Pokémon New Smells (one-shot)

[surskitty]

I've been working on an N fic for a while, but it's slow going, so here is an experimental set of a drabble and a half, a drabble, and a half-drabble, for a word-count of 300. Please be gentle.


1 - Zorua

Now that he knows how to hide, all he does is practice and it's really boring. As a fox, he's more important than anyone, but his mother always ditches him with the stupid dogs and the dogs have their mothers right there. They have mothers so much, their mothers feed him every time he whines like they don't even notice he's not a dog.

He's not a dog! He's a fox. He deserves someone who'll keep him company all the time and he doesn't want to wait to lose his tail like mama.

But then his mother brings him a bald monkey and his fur stands straight on end when he realises it's still alive. It's not meat at all!

"This," she says proudly, "is a baby human. You're going to teach it to talk."

Mama, no!

(It turns out monkey paws are good at grooming. He forgives her, eventually.)

---

2 - woobat

The shape-thieves stole a human. The story travels with the wind, carried by the cotton lambs, and her fellow sticky-noses like to exaggerate. It's as big as a mountain-eater and twice as deadly, or helpless and nearly prey.

They didn't say it was cute.

"Brother, no," it says, aura blazingly loud, and she listens in fascination as the thief-kit settles down, peaceful. A cotton lamb wiggles closer to the human, and it brushes the lamb's fuzz and lets it go free.

"Me next!" she calls, and she puts her life in its claws.

(It only hurts her when it leaves.)

---

3 - Darmanitan

Once upon a time, her clan lived in the forest.

Once upon a time, there was one dragon, not three.

Meditation is useless if you can't follow it with action.

A human who listens is an opportunity.

Not every opportunity comes twice.

(He wakes them up, and they go home.)

 

[zion of arcadia]

Please be gentle.

Don't worry, I'll go slow. :')

Even though this is short, I'm impressed by how alien yet unique the voices of the three pokemon feel while still clearly communicating their opinions on N. A lot is said in a very sparse amount of words. They all have their own internal rhythm and slang that defines the way they think.

The only one that shows some mild inconsistencies is perhaps Zoroark. The sentences in his section start out as meandering run-ons and then the back-half turn short and abrupt.

It's interesting that you draw a comparison between foxes and dogs, here. I wonder if this is meant to also draw a parallel between N and other humans: similar but not quite the same (special? better? the zoroark implies a sense of superiority). The relationship Zoroark has with his mother also seems to mimic, in its own way, the relationship N has with his father, Ghetsis. Both are often abandoned by their primary parental figure with an adopted family picking up the slack. And perhaps one day N will forgive Ghetsis, too.

The woobat section was the one I struggled the most with parsing out. Interesting that it's not capitalized compared to the others. From what I can guess, this is a reference to N always releasing the mons he catches in an area? I'm not sure I've seen someone draw an abandonment parallel between N leaving behind pokemon he befriends before, as it's often written more as a means of showing respect toward the pokemon's autonomy. Can you really be friends with someone if you refuse to stay with them for an extended period of time? I actually really like that idea. It's refreshing.

While I loved how ponderous and reflective the Darmanitan section felt, it did seem thematically very different from the other drabbles. Both woobat and Zoroark seem more about family dynamics and abandonment. Darmanitan's section focuses more on reparations and clearly examining the relationship between humans and pokemon on a broader level. Also hints at environmentalism, with the reference to the forest (and the more meta realization that zen darmanitan are found in a desert). An example of this is the way these two lines parallel each other:

Mama, no!

"Brother, no," it says

While don't see anything of the sort in the final drabble. Strikes me as mildly incongruous to the rest of the pattern.

(He wakes them up, and they go home.)

Wonderful final line. A poem about home:

Like me you'll long for home, where birds' glad song
Means flowering lanes and leas and spaces dry,
And tender thoughts and feelings fine and strong,
Beneath a vivid silver-flecked blue sky.

--"To One Coming North" (third stanza) by Claude McKay

 

[Persephone]

As a fox, he's more important than anyone

It is very good that the zorua understands this. Dogs are not as good as foxes. Fox mothers are best mothers, but they have Important Fox Things to do and also sometimes let most of their kids die. Pixie's only objection is that snow foxes are best and deserve even more stuff.

(It turns out monkey paws are good at grooming. He forgives her, eventually.

Scritches are the true use of the hoomans. And milk. And cleaning up after you. And air conditioning. Humans have nicer stuff than they deserve and you're happy to liberate it from them and give it to foxes. This nice stuff includes N. Humans don't deserve N.

I'm kind of surprised that baby N is a gentle bat floofer. Babies tend not to be very gentle with anyone. Are more narcissistic than foxes but don't actually have the right to be. Baby hooman being a strange novelty is hilarious tho. Ah, yes, today's pleasant distraction is this tiny hairless monkey we have taken from its habitat and care for now in a gilded cage. The humans say that's unfair as if they don't train pokemon like that. Or have zoos.

Teachmanitan is also good. Must meditate and do wise Jedi instructions. Mold this child of man into a true pokemon. Maybe play some Phil Collins music over a montage. Trust me, it won't be entirely forgotten in twenty years. The ending is the darmanitan going back to human society with N, right? I also don't entirely get what the split dragon reference is supposed to further here.

 

[Flaze]

So, I'm not very good when it comes to reviewing, analyzing or reading short stories like this, they're kind of like poetry in the case that they rely on carrying power with as few words as possible. That being said, I think it was really cute still in the way you showed three different points of view with only a few sentences, immediately telling us what each of the pokemon think of N's presence there and their relationship with him.

It's also an interesting way to expand on what little we know about N's backstory, it's not like we get a proper account of it, but it's still a nice nod and helps show us how being surrounded by pokemon as a kid influenced him later on in life as well as his ideals.

Of the three viewpoints I liked the zorua's the most. He clearly has a high opinion on his species and his abilities and I love how you convey his relationship with N so succinctly, both what he thought of him when he arrived and what he thought of him after meeting him. It's also cute how his favorite aspect is the fact that it feels nice when N pets him.

Out of the other two viewpoints the one that jumped at me was Darmanitan's. It sounds a little ominous in the way it's phrased and it kind of feels like it might've been the one who educated N and told him about the different ways in which pokemon live and how humans might've hurt them. It does make sense that it would see someone like N as a chance to have a human that properly understands pokemon and maybe it's the reason why N was able to communicate with them alter on as well.

And well, I'm sorry if this review is nothing super complex or anything but I still really liked it, even if it was short, it packed its own share of information as well.

 

[windskull]

Hi! I was looking for oneshots to review for the blitz and thought this one looked worth checking out. You do a good job of conveying information in very few words. And I feel like each part has its own unique voice.

I love the way you handle Zorua’s thought process. It feels a bit human, but a bit not at the same time. Some of the zorua’s comments feel like that of a jealous child. But at the same times, there are things like his comments about the dogs. And then there’s the implied importance of certain very pokemon-esque things like losing his tail.

In a similar vein, I like the little touches in the woobat section that give it an nonhuman feel. Such as when they call other woobats “sticky-noses” or call the zoruas “shape thieves.” And I think it’s cute that they see N up close with the others and just. Want in on that.

I do think the weakest of the trio is 3, and I think part of that comes from the limited word count, and trying to squeeze as much information into as few words as possible. And as a result the ideas in it end up feeling a bit disjoint and I have a bit of trouble following the character’s drive.

Despite that I do like what I read. There’s a nice, unifying thread of how each of these pokemon met N, and their reasons for choosing to join him. One because of his mother, one because they see how he treats the others, and one that sees him as an opportunity, in part due to his willingness to listen. It was a fun little read.