Null Forest Depths

[Namohysip]

No matter how far one traveled, it seemed that the forest all looked the same, like it was some kind of endless Dungeon. Perhaps it was not, but its sheer size, and the fact that the team was advised not to stray too far from the village, meant that the forest was effectively their endless barrier to exploring more of the place. Not that they would want to. The trees all lacked leaves and the wood was a deep, dark color. Cutting into them revealed pink or purple insides that tasted like the river water, but was at least filling.

Strange creatures lived in this forest, too. There was always a strange sense of being watched and stalked, especially while alone. Beady eyes often stared at travelers from the shadows. What strange denizens lived in this hellish landscape...?

<><><>​

 

[Adamhuarts]

Cynthian heaved and panted, but she kept running even as her chest burned with pain. She leaned against one of the identical lifeless trees to catch her breath. Everywhere she turned looked exactly the same.

"I only know how to run... Whenever I get scared..."

That dreadful shadow was still following her. Cynthian turned around with gritted teeth and a weeping face. No matter how far she ran, her shadow was always behind her. Never getting closer, but never too far for her words not to reach Cynthian.

"Leave me alone!"

Cynthian whimpered and she was back on her feet again. Running with her flowers glasped over the base of her horns.

"Icetales will forget about me, so will Ivy. No one will care if I'm gone."

Even with her flowers held tight to her head, her shadow's words seemed to be broadcasting right into Cynthian's head...

"Get away from me!"

"I couldn't save anyone. The one thing I'm good at is running away and letting others down."

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Please, I beg you."

"I'm weak, helples, and pathetic. I only know how to be carried along. I don't know how to stand on my own."

"Stop it... Please."

Cynthian tripped on an outstretched root and fell face first into the dirt. She pushed herself up with a whimper and a groan. When Cynthian looked up, her shadow was standing right in front of her.

"I must tell Mama Zahra that Mama Rosa is gone because of me. Will she hate me? Will I even be able to tell her? She'll hate me!"

Cynthian crawled back, staring at the distorted Roserade with shaking eyes.

"I deserve to be hated. I brought Mama Zahra so much trouble trying to raise me, I caused her so many sleepless nights because Mama Rosa was gone. I deserve to be alone, and die alone."

"Stop this already. You don't know anything!" Cynthian yelled.

The shadow tilted her head slightly, her featureless eyes locked on Cynthian. For the first time, it felt like she was actually looking at Cynthian herself.

"I know, because I am YOU!"

"No, you're not me! Stop pretending to be me!"

The shadow scowled and the smoke seeping from her chest rushed out in a much denser plume. The smoke gathered in her black rose to form a sharp spike. She drew it backwards, ready to strike.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Brisa had been right—Cynthian's shadows were vicious, after the sorry fucker had spent gods knew how long torturing herself. The shadow was pursuing her, spewing recriminations and anguish.

She must be so weak. You oughta have protected her more, and sooner. Help her. Now.

Brisa tackled the shadow with a desperate lunge, knocking it to the ground, where she laid into it with teeth, with claws, with hammer blows. It beat its thorns and shadow-spikes against Brisa, but she was insensate to the attack, and it resorted to cowering, trembling beneath her. Brisa, just kept tearing away.

This won't help. You think the fuckin' plant will believe she has worth if you do this feral shit? No. Get a hold of yerself.

Brisa growled, and pressed the shadow's face into the ground with one paw. It whimpered piteously.

"Cynthian. Come back with me to the village. This ain't the time to get lost."

 

[Adamhuarts]

"Brisa?" Cynthian called out meekly. She looked at her shadow being pinned down and helpless, then her eyes drifted to Brisa. Rather than relief, Cynthian instead felt—

"I was right. I only know how to be saved, and then left behind once they know I'm only good at dragging others down." She chuckled self derisively.

"No, don't listen to what she's saying!"

"I told Maple we'd bring Joule back, I swore Soda there will be no sacrifices, I promised Icetales we'll get stronger together, but I died uselessly and left him behind." The shadow whimpered, then dissolved into smoke and reappeared a few feet away with eyes burning with hatred, but that hatred didn't seem to be directed at Brisa.

"I hate myself for being so weak. I've tried, I've really tried. I'm not good enough. Mama Rosa would have been be so disappointed. I am the mistake she wasted her life to save..."

Cynthian curled herself up and held her flowers to her head. She just wanted it to stop. What was the point of it anymore? Now, Brisa knew, and Cynthian wanted everything to just end.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Brisa swiped at the shadow, snarling as she tried to pin it down.

Give up this stupid bullshit. It's a fucking manifestation of dark thoughts. Of course you can't just fucking fight it. Reason with her.

"Cynthian, listen t'me," she growled. "I get it, you're strivin' t'make yerself useful and y'feel like you're fallin' short. So what? Y'think I don't know what that's like? I left behind friends th'same as you, friends I made promises to."

She stared at Cynthian's shocked face with grim resolve.

"Y'gotta get the fuck past this. You still gotta do what needs t'be done. No matter how y'feel, you jus' have to keep makin' the best choices y'can. Get a grip, and do the best you can. You don't got the moral right to do nothin', jus' 'cause you can't do everythin'."

The shadows were the most aggressive they'd been since the first time, and she was so, so tired.

"Come back with me, Cynthian," she asked, hoping it would be the last time.

 

[Adamhuarts]

"I can't do any of those things, Brisa! I'm not like Mama Rosa. If only she got sent to you guys instead of me, then everything would have been okay. I'm just a fake, a cheap imitation, a coward" the shadow said with smoky tears flowing down her cheeks.

"I'm scared, Brisa. I'm scared I'll never live up to her. I... I don't even know what that means anymore. She was gone when I was only five... I'm just chasing a shadow that isn't there anymore,"

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Damn right one of them would've done a better job. So fuckin' what? You do the best job you can. Otherwise you're just givin' up!

Brisa hadn't felt it for a while, not since the earliest days on Cibus, but that notion of it should have been them had a bitter familiarity to it. But she'd grown so much stronger and made so many connections on Cibus, and done things Jesse and Sierra never would, and maybe never could, have done.

"Well she didn't get sent," she said, firmly. "We got you, and despite yer downright nonsensical assessment of yer contributions, it's you that's meant to be here. I never met yer ma, but I'm sure she was real special, and I know how fuckin' tough it is to have someone incredible to live up to. But yer memories of her ain't a standard you oughta measure yerself by, and you're more fuckin' real than a goddamn memory."

Brisa approached the ashen roserade, slowly this time, no claws. She raised a paw and extended it for the shadow to hold.

"We don't need ya t'be yer ma. We need ya t'be you, at yer best, whether you live up to her or not. So quit the bullshit, Cynthian. Come back with me."

 

[Adamhuarts]

"What if I fail again? What if I break down and become helpless again?! Is it really okay? To just be me?" Cynthian and her shadow said in unison. The strong mint and lemon scents of her flowers almost suffocated the air around them.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

She should get ahold of herself. This is worse than you in the Pit. You have more hope and more allies here, you should be FINE.

At least in Rockfall Cave, she and Starr hadn't had shadows to deal with like this. Brisa kept her paw extended and held her gaze.

"There's always the chance y'might fail, Cynthian. Courage wouldn't fuckin' matter otherwise, now, would it? But even if you do fail, you have yer allies t'pick you back up. That's what makes the team strong, goddamnit! Partnership. So thunder help me, Cynthian, if'n ya want t'see yer livin' friends again, take my goddamn paw and come back with me."

 

[Adamhuarts]

Without warning, Cynthian's shadow lunged for Brisa and held her in a tight embrace while she cried.

"I want to be with my friends and everyone again! I want to see Icetales again. I want to make more dolls with Leg. I want to fight to protect them!" The shadow's body began to fade like the smoldering flames of a candle. "Thank you, Brisa, for being my friend too..."

A moment later, she was gone. What remained of her drifted towards Cynthian, and she became whole again.

Cynthian stood up and stared awkwardly. She wasn't sure what to even say while she wiped her dampened face.

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Brisa clenched her jaw and kept resolute as the shadow held her tight. Even the thorns pressing into her didn't deter her from returning the embrace. When it was over, she looked to Cynthian and her own composure. The little plant was carrying herself differently.

"C'mon," growled Brisa, softly. "Walk with me, back to the village. You'll be alright now."

---

"What about you? Excited to go on a world saving quest?"

"Not excited. Resigned, maybe. Just solvin' problems in my head and hopin' I find a way to exist alongside... all this. For however long we're here. I have the feelin' it's gonna be longer than they think."

---

"You were my first friend on this planet," mused Brisa, smiling drily. "D'you remember?"

 

[Adamhuarts]

"You were my first friend on this planet," mused Brisa, smiling drily. "D'you remember?"

Cynthian's flowers a strong tangy fragrance upon hearing that, and she smiled warmly as her eyes glistened.

"Yes, I shouldn't forget that," she said, following Brisa in tow.

<><><><>

 

[windskull]

Nip had no clue how long it took him to get to the forest, but it was far longer than he would like. He was starting to tire from the mad dash from the river. Constantly, he glanced over his shoulder, keeping an eye out for the possibly pursuing charizard. If he didn't find Brisa soon, he feared his exhaustion would slow him down enough to be caught.

Fortunately, inn the distance, standing amongst the trees, he caught sight of the luxio. Cynthian was there as well. For a second, he considered taking a different route, worried about leading a rampaging Owen right to the small grass-type. But he couldn't prolong the chase any longer.

He stumbled to a halt in front of them, gasping in air. His words came out between gasps in a jumbled mess. "Brisa! You gotta... Owen... evolved... losing his senses... Need to... stop him! Calm him!"

 

[unrepentantAuthor]

Owen.

Her friend's relationship with his Shadow had always seemed one of the most stable and healthy of the team, but didn't that mean the distance to fall if it ever shattered was so much further? Owen was a sweetheart, sure, but his confession to her on the eve of moving to Destiny Village... He'd done terrible things.

He needed her.

"Nip, get Cynthian and yerself back to the village. Now. I'll handle Owen."

"Wait! I want to help Owen too!" Cynthian took a hard step forward and wobbled dizzily.

"Yer in no condition fer a fight. He'd fry you. Go."

Brisa took off faster than Cynthian could give chase. She ran off the way Nip had come, tracking his scent backward. As she ran, she heard the roaring of a crazed charizard.

Was she going to have to fight her friend?

 

[windskull]

Nip took a moment to catch his breath as Brisa ran off. He considered following her, but the idea of leaving Cynthian alone worried him. Sure, Cynthian could take care of herself. But against a charizard? He didn't like those odds.

As his breathing returned to normal, he slumped to the ground. His shadow quietly padded up to stand beside him, looking over Cynthian with an uneasy, but mostly disinterested gaze. For one reason or another, it seemed less frightened of her than it did the others.

 

[Adamhuarts]

Cynthian's heart persisted on following Brisa, but she tripped over and fell on her face. With the adrenaline rush of the last few minutes gone, exhaustion weighed on her like a pile of rocks.

She got up to her knees with a groan. It pained her not being able to help Owen out... but she believed in Brisa.

"That's right, I believe in my friends." Cynthian smiled, and a scent of freshly baked bread radiated around her. She glanced back at Nip and tilted her head curiously.

"I guess it's just you and me now. How are you doing... with your shadows I mean. I... almost got killed by mine a couple minutes ago."

 

[windskull]

Nip flicked an ear as he drew in the pleasant scent. He nodded to the shadow in question, who still stood at attention, though now facing outwards instead of facing Cynthian. "Well, it won't quit following me around, but it sounds like I'm... Doing better than most?" He and his shadow we're not trying to kill each other, at least.

"He refused to listen to reason," his shadow said, glancing back for a moment. "He keeps insisting jumping into danger for Pokemon that would turn on him in an instant if they knew the real him."

Nip's lip curled back, and he let out a warning snarl towards his shadow. Then he took a deep breath, and turned his attention back to Cynthian. "Well... Subjectively better."

 

[Adamhuarts]

Cynthian raised an eyebrow at Nip's shadow. In truth she didn't know much about Nip as their interactions in the past hadn't been plentiful.

"I think it's very reasonable to fight for your friends," she said to the shadow sneasel.

"I'm glad to see you're doing well though, Nip. The void lands isn't the most calming of places to be." Cynthian tried to stand up, but struggled to find her balance while she did. She managed to hold herself up eventually though.

"I've actually been here before... It looks different than I remember. Less malicious. I wonder why."

 

[windskull]

"Are they really friends if they try to kill you, or even hurt you?"

Nip grumbled and swatted at his shadow, which deftly sidesteped. "Ignore it. I've found that listening doesn't help anything." He turned his attention fully back to Cynthian, tilting his head. "Now, what was that you were saying? You've been here - or somewhere like here - before?"

 

[Adamhuarts]

"Yeah, I was. A dark matter almost destroyed my world too years ago. The whole world got sucked into the void lands briefly..." Cynthian shut her eyes and exhaled a deep sigh.

"It still feels like a nightmare, though coming back here makes the experience feel a lot more real." Cynthian straightened up her posture and looked ahead. "Knowing all that, I don't even know how I'm calm right now..."

She glanced at her flower and shook off some dirt that'd collected in it. "Maybe accepting my shadow helped with that?"