Mystery Continent ~ Northern Pines

[Flyg0n]

Koa stared back, slightly unnerved. Why did he care? Did he just wanted information? He'd thought that at first but now, seeing them, he felt... something else.

Pity? Sadness? Some sort of empathy maybe... It had to hurt, to be lost and confused, to have done something that you felt terrible for, regretted so much.

"I'm... sorry. For what happened." His stomach twisted a little. Xernatus had been manipulated. Just like them, just like everyone just like-

You?

How much worse would it feel for Xernatus? "You were corrupted, right?"

 

[Namohysip]

"Corrupted... I didn't even know I wasn't the person I was!" Xernatus flicked what used to be its lower body, now some kind of tail, in the snow. "I'm... Xerneas... but I know I'm not. I killed him. I killed him and stole his body and... now everyone just sees me as a parasite. They wanted to kill me. I'm... I'll never be welcome here. I'm not Xerneas and I never was... So go away! Just... let me fade away..."

 

[Flyg0n]

Koa drew back, almost surprised at their fury. Yet their words felt like some were twisting his throat. He swallowed stiffly and sat down. "I'm not going anywhere," he said firmly. It's what he would have wanted someone to do for him. "You're not just a parasite... even if you did do something awful.... did you want to do that?" he shook his head. "But whether or not you meant to or wanted to... you proved at the Tree that you could still choose. You can be whatever you want."

 

[Namohysip]

"Oh, I can choose. Fine. Then what happens if I choose to me Xerneas? Do you think anyone would agree? Do you think anyone would even... think of it at all?!" The tree trunk creaked against the pressure. "I'm... I'm never going to be what I wanted. What I was born thinking I was. It's all a lie... my whole existence is a lie... Everything in my head is... wrong. There's another Xerneas out there... I'll... even if I found a way to kill him... to take him away... they'll never accept me."

 

[Flyg0n]

Koa fidgeted. He had never felt so out of his depth before. So scared. He wanted to help so bad but he didn't want to make things any worse-

"Do you want to be Xerneas?" he asked softly. He paused and stared at the ground. "I mean... I don't know a lot about you or what you are. Do you know how exactly you came to be? Are you like... Xerneas's familiar or whatever?"

Was that anger talking, or did Xernatus really want to find and kill their... other half? counterpart? Parent?

 

[Namohysip]

"Being Xerneas is all I know." Xernatus shivered. "I... I thought I was him. I thought I was him all this time, and then I... one day I find out I'm not. I'm just someone who... replaced him. How would you feel if you... woke up one day and found out you weren't... whatever your name is?" Xernatus pressed its head against the trunk. "What if that's really what you are? What if Diyem didn't summon you from your world? What if you were just... replicas of that person's memories? And in reality... you're nothing but Void Shadows? That's... me. That's what happened to me..."

 

[Flyg0n]

The chill in the air seemed to grow and grow as Xernatus spoke, until Koa felt cold to his very bones. He stared down at his paws for a long moment, his thoughts swirling like the wisps of snow around him. "That... that freakin sucks," he muttered finally. He wasn't sure what else to say, and it felt like the words came nowhere near doing his thoughts any justice, but he couldn't think of anything else worse.


So Xernatus was just... Void Shadows? "But... you must be more than that. What happened back at the tree? Do you know what... what made you snap out of it I guess? I mean you helped us back there. You chose that."

He gave a feeble sigh. "I don't know what that would feel like and I don't know what anyone else feels but... You're still someone."

 

[Namohysip]

"I don't know," Xerneas said. "I felt... like I was supposed to help. That's... all I wanted. I had to protect the Tree. And I had to protect Diyem. And then... something changed, and I listened to what Diyem said, and that's it." Xernatus prodded the ground with what used to be its hoof. "...How can I be someone if everything I thought I was... isn't? If they ever find the real Xerneas... where will I go...?"

 

[Flyg0n]

"You... you don't have to leave," Koa said slowly. "I mean. Maybe we can find something for you. Something you want to do. Not just Xerneas but something you like." He paused. "Just because you're not Xerneas doesn't mean you're not real."

Was it even that simple? Would the citizens of Cibus ever trust this being? But if they could learn to accept Dark Matter, maybe they could accept Xernatus. The ache in his chest grew. Xernatus had to be able to change. To choose. If who it had started as was all it could be...

What does that make you?

"Do you remember how you ended up as Xerneas? Did someone send you or ask you to do it? Maybe if we knew who did this... maybe we could stop them."

 

[Namohysip]

"I don't know..." Xernatus looked away. "I don't know anything... Just that I thought I was Xerneas. Th-that's all I know... that's all I..." He laughed a little. "I... I thought I'd lived for ages and ages, whole eras... and yet I'm only a few months old. Look at me now... You're older than I am..."

He curled up again. "Go away... I'm fine right here."

 

[Flyg0n]

Koa frowned, a look of determination on his face. "I don't care. I'm not going anywhere." He stared right at Xerneas, as if willing them to feel his stubborness. "Whatever you did... that doesn't matter. You don't have to be whatever you think you were made to be. You can choose your legacy."

You have to.

"Maybe you don't remember anything. That's fine. But you wanted something back then at the tree, and I know you must want something now. Anything!" He felt like he was rambling, but he didn't care. "Even... even if its just a burger. Or maybe a fight or a book or..." he growled under his breath in frustration, grasping for the words he wanted, desperately wanting them to see.

"What do you want to do, right now?"

 

[Namohysip]

"I... I..." Xerneas squeezed the tree trunk again. It looked like it was in danger of snapping. "I want to know why you care at all. Why any of you care. Why you keep... pestering me when I'm not even who you really want. What's the point? Blind faith?!" The wood creaked dangerously.

 

[Flyg0n]

"Because you matter!" Koa countered, his voice rising to a near desperate shout. "Because no one deserves to believe that where they come from is all they can be!"

He sucked in a sharp breath.

"So what if you're not Xerneas? I don't care! Maybe other people do but I don't! You're Xernatus! You're something that I've never even seen before! Someone who can be anything at all! You saved people at the Tree. You deserve to be able to choose. If you did it once, you can do it again."

He stopped and stared, realizing he'd gotten carried away. "It's not blind faith," he murmured. "It's just faith."

 

[Namohysip]

"Oh, what's the difference?!" Xernatus shouted. "I used to think I was a god. How can a god have faith?! I have nothing. And I never will!" The wood creaked and cracked, and then, without warning, it collapsed entirely. The wood splintered and snapped as red energy coursed through it, and it abruptly tipped over and toward Koa. The ground trembled, knocking Koa off his feet.

"No--!" Xernatus moved. Time seemed to slow. His head glowed with more red energy and he fired a beam upward.

Koa stood in the middle of a molten hole in the tree. All around him, Eterna energy crackled weakly, charred splinters falling over him. It was several feet wide... but he was unharmed.

The tree heaved upward anyway, a panicked, serpentine deer hefting the whole log up. His antlers glowed brightly and the whole log shuddered. Groaning, he hefted the log away, where it fell heavily--snow that had collected on pine trees all over fell in a great avalanche, sprinkling Xernatus with frost.

"I..." Xernatus trembled. "I'm... sorry."

 

[Flyg0n]

One moment, he was fine, and the next everything felt like it exploded. The tree shattered at the trunk, tipping towards him. The ground seemed to tilt under his feet and before he could move, he found himself on his side, the tree about to fall, about to crush him -

Red light filled his vision for a moment, energy crackling eveywhere. Next thing he knew, the tree lay around him, half in splinters, the molten edges of the hole still glowing weakly. He could feel his heart hammering in his ears and he trembled slightly as Xernatus heaved the tree aside. Yet beneath his shock, he felt grateful.

How strange... A falling tree had frightened him more than facing down actual gods. Blinking the random thought away, he stared up at Xernatus. Then he laughed a little, a chuckle of relief mixed with happiness.

"It's... it's ok." And it was. They'd saved Sword from her corruption, and how many other of his teammates had briefly slipped into that state, but been pulled back? Even Diyem. "I forgive you."

"You might not be Xerneas but... you still care. I mean you just proved that, didn't you? You still want to protect life and help people. That's a start, right?" he offered a smile, a genuine one, his eyes shining. His heart still raced and he still felt shaken, but he somehow felt... a little proud of Xernatus? Or perhaps proud for them.

 

[Namohysip]

Xernatus flinched, looking at the tree, then Koa. "I..." His face--which was hard to read--seemed to scrunch up. "I don't... understand... I just don't..."

And, finally, the serpent fell to the ground, making a sound between a squeak and a whimper. Confused and overwhelmed, no doubt, all he could do was let out a wordless, helpless cry as he buried his face in the snow. The cold stung, but it helped.

 

[Flyg0n]

Koa stared dumbly at Xernatus for a second, caught off guard. He'd never been good when it came to people crying or being sad. Had he caused this? Was he being too much? Should he pat them on the head or something?

Pushing himelf to his feet, he walked over to Xernatus slowly, a little stiffly. This being really was practically younger than him in a way. That was weird. He was older than something that looked like a legendary.

Gently, he nudged their head with his snout. "Hey uh... it's alright," he murmured. What was he supposed to say? Something comforting? Something funny?

Perhaps... a memory flashed through his mind, of when he'd been younger and something happened, he didn't even remember what; and came home crying. Blake never said a word to him, just led him to the couch. His cousin had just sat there and let him cry, but he never left.

Taking a breath to quiet the drumming of his heart, he lay down in the snow next to Xernatus, his body next to theirs, not quite pressing against it yet leaning into it slightly still. His fur just barely brushed against their body, enough to hopefully let Xernatus know he was there. That they weren't alone.

Letting out a soft sigh, he lay his snout on his paws and remained quiet, yet present.

 

[Namohysip]

A long time passed in that cold silence, punctuated occasionally with Xernatus making little sniffles or shifting his weight. He occasionally mumbled about being undignified, or letting himself go, or so many other things that he also wondered in the same breath if they mattered. But as that time passed for even longer, and as Xernatus finally seemed calm enough to breathe evenly, he glanced at Koa. He still said nothing, but it was an acknowledgement that he was there.

Finally, he was calm enough to speak.

"I don't know what my choices are."

 

[Flyg0n]

Koa remained quiet through it all, until Xernatus finally seemed ready to speak.

For a good minute, he thought about his answer. He didn't want to rush into this response. "Honestly... there's a lot," he said finally. "I mean, you really can do anything..." he snorted and shook his head to himself. "Heck, you could join Diyem and help fight at the tree if you wanted." The way he said the idea was less of a real idea, more thinking out loud. Getting the extreme one out of the way.

"Maybe you can start with something simple. Like... what do you want people to call you? I sorta was calling you Xernatus in my head for awhile," he said, chuckling awkwardly. "But you can pick something new if you want."

 

[Namohysip]

"I don't... really know what sort of name I should have." Xernatus looked down. "I think... I--I need time for... something like that. I've spend... well, 'spent' so much time as Xerneas, I don't know what I would go by otherwise. But... but to help out against... the Tree?" Xernatus looked away. "Would I even be allowed back? It's... Xerneas' grounds. Not mine..."