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Pokémon [One-Shot] Exploded View

Exploded View

Negrek

Play the Rain
Staff
Content Warnings: None
Summary: Finals are hard enough when you aren't waking in the middle of the night, thinking about aliens. Six more days until the end of the semester--Kalea doesn't know if she's going to make it.
Author's Notes: This one-shot was written as a Blitz prize for kintsugi. The prompt was "blacephalon." Pen also wrote a fic based on the same prompt, "Head Over Heels", which you should totally check out, especially if you enjoy seeing how different writers interpret the same prompt, love a little horror-comedy, or love and/or hate clowns.

Exploded View

Kalea woke to an explosion, a bang that felt like it lifted her an inch from her bed. She was reaching for her shoes before she'd even properly come awake, mouthing Gunther's name.

Her shoes weren't there. The room was silent and dark, not even moonlight showing through blackout curtains. No one wondered at the noise, no one ran for the exit.

Kalea slumped back against her pillow with a groan. Right. All in her head. It had taken months for her to stop keeping her shoes bedside overnight, to accept that she'd have no reason to be sprinting out of the dorm in darkness. To fully absorb that she'd left the explosions at home. All of them.

Kalea rubbed her face and stared around the room. Niki was facedown in the other bed, breathing peacefully. It was late, then. Or early. Whatever. Huge faces loomed out of the gloom above the other girl's bed, actors Kalea wouldn't recognize even in daylight gracing posters for movies she'd never seen, most of them framed by explosions of their own. Thick books with strange acronyms on the spines were stacked haphazardly on Niki's desk, floor, hamper.

Kalea had taped pictures above her bed for times like these. It was too dark to properly make them out, but Kalea knew them all by heart anyway, could imagine each scene as her eyes traced its indistinct shadows. Aunt Luna, Chase, and Gunther, of course. Pictures of the farm and Kalea's favorite spot on the island, the hillside where the tassely red-flowered trees grew. In the middle not a photo but a curling, many-colored piece of quill-work, the biggest she'd completed back in high school.

Kalea sighed and contemplated whether it was worth it to try and get back to sleep. Now that she was properly awake she could tell the radiator was acting up again, turning the room to desert and leaching every scrap of moisture from her mouth. She felt around blearily for her water bottle with one hand, reached for the textbook down by her feet with the other. Galarian history might put her back to sleep, and if not, she could stand to review some anyway.

--​

"Exploding head syndrome?" Niki eyed Kalea askance, as though wondering whether she'd somehow missed a radical change in her roommate's appearance. "That sounds, uh... I mean, are you going to be okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. It's nothing serious, just kind of annoying. And it usually only shows up when I'm stressed. So, finals, you know..."

"Ouch. Exactly when you really need your sleep," Niki said hypocritically. Her eyes were sunk deep in bruise-colored circles, and Kalea was pretty sure the wrinkled black T-shirt she was wearing was the same one she'd had on yesterday and possibly also slept in. Still, Niki's eyes were as bright and intent as ever as she went on, "Well. At least it's less than a week, right? Then you can head home and not even think about any of this nonsense for a month."

"Yeah." A week away from getting on a plane and getting out of the cold and dark at last. There had been more snow last night, and the dining hall's floor was a gritty, slushy mess spotted with disintegrating napkins and dropped food. More snow, and here she was, hoping to catch a flight soon... Kalea sighed.

"Hey. You okay?" Niki asked. "You could, like, go to the health center and book a hypnosis appointment, or...?"

"I'll be fine."

"Okay." Niki sounded unconvinced. She fiddled with her spoon for a moment, then went on, "Sometimes things like the, uh, explodey thing, they kind of show up as reminders to, like, slow down, you know? Take it easy for a bit. Yeah, finals and all, but don't push yourself too hard, okay?"

Easy for her to say, Kalea thought with a pang of resentment. Niki would glance at her notes a couple of hours before her exams and then get A's no matter what.

"Anyway." It was Niki's turn to sigh now. "I should get back. My Cooperative Programming project's due tomorrow, and Blade's still rejecting my mod. Thinks the fins aren't cool enough." She pointed her spoon at Kalea. "Don't forget: dinner Monday. It's chicken nugget night. You can't miss that!"

Kalea made vague noises of acknowledgement, and Niki buzzed off back to the dorms. Kalea still had plenty of company; not far away was a big group of mostly-pokémon that had pushed a couple tables together and was loudly gossiping about the basketball team. Most people were dining alone, though, or accompanied only by textbooks. One boy a couple tables over was having a plate of sauceless, buttery spaghetti and orange Jell-o with a side of what looked like Biology notes.

That should probably be Kalea. She gathered up her swishy, new-smelling coat and prepared to brave the cold.

A week. Six days. She could keep it together for six days. No more explosions.

--​

But Kalea's feet led her to the greenhouse instead of to her textbooks. That's where she'd find Laka, who had to be even more homesick than Kalea was, confined to the greenhouse and the adjoining biology building for the last three weeks. The comfey would wilt immediately in winter cold. Still, Laka insisted she didn't want to be sent back to Alola. She looked as cheerful as ever now, floating above a potted cluster of knobbly, ancient-looking conifers.

Kalea took a deep breath of the warm, humid air and felt herself relax. Almost like home. Laka floated over, chirping a bright greeting, overflowing with the scent of vanilla.

"How have you been doing?" Kalea asked. "It must be crazy around here with finals and all." Nearby a boy in an expensive-looking polo shirt smeared with mud was chasing baby bulbasaur around, in and out under tables, trying to take their temperatures.

Laka hummed serenely, and the air filled with the smell of lilac. Laka communicated almost entirely through scent, which Kalea considered lucky. The comfey was a lot easier to figure out than something like a pikachu, where you literally couldn't hear half their vocalizations. On the flip side, Laka was a lot less intense than someone like Blade, who was constantly blowing up Niki's phone with bad math jokes. Kalea could tell what Laka was saying, more or less, but it wasn't the same as talking to another human. And that was, actually, kind of nice.

Laka's fragrance changed to something more citrus, inviting. Wanting to know why Kalea was visiting.

"Oh, you know. Just seeing how you're doing," Kalea said. "Are you all ready to go home? It's less than a week now."

Laka kept putting out that orangey scent. Well, okay. Dumb question. It wasn't like the comfey had to pack.

Kalea sighed and crossed her arms. "All right. I had an episode last night. That's the first one in a long time."

Laka's scent changed to something mintier and somehow sympathetic. "You don't need to do anything. You should stay here, where it's warm." It was warm in Kalea's dorm room--too warm, usually, with the radiator going full blast no matter what anyone did to it. But Kalea couldn't bear the thought of Laka trapped in such a tiny space. At least now she could roam the whole greenhouse, which was full of students and pokémon and growing things besides.

Laka squealed and flopped down around Kalea's head the way she always used to. "It's all right. Really," Kalea said. This close up, Laka's scent was overwhelming, complexly floral and always shifting, one second fruity, the next vinegarish, then on to meaty, somehow, and on and on and on. Kalea figured she was getting some kind of complicated lecture in Comfey.

"It's just weird, I guess," Kalea went on after taking a few deep, steadying breaths of fragrance. "I thought I was over being homesick, but now I can't stop thinking--it's stupid. Who gets nostalgic about aliens?"

Laka twittered, releasing a subtle blend of perfumes that Kalea couldn't even begin to interpret.

"I guess it's just one more thing," Kalea said. "Like I don't have enough stress already, you know?"

Laka chirred and released a heavy wave of scent, and Kalea inhaled deeply, the way she'd been taught when Laka first joined her. The way she'd done in the middle of the night that first time she'd woken in a panic, thinking the ceiling was about to fall on her. Laka had been there before, and she'd been there after, too, after the doctor had figured out what was going on, after the attacks slowed and then petered out. Breathing the Aromatherapy in, Kalea was five years old again, alone with her friend in the dark, fear evaporating into orchard-scented air.

Except she wasn't, of course. After a moment Kalea became aware of the curious aipom edging closer, the beautifly hovering not far behind. The bulbasaur babies had fallen still, and the student who'd been chasing them likewise, staring slack-jawed up at Laka.

"Okay, right," Kalea said, jerking her attention back to the present. "Thanks for the talk, Laka. I'll be back to see you tomorrow, okay?"

Laka trilled and spun in place, petals brushing feather-light across Kalea's forehead and the overpowering Aromatherapy dissipating to leave behind a faintly earthy smell of affirmation.

The cold air outside was an even worse shock than usual after the greenhouse's warmth. Kalea stuffed her hands deep into her pockets and ducked her head against the wind, which carried with it a few treacherous spinning snowflakes. Laka had seemed almost pleased to hear about the return of Kalea's old, annoying medical condition. Some kind of comfey thing, maybe. Laka might be happiest with a problem to treat. Kalea tried to put the matter out of her mind and hurried towards the library, where she should have headed in the first place.

--​

Kalea woke again with heart hammering, head blaring with eclipsing noise. All was peaceful. All was still. Niki's keyboard clattered, and as Kalea lay quiet, waiting for her pulse to slow, she caught a faint thread of upbeat music. Niki kept her headphones up loud.

Kalea closed her eyes for a few seconds, then slapped a palm against the bedspread in frustration. She wasn't getting back to sleep, was she? Instead she got up and went to the window, pulling back the blackout curtain to look out. It had snowed. A lot. No distinction remained between path and lawn; bushes were smooth lumps barely rising above the surface of the snow, trees clotted tangles of white and twig, branches bent down in supplication.

Outside it was utterly still save for a dusty curtain of still-falling snowflakes. A lazy, spotty scattering, nothing like the wall of snow that had thrashed the courtyard earlier, thickening the air to white. Kalea stood watching for a long moment, but nothing outside changed. Everything lay frozen below the flat black clouded sky and the orange wash of lamps that marked where the path was supposed to be.

A sudden impulse seized Kalea, and she let the curtain fall back, rummaged in her closet, and threw her jacket on straight over her pajamas. Her boots were already by the door.

Niki gave no sign of noticing. Her screen was gray-on-black computer stuff, Blade bobbing in one corner. As Kalea watched, the Porygon2 prodded a couple lines of code, then wedged its nose under one and, with a flick, sent it spinning off the screen. Niki cursed under her breath and started typing faster.

Kalea left their room and went down the stairs, out to where the side door's overhang had kept a patch of sidewalk bare. The snow stretched ahead of her, thick and smooth and nearly up to her knees. A few snowflakes filtered down, completely silent. An unnatural sort of hush gripped the air, one without the sound of waves or insects or lizards to fill it. Everything around was cold, and still, and dead.

Kalea stood with arms crossed in the door's orange halogen glow, remembering.

Waking in the middle of the night with roaring in her ears. A bang that shook the house, setting the mobile above her head turning slowly. She was out of bed and pulling on shoes long before Auntie yelled, "Kalea! It's the damn aliens again! Scaring the wooloo, I never..."

"I'm coming, Aunt Luna!" Kalea called over another volley of crackles and bangs. The house was dark, lit intermittently by flares of multicolored light. Kalea grabbed the bag of Beast Balls kept ready by the front door and slipped out into the yard.

There was no need to wake Gunther, who stood just outside, snarling bursts of flame. With Chase gone on his journey, Kalea was the only one light enough to fly him out to the cape. That's always where the trouble was, some kind of thinness in reality or strange weather conditions or a hidden signal that attracted aliens, whatever it was.

Gunther crouched to let Kalea board, his scales rough and jabby on the bare skin her nightdress left exposed. The salamence was in the air before Kalea even settled herself properly, raging away in the direction of the intruder, as mad as anyone to have been woken up.

They flew over neat rows of pineapples and beans beneath a sky filled with streaking energy rockets, shimmering bursts of light and sound. The wooloo pasture below was full of unhappy round shapes, clustered in one corner as far from the alien as they could get, bleating and complaining in their reedy, scratchy voices.

Kalea had to throw her arms around Gunther's neck as he stooped into a dive. The alien stood just ahead, glowing garishly against the green of the scrub and the ocean's mirror surface. Too tall and thin for the kind of gravity Kalea was used to, yet disturbingly familiar in its clownlike way. No face, nothing like eyes or mouth, but it did have what indisputably was a head, a glowing orb nearly as tall as Kalea was, swirled with greens and pinks and blues. While Kalea watched the alien plucked its head from its shoulders and tossed it high into the air--not at Gunther, but the shockwave of the explosion that followed forced the salamence out of his smooth dive. The air filled with showers of multicolored sparks, and Kalea's ears rang as she threw one arm up to protect her face from the spinning lights.

The air around the alien was full of angry pikipek jeering and dive-bombing the creature, and Kalea thought she saw a yungoos biting at its ankles far below. The wildies weren't having much luck, as often flying straight through the alien's body as landing hits. Energy bursts popped and crackled amidst the circling birds or came rocketing at Gunther, but Kalea didn't think the alien was trying to drive them off. It threw as many attacks into empty patches of sky, its movements fluid and unhurried, conducting its fireworks show to music no one else could hear.

This kind of alien always showed up at night, presumably so its fireworks shone properly. Could it tell when it was nighttime in this world, knew just when to cross over? Or did this kind of alien show up in daytime, too, and then lie low until their moment to perform? Was it the same alien always coming back, drawn to this place by some otherworldly logic, or a parade of them, one by one finding this same spot for their fireworks? Kalea didn't mind, one way or the other. It was annoying, being woken in the middle of the night, but at least that had a purpose now. The alien was docile, and its fireworks were pretty. Kalea much preferred it to the little papercraft-looking ones, deadly sharp and zippy.

Gunther banked, recovered from the shock of the explosion, and Kalea reached into the bag of Beast Balls. These usually worked pretty well, as long as they hit, and she'd had lots of opportunity to practice her aim. The alien had better start wrapping up its performance. In a couple of minutes it would be locked in one of these balls, soon to be sent off to Ula'Ula and from there on home.

The alien had pulled its head off again and was rolling it from one arm to the other, up and over its now-empty shoulders. Kalea tried not to be distracted by the hypnotic swirling of the alien's lights or thoughts of what kind of fireworks would emerge when it tossed the orb this time. She cocked her arm back, concentrating...

Kalea had been thinking for so long that the cold had crawled down into her bones. She stared out across the featureless snow, still wondering. How long had it been since she'd even thought about aliens?

Well, there was no reason to around here, was there? It was nice not to be up in the middle of the night, trying to aim pokéballs while riding a pokémon in flight. And yet... and yet. It felt like there was some thought, some realization, hanging just out of her reach, drifting clear and icy through the air along with the last snowflakes.

A few people had emerged from nearby dorms, taking in the new-fallen snow. A purrloin bounded across the crust nearby, so light it didn't break through; whoops sounded from somewhere in the darkness, people sledding on snow-buried paths, maybe, or having a snowball fight. Kalea thought that's what you did with snow, based on movies.

In front of another dorm someone bundled to anonymity slogged purposely through the snow, dragging a long furrow behind them. Kalea watched for a few seconds, wondering what were they doing. But as the person made a turn and started slogging back the other way, it struck her: ah, yes. Drawing a dick.

Kalea sighed and looked up into the clearing sky, where the moon now shone through a gauzy screen of cloud. She wanted to visit Laka, had an irrational desire to talk aliens and flowers and childhood memories with her, but the greenhouse was closed, Laka would be sleeping, and all of that would be there for her in the morning. She probably ought to head back to bed. There was another final tomorrow, if all the snow hadn't wiped it from the schedule.

--​

Niki would be going home first, with no finals at all on Thursday. But only if she could find her other shoe.

Kalea watched her roommate digging around under the bed. Candy wrappers and crumpled course notes came tumbling out in irregular spurts. Laka hung in the air near Kalea's head, humming gently to herself and swaying to unheard music.

Niki's mouth was going all the while, of course. "...always was a soft grader. You've got nothing to worry about. And the weather's supposed to be good tomorrow, so--oh! Oh. Spoon." Indistinct rustling.

"Are you sure you don't want help? I could move some of those books for you," Kalea said.

"No no no no. Go have your dinner. I'll catch you next semester. You'll be all right, right?"

"Yes, of course." Laka murmured something, too, in a gentle honeysuckle breeze.

Niki poked her head out from under the bed, trying for a suspicious glare that was thwarted by the way she kept blinking in the brightness. "For real? You haven't been having more of the explodey... explodey face...?"

"Not since Saturday. And it's not a big deal anyhow." Kalea leaned back, smiling up at Laka when the comfey twittered. "It was like you said, I guess. I just had to slow down for a moment. Kind of needed a wake-up call, you know?"

"Oh, good. That's good." Niki dove back under the bed. Probably not listening. Kalea kept going anyway. She almost had it now.

"I thought I was done being homesick, but I guess it was more like I was trying not to think about it? I wanted to be here now and all, but... I think remembering is good, too. I don't have to give up home while I'm at school. And I should have been spending more time with Laka. I'm sorry I was so short with you earlier," Kalea said, looking up at the comfey. Laka rotated gently, releasing a fresh, oceanic scent. All forgiven. "I think I was so worried about doing well in class and having a good time while I'm out here that I thought I had to get as far from home as possible. But it's still important to me, you know? Even the kind of crappy parts."

"The aliens? Still jealous." Niki thought aliens were cool.

"Sure, the aliens. And everything else. Something something we remember the tough times as the ones where we all come together, or whatever. I guess I needed a reminder." Auditory hallucinations were good for that, apparently. Good enough to make her reach out to Laka, something she should have been making time for already, finals or no.

"That's the spir--ah-ha!" Niki's voice was slightly muffled. A second later a shoe tumbled into the light. "How the hell did it get wedged under all that stuff?"

Niki dragged herself back out into the open, patting at her rumpled clothing and hair without much effect. "That's it! We made it! We killed our first finals! Well, I mean, you still have that one tomorrow morning, but I know you're going to--"

"We made it," Kalea said with a smile.

Niki had already shoved her foot into the pre-laced shoe and was hauling at her overstuffed suitcase. "They've got Pokkén on in the TV room. There's totally enough time for a couple rounds before my bus. Want to come?"

"No, I think I'll get that dinner," Kalea said, getting up off her bed. "Travel safe, okay? I'll see you next semester."

--​

Kalea was awake before she fully registered the noise. Her shoes were right where they were supposed to be, and she was halfway down the stairs before Auntie called for her. The house shook with intermittent explosions, the light filtering in through the windows now green-tinged, now red.

Gunther was up and pacing--one of the kids from town had been flying him while she was off at school, but he fell into their old routine easily enough. "All right, let's go shut this guy up," Kalea said, leaning close to the salamence's frilled ear, and Gunther leapt skyward with a growl.

Even with the wind whipping past her, the night was warm and heavy with the scent of flowers, the salt tang of the ocean. The bursting lights gave everything a surreal carnival air, and Kalea laughed with delight as a glowing rocket sped past just below them, Gunther snarling in irritation.

The alien was where it always was, one she'd met before or one of its kin. It faced out over the ocean, towards Ula'Ula glowing faintly across the channel. You could probably see the alien's fireworks all the way over on the big island. Maybe that was why they always found their way out here: an audience. Across the water people might be lining up, delighted or annoyed by another impromptu fireworks show.

Gunther fell into a tight circle above the alien's glowing head, and Kalea loosened the drawstring on the bag of Beast Balls. But she didn't throw, not yet. Lights burst and scattered around her. Had she seen those before, the blinking red ones that swarmed like fireflies before fading? Maybe the aliens were learning some new tricks. Or maybe she simply hadn't remembered.

Gunther grumbled pointedly. Getting him to wait for the Beast Ball was always the hard part. Left to his own devices he'd happily tear any alien to shreds, protected status or no. Kalea rattled the bag of Beast Balls but took her time about picking one out. Let the alien have its moment. It had come a very long way to hold its fireworks show. Let it have a little more time to strut its stuff, show this new world all its fanciest tricks, before it returned the same as everyone to its strange-familiar home.
 

Pen

the cat is mightier than the pen
Staff
Partners
  1. dratini
  2. dratini-pen
  3. dratini-pen2
In which I learn that you have a higher tolerance for clowns than I do . . .

This was a charming fic! 'Protagonist is nostalgic for clown-explosions' is such a Negrek-core take and I am here for it. Your descriptions are lovely, per usual, but I really felt the world get more vivid during the sections in Alola, which felt very true to the protagonist's state of mind. All the slice of life elements were extremely #relatable. Niki was nicely sketched as a good-hearted, amusing, oblivious coder room-mate--it almost goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway: it's nice to have people living their lives in the background to the protagonist's musing and makes this world feel real for our time in it.

The incidental poke stuff was also fun. Comfey scent language! I did think the mini-arc about neglecting Laka should have been elaborated on a bit more or dropped. We're told she's been in the green house for 3 weeks, but not how frequently Kalea's been visiting. And the apology bit felt very perfunctory.

Including actual 'exploding head syndrome' was an interesting twist. I ultimately wasn't sure how much it really did for the story, though. It feels kind of extra coincidental that the person with exploding head syndrome her whole life also ends up at a place where explosions literally wake her up all the time.

The characterization of the blacephelon as non-antagonistic, just really excited to do their rocket shows was a fun take and made me almost like them. I enjoyed Kalea's sympathy and how in the end she is able to appreciate the show. I felt like there was a parallel you half-sketched out but didn't follow through on fully--the blacephelon leave their home to perform and enjoy that. I wondered if Kalea could find in that a re-ignition of her own motivations for leaving home and studying in Galar. We don't get much sense of what drew her there and she's mostly resenting it in the narration we get. It's tricky, since you're already balancing her realization that she can hold onto her home even while she's away. But maybe there's a joint revelation she can get from the blacephelon about appreciating having a new world to perform in?

But yeah, this was a very cool take on the prompt. And I'll say again how much I enjoyed all the salamence-riding, explosion dodging sequences--you really captured that sense of times when the world feels hyper-real and alive.

To fully absorb that she'd left the explosions at home. All of them.
Wasn't sure what the 'all of them' was meant to imply? Usually I'd take that to mean figurative as well as literal explosions, but it seems like her home-life was pretty harmonious other than the literal explosions?

In the middle not a photo but a curling, many-colored piece of quill-work, the biggest she'd completed back in high school.
I tripped up on this sentence a bit. Maybe stick in a comma after middle?

Kalea sighed and contemplated whether it was worth it to try and get back to sleep.
Maybe, Kalea sighed and contemplated trying to get back to sleep.

Now that she was properly awake she could tell the radiator was acting up again, turning the room to desert and leaching every scrap of moisture from her mouth.
I might pick one or the other with the radiator descriptions? Desert or leaching.

Her eyes were sunk deep in bruise-colored circles, and Kalea was pretty sure the wrinkled black T-shirt she was wearing was the same one she'd had on yesterday and possibly also slept in. Still, Niki's eyes were as bright and intent as ever as she went on
The double eyes read a bit awkwardly to me.

A week away from getting on a plane and getting out of the cold and dark at last. There had been more snow last night, and the dining hall's floor was a gritty, slushy mess spotted with disintegrating napkins and dropped food. More snow, and here she was, hoping to catch a flight soon... Kalea sighed.
I was a little confused about the 'More snow, and here she was' bit because it implies that it's weird that more snow means she'd be hoping to catch a flight, but that follows naturally . . ?

Easy for her to say, Kalea thought with a pang of resentment. Niki would glance at her notes a couple of hours before her exams and then get A's no matter what.
Bit odd that Kalea's making that assessment after just describing how Niki looks sleep deprived from studying. And indeed, every time we see Niki, she's working at her coding.

Kalea made vague noises of acknowledgement, and Niki buzzed off back to the dorms. Kalea still had plenty of company; not far away was a big group of mostly-pokémon that had pushed a couple tables together and was loudly gossiping about the basketball team.
I was a bit taken aback here because this makes it sound like pokemon attend the school and can be easily understood by humans? But all the human-pokemon interactions we see seem like the more standard set-up. For a moment, with the verb buzzed, I wondered if Niki was supposed to be a pokemon, lol.

One boy a couple tables over was having a plate of sauceless, buttery spaghetti and orange Jell-o with a side of what looked like Biology notes.
Lol, rip, relatable.

But--real talk--if there's butter, is it really sauceless spaghetti?

A week. Six days. She could keep it together for six days. No more explosions.
Last sentence felt a bit unnecessary.

But Kalea's feet led her to the greenhouse instead of to her textbooks. That's where she'd find Laka, who had to be even more homesick than Kalea was, confined to the greenhouse and the adjoining biology building for the last three weeks. The comfey would wilt immediately in winter cold.
The exposition in this feels a bit clunky at times.

Laka floated over, chirping a bright greeting, overflowing with the scent of vanilla.
Since comfey communicate by smell, I wonder if the vanilla scent itself is the greeting?

Nearby a boy in an expensive-looking polo shirt smeared with mud was chasing baby bulbasaur around, in and out under tables, trying to take their temperatures.
I adore your background pokemon-human shenanigans.

The comfey was a lot easier to figure out than something like a pikachu, where you literally couldn't hear half their vocalizations. On the flip side, Laka was a lot less intense than someone like Blade, who was constantly blowing up Niki's phone with bad math jokes.
So good.

At least now she could roam the whole greenhouse, which was full of students and pokémon and growing things besides.
Why the 'besides'?

This close up, Laka's scent was overwhelming, complexly floral and always shifting, one second fruity, the next vinegarish, then on to meaty, somehow, and on and on and on. Kalea figured she was getting some kind of complicated lecture in Comfey.
Huh, I thought Kalea said she mostly understood her? This seems like pretty broad guessing.

"I thought I was over being homesick, but now I can't stop thinking--it's stupid. Who gets nostalgic about aliens?"
Sticking a pin in this after getting to the end--feels like Kalea has kind of already made her revelation here, if she gets that she's nostalgic?

Laka chirred and released a heavy wave of scent, and Kalea inhaled deeply, the way she'd been taught when Laka first joined her.
Okay, so I was all ready to flag chirred as a typo for chirped with a smart comment about having had to look it up to make sure it's not a real verb first, since it's you, but I did look it up and it turns out it is a real verb so yes, joke is on me. And you have the best verbs.

The way she'd done in the middle of the night that first time she'd woken in a panic, thinking the ceiling was about to fall on her. Laka had been there before, and she'd been there after, too, after the doctor had figured out what was going on, after the attacks slowed and then petered out. Breathing the Aromatherapy in, Kalea was five years old again, alone with her friend in the dark, fear evaporating into orchard-scented air.
Huh, so Kalea independently had this issue pre actual blacephelon explosion visits.

Laka trilled and spun in place, petals brushing feather-light across Kalea's forehead and the overpowering Aromatherapy dissipating to leave behind a faintly earthy smell of affirmation.
Think that clause is holding a tad too much.

Laka had seemed almost pleased to hear about the return of Kalea's old, annoying medical condition. Some kind of comfey thing, maybe. Laka might be happiest with a problem to treat.
On re-read, think this is Laka being pleased that Kalea's visiting her in the first place?

Kalea tried to put the matter out of her mind and hurried towards the library, where she should have headed in the first place.
Maybe 'been' over headed? It's not really that she should have headed there, whether she made it or not, but been there.

Kalea woke again with heart hammering, head blaring with eclipsing noise.
I get the intent behind 'eclipsing noise' but blaring with eclipsing noise reads a bit funky.

It had snowed. A lot. No distinction remained between path and lawn; bushes were smooth lumps barely rising above the surface of the snow, trees clotted tangles of white and twig, branches bent down in supplication.

Outside it was utterly still save for a dusty curtain of still-falling snowflakes. A lazy, spotty scattering, nothing like the wall of snow that had thrashed the courtyard earlier, thickening the air to white. Kalea stood watching for a long moment, but nothing outside changed. Everything lay frozen below the flat black clouded sky and the orange wash of lamps that marked where the path was supposed to be.
Pretty description!

"I'm coming, Aunt Luna!"
It doesn't matter at all, but is this supposed to be the player character? The name plus casually has a salemance made me wonder.

With Chase gone on his journey, Kalea was the only one light enough to fly him out to the cape. That's always where the trouble was, some kind of thinness in reality or strange weather conditions or a hidden signal that attracted aliens, whatever it was.
Tense.

The salamence was in the air before Kalea even settled herself properly, raging away in the direction of the intruder, as mad as anyone to have been woken up.
Salamence deserve their beauty sleep!!

They flew over neat rows of pineapples and beans beneath a sky filled with streaking energy rockets, shimmering bursts of light and sound. The wooloo pasture below was full of unhappy round shapes, clustered in one corner as far from the alien as they could get, bleating and complaining in their reedy, scratchy voices.
Ahh, lovely.

The air around the alien was full of angry pikipek jeering and dive-bombing the creature, and Kalea thought she saw a yungoos biting at its ankles far below.
Aw, everyone pitching in in service of a peaceful night's sleep.

It threw as many attacks into empty patches of sky, its movements fluid and unhurried, conducting its fireworks show to music no one else could hear.
The most blessed take on blacephelon.

This kind of alien always showed up at night, presumably so its fireworks shone properly. Could it tell when it was nighttime in this world, knew just when to cross over? Or did this kind of alien show up in daytime, too, and then lie low until their moment to perform? Was it the same alien always coming back, drawn to this place by some otherworldly logic, or a parade of them, one by one finding this same spot for their fireworks?
Asking the real questions!

It was annoying, being woken in the middle of the night, but at least that had a purpose now.
I was confused by this on first read, but the idea is that she used to be woken in the night by her condition, but now it's by an actual problem? Not sure 'purpose' is really the word?

It was nice not to be up in the middle of the night, trying to aim pokéballs while riding a pokémon in flight. And yet... and yet. It felt like there was some thought, some realization, hanging just out of her reach, drifting clear and icy through the air along with the last snowflakes.
As I said, it seems like she already realized she was nostalgic for this so this feels a little discontinuous.

In front of another dorm someone bundled to anonymity slogged purposely through the snow, dragging a long furrow behind them. Kalea watched for a few seconds, wondering what were they doing. But as the person made a turn and started slogging back the other way, it struck her: ah, yes. Drawing a dick.
Lmao.

Niki would be going home first, with no finals at all on Thursday. But only if she could find her other shoe.
Lovely section opener.

Kalea rattled the bag of Beast Balls but took her time about picking one out. Let the alien have its moment. It had come a very long way to hold its fireworks show.
I really enjoyed this moment.
 

Umbramatic

The Ghost Lord
Location
The Yangverse
Pronouns
Any
Partners
  1. reshiram
I'M HERE FOR BLITZ and also Blacephalon! Yay, Blacephalon!

So we start with our protagonist, who has the most explosive case of tittintus I've ever seen, It wakes her up in the middle of the night bur it turns out to be all in her head and she's just in her dorm room.

The next morning her friend (who I am not sure is a human or Pokemon given the school this is taking place in seems to have students of both) seems to be very concerned about her "exploding head syndrome" but she brushes it off. She later talks to her Comfey friend who mostly communicates by scent (neat detail! and makes better headway even if she weirds out everyone else in the room.

Later she for whatever reason goes out into the snow (where is this school and why is it so fucking cold) and reminisces of ALOLA! Of ADVENTURE! Of CLOWN ALIENS WITH EXPLODING HEADS! She's clearly homesick man.

(And also a guy draws a dick in the snow. And that's hilarious.)

Eventually, however, she undergoes a grand quest to find her other shoe that has dropped but does not match a metaphorical shoe drop in the narrative which THREW ME OFF. And when she succeeds, she goes home. To riding Salamences (nudge nuge wink wink). To fighting Blacephalons. Life is good.

This was very intressting! KInd of unconventional... theming I would say for a fic? IT almost gives me a magical realism vibe, which is a genre I'm not normally into (I place it into the ur-genre of "fantasy for people wnho like to smell their own farts) but here it works? Excellent fic. Review over, bring in the exploding clowns.
 

Namohysip

Dragon Enthusiast
Staff
Partners
  1. flygon
  2. charizard
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. sceptile
  6. marowak
  7. jirachi
This is an interesting start, opening with an explosion that was only in their head, so to speak. But at the same time there's talk about it being normal and just some kind of thing that someone has. Maybe it's because of all the other stories I've read that deal in mental health lately, but I thought it was some manifestation of PTSD from someone who spent a lot of time hunting Ultra Beasts, if only because of the prompt in the explanation for this story.

The way you depict Pokemon communication is always interesting. This time with the very strange way that a Comfey would communicate with scent alone. I wonder if that means they would be blind to their own scent, but somehow not blind to the scent of others of their kind, if they wanted to properly interpret what they were saying without interference?

This was a really fun and docile interpretation of the explosive alien blasphalon. I like the orange sort of morality it had where it seemed to just want to entertain the Pokemon or maybe it just wanted to dance and play, and didn't seem to realize fully that its attacks were a disturbance, while still being careful enough not to strike the Pokemon in question. It's sort of an interesting contrast, sort of gives the impression of a child saying something would be fun, and they'll be careful, while not realizing the act of what they were doing was the real trouble.

And the resolution, sort of the answer to the alien's strange tendencies, was a good way to wrap up this state-of-affairs that the aliens had with the Pokemon world. I really appreciate the slight mundane way such a sort-of disaster was treated, where something so volatile as explosions would be given a nearly symbiotic system between the humans and aliens where both could sort of get what they wanted out of it. I like the undertone the story gave in that way.

Overall, another very lovely story. Thanks for the read!
 

Ambyssin

Gotta go back. Back to the past.
Location
Residency hell
Pronouns
he/him
Partners
  1. silvally-dragon
  2. necrozma-ultra
  3. milotic
  4. zoroark-soda
  5. dreepy
  6. mewtwo-ambyssin
Kalea woke to an explosion
As one does in the world of pokeymanz.
Aunt Luna, Chase, and Gunther, of course
In a vacuum, this is a very... non Alolan set of names for an Alolan lady. And her grouchy salamence.
Her eyes were sunk deep in bruise-colored circles
Are we sure Niki didn't have a case of driver vs. steering wheel racoon eyes?
and Blade's still rejecting my mod
Ah, yes, everyone's favorite batshit crazy Voice thingy retired to parsing code.
Who gets nostalgic about aliens?
May I introduce you to the furry fandom?
Niki kept her headphones up loud
Fs out for Niki's hearing.
Kalea thought that's what you did with snow, based on movies
I guess Kalea never went to Mt. Lanakila? Ever?

I am here for catnip but I don't think I have much to offer that hasn't been said already? Exploding head syndrome has several theorized etiologies, with PTSD being one of them, although I'd hesitate to say that's what Kalea is experiencing both because of the lack of any other of the far more common PTSD features and because the fic itself seems to suggest it's anxiety with a possible secondary component of strange homesickness than anything. At least, my take is that, for as strange and disturbing as Blacephalon Mind Blowing in the middle of the night might be, Kalea stopping to watch it at the end there seems to suggest a tepid acceptance and familiar comfort with the strange routine. I also find the flashback that shows her stopping a blacephalon's show kind of funny because you have the juxtaposition of this very actiony prose with Gunther doing these nifty aerial maneuvers... and Blacephalon is just vibing, blissfully unaware its explosions are feared by humans and pokémon.

Do agree that Comfey communicating with scents is a nifty idea. In fact, human olfactory nerves have a direct connection to the brain (no need to pass through processing centers), so smells can often evoke strong memory and emotional responses. It's a clever touch, even if it is short and is also under the backdrop of providing Aromatherapy to ease Kalea's anxiety.

I'm not entirely sure why it's the snow of all things that makes Kalea think back to home. Maybe because of how opposiite it is climate-wise to Alola (ignoring Mt. Lanakila)? No idea what region her university is in, but if it's got a cold, snowy winter like this my bet's on Unova. Maybe Sinnoh. But who knows?

Overall nifty little fic, but gotta give it 3/10 due to not enough Blacephalon Michael Jacksoning it up like in the anime.
1c8.gif
 

kintsugi

golden scars | pfp by sun
Location
the warmth of summer in the songs you write
Pronouns
she/her
Partners
  1. silvally-grass
  2. lapras
  3. golurk
  4. booper-kintsugi
  5. meloetta-kint-muse
  6. meloetta-kint-dancer
  7. murkrow
  8. yveltal
I’m three thousand years late to reviewing this, but in my defense your honor I’m really stupid and thought I already did.

This one was delightfully fun on reread too, and I think the same framework elements really stuck out in my mind–Laka and the comfey worldbuilding (speciesbuilding? idk), the slice-of-life elements of the university setting, the way you described the quiet clarity that comes with snowfall. I also think the resolution is pretty fun, and does feel distinctly you–the kids are all right and practically normal by Negrek fic standards, but they do still yearn for the mines days of hunting aliens on dragonback.

The college-vibes were for me the backbone of this story, as they serve as the set-dressing but also the core conflict of Kalea's homesickness/head exploding. I like how you portray Kalea as a little distant from them, able to understand what’s happening but kind of remote–she doesn't know the actor's in Niki’s posters, she watches the plain spaghetti with butter and jello feast almost clinically, and she’s very “ooh what's this person doing trudging so diligently in the snow” before realizing they are making the classic and only kind of collegiate art that can be made. Niki as a very supportive but also not-a-licensed-therapist-she’s-got-exams roommate is a nice secondary character to bounce some of the exposition and dialogue off of. I think you portrayed their relationship as “close but not that close” really well; it feels like a healthy freshman year roommate relationship. Chicken nugget night! Dinner of champs ig. It’s all very, idk, cozy’s not the word, but it sets a very specific cast of characters and the frame of mind they’re in, which I thought worked well with the rest of a story about unplaced night stresses. The rest of the world turns on, sorta thing.

I loved the little P2 helper duck and how pokemon get to come to college as well. Don’t tell Sari. I wasn’t sure the extent to which they’re actually taking classes vs just hanging out–Laka’s mostly there to keep Kalea company and I don’t think she’s got any coursework, for example, while I think Blade (is this a reference? this feels like a reference) is the second half of Niki’s cooperative programming group. Also not sure how she was able to figure out what the group of mostly pokemon was talking about in the cafeteria, but I’m glad they’re hyped about the basketball team. I don’t think these are important details to understanding the story and was largely just curious lol; love to see worlds where pokemon get to do things.

I’m probably missing some of the subtleties of the ending–I liked the parallel ties of feeling out of place when leaving your small town for the first time with, being a literal actual confused alien. College really did feel like an alternate reality only reachable by wormhole sometimes. And I think Kalea ends up getting some closure by the end; I’m just not sure where it came from. I think there’s a thread here with “how long had it been since she'd even thought about aliens?” about getting so immersed in where you are that you forget where you’ve been, maybe something about how she’s been so focused on surviving in college that she hasn’t had time to think about life back home–except she’s got her family collage that she looks at whenever she has nightmares, she goes to Laka to calm down, etc. So maybe there’s a specific nuance in missing the comforts of home as well as the crazy bits? If so, I think the dichotomy would be better conveyed if the family had some crazy bits/things that don’t belong as well that she’s been ignoring [to fit in, because she forgot, because she’s so far away], idk–a shared holiday that doesn’t get celebrated at uni, her professors don’t pronounce “Kalea” well so she goes by something different and then realizes this is also stressful, etc. That blacephelon is having a fun time in the final capture seemed also part of the catharsis, but I didn’t follow the extent of the parallelism–“let it have a little more time to strut its stuff [...] before it returned the same as everyone to its strange-familiar home”, if also true for Kalea, makes it seem like there’s no middle ground, everyone has to go back to where they belong, so she has to return unchanged back to the farm (even though the fact that she’s hesitating in throwing the Beast Ball in this moment is a sign that she’s different).

Still, gosh, what a good take on such a shitpost prompt. I don’t think I quite followed the closer details of the ending but I really liked its broad strokes–feeling alien looking at the aliens is a really nice direction to take the Ultra Beasts; feels quite natural for how utterly unhinged these guys are. The little understated character and worldbuilding details are always such a treat as well. Thank you for writing this!
 
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