heart threatened to leap out of his chest.

"O-oh, good afternoon sir! I hope you're doing well!" Hitoshi laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. His manager only continued to scowl, glaring down at him with crossed arms.

“You’re not paid to daydream, Hitoshi.” Phillip said, waving a dismissive hand.He leaned down to thump the back of his hand against Hiroshi's monitor “Get back to work.” He turned and walked away, though not without periodically glancing back with a steely glare that warned of a write-up if Hitoshi didn’t get back to work.

“Y… yes sir…” Hitoshi mumbled before letting out a sigh, turning his attention back to his computer screens. One screen displayed several images of what used to be someone's house. Now it was little more than a pile of rubble. On the other screen, a loss verification report told the story: the home was located in Namco City, a large city a few hours drive south of his own town, New Neo Kyoto. The house had been collateral damage in a clash between a local hero-villain duo, something that seemed to be unnaturally common around the city.

He began typing information on the claim into the system, trying to not let his mind drift. Yet, he couldn’t help but imagine himself watching the battle unfold. Sure, it was terrible that someone lost their home, but he couldn’t help but think about how cool it would be to see a real life hero duke it out with the forces of evil.

But, life isn’t a game, he mentally chided himself. Even though superheroes are real, things aren’t as black and white as a comic book. Case in point, the innocent that got caught up in the middle.

Letting out another sigh, he closed his eyes, pushed away from his desk, and stood up. Thinking about the darkness of the world did his mind no good. He needed a snack break.

He made his way down to the breakroom, passing row after row of cubicles. A few coworkers offered him a quick greeting as he passed, but most ignored him to focus on their work or to speak into their headset with some client. No one smiled.

Besides the quiet hum of electric lights and the almost inaudible murmur of a TV on low volume, the break room was quiet, empty. The walls, floor, and tables were all white, giving the room a sterile vibe; only the silver of the metal table legs and the black of the vending machine broke up the monotony.

Hitoshi dug his hand into a pocket, pulling out a few coins and a bit of lint. He stared at the meager offerings with a frown before turning his attention to the vending machine. Just enough for a bag of chips. Thank god payday was tomorrow.

With his snack in hand, he flopped into a chair and reached for his phone, using the camera to give himself a quick look over. Short brown hair with parted bangs, owlish glasses that hid sepia brown eyes, and a two piece blue suit that was just presentable enough to keep him in dress code. Yep everything was still in order.

He sat his phone back on the table face down and reached for his bag of chips. For just a moment, he allowed himself to smile, savoring their salty taste. But all too soon his snack was gone, and he had to return to his desk.

This day can’t end soon enough.



The hours trickled by like a leaky faucet. Hitoshi was relieved when his computer read 5:30. He locked his things, signed out, and scurried out of the building, letting himself smile as he emerged into afternoon sunlight. A pleasant breeze ruffled his hair, blowing away the stresses of the day. The difference in his mood was like night and day. It was finally the weekend, and he had plans.

He made his way down the cracked sidewalk with a spring in his step, eyes glimmering with excitement. When he tripped over a particularly busted chunk of pavement and nearly fell flat on his face, he just hopped back up and shook it off. Even the cramped train ride home couldn’t put a damper on his mood. Now that the weekend was here, he could finally put some time into the new Final Fantasy game.

The train pulled into his stop and he squeezed his way between a pair of larger men, stumbling out onto the platform. He hurried off down the road, humming a lighthearted tune.

Before he reached home, he had to pass through an older, more run down part of town. The buildings here showed their age: yellowed windows, faded storefronts, and cracked brickwork. Several buildings were boarded up, weeds growing through the cracks of their parking lot. Others looked abandoned, but a car in front or an open sign suggested otherwise.

It was oddly quiet today, more so than usual. From his vantage point, he couldn't see anyone in the few open shops. Only a couple cars had passed by, all headed in the opposite direction. Was the road closed up ahead? How strange. His heart fluttered in his chest, and he slowed his gait to a cautious walk. Something didn’t feel right. Before he could dwell on it, a loud boom that shook the ground sounded from somewhere ahead.

Hitoshi yelped and sprang back, clutching his bag to his chest. He froze in place as his eyes darted to and fro, in search of the source of the sound. At first, he saw nothing. Then, from around the corner about a block ahead, he could see a thick plume of black smoke rising. Instinctually, he wanted to run away. That spelled nothing but trouble, and he was just a scrawny little office worker who hadn’t done a proper workout since highschool. Surely the police or the fire department or something would come running any time now.

But instead of listening to rational thought, he dashed doward the sound. If they weren’t already there, who knew how long it would take for first responders to arrive. Nobody had come running from that direction, as far as he could tell. Where were the other civilians? What if someone was hurt? What if he could help them?

He rounded the corner, thoughts of heroism in his mind, only to freeze again once he saw what he was up against.

The explosion had been caused by a car that had gone up in flames, now little more than a smoking hunk of metal. Fortunately, it had just been parked on the side of the road, and as far as he could tell, there hadn’t been anyone in it. It was alarming, certainly, but it wasn’t what really caught his attention.

Further down the road was a tank. A tank. Was this some sort of military drill? That would explain why no one was here, but it didn’t make sense. Why would they run drills in the middle of town? He’d heard stories of such things, but those usually took place in abandoned towns, right? That made the most logical sense, but it didn’t line up with what he was seeing now. Sure, this area was run down, but it certainly wasn’t abandoned. Besides, his eyesight might have been bad, but there were no signs of any military markings, as far as he could tell.

The tank’s turret turned, and Hitoshi followed it’s movement. A gasp escaped his mouth. He wasn’t alone.

The stranger was only a bit taller than him, but much stockier. They wore a puffy yellow top with a red triangle down the middle, thick white gloves and boots, and blue pants that shone with a metallic sheen. Where their head should have been was only a white, bulbous, egg-shaped dome. But that wasn’t what weirded him out. The weirdest thing was that they were floating.

Before he had time to process it, the stranger turned and seemed to notice him. They began to nonchalantly float towards him, unbothered by the tank following their every move. As they neared, Hitoshi could make out a few more details, namely the puffy red ring on the front of the helmet - or whatever that was. At the center of the ring was a dark opening; he couldn’t see anything inside.

“H-hey, hold on now!” Hitoshi stammered, taking a nervous step back. But the stranger raised one hand to give him a slow, friendly wave.

“Oh my, what wonderful timing,” the stranger began in a deep, smooth, nearly monotone voice. “Greetings, human. I am Alpha Man, from the planet Alpha, and I seem to find myself in a troubling predicament.” Alpha gestured one hand towards the tank, addressing the situation as if it was a minor inconvenience.

Hitoshi tried to find words to respond, but all he managed to say was, “Alpha… Man?”

“Correct. I wasn’t expecting any trouble when I arrived, but it seems I may have underestimated your earth technology. But now you’ve come along at just the right time to help me out. Oh, hold that thought."

Suddenly, Alpha reached down to hook his arms around Hitoshi's waist. He lifted him into the air and zipped away. And not a moment too soon. A loud boom sounded from the tank, then the ground where Hitoshi had stood was hit with a projectile, sending up a spray of shrapnel and busted asphalt.

Alpha flew him over the tank and sat him down on the other side. “Now, as I was saying-”

“N-now hold on just a minute!” Hitoshi stammered, taking a step back. “What’s going on here? Why are you being attacked by a tank? Why is there a tank?

The alien tilted to the side slightly, almost as if he was trying to tilt his head. Then he waved a dismissive hand. “Oh, don’t worry about that, we don’t have the kind of wordcount to get into that right now.”

“We… what?” Hitoshi blinked. What was Alpha going on about now? He frowned, and started to back away from the alien, but Alpha grabbed his hand, pulling him away . A glance up showed him that the tank had adjusted its aim onto them, and was trying to follow their movements.

“Don’t worry about that,” Alpha Man said. “Suffice to say that I can explain later.” He let go and then stood still. Hitoshi got the notion that he was being stared at, but it was impossible to read Alpha’s expression.

“I think you just might be the type of human I’m looking for. You certainly look like you’d fit… What is your name, human?”

What? None of this made sense! One minute Alpha is babbling nonsense, the next he’s… talking to him like he hadn’t said something cryptic? All while they were casually avoiding tank fire. From a tank that had no business being here! Logically, he should be turning and running away right about now! And yet… something about the absurdity of this situation was too much. He felt compelled to answer. “Hi… Hitoshi. Hitoshi Nakamura.”

Alpha seemed to stare at him a moment longer, then he twisted to reach into some sort of bag-like accessory that hung from his hip. “Well, Hitoshi, I have an offer for you that I hope you’ll take.” He pulled his hand from the bag, holding something in his fist. One last glance was spared towards the tank, then faced Hitoshi and offered out his hand. “Tell me. Have you ever wanted to be a superhero?”

1/5/22: Fixed some minor formatting issues that got messed up when being ported over.
 
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Pen

the cat is mightier than the pen
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Hey windskull! Saw this fic hadn't gotten much love yet and thought I'd check it out. I'm not familiar with Bravoman, but I found this chapter pretty easy to digest--there wasn't anything in the worldbuilding that left me confused. We've got that standard comic book set-up where superheroes and villains are known phenomena and feature on the local news. The emphasis on the property destruction of people caught in the middle was interesting--I wasn't sure if that was just an aside, or if it will be a major theme.

Hitoshi himself is likeable enough as your average, run-down office worker with secret dreams. He feels like a bit of a blank-slate, in the way this character archetype often does. As with most people in this situation, I'll be curious to learn what heroism means to him. I don't have much of a read on Alpha yet--hard to, with his not having facial expressions due to not having a face! That seems like an interesting challenge in both literary and visual mediums to pull off.

Overall, I think you nailed a light-hearted tone fitting for a comic adaption. The prose read easily and I didn't feel like the segments exploring Hitoshi's mundane life dragged--there was enough detail and character voice to keep it interesting, and in stories of transformation, it's always important to see what the status quo was.

The hours trickled by like a leaky faucet.
Loved this simile. Very appropriate to the character.

A pleasant breeze ruffled his hair, blowing away the stresses of the day. The difference in his mood was like night and day.
Sentences that end on the same word like this always trip me up a bit when I read.

Now that the weekend was here, he could finally put some time into the new Final Fantasy game.
Mood. It's crazy how excited we get about doing something mindless like playing a game.

Hitoshi followed it’s movement.
* its

Where their head should have been was only a white, bulbous, egg-shaped dome. But that wasn’t what weirded him out. The weirdest thing was that they were floating.
Really?! Of those two things, the lack of head feels weirder to me, but you do you Hitoshi.

“Oh, don’t worry about that, we don’t have the kind of wordcount to get into that right now.”
Oh, so we're getting meta now.
 

kintsugi

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unknown.png

^actual footage of me realizing that Bravoman probably gets his powers from Alphaman and it's the NATO alphabet, colorized

hi wind, long time no see! I admit I've always been curious about Bravoman when he shows up (mostly in mafia, although I remember reading a oneshot by you set in this universe in ages past), so I figured this would be as good a time as any. I wasn't really picking for line quotes or anything since you'd mentioned not being super tied to the prose, but in general I thought things flowed really smoothly here and I liked how the sentences fit together on a large scale.

I liked the intro here--it's just hammy enough to make me lean in, but the daydream is revealed quickly enough that it doesn't feel like a major fakeout or anything, and we get good insight into who Hitoshi is as a result. I feel like the one thing that would be really helpful here is commenting on the character depth that you'd mentioned wanting to add between this and the source material, which, alas, I can't really do either, since I don't have a good metric for what's new/what's old--but I like Hitoshi in this, and in general how you portray him as sort of being beaten down by his corporate job but still dreaming of more. It's not really an archetype I see frequently: usually you get the jaded old adult who doesn't believe in helping people any more, or the youthful bright-eyed sidekick who immediately runs into the first speck of danger he sees because helping my friends is nakama. So this middle ground of this insurance claims collector who hates his job and is on tight terms with his boss and the one shriveled speck of joy in his life is that he has enough pocket change to buy afternoon chips, but immediately jumps at the prospect of being a superhero is a really fun melding that works a lot better in practice than I was expecting.

Alphaman reminds me a lot of whatever trope stemmed from Green Lantern, where an alien crashes and passes their powers to an everyman human, but I'm curious if this will end up being twisted around somehow as well! Not that it has to or anything (or even that, as an adaptation of the comic, that that's really something in your control); this is more just a bit of curiosity after the whole 9-5 punchcard worker x Deku from MHA crossover that seems to be happening with Hitoshi.

Comics strike this light-hearted (one might even say comedic) tone that I think we often forget about in writing because we're really focused on making everything miserable ig--but I like how there's echoes of that in the writing. "I don't have the words to tell you" feels like the original was "I don't have the art budget to explain" or something, but it paints a really vivid picture of this quirky alien who's basically just popping out of the panel. The visual descriptions are a little harder to nail in written prose but from the way you describe his costume, I imagine he's also literally color-popping in contrast to a much more grey/brown world around him, and that's a lot of fun to try to imagine.

I think the short chapter lengths do you well here. This again sort of feels like a relic of older webcomics, where the early chapters are just sort of spamming through the action because that's what first time webcomic authors tend to do, but I also think that's a common choice for a reason--jump right into that action/comedy line, ya know?

Overall this one's a lot of fun. I know it isn't expected to update quite as frequently, but I do think it's an interesting exercise as far as studying structures/adaptations even ignoring the contents itself (which I did also enjoy). Best of luck here!
 

Panoramic_Vacuum

Hoenn around
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Bravo~mannnnNNNN! Imagine my delight upon seeing this fic and finally getting to meet the man, the myth, the mafia Legend! Sure this is a forum for Pokemon fanfiction, but I sincerely mean this, thank you for sharing this story here. I know it's a side project, but after meeting Bravoman a few times now, I really am glad to get the chance to know the story behind the mask (also I know the pain of small/obscure fandom things with my original fandom, so I am always down to learn about new things people enjoy).

Right away this fic oozes charm. It's so tropey and fun and honestly I love stuff like this. The formula isn't anything earthshattering: ho-hum fellow in a dead-end office job ends up in a wild situation that will flip-turn his life on its head. And yet I can't get enough, I could read this kind of thing over and over and find new joy in it, and of course this is no exception to the rule.

Aside from the charm, there's so much humor in this, both subtle and obvious. Hitoshi, paper pusher, dreaming of becoming a super hero by night, is actually an insurance adjuster who handles cases caused by damage from, you guessed it, super heroes and their clashes with villains. Fantastic. Then there's Alphaman himself(?) The fourth wall breaking is always a gag I'll love, and the casualness of his conversation with Hitoshi all the while being fired upon by a freaking tank, it's hilarious.

And of course cue my shock that Bravoman actually comes from Alphaman. I thought it was maybe a play on the word "brave" or "bravado", because from your portrayal of Bravoman in the mafia games, he's definitely on the shy and timid end of things. Though, the personality of Hitoshi as a very normal every-man who takes tongue lashings from his boss in stride and finds the greatest joy in life from the weekend, it's a fun contrast to this wild confidence a super hero like Alphaman exudes. I've been able to catch glimpses of it in Mafia, but I wonder how much "bravado" Hitoshi will gain from becoming Bravoman, and how much of it comes from the suit, and how much of it will come from his growth into the role.

You do a great job painting the setting for this fic. The absolute droll of every day life in a city full of amazing and powerful super-figures adds to the absurdity of it all. When Hitoshi's day is brightened by a bag of chips from the vending machine, you know something's gotta give. I don't know much about My Hero Academia, but this has very similar vibes to the pilot of that series, but taking itself way less seriously, which I am here for!

I know you're not as focused on this project as much, but I definitely am excited to read more of the misadventures of Bravoman.
 
2. Transformation by Mystic Light

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
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I wanted to get a chapter out during the blitz so here we are! Don't expect this update speed to last. Thanks to Kint, Pen, and Pano for checking this out. I honestly kind of expected that I'd be throwing this into the void due to being one of those tiny fandoms. Anyways, Review Replies!
I'll be curious to learn what heroism means to him. I don't have much of a read on Alpha yet--hard to, with his not having facial expressions due to not having a face! That seems like an interesting challenge in both literary and visual mediums to pull off.
Oh believe me, it is absolutely a literary challenge. But honestly? That's one of the things I find myself enjoying the most about translating something that was initially visual into a written medium, finding ways to deal with things like this!
Oh, so we're getting meta now.
Believe me, the source material is extremely meta. I'm making an effort to balance that with a moderately more serious tone.
^actual footage of me realizing that Bravoman probably gets his powers from Alphaman and it's the NATO alphabet, colorized
8) Oh believe me, while I won't be getting to it in this story, if I continue to write more past it (and I'm sure I will because I'm desparate for content and when the fandom is just two or three people you gotta do it yourself) we'll be seeing at least a few more ties to this.
"I don't have the words to tell you" feels like the original was "I don't have the art budget to explain"
Let me just share the line that inspired this one 8P
1641446068992.png
I may share more panels in future review replies as well as they're relevant. I'm not sticking tightly to the comic (or much at all later, if things go the way I plan), but there might be times here or there where it's worth sharing.
I thought it was maybe a play on the word "brave" or "bravado", because from your portrayal of Bravoman in the mafia games, he's definitely on the shy and timid end of things.
I feel like I should make a quick clarification: the character I've been using in Mafia is Anti-Bravoman, a separate character that will prooobably not show up until the sequel story besides some minor foreshadowing and maybe a cameo or two. So that might explain some of the confusion. Regardless, I'm really happy to hear that you enjoyed what you've read so far.



2. Transformation by Mystic Light
“Have you ever wanted to be a superhero?”

Hitoshi stared at the alien’s outstretched hand, mouth hanging open. Was Alpha being serious? This had to be some sort of prank. And yet… how else was he supposed to explain what was right in front of his eyes? A movie set piece? An elaborate prank? Alpha was floating, for crying out loud. Maybe he was just some rich guy with a bunch of money and a high-tech suit. Or maybe, just maybe he was an honest-to-god alien.

“You may want to decide pretty soon,” Alpha advised, snapping Hitoshi out of his thoughts. “I’d say you have about… ten seconds before the tank locks on to us again.”

He started to reach out his hand, then hesitated. If he agreed, there would be no going back. On the other hand, this was his chance to do good. To be something more than what was the worst that could happen? Like an interviewee wanting to make a good first impression, he reached out and firmly took Alpha’s hand. The alien pressed something into his palm.

Pulling his hand away, Hitoshi opened it to reveal… a metal rod, a tuning fork, and a 100 yen coin? He blinked, staring at the items for a few precious seconds before tilting his head to give Alpha an incredulous look. The Alien had floated several feet back while he was preoccupied, and now just floated in place, as if waiting for something.

“What is this?” Hitoshi asked, his voice raising in pitch and volume as he continued. “Junk you keep in your glovebox?”

“Junk I keep in my space glovebox,” Alpha Man replied with a dismissive wave. “Just give it a moment.”

Hitoshi’s stomach twisted in a knot, and he bowed his head, hopes dashed. Great, it was just one big prank. He should have known better than to get his hopes up. “Well…. If that’s all, I guess I’ll be going….” He trailed off as he looked up and realized Alpha was no longer paying attention to him. Instead, he had turned to look at the sky.

“Right on time.”

Hitoshi tilted his head in roughly the same direction – it was difficult to discern the exact direction Alpha was looking. Is that a star? he thought, noticing something twinkling in the sky. It’s kind of early to be able to see one. Wait now there are two. Are they getting bigger? Brighter They’re definitely getting bigger. Wait, that one—”

Before he had a chance to react, a wind whipped up around him, threatening to knock him over. The objects lifted from his hand, sucked into the air. His breath was sucked from his lungs as he, two was pulled up. Then a beam of pulsing light struck him.

Warmth no, heat — flooded his veins. Suddenly, he was overflowing with energy. Blood roared in his ears, and he felt like he could run forever!

His fingers tingled. His gaze followed the sensations. Small bits of the light clung to his hand, running together, wrapping around the skin from his fingers to halfway up his forearm in the shape of a glove. Then, with a sudden pop, the light became an actual glove. Another pop and a sudden weight told him the same thing had happened to his other arm.

Motes of light continued to climb his arms, forming blue metallic sleeves once the light reached his shoulders. A tingle in his legs suggested something similar was happening to them. The light crawled up his chest and over his head, and for just an instant he was blinded by their brilliance.

And then, all at once, it was over. He dropped to the ground, landing nimbly on his feet. A quick lookover revealed the extent of the transformation. He was wearing a green top, similar to a gymnast’s leotard, but made of a thicker material. Two thin white lines ran vertically down his chest. The space between was yellow, and was padded thicker than the rest of the top. All three stripes came to a stop at his waist, running just under a black belt with a silver buckle.

He could feel another, skintight garment underneath, which seemed to be the source of his metallic sleeves and leggings. White, sturdy, steel-toed boots complimented white gloves. A long, scarlet scarf hung past his waist. The slight tint of a visor filled his vision, and the weight of a helmet sat atop his head. He’d have to get a better look at that later

Letting out a light laugh, he brought a peace sign to his forehead in a rough impression of a Sailor Moon pose. “Is this what it feels like to go through a magical girl transformation? Because I have to say, I’m loving it! I wasn’t so sure about this at first, but this is awesome!”

He brought his hand down and did a couple small circles as he gave himself another look over. “So, what kind of powers does this thing ha-ALP!” His planned barrage of questions cut off as a loud boom sounded, followed by the ground exploding only a few feet away, way too close in front of him. Chunks of cement scattered in all directions, a few hitting him. The smallest pieces plinked harmlessly against the suit, but a few hit hard enough to make him stumble back, stunned. But he was left with little more than dull aches. That would probably bruise later, but he couldn’t complain, considering the alternative.

As the dust cleared, he swiveled his head back towards the tank. It approached slowly, like a cat stalking a clueless mouse, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. His jubilant attitude sobered. There would be time to geek out about his transformation later. For now, it was time to strike back.

If only he had the first clue how to fight. “Hey, uh, Alpha Man?” he called over the rumble of the tank. “What do I do now?”

He glanced behind him, expecting the Alien to be just behind him, but he was nowhere to be seen. His heart fluttered and his breath quickened. Had Alpha abandoned him?

Before panic could set in, he heard a loud beeping to his side. He turned his head and realized it was coming from his glove. There was a hard green piece just above the wrist, which seemed to be the source. Glancing back at the tank, he turned and ran towards an old, rusty car parked on the side of the road, using it as cover.

Safer for the moment, he turned his attention to his glove, which was still beeping at him. He tapped at the hard, metallic piece. From the slightest pressure, it sprang open, ripping a surprised yelp out of his mouth. Beneath the metal, a small screen was embedded in the glove, lit up with a video of Alpha.

“Where are you?” Hitoshi squeaked, his voice raising an octave.

“Nearby,” Alpha answered in a nonchalant tone.

Hitoshi took a second to peek from his shelter, only to quickly pull back into hiding. The tank still seemed to know where he was; he only had seconds of safety. “Well, I could use some help! I don’t know what I’m doing!”

Alpha waved a dismissive hand. “Aw, I’m sure you’ll get it down fast.”

Panic rose in his throat. He felt the urge to hurl. “Could you at least tell me what I can do?! I’m just one guy! And that’s a tank!”

The alien was silent for only a beat. “Certainly. What kind of mentor would I be if I didn’t give you the tutorial?”

The alien paused, presumably deciding the best way to present his information. Despite being on the verge on hyperventilating, Hitoshi snorted. The way he was talking, it sounded like Alpha was some sort of videogame tutorial. But that was just silly. …Wasn’t it? Wait, what was he thinking, of course it was! This wasn’t a game! Shaking his head, he stared intently down at the screen.

"Now listen up, Bravoman. Your main ability is to stretch your limbs. Try throwing a punch to strike a distant enemy.”

“What did you call me?” Hitoshi waved his other hand quickly, brushing the thought away. “Nevermind, I’ve got bigger problems. What do you mean, ‘try throwing a punch?’ That’s a tank.”

“Your point?”

Hitoshi let out an exasperated groan and turned back to peek over his cover. The tank was still creeping ever closer, swiveling its turret in his direction at the sign of movement.

His stomach flipped. The only way he was getting out of this was a fight. Well, he could run but then someone else would have to clean up the problem. Sure, a more experienced hero would be better equipped, but how much damage would the tank cause before help arrived? This area wasn’t too busy, but what if it moved into a populated area? How many people would get hurt? Killed? Lose their homes? He’d seen the damage weapons like this could cause.

He glanced down at his fists. It sure didn’t feel like it, but maybe he had super strength or something. He mumbled, “Well, here goes nothing,” before swinging his right fist wildly.

There was a small click. His arm extended far beyond the normal reach. His fist whizzed through the air like a projectile, hitting the side of the tank with a metallic thunk.

The stretching stopped and his arm dropped limply to the ground. He couldn’t feel much of anything in his arm, save perhaps a dull ache in his knuckles. It certainly didn’t feel like he had punched a tank.

Unfortunately, the tiny little blow did little to stop it.

He should have expected as much. He was one scrawny little man against a tank. Worse still, his arm hadn’t retracted automatically. He tried to move it and succeeded in wiggling his fingers, but his arm still snaked limply across the ground.

“Bravoman, Listen Up.” Alpha was speaking through the communicator again. “Next, try a lightning fast kick.”

Hitoshi shook his head quickly. If his leg behaved like his arm had right now, he’d be in big trouble. “H-hold on now, my arm is stuck! Help me with that first!”

The alien hesitated. “Are you suuure you don’t want to go through the tutorial the normal way? I can’t promise this will be repeated later.”

Bravoman glanced back to the tank, then let out a high-pitched squeal and dropped to the ground. A projectile went sailing over his head only a second later. “I’m sure! I’m sure!

“Aww, but I was having so much fun. Very well.” There was a pause, then Alpha continued, his tone unchanging. “Let’s see. Normally you should be able to retract your arm just by thinking about it. But perhaps there’s a malfunction?”

“What do you mean malfunction?!”

“We’re dealing with technology that breaks the basic laws of matter, Bravoman. It’s bound to be imperfect sometimes. All you have to do is grab onto your arm and manually pull it back in until it’s back to normal size.”

“Why do you keep calling me that?” Hitoshi asked as he glanced at his arm. After a second of hesitation, he grabbed his limp arm and began to push it into his shoulder. Sure enough, his arm seemed to roll back inside as if he was coiling a garden hose.

Now that he looked closely, there were divided sections on his arm. Each time a section passed back into his shoulder, there was an audible click. This was very weird.

But this was also a bad time to dwell on that. The tank was preparing to fire again. With a yelp, he turned and dashed away, still retracting his arm as he went. “Come on come on come on, hurry!” His arm dangled behind him as he ran, flopping limply through the air.

“Okay, okay, okay, there’s got to be something I can do. How am I supposed to destroy a tank if I can’t just punch it to pieces?”

“Perhaps it’s time to be creative?”

Hitoshi let out a yelp and turned his head. Alpha was floating alongside him now, keeping pace.

“Creative how?” Hitoshi insisted, glancing back at the tank.

“You have all the powers of Bravoman now. Use them to their fullest potential to get past your enemies defenses.”

“Past their defenses?” Hitoshi tilted his head, eyebrows knit together. Then his eyes widened. “Oh! I think I have an idea!”

He came to a hard stop, spinning around so that he was facing the tank. It was still creeping towards him, turret swiveling as it tried to get a lock on him. He dashed towards it, occasionally weaving to one side or the other to buy time diving to the side when he was close.

If my arms can stretch, then maybe…. He shot one arm shot out. Concentrating, he made it loop around the barrel of the turret. Another thought instruction started retracting his arm, reeling him in. Except, since he was anchored to the tank, he was pulled towards it.

Just a little too late, he realized how fast he was moving. There was a metallic thunk as he banged against the side. His head swam, but his arm pulled him the rest of the way up.

It took him a moment to come to his senses, but when he did, he realized he was on top of the tank, arm still tightly wound around the barrel. The turret spun, as if trying to locate or get to him. With his free hand, he grabbed hold of a handle on the tank hatch, then let go of the turret to grab it with both hands. He planted his feet firmly on either side of the hatch cover then yanked with all his might. To his surprise it opened with little effort, making him nearly stumble and fall off. He stumbled about until he found his footing, then ducked his head inside.

Sure enough the inside of the tank was unmanned only having a handful of complex computer screens and controls. Hitoshi dropped himself inside and began to look around for an off switch. But there were so many buttons. Too many buttons. Pressing all of them seemed like a bad idea, so he did the next best thing he could think of. He brought one fist up above his head and smashed it down onto the console. There was a loud crack as the brittle metal broke apart. He repeated the attack again and again. Sparks sputtered and bounced harmlessly off his suit. Suddenly, the tank lurched to a stop, then the engine died away.

Hitoshi held his breath, waiting to see if anything would happen, then let it out when there was nothing but silence. “That could have gone so much worse,” he mumbled.

“Well done, Bravoman.”

Hitoshi yelped and spun around. Alpha was lowering into the tank behind him, arms clasped behind his back. Hitoshi moved to the side as best he could in the cramped space, giving the alien full access to the damaged console. Alpha ran a hand over the damage, then looked back at Hitoshi.

“I have to admit, I’m surprised. I expected you to bust a hull through the tank with that punch. There was certainly a dent, but that was nowhere close to what it should have been. I suppose that’s something we can discuss later.”

Hitoshi blinked, then brought a hand up to his chin and tilted his head. “Really? I feel a little stronger, but not tank-destroying strong. Maybe it’s just because I’m inexperienced?”

Alpha didn’t look up. “Perhaps.”

They were silent for a moment as Alpha continued his inspection. Eventually, when he could no longer stand the silence, Hitoshi tried to make small talk. “By the way, why do you keep calling me Bravoman? I feel like I’ve heard the name somewhere before. It sounds like a Mega Man character name.” He paused, looking over his new suit. “Now that I think about it, the costume does give me robot master vibes…”

“That’s your hero moniker,” Alpha explained. “Don’t sweat the details; we’ll discuss this in a more secure location. For now, take a look at this.” The alien turned and held up something that vaguely resembled a computer board. He pointed to a line of text near the bottom.

Hitoshi took a step back so that he was within the ring of light filtering from the hatch. “Manufactured by… Bakuda Industries?” He raised his head to look at Alpha, who seemed to stare right back. It was hard to interpret his expression when he lacked human facial features.

“Does it ring a bell?”

Shaking his head, Hitoshi replied, “Not at all. I could look it up when I get home, though.”

“That works. Speaking of which…” Alpha waved his hand in a circle before squeezing past Hitoshi and floating out of the tank. He reached down, offering the new hero a hand up. Once they were both out of the tank, he finished his train of thought. “We should head back to your home. It would be better to talk about the nature of your powers somewhere secure. And I’ll need to get settled in.”

Hitoshi nodded slowly. Then Alpha’s words sank in, and he did a double take, raising a brow. “Wait, settle in?”

“Of course, I need a place to stay if I’m going to be your mentor, after all. “I… guess that’s fine but…” Hitoshi looked away, brows knit together as he rubbed at the back of his neck. “I live in an apartment. It’s not exactly the most private place. The walls are thin enough that I hear my neighbor snoring most nights. And I don’t know how my landlord’s going to feel about moving in a roommate, let alone a roommate who’s a literal alien.”

Alpha floated over to stand beside Bravoman, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’m sure it’ll all work out.”

“That’s kind of an optimistic view but…”

“Oh, maybe I should be more clear. I think it’ll all work out, because I get the feeling this isn’t the kind of story that would get hung up on that sort of conflict. There are bigger problems coming.”

There Alpha went acting like this was some sort of story again. Hitoshi screwed his eyes shut, feeling a throbbing sensation in his temples. It felt like there was something he was missing here, but he didn’t have the energy to figure it out. “Okay fine just. Come on. No sense hanging around here. But what do we do about the tank?”

“I wouldn’t worry about that either.” Alpha waved his hand dismissively. “I get the feeling whoever put this here will be coming back for it later.”

Hitoshi tilted his head. “Shouldn’t we stick around to find out who it is?”

“We could. They could come with more firepower. It would be an exciting test of your abilities. But then we wouldn’t be able to talk about all your cool powers.

Alpha did have a point there… Hitoshi took a long moment to deliberate, weighing his options carefully. “I guess you’re right.” He hopped down from the tank and took a moment to orient himself before walking towards the setting sun. “Come on, my apartment’s this way.”
 

kintsugi

golden scars | pfp by sun
Location
the warmth of summer in the songs you write
Pronouns
she/her
Partners
  1. silvally-grass
  2. lapras
  3. golurk
  4. booper-kintsugi
  5. meloetta-kint-muse
  6. meloetta-kint-dancer
  7. murkrow
  8. yveltal
And we fight tanks! What could possibly go wrong.

I sort of love Hitoshi's general acceptance of just, these are tanks, I can punch tanks now, now my arm is super long, shit. I think in a story that's trying to take itself 100% seriously I'd be a lot more concerned about the character groundings, but this has a more comedic bent and I think you're able to play off some of that naivete as a mix of character and comedy. "But then we wouldn't get to talk about all of your cool powers"--there's a generally very cheeky tone in this story and I'm here for it, haha. Which is odd because normally I'm not a huge fan of lampshading problems, but I think so far it works because this isn't really pitching as some sort of deeper commentary on the human condition; it's about a naive kid with stretch limbs who gets his powers from a tuning fork.

(And there are still hints about deeper commentary on the human condition, and also the best jokes are funny because they're true--all this to say that you walk a delicate line here but I think you walk it very well).

Alphaman being incredibly nonchalant about this is funny and also helps sell the comedic bent, I think. If both characters were freaking out, it'd feel a lot more serious.
“Oh, maybe I should be more clear. I think it’ll all work out, because I get the feeling this isn’t the kind of story that would get hung up on that sort of conflict. There are bigger problems coming.”
genius.

(And it's true; sometimes we do get a little blinded by Aragorn's tax policy and lose sight of the forest for the trees. I think this kind of lampshading also works because it's explicitly not for things that are important to the plot).

Like an interviewee wanting to make a good first impression
I liked this description in particular. It conveys a very earnest but naive image, which I think suits Hitoshi in this moment very well. Plus it makes him feel incredibly blinkered by his corporate life, to the point that when he's talking to an alien offering him superpowers he can't help but compare this to a job interview. A really subtle way to capture a lot of content in a pretty short sentence.

A quick lookover revealed the extent of the transformation. He was wearing a green top, similar to a gymnast’s leotard, but made of a thicker material. Two thin white lines ran vertically down his chest. The space between was yellow, and was padded thicker than the rest of the top. All three stripes came to a stop at his waist, running just under a black belt with a silver buckle.

He could feel another, skintight garment underneath, which seemed to be the source of his metallic sleeves and leggings. White, sturdy, steel-toed boots complimented white gloves. A long, scarlet scarf hung past his waist. The slight tint of a visor filled his vision, and the weight of a helmet sat atop his head. He’d have to get a better look at that later
I do think the visual descriptions get a little overblown in this chapter. This is entirely up to writing school of thought, so feel free to just throw this paragraph in the trash, but in general things like "all three of the stripes came to a stop at his waist" feel better in a visual format, where the colors and lines of these characters are important to making them stand out on the page. I found the physical descriptions, such as the way the visor tints his vision or the squish of the metallic leggings on his skin, to be a lot more helpful as far as establishing a sense of physicality and character here--these feel a lot more like things someone would notice about an outfit that's just blossomed into existence on top of them.

(In general I think there are two schools of thought--describe enough of what's happening for the reader to visualize the scene, and describe enough of what's happening for the reader to understand how the character feels. This one falls more firmly in the former for me, which might've been what you were going for, but I find that these descriptions tend to hang around in my head more when they're attached to a character/emotion).

It seems like next chapter is setting up to be an explanation chapter, but tbh who knows; the fourth wall might just shatter into a bajillion pieces. Looking forward to more though!

some very brief line comments:
Pulling his hand away, Hitoshi opened it to reveal… a metal rod, a tuning fork, and a 100 yen coin? He blinked, staring at the items for a few precious seconds before tilting his head to give Alpha an incredulous look.
Unrelated to logic or my enjoyment of the story or anything--I was just curious if there was a specific reason for these items. They do seem a little too specific/story-important to be just arbitrary pocket change, but my brain is too small to see the deeper meaning here. I was thinking maybe it was all stuff that started with A or B, or like, things that are round give you superpowers in this universe? Unsure.
Panic rose in his throat. He felt the urge to hurl. “Could you at least tell me what I can do?! I’m just one guy! And that’s a tank!”
in which we learn that actions have consequences, and specifically that the action of accepting the alien's offer of getting tank-combatting superpowers does in fact mean you'll fight tanks
The alien was silent for only a beat. “Certainly. What kind of mentor would I be if I didn’t give you the tutorial?”
this has such "oh sure, I knew that, did you know that" vibes and I'm here for it.
His stomach flipped. The only way he was getting out of this was a fight. Well, he could run but then someone else would have to clean up the problem. Sure, a more experienced hero would be better equipped, but how much damage would the tank cause before help arrived? This area wasn’t too busy, but what if it moved into a populated area? How many people would get hurt? Killed? Lose their homes? He’d seen the damage weapons like this could cause.
Is there a particular reason that Alphaman doesn't help here? Or that Hitoshi doesn't wonder why Alphaman isn't helping?
His arm extended far beyond the normal reach.
Worse still, his arm hadn’t retracted automatically.
In general I think the fight scene is pretty well-detailed, but it would help in this specific bit, since the distance is the source of the tension, to know what "far beyond the normal reach" means--ten feet? Fifty?
“You have all the powers of Bravoman now. Use them to their fullest potential to get past your enemies defenses.”

“Past their defenses?” Hitoshi tilted his head, eyebrows knit together. Then his eyes widened. “Oh! I think I have an idea!”
should be "enemy's"

I also wasn't sure how "all the powers of Bravoman" actually parsed as a useful piece of information to Hitoshi
Sure enough the inside of the tank was unmanned only having a handful of complex computer screens and controls. Hitoshi dropped himself inside and began to look around for an off switch.
is this a "sure enough" thing? I didn't follow the jump from last chapter's "is this a military drill" to "these tanks are enemy combatants and I know that they're unmanned drones with off switches."
“I have to admit, I’m surprised. I expected you to bust a hull through the tank with that punch. There was certainly a dent, but that was nowhere close to what it should have been. I suppose that’s something we can discuss later.”
omg it really is just MHA
“Of course, I need a place to stay if I’m going to be your mentor, after all. “I… guess that’s fine but…” Hitoshi looked away, brows knit together as he rubbed at the back of his neck. “I live in an apartment. It’s not exactly the most private place. The walls are thin enough that I hear my neighbor snoring most nights. And I don’t know how my landlord’s going to feel about moving in a roommate, let alone a roommate who’s a literal alien.”
Dropped a paragraph/close quote between Alphaman and Hitoshi's dialogue here.
“We could. They could come with more firepower. It would be an exciting test of your abilities. But then we wouldn’t be able to talk about all your cool powers.
Dropped a closing quote here.
Alphaman has incredible chaos goblin energy and I'm here for it tbh.
 

ShiniGojira

Multiversal Extraordinaire
Location
Stranded In The Gaps between Multiverses
Pronouns
He/him/they/her
Partners
  1. froslass
  2. zorua-gojira
  3. salandit-shiny
G'day, Wind. Hope you're having a lovely day. Here's my review for the catnip.

Some thoughts to start with:

I'm not very familiar with the source material but your version makes me want to read it just because of the characters, their interactions, their thoughts and how their interesting world. The first chapter is written in such a way that it's easy to get someone hooked.

Phillip said, waving a dismissive hand.He leaned down to thump the back of his hand against Hiroshi's monitor
I don't know if you want this sort of feedback or not but you seem to be missing a space after the first period, and you're missing a period after monitor.
Suddenly, a cry for help reaches his ears. He springs from his vantage point, following the noise until he finds a group of thugs harassing a hapless citizen. With a growl in his throat, he leaps into battle, getting a surprise first strike as he knocks one of them out with a clean punch! He spins around, only to-
A fun way to start. Love how Hito spends his time daydreaming about being a hero.
The house had been collateral damage in a clash between a local hero-villain duo, something that seemed to be unnaturally common around the city.
So it seems like a regular occurrence for super-powered beings to fight each other. I honestly thought this story was one of those 'there's only one hero versus a platoon of villain' kind, but it seems like it's similar to marvel or DC comics.
Where were the other civilians? What if someone was hurt? What if he could help them?
Love how his thoughts were to immediately on saving people, speaks a lot about his character.
The alien tilted to the side slightly, almost as if he was trying to tilt his head. Then he waved a dismissive hand. “Oh, don’t worry about that, we don’t have the kind of wordcount to get into that right now.”
Alpha's a wall-breaker, eh? How fun. I love seeing the creative things a writer can do with characters that can break the fourth wall.
Alpha seemed to stare at him a moment longer, then he twisted to reach into some sort of bag-like accessory that hung from his hip. “Well, Hitoshi, I have an offer for you that I hope you’ll take.” He pulled his hand from the bag, holding something in his fist. One last glance was spared towards the tank, then faced Hitoshi and offered out his hand. “Tell me. Have you ever wanted to be a superhero?”
So this is how Hitoshi gets his powers. A bit unusual 'cause I thought Alpha was going to be a villain here, nice to see that he isn't. (that or maybe he just wants someone to fight)

An interesting first chapter, would definitely check this out once there's more chapters.

Take care! And keep doing what you love!
 

Umbramatic

The Ghost Lord
Location
The Yangverse
Pronouns
Any
Partners
  1. reshiram
Here for Review Blitz! An obscure fandom huih? I've been there. -stares wistfully into distance- I've been there. I read Chapter 1.

So your protagonist is daydreaming on the job I see,. I've ALSO been there. Poor guy has to deal with an asshole boss. No wonder he's relieved when he gets off the clock. One hell of a nine to five job. Everyone around him is sick of it too. It really highlights just sick of his life this guy is and how much it sets up for later.

But then it's off the frying pan and into the fire for him! Literally. the street is on fire. And there's a tank. And a weird alien. And said alien wants to give him superpowers. I don' trust like that. But knowing how these things play out he's going to take the plunge isn't he? Sick of his life and wants to be a hero and all that. Sure this alien is untrustworthy and is being chased by tanks but -insert small price to pay for salvation gif here-

So far I'm not really suffering fro m "this is an obscure fandom and so I have no clue what is going on." Everything is proceeding in a way I cann understand. You say this is a novelezation of thecomic, which probvably helps.

It does make me wonder more about the original comic. Is it a webcomic? Some obscure manga? Some nesar lost media barely saved from being lost to the sands of time? Where can I read it? If your fandom needs to bigger I'm considering helping. :P

But cute fic so far! Curious how it plays out.
 

Namohysip

Dragon Enthusiast
Staff
Partners
  1. flygon
  2. charizard
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. sceptile
  6. marowak
  7. jirachi
I don't know a whole lot about this series, but I'm going to treat it kind of like original fiction. Since this is written to be an adaptation of things, it should be pretty close if I don't know the context at all, right?

Anyway, this is going to be a stream-of-consciousness review with overall thoughts at the end, since I seem to get my thoughts down the most thoroughly that way.

One thing of note is that there seems to be a few grammar issues that I first noticed near the beginning with comma usage or dialogue. For example, a "He said" after a period from the prior dialogue, when it should be a comma and a lowercase h, or an action rather than a tag if it's a separate sentence.

That brief passage of him walking down the hall with his coworkers nearby and the one line about nobody smiling was probably the best spot where I had a firm idea on what his current life was like. It's definitely setting up some kind of Isekai, I think.

And not long after, action already begins! With a TANK! Well, that's one way to get things started! Not quite an Isekai, but pretty close to it. Going straight into being a superhero for unknown reasons, but known to Alpha Man. I particularly liked the comment about casually avoiding tank fire, since it helped give a visual of what was going on during all that.

Alpha Man definitely had a strong introduction as being quirky and polite but very uncanny. Basically a friendly alien. We will see how long that lasts, but it's hard to tell so early in

Chapter 2 rolls around, he just goes through a "magical girl" transformation and even acknowledged it as such! I particularly liked how talking as a free action didn't work here, and he straight up got blasted for it. Which doubled as a demonstration of how much stronger he became from becoming a superhero. Now the question is how effective he would be as a hero!

This does a pretty good job at depicting action despite being in written form, which is definitely not something that is easy to do! The nods to video game genre in their real world also help to give a sense of what kind of story it's meant to be, too. I wonder if "Bravo Man" is some kind of code name, or an incarnation of someone else in the past that this alien knew. The way Alpha Man speaks of it suggests it's either an invention of his, or the powers of someone he once knew.

These were a charming two chapters. It's a totally different feel than what I'm used to, but it also establishes itself as that right on so it's easy to accept. That's how you can get away with premises and tone at least. We even got the first fight to establish what he's capable of already, too! Now comes the chapter where some explaining is done, and probably a hint or two about what the main plot is, which we've already gotten from the person who made that tank. I do wonder what kind of force would normally try to go against this, unless it's a superhero only kind of deal.

Anyway, that was a good read, and I'm glad I ventured into non-Pokemon territory for it!
 

Panoramic_Vacuum

Hoenn around
Partners
  1. aggron
  2. lairon
Ah, of course, all in a day's work for our new hero. (And thank you for the clarification on my mafia-character mix up, though I imagine Anti-Bravoman might be kind of similar to Hitoshi himself? If he's kind of an opposite/counterpart?) In any case, we get our first look at Hero!Hitoshi! And it's just as baffling and outlandish as it felt like it should be. Walking home from work, having a strange alien approach you, and then having super hero costumes and powers literally thrust into your hands, all while being shot at by a tank? That's a tough first day on the job.

I laughed so hard at this quote, because right before that I was like "wow he went full magical anime girl transformation" and then lo and behold:
Letting out a light laugh, he brought a peace sign to his forehead in a rough impression of a Sailor Moon pose. “Is this what it feels like to go through a magical girl transformation?
A+ humor yet again, it's the gift that keeps on giving. I'm curious, when did this series come out? The overall design for Bravoman has a really interesting vibe to it that makes me want to guess some time in the 70s or 80s, though maybe it came out more recently and was styled after some of those retro comics.

Your main ability is to stretch your limbs.
I did not expect that to be his power, very cool! I agree with Hitoshi that the whole thing felt very "Mega Man", what with maybe some blasters and cool bubble armor and the potential of some cool elemental powers, but stretchy gomu-gomu-no limbs? Wild! Though maybe a bit more machine-like, with the segments and the clicking. Alien technology be crazy, man.

Alphaman is the quirky and peculiar cherry on top of this quirky and peculiar sundae, and it's great. The constant fourth wall breaking, using words like tutorial, and referencing things like skipping the proper order of things, like it's a video game (Hitoshi speedrunner-man confirmed??) They're funny and lighthearted, and I genuinely laughed out loud at them flat out inviting themselves to live at Hitoshi's apartment.

The mystery about the tank is intriguing, and I like how creative Hitoshi got with his new powers for how scary and surprising this whole situation was. Glad it was unmanned, so he can beat up on some machines and not like, another person (at least for now). I also like that Bravoman isn't super OP right out of the gate, it's the right kind of amateurish feel to a brand new, very unlikely super hero. It's exciting to see how Hitoshi grows into his new Bravoman shaped boots!
 
3. The Obligatory Exposition Chapter

windskull

Bidoof Fan
Staff
Partners
  1. sneasel-nip
  2. bidoof
  3. absol
  4. kirlia
  5. windskull-bidoof
  6. little-guy-windskull
  7. purugly
  8. mawile
Hi all! I'll try to reply to reviews sometime in the future! Mobile posting is a drag.

For now... Well, hopefully the next chapter doesn't take 1.5 years to come out.

3. The Obligatory Exposition Chapter
"Hey Alpha, I just thought of a problem."

"Oh?"

Hitoshi slowed to a stop at a street corner, watching as a handful of cars sped by, he caught one or two drivers gaping at him as they passed. And therein laid the problem.

"Well it's just…" he waved his hands around. "Like I said, I live in an apartment. How am I supposed to explain… all this?" He waved at himself. Then the crosswalk turned, and he stepped off into the street. "I mean. Superheroes keep their identity secret for a reason. Several, actually."

He began to list off on his fingers. "For one thing, it keeps their civilian life and hero life separate. Some superheroes are practically celebrities. If people knew who they were, they'd never know a moment's peace. Then there's the safety issue. Revealing your identity is a safety risk, both to you and your loved ones. And there's a degree of protection from liability for damages. Trust me, nothing will get you in more personal trouble than letting people figure out your identity."

"I see," Alpha answered. "I think I may have a solution." Suddenly, Alpha yanked Bravoman to the side, leading him across the parking lot of one of the local coffee shops.

"Woah, woah, woah! Where are we going?"

Alpha didn't reply right away, instead, he stopped next to the cafe's dumpster, doing a quick scan of their surroundings before ducking to the side. "We shouldn't be visible to the street here. Let me show you how to deactivate your suit."

Reaching forward, the alien grabbed Bravoman by both sides of his helmet, applying slight pressure. Then he pulled it off. At once, his suit briefly glowed white, then dissolved into motes of light. All that was left was a round, blue device with a button in the center, small enough to fit into the palm of his hand.

"There's two buttons on either side of the helmet. Press both of them at the same time and remove the suit to deactivate it. Press this button anytime you need the suit. Understand?"

"Well enough." Hitoshi said with a nod. "But what about you?"

Alpha brought a hand up to his… chin? Face? Hitoshi had given up figuring that mess out. "Could I not pass as one of your Earth cosplayers?"

"You know about that?"

"I had some spare time to look at your Earth internet on the flight here."

Hitoshi considered for a moment, then decided it wasn't worth arguing over. "Well, maybe if you walk instead of floating about. But if this is going to work out, then people are bound to recognize you eventually."

"Yes, but that's not now." Alpha waved a dismissive hand. "We'll cross that bridge when we get there. Unless you're not interested, of course. I can always find someone else that could fit the suit.”

“Nono!” Hitoshi stammered, surprising himself with the strength of his rebuttal. “I’m interested! I’m just trying to look at this logically! And this still doesn't solve the issue of you being seen with me."

"Well then, why don't you run on home and I'll follow at a distance?"

Hitoshi sensed this was the best compromise he was going to get. "Fine. I'll see you in a few minutes, I guess?"

Slipping the alien device into his pocket, Hitoshi scampered away and back onto the main street. As he walked the last half-mile to his apartment complex, he couldn't help but glance over his shoulder every dozen steps or so.

Was this really a good idea? He'd jumped into the situation without too much forethought. But here he was, about to invite a strange alien into his home. There were so many ways this could go wrong, even outside of the issue of keeping his new super powers a secret.

On the other hand, Alpha did just give him sweet new powers. And if he gained enough notoriety, he could quit his job. Buy a house. Pay off his student loans. And buy all the comics and games he could ever want.

That settled it. If Alpha was secretly evil and tricking him, he’d take the risk. The chance for financial freedom far outweighed the danger.

With a spring in his step, he scurried across the parking lot and bounded up the stairs. He patted down his pockets until he felt his keys, then fumbled them in his hurry to open the door. As he flipped on the light switch and slid off his shoes just inside, his eyes caught sight of a pile of dirty dishes in the sink, then swept over a handful of old take-out containers on the coffee table by his couch.

Embarrassment flooded his mind; he could only imagine what his parents would say about guest etiquette. Bringing Alpha into a messy house? Unthinkable! He dashed to the table, scooping up as many of the boxes as he could carry, leaving behind his laptop and a few comic books. Trash, trash, everything in the trash. Had he swept recently? Oh man, he hoped Alpha didn’t notice any dust bunnies.

Then there was the matter of the sink. At least he’d had the sense to scrape off any old food beforehand, but the lack of a dishwasher meant he wouldn’t be getting these done in time. At least he could put them on to soak?

The quiet hiss of the sink filled the small apartment, hot steam rising as soapy water filled the basin. He waited just long enough for the water to cover all his dishes, then turned away.

"Alright, what next?"

His attention turned to his clothes. Office attire certainly wasn't comfortable. Hardly what he'd normally wear at home. Oh, but maybe he should keep it on? He did have a guest, after all.

And then there was the matter of food. What did aliens eat? Did they eat? Did Alpha even have a mouth? Or was that opening his eye? Ugh, too many questions, not enough answers!

Before he had a chance to dwell on dinner options, the doorbell rang. Right. No more time, he'd just have to leave things as they were. Hopefully his home was presentable enough.

Dusting himself off, he strode back to the door and opened it.

"Ah yes, hello random earth citizen that I've certainly never seen before."

Hitoshi stared, his expression flattening. "Yeah, you're not fooling anyone like that." He sighed then stepped aside so that Alpha Man could float inside.

"Make yourself at home, I guess. I need to change clothes. Are you hungry?"

"How generous of you." Alpha waved a hand like a shy school girl. "But I already ate earlier."

Right, well, that was one less thing to worry about. Quietly, Hitoshi slipped into a room just to the side, returning a moment later in a navy t-shirt and a pair of sweats.

“Is this the collected adventures of Batman?”Alpha Man asked him before he had a chance to return to the kitchen. Hitoshi caught him flipping through an omnibus that he'd left on the coffee table. “A fascinating hero, truly. I read up all about him on your Earth internet while still up in orbit.”

“Ah, really?” Hitoshi ducked into the kitchen, pulling a pack of frozen vegetables from the freezer and a pot from under the stove. He dropped in the veggies and poured in water, turning the stove on to boil and setting a packet of ramen to the side. No need to be fancy tonight. Besides, he was saving that money for hobbies. “Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but Batman isn’t real.”

“Really?” Alpha tilted his head.

“I’m afraid so,” Hitoshi confirmed. “Well, technically he’s based on a real hero from the thirties, but everything from the comic is greatly exaggerated. And thank goodness for that! I’d hate to live in a world where Gotham was real. We have enough problems as it is.”

The sound of bubbling water reached his ears, so he turned to drop in the ramen. "Anyways, what's the deal with these powers? Why come to Earth?"

"Well, I needed someone that could fit in the costume. You happened to be just the right fit." Alpha spun around and plopped onto the couch, draping one arm across the armrest. "My people are in search of a champion. But don't worry about that for now."

"So you gave me the suit so you could take me to your planet for something? Guess I shouldn't be too surprised. Hey wait." He pointed a finger at Alpha. "You're not planning to probe me are you? I didn't agree to that."

"No, no, that isn't really my people's M.O."

Hitoshi let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank god. You said not to worry about it for now. Why? Do you need to train me or something?"

"Perhaps. But that isn't why I'm holding off. According to my understanding, you should have been able to smash that tank apart with a single punch. You're not at full power, and we need to figure out what you're missing, and see if we can restore it, before I take you off-planet."

Hitoshi knit his brows together. He was saved from the need to immediately respond by the need to take his food off the stove. He dumped the ramen into a bowl and took it over to the couch sitting at the opposite end from Alpha. Pointing at Alpha with his utensil, he asked, "Do you have any idea why the suit wouldn't be at full power?"

"Not really," Alpha admitted with a shrug of his shoulders. "There could be all sorts of reasons, perhaps there was a malfunction with the signal, or interference. Or perhaps the suit has a virus. Let's hope it's not the last one. The last thing you want is your body being hijacked."

"Wait, that can happen?"

Alpha shrugged again. "Who knows?"

"Wow, that's reassuring." Hitoshi rolled his eyes. He wanted to be excited about having powers. And he still kind of was. But Alpha was making it really difficult to stay enthused.

Hoping to lighten the mood, he asked, "I guess the next question is, what am I supposed to be able to do?"

Alpha seemed to perk up. "That I can answer. You should have greatly enhanced strength, far more than you already displayed. And then, of course, the limb extension abilities. You should be able to stretch your arms, legs, and neck at will. And your suit has an underwater torpedo assault mode. You can access it by pressing the button on your belt." He paused for a second. "I don't recommend activating it outside of water."

He tapped the base of his dome. “Other than that, you should also be more durable than the average human when wearing the suit. A hero needs to be able to take a punch, yes? And there is something else, but I was advised to let you figure that one out by yourself. Something about not breaking the human mind.

Hitoshi opened his mouth to interrupt, but Alpha just kept plowing through. "There may be a few add-ons to the suit as well, but I’ll need to review the manual.”

“There’s a manual? ”

“Of course. There’s always a manual with new technology, right? Not that I ever read it. Nobody reads those things. Or was that the safety warnings I ignored?”

That was disconcerting. Shaking his head, he sat aside his food and instead picked up his laptop from the table. "Let's talk about something else, why don't we? Let me see if I can find anything on 'Bakuda Industries.' There's got to be something out there, right?"

Alas, as his fingers glided across the keyboard, his first search of "bakuda" flooded him with results about a web serial he'd never heard of. Adding "industries" to the end produced more mixed results, but he still struggled to sift through what might be useful and what was useless.

"Whoever this is, it looks like they've tried to limit their online footprint," he finally groaned, sitting the laptop aside and returning to his food.

"Don't be too surprised, if they're out to cause trouble they wouldn't want to be caught so easily. I'll look into it later." Given his usual monotone, Alpha came across as disinterested in actually following up. Hitoshi wasn't sure if he should say anything about that, so he jumped subjects again.

"Well, I'm going to play some Final Fantasy, if you want to watch. You're free to crash in here for tonight. And tomorrow. There might be an issue if you stay beyond the weekend. Rent and all that." He sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. He'd only had his powers for a few hours, but already things like rent seemed so small. Already, he was getting used to the idea of an alien in his bedroom.

And as he turned on the TV and his PlayStation 4, he found his anxieties about the situation melting further away. Yeah. There were things to worry about, sure. But he had plenty of time to figure it out.

For now, he could lose himself in a world of fantasy.
 
4. Elsewhere...

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4. Elsewhere...​

Blue light flooded a dark room from an array of monitors, casting the contents in stark contrast. A lone figure stood at the center, fingers Blue Blue light flooded a dark room from an array of monitors, casting the contents in stark contrast. A lone figure stood at the center, drumming their left-hand fingers against a desk. In place of their right hand, a metallic claw clacked against the surface, creating the only other source of sound aside from the quiet hum of electronics.

Thick, round glasses reflected the light back as the man took in information from the screens: photos and video footage of a damaged tank, now surrounded by caution tape, and a slew of cops that scrambled about like ants.

His lip twisted into a snarl as he reached a hand up to stroke at his perfectly manicured beard. Pathetic, the lot of them.

He heard a click from behind, then the sound of a door sliding open. Warm light flooded in from the hall, accompanied by the sound of a mechanical whirr. The round dome of a floating robot — similar in size and shape to a football — entered his field of vision.

From its glossy yellow exterior came the sound of static, then it spoke in a monotonous, electronic voice.

"The by-product has been contained, sir. Though I must regretfully inform you of the loss of binja unit 070, which was crushed in the process."

Silence. The tapping stopped. Without turning to acknowledge the robot, the man moved his arms behind his back, eyes still glued to the screens. "Are you seeing this, Hoverbot?"

The robot did not answer at first, turning to point its visor in the direction of the screen array. "Is that the prototype tank, Sir? I take it the attempt to catch the alien signal failed, then?"

"Indeed." He raised his claw to point to one of the screens, showing a grainy photo of an alien dressed in pale yellow and with a white, dome-shaped head. "It is seeming likely this one called for help. The video feed was lost shortly after this moment."

He lowered his arm, pointing to another still. Heavier static coated the screen, but the figure of a scrawny, albeit well-dressed, man clearly stood next to the alien.

"I have been moving operations here due to low density of superheroes and the supernatural. And what am I immediately encountering? Men of an extraterrestrial nature! Hoverbot, this is inconceivable!"

"Yes, it is statistically rather improbable, isn't it? According to my current records, there is only one registered hero in New Neo Kyoto, and I have no reason to believe she was involved in this incident. Of course, the registry doesn't cover any vigilantes."

The robot whirled around the man, turning so that it was facing him at eye level. "What would you like me to do, sir?"

The man considered for a moment, before brushing his hands along the front of his tailored beige suit. "Prepare units zero through fifty for marching on downtown. We are wanting to flush out this new hero and alien invader for study. Show them our might."

"Of course, I will start preparations immediately. And what of the byproduct?"

"Ah, yes, that one." He turned his attention back to the monitors, closing out a few of the photos and replacing them with a blank text document. With a press of his claw, the computer began to record his voice, translating it into text on the screen. "I wish to be keeping it alive for now. Keep it contained but make sure its basic needs are met. There will be time for studying it later."

"Of course, sir. An excellent decision as always." Before the man could say anything more, the bot flew off, back through the open door. It shut the door behind itself, plunging the man once again into darkness.

His attention turned back to the footage. There were sure to be special forces on the case soon. A battle tan was hardly a subtle way to subdue an alien. No matter. There was little information they'd be able to gain from his technology. Of that much he was certain.

As he watched, his lips parted to form a wide, wicked grin. "soon," he began, placing his arms behind his back. "Soon I shall go public. Then all will fear the destructive hand of Doctor Bomb."

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