• Welcome to Thousand Roads! You're welcome to view discussions or read our stories without registering, but you'll need an account to join in our events, interact with other members, or post one of your own fics. Why not become a member of our community? We'd love to have you!

    Join now!

Pokémon Drowning

Chapter 1

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
You have made us for Yourself,
And our hearts are restless
Until they rest in You​

Hello, everyone! This is a fic that I started writing close to seven years ago. After posting it elsewhere, I decided it was time to bring it here. As of 4 March 2021, chapters 1-7 have been rewritten.

One important thing to note: this fic uses the ORIGINAL designs for Team Aqua and Team Magma. I started writing this before there was any official word of Pokemon Omega Ruby or Alpha Sapphire so I had the original designs in mind (and quite honestly, I prefer them, but that's just my personal taste ^_^;)

Our very own Dragonfree did a beautiful depiction of the main character, Maressa, which you can see here.

Any comments or criticisms are greatly appreciated! Enjoy!

Banner.png
Credit for the banner goes to Sketchie at Serebii!
Rated PG-13 for violence and some swearing.


Chapter 1



I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas.



The storm raged endlessly. Lightning sparked in mile-high clouds, throwing their black depths into sharp relief before the skies succumbed to darkness once more. The heavens tore open, sending sheets of rain down upon the turbulent seas.

In the roaring waters, a wooden ship plowed through the salty sea, miniscule in comparison to the endless abyss. Men on board raced to and fro, hauling buckets of water, desperately grabbing hold of lines, tying objects down, trying to control the sails. Three men stood together at the wheel in an attempt to prevent the ship from spinning out of control.

Black walls of water raged higher and higher; each new monstrous wave crashed down only to be replaced by one bigger than itself. The waves fell, retreated, and returned more powerful and numerous than ever before. Fighting to stay afloat was akin to fighting a hydra: the more progress they appeared to make, the more hopeless the situation became.

At last, as the ship fell into a trough, as rains lashed the bulwarks, as the faces of every sailor looked up in terror at the wall of water looming over them, highlighted by a burst of lightning, they gave in. The men at the wheel let go: the ship spun, capsizing, and a second later was completely submerged as the wave slammed down on it.

The fragments of the magnificent ship and its passengers all descended into the calmness of the deep, the latest victims of the thirsty storm.

We have lingered in the chambers of the sea
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown
Till human voices wake us,
And we drown.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“No, Golduck, careful—no—OW!”

Maressa jerked back as Golduck wolfed down a piece of dried jerky in her hand—he had reached too far and clamped his bill over her fingers.

“Be more careful!” she snapped at him as he eagerly ate up the food.

“Maressa, you okay?”

Maressa turned her head to see her teammate, Sarah, striding over to her.

“Yeah, my Golduck just nipped my fingers a bit hard.”

Golduck rolled his eyes and quacked something—Maressa couldn’t quite hear what. Even though he didn’t speak with words the same way that humans did, he and Maressa had been together for so long that she perfectly understood his every mannerism and quack.

Sarah sat down next to Maressa. The estuarine waters rippled beneath the moonlight; the tiny submarine they sat on lay motionlessly in the gentle flow. Sarah straightened her blue Team Aqua bandanna as she gazed at Golduck.

“Do you always keep your Pokemon out of his Pokeball?”

“Not always, but it’s nice to have someone to hang out with—especially when our job is to literally do nothing,” she announced with a glare at the empty area. A few Vigoroth swung from the nearby trees surrounding the banks, but aside from that, the night was totally silent.

“Well,” Sarah said, “keeping watch is referred to as grunt work for a reason!” Taking a Pokeball out of her pocket, she looked at it thoughtfully. “It’d be nice to hang out with my Sealeo more.”

“Why don’t you bring him out? I’m sure my Pokemon would love to meet him!”

“He prefers colder areas, and whenever I bring him out somewhere warm like this, he gets really uncomfortable quickly.”

Maressa nodded. “That makes sense—sorry to hear that, though.”

“King! Seaking!”

The two women looked at the waters and saw a large Seaking poking his head above the surface, bobbing in the gentle ebb of the river.

“Oh, hey, Seaking!” Maressa said. “Want to meet Sarah? She’s one of my teammates!” Maressa smiled at Sarah. “Seaking loves attention—you can go ahead and pat him! He’d be really happy if you talked to him, too.”

Scooting closer to the edge of the submarine, Sarah reached out a shaky hand and patted Seaking’s scaly head. Sure enough, Seaking closed his eyes and fluttered his fins happily; Sarah’s tentative smile tuned into an adoring one.

“For something so big and scaly, he’s really endearing!”

Maressa smiled proudly. “Yep. Not the most confident Seaking yet, but we’re getting there. Hey, Seaking, where are Sharpedo and Lanturn, huh?”

As with Golduck, Maressa had grown to understand her other Pokemon and what they told her. Seaking swam in a few circles while chirping—Sharpedo and Lanturn were still hanging out underwater, but they weren’t far!

“Hey, what’s going on—woah, it’s a party up here!”

Maressa and Sarah turned to see a tan woman with long brown hair emerge from the submarine hatch.

“Hey, Cloe,” Sarah said with a smile. “What’s up?”

“Nothing—literally nothing is going on down there. How about up here?”

“Same,” Maressa said as she ripped up a strip of dried jerky and threw it at Golduck—he tried to catch it but missed and it smacked him in the face. He glared at her.

“You guys got your Pokemon out? Come on, Corsola, join the fun!”

Cloe took out a Pokeball, and a blue and pink spiny Pokemon emerged.

“Corsola!” she chirped happily before scuttling into the water on her short legs.

Sarah frowned. “Isn’t brackish water bad for Corsola?”

“Only if I leave her in there all day—she’ll be fine if it’s just a few hours,” Cloe said as she laid back on the submarine, looking up at the moonlit sky.

“And won’t Commander Shelly noticed that you’ve disappeared?”

Cloe waved a dismissive hand. “Nothing is happening down there, anyway. They’re supposed to be running tests on the water quality, flow, sedimentation, yada yada—but there’s about four people running them. There are too many of us and not enough things to do, so Shelly is having all of us clean the ship. There’s no way she’ll notice if one of us leaves for a bit.”

Maressa laid down next to Cloe and sighed. “I can’t wait to finally go on a real assignment!”

Cloe’s face lit up. “Oh yeah? Where are you going after this?”

“Mt. Chimney,” Maressa said with a proud smile. “Shelly said she’s really happy with my battling ability—”

Quack! Golduck cut her off.

“… Our battling ability. She wants to take us on a real mission!”

“So cool!” Sarah said. “What are you going to do?”

Maressa frowned and shrugged. “I dunno. Apparently there was a recent meteorite landing, and Shelly says Team Aqua can use it—I don’t know what for, but she wants us to get it first and put it to good use.”

“Who else would be after a meteorite?”

“Maybe some nerds who like to study rocks. Shelly’s also worried about Team Magma going after it.”

Sarah grimaced as if she had smelled something nasty. “Those people who just want to dry up the oceans?”

“Yeah,” Maressa spat. “I hope we don’t run into them… Although it’d be kinda fun to get the chance to get in a real Pokemon battle! Not just a training simulation like we do all the time here."

Cloe, who had been watching her Corsola splash around with Maressa’s Seaking, turned her head to Maressa. “You and your Pokemon really enjoy battling, huh?”

“Yep!” Maressa said proudly as her Golduck glanced at her. “It’s all this guy is good for, anyway—HEY!”

She spat as Golduck shot a blast of water at her. Her blonde hair hung lankly around her face as she glared at Golduck, who gazed back at her smugly with his bill sticking high in the air.

“Why would you say that about your Golduck?” Cloe asked.

“I don’t mean it—and you know that!” she shot at Golduck as he stared cheekily back at her. “You wouldn’t have hung around me for nineteen freaking years and followed me to Hoenn if I only battled with you!”

Sarah started. “Nineteen years? I wasn’t even allowed to have a Pokemon nineteen yeas ago!”

Maressa averted her eyes. “Well, I wasn’t, either… But we worked around it… without really telling anyone.

“Don’t look at me like that!” she said in response to Sarah’s and Cloe’s doubtful stares. “When I was four years old, I came across Psyduck and we became friends—I wasn’t allowed to have Pokemon yet, so I just saw him whenever I played outside. Once I was old enough, I caught him, my family moved from Kanto to Hoenn, and now we’re here. That’s not bad—we’re all Team Aqua members, and you guys know this organization isn’t legal!”

“That’s true,” Cloe said, “but Team Aqua isn’t bad, either—oceanic conservation without government regulations and stopping Team Magma isn’t exactly ‘bad.’”

Wiping water out of her eyes, Maressa asked, “So where are you guys going next?”

“Slateport Museum!” Cloe said. “I’m going in as a volunteer during the day, seeing what data they already have on water flow, oceanic currents and sediments—seeing what data already exists so we don’t have to measure it, y’know?”

“That’s cool! I was hired into Team Aqua after they saw I studied ocean currents in college—I really liked math and calculus, so I looked into how they worked and all that.”

“Neat! I’m a math person, too. Are they having you battle instead because they need more battlers?”

Maressa shrugged. “I guess. They saw my training simulations with all my Pokemon, told me it was good, asked how I felt about primarily doing Pokemon battles, and all of my Pokemon were cool with it.” She looked up at Sarah. “What about you? If I’m going to Mt. Chimney and Cloe’s going to Slateport, where are you going?”

“I don’t know yet. Shelly told me that she might transfer me to Matt’s squad, so we’ll see how that goes.”

Golduck slithered from the submarine into the estuary to join the other Pokemon. The three grunts sat quietly for a moment, gazing out at the dark waters that rippled with liquid moonlight.

Sarah smiled thoughtfully. “This reminds me of growing up in Mossdeep: when I was a kid, my friends and I used to go sit at the cliffs and watch the Wailmer come out of the water. We called it Wailmer Watching.”

“What’s Mossdeep like? I’ve never been there!”

“It’s beautiful! We’ve got sandy beaches, mangrove forests, and rocky tidepools. Every year, we have a festival for the Millennium Comet, and it’s actually coming this year! It’s a week-long celebration of singing, dancing, and having a ton of food and drink!” The dreamy smile soon faded from her face. “Too bad I have to miss it.”

“You can’t get off work?!”

“No,” she said sadly. “I asked Commander Shelly, and she said that Team Aqua has to be a priority.”

“Well, Shelly can take her priorities and shove them up—”

Maressa was cut off by the sound of the hatch opening. A woman wearing a blue bandanna with bushy red hair emerged from the submarine. Her red eyes were narrowed with displeasure, she slightly held her chin up, and a haughty air hung about her.

“Is Cloe up here?” Commander Shelly asked.

“Crap!” Cloe hissed.

“What are you all doing?” the Commander demanded as she walked onto the deck, her hands on her hips. “You—” she jabbed a finger at Cloe— “are supposed to be inside, cleaning the windows! And you two—" she pointed to Maressa and Sarah— "are supposed to be on watch! Tell me, how are you watching anything when you are lying on your backs?”

The three grunts immediately leapt to their feet.

“There’s no one out here,” Maressa said hastily, “and besides, my Pokemon have been scouting the waters, and they say they haven’t seen anyone!”

Shelly raised an eyebrow.

“Really?”

Maressa turned her head and her heart sank when she saw Golduck and Corsola wrestling with Seaking. Corsola clung to Seaking’s horn, yipping like a cowgirl as Seaking bucked up and down; Golduck had his arms wrapped as far around Seaking as they would go, trying to hold on while Seaking vigorously tried to shake them off.

Shelly let out a hiss (maybe it was supposed to be a sigh) as Cloe and Maressa recalled their Pokemon into their Pokeballs.

“Just because you’re going out on missions soon doesn’t mean you can slack off. Being a Team Aqua member demands a lot of responsibility!”

“Yes, Commander Shelly,” the three of them said reluctantly.

She nodded. “Cloe, into the submarine.”

With a glance of terror at the other grunts, Cloe did as she was told.

“Sarah, go in with her, too. I want to talk to Maressa for a moment.”

Maressa’s stomach knotted. This wasn’t good.

As Sarah walked away, Maressa desperately wanted to cling to her and beg her to stay so she didn’t have to listen to Shelly all by herself—

But Sarah soon disappeared into the submarine, too.

The Commander sighed. “Maressa, I’m very disappointed in you.

“We have a lot of hope for you, you know. I’m taking you with me to Mt. Chimney tomorrow because I believe you can handle it. I’ve seen the way your Pokemon fight, and I know you say that you care about the ocean—but you have to prove it. We didn’t find out about the meteorite on our own; it was through a spy we have on Team Magma. They’re going after that meteorite, so we are, too.”

Maressa’s stomach dropped.

“We will fight Team Magma tomorrow, Maressa. And you need to prove that you and your Pokemon are willing to work hard for Team Aqua. Standing out here on watch is easy. If I can’t trust you with a simple task like that, how can I trust you to do something that carries as much weight as a Pokemon battle?

“There may be a point where your loyalty is tested. If you want to be a member of Team Aqua, you must be willing to fight for it.”

Maressa bowed her head slightly as a trickle of shame bled into her heart.

“Yes, Commander Shelly. I’m sorry. I promise you, we’ll work hard from now on—we won’t let Team Aqua down.”

Shelly nodded. “Good.

“Now give me fifty push-ups.”

“WHAT?!”

The Commander stared back impassively at Maressa’s open-mouthed shock.

“I didn’t stutter. Searching Mt. Chimney is physical work. You want to prove you’re capable, don’t you?

“Fifty push-ups. Now.”

Maressa pursed her lips in anger—her disdain for Shelly growing ever stronger. She didn’t need to prove she was physically capable of hiking Mt. Chimney—the training simulations had already proven that! She swam four-hundred meters in the open ocean for her dive test; she had run up and down the muddy hillsides of Route 119; she had done free-diving with her Pokemon to more than twenty meters—

And now she needed to prove herself?

Maressa closed her eyes. She wouldn’t let her anger get the better of her—this time. Getting on her hands and feet, she steadily did push-ups while Shelly stood over her. Expending energy usually calmed her down—but as her chest and biceps burned, so did her resentment.

At dawn—Sean and Casey were supposed to relieve her and Sarah at 3 AM but missed their watch—she clambered down into the submarine hatch and sat on her cot, all four of her Pokemon recalled into their Pokeballs.

As she lay on the bed, weariness overtook her, clouding her mind with the bliss of restful sleep. Her upper body was still tender from doing push-ups—but she was excited for what the next day would bring. Recovering and researching a meteorite! Fighting Team Magma! She smiled, a single thought running through her head:

This will all be worth it in the end.
 
Last edited:

Pen

the cat is mightier than the pen
Staff
Partners
  1. dratini
  2. dratini-pen
  3. dratini-pen2
So I instantly found this set-up to be atmospheric--the watch by the water, the moonlight, some lurking unease. I'm also really excited to see a golduck trainer! I don't think I've ever seen that in a fic, and golduck is such a cool pokemon, from its appearance to its psychic nature.

I know this fic is seven years old, so I don't want to belabor anything you're already aware of, but a few points. First, we're getting a lot of exposition dumped in this conversation and the dumping feels pretty obvious. One place it especially stands out is when Sara is complementing Maressa on her skills and relationship with her pokemon. This would really be a place where showing would work better than telling. All these details are great, but we should be able to observe them ourselves when Maressa and her golduck interact, rather than learn them from Sara. The moment with the sharpedo was a good example of that. In that short interaction we at once learn that Maressa is a good water-type trainer and comfortable with all kinds of pokemon.

Next, the conflict. Most of the chapter is a free-floating conversation. It's only in the last few paragraphs that something seems to be wrong, with their replacements not coming. This is a great way to set up the tension, but I would lead with it! What if the chapter started with something like: "It was 2am, and the relief shift still hadn't come." That problem would then frame the rest of the chapter and give some more context for why they're talking about their childhoods to each other.

The moon in the sky looked like a black canopy with a curved tear. Maressa looked over to her friend as she sat up and pushed her blonde hair out of her face.
Something's mismatched in the simile here. I think the order needs to be something like 'The moon looked like a curved tear against the black canopy of the sky.' Right now it feels like moon is being compared to black canopy. These first two sentences use the same main verb 'look' which is an odd repetition to start out a story with.

were it not for the light patterns caused by ripples, Maressa would have thought the water to be perfectly still.
The language is oddly formal here and stands out from the sentences around it.

Maressa combed her hair thoughtfully with her sun-tanned fingers.
This is a strange place to drop the 'sun-tanned' fingers epithet, since she's doing an action that essentially hides her fingers.

She was about to say that Sharpedo was "really a big softy on the inside," but that would be lying; Sharpedo was every bit as ornery as he looked.
Heh, nice line.

"What the hell."
Bit of an awkward place to cut off.
 
Chapter 2

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
So I instantly found this set-up to be atmospheric--the watch by the water, the moonlight, some lurking unease. I'm also really excited to see a golduck trainer! I don't think I've ever seen that in a fic, and golduck is such a cool pokemon, from its appearance to its psychic nature.

I know this fic is seven years old, so I don't want to belabor anything you're already aware of, but a few points. First, we're getting a lot of exposition dumped in this conversation and the dumping feels pretty obvious. One place it especially stands out is when Sara is complementing Maressa on her skills and relationship with her pokemon. This would really be a place where showing would work better than telling. All these details are great, but we should be able to observe them ourselves when Maressa and her golduck interact, rather than learn them from Sara. The moment with the sharpedo was a good example of that. In that short interaction we at once learn that Maressa is a good water-type trainer and comfortable with all kinds of pokemon.
Hey, thanks so much for dropping by to leave a review! I haven't gotten the comment on this being an info dump before, so I appreciate you pointing it out to me (perhaps a version 3 of this fic will be in order? XP)

Next, the conflict. Most of the chapter is a free-floating conversation. It's only in the last few paragraphs that something seems to be wrong, with their replacements not coming. This is a great way to set up the tension, but I would lead with it! What if the chapter started with something like: "It was 2am, and the relief shift still hadn't come." That problem would then frame the rest of the chapter and give some more context for why they're talking about their childhoods to each other.
Fair enough; thanks so much! I intended for them talking to each other to come from the fact that they were put on watch in a deserted area and they felt like there was no need. But point taken!

Something's mismatched in the simile here. I think the order needs to be something like 'The moon looked like a curved tear against the black canopy of the sky.' Right now it feels like moon is being compared to black canopy. These first two sentences use the same main verb 'look' which is an odd repetition to start out a story with.

Thanks so much for leaving a review! I always appreciate it :)





Chapter 2


Maressa tightened the ties of her bandanna as she stared at her reflection. Closing her eyes, she straightened up, took a few deep breaths, and looked at herself once more. She tried to keep calm but her reflection only showed how anxious she was. She paced back and forth, sat down, stood back up, said a prayer—yet nothing would fend off the anxiety that kept attacking her.

Stationing herself before the mirror once more, she stared herself down.

“Once we land, I need the two of you to shut down the cable cars. Understand?”

“Yes, Commander Shelly!”

Maressa looked out the window of Team Aqua’s navy blue helicopter as the rocks and crags of Mt. Chimney passed rapidly beneath, the ground sloping upward to meet their descent. Her heart pounded furiously with excitement—this was it!

“Golduck! Golduck, look—see that red helicopter? Think that’s Team Magma?”

Sure enough, a red helicopter had already landed on Mt. Chimney—Maressa thought she could see people gathered nearby it.

Golduck stood next to her, peering out the window. He didn’t say anything, but Maressa knew he was excited—he thrived off of fighting, and the prospect of a big battle sent adrenaline coursing through both of their veins.

As their helicopter slowed, Maressa tuned around. Several other Team Aqua members stood inside, waiting with anticipation for the mission that lay before them. Seeing a lanky man with a tuft of brown hair, Maressa sidled over to him.

“Hey, Mark, how come Shelly wants us to turn off the cable cars?”

The older grunt looked down at her and flashed a quick smile. “Still new to this, huh? Turning off the cable cars will prevent civilians from getting caught up in our mess with Team Magma—it’ll also prevent anyone from interfering. Our mission won’t take long, and the cable cars will be back up within a few hours.”

Maressa nodded. “Makes sense to me!”

She looked back out the window, practically bouncing with excitement. “Golduck, can you imagine how Mt. Chimney will look once it’s made dormant? Maybe it’ll turn into a crater lake! Those are so beautiful—I’ve never seen one, though, but I heard they’re really neat, unique ecosystems!”

Mark looked out the window next to Maressa. “That’s the goal! By stopping Mt. Chimney, we won’t only prevent catastrophic lava flows, but it can become a fresh new environment for all sorts of Pokemon, and not just Water-types.”

“Mark.”

“Yes, Commander Shelly?”

Shelly walked over to him, her blue-gloved hands resting on her hips. “You’re in Squad B to stop the cars. You know what you need to do? And is your Crawdaunt ready?”

Mark pulled a Pokeball out of his pocket. “He sure is!”

Shelly nodded curtly. She glanced at Maressa and her eyes gravitated towards Golduck—for a split second, Maressa saw disdain shine behind her red irises. Shelly said nothing and turned away—

But if there was something about Golduck, Maressa wanted to know.

“Is something wrong?”

Shelly turned around and looked at Golduck again. “Is he normally out of his Pokeball?”

“Sometimes—he likes to hang outside with me when he can. Is that a problem?”

“Not in itself, no. But look around—this helicopter only has space for our team. We can’t all bring out Pokemon out—what if I wanted my Ludicolo? He would practically fill the center cabin.” Her red eyes glanced at Maressa. “In short, it’s not a problem—but in the future, I’d like you to think about the limit of space and ask for permission.”

Maressa said nothing; she watched in stony silence as Shelly turned around and called for the team to prepare to disembark. Maressa’s blood boiled—Shelly wanted her to ask permission just to have her Pokemon out? What kind of a crazy rule was that? Did she even think about what Golduck wanted?

Mark noticed her sour mood.

“Maressa, you need to calm down. Shelly’s just saying what she thinks is the most reasonable—”

THUD!

The helicopter touched down—Maressa lost her balance and fell back on the wall behind her and bumped her head. She clutched it, grimacing as she heard Shelly’s voice ring out.

“Team Aqua, let’s move out!”

“Yes!”

The sea of blue bandannas followed Shelly out of the helicopter—Maressa’s anger washed away and excitement filled her as she joined the group, descending the metal gangplank and gathering together out in the open air.

She blinked her eyes at the harshness of the sun—there were no trees or cloud cover to protect them from the blinding rays. The solar rays baked the rocks they stood on, filling the air with warm heat. At the very least, a cool mountain breeze sang through the air, offering a small degree of respite. Above their heads, a grey cloud rose from the volcanic crater as a testament to its life and activity.

Maressa’s heart jumped in her throat what she saw them—a swam of horned, red hoodies gathered before Team Aqua. Between the two teams, a bespectacled man clutched a porous rock to his chest as he anxiously glanced back-and-forth between them.

Team Magma members were gathered in a semicircle around the man; a lone team member stood on a rocky shelf above the others, surveying Team Aqua with impatience. A pair of white stripes gripped his pant legs in distinguishing his rank above the rest.

“B Squad, secure the cable cars!” Shelly announced.

“Right!”

Maressa watched Mark and another member take off at a jog towards a small building connected to large cables. She wished Mark could have stayed—he had been very patient and helpful with showing her the ropes, so far.

“What are you doing here, Team Aqua?” the Magma Commander called.

“Oh, Field Commander Tabitha, we’re just out here looking for some meteorites, and that nice man there is going to give his to us.”

Shelly’s voice was much less assertive when speaking to her enemies—it was still haughty, but Maressa noticed the playful, teasing quality it held. She frowned. This was how Shelly spoke to the people who wanted to destroy Team Aqua?

“The altitude is affecting your brain,” he sneered.

“Well, would you like to settle this the old-fashioned way, then?” Shelly asked as she took out a Pokeball. Several grunts on both teams took out Pokeballs, too, and Golduck started to crawl forward—

“Commander, the meteorite!”

All heads jerked to a Team Magma grunt pointing at the scientist, who was making a getaway through the rocky crags and hills that jutted out on Mt. Chimney—and for someone his age, he was fast.

“Squad One, go after him!” the Magma Commander announced.

“You four—” Shelly pointed to the people on her right—“after him! We’ll take care of things here. Go, Crawdaunt, Walrein!”

At her command, the rocky area filled with bright blue pinnipeds and dark red crustaceans.

“Go, Mightyena, Golbat!”

Maressa’s heart sank when she saw the matchup—Crawdaunt and Walrein were technically stronger Pokemon, and Walrein had a type advantage over Golbat—but the terrain was completely disadvantageous for Team Aqua. Golbat and Mightyena were fast—Crawdaunt were laughably slow, and Walrein were practically immobile. She prayed that their defenses were high enough to last them.

“Crawdaunt, bubble beam! Walrein, water gun!”

“Golbat, air cutter and Mightyena, hyper beam!”

Commanders and grunts shouted commands for their Pokemon and it all quickly dissolved into chaos. Maressa was grateful to see that Golduck was agile enough to dodge the attacks—he hid under a jutting rocky overhang, the red jewel on his forehead glinting as he spied his attackers.

A few Golbat shrieked in frustration as their attacks bounced uselessly off the rock.

“After him!” the Team Magma grunt across Maressa shouted. “Drive him out of there with poison fang!”

The Golbat swooped low and headed straight for Golduck as he crouched beneath the rock overhang.

“Now!” Maressa shouted.

Once the Golbat were within Golduck’s sight, his eyes glowed purple and lances of psychic energy pelted towards the incoming Golbat. The Poison-types screeched as they reeled back in pain before falling to the ground.

“Great job!” Maressa shouted as the Team Magma grunt recalled his unconscious Golbat. “Let’s go help the others!”

Golduck joined her as they ran over the rocks and crags. Maressa ran up next to a Team Aqua member she didn’t know while Golduck went over to his Walrein. Her teammate’s forehead was wet with sweat—from the heat or stress, Maressa wasn’t sure, but she was willing to bet it was a combination of both.

Maressa surveyed the situation: the Team Magma grunt’s Mightyena was running circles around Walrein and evading all of the Water-type’s attacks.

“Golduck will hold Mightyena still and your Walrein can take him out. Sound good?”

Her teammate glanced at her and nodded.

“Golduck, fight the Mightyena in close combat!”

“Mightyena, use crunch!”

Golduck and the Mightyena tackled each other furiously. Golduck wrapped his arms around the Dark-type’s neck. The Mightyena sank her jaws into Golduck’s side, but she soon let go and was gasping for air.

“Walrein, use sheer cold!”

The canine looked up in terror as the Walrein flopped over to her. Ice coated the Walrein’s tusks. The temperature plummeted; the air shimmered. Once he reached the Mightyena—who was squealing and desperately trying to get out of Golduck’s grasp—the Walrein brought his tusks down on her side. Lances of ice seared through the Dark-type’s body and coated her with frost—she stopped moving.

“Great job, you two!” Maressa called. “Come on, Golduck, let’s go help the others!”

Maressa and Golduck helped out other Team Aqua members with whatever they needed—Golduck pinned down Golbat while Crawdaunt clubbed them unconscious and he baited Mightyena so Walrein and Sealeo could shoot them down with water and ice attacks.

The team members that Maressa aided joined her and Golduck as they took on more Team Magma grunts. Eventually, Maressa saw that she was very near to Shelly, who was still engaged in battle with the Team Magma commander.

“Go, Ludicolo!”

Maressa stared in awe at the massive, yellow-husked Pokemon dominating the center of the battlefield. She hung back—she had never seen Shelly’s Ludicolo battle before! And this might be a good opportunity to let Golduck rest.

Shelly glanced back and saw the group of Team Aqua members hanging around her.

“Don’t just stand there! Talk with Mark and help him get the meteorite!”

Maressa had no headset and had no way to get in touch with Mark—should she have followed the rest of the squad and helped them out anyway? Maybe… But after being in the thick of battle, she didn’t want to give it up and go scavenging with the rest of them.

“Nature power!”

The air around Ludicolo shimmered—rocks ripped up from the ground and he hurled them in the air. Several Golbat squeaked as the rocks bruised their frail bodies and pinned down their thin wings.

But several Golbat still glided through the air untouched.

“Stun spore!”

Clouds of yellow spores puffed from the center of Ludicolo’s lily pad—dust filled the air and flew along in the breeze—Maressa covered her mouth and nose with her shirt.

She wasn’t convinced using stun spore out in the open was a good idea—but Ludicolo was doing damage! Golbat dropped out of the sky and fell flat on the rocks, clearing the air.

“Hyper beam!”

Maressa jerked her head as a beam—a really bright beam—of orange energy shot from a Mightyena’s mouth. The beam pulverized rocks and hit Ludicolo square in his back. The Grass-type flew face-first into the rock—smoke curled from a circular singe in his husk.

Lowering her shirt, Maressa stared at the Mightyena in awe—that hyper beam was much more powerful than the other ones she had seen so far, and the Mightyena looked larger, more feral—his fur was matted, and every time he opened his mouth, the size of his fangs filled Maressa with primal fear.

Mightyena pounced from his perch next to the Magma Commander and ducked into a shadow—and vanished. He reemerged from another shadow at the far side of the field—on the other side of Ludicolo.

“Ludicolo, behind!”

Shelly was too late—Ludicolo turned just in time to receive a face-full of shadow ball. He was blasted onto his back, panting as he rolled over and stood up.

Maressa watched the two fight: Ludicolo shot any sort of attack that came to mind—bullet seeds, leech sides, bursts of water, different powders… But Mightyena ducked in and out of the shadows as if they were portals, always keeping out of Ludicolo’s reach. The canine snarled, ducked into a shadow—and reemerged laughing from another one.

Veins stuck out in Ludicolo’s bloodshot eyes—it attacked with renewed vigor—it stopped using powder attacks entirely and only did what directly dealt damage—it smacked with its fists down on rocks, crushing them until its knuckles bled and its arms were bruised, always missing Mightyena.

“You see what’s going on, Golduck?”

Golduck nodded as he watched Mightyena dance in circles around the enraged Ludicolo, the canine laughing all the while. He and Maressa knew that Ludicolo’s time was almost up.

“Watch for the shadows—remember the tactics you use when you fight Sharpedo. Don’t let Mightyena get to your head, either—if he starts taunting or tormenting you, try to block him out.”

Golduck nodded again.

“Now, get in there!”

Ludicolo had been reduced to a screaming mess—he was running into random rocks, missing Mightyena entirely and only hurting himself. Bits of rock and rubble clung to his scraped and bruised forehead; the yellow husk encasing his body was broken in several areas. His knuckles bled from constantly pounding them into bare rock. Maressa knew that Shelly would either have to recall him or watch him faint.

As Mightyena yipped and laughed from a hiding spot, Golduck blasted him squarely in the back with a jet of water.

“Arrf!”

Mightyena squealed and turned around—baring his massive white fangs at Golduck as water dripped down his back.

“Mightyena, incapacitate him!”

“Golduck, get rid of the shadows!”

Mightyena ducked into a shadow—Golduck promptly fired psychic beams at the closest jutting rocks, leveling the battle field and exposing it to the sunlight.

Maressa waited with anticipation—she knew the Mightyena had to come out somewhere—

There! Several meters away from Golduck, Mightyena slunk out of a rocky precipice. He trod in a circle around Golduck, softly yipping. Golduck cupped his webbed hands over his ear holes, his eyes following Mightyena all the while.

Her mind ran a mile a minute—the battlefield was wide open, which was good, as Mightyena could no longer duck in-and-out of shadows and needed to stand on open ground. But that also meant that Golduck was stuck in direct sunlight and hot, dry air.

Maressa bit her lip. Psychic attacks were useless, and if Golduck expended water, he’d only wear out more quickly. That left one option:

“Golduck, meet him in close combat!"

“Mightyena, shadow ball!”

Golduck raced on all fours, dodging balls of dark ethereal energy as he hurtled into his opponent. Mightyena squealed as Golduck swiped at him with his claws, ripping up his fur and carving thin red lines into his skin.

“Crunch!”

Tendrils of dark energy swarmed around Mightyena’s jaws—he lunged and sank his fangs into Golduck’s arm.

“Screech!”

A high-pitched shriek emanated from Golduck’s bill—Mightyena jerked his head away from the auditory onslaught.

“Get back and use sand attack!”

“Keep your distance!”

“Hyper beam!”

“Evade!”

Blood rushed in Maressa’s veins—her heart pounded—sweat poured out of every pore in her body—her muscles tensed, ready to jump from the cliff and run into the fight herself. Part of her wanted to—oh, she wanted to!

But Golduck was flagging—his movements grew slower, his jumps weren’t as far. Maressa’s heart twisted and she felt a twinge of guilt.

“Golduck, come here for a moment!”

“Mightyena, regroup.”

The two Pokemon rejoined their trainers. Maressa’s heart panged when she saw how tired Golduck was: dust coated his blue skin, which had turned from slimy to sticky under the noonday sun. He blinked several times, his bill hanging open as he took rasping breaths.

“Oh, poor dude—here, have some water.”

Maressa took a water bottle out of her pocket and poured the whole thing down Golduck’s bill. He swallowed, closed his eyes, and breathed deeply.

“How are you holding up?”

Shrug.

“Do you want to go back into your Pokeball?”

Vehement shaking of his head—no! He’d much rather finish the fight. He could win—he would win!

Maressa sighed as reluctance settled deeper into the pit of her stomach.

“Golduck.”

He cocked his head.

“I hate seeing you get hurt.”

He opened his eyes wide—he didn’t often hear Maressa say something so sappy. He held her hand and quacked. He didn’t blame her for his injuries—someone had to fight this battle, and he was happy to do it. He would do it for her.

Maressa squeezed his hand. “You really are good to me.” Raising her eyes, she saw the Magma Commander crouching before his Mightyena, holding the Dark-type’s face in his hands and speaking softly to him.

The Magma Commander turned his head and met Maressa’s eyes. He stood up. “Are you ready to quit?”

“Never!”

Maressa leapt to her feet, her hands balled into fists, the blood boiling in her veins again as adrenaline coursed through her body.

“Golduck, let’s finish this!”

Quack!

The Magma Commander calmly stood up and the Mightyena leapt down from his ledge to be on even footing with Golduck.

She knew it was a gamble—but the battle needed to end, and this was their best shot!

“Hydro pump!”

“Hyper beam!”

Both Pokemon inhaled deeply—a burst of hyper-pressurized water blasted from Golduck’s bill. Bright orange light shone from Mightyena’s jaws and shot forward.

White water crashed into the orange beam—the heat from hyper beam evaporated the water, filling the battlefield with mist. A high-pitched ring sang through the air as energy collided with water.

“Golduck, keep it up!”

“Harder, Mightyena!”

Golduck was on all fours—leaning forward, his feet staggered to brace himself. Loud hissing filled the air—the cloud of mist thickened—a high-pitched whistle grew ever louder—

And Golduck’s strength failed him. The burst of water died—the hyper beam sailed forward, its light throwing Golduck’s face into sharp relief, highlighting the terror in his eyes as his bill hung open.

The beam slammed into Golduck—he soared through the air before being pummeled into the ground as Mightyena’s hyper beam pushed him into the rock—

Then the light died, and Maressa saw Golduck’s form crumpled into the recess.

“GOLDUCK!”

She jumped off the ledge and raced toward her fallen companion—her heart pounded furiously—fear and terror overwhelmed her—her eyes stung with tears—

No, no, no, no, no

Mightyena raced forward—he reached Golduck first, grabbed the blue head in his jaws and shook him.

“Get away from him!” Maressa screamed. She flew forward as quickly as she could—she had to—she needed to—she needed Golduck to be okay—that was all that mattered—

Mightyena let go of Golduck’s head and growled at Maressa—someone whistled and the canine retreated, forgetting about her entirely.

Maressa sprinted forward and dropped to her knees once she reached Golduck.

“Golduck? Golduck, I’m here—I’m here—it’s going to be okay…”

She reached down and picked Golduck up with shaking hands, laying him in her lap. She watched his chest slowly rise and fall. His body was covered with dirt and scratches; blood oozed from several cuts; he was so dry—he had never been this dry. Maressa tried to pick out the rocks stuck to his body—but guilt constantly washed over her, filling her and welling up in tears in her eyelids and rendering her shaking hands useless.

“Golduck?”

No response.

Closing her eyes, she laid her forehead against his own. Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks.

“I’m so sorry.”

She opened her eyes and gazed through the blur, grimacing as her throat tightened—she felt totally helpless as she gazed at Golduck’s unmoving form. All she wanted was for him to be okay, to say something, to do something—to let her know that he was all right and would recover quickly.

A shadow fell. The horned silhouette of a hoodie stood above her, the sun faming him like a halo. The Team Magma Commander looked down at her with his dark eyes, a small smile on his face.

Maressa immediately whipped out Golduck’s Pokeball and withdrew him. She leapt to her feet—and wheeled around as she heard a growl.

Mightyena stood behind her—Maressa shrank back when she saw him bare his enormous fangs and snarl. His fur was matted with blood and caked with dust. He breathed haggardly, his tongue hanging out.

“Don’t worry.”

Maressa turned around. The Magma Commander stood before her with his arms crossed, the small smile still on his face. His voice was surprisingly soft but full of confidence.

“He won’t attack you—unless I tell him to. Well done, by the way.” His eyes shone with approval. “That was an excellent battle. We haven’t fought that hard in over a year.”

Maressa was stunned—her mouth was dry and couldn’t form any words—not that she could think of any. Stuck between the Magma Commander and Mightyena, she felt horribly helpless. She didn’t want to look at the Commander—but she didn’t want to look at the angry Mightyena, either.

She tensed as the Magma Commander stepped closer to her—but another snarl from Mightyena prevented her from moving. She watched the Commander walk up to her, her heart stuck in her throat, completely frozen beneath the harsh sun.

“What’s your name?”

Maressa could only stare at him as sweat poured from her forehead and her heart beat heavily with fear and dread. The Magma Commander continued to survey her with his calculating gaze.

“I haven’t seen you before. Are you new? Or just new to fighting missions? I can tell you’re not new to battling—not after seeing you and your Golduck together.”

He stood at only an arm’s length from her—she desperately wanted to get away. She had no Pokemon; she didn’t think she could take him in on a fist fight (not that she wanted to try). But she couldn’t do anything.

What was he going to do to her?

Loud hissing filled the air—the three of them turned their heads. A steady stream of smoke that had constantly issued from the peak of the volcano died down, leaving empty air in its wake. Maressa stared uncomprehendingly at the dissipating cloud.

“Flame One here, report. Where are you?”

The Commander sounded calm as he spoke into his headset but Maressa shuddered when she saw the anger and loathing shine behind his black eyes.

The Commander’s gaze switched from where the cloud had dissipated to Maressa, and her heart sank as she bore the weight of his calm fury.

“Round up all the Pokemon and report back to the helicopter immediately,” he said, his gaze still on Maressa.

“Well done,” he told her, but his voice was no longer coy—there was a fury hiding behind the calmness of his voice. “I see you don’t have a headset. Your team just got the meteorite and cooled off Mt. Chimney.”

Under his angry gaze, Maressa couldn’t feel happy about the good news.

“And seeing as you have no Pokemon left, I could take you with us now…”

His gaze turned calculating and thoughtful once more as he cocked his head.

Maressa’s heart skipped a beat—

Take me with them?

No, no, no, no, no—that couldn’t happen—did that ever really happen?

Before she could say anything, the Commander straightened up, took out a Pokeball, and withdrew his Mightyena.

“I don’t have time,” he said. “And you’ve earned your freedom today. Go back to your team—but you should reconsider being with Team Aqua. They might be a team for Water-type Pokemon, but there’s nobody on that team who can coach you in battling the way we could.”

Without another word, he turned and hurried off. Maressa stared after him, finally feeling a trickle of relief amidst the sea of dread in her heart.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Beep.

The heart monitor dully sounded as the lone voice in the room. All the patients slept soundly in their beds. A few groggily blinked their eyes before returning to heavy sleep. Nearly every patient was hooked up to an IV tube, the multitude of which formed a plastic jungle. A nurse walked around, checking tubes, administering food, and adjusting pillows to make the patients more comfortable.

Maressa clasped her hands and hunched over. It seemed that the Magma commander had been right: while she and Golduck were fighting, her team left, secured the meteorite from the scientist, and put Mt. Chimney to sleep for good. Though Shelly ordered the team to get back to work when they returned, most of the squadron put together a party. Maressa had walked into the grunt’s lounge, looking for Sarah to ask if she could borrow a pair of gloves and instead found people celebrating their successful mission.

Maressa couldn’t stay. She couldn’t celebrate—she had half-hoped that, in finding Sarah, she could have someone to talk with. Someone to talk to about Golduck’s injuries, about how guilty she felt for letting him get hurt—not just allowing it to happen, but for enabling it.

But when she saw Sarah and Cloe celebrating with the rest, she couldn’t pluck up the nerve to take them out of the celebration. Golduck’s injuries were her fault—no point in putting the burden on anyone else.

A Walrein behind her let loose a deep sigh as it rolled over. Though Maressa loved her teammates, she couldn’t feel justified in celebrating with them. Their mission worked out but her battle was a disaster. She succeeded in holding Team Magma off but every time she looked at Golduck’s damaged form, the word “success” didn’t seem right.

The guilt didn’t go away. The longer she sat with Golduck, the more her eyes rested on his various cuts, scrapes and bruises; on the IV tubes hooked up to him; and on his exhausted frame, the worse she felt.

How could she not feel like a horrible human being? She considered Golduck her best friend—he was her best friend—and because of her, he was laying on a hospital bed.

She checked her watch; she had been sitting there for nearly two hours. Her stomach rumbled but she wasn’t in the mood to eat. The nurse said that Golduck just needed to re-hydrate and rest for a few days but Maressa didn’t want to leave him until she saw in full health.

Rubbing her temples, she groaned when she thought of the next assignment she had been given. She glanced up at Golduck, wishing she could stay with him, but she was due to move out in two days and he needed more time than that to recover.

“You did an excellent job,” Shelly told Maressa when they had returned to the helicopter. Maressa was still shaken from her encounter with the Team Magma Commander. “I understand your Golduck lost, but you really pulled through with helping me and Ludicolo. There’s a group going diving to research ruins soon—you can take your other Pokemon and help them out!”

Maressa sighed when she thought back to Shelly, her eyes shining with pride—and thinking of it did make Maressa feel better about herself, at least a little. But even that didn’t bridge the river of guilt that coursed through her heart.

She reached over and touched Golduck’s webbed hand. The bandages wound around his arm covered the needle connecting to an IV tube. His body was marred with slashes and scrapes. At her touch, he opened his eyes slightly, gave a grateful nod and then closed them again.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

He gave her a quizzical look.

“This was my fault. I knew you were exhausted, and I had you use hydro pump.”

Golduck shook his head slightly—he didn’t hold her to any blame.

Still unhappy, Maressa took her hand away while Golduck closed his eyes again and returned to sleep.

She thought back to the mission overall: none of her teammates had gotten hurt, which was a huge positive. And with Mt. Chimney cooling off, the crater should fill with water and become a lake at some point—a new ecosystem, one that gave life. Not one that belched out smoke, toxins and lead to death and ruin.

Maressa twisted her hands as she recalled her conversation with the Team Magma Commander.

Would he really have taken me?

Did teams capture each other? She supposed it was possible—but she was still so new at this. And what would they do with each other? Get information? Trade them for… For what?

Burying her head in her hands, she groaned. There was still so much about Team Aqua that she didn’t know—so much that she wanted to know and learn, but she was still so green and things were already happening so fast.

There’s no one on Team Aqua who can coach you in battling the way we can.

Anger sparked in Maressa’s heart—the Team Magma Commander was not better at Pokemon battling than she was. The terrain allowed him to win—Golduck was at a disadvantage. If there had been water nearby, Maressa’s Pokemon would have totally wiped him out.

“Why does he think he would be able to teach us anything? I bet he’s never worked with a Water-type in his life!” she fumed. “And telling me that I ‘earned’ my freedom—he’s not our boss! Why does he think he can say that?”

She looked over at Golduck, blood still boiling in her veins. Why would a Team Magma member want her with them? Team Aqua strove for oceanic conservation and Water-type preservation—Team Magma wanted to destroy that! They didn’t care for or understand Water-types—did they? No, they had tried making an active volcano erupt. How was that supposed to be good for anyone? They weren’t just trying to make more land—they were trying to destroy what was already there!

As her stomach clenched with pangs of hunger, she stood up, giving Golduck one last glance.

“Don’t worry, boy,” she whispered softly. Golduck lay unmoving, eyes still closed.

“One day, we’ll make this right.”
 
Last edited:
Chapter 3

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
Chapter 3


Maressa trudged down the wooden dock. Behind her, the forested hillsides stretched without end. She glanced back—a few miles north lay Route 118, and just west of that was Mauville City.

Home.

A wave of nostalgia washed over Maressa—but at the same time, she felt no desire to go back there, at least not now. There wasn’t anything particular about Mauville—she expected her dad was at work in the Mauville Construction Company while her mom kept up the sewing business at home. Perhaps Mom baked a pie that day, and after dinner she would brew Prince of Sevii tea for her and Dad to share while they talked about anything and everything on their minds…

“Maressa?”

She snapped back and saw Mark staring at her curiously.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” she muttered. “Just thinking about home.”

Mark smiled as he followed her gaze over the grassy hill to the wall of trees. “Are you from around here?”

“Yeah, I mostly grew up in Mauville City. It’s just a few miles northwest of here—Golduck and I used to come to this area sometimes when we were kids.”

“First time being this close to home since you joined Team Aqua, isn’t it?”

“Yep, first time since you told me to not contact them.”

In her mind’s eye, she saw herself—dressed professionally for an interview, about to graduate college—sitting across from Mark, also dressed in business clothing.

“Something has to be done!” Maressa was half-out of her chair, blood coursing through her veins. “The seas are dying and polluted—everyone who steps outside sees it! If the government won’t do anything—if everyday people won’t do anything—if nothing happens—we’ll lose so much more than we realize! There is so much about the oceans we still don’t know—and everything will be gone, poisoned or polluted before we have a chance to discover them! The Pokemon we know and love will also die out if we don’t do something!”

Mark surveyed her with a small smile.

“How badly do you want to save the oceans?”

“More than anything! I’ll—I’ll—there’s nothing more important!”

He leaned forward, his eyes alight with excitement.

“There is a way—and we can invite you into it. But there are many promises you need to make, first.

“Nine months.”

That was how long she was “at sea,” or so she told her parents.

“I got a job with Ocean Incorporated—we’ll be doing research and surveys from oceanic vessels for months at a time, so I won’t be in contact.”

The blue-green horizon blurred and came back into focus as she blinked several times. It made sense—especially as a new recruit, she needed to focus on her time with Team Aqua. And, in a way, being told what she couldn’t do felt freeing—knowing that she could no longer contact her family or talk to them was, in a paradoxical way, a relief. There was no point in thinking about it, no time wasted daydreaming, no dreading what her parents might say if they knew she was doing something “radical.” She had freedom to do exactly as she wanted—exactly what needed to happen.

But she still missed them.

Turning around, she walked with Mark down to the dock. The sunlight scattered across the rippling ocean waters, showcasing a fantastic turquoise that turned dark navy at the reef break. At the end of the dock was what looked like a gargantuan blue cylinder with a small deck and guardrail on top. A skeletal white “A” that matched those on the team members’ bandannas was emblazoned on the side of the vessel.

Several team members clambered in to the submarine while Shelly stood at the head. She nodded when she saw Maressa and Mark.

“Everything is ready. Your diving gear is inside the submarine and there’s plenty of food and water. Mickey is in charge; defer to him for everything.”

Maressa gazed at the blue vessel. “So, this is the ship we’re going into?”

Boat, if you’re not going to call it a submarine. It is not a ‘ship,’” Shelly said crossly. “This is named ‘Ictineo.’” She smiled as she gazed at it. “Quite impressive, and it’s one of Leader Archie’s proudest pieces.”

“Did he help make this?”

“He helped design it when he was at the shipyard,” Shelly said offhandedly.

“Cool! So, where are we going?”

Shelly glared at Mark. “Didn’t you fill her in?”

Mark gulped. “Uhh…”

“Showing the new recruits is your responsibility.”

“Yes—I—this just slipped my mind.”

Shelly rolled her eyes. “Whatever; do it once you’re both aboard. Have her watch Marius on the way to Triangle Rock and then work alongside him when you go near Dewford. I don’t expect proficiency, but I want her at least familiar with it by the time you return.”

“Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait—“ Maressa’s head spun back-and-forth as she panickily looked between Shelly and Mark. “You want me to drive this thing?!”

Steer. But essentially, yes—”

“I don’t know how to pilot a ship!”

Boat! And that’s why you’ll learn. You’ve already been through our submarine courses; you should have been expecting this.”

“Well, yeah, but I didn’t think it would be this soon!”

“You already know the basics and you won’t be alone-you’ll be fine. Besides, didn’t you say you liked math?”

“Yeah, but—”

“Then you’ll catch on,” Shelly said with finality. “Now, both of you, inside and get going! Make Team Aqua proud!”

Maressa followed Mark onto the deck and down through an open hatch while Shelly waited behind on the dock. Her heart beat rapidly—

She had never been inside a submarine, and now she was expected to pilot one? Sure, she had been in that tiny vessel that navigated the rivers and estuaries of Hoenn, but that never went far from land or did the cool stuff.

As she descended to the submarine’s innards, excitement and thrills washed along with the anxiety. She was in a submarine! The kinds that ocean explorers went on—she was really doing this! The halls and ceilings were narrow and cramped, just like she had always imagined it would be! It smelled of saltwater and rotting fish, just like she had always dreamed! And it was cold and foreboding!

Her heart soared with excitement as she followed Mark. As they descended, the halls opened out and several people could walk through them. Large, circular windows dotted the outermost hallways. As soon as she spotted one, Maressa ran up to it and gazed at the murkish water outside, her heart singing with excitement. How easy it would be to see all the sea creatures once they were in the open ocean!

“Maressa, this way.” She followed Mark, her heart bursting to joy—she was living out her dream!

Several other Team Aqua members milled about; the occasional Crawdaunt scuttled by; Maressa also spotted Marshtomp, Mudkip, Lombre and some Sealeo. Her heart panged—she would bring Golduck out, but he was still resting in the hospital.

Not that he wanted to.

“Don’t worry, Golduck,” she had told him—just yesterday, but it already felt so long ago. He lay in bed, much more alert than before, but still hooked to an IV tube and several bandages wound around him.

“We’re meeting up with another team member, and then just going on a scouting expedition. It’s nothing dangerous! Besides, Seaking, Sharpedo and Lanturn are all coming with me.”

He quacked angrily—why couldn’t he go with her? He didn’t want to be the only one left behind!

“I know you feel left out, and I’m sorry—Golduck, I really am.” The excitement died down as she looked at the bandages winding around Golduck and guilt settled into her heart.

He quacked—this wasn’t about being left out, it was that Maressa could be in danger and he wouldn’t be there to protect her! They were supposed to be best friends—why was she telling him to stay behind when he wanted to come along?

“Just look at you!”

She clenched her teeth, trying to hold back tears. “You can’t fight right now! And Shelly thinks you should stay here while you’re like this—so I’m just doing as I’m told! Golduck I…” She sighed. “I hate seeing you like this… And I know that it’s at least partially my responsibility. You are my best friend. But I need to learn to trust them—Team Aqua knows what’s best in this situation. I don’t have a choice in this.”

The anger in Golduck’s eyes died down; his muscles relaxed and he looked ready to drift off to sleep again. He quacked. Maressa always had a choice.

“Crawdaunt!”

Maressa snapped to the present when she spotted a large crustacean standing before her; a few bubbles frothed out of his mouth. She bent down to be eye level with him—which wasn’t very low, as he was a tall Crawdaunt.

“Hey, you’re a cutie! What’re you up to, huh?”

“Hey, Crawdaunt, made a new friend?”

Maressa looked up and saw a man with dark skin standing over his Crawdaunt; any hair he had was completely covered by his Team Aqua bandanna. His bright green eyes alighted on Maressa.

“I don’t think we’ve met before—I’m Mickey.”

“Hi! Maressa.” She shook his hand—perhaps a bit too vigorously in her excitement.

“Oh, Shelly told me about you! She said to take you to Marius. You’ve been filled in on what we’re doing, I assume?” He glanced up at Mark as he finished his question.

Mark stumbled over his words for a second before admitting, “I haven’t really told her anything—I keep forgetting.”

Mickey nodded. “Eh, it’s no big deal. We’ll have plenty of time. Follow me!”

Maressa bounced through the halls after him; Crawdaunt scuttled alongside them, the clacks of its calcareous shell ringing out through the metal tube.

“A member of ours is in Rustboro City right now,” Mickey explained. “He’s picking up something neat the scientists there have discovered—they’re referring to it as ‘creation fluid,’ and apparently it’s got amazing properties for examining and reviving DNA!”

“Reviving DNA?”

“Yeah—you know how a bunch of fossils are ‘trace fossils’—just the imprint of the creature? And then there are ‘body fossils,’ which are the actual Pokemon that’s been turned to stone, essentially. Apparently, this fluid can detect DNA that’s been fossilized and reconstruct a Pokemon out of it!”

“That’s so cool! I didn’t realize we had scientists in Rustboro!”

“Eh… We don’t.”

Maressa stopped walking. Mickey continued on for a few seconds before he realized she was no longer following and looked back. “Maressa?”

“If we don’t have scientists in Rustboro… is this stealing?”

“They call it ‘stealing,’ but in reality, it’s ‘liberating.’ Think about it—this ‘creation fluid’ is so precious, and there’s so little of it, do we really want government-paid scientists to be the ones handling it? They can’t keep track of anything! Science is just a job for them, not a passion. Shelly used to work with these people at Devon—she’s told me before about how irresponsible they are. They just don’t care about the ocean the way we do.”

“Shelly used to work at Devon?”

“Yep, she was a lead researcher. Knows all the behind-the-scenes stuff that goes on, the experiments they conducted. That’s how we know a lot about the environmental state of Hoenn now. She didn’t like Devon or the people there, though. From what she’s told us about them, they’ll probably forget about the fluid and leave it in a freezer until all the primers have decomposed. If we want this stuff to be used right, then we have to make sure it’s done ourselves.”

Something clicked in Maressa’s brain—Mickey was right.

“Better that ‘creation fluid’ be put to good use instead of wasting away!”

He smiled back at Maressa, his face shining with pride. “Exactly. So, we’re going to meet up with the team member. The rendezvous point is at Triangle Rock on the water Route 105—just a bit south of Rustboro City. After that, we’ll head south, to Route 106 near Dewford Town. There are reports that some ancient ruins have been found down there, so we’re gonna go and check them out.”

“We’ll get to go diving?” she asked, practically bouncing off the walls with excitement.

“Of course! There’s all kinds of neat stuff to be found. The water at Dewford is really clear. It’s rocky, and some of it’s hard to get to, so we think this might not have been thoroughly explored before.”

The smile was plastered to Maressa’s face as she followed Mickey through the halls. The sun rays passed through murky water, leaving ever-changing light patterns on the metal panels. She was thrilled—she wanted to get into her diving gear and go out right now!

Mickey glanced back at her. “I hear you’ve done well lately—fighting a commander at Mt. Chimney! Shelly has high hopes for you.”

“Really? She certainly never acts like it,” Maressa said with a hint of bitterness.

“Eh, she’s just not very touchy-feely. She might not say it, but she thinks you’re capable.”

Maressa wanted to reply with a scathing comment as to just what she thought about Shelly’s lack of affirmation—but thought better of it. She wasn’t upset with Mickey; no point in directing her anger at him.

“You’ll be kept busy while on the submarine, but we won’t be at sea for long—maybe a day or two in total. You might’ve noticed that it’s mostly grunts with aquatic Pokemon here. Hardly anyone goes out to the northwest coast of Dewford, so we don’t expect to meet any trouble. Just want to go there, take a look, and come back. But everything needs to be kept in check: all hands to make sure the boat is trim and the nuclear generators need to be maintained at all times—”

“Did you say nuclear?”

Mickey glanced back at Maressa, completely unfazed while she gaped at him in horror. “I did. Nuclear fuel is the cleanest, most efficient way for submarines to travel—”

“But what about nuclear waste? Or byproducts? Doesn’t that destroy habitats for kilometers around?”

He waved a dismissive hand. “That only happens if you’re not careful and allow things to get out of hand. Nuclear fuel is the fuel of the future: clean, reliable and safe. It has potential to go bad, and so most governments don’t want people touching it with a ten-meter pole. The only thing it requires to operate is a constant stream of fresh water. As long as that’s maintained, we’re fine—and so far, we’ve been doing great. Eventually, there’ll be widespread replacement of toxic, deadly fumes with clean nuclear fuel.”

Maressa frowned. She had never heard that about nuclear fuel—but then again, there was so much she didn’t know. All she had heard of nuclear fuel was the potential to build bombs out of it. Was it really that safe and clean?

The hallway soon opened out into a wide area filled with a multitude of panels and screens at which several Team Aqua members sat.

Mickey walked Maressa over to an older gentleman with slick blonde hair.

“Marius!” he announced as the two of them walked up. “I’d like you to meet Maressa. She’s a relatively new recruit.”

Marius smiled at Maressa and heartily shook her hand. “New, eh? Are you ready to learn the ways of navigating and controlling the Ictineo?”

“I sure am!” she said, bouncing up-and-down on the balls of her feet. “This is so cool—I’ve never been inside a submarine before!”

Marius started—his pale blue eyes opened wide as he looked down at Maressa.

“You’ve never even been inside? How are you—oh, nevermind.” He dismissively waved a hand. “Here, I’ll show you around. That’s for the rudder to control yaw, and here are the diving planes to control pitch. This is where we control the diving bells—we won’t need those this time, as we’ll be in fairly shallow water, but I’ll show the controls…”

Maressa hounded him like a lost Poochyena as he pointed to a variety of different panels and gadgets. She tried to memorize each and every bit of information—but it was all so much, so intertwined and so related that she quickly lost track of things.

All at once, the lights in the room went out. Darkness descended like a black cloak, the only source of illumination coming from the myriad of spectral lights emanating from the machines. A few Chinchou sat on the floor, adding the light of their lanterns to those of the navigation screens.

“On our way!” Marius said excitedly.

Maressa’s heart lifted—and then her whole body lifted as the submarine descended to the waters. She was light from the excitement. This was it! They were exploring the ocean—she was in the ocean in a submarine! Her face broke out into a smile, her heartbeat raced uncontrollably as the rush overtook her. She glanced around the room, spying the Chinchou. Taking out a Pokeball, she stared at the fishy form through the translucent cap.

She would love to bring her Lanturn out—but Lanturn wouldn’t be able to breathe air for long, and definitely couldn’t swim quickly enough to keep up with the submarine as it traversed the ocean…

She pocketed her Pokeball. She’d figure something out—eventually. For the moment, she reveled in the rush of adrenaline and soaring excitement as the vessel traversed the ocean depths.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

“Okay, see how this dot shows up—are you watching?”

“Huh? Oh—yes!”

Maressa snapped back as Marius glared pointedly at her with icy eyes. The Chinchou playing and rolling on the floor of the navigation room had caught her attention; watching the two of them wrestle and roll about warmed her heart and made her miss Golduck slightly less—but only slightly.

Marius sighed. “We have been in for a while. Go ahead out and grab some food.”

Maressa exited the dark room, wincing slightly as sunlight streamed in through the portholes. A small Corphish stared at the water outside. What had once been a murky, estuarine brown was replaced with crystal-clear azure. Maressa joined him, feeling a wave of calm wash over her as she gazed into the endless blue.

Myriads of Pokemon swam by them: pods of Wailmer bouncing along in the water’s flow; masses of Tentacool and Tentacruel with brilliant jewels shining like marine fire; groups of Sharpedo and Carvanha darkening the sea with their mere presence; schools of Luvdisc drifting like heart-shaped leaves in the waves; colonies of Corsola displaying their fluorescent pink staghorns; Huntail and Gorebyss with whip-like bodies that coiled and undulated in the sea’s flow; groups of Horsea and Seadra adding a draconic flare to the marine community—Maressa’s heart jumped at the sight of a crowned head with long fins trailing behind it like streamers announcing a regal presence. The Kingdra moved through the water easily, dwarfing its pre-evolutions that swarmed about it. As the sunlight caught its scales, they glistened and shone like hand-carved jasper.

Maressa pressed her face to the glass, a wide smile stuck to her face—Horsea was one of her favorite Pokemon, and to see not only hordes of them but its evolutions—to see a wild Kingdra!—was something she had never expected.

She gasped with delight at the sight of a great, dark wings, spread out like an avian in flight. Its long tail fanned out behind it, catching the sun’s rays in a magnificent dazzle of light. Maressa’s heart beat rapidly as the majestic Mantine passed by them, casually gliding along in the ocean currents.

A Mantine! Those were hardly ever seen in the Hoenn waters!

She gazed at the marvel until it was lost to sight and kept on gazing long after all the schools of Pokemon had left them. Once more, the Ictineo sat as a lone wanderer in the great blue void, plowing forward with a purpose.

Maressa’s stomach rumbled. How long had it been since she had eaten? She looked through empty the hallway. She hadn’t even noticed the Corphish leave.

Shaking herself out of reverie, she walked through the hall, passing portholes that served as portals to the marine realm. Mark would probably tell her to help with keeping the ship “trim,” soon, and she knew she didn’t have long for a break.

She made her way to the mess hall; there were a few tables mostly occupied with other team members wolfing down food. Once she secured a plate of food, she sat down. She didn’t know what the food was: everything was a sort of mushy mass of an off grey-white color. She ate it; it was as cold as winter snow (at least, what she imagined snow would be like) and had no taste.

Hm... Maybe being on a submarine actually kinda sucks.

“Hey! What are you doing? Marius said he wants you back in the navigation room.”

Maressa looked up to see Mickey standing by her with a plate of food.

“Already? I just got out.”

“Yeah, well, that’s the sub life for you. Break’s over!”

Depositing her empty tray in a container for dirty dishes, Maressa wound back through the halls, her outlook growing slightly dimmer with each step—but walking by the portholes reminded her that it wasn’t all bad.

Just mostly bad.

++++++++++++++++++++++++

“Triangle Rock! We just need to pick up Oscar, and then it’s down south!”

Diving planes—we’re ascending!”

Maressa hovered over Marius, watching him activate different controls. She heard a hissing sound—then an unseen weight pulled her down, gluing her feet to the floor as the boat rose through the water.

Loud splashing crashed around them—the boat broke the sea surface. There were sounds of thundering feet hitting the metal floor—a hiss as a hatch opened—the scuttle of clattering claws and the thud of human feet.

With the sound of another loud hiss, all weight seemed to leave Maressa’s body as the submarine returned to the depths and propelled onwards, continuing its journey to Dewford island.
 
Last edited:

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
How fun — seems like we’re working with a similar premise, based on that interaction between Maressa and Tabitha. 👀 Very different approaches though! It’ll be interesting to see how our stories diverge and/or converge. We’ve both got a Mark, but mine is not in Aqua, so that gave me a jolt and a laugh.

I’ll pick up with chapters 2 & 3 since I feel like Pen covered the bases in chapter 1 already.

So I dig the surreal split between Mark (snrk!) as comforting friend/mentor and then ... scary brawler. Definitely unsettling.

I’m curious about Aqua/Magma as a *job* because it’s something I’ve puzzled over before: where do these guys get their funding? I’m also curious what that interview looked like — were they presenting themselves as one thing on the listing, and then their true nature was revealed when she finally met them face to face?

I actually wonder how it would feel if we started chapter 2 with a flashback about how she got involved. I like the moment with Mark comforting her, but I bet you could expand the scene on the docks and squeeze it in there instead. Either way, you’ve got a pattern of starting with Maressa in thought. Atmospheric, yes, but a slow start. Starting more in the middle of things wouldn’t hurt.

I was a little confused on the docks. At first it felt like Maressa was being chatty and following Stern when she she shouldn’t have... but then later it felt like maybe it was part of the plan? I think this is a spot where I did want more atmosphere and sense of place because it would help me see how far she’s strayed from where she’s supposed to be.

The impact of the fight is clear though. She’s a good tactician, but she wasn’t prepared for the way this fight would play out. The earbuds were a nice touch. The brass knuckles felt odd to me though —less suited for knocking someone out than for wrecking someone’s face real bad. I’m wondering why not use pokémon for this? Do they have objections? Or I'm sure there are plenty of items on display around the room that could deliver some blunt-force blows without mangling someone quite so badly — framed map? Ship in a bottle?

I liked her reflections on how her family would react, the struggle of justifying it to herself. Hope we explore them more later in the story! I always enjoy watching characters dig themselves in a hole and wanting to believe they’re doing the right thing. I do wish we had more clarity on Maressa’s commitment to Aqua. I don’t mind that she doesn’t quite grasp what they’re up to, and I’m enjoying the obvious *eyebrow raise* that her blind loyalty invites. But knowing what does make her loyal and trusting of them would make her choices feel stronger, especially because we know she’s operating on at least some blind faith. Liking the ocean isn’t quite enough by itself, otherwise why not just work for the oceanography museum?

Chapter 3 has a lot going on! Nice to see Maressa and her golduck in action. In a couple places, you describe a chain of actions summarily, which lessens the impact. You could ramp up the tension by breaking down the action into shorter sentences with more specific detail. I’ll give you an example:

The Walrein and Crawdaunt were being beat down by the Golbat and Mightyena—Walrein cried out in pain as the Golbat lashed them with air cutter and the Crawdaunt desperately tried to shield themselves from the Mightyena’s hyper beams and shadow balls.
Suggestion: Two golbats shot past. Wind whistled over their wings — then a blast that Maressa felt on her face even at a distance. A walrein cried out in pain and fell. One of the crawdaunts managed to raise a shimmering barrier over itself, only for it to collapse under a shadow ball seconds later. The mightyenas slunk down the hill towards them.

On the other hand, you could stand to thin some of the dialogue. Pausing to ask permission to help does say something about Maressa, who seems unsure of herself, but it also makes it feel like she’s failing to grasp the urgency, which undermines her strategic prowess. An exasperated, “Just get over here!” might be appropriate.

That said, I do think it’s smart that in some places you skim over the action when it’s less important and give more attention to the moments that most want it. In a long battle like this, you have to.

Aqua seems to have a problem with how it treats its pokémon! Maressa has a better eye for strategy and the needs of the pokémon... but duty and loyalty require her to keep her mouth shut. I think it might be interesting to take that angle with golduck at the end, too. As it stands, I wasn’t too worried about him because “fainting” feels like a normal outcome of a battle and he willingly chooses to stay in the fight. If Maressa gives him an order against her better judgment at a superior’s urging, she’s got more to feel guilty over. And then after that she’s basically unarmed and defenseless, right, because her other pokémon need water to move?

I also wondered a little about her relationship with Shelly! In previous chapters Maressa seems in awe of her, which makes me wonder... was Shelly, like your Mark, showing a different face before and now Maressa is seeing the truth? Or had she not worked closely with her yet?

And Tabitha. “Girl, the way you battle is hot. And I’d know — I’m all about volcanoes!” I was a little confused about what his intentions were. Is it just that she’s no longer a threat now that her golduck is down, and therefore he doesn’t care about coming over to gloat? Either way, it feels like he should be focused on other things, so it feels a little off. It might’ve helped to see them interact at a distance leading up to this — some meaningful looks or a laugh across the battlefield? I also share her confusion about his interest in her despite her pokémon... but my hunch is that it’s related to exploring underwater caverns... 👀 (Though it feels a little reductive to count herself out because of her pokemon alone, right? I’d think underlying ideology would be a stronger reason.) Speaking of reasons, I wish he’d added just a tiny bit to his appeal to her: not just “hey you battle good come be my friend instead” but “they don’t appreciate you, do they?” A personal note with some truth to it.

Very curious to see how their next interaction will play out.

Some typos and fussy line fixes:

Her heat panged
Heart *

And re-open the door!”
Just “open.” :)

She found it darkly ironic that Pokémon sustained worse injuries than people on their missions.
It’s not clear where the irony is. If it’s that Aqua claims to be about pokémon health and yet doesn’t treat their pokémon well, that needs to be made clearer.

Glad to have a cohort in Aqua/Magma shenanigans here!🌋❤ 💙 🌊
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pen

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
How fun — seems like we’re working with a similar premise, based on that interaction between Maressa and Tabitha. 👀 Very different approaches though! It’ll be interesting to see how our stories diverge and/or converge. We’ve both got a Mark, but mine is not in Aqua, so that gave me a jolt and a laugh.
Hey! So glad to see you here. And for whatever reason I hadn't noticed Continental Divides--I definitely need to check it out now! I'm such a sucker for Team Aqua and Team Magma :love:


I’m curious about Aqua/Magma as a *job* because it’s something I’ve puzzled over before: where do these guys get their funding? I’m also curious what that interview looked like — were they presenting themselves as one thing on the listing, and then their true nature was revealed when she finally met them face to face?

I actually wonder how it would feel if we started chapter 2 with a flashback about how she got involved. I like the moment with Mark comforting her, but I bet you could expand the scene on the docks and squeeze it in there instead. Either way, you’ve got a pattern of starting with Maressa in thought. Atmospheric, yes, but a slow start. Starting more in the middle of things wouldn’t hurt.
Bot things end up getting covered in later chapters! I appreciate the feedback on them. I had written this many many years ago and by the time my first draft was written I hadn't given much thought to either of these. Both are covered later, but it's helpful to know that they would go better at the beginning of the story instead of later on!

I was a little confused on the docks. At first it felt like Maressa was being chatty and following Stern when she she shouldn’t have... but then later it felt like maybe it was part of the plan? I think this is a spot where I did want more atmosphere and sense of place because it would help me see how far she’s strayed from where she’s supposed to be.
Fair enough! I was trying to show her naivety, so it wasn't supposed to be part of a plan in her part. I was also trying to skim down the atmosphere and detail since I went waaaaay overboard on those in the first draft; I guess I should make expand on them a bit more!

The impact of the fight is clear though. She’s a good tactician, but she wasn’t prepared for the way this fight would play out. The earbuds were a nice touch. The brass knuckles felt odd to me though —less suited for knocking someone out than for wrecking someone’s face real bad. I’m wondering why not use pokémon for this? Do they have objections? Or I'm sure there are plenty of items on display around the room that could deliver some blunt-force blows without mangling someone quite so badly — framed map? Ship in a bottle?
Also fair enough. The point of Maressa doing it was supposed to be Team Aqua testing her obedience, hence why they didn't use Pokemon. But the brass knuckles part I concede on.


Aqua seems to have a problem with how it treats its pokémon! Maressa has a better eye for strategy and the needs of the pokémon... but duty and loyalty require her to keep her mouth shut. I think it might be interesting to take that angle with golduck at the end, too. As it stands, I wasn’t too worried about him because “fainting” feels like a normal outcome of a battle and he willingly chooses to stay in the fight. If Maressa gives him an order against her better judgment at a superior’s urging, she’s got more to feel guilty over. And then after that she’s basically unarmed and defenseless, right, because her other pokémon need water to move?

I also wondered a little about her relationship with Shelly! In previous chapters Maressa seems in awe of her, which makes me wonder... was Shelly, like your Mark, showing a different face before and now Maressa is seeing the truth? Or had she not worked closely with her yet?
Thanks for all the pointers on dialogue and description! I really appreciate them. The part about Shelly is probably something I failed to modify from the first draft. In my first version of the story, chapter 2 was an entire different mission with Shelly in charge, so Maressa worked closely with her there and it shaped her opinion of her. That has been cut out here; Maressa is supposed to have respect for her out of the hierarchy in the team but gets frustrated with Shelly when Shelly isn't quite as good at battling as Maressa is. I suppose I should have expanded on that a bit more.


“Girl, the way you battle is hot. And I’d know — I’m all about volcanoes!”
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I was a little confused about what his intentions were. Is it just that she’s no longer a threat now that her golduck is down, and therefore he doesn’t care about coming over to gloat? Either way, it feels like he should be focused on other things, so it feels a little off. It might’ve helped to see them interact at a distance leading up to this — some meaningful looks or a laugh across the battlefield? I also share her confusion about his interest in her despite her pokémon... but my hunch is that it’s related to exploring underwater caverns... 👀 (Though it feels a little reductive to count herself out because of her pokemon alone, right? I’d think underlying ideology would be a stronger reason.) Speaking of reasons, I wish he’d added just a tiny bit to his appeal to her: not just “hey you battle good come be my friend instead” but “they don’t appreciate you, do they?” A personal note with some truth to it.

Very curious to see how their next interaction will play out.
Not to spoil too much, but their next interaction does play this part out lol. I concede in that they could've interacted a bit more beforehand haha.


Glad to have a cohort in Aqua/Magma shenanigans here!🌋❤ 💙 🌊
ALWAYS 🤩

Thanks so much for the review! I truly appreciate it ^_^ I'm trying to release a chapter every other week (at least for now lol). Thanks so much for the reviews!
 

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
I had written this many many years ago and by the time my first draft was written I hadn't given much thought to either of these. Both are covered later, but it's helpful to know that they would go better at the beginning of the story instead of later on!
Oh yeah I totally get that — there’s nothing wrong with still enjoying an old fic or with knowing when to leave it alone and let it be what it is. Taking advice for future stories is a great attitude to have about it.

I was also trying to skim down the atmosphere and detail since I went waaaaay overboard on those in the first draft; I guess I should make expand on them a bit more!
I relate deeply to this too haha. Some of my current writing habits definitely include overcompensating for old, bad ones. Like, I constantly have to go back to add internal monologue now, because I used to use too much.

supposed to be Team Aqua testing her obedience,
Ohhhh I gotcha. That does make sense.
 

The Walrein

Vicinal Dragging for the Truth
Partners
  1. gulpin
  2. kricketot
  3. bulbasaur
Hello Starlight Aurate! Thought I'd give this a look for the first anniversary celebration event.

The bandanna was pulled upward as Sarah's pale eyes looked questioningly at her friend.

I feel the passive voice at the beginning ("The bandanna was pulled upwards") combined with describing Sarah's eyes as doing the looking rather than Sarah herself made this read a bit awkwardly.

"Must be why we get along." Taking her hand out of the water, Maressa sighed as she looked at her friend. "Hey... if I tell you something, will you promise to not tell anyone else?"

"Sure. Is it about what the commander had called you in for yesterday?"

Maressa nodded. "I'm not supposed to tell anyone, but I'm sure you won't tell anyone, and well... I don't even know anything about what we're doing."

The three uses of "tell anyone" here felt a little repetitive.

"Come on, everyone knows you're one of the best Pokémon battlers on the team. You've commanded entire squadrons and taken down enemies faster and easier than even some of the oldest members. And when you're just using your own Pokémon, you're still no pushover."

I thought the guard duty position was only given to "the most junior recruits" - this seems inconsistent with Maressa having commanded squadrons before and having been around long enough to earn a reputation as a good battler. Did she get busted down in the ranks at some point?

Pushing herself up the side of the submarirne, Maressa lay next to her friend and gazed skyward into the moonlit night.

Typo with submarirne here.

Opening its pale yellow bill, throaty noises gargled from his mouth as he communicated with Maressa.

A little inconsistency with using its/his to refer to Golduck here.

Turning around, Maressa saw a dark fin protrude from the surface of the water; shaped like a razor, cutting through the air, it came with alarming alacrity towards the vessel.

This feels a little choppy with all the pauses, especially when it's trying to describe an event happening quickly. Maybe change the semicolon to a period and reword the latter part to something like: "Shaped like a razor, it cut through the air towards the vessel with alarming alacrity."

Three hours later, "any minute" became all but a dream. Too afraid to be caught napping, the pair constantly rubbed their eyes and walked around in attempts to get their blood flowing and fend off sleep. Maressa sent out her Pokémon again, only to find them asleep. After another two hours, the sun began to rise, and the duo stood together at one end of the vessel. With hunched shoulders and bagging eyelids, they stared out at the river. Their bloodshot eyes took in the scene of the rising sun spilling its light over the earth, causing the water to look like a thousand diamonds strewn across an orange blanket.

You'd think that they'd have a means to radio in and ask why the relief shift hadn't appeared yet; were they afraid of looking like complainers?

So, I agree with Pen that the opening felt pretty slow here, what with it mostly consisting of the protagonists having vaguely expositional conversation whilst slightly bored. I feel like it might've been more interesting if we had more details about what exactly Team Aqua might've been expecting to find in the undersea craters rather than keeping it coy with a vague reference to "what we're looking for". Or, maybe if we were given an indication to believe that Maressa's mission might not go smoothly. (The part about her being told nothing except the need to obey all orders absolutely is a bit ominous, but it doesn't seem like Maressa has much of a reaction to it). As it is, I'm not really sure where the story's headed from now.

I did like Maressa's interactions with Golduck and Sharpedo, and they aren't typical protagonist Pokemon, which is a nice change.
 
Chapter 4

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
So, I agree with Pen that the opening felt pretty slow here, what with it mostly consisting of the protagonists having vaguely expositional conversation whilst slightly bored. I feel like it might've been more interesting if we had more details about what exactly Team Aqua might've been expecting to find in the undersea craters rather than keeping it coy with a vague reference to "what we're looking for". Or, maybe if we were given an indication to believe that Maressa's mission might not go smoothly. (The part about her being told nothing except the need to obey all orders absolutely is a bit ominous, but it doesn't seem like Maressa has much of a reaction to it). As it is, I'm not really sure where the story's headed from now.

I did like Maressa's interactions with Golduck and Sharpedo, and they aren't typical protagonist Pokemon, which is a nice change.
Hey! Thanks so much for giving the reviews; I really appreciate pointing out the typos and inconsistencies that I never noticed after all these years >_< I see the opening is slow; I'm not sure how else to begin the story and since I'm still working on later parts of the story, trying to rewrite the opening into something totally new is a bit daunting ._. But I really appreciate your advice! Maybe I need to give this a more thorough revamp or scrap this edition and do another rewrite... I'll think of something.

Anyway, here's the new Chapter 4! I hope you enjoy!

Chapter 4



As the submarine descended once more, Maressa couldn’t hold her excitement in any further.

“I’ll be right back!” she said to Marius. He might have called after her—but she was out of that room and blinking in the light of the main cabin once more. Besides, she needed to get away from the multitude of different configurations. She was starting to become more familiar with them, but the thought of soon taking control of them made her sick with anxiety.

Blinking, she walked through the hallways and stopped when she saw a group congregating. A few team members swarmed around a man and his Crawdaunt. The Team Aqua member had brown hair kept back in a scruffy ponytail and removed his sunglasses to rub his eyes.

“Sean! Nice to see you back,” Mickey said as he pushed aside teammates to get through. “How did everything go? Successful mission, I hope? Got the creation fluid?”

Sean lowered his eyes. “No, I didn’t get the creation fluid.”

The tension in the air was palpable. In the ensuing silence, the hum of the submarine’s engine was the only noise (though it was still quite a powerful noise). All stared at Sean expectantly.

“Okay,” Mickey said with forced patience, “and why is that?”

“I had gotten hold of it while undercover at Devon Corp—but the guy in charge, Mr. Stone, didn’t recognize me and started hounding my steps. I was stopped by a couple of kids and their Pokemon. I got away—but without the creation fluid.”

“Did you cover your tracks?” The joy had evaporated from Mickey’s face—his eyes were wide and he looked almost scared.

“… No, but I know they’re not following us.”

“And why didn’t you cover your tracks?”

“I barely got away, as it was!”

Mickey gaped at Sean, piercing him with his emerald glare. “Why? What happened? You know you’re supposed to kept undercover and avoid attention as much as possible—we don’t need all of the Rustboro police on our tail!”

Maressa’s head flew back and forth as she watched the two men converse. Her mind was abuzz with questions—and she wasn’t good at holding them back.

“‘Cover your tracks?’ What do you mean? And what are we using this creation fluid for, anyway? What fossils do we have that we need to revive?”

Heads turned to look at her but she didn’t care. How was she supposed to know what all this terminology meant? Mickey’s sour mood disappeared as he smiled.

“How about you come with me and I’ll teach you? Sean, you come along, too. The rest of you, back to work!”

The other Team Aqua members scattered like a bunch of Ariados as Mickey, Maressa and Sean made their way through the halls, passing portholes showcasing pale blue waters. As they walked, Maressa noticed Sean kept his eyes down and held a distinct air of discomfort.

Mickey unlocked a door and the three of them were in a tiny room with a very low ceiling. Desks barely large enough to hold notebooks sat against two walls, each with a tiny seat.

“So, welcome to my office!” Mickey said cheerfully. “You can have this cramped seat or that cramped seat or sit in that particularly cold spot on the floor.”

Maressa opted for one of the cramped seats—she hated the cold—and the three of them were in a little circle.

“Now, to answer your questions!” Mickey said with shining eyes. “We might not have fossils that need reviving—but that doesn’t mean the creation fluid can’t teach us about the origins of the earth!”

“Okay, but how does learning about the origins of earth help us?” she asked impatiently.

“All life begins in the sea—all life depends on the sea, even if it’s something terrestrial. You have the potential to become a high-ranking member in Team Aqua, so it’s very important that you know this—”

“Oh, yeah, I don’t doubt the importance of what we do! I was just wondering how discovering origins is going to help us with what’s going on now.”

“There are so many ways! The earliest oceans were even less habitable than they are now—they were pure acid, maybe didn’t even have oxygen, and yet life still persisted and thrived. If we can learn about how life continued under those conditions, imagine what we can do with that knowledge today! With our oceans deteriorating, learning this information is more crucial than ever.”

Puzzle pieces clicked into place as Maressa listened to Mickey. She smiled.

“So,” Mickey went on, “that is why we want to look at the creation fluid, and that is why we’re looking at the ruins by Dewford.”

… And the puzzle pieces fell apart again into a senseless jigsaw in Maressa’s mind.

“Ruins? You mean like man-made ruins?”

“Yes! Dewford was colonised by people long ago—”

“But how does studying something man-made teach us about the origin of life?”

“Because,” Mickey said with flare, “ancient people discovered how to live from the ocean sustainably without damaging it or polluting the waters. If they learned how to do it, so can we! They respected and worshipped the ocean and its gods. We can learn a lot by looking at them.

“Anyway,” he said as he stood up—bending his back slightly so as to not hit his head on the ceiling, “Maressa, now that you know what our next step is, I want you to rest with Squad C. You all will be taking diving gear and exploring the ruins. Make sure your Pokemon are ready, too. Sean, I want to talk to you a bit more.”

Marerssa did as she was told and exited Mickey’s office, traversing the winding halls until eventually finding her way to the row of rooms where the grunts stayed. She pulled the keys Mark had given her out of her pocket and went to the room assigned to her.

It was even tinier than Mickey’s office. The ceiling was low—she cursed her height—and she had to bend down. There was a cot, a small desk, and enough unoccupied space only to stand.

Untying her bandanna, Maressa draped it over the tiny square that constituted a desk and peeled her gloves off her hands. She lay down and exhaled deeply, feeling her vertebrae stretch as the weight was removed from them. Without people constantly talking to her, the excitement wore away and weariness seeped into her bones—but her mind buzzed with questions.

She trusted that there were good reasons for everything Team Aqua did; she just wished she could know what they all were. Sean didn’t have the creation fluid, and it sounded like it would only become more difficult to obtain—and judging that he hadn’t “covered his tracks,” it sounded like the police might be on their tail.

As Maressa closed her eyes and drifted off, she looked forward to diving with her Pokemon. In her mind’s eye, she saw a city of forgotten ruins wreathed in seagrass lying kilometers below the ocean surface. In the beautiful seascape of her mind, she drifted off into an easy sleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sunlight filtered through the surface of the water and sparkled on the wave tops as the Team Aqua grunts descended. The submarine floated at the surface, minuscule in comparison to the infinite open ocean around them. The large columns of rock reached out from the seafloor like fingers of the earth. As though attempting to escape the cold seawater and feel the warm sun, they formed avenues in the great sea. The sides of the pinnacles were lush with multitudes of coral and sedentary organisms arrayed in a rainbow of colors. Numerous Pokémon nosed their way about in search of food or else floated by idly as the current carried them wherever it willed.

Bubbles floated upwards as Maressa breathed out through her regulator. Clenching Seaking’s tail with one hand, she gazed at the scenery around them. Though she was to search for ruins or a cave opening like Mark had told her to, she couldn’t help but be mystified at the natural beauty of the tropical ocean. Her fingers relaxed as she let go of Seaking’s tail and began the descent by herself, allowing her aquatic companion to scout ahead of her.

The water beneath her was an impenetrable blue—she couldn’t see how far away the bottom might have been. Maressa switched her gaze from the aquatic life to her companions nearby her. Sharpedo and Lanturn swam close by; several other grunts had Pokemon with them, as well. Some of the other divers were within a few meters, each wearing the same grey-blue wetsuit.

Having her Pokemon nearby made Maressa feel secure; though she had been diving for years, the wide expanse of the ocean was always a bit daunting—every current and rock of the waves made her realize how small and utterly helpless she was against the sea's infinite power. With her Pokemon, at least, she knew they could help her out in case anything went wrong.

She couldn't stop thinking about her exchange with Mickey earlier. Even though she was always eager to go diving and exploring underwater formations, studying the ruins just seemed odd to her. Maybe he was right—maybe they could discover something about the ocean that they wouldn't otherwise know?

As she and Seaking descended into the sea, her heart leapt at the sight of shadowy outlines arise before her eyes. Seaking swam ahead of her and she saw his fishy orange form swim in-and-out of stone columns. As Maressa continued to descend, she soon found herself hovering over a rocky bottom in the midst of an ancient city. Spires and scaffolds of forgotten stone buildings stood around her, wreathed with seaweed red and brown. Corals and algae crowned the lopsided archways; seagrasses and kelp clung to the crumbling rock, their blades swaying in the current's gentle ebb and flow. Maressa hovered in the water, unable to do more than stare at the lost city she found herself in.

She watched a few Corphish crawl in large, oddly-shaped cracks on a stone wall. Blinking her eyes, she realized they weren't just cracks—they weren't cracks at all. They formed words:

"i guinaiya-ku. i minetgot-hu yan i fuetså-ku i tåsi"

Unclipping a camera from her dive jacket, she snapped a picture of the cryptic writing.

BOOP-BOOP BOOP-BOOP

Maressa jumped as the transmitter on her shoulder flashed bright red and released a series of beeps. Her heart raced—if the team on the submarine was sending her a signal, then she needed to get back to the sub as quickly as possible. What was so serious that they were cutting the mission short for?

Maressa looked up as an orange form tore through the water towards her.

"King! Seaking!"

With her regulator in her mouth, Marerssa couldn't say anything—but Seaking perfectly got his message across. He flapped his fins urgently, dancing back-and-forth in the water. There was something dangerous nearby!

Maressa's heart churned as her blood raced. If danger was that close, then all she could do was get back to the sub. Raising the control of her dive jacket, she pressed the button, pumping air into it. Kicking her finned feet, she slowly ascended through the water column. It took all her willpower to continue upwards at a slow, steady pace.

Go slower than the smallest bubble, she had always been told.

As she breathed out through her regulator, she watched her bubbles fly to the surface above her, keeping her pace slow and steady to prevent nitrogen buildup in her body.

Eventually, she saw the sunlight break through the endless blue and sparkle beyond the void. Her head broke the water surface; she exchanged her regulator for her snorkel before paddling her way to the submarine nearby. Mickey and a few others stood on top of the dark blue cylinder, looking at something behind Maressa.

"Mickey!" she called as she removed her snorkel. "What's up?"

He pointed; Maressa turned around and her heart sank.

A massive dark red ship crept towards to them. It easily dwarfed Team Aqua's submarine—it even seemed to have a loading port that was big enough to take them inside. Along its side was a black "M" resembling a cave nestled in a trio of mountains.

Other Team Aqua grunts joined Maressa at the surface. One of them whistled with awe as he laid eyes on the massive ship. Something nuzzled Maressa's shoulder—she put an arm over Lanturn's back and nodded to Sharpedo as the two of them joined her and Seaking.

Maressa looked back at Mickey, intending to ask him a question when she noticed a bright green form glide through the air.

"Is that a Tropius?"

Mickey wheeled around and immediately laid eyes on the reptilian creature flying around them.

"That's one of theirs! Shoot it down, shoot it down, shoot it down!"

Several jets of water—and an aurora beam from a Sealeo—all flew through the air towards the Tropius. The Grass-type ducked and wove, flying out of the attacks' range. It joined a flock of Swellow, which Maressa quickly noticed was joined by several Golbat that seemingly came from nowhere.

"Everyone inside, inside, inside!" Mickey urged.

Maressa and the others awkwardly clambered onto the submarine top. As she bent down to unbuckle her fins, a Xatu swooped down, soaring just over the waters, its scarlet eyes locked onto her.

Maressa crouched, her muscles tense, ready to dive aside at the last minute—but Lanturn leapt out of the water, slamming into the Xatu and delivering an electric shock to it. The Psychic-type flapped its wings wildly as it tried to right itself, sending a blast of psychic energy at Maressa’s Pokemon. Unaffected, Sharpedo leapt from the water and crunched down on the Xatu's wing, taking the Pokemon to the depths.

There was a splash—Xatu’s psychic attack had hit Mickey off the sub and into the water. Her teammates swam over to him, helping him back on deck.

Maressa looked up. The blood in her veins turned to ice as she saw hundreds of Pokemon soaring in the air above them: Swellow and Golbat formed a cloud, joined by an occasional Xatu, Skarmory and Tropius. Maressa spotted a few rarer individuals, including a Flygon and a Metang, along with more exotic Pokemon like Jumpluff and Pidgeot.

She squinted—the Metang hung in the air not very far above the deck of Team Magma's ship, just enough to make for a good vantage point. Someone sat on top of it. Her eyes roved to the ship’s deck, where several humans wearing dark grey pants and red hoodies stood with an assortment of Pokemon. A sprightly individual with a mushroom-domed head bounced along the deck, belching out seeds at the Pokemon in the water.

Her attention was torn as she saw a cloud of Swellow group together and divebomb the Team Aqua members. Adrenaline coursed through her veins as she saw the Flying-types descend—

"Everyone, down!"

The Team Aqua grunts dropped to the floor of the submarine as the Swellow flew just over them. Several Swellow were knocked out of the air as Pokemon in the water targeted them with various attacks. Maressa looked over at Mickey. Her dive tank was still attached to her and its weight pressed down heavily onto her with massive discomfort bordering on pain.

"What do we do now?"

"We can't fight them!"

"Why not? We have the terrain advantage! And we don't need to win, we just need to incapacitate enough of their Pokemon. Birds can't fly if their wings are wet—it won't be hard!"

Mickey grit his teeth as his eyes darted at the chaos unraveling before their eyes: more Team Aqua Pokemon were fighting back, leaping from the air to snag Flying-types in their jaws or tentacles. Some were beat down as Team Magma's Pokemon lashed out with wings, beaks, and claws.

"Fine!" he exclaimed at last. "Go ahead and command them—we need to make this quick!"

"You got it! Seaking, get over here! I need you!"

Maressa crawled across the surface of the submarine, put her snorkel in her mouth, and splashed back into the water. In a few seconds, Seaking's orange form appeared below her and Maressa sat on his back as he plowed through the seawater, away from the submarine and into the thick of battle.

Her eyes scanned the battlefield—it was a mess. The Pokemon above were frequently shot down but they always reformed, combining their attacks to create powerful gusts of wind or to attack a single Pokemon as a unit.

She gripped Seaking’s back with her legs as he plowed through the twisting, turning waters. Behind her mask, Maressa’s eyes stayed trained on the Pokemon in the air above her. Now that she was closer, she saw a few Team Magma members sitting astride the larger Pokemon: a Flygon ducked in and out of the sunlit patches while his rider gave him commands. Someone clung to the back of the Tropius. And above them all, Maressa saw a Metang floating near the ship, a lone Team Magma member sitting on him, calling out indeterminate orders and pointing to different areas.

Squeezing Seaking with her knees, she tapped him a few times and leaned to the left. Seaking followed her directions and rose out of the water to give her a clearer view. Sharpedo and Lanturn followed them, and her little party retreated to a calmer part of the waters. Removing her snorkel from her mouth, she gave out orders.

“We need to get them out of the sky. Flying-types can’t stay airborne with wet wings! The water Pokemon need to group together and combine attacks. Act as a unit. If they fly out of range, hide below the water. They can’t hit us down there. Sharpedo and Lanturn, regroup and direct those hiding under the waves. Seaking, let’s round up and direct everyone at the surface. Go!”

Sharpedo and Lanturn immediately dove beneath the waters while Seaking swam forward to the multitude of Tentacool, Tentacruel, Seadra and Wailmer sitting at the surface. Maressa called out orders—as Lanturn and Sharpedo herded other Pokemon, they gradually rose to the surface as well.

“Everyone, surf!”

Maressa exchanged her snorkel with her regulator as all Pokemon dove beneath the waves. They hydrokinetically controlled the water immediately around them, gathering, raising and building it up until it turned into a massive tidal wave that towered in the air.

Maressa clung to Seaking’s fins as the wall of water soared—her stomach somersaulted as she felt the wave’s powerful pull take her into the sky, launching all the Pokemon into the air—trapping the Flying-types in its deadly liquid net and crashing back down with thunderous force. Clinging to Seaking, Maressa’s body was still overtaken in the rush of adrenaline. A cloud of white bubbles filled the water, blinding her for a few seconds and blotting out her vision. Maressa reminded herself to keep breathing—or else in the excitement, she would have held her breath, and that would not bode well when attached to pressurized air.

As the bubbles rose to the surface and the sea waters calmed, Maressa and Seaking hung under the water. Her heart twisted—

Flying-types floated about erratically in the sea, helpless in the currents, desperately beating their wings in vain attempts to get air again. Some succeeded in breaking the surface of the salty waters. Others floundered about, ensnared in the ocean’s deadly embrace.

Smacking Seaking’s side, she pointed to the Flying-types stuck under the water. He darted forward; he and Maressa gathered who they could and brought them to the surface.

Cold wind slapped her face as her head broke the surface. She quickly exchanged her regulator for her snorkel. Her eyes fell on the Flying-types who had not been taken down by the wave—and there were a lot—beat their wings rapidly, creating a giant gust of wind. As Maressa clambered back onto Seaking, she noticed a Skarmory glowing brightly, cutting through the air like a razor.

"Lanturn, do what you can to stop them!"

Lanturn charged forward, her light sparkling with electricity. She leapt out of the air, releasing a bolt of lightning that hit several Flying-types, sending them to the waves below. She kept at it: leaping in the air, shocking Pokemon, and diving back down to the waters—all while the Skarmory drew nearer.

She leapt in the air—as her blue body crackled with electricity, a Flygon swooped in and smacked her with its tail, sending her flying through the air.

"LANTURN!"

Maressa knew Lanturn wouldn't be taken out by a single attack from a Flygon, but instinct drove her to check on her Pokemon. She was cut off as a green beam cut through the air and sliced through the salt water, penetrating meters deep beneath the waves.

Breloom danced about on deck, collecting energy into a glowing ball.

“Sharpedo, see that? Think you can launch yourself up there to stop him?”

Sharpedo growled—he could make the distance, for sure, but once he was on a dry deck, he couldn’t do more than flop about uselessly!

“Then launch me!”

Maressa dismounted Seaking and was soon astride Sharpedo—she had never before been so grateful that her wetsuit was built to endure serrated scales. Her amber eyes stayed locked on Breloom.

“Ready when you are!”

Lowering his head, Sharpedo plowed forward—racing faster and faster like a bullet—shooting through the water with increasing speed. The wind whipped and slapped Maressa’s face—her heart raced as she bent low over Sharpedo.

Sharpedo dipped down—then shot into the air with the force of a torpedo. Maressa clung to his back, her stomach churning, all eyes on them as they arced towards the deck of Team Magma’s ship.

“Bre—LAAAAAAAA!”

Breloom shrieked bloody murder as he saw Sharpedo flying towards him. He scrambled—

Team Magma members scattered as Sharpedo crashed onto the desk, his caudal fin cutting through the sheet metal like a knife through butter. Momentum carried Maressa forward—she flew off his back and straight into Breloom.

“BREEEEEEE!”

He screamed as Maressa crashed into him—the weight of her dive tank pinning him down. He flailed about, screaming in utter terror—letting out strange, chirping chokes that almost sounded like crying.

Someone lifted Maressa off Breloom—and then water sprayed all over the deck and the unseen force let go of her. She wheeled about—

Several Team Magma members stared at her with a mixture of confusion and anger. Sharpedo lay just before her, growling and spitting bursts of water to keep the enemies at bay.

She glanced up—several Flying types flew about in a circle, whipping up gusts. The ship suddenly dipped forward—Team Aqua’s Pokemon used surf again, creating a giant wall of water that trapped several of Team Magma’s Pokemon. The heads of Team Magma members turned away from her—she used the opportunity to try and push Sharpedo off deck and into the water. But Sharpedo was huge, and she had to walk backwards while wearing her fins. As she pushed her back against Sharpedo, adrenaline and panic raced through her—and her eyes locked on Breloom’s, who huddled in a shivering heap before her.

Once his eyes met hers, they narrowed and he sprang forward with a cry:

“Bre—LOOOM!”

He twisted—his powerful tail smacked Sharpedo upside the snout, sending him flying through the air—

And back into the water!

“Thank you!” Maressa called to Breloom before putting in her regulator, taking a few steps and falling back to the waves.

Several meters deep under water, Maressa saw more Flying-types than ever. Her heart twisted—but maybe this wasn’t a bad thing. If enough Pokemon were down, Team Aqua could retreat while Team Magma collected their Pokemon.

Her vision erupted—a green beam cut through the water—an orange form spun above her—

Seaking!

Seeing him hit by a solar beam erased all other thoughts from her mind—she swam up as quickly as she could, kicking hard, a trail of bubbles streaming behind her. She had to make sure Seaking was okay!

Several other water Pokemon congregated—Maressa felt the water pull as Team Aqua’s Pokemon readied another surf attack.

Sher head broke the surface—she saw Seaking floating, his eyes barely open.

“Seaking, I’m here! Are you—”

She was cut off by an agonized roar—a Skarmory had slammed into Sharpedo, slicing his scaly flesh with razor-sharp blades.

Sharpedo, no!

Maressa’s eyes were so trained on Seaking and Sharpedo that she failed to notice two bright beams fly in from the direction of Team Magma’s ship—

An immense force slammed into her, pushing her and Seaking below the water with breakneck force. Bubbles hailed from behind her neck as something hard slammed into the back of her head—she was constantly propelled downwards. Maressa switched her snorkel for her regulator and inhaled—water flooded her facial cavity, filling it with stinging salt.

There was no air.

Her body was pulled down quicker and quicker. He ears screamed from the weight of pressure. Panic flooded her heart—her hand flew behind her—

The gasket was damaged. All the air expelled from the top of the diving tank. The weight of the tank—and force of the air—pulled her body lower and lower—

She automatically unbuckled her dive jacket, freeing herself. Her lungs screamed with pain—free from the tank, she kicked as hard as she could. The water was dark around her—the surface seemed so far away—her lungs were fit to burst—she needed air. The sunlight grew closer, the water blindingly bright as it shone beneath the rays.

Her head broke the surface—before she could take in a breath, a wave crashed over her head and she was sent tumbling. The force of the water beat her back-and-forth, playing with her as if she was a rag doll. She tried to right herself—tried to orient herself—tried to find the surface, the sun, the air

But the water pulled her under, a current sucking her lower and lower into the ocean’s omniscient grasp. She spasmed, twisting and turning—her lungs burst—her ears rang from the pressure—

She inhaled—water flooded her—her chest convulsed, as if she were trying to vomit—pain flooded her body, her torso pricked with hundreds of sharp knives. Her vision spotted—everything erupted around her—

All she knew was the dark, the liquid, the suffocation.
 
Last edited:

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
Oh that took a direction I didn't expect! I'm excited to see Maressa in physical peril in a way that can't be simply fixed with pokemon. I am wondering where her other pokemon are, but I'm curious to see how she'll handle this situation on her own.

Some other thoughts:

Maressa's eyes fluttered open. "Well, this is Hoenn..."
Hahaha. Hoenn's hot these days, what can we say.

"Sarah… I had to… I had to attack someone."
It was nice to see her have a moment to unpack this experience and explore those doubts -- it's clearly still bothering her. I sort of wish Sarah would've resisted her story more somehow, either refusing to believe that their team could be so rough or telling her to suck it up and remember why she was there.

"They're re-grouping some of the members. There's a mission planned, and some of the people in our squads are switching positions."
I do appreciate how much of the work required of them seems to be...well, grunt work. That's why they don't really know what's happening, and it shows how little they're valued.

the friendship between the three of them continued to grow.
I'm wondering what this looks like! Are they the kinds of friends who mostly gossip while they're on watch? Do they hang out and do non-Team Aqua things together like ice cream or the cinema? I feel like this friend could be used more to either serve as a reason Maressa still feels dedicated to Team Aqua in spite of everything or to cast further doubt on their activities and make her feel the strain. Right now Chloe isn't quite doing either of those things for me.

Part of the reason she joined Team Aqua was the opportunity to work with her Pokémon
Nice to get another tiny glimpse at why she's here. I still want more! Did she try other more... traditional venues, and it didn't work out? Or are there other reasons?

Sunlight filtered through the surface of the water, sparkling on the wave tops as Maressa and her teammates descended. The submarine floated at the surface, minuscule in comparison to the infinite open ocean around them.
Oh! I was surprised we didn't get the conversation with Shelly. Again, it seems like another way to start ramping up the pressure on Maressa, make her sweat over her involvement in this.

Each took care not to let himself touch the rocks for fear of harming any fragile organisms he came in contact with.
Loved this detail. In spite of Aqua's occasional failure to make good on taking care of pokemon, they do care and are making efforts to try.

explaining to her what he saw.
How are they communicating, exactly? Any spoken language is just going to come out as unintelligible bubbles underwater.

"GO!" before shoving her down the hatch.
I had trouble picturing what was going on with the Aqua submarine here. Is it fully underwater, or just sitting on the water, or underwater at first and then it surfaces?

green dome-like mushroom.
Breloom! My favorite.

"You have to listen to me! Just do what I say, and don't question it!"
This was kinda odd to see after all the hype around her battling ability and how well she handled other pokemon last chapter. Considering how much we've seen pokemon in Aqua trade hands or be borrowed for this and that mission, it's s surprise that their pokemon are so slow to follow the commands of another Aqua member.

Maressa turned to her teammates.

"When I tell the Pokémon to all go underwater, I need everyone to cover their ears. Seaking is going to use supersonic. Understand?"
I was confused whether these were human or pokemon teammates. If human, why don't they have more of a presence? How are they helping, or what are they doing? If pokemon, how are they covering their ears?

flew around in chaos.
Because you described it as chaos earlier when they're dodging sludge, the effect is lessened here.

Landing with a heavy splash, she frantically grabbed her regulator and stuffed it into her mouth.
This read to me a little like she's already underwater when she's putting it in her mouth, which seems...dubious. I'm also wondering why it isn't more of a mask covering her nose and mouth? IDK, I don't have experience with diving equipment. But it made me pause and wonder. Similarly, when she come back up, it seemed premature to me to take it back out of her mouth.

Hanging onto Seaking, she patted his head and tried to calm him down while she reached for her Pokéball.

“Seaking—Seaking—it’s okay! Calm down—I promise—this won’t last—Seaking, I’m here—Seaking—!”
Huh. I had mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I was surprised a pokemon that's used to battling was so easily thrown off by a leech seed and that she didn't recall it more quickly when it freaked out. But, I liked seeing her face a consequence here -- a pretty serious one.

her fingers only fumbled about uselessly as the metal dragged her further down
Dragged doesn't feel quite right. It seems to me more that the air pressure would be driving or pushing her forward -- and down if she'd pointed that way.

Nice to see another update from you!
 
Last edited:

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
It was nice to see her have a moment to unpack this experience and explore those doubts -- it's clearly still bothering her. I sort of wish Sarah would've resisted her story more somehow, either refusing to believe that their team could be so rough or telling her to suck it up and remember why she was there.

I'm wondering what this looks like! Are they the kinds of friends who mostly gossip while they're on watch? Do they hang out and do non-Team Aqua things together like ice cream or the cinema? I feel like this friend could be used more to either serve as a reason Maressa still feels dedicated to Team Aqua in spite of everything or to cast further doubt on their activities and make her feel the strain. Right now Chloe isn't quite doing either of those things for me.
Both fair points! I am definitely in favor of "showing, not telling" and as I had tendencies to go overboard on that I tried to dial it back. Here, I did more of the telling because I honestly wanted to get into the meat of the story where things happen. I've had different opinions on whether the first chapter was a good start or a slow one (and more people here have said the latter, which I agree with) and I feel like taking more time to dwell on relationships would lag the story behind. But I appreciate the feedback! If interactions between them would be worth showing more, then I could definitely do that.

Nice to get another tiny glimpse at why she's here. I still want more! Did she try other more... traditional venues, and it didn't work out? Or are there other reasons?
Eh, both. She goes into more detail in a chapter soon.

Oh! I was surprised we didn't get the conversation with Shelly. Again, it seems like another way to start ramping up the pressure on Maressa, make her sweat over her involvement in this.
Haha yeeaaahhhh I was avoiding writing a scene I didn't want to. My original draft of the story had a chapter where Shelly explains a plan... And I wrote it out so convoluted that it just made things more difficult to follow. So going forward I decided to just nix those scenes and get to the action (not realizing that my action scenes left/leave a LOT to be desired >_>) and I wasn't sure how much it would be needed when I revised it. I felt like the chapter was long enough and had enough substance as it was, so I decided to leave it out.

But I'm grateful for the feedback! Knowing that more character interaction on display is definitely a good thing I want to keep in mind going forward. Thank you so much!


How are they communicating, exactly? Any spoken language is just going to come out as unintelligible bubbles underwater.
Ahhhfksjdsklf I have a head canon that Pokemon trainers can understand what their Pokemon say and forget it's not actual canon and end up not explaining it >_> The idea was supposed to be that Seaking can speak underwater and Maressa just makes motions for him to continue or to explain. But I guess that should have had more explicit explanation lol

[quote[I had trouble picturing what was going on with the Aqua submarine here. Is it fully underwater, or just sitting on the water, or underwater at first and then it surfaces?[/quote]
Oh, sitting at the surface, like this.

This was kinda odd to see after all the hype around her battling ability and how well she handled other pokemon last chapter. Considering how much we've seen pokemon in Aqua trade hands or be borrowed for this and that mission, it's s surprise that their pokemon are so slow to follow the commands of another Aqua member.
Point taken. Thank you!

This read to me a little like she's already underwater when she's putting it in her mouth, which seems...dubious. I'm also wondering why it isn't more of a mask covering her nose and mouth? IDK, I don't have experience with diving equipment. But it made me pause and wonder. Similarly, when she come back up, it seemed premature to me to take it back out of her mouth.
lol if you want me to talk about diving:

You can definitely put your regulator in when your underwater. You expel the water from your mouth into your regulator and it expels it back into the ocean. I haven't gone on a ton of dives but I am certified and have been out a few times. She took it out of her mouth so she could talk to Seaking.

Huh. I had mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I was surprised a pokemon that's used to battling was so easily thrown off by a leech seed and that she didn't recall it more quickly when it freaked out. But, I liked seeing her face a consequence here -- a pretty serious one.
Idk, I just wrote it a bit overdramatic I guess? Would it be better for it to be less so? And her Pokeball fell into the water.

Nice to see another update from you!
Thank YOU for leaving another review! :)
 

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
Haha yeeaaahhhh I was avoiding writing a scene I didn't want to. My original draft of the story had a chapter where Shelly explains a plan... And I wrote it out so convoluted that it just made things more difficult to follow. So going forward I decided to just nix those scenes and get to the action (not realizing that my action scenes left/leave a LOT to be desired >_>) and I wasn't sure how much it would be needed when I revised it. I felt like the chapter was long enough and had enough substance as it was, so I decided to leave it out.
Yeah, there's definitely something to be said for skipping to the parts you're excited about. If You're not feeling it, likely the reader isn't either. In this case, I was surprised not to see at least part of it though.

lol if you want me to talk about diving:

You can definitely put your regulator in when your underwater. You expel the water from your mouth into your regulator and it expels it back into the ocean. I haven't gone on a ton of dives but I am certified and have been out a few times. She took it out of her mouth so she could talk to Seaking.
Yeah, I've been on zero dives, so I clearly have no idea what I'm talking about, hahaha. I'll have you come talk to you before I write my diviner's scenes. (A million years from now, at this rate, but oh well.)

Idk, I just wrote it a bit overdramatic I guess? Would it be better for it to be less so? And her Pokeball fell into the water.
I'd if overdramatic is the word so much as... How do you want to characterize the seaking? How many battles has it fought in with Maressa? And, oh, gotcha--I missed the pokeball falling into the water, but that makes sense.

 
Chapter 5

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
Woops, a quick thing I want to reply to that I didn't get to before:
I'd if overdramatic is the word so much as... How do you want to characterize the seaking? How many battles has it fought in with Maressa?
Fair enough! Another case of me not characterizing the Pokemon enough before delving into the plot. Her Seaking is much more timid and easily distressed than her other Pokemon. Her Pokemon all have backstories, but it isn't something I even noted before going in with the story. Maybe I should have expanded on them more, first. Thanks for the feedback!

Here's Chapter 5! I hope you enjoy, and any thoughts or critiques are always appreciated!

Chapter 5



Searing pain shot through Maressa’s chest—seawater squeezed out through her mouth. Her throat burned as if it were on fire and felt sandy. Her vision spun around—she couldn’t focus—it was hard to breathe—it never seemed enough…

Her lungs suddenly filled with air. It flowed in, refreshing, filling the space and clearing he mind. She opened her eyes, blinking several times to clear them of seawater—something was clamped down over her mouth and nose. Someone—she couldn’t register who—peered closely at her, his purple hair sticking to his face, watching her chest rise and fall as she took in oxygen.

Her limbs were so heavy. Her chest hurt immensely—the air was a relief, but pain surged through her torso with every breath she took. She heard people hustle about—shouting orders—running back and forth. She closed her eyes—it was too hard to keep them open, too difficult to stay awake…

Over all this, a soft voice spoke gently into her ear as she drifted off once more.

“You’ll be okay, we’ve got you. You’re going to be fine. Don’t worry.”

+++++++++++++++++++++

The blackness rose up to meet her, ready to swallow her whole.

Everything was warm, soft, peaceful…

Her body dragged further and further into the deep, unable to rise to the surface.


She inhaled deeply, exhaling again softly…

And as she stared into the abyss, the abyss stared into her.


Maressa’s eyelids fluttered open—the horrible image of the blackness of the ocean depths still imprinted on her mind, making her feel incredibly small and powerless. She nestled her face deeper into the pillows—

Pillows?

She looked around. She lay in a white bed, wearing a large shirt and loose shorts. More beds like her own filled the small area. There was a corner ahead of her, blocking the rest of the room from her view. A closed door was immediately next to her bed and she saw another door on a wall to the far left.

Inhaling deeply, Maressa closed her eyes. It was awful—the crushing pressure, the surrounding darkness, the flooding waters—it was all so awful.

But she was alive. And, by the look of things, she was well.

She dimly wondered where everyone was—where her Pokemon were, how the mission went—but for the moment, she was content to simply lay in bed. Her body felt too heavy to get back up and into action right away—and she was so thirsty. Her stomach rumbled with hunger as she lay there, staring at the blank metal ceiling.

Closing her eyes, she drifted into a half-sleep. She was tired, but for the most part, felt totally fine.

Her eyes opened as she heard a door creak and saw a man wearing white scrubs enter from the far left. He looked about her own age—perhaps in his mid-twenties—and smiled when he saw her.

“You’re awake! That’s great. How are you feeling?”

Maressa sighed. “Really tired…”

He walked over to Maressa’s bedside, still smiling. “I bet—getting directly hit with a Pokemon attack and being so deep underwater—that’s not easy to bounce back from! You’re doing really well overall, though. We got you emergency oxygen right away, so it doesn’t look like any damage done to major tissues or organs, at least not yet. We’ll need to monitor you for a few days, though; a lot of diving-related injuries aren’t immediate.”

Maressa raised her head slightly. “A few DAYS?"

The medic nodded.

“But that’s just a check-up, right? I’ll be able to go out and do everything normally like before—right?”

He shook his head. “Definitely not. You were down really deep before we got you—and sometimes the bends can show up after more than a day. If you’ve got nitrogen bubbling in your blood, we need to know and get it out immediately. You don’t want to be walking around and suddenly not be able to move. And you really need to rest. So, you might as well stay here.”

Maressa’s head dropped back to the pillows and she groaned.

She could not lie in bed for more than a day—definitely not for days on end. She wanted to see her Pokemon! And three of them couldn’t visit her—she needed to go outside and be in the water with them.

“Don’t worry—you’re in good hands,” the medic told her. “We’ll make sure you get back on your feet before long.”

She closed her eyes, unable to think of anything nice to say. She heard the door open as the medic walked into the hallway, his voice filtering in.

“She’s okay, so far… You shouldn’t go in, I don’t want her to go in shock… Give me at least until tomorrow… There’s enough going on already… Adding to it won’t help at this point…”

Footsteps, then the door closed and the medic was with her once more.

“When can I see my Pokemon?” she asked him.

His brown eyes looked curiously at her and he sighed. “I don’t know.”

Maressa grimaced. That was not the answer she wanted to hear.

“Well… Do you know how everything went?”

He cocked an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“The mission! By the time I passed out, I was on the losing end of a battle with that Magma commander. Did my Pokemon make it out okay? And everyone else?”

The man’s mouth parted slightly—he looked apprehensive.

“Okay, so, before I tell you… What exactly happened to you?”

Maressa closed her eyes, thinking back to what happened—suppressing a shudder as she remembered the seawater flooding her mouth, pulling her down…

“I dove into the water, far below the surface… I was close to that Team Magma ship, and there were tons of Swellow and Golbat in the air. A few Team Magma members rode on Flying-type Pokemon, too. My Seaking was hit by a solar beam and I saw a Skarmory crash into my Sharpedo… Something bright hit me—I think it was another solar beam… It pushed me further down and knocked the valve off of my dive tank—I couldn’t breathe anymore. I took my dive jacket off and swam back to the surface—but waves kept hitting me, and I was just pulled underwater—I couldn’t swim back up…”

Her insides churned as she remembered being filled with salt water, being pulled further and further into the deep, cut off from all air—from all life…

“I see,” the medic said thoughtfully. “You definitely took a beating—you should stay off your feet and rest for a bit.”

“And how is everything else?!” Maressa blurted out. “I at least gotta know what’s going on outside of here!”

The medic looked critically at her. “I can tell you what happened, but you need to not panic. Can you promise me that? Promise me that you’ll keep calm?”

Maressa took in a deep breath. She didn’t want to stay calm—she didn’t want to be lying in bed at all!—but if he said that panicking would only make things worse, then she would avoid it.

“Yes,” she resolutely. “I’ll stay calm.”

“This is a Team Magma base.”

“WHAT?!”

Maressa’s heart jumped to her throat—she pushed herself to a sitting position. Her blood raced—fear coursed through her veins. The medic no longer looked friendly—now that she knew who he worked with, he looked just as ugly and evil as the rest of Team Magma.

He frowned. “You told me you would keep calm.”

“I didn’t know you were with Team Magma!”

She swung her legs out of bed, all exhaustion and pain washed away with the flow of adrenaline. She stood—and found herself face-to-face with the Team Magma medic.

“You need to keep off your feet,” he said sternly.

She struck her heel into his ankle. He gasped and fell to his side—she reached for the door handle, but a hand clamped around her upper arm.

The medic was still on his feet—and apparently unhurt by Maressa’s attack. Before she could strike again, he twisted her arm—only to immobilize and not to cause pain—and pushed her against the wall.

Her heart beat frantically. She pushed—but was far too weak to fight against him. She thought she might cry—panic flooded her, filled her, she needed to get out!

“I’m not going to hurt you.”

She turned her head. The medic looked at her—there was no malice or smugness. His gaze was still critical. He almost looked reluctant.

“No one will touch you here—you’re safe. Panicking and moving about is going to hurt you more than anything else. We don’t know the extent of damage your body has undergone, and you really need to take it easy.”

“Why are you doing this?” she shouted. “Why are you hanging on to me? To interrogate me? To torture me later?”

“We wouldn’t do that! We wouldn’t bother to take care of you and heal you if we were just going to hurt you later on. We’ve already given you care—this stuff isn’t cheap, you know. Especially if you end up going in the decompression chamber.”

The mention of the decompression chamber made Maressa’s heart churn. He was right: she didn’t know the extent of damage, and it could very well be serious. And if they were already treating her, then they wouldn’t go back on their word and harm her—right?

“Will you let go of me?”

“Will you promise not to attack me again, but to sit down and do what I say?”

She was loathe to consent to his admonition but knew she was out of options. “Yes.”

The medic released his hold and Maressa sat back on her bed.

“You must be hungry; I’ll get you something to eat.”

Maressa nodded, her heart rate calming—but adrenaline and anxiety still rushed periodically through her.

Captured by Team Magma.

She scrunched her eyes shut—no, no, no, no, she could not be their prisoner! If she was their prisoner, she wasn’t with Team Aqua, she didn’t have her Pokemon—

Her Pokemon!

Her eyes popped open—she had left her Pokeballs with Mickey before diving. She didn’t see any reason to recall her Pokemon while out in the ocean and only saw the risk of losing them. Did Team Aqua recall them all and get to safety?

As the medic walked back in with a plate of spaghetti, Maressa asked, “Were my Pokemon captured as well?”

He shook his head. “I honestly don’t know, I’m sorry. If it makes you feel better, I don’t think they were. I remember everyone was preoccupied with you being unconscious and not breathing. From what I remember, Team Aqua hightailed it and got out of there with all of their Pokemon.”

Maressa sighed as a huge weight released from her shoulders. The panic and anxiety left her; exhaustion seeped back into her bones.

In spite of the relief, a shard of pain pricked her heart.

My team left without me.

Why would they do that? It had been hammered into their heads the entire time she worked with Team Aqua: do what’s best for the team; leave no one behind.

Why was she left behind?

The medic put the plate of spaghetti in her hands and gave her a gentle smile.

“You should eat to recover your strength more quickly. I’ll be reassessing you periodically to see how you’re coming along. I’m going to my office.” He pointed to the door just across from Maressa. “If you need anything at all, just give me a shout.” He turned to go but stopped.

“Oh, my name is Derek, by the way.”

She smiled back at him. “Maressa.”

He flashed her one more smile before disappearing. Maressa barely had time to dwell on her situation before he poked his head out again.

“Oh, I almost forgot. My commander, Tabitha, wants to talk to you, so that’ll probably happen at some point tomorrow.”

The thought of talking to a Magma commander made Maressa’s stomach churn.

“Do you know why she wants to talk to me?”

“What?”

“Tabitha. Do you know what she wants me for?”

Derek blinked. “Tabitha is a guy.”

Maressa snorted. “A guy?

“Yes,” he said simply. He checked his watch again, then closed the door.

Maressa leaned back, the unease lessening as she smiled. A guy—a commander named Tabitha? Her worry abated; if that was really his name, it would be hard to take him seriously.

++++++++

It was hard to not be afraid of him.

Maressa sat on her bed; the commander sat across from her. She realized—with a jolt of fear—that it was the same commander she had battled at Mt. Chimney.

Now that he was much closer, she saw some purple hair sticking out from beneath his hood. He looked around the same age as Derek—but there was something much more sinister lurking behind his dark eyes. With Derek, at least, Maressa trusted that there was no malice, no ill intent—he just wanted to help her get better. But with Tabitha, behind his small coy smile, and his narrow dark eyes, Maressa felt something more malevolent.

Or maybe she was imagining it.

He smiled at her as he leaned back on the stool Derek had brought out for him. Maressa wished Derek would have stayed—but Tabitha wanted to talk with Maressa alone.

“Welcome to our base. I trust you’ve been well-cared for?”

Maressa’s face burned. He was mocking her, and she knew it.

But she couldn’t think of anything to say.

“Derek told me you might have nitrogen bubbling up in your joints,” Tabitha went on when Maressa remained silent, “and that it’s best if you wait here. Otherwise, I’d meet with you in my office. Derek said you haven’t been in increasing pain, at least not yet. Have you?”

Maressa could only stare into his dark eyes and at his small smile. She tried to think: if Shelly were in this position, what would she say? How would she react? She always knew what to do.

But Maressa had no idea what that was. So she went with the first thing that came to mind.

“What do you want?” she asked Tabitha.

He shrugged. “I wanted to see you myself—a Team Aqua member is very valuable around here, after all. And I’ve been itching to talk to you. Our battle at Mt. Chimney was memorable. I wish your Pokemon were here, and we could do a sort of repeat, whether to demonstrate to the troops or just for the fun of it.”

“So my Pokemon are free?” she asked breathlessly.

He raised an eyebrow. “You really have been out of it, haven’t you? Yes, your Pokemon are free—at least, they’re back with Team Aqua.”

His smile widened. “I wanted to tell you: you fought very well in that battle yesterday. I’m impressed with how you commanded all the water Pokemon and how well you managed with riding atop your Seaking.”

Maressa’s face flushed. She expected—well, she didn’t know what she expected. Probably belittling or verbal assault—but certainly not to be praised.

And she didn’t want to go along with it.

“Whatever you’re trying to do—whatever you’re trying to get out of me, or what information you want me to tell you—it won’t work,” she hissed. “My team will come back for me, and I’ll be out of here.”

Tabitha still gazed at her with his self-assuring smile.

“And what makes you say that?”

“We’re a team—no one is left behind, and we always look out for each other.”

“But you were left behind. I know you were underwater and passed out for a long period of time, but once the rest of Team Aqua saw you go under, they recalled their Pokemon and got out of there.”

Maressa’s heart sank—

They left me like that?

Tabitha gazed critically at her; his smile faded into small frown. “If Team Aqua really is so intent about looking out for each other, why do you think they would do that?”

Maressa tried to think—but her brain didn’t seem to be working. She couldn’t shake the feeling of abandonment, couldn’t shake off the needles of pain pricking and sticking deeper into her heart. Almost involuntarily, her head and shoulders slumped forward.

“Look at it from their point of view,” Tabitha said. “The rest of them were on deck while you were in the water. You commanded most of the Pokemon, and the flow of Team Aqua’s battle generally went with how you fought. They saw you knocked off Seaking and then hit with a solar beam attack—and they didn’t see you come back up. What does it look like?”

Maressa looked into Tabitha’s eyes; he stared back patiently, waiting for her to answer.

“They… think I’m dead?”

Vocalizing it somehow made the statement much worse; it was no longer just a mere thought. Saying it out loud made Maressa realize how likely that situation looked.

Tabitha smiled again and nodded. “Exactly. They don’t know you’re here at all. What is there for them to save?”

Dread settled deeper into Maressa’s heart—she looked away from Tabitha. Feeling abandoned and hopeless was bad enough; looking into his smug, gloating face was unbearable.

She clenched her hands into fists—no, that couldn’t be!

“I will get back to them,” she said, raising her eyes to meet Tabitha’s. “I’m sure Team Aqua has something you guys would want, and I know I’d be a likely trade. I’m not giving up on my team.”

He tilted his head slightly. “But Maressa, do you want to go back to them?”

“Of course! I—”

“Again, think of it from their point of view,” he cut across. “If you were still with Team Aqua and heard that another member—whom everyone thought had died—was captured and ready to be handed back over, what would Team Aqua do with that person? Put them back in the same position they had, as if their capture never happened?

“They don’t know what you’ve done or what you’ve told us. For all they know, you could have given away everything you know about Team Aqua. Why would they want to keep you around or promote you if you’ve done that?”

Fear settled into Maressa’s stomach. She felt sick. She blinked several times—for some reason, it was difficult to register his words.

But no—Tabitha was her enemy, he was messing with her! He wasn’t honest—none of this could be true!

And yet… Maressa couldn’t think of any other way things would go. She couldn’t think of how things would work out otherwise. And there was something in the matter-of-fact way of speaking that made her suspect he was being honest.

“Going back won’t help you, Maressa,” he said quietly.

She stiffened. She hated hearing him say her name.

“Then what do you expect me to do?” she snapped. “Waste away here?”

“We wouldn’t waste you. I’ve seen the way you fight. I’ve seen the way you care for your Pokemon. You were doing reasonably well on Team Aqua, I’m sure. And Team Magma will be happy to have you.”

Maressa started—his words hit her like a hammer. She opened her eyes wide in shock. His expression hadn’t changed; he still gazed at her patiently.

“Y—you’re kidding!”

“Why would I? Think about what I said. You know it’s true. You and I have battled before, and our battles were close. I’ve seen you command several Pokemon and I know you show a lot of promise. You know about Team Aqua: their bases, their members—information that can be very valuable to us. And you know that you have no future if you go back to Team Aqua. This is in your best interest, as well.”

“I have four Water-type Pokemon!” she shouted. Her face was red; blood rushed through her veins—she couldn’t believe what she was hearing, and somehow shouting seemed to be a way to fend off his words. In the rush of blood, her brain defogged a little. “Why would we want to help you expand the land?”

His eyes sparkled with excitement. “Been listening to what Team Aqua has been telling you, have you? That all life depends on the ocean—that the ocean is dying directly due to human action? That we’re going to cause the world’s oceans and seas to become polluted and die?”

“Yes, and I know it’s true!”

“Then I have something interesting to show you.”

“I don’t care what you have—I’ll never do something that would betray my Pokemon!”

“You care a lot for your Pokemon,” he murmured.

“Of course I do! They’re everything to me!”

“And that’s what Team Magma aims for, as well. People and Pokemon should exist together—work together as friends and teammates. Pokemon shouldn’t just be viewed and used as tools for children to fight with.”

“No,” Maressa said quickly. “They shouldn’t.”

Tabitha nodded. “And we hope to change that point of view—to get rid of the modern idea of the ‘Pokemon League’ controlling everything, encouraging children to pick out Pokemon, train them solely for battle, give them drugs and medicines to turn them into fighting machines. It’s not healthy for either the trainer or the Pokemon, and it’s not sustainable. We need to encourage people to go back to befriending Pokemon, growing with them, and raising them the natural way.”

As she listened to his words, Maressa’s heart rate slowed; she felt calm again. Perhaps because they were no longer talking about her—or perhaps because it was all something that made sense to her. Without blood pounding through her veins, exhaustion hit and her brain felt slower again.

She nodded. “That’s what Team Aqua thinks, too—what I think.”

“Our teams agree on a lot—there’s more we agree than we disagree on.”

She shot him a glare. “I wouldn’t say that.”

He shrugged. “The way we go about things is differently, sure, but our teams largely think the same way. We have no interest in controlling Kyogre or expanding the oceans, and doing so really wouldn’t benefit Water-type Pokemon—”

“What?”

“Having more water doesn’t help marine ecosystems; the difference in temperature, pH—”

“No, no, not that,” Maressa said quickly. “What did you say about expanding the sea?”

He didn’t respond immediately but continued to survey her with his dark, calculating stare. Maressa tried to read his face; his cold gaze showed little expression.

“Control Kyogre and expand the sea,” he said bluntly.

Maressa could do little more than stare in utter bafflement. What was he talking about?

“You don’t even know.” He perked up slightly as if something clicked in his brain.

“In your point of view, what is Team Aqua up to?” he asked her.

“In my point of view? What does that mean? Team Aqua is trying to fight for better Pokemon-human interactions and clean aquatic environments to better the lives of Pokemon everywhere!”

“So why does your team send you out on missions? They probably don’t tell you everything, do they? There were underwater ruins on the route where we met you—what were you looking for down there?”

“None of your business,” she snapped.

He smiled. “But it is your business, and you don’t know why you were sent out, do you?”

Maressa glared at him—but words failed her. He was right. How could she respond to that?

When she stayed silent, Tabitha continued on.

“The oceans of our planet were formed by the ancient Pokemon, Kyogre. It’s said to have the power to cause unending rain, and Team Aqua wants to control Kyogre to expand the sea.

“Exactly how you’re going to do that yet, we aren’t sure. We know that you need the Blue Orb to control it, but as far as we know, nobody knows where that item is.

“That’s what you’re up to every time your team sends you out to go look somewhere—underwater caves, ruins, old temples… You may just think that they’re having you gather information or do research, but they’re really looking for the ancient Pokémon or the Orb.”

Maressa stared back at him—if he was lying, then he was good at it.

That was it—he had to be lying.

“That can’t be true!” she blurted out. “Team Aqua wants what’s best for the oceans—they know that expanding them won’t do any good!”

“Then what do you think they’re trying to do?”

“I—they’re—we’re doing… research!”

“Research on what?”

Maressa could only stare back at him, feeling confused, helpless. None of this made sense!

And yet, it made perfect sense.

All the secrecy surrounding the higher operations of the teams; their interest in lore and history; exploring the secret, ancient places… If Tabitha’s words were true, then Maressa’s questions were answered.

But she didn’t want them answered that way.

“What about Team Magma? What do you guys do—trying to expand more land! That’s also going to bring about destruction for everyone!”

“And what makes you say that?”

She stared at him in shock for a second. Why did he always answer her questions with more questions?

“It’s common knowledge! People rely on the sea to live—everyone needs water!”

“People need water, but not necessarily the sea. Our aim wouldn’t be to get rid of streams, lakes, rivers, or anything that provides freshwater to communities. It will make more land so that people and Pokemon have more room to go about with their lives.”

Maressa tried to think—but her brain wouldn’t work. Why didn’t her brain work? Even with the excitement, it all seemed so foggy. Nothing was so clear. And the exhaustion hit her harder than before. She slumped farther forward, involuntarily curling up: her knees curled up onto the bed, so she could only peer at Tabitha through the gap between her legs. Her elbows, shoulders, and wrists all turned inward, as well, as though she could curl into a ball and hide from the truth she didn’t want to see.

“Are you doing that on purpose?” Tabitha asked her.

She didn’t respond—she only stared at him, her eyelids heavy with exhaustion. Tabitha stood up and came over to her, reaching out to touch her—

“Stop!” she hissed.

But she didn’t feel him. She saw him tapping her shoulder, but she couldn’t feel any of it. She stared, wide-eyed, horror settling into her tired heart as she watched him tap what might as well have been a puppet that looked like her.

“Can’t feel that, can you?”

Without waiting for an answer, he turned around and knocked on the door on the far wall.

“Derek? She has the bends.”

Derek immediately came out, looking at Maressa with concern.

“Ah, I see. No need to worry, Maressa—you’ll be fine. We’ll just give you some pure oxygen, and your body will straighten itself out. Tabitha, can you help me lay her down?”

Maressa simply watched—without feeling—the two of them lay her on her back. Derek wheeled her bed over to what looked like a long, clear, horizontal tube with a sort of monitor attached to it. As he pushed her, he spoke to her gently.

“I’m just going to put you in that decompression chamber. It’ll deliver one-hundred-percent oxygen to you; if you’re no longer breathing in nitrogen, then the nitrogen bubbles in your joints will dissolve, and your body will straighten out and feel like yours again. It’s nothing to worry about; you’ll feel like yourself again soon.”

Maressa eyelids were so heavy—she lowered them, sinking into darkness as her mind rested, as her body truly felt like nothing…

Fresh air soon flowed into her, filling her lungs and clearing her mind—again. She blinked several times. The decompression chamber was clear, and she saw Derek sitting in a chair just outside, his back turned to her as he spoke with Tabitha.

Maressa closed her eyes again, exhausted. Tabitha’s words kept hitting her, flowing into her mind, making everything much worse. She didn’t want to think about it—none of it could be true!

But in her heart, part of her believed him.

They think I’m dead.

As she breathed in oxygen, feeling returned to her body and her joints straightened out. She was able to lie flat on her bed again. She could think and recall more clearly—and with clearer thinking came fresh, sharp pain.

My own teammates think I’m dead.

They weren’t coming back for her. They didn’t know she was there. What was left for her?

Tears welled up beneath her eyelids and rolled down her cheeks; her throat closed up and the muscles in her body tensed as the full force of abandonment washed over her. Opening her eyes, she stared blearily at the blank chamber top a few inches above her.

She turned her head: Derek’s back was to her, but Tabitha’s eyes met hers through the decompression chamber window. He saw her crying.

But it didn’t matter. If what he said was true—if Team Aqua had truly left her for dead—then she had nothing left. What would become of her? What about her Pokemon? What was going to happen—why did they leave he like that? Didn’t they care about her? Wouldn’t they at least check, wouldn’t they try to retrieve her body—

Why?

As Maressa wallowed in self-pity and pain, she didn’t know how long she was in the decompression chamber for. By the time Derek took her out and wheeled her bed up against the wall, the tears on her cheeks had dried.

She opened her eyes—a Breloom followed Derek around the clinic, hopping about and chittering away excitedly.

She had seen that Breloom—standing on Team Magma’s ship, shooting solar beams and taking their team apart, hitting Sharpedo off the deck and into the ocean—knocking her off of Seaking and sending her plummeting to the depths.

The memory of it brought a fresh wave of tears and sobs. She hugged herself, lying on the bed, feeling so lonely and lost.

“Maressa? Are you okay?”

Derek walked over to her, his brown eyes looking concernedly at her while Breloom sidled up next to him.

“Wh—what am I going to do?” Maressa choked out.

“What do you mean?”

“Ta—Tabitha said—said that Team—Team Aqua thinks I’m dead. That—that they won’t come for me!” Sniffling, she looked at Derek through red, bleary eyes. “Do you think that’s true?”

He looked apprehensive, as if he didn’t know what to say.

“I… I’m honestly not sure—I hadn’t thought about it.” He smiled—a warm, genuine smile. “But it’s okay. You’re here now, and we’ll take care of you.”

She scrunched her eyes shut—nothing he said dissolved the pain settling into her heart.

“Is there anything I can get you? Are you hungry? I can get you some food.”

She opened her eyes.

“Can I just get a hug?”

Derek hesitated, as if the idea of giving a hug was uncomfortable for him. But Breloom immediately leapt up onto the bed with a happy cry.

“Breloom, wait!”

But Maessa had already sat up and wrapped her arms around the Pokemon; he wrapped his arms around her in return, letting Maressa cry her worries out into his mossy shoulders.

“Wait—that’s not a good idea! Breloom releases a lot of spores—I’ve been paralyzed and poisoned by him before…”

His voice trailed off; Maressa kept hugging Breloom. His touch considerably calmed her: fresh tears no longer fell from her eyes and her breathing was much slower and deeper.

Pulling back, she looked at Breloom. His black eyes shone with alacrity—he chirruped cheerfully. Maressa smiled. She had never tried raising Grass-types (and had never interacted with them much) but she found the Breloom quite endearing.

“You’re the one who I fought in that battle outside, at sea, aren’t you? You’re really strong—your solar beam ripped the gasket off of my dive gear and sent me into the water! Come to think of it, you’re the reason I’m here now…”

Breloom seemed to take it as a compliment. He blushed and waved a hand as if to say, “aw, shucks.”

She patted his mushroom-domed head. “But I don’t blame you. You were just doing what you had to, didn’t you? Didn’t mean to really cause any damage…”

After getting the pain and crying out of her system, exhaustion hit Maressa like a brick. Exhaling deeply, she lay back down on the bed as Breloom hopped off.

She closed her eyes, pulled a sheet over her, and allowed sleep to overtake her weary body.
 
Last edited:

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
Maressa's in a tight spot, and--oof--without any of her pokemon! Sounds like she's on course to get back home ... but the damage will have been done. Some degree of trust has been broken. I get why you cut away, but the scene with Sarah was harder for me to get into because I'm not invested in her as a character.

Was it a bug? Was a bug crawling on her leg?
A human hand feels so different from a bug, it was hard for me to suspend disbelief on this one. I could maybe buy it more if she were drifting in and out of dreams and she imagined something from her dream grabbing her?

replaced with a t-shirt that was too large for her and shorts.
Suggestion: a too-large t-shirt and shorts.

was dressed in white scrubs
It feels like this is a source of comfort for her, like she takes it as a sign of safety, and I want to poke that a little. I can't quite tell by the descriptions if she thinks she's in a real hospital or an Aqua facility. What is Team Aqua/Magma's relationship to hospitals anyway? Do they have to avoid them because of their criminal history, or can they use them? It might also be nice to get a little inkling of Maressa's history with Aqua and injury. Has she ever been in an Aqua medical bay before? Has she been hurt on a mission before? (Seems like probably not!)

“Do you know what happened to my Seaking? Is he all right?”

The man shook his head. “I have no idea. Sorry.”
:c

“AM or PM?”

“Why would I be awake at four AM?”
Biiig tipoff that she's not in a real hospital, if she didn't know already. I can't tell what she makes of that though.

She eyed him suspiciously. Something was odd.

“Why?”
I'd cut "something was odd" or replace it with something along the lines of ... He didn't sound like he was empathizing--he was apologetic. I also think you can bump that "Why" up and make it part of the same paragraph. Her body language is essentially like part of the dialogue here.

“Let go of me!”

“No.”
Ha, a nice moment. This could be a place to expand on that "No" and show a bit of his true colors--to what degree is he looking out for her wellbeing and trying to help her, and to what degree does he just want her to sit down and be a good prisoner patient?

“Will you promise to not try and hurt me or run away, but just sit on the bed and do what I tell you?”
This felt a little like a check-list rather than natural dialogue. Maybe instead: "Will you promise to sit and do what I tell you? No more kicking."

“I almost forgot to tell you: my commander, Tabitha, wanted to see you after you woke up, so I’ll take you to over there in a bit.”

"Do you know what she wants me for?"
LOL.

The main source of her discomfort wasn’t from the claustrophobic feel of the cluttered office or the gloomy light given off by a single lamp. Rather, it was from the calculating gaze bored into her by his black eyes.
I like this sentiment, but I'd reword to make it flow a little better. The office was dimly lit and claustrophobic, cluttered with __. But Maressa's real source of discomfort was his calculating gaze. I'm also very curious what Tabitha's office is cluttered with! Is he hoarding newspapers? Igneous rock? Plates he hasn't brought back to the cafeteria in a long time? Books about Hoenn legendaries? Etc. Good opportunity to sneak in more characterization for him.

“… Know what?”

“Lavaridge’s economy just went down the drain.”

Maressa stared at him quizzically.
I grew up on a hot spring without any volcanoes nearby, so I had to Google this to double-check. Nice way to justify that this action is a problem! The canon really doesn't offer much there.

“Our number-one rule is that no one is left behind. So there’s no way—”
I would've been nice to see this dropped earlier! It doesn't have as much impact hearing it for the first time now. But it would be easy to make this something Mark says to Maressa to reassure her.

“Team Aqua isn’t going to come for you because, as far as they know, you’ve already betrayed them and told us everything you know.
This doesn't ring true for me. I can't tell if the intention here is that he's trying to psych her out, or if they both think this is how it works. If they think she's given up information, it would still make sense to get her back, to figure out what exactly she told them.

“I can understand if you don’t want to go back to an organization like that.” His voice softened, sending a chill up Maressa’s spine. “After all, you did put up a decent fight. It’s unfortunate that you didn’t have teammates reliable enough to pull you out of trouble. It can’t be easy to deal with, can it?” He was still frowning. “Betrayal. Being left behind. Not seen as important enough.”
Part of me want him to neg her harder? Like, really plant ideas of what her team might think of her in her head, put words in their mouths. Another part of me is glad he didn't because it suuuure does seem like you're slowly nudging them together too, and that would make it harder for me to like him. He's pretty ... rough ... as-is. At this stage it would take a big shift in Tabitha for me to see him as likable, but maybe that's the plan.

but his cold gaze expressed little emotion.

“Control Kyogre and expand the sea,” he said bluntly.
Hm, I'm wondering at his lack of emotion here! Is this something he worries about? Does he think they can do it, or that they're crazy? (And what about Maressa?)

they probably wouldn’t have nearly the same number of team members as they do now.”
A little wordy. Suggestion: probably wouldn't have nearly the same numbers they do now.

“All of our members know that we’re trying to create more land. We, at least, don’t have a goal that’s so obviously destructive that we have to hide it.”
Again, I can't tell if he's just drunk his own Kool-aid here or if we're playing Sapphire version, not Emerald, and this is Totally Fine. I would expect Maressa with her background in bio and love of oceans to make a rebuttal about more land = harming existing aquatic ecosystems.

“Well, I signed a contract with them, so I can’t leave and don’t really have anywhere else to go, so I…”
!
This is news! I wonder about not having anywhere else to go though. Did she have a fight with her family that we don't know about?

She really wished he wouldn’t smile.
It's not clear if it's because his smile is scary, or if she finds his smile comforting/alluring and doesn't want to.

At the thought of her him, a light flicked on her head. Her Pokémon were still with Team Aqua, and she knew that no matter what, she had to return for them.
Oh wow, yeah. The babies. gotta stay with em.

training simulations for spying.
Could be simply spy training. Again, this raises a lot of questions for me! Spying on whom? Magma? The government? What does this training look like?

“Why did you come to this base? Didn’t Shelly send you all out? You know you’re to report back to whoever sent you out unless told otherwise.”

Opening his mouth, Mickey was about to answer, but Sarah could take it no longer.

“Maressa’s been captured by Team Magma!”
Throughout, I'm having trouble getting a sense for how authority is wielded in Team Aqua. Are people generally scared of commanders ... or not? It feels a little more casual and less authoritarian than I'd expect. Like, there's a lot of bluster, but the punishments don't seem to be that bad. And here Sarah gets to interrupt without any consequences at all.

“Then you, Michael Angelo, are permanently stripped of rank.
Big name.

When I tell Archie about this, he’ll decide what to do with you.”
Huh, yeah, we haven't seen Archie or Maxie up close yet! Looking forward to seeing what you do with them.

“He claimed there was no other way out... Yes... Yes... He—” Leaning back in his chair, Matt looked as though he was in pain, and started to relay what Mickey had said through the phone. Sarah grew slightly nervous as she realized he must have been speaking to their boss.

“Yes sir... I don’t know, I—yes, I will... Right now? Where do you want us to go? ... Yes, sir.” At last, he put down the receiver and looked up at Sarah. “Did you want something?”
This didn't quite feel like a conversation she should be allowed to overhear! It also didn't add much for me, since he's repeating information we just got.
 
Last edited:
Chapter 6

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
Maressa's in a tight spot, and--oof--without any of her pokemon! Sounds like she's on course to get back home ... but the damage will have been done. Some degree of trust has been broken. I get why you cut away, but the scene with Sarah was harder for me to get into because I'm not invested in her as a character.
Hey! I'm sorry this is such a late reply. I've had... various things going on with my family members in real life lately and it's taken my mind out of fanfiction. I'll get around to reviewing the latest chapter of Continental Divides soon! Sorry about that ._.


A human hand feels so different from a bug, it was hard for me to suspend disbelief on this one. I could maybe buy it more if she were drifting in and out of dreams and she imagined something from her dream grabbing her?
Good point! I added the bug thing on a whim, not sure why I thought it was a great idea lol

It feels like this is a source of comfort for her, like she takes it as a sign of safety, and I want to poke that a little. I can't quite tell by the descriptions if she thinks she's in a real hospital or an Aqua facility. What is Team Aqua/Magma's relationship to hospitals anyway? Do they have to avoid them because of their criminal history, or can they use them? It might also be nice to get a little inkling of Maressa's history with Aqua and injury. Has she ever been in an Aqua medical bay before? Has she been hurt on a mission before? (Seems like probably not!)
Good questions! Maressa thinks she's in a Team Aqua facility, though she hasn't stayed in one herself yet. For the most part, the Teams get by with their own medics but can go into hospitals if needed. This gets expanded on more later, in how the Teams function as part of society and operate under different names.

Heartbreak will happen (for her, probs not the readers lol)

Biiig tipoff that she's not in a real hospital, if she didn't know already. I can't tell what she makes of that though.
Heheh, fair enough. I didn't realize or really think about that when I wrote this, but after having visited a friend of mine in the hospital several times, I know that everyone's up all hours of the night.

I like that you noticed this in your fic and changed his gender entirely lol

I like this sentiment, but I'd reword to make it flow a little better. The office was dimly lit and claustrophobic, cluttered with __. But Maressa's real source of discomfort was his calculating gaze. I'm also very curious what Tabitha's office is cluttered with! Is he hoarding newspapers? Igneous rock? Plates he hasn't brought back to the cafeteria in a long time? Books about Hoenn legendaries? Etc. Good opportunity to sneak in more characterization for him.
Thanks for this tip! I had always imagined with newspapers and book scans etc. I should elaborate more on it!

I grew up on a hot spring without any volcanoes nearby, so I had to Google this to double-check. Nice way to justify that this action is a problem! The canon really doesn't offer much there.
I think I got this from the Pokemon Adventures/Pokemon Special manga. But that also rreminded me of a funny meme I saw lol I'll post it if I can find it.

I would've been nice to see this dropped earlier! It doesn't have as much impact hearing it for the first time now. But it would be easy to make this something Mark says to Maressa to reassure her.
Good to know! Thanks for bringing that up!

This doesn't ring true for me. I can't tell if the intention here is that he's trying to psych her out, or if they both think this is how it works. If they think she's given up information, it would still make sense to get her back, to figure out what exactly she told them.
Oh for sure, and he knows that. He's trying to scare her, and even though she's fairly reasonable (or I try to describe her that way for the most part) her whole situation makes her scared and more prone to believing him.

Part of me want him to neg her harder? Like, really plant ideas of what her team might think of her in her head, put words in their mouths. Another part of me is glad he didn't because it suuuure does seem like you're slowly nudging them together too, and that would make it harder for me to like him. He's pretty ... rough ... as-is. At this stage it would take a big shift in Tabitha for me to see him as likable, but maybe that's the plan.
Hmmm I've gotten a lot of feedback on Tabitha and his character, so I'm just going to stay quiet about this right now and let you see you end up feeling about him :)

Hm, I'm wondering at his lack of emotion here! Is this something he worries about? Does he think they can do it, or that they're crazy? (And what about Maressa?)
I tried to make him stoic and not very expressive (which didn't work in the first draft because he was a melodramatic DRAMA QUEEN)

Again, I can't tell if he's just drunk his own Kool-aid here or if we're playing Sapphire version, not Emerald, and this is Totally Fine. I would expect Maressa with her background in bio and love of oceans to make a rebuttal about more land = harming existing aquatic ecosystems.
I don't want to say too much except that he believes that will become of it is BEST, but not necessarily beneficial... Which I realize doesn't make much sense at this point. And yes, Maressa definitely knows that more land =/= better world, but at the moment she's more caught up in her own worries with her team.

!
This is news! I wonder about not having anywhere else to go though. Did she have a fight with her family that we don't know about?
She meant she doesn't have other jobs lined up in terms of "nowhere else to go;" she's on good terms with her family (as long as they don't know she lied to them about Team Aqua)

It's not clear if it's because his smile is scary, or if she finds his smile comforting/alluring and doesn't want to.
O_O
Oh, yeah, I should probably clarify it to make it apparent that it's the former. She's intimidated by Tabitha, not attracted to him (I realize those aren't necessarily mutually exclusive all the time, but here she's solely the former)



Throughout, I'm having trouble getting a sense for how authority is wielded in Team Aqua. Are people generally scared of commanders ... or not? It feels a little more casual and less authoritarian than I'd expect. Like, there's a lot of bluster, but the punishments don't seem to be that bad. And here Sarah gets to interrupt without any consequences at all.
Depends on who it is. Shelly was MUCH stricter (though since I cut out her chapter... I guess people would no longer have a way of knowing that) whereas Matt is more laid back and this causes different character dynamics, especially in future chapters.

Huh, yeah, we haven't seen Archie or Maxie up close yet! Looking forward to seeing what you do with them.
Heh, I'm not super impressed with myself for how I handle them, since I wanted this story to primarily be about grunts. But they will appear!

This didn't quite feel like a conversation she should be allowed to overhear! It also didn't add much for me, since he's repeating information we just got.
Fair enough.
Thanks again for the review! I'll get around to reviewing Continental Divides when I'm less frazzled. Always good to hear from you!


Hi everyone! This is another fairly long chapter. If you have any thoughts or critiques, I'm happy to hear them! Enjoy!

Chapter 6



"Please?"

Claydol groaned, firmly denying the request.

“Come on. It’s easy, and what else are you going to spend your time doing? All you do all day is float next to me and bother me while I’m trying to work.”

Derek turned around and faced Claydol. His numerous red eyes were half-closed and surveyed the human with amusement. In spite of Derek’s provocation, the Pokemon didn’t respond.

“Won’t you, please? I actually have a patient to take care of for once, and you know that I hate doing inventory.”

Looking him over with an unchanged expression—not that his expression could change much, anyway—Claydol groaned again.

The answer was still the same.

Turning away, Derek sighed as he walked towards the medical room. He pushed open the door and saw Maressa lying awake on her bed. She flexed her arms, studying the muscles carefully. She was unusually brawny for a girl; while her muscles were lean and slim, they were well-defined—more well-defined than those of any girls Derek knew. Sighing, she relaxed her arms and looked up at Derek. He gave a small wave and headed to his office.

“Who’s your friend?”

“Hm?”

Derek turned to see Claydol floating by Maressa’s bedside. She sat up and gazed at him with curiosity and awe.

“Oh, that’s just Claydol. He helps me out when I need to get some stuff done.” After a second’s pause, he added, “Or he just bothers me when he’s too lazy to do anything.”

She reached up a hand, as though about to pet the Pokemon, and asked, “May I?”

Derek nodded and Claydol rumbled his consent. Maressa ran her fingers along the earthen body, rubbing the white patterns that grooved his mid-section.

“He’s beautiful…”

Claydol gave an appreciative groan, but Derek noticed that there was more than just respect in her voice. There was something forlorn, some note of longing, underneath the outward awe.

She must be upset about not having her Seaking with her, he realized. The thought stirred sympathy within him; he couldn’t imagine being stuck in one place without Claydol, Breloom or Golbat.

He glanced at the door then moved across the room and sat on the bed opposite Maressa’s. There would be time to do inventory later. Actually, there probably wouldn’t, but he didn’t feel like doing it anyway. Besides, he couldn’t get into too much trouble—he was one of the few medics on the team, after all.

Maressa patted the large earthen doll. “I know Breloom’s a fighter, but what about you? Do you like to battle, or would you rather stay on the sidelines?”

Claydol groaned an answer. Derek sat stiffly, a little surprised that she was talking directly to his Pokemon and not asking him. She was the first to do so. Everyone else he had met always talked to the trainer.

“He’s not much of a battler,” Derek informed her. She turned her amber eyes on him as he spoke. “He can fight when he needs to, but he mainly helps me out in here.”

“He knows how to do all of this medical stuff?”

He shrugged. “A bit. I’m usually the one that handles the patients. He’ll get out or put together whatever equipment I need, though.”

“That’s cool. I tried teaching my Pokemon calculus, but Lanturn and Sharpedo weren’t interested. Seaking showed interest, but I don’t think he really understood any of it. Golduck told me that it was a waste of time and that I shouldn’t bother trying to teach him anything as useless and boring as math.”

Taken aback, Derek noted, “Your Golduck seems pretty… stubborn.” He thought this was an understatement but couldn’t think of anything else to say and didn’t want to run the risk of insulting her Pokemon.

“You have no idea. I can hardly ever get him to listen to me.”

“Does he battle much?”

“All the time—he’s the strongest Pokemon I have and he works the best with me. He knows what I want him to do and does it without question. Sure, outside of battle, he can be rude, but I can tell that he doesn’t really mean it.”

She stopped petting Claydol. Her eyes fell and she slumped forward slightly.

Derek couldn’t really think of what to say; he pitied her for being stuck alone and without her Pokemon, but it wasn’t something he could relate to and he didn’t think that there was anything he could do to make her feel better. He didn’t want to end their conversation on such a somber note, though.

“You, uh… you liked studying calculus?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah.” She snapped out of her dejection and sat upright again. “Math was always my favorite; I studied it throughout high school and college.”

“Where did you go for college?”

“I went to the Hoenn Institute of Technology and Architecture.”

“Oh, decided to stay regional?”

“Yeah, they have pretty incredible math and physics departments. Did you know that they have a particle accelerator?”

His eyes widened. “I didn’t know that! That’s pretty cool. I guess it’s no surprise, though, since most of the top scientists and researchers in Hoenn have gone there.”

“What about you? Where did you go?”

“I studied at the Johto Technological and Medical Institution.”

“Did you go to med school?”

“I…”

He paused—he always felt a little embarrassed when talking about this. But in his split second of silence Maressa cut across him.

“I don’t mean to be asking anything too personal, it’s just that if—I thought that if you had gone to med school, you probably could’ve gotten a job as a doctor pretty easily, and it would’ve paid a lot better than being on Team Magma.” Her words tumbled out in a rush as though she was worried about offending him.

“It’s all right, don’t worry about. It’s just that… Yeah, I went to med school—got accepted and started my first year and everything—but I never finished. I wanted to, but it burned me out a lot more quickly than I thought it would.”

He shifted. The topic of burning out and choosing to quit was never without shame.

“And while I was in school, I heard about Team Magma—they said I could be a medic on the team even if I joined then right then and there. Med school is expensive, and the pay I get here is really good. It's like working early without having to pay for all of school. And it seems like my teammates were right. There hasn't been a single Pokémon brought to me that I haven't been able to cure yet."

"What about people?"

"To be honest, you're pretty much the only person I've really worked with. Sure, there have been cuts, burns, bruised bones, and things like that, but nobody else has had to lie in a bed for a while." He smiled. "You get to be my first long-time patient."

“So you joined Team Magma because you were tired and wanted to pay off your college debt?”

“Well… No, there’s more to it than that.” He rubbed his eyes with both of his hands for a moment. “I might go back to school—I haven’t decided. But I needed to leave—at least for a bit.”

“Do you think you don’t want to do medicine anymore?”

“No, I want to do medicine and take care of patients more than anything! It was the studying and bookwork that fried me—I spent five years in college working myself to the bone just to be good enough for medical school. But then one of my professors suggested I ‘take a year off’ and do some lab or clinical work before applying. So I did—but that ‘year off’ wasn’t relaxing. I still studied, staying up late constantly reading research papers and analyzing data to get results and compile reports. I had to study for entrance exams into medical schools, go through interviews and file more paperwork. When I got in, I went straight into school from work—it was constant studying and bookwork…” He shook his head.

“I couldn’t handle it anymore. Team Magma offered me the chance to start doing medical work. And after over six years of burning out, it sounded like a dream—so I took it and I’m starting to pay off my dues for undergrad and med school.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “School is not cheap.”

“No, I’ve definitely learned that by now,” Maressa said. Her voice quieted and she stared down at her feet.

“So, why did you join Team Aqua? I told you my reasons for joining Team Magma.”

She grimaced. “I don’t have to pay for pre-med school, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have plenty left to pay off. Honestly, being able to pay off school was a pretty big reason for joining them…” Her voice trailed off, and she shifted her gaze away in embarrassment.

“So—in that regard—you’re in the same boat as I am.”

“Well, it’s more than just paying off school; I enjoy what I do. I get to fight Pokemon battles and spend plenty of time with my Pokemon.”

“If you’re in this for Pokemon battling, why don’t you enter Pokemon tournaments? They offer pretty hefty cash prizes.”

“I don’t know… A lot of the biggest ones are televised, and I’m not really comfortable with all of that. And I like getting recognition for when I’m good at something, but I don’t think I could ever be comfortable with appearing on TV and being famous or anything. Besides, those are super competitive; the best people spend all their time training their Pokemon and have really diverse teams. I just have four Water-type Pokemon, and they are strong, but I don’t think we would really stand a chance in a tournament like that.” She shifted her eyes. “Besides, when I joined Team Aqua, I heard that I would be helping Pokemon—that we were working for oceanic conservation and trying to better our world after humans damaged it.”

She was no longer smiling or warm. She shrunk against the back wall and averted her eyes from his. There was something odd about her words as well.

“ ‘When you joined’ them, you heard that? Has that changed?”

She shifted her amber eyes back to him. “I don’t know—well, there were things going on in my team that I didn’t know about. They never told us everything when they sent us on missions. They would just tell our squad leaders. I felt like they were dodging the questions I asked. And I was okay with it then, since I was just a grunt and I knew that obedience was the most important thing. But since then, I’ve heard stuff about what we do and I just—I—I don’t know…”

Taken aback, Derek studied her. Slouched back on the bed with such a lost look, she seemed so pathetic that he found himself feeling a little sorry for her.

“What did they tell you, then?”

“Not much, really. I could tell that there was something going on that they weren’t giving us all of the details about, but I just thought it was because I was a low-ranking member. I thought, the longer I worked with them, I would be told more.

“And then when I came here, Tabitha told me that Team Aqua’s goal is to take control of some ancient Pokemon and use it to expand the sea, and if that’s true… Well, that’ll be the opposite of everything I thought we were doing. He also told me that Team Aqua isn’t actually working for the environment. I don’t want to work for a team like that, but my team wouldn’t really be doing that, would they?”

She looked pleadingly at him as though she expected him to hold some answer that would refute all of her suspicions and secure her belief in the goodwill of Team Aqua.

But he couldn’t do that. That would be a lie, and if she was living a lie the entire time she worked with Team Aqua then it was time for her to face the truth.

“That is what your team is doing. At least as far as Team Magma knows, anyway.”

She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, she appeared more dejected and forlorn than he had seen her yet.

Derek’s stomach churned. Was she going to ask what Team Aqua was going to do to her? Had Tabitha told her that much yet?

“But… What about Team Magma?”

“What about us?”

“If Team Aqua is trying to expand the sea by controlling some sort of monster, then how are you guys going to try to expand the land? From what my team says, you guys are trying to make more land—aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“And you’re okay with that? You do realize that will cause destruction and kill a ton of people and Pokemon, right?”

He paused. He did not believe that creating more land would be bad for the planet—all scientific models pointing to that were just theoretic, after all—but he was not interested in arguing with a Team Aqua member about it.

Maressa apparently wasn’t one for pauses and quickly cut through the silence.

“You want to take care of people and do what’s best for them but you’re supporting a team that’s only going to get them killed?”

“No, I don’t think that creating more land will hurt people—“

“But what about the stuff you guys do? Team Magma terrorizes people and towns! Doesn’t that matter to you? Doesn’t the path to completing your goal matter just as much as the completion itself?”

He paused. She stared intently at him, her amber eyes blazing. He couldn’t think of much else to say—of course, he didn’t want to make ends meet by doing something unethical, but after all, he wasn’t doing anything wrong.

“I just take care of the wounded. I don’t see anything wrong in that.”

“You’re doing it for a criminal organization when you could be doing it for anyone else! You just didn’t finish med school!”

Blood rushed to his face and he balled his hands into fists. Maressa glared at him and he glared back. He swallowed—he wanted to say something—how could she say that about him? She didn’t know his life. But he couldn’t think of how to put it into words.

“Dol…”

The two humans started as Claydol rumbled. Derek forgot he was there, floating inches from him as he had talked with his patient.

Seeing this as an opportunity to get out of the uncomfortable conversation, Derek stood up.

“You’re right, Claydol, we should get back to work.”

Ignoring the Pokemon as he blinked his several eyes in confusion, Derek turned to Maressa.

“We need to get back to work,” he said, ignoring the Pokemon’s protestant rumblings. Derek turned and walked across the infirmary to the supply door.

“Derek?”

He was about to exit when Maressa called. He turned—the fire was gone from her eyes. She sat upright on her bed, her legs stretched out, shoulders slumped, looking at him sadly.

“Thank you for taking care of me.”

Derek sighed. Maressa looked sad—even a bit apologetic and she really did seem grateful.

His anger abated. He smiled at her.

“You’re welcome.”

++++++++++++++++++++++++

Derek pushed the door open to Tabitha’s office. Mightyena lay on the floor and jumped as the hinges creaked. Seeing Derek, the canine wagged his tail and let out a whine. Derek scratched the Pokemon’s head, his nails digging through the matted, tangled fur.

Tabitha sat at his desk, looking through a few scientific publications.

“You wanted to see me?” Derek asked as he sat on the floor with Mightyena.

Tabitha tore his eyes away from the paper and looked at Derek. “Yeah. How’s the Team Aqua member doing?”

“Maressa? I think she’s okay. She hasn’t had to go back into the decompression chamber, at least not yet, but it’s hard to tell the extent of damage for diving accidents. She’s exhausted and really out of it, though—which is to be expected.”

“How about emotionally?”

Derek shrugged. “Crying quite a bit. Do you really think Team Aqua thinks she’s dead?”

Tabitha nodded. “I’m willing to bet on it. It’s not like them to leave their team members behind. They would normally at least make sure she’s dead before taking off.” His eyes roved up to the ceiling. “I’m wondering if it was a relatively new or young grunt commanding them. Maybe he panicked once Maressa went down and took off. If Matt or Shelly were there, they either would’ve tried to retrieve the body or sent a Pokemon after her to finish her off.”

“What?!”

Derek stared at Tabitha in wide-eyed horror. “Finish her off? You’re not serious—right?”

Tabitha gazed back at him impassively. “What else do you expect from Team Aqua? Their main priority is to not get caught. They do what’s best for the team, not the individual. If that means sacrificing a team member, then they’ll do it.”

Disgust held Derek’s heart with an icy grip. His hands hung limply over his knees as Mightyena stared expectantly, waiting for more head pats.

“Why would anyone join them?”

“Because they don’t broadcast details like that. None of the grunts know that their lives would be sacrificed in an instant. And I’m sure Maressa doesn’t know it—although if she stuck around longer and they wanted to promote her, they’d make sure her priorities were in line with theirs.”

“And do you really think she’ll join Team Magma? Everything you told her—that was just to get information about Team Aqua, right?”

“No. I honestly do think she’s a capable battler and I’d like to have her on our team. How high of a rank she can attain would be tricky to figure out if she’s defecting from Team Aqua. But even then, it depends if her motives are purely to save her own skin or a desire to actually help us in our goal. And from the sound of it, there was quite a bit about Team Aqua that she didn’t know. I’ll meet with her tomorrow and show her some of these—” he held up a few papers—“and see if I can get through to her.”

“What are those?”

“Big projects carried out by Hoenn’s government that report back with information on scientific catastrophes. And papers that refute them. She joined Team Aqua ‘for science’ and because it’s ‘right,’ which means she’s probably been eating everything the mainstream media has been pumping out for the past decade about human actions destroying the environment. What she—and most people—don’t know is that there is a lot of evidence to the contrary. It’s just not available to the public eye.”

Derek eyed the papers curiously. “If those aren’t publicly available, how did we get those?”

“We’ve got some people working at Devon funneling information back to us. A few days ago, a Team Aqua member was caught trying to steal some DNA regenerative material, but they didn’t succeed and they weren’t caught, so nothing came of it. At least not yet.”

Derek looked down at Mightyena as the canine nosed his hands. “And what if Maressa doesn’t believe you? What if she still thinks Team Aqua is trying to do what’s right?”

Tabitha put the papers down on his desk and blinked a few times. “Probably send her to Courtney.”

Chills shot up Derek’s spine. “You want to send her to Crazy Courtney?! I’ve heard she’s downright cruel when she punishes members on our team! Landon told me she took out a knife and threatened to cut him! And he said her Ninetales burned his arms!”

Tabitha nodded. “Yeah, she does like to scare people—”

“Not just scaring but hurting! Why on earth are you sending Maressa to her?”

“If Maressa won’t join us, then she’s useful only for information and as a bargaining tool. Courtney will interrogate her if she doesn’t willingly tell us what she knows.” He glanced at Derek. “If you know what Courtney does to our own teammates, why does it surprise you that she would do this to a prisoner?”

“I… I don’t know—maybe because Maressa doesn’t seem to know what’s going on? She seems so innocent.”

“She’s a Team Aqua member—at least for now. They’re never innocent. Anyway,” he sighed, “I just wanted to check with you on how she’s doing. I’ll have her come to my office tomorrow and I can show her this power analysis data. In the event that she doesn’t decide to join us, do you think she should still stay in the infirmary, or should we move her to a room we normally keep prisoners in?”

Dread trickled through Derek’s heart. “What are those rooms like?”

“They’re just empty rooms. They sit alone in the dark all day. We feed them twice a day—if they aren’t particularly bad.”

Derek didn’t want to know what constituted a ‘particularly bad’ Team Aqua member—and he didn’t want to think about it.

“I don’t think she should be all alone; her body might take weeks to recover. If she gets the bends again, it needs to be fixed right away.”

Tabitha nodded. “I thought so. I just wanted to check first. Thank you; you may go.”

As Derek walked back to his room, all he could feel was the cold fear clawing at his heart. If Maressa refused to join them—if she refused to give them any information—was she doomed to be their prisoner, subject to torture? After being abandoned and left for dead by her own team—a team that would have killed her—was the only future she had to look forward to one where she was burned by a Ninetales or carved open by a Team Magma commander?

Derek opened the door to the infirmary—and saw Maressa doing sit-ups in bed.

“Wh—what are you doing? You shouldn’t be exercising, you need to rest!”

She looked up at him, her tan face streaked with sweat. “I NEED to get back in shape! I can already tell I’m getting weaker just lying here—my muscle is disappearing!”

“You’re not going to help yourself at all if you try to push yourself when your body is recovering.”

“That’s just what a Team Magma member WOULD say!” she snapped. “If I’m going to be useful to Team Aqua, then I need to work out and get stronger.”

Derek was torn—he watched Maressa’s torso move back-and-forth as he tried to think of what to tell her. She needed to know the truth behind Team Aqua.

But was it his place to tell her? She had already learned from Tabitha about how Team Aqua abandoned her—maybe she was more likely to listen to him. He would surely tell her more about Team Aqua when he met with her tomorrow. It would be best to wait until after that and see what she thought.

And who knows? Derek thought as he shut the door to his room and turned on the light. Maybe she would join Team Magma, and they could be teammates!

But she has four Water-type Pokemon. And she didn’t just train them, she loved them—to a point that even Tabitha respected. Would she ever really work towards reducing the oceans?

Derek sat on his bed. And if Maressa didn’t join Team Magma, did she know what was in store for her? Would Tabitha tell her that Team Magma would torture her—

That they wouldn’t be much better than Team Aqua?

Derek scrunched his eyes shut and buried his face in his hands. How could he think that? Team Magma was leagues beyond Team Aqua!

But we aren’t above capturing and torturing prisoners.

How could that be? Derek knew Tabitha was tough on teammates and always fought to win in Pokemon battles, but would he seriously—deliberately—actively—hurt an enemy?

Derek lay back on his bed, staring at the ceiling, wishing his mind could be just as blank. Maybe Maressa would join Team Magma. That was definitely the best scenario. She would join them, she would be restored to full health and they wouldn’t do anything ethically questionable.

But what if she didn’t join Team Magma?

And even if she did, would it stop there? Or would Team Magma be just as prepared to employ the same tactics if they caught anyone else, be it another Team Aqua member or an official of the Pokemon League?

And if Maressa didn’t join, how could he just sit there and comply with her—with his patient—being harmed? How? What could he do—what would he do?

He didn’t know.

++++++++++++++++++++++++

The door closed softly behind Maressa. She perched on the edge of her set, nerves ablaze, blood coursing through her veins like a rapid river. A desk stacked high with various papers sat before her—and Tabitha was just on the other side of it, smiling at her.

“Should we really be in your office?" she blurted out. "What if I get the bends again?"

He shrugged. "Derek said this is fine. If you do get the bends, I can carry you to the infirmary. It's just down the hall. I wanted you to come here because I have some things to show you—and to talk." He leaned back, his elbows resting on the arms of his chair. He looked relaxed, but Maressa saw cold excitement behind his dark eyes. “I want to know your thoughts on our battles. What did you think about Mt. Chimney? I was impressed when your Golduck leveled the field to get rid of shadows. How did you decide that getting rid of Mightyena’s ability to move between them was worth Golduck being stuck in the open sun?”

Maressa squirmed slightly. Did he really want to have such a casual conversation with her? But Pokemon battling was one of her favorite subjects—and part of her couldn’t resist going on about it.

“We knew that your Mightyena was too fast and we wouldn’t be able to touch him if he kept on going back-and-forth through the shadows. If we couldn’t touch you, then it was pointless—it was worth the risk of Golduck fighting in the sun. And your Mightyena was barely even fighting—you almost got Shelly’s Ludicolo to take itself out but taunting and confusing it!”

He smiled. “Very observant—most grunts and new recruits don’t notice that during simulations. Their Pokemon end up taking themselves out. You must have memorable battles with Dark-types.”

“I train a Sharpedo.”

“Ah. Was that the one you rode on when you flew through the air and onto our ship?”

Maressa’s face burned—partly out of pride and partly out of embarrassment. “Yeah, he was.”

Tabitha’s smile widened. “I admit, I definitely did not see that coming. How did you think of it?”

She shrugged. “It’s something my Golduck tried with him when they trained before—Golduck’s more useful than I am, obviously, and the two of them fight well together.”

“I didn’t see your Golduck when we battled together outside. Is he only suited to freshwater?”

Maressa scowled. “No, he wasn’t there because after getting blasted by your Mightyena’s hyper beam, he was told he couldn’t battle for a few days.”

Tabitha’s smile was gone. “Is he okay?”

Maressa averted her eyes as regret trickled back into her heart. The image of Golduck covered in bandages and hooked up to an IV tube flashed before her mind—waves of guilty pain bled from her heart and welled up beneath her eyelids.

“He’s fine,” she said quietly.

She heard a shuffle—and saw Tabitha had put a tissue box on his desk.

“I know this is my fault!” she rounded on him, tears flowing freely from her eyes. Tabitha remained sitting back in his chair, his cool gaze resting on her.

“Golduck is my Pokemon, my responsibility, and I know I should have never pushed him that hard! I shouldn’t have had him use hydro pump out in the bright sunlight, I should have had him rest!”

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she breathed heavily, glaring at Tabitha. She wanted to curl up and cry—but she was too proud and refused to look away from him this time.

Tabitha dipped his head. “You’ve learned. And it won’t happen again. That is invaluable.

“And you shouldn’t feel too guilty about what happened with him—I saw that the two of you worked and talked through it together, so I take it that he probably agreed to do it. If he had been resistant and you pushed him anyway, that would be different. Don’t be too hard on yourself; everyone learns from experience. I’ve pushed Mightyena too far—he was so badly poisoned one time that he had a limp for three weeks.”

Maressa started.

Tabitha’s eyes fell. “We fought a Seviper; it had used poison fang, and I knew Mightyena was poisoned, but I didn’t realize just how badly it poisons Pokemon. I had him keep fighting, the Seviper kept poisoning him with fangs and tail until Mightyena was practically sweating out toxins.”

Tabitha was silent; his dark eyes fixed on the desk. But somehow, the silence wasn’t totally uncomfortable. Grabbing a tissue, she wiped her eyes clean while Tabitha mulled over the past.

“Anyway,” he said as he roused himself from his reverie. “I didn’t just want to talk about battling.” Picking up a few papers off his desk, he held them out to Maressa. "Know what these are?"

She took a stapled set of papers and her eyes scanned the familiar structure: Abstract, Keywords, Introduction, Methods, Results, Conclusion, Discussion.

"It's a scientific research paper."

"Look at the writers and the journal."

The authors' names were completely unfamiliar to Maressa—but her eyes followed the asterisks next to their names she saw their affiliations. Hoenn Reef Conservation Coalition. Devon Corporation. She glanced at the journal name in the corner: Ecology. She rifled quickly through the paper. Nothing looked out of the ordinary to her—it studied the effect of water flow and sedimentation on Hoenn's western reefs, listing human activities as direct causes of the reef's decline. She glanced at Tabitha, who stared at her expectantly.

"I've never heard of the people. But I know it's a big journal—and the tests were carried out by Hoenn’s government."

"What do you think of the paper's contents?"

He eyes narrowed. "It affirms exactly what I've been telling you."

"You think so? Look at their Methods and how they did it."

She frowned—part of her wanted to refuse, but at this point she was curious enough to take a look for herself. "A group of scientists had laid transects at different areas all along Hoenn's western shore," she concluded. She looked back up at Tabitha. "So?"

"Think about it. Doesn't anything seem off about the way they did it?"

"No."

He gazed at her for a moment before grabbing another set of stapled papers and handing it to her. "Take a look at this."

The paper looked much rougher and more unrefined than the previous one; watermarks filled the page backgrounds and every line was denoted by a different number. The pages were double-spaced, the text wasn't formatted. Her eyes skimmed the abstract—it was a review of the previous paper.

"The Hoenn Reef Conservation's analyses had low statistical power and lacked proper planning. There is currently insufficient evidence to say that human actions are direct influencers of Hoenn reef decline."


Maressa started. Low statistical power? She hadn't thought of that—she rifled through the paper and looked at their methods.

"Transects were laid out randomly along thousands of kilometers of coastline. No differentiation between the transects was noted. This could lead to confounding errors between transects that lie by urbanized areas and those that lie by areas sparsely inhabited by humans.

"The analyses failed to take into conclusion mudslides and rockfalls that took place on September 14, 2002 and December 8, 2002, respectively. Failure to account for the magnitude of these events and their contribution to sedimentation greatly confounds the results."


Maressa's heart twisted.

None of it was true?

Well, that might not be the case—it could be true that humans directly caused main environmental decline. But... Perhaps it was possible that they did not cause decline.

"Then what does?"

Tabitha tilted his head.

"If humans aren't causing the decline, then what is killing the reefs? How can it be anything but us? And even if this one paper is refuted, there are literally hundreds of others that have plenty of proof!"

“Do you realize why I showed you that paper?" Tabitha asked calmly while Maressa hastily rifled through the report.

"To try and prove me wrong," she growled.

"No." He picked up two more papers, both of which looked refined, edited, completed. "Here is a paper stating that humans have not caused environmental impacts in rainforests, and here is another paper refuting the previous one and calling out the problems with its evidence." He put the papers down and gazed critically at Maressa. "The two reasons why I showed you that paper are because it calls into account the issues with statistical power of the previous paper and because this paper was never published."

"It was never published? If it's useless and proven untrue, why would you look at it?"

"It's not useless," he said quietly. "Look at the people who wrote it."

Maressa's eyes skimmed the authors and their affiliations. As before, the author names were completely alien to her, but the credentials included Hoenn Institute of Technology and Architecture and Petalburg Centre for Ecology and Conservation.

The sight of her alma mater made Maressa's heart skip a beat.

These were credible people, then. Why couldn't this paper be published?

"I'm not sure how familiar you are with the scientific world, but before research reports are released for the public, they are heavily screened and edited. The people at the top decide what gets published—what the mainstream media picks up on, and what every day people get to see."

As Maressa listened to his words, heaviness slowly settled into her heart like a stone in water.

"The editors of the journal Ecology didn't want people finding out that humans weren't responsible for reef decline. They don't want to shatter the fantasy that humans are inherently evil, that we destroy the natural environment with the comfort of our lives, that we are responsible for every natural disaster that happens."

"Just because they covered that up doesn't mean humans aren't responsible," Maressa interjected.

Tabitha took another paper—from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Science group—and showed it to her. "See these charts? How they show a direct correlation between increasing storms and human activity over the past 50 years?" Without waiting for an answer, he showed Maressa another paper, one she had never seen before—her blood turned cold.

The paper showed charts for an increase in human population over the past three hundred years and recorded storm activity. When zoomed out to the time Hoenn started recording storms in the early 1700's, the chart showed a particularly low point for storm frequency fifty years ago—and it was just returning to normal.

"It's like that with many papers, Maressa."

She looked at Tabitha, the dread of realization rendering her mute.

“I’m not saying we know for sure that humans aren’t causing problems with the natural environment—I know that the opposite is true. Look outside and watch rampant deforestation, construction, depletion of aquifers, the growing number of sinkholes—all of that is directly tied to the activities of humans. I agree with you in that we know that human actions do, indeed, cause problems.

“But small problems like that will never be reported on. It’s always the big problems on a grandiose scale, far too large for any one human to do something about. And if every human knows that, as an individual, he’s helpless, what is he left to do?”

He gazed at Maressa expectantly for a moment—it took her a minute to realize the question was not rhetorical.

“If we’re all helpless to do something? Well… Work together as a group, right?”

“And who organizes that group? Who directs it? Who tells it what to do?”

“Are you talking about Team Aqua?”

“No, I mean for everyday people living their lives as self-proclaimed ‘environmentalists.’ People who live as a gear in the machine of society. Who do they listen to? Who do they obey?”

“The… government, I suppose?”

He smiled. “Exactly.”

She stared blankly at him. “So, the government is trying to get people to fight for the environment?”

“That’s what people think—it’s the narrative they push. But, in reality, they don’t care. They want people to hand over their freedoms to them, to willingly look to the governing body as their savior, to have the government provide them with every solution, to create a sense of powerlessness in the individuals. The government wants to control its people, and that’s why they claim there are problems that are too big for people to handle. If they really did care about the natural world, they would practice what they preach. They wouldn’t fly on private jets or ships all the time. They wouldn’t rampantly waste fresh water or destroy forests. They would instead encourage people to build relationships with Pokemon, to understand and live alongside Pokemon in their natural habitats—not capture them, fill them with drugs to make them become as powerful as they can and raise them as tools for battling.

“This was never about the environment, Maressa.”

Maressa stared wide-eyed back at Tabitha, who gazed at her coldly. She wanted to fight back, to refute what he said—but she agreed with a lot of what he said.

“But… but this is what Team Aqua thinks, too!”

Tabitha tilted his head slightly. “You didn’t seem aware of faulty government-conducted experiments until just now.”

“I…”

Maressa tore her eyes away—she had to think clearly—but as she put together what Tabitha said with what she knew on Team Aqua, it felt as if pieces were missing.

“Commander Shelly used to work for Devon!” she blurted out.

Tabitha smiled. “Yes, she did. And?”

The more she tried to put the story together, the more confused she was. Shelly used to work for Devon. Shelly quit Devon. Devon put out published papers saying human action was destroying the natural environment. Team Aqua believed humans were destroying the environment. That all fit together—

But why did Shelly quit Devon?

Mickey had said that Shelly didn’t like the people there or the work they were doing—but it sounded like Devon was doing exactly what Team Aqua wanted. So just what was it?

Tabitha watched Maressa’s internal struggle for a minute.

“Team Aqua tells you that the environment is on the brink of collapsing and that the government gives all the evidence for environmental catastrophe. But they won’t do anything about it—because environmental restoration isn’t what they want. Team Magma knows that the government is lying and just wants people to willingly give up their freedom so that they can have more control over individuals’ lives.

“You’ve seen evidence for yourself, Maressa. What do you think?”

Maressa’s eyes dropped to her knees. What did she think? She knew Team Aqua—or at least, she thought she did. Would they actually lie to their teammates and use them to summon a rain-god to control the seas?

“It’s ridiculous,” she mused. Raising her eyes, she glared at Tabitha, who watched her patiently. “I know Team Aqua, and we care about our oceans. They don’t actually believe in an ancient god that summons rain, and they wouldn’t use saving the oceans as an excuse to find and control a mythological figure!”

Tabitha responded to her fire with a cold smile. “You say you know Team Aqua, do you? Let me ask you this: were Shelly or Matt with you on that submarine?”

“That doesn’t concern you.”

“I didn’t see them, so I’ll take that as a ‘no.’ Do you know what would have happened to you if they were there? Do you think they would actually leave your body behind? Or do you think they wouldn’t at least try to cover their tracks?”

A chill shot through Maressa’s heart. “Cover their tracks?”

Tabitha nodded. “Make sure there’s no one left behind who can disseminate information about them. ‘Leave no survivors.’ ”

Icicles speared Maressa’s heart as she stared at Tabitha in horror.

He was no longer smiling. “Your commanders wouldn’t have just left you there, Maressa. They would have tried to save you—or, if they believed you were beyond saving, they would have made sure your body was unsalvageable.”

Maressa stuttered, stumbling over her words—she had to say something—had to refute his words!

“That can’t be true! And what about Team Magma? Wouldn’t you do just the same thing?”

Tabitha gazed at her for a moment before responding. “If you do go back to Team Aqua, I suggest you ask them. Ask Shelly about working for Devon and why she quit. Commanders love it when their subordinates show interest in what they do. And if you do climb the ranks, ask them what’s expected when a team member is in danger of falling behind.”

Maressa blinked. Asking these questions sounded like perfectly reasonable things to do—they wouldn’t muddy the waters, like she thought Tabitha had wanted.

“Why are you telling me this?”

He smiled. “I want you to know the truth. And I want you to do well.

“Anyway, I’ve given you a bit to think on, so I’ll let you go for now. We’ll talk again soon. And I hope you have your answer ready.” He stood up to go—

“And what will happen to me if I say no?”

He looked down at Maressa. She stared up at him, utterly confused and disheartened.

“If you reject my offer to join Team Magma? It’ll be as you said—you’ll be useful for bargaining. And I’m sure you’ll have information about Team Aqua that would be useful to us,” he said with a soft smile.

He escorted Maressa back to the infirmary. She sat on her bed, Tabitha’s words running through her mind, ripping her heart into little pieces that did not fit together; pieces that fell into a senseless jumble.

It was never about the environment.

Was that true? How could that be true? She had to get back to Team Aqua—she had to talk to Shelly. That may be the only way to discover the truth. Maybe everything Tabitha had told her was a giant lie. That would certainly fit with his reputation as a Team Magma member.

But there was a fear that he was maybe, just maybe, telling the truth. And the more Maressa dwelled on it, the more palpable that fear became. And the concept of “covering their tracks”…

Maressa closed her eyes and lay back on her bed, feeling more lost and lonely than before.
 
Last edited:

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
Responding to, uh, your responses and will come back for the chapter itself soon.

I've had... various things going on with my family members in real life lately and it's taken my mind out of fanfiction. I'll get around to reviewing the latest chapter of Continental Divides soon!
Yeah things are INTENSE in the world right now. Please take care of yourself. Also—no worries there because I think you did comment on the most recent Divides, unless im misremembering.

I like that you noticed this in your fic and changed his gender entirely lol
🙃 It’s that and ... I got so excited about original characters that they’ve started to take real-estate from canon characters. For example, Mark in Divides covers too much the same niche that canon Tabitha would, but I feel like lady!Tabitha offers me something different.

I had always imagined with newspapers and book scans etc.
Professor Tabitha, keeping office hours. 😉

so I'm just going to stay quiet about this right now and let you see you end up feeling about him :)
Haha, fair enough! I’ll definitely let you know.

I tried to make him stoic and not very expressive
Oh, sure. I can see that, and I think that fits. Even so, no one can completely control their emotions, in my opinion. Just a flicker of something in his expression could say a lot, even if Maressa isn’t sure whether she imagined it.

She meant she doesn't have other jobs lined up in terms of "nowhere else to go;" she's on good terms with her family
Ohhh I gotcha. That would be a good spot to clarify then.

Oh, yeah, I should probably clarify it to make it apparent that it's the former. She's intimidated by Tabitha, not attracted to him
Thank goodness, honestly. That would be a lot in this moment.

Heh, I'm not super impressed with myself for how I handle them, since I wanted this story to primarily be about grunts. But they will appear!
I think that works though! Because the focus is on the grunts, it makes Maxie and Archie feel far away and larger-than life.

Looking forward to coming back for the new chapter soon. My brain is mush and all I want to do is read.
 
Last edited:

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
I didn’t expect you to open with a Derek perspective, but I thought that scene worked really well. Might be one my favorite in the fic so far. We’ve gotten a few other perspectives, but this is the first time we’ve gotten to see Maressa from the outside.

It’s easy, and what else are you going to spend your time doing?
...
Oh, that’s just Claydol.
Seems like Magma, similarly to Aqua, has a little bit of a problem with how it treats its pokémon. It’s clear that this is banter ... but it is also dismissive.

“He’s beautiful…”
...
“I know Breloom’s a fighter, but what about you? Do you like to battle, or would you rather stay on the sidelines?”
Maressa, by contrast, seems much more empathetic to pokémon, and there seems to be a link between that attitude and her battling skill. I also liked that Derek was savvy enough to put together that she’s responding this way because she misses her own pokemon.

tried teaching my Pokemon calculus,
Woah, this really raises some questions about pokemon intelligence. Like, did she try teaching them algebra first and working her way up because she cares about their education? Or was this the equivalent of her nerding out because she was just that excited about math and wanted to talk to them about it? Sounds more like the second, but it also sounds like she has at least some hope they might pick it up—and I can’t decide if I think that’s naive of her or an indication that pokemon are quite sapient. Makes Aqua and Magma’s dismissal of pokemon even more striking.

went to the Hoenn Institute of Technology and Architecture.”
Oh wow, so she’s very bright. Sounds like she should be able to work in a lot of places—I still have questions about why she saw Aqua as an option, because surely other places also could’ve paid, right?

studied at the Johto Technological and Medical Institution.”

“Did you go to med school?”
Interesting—so he’s not local? Or he left for school and came back? Very curious about that.

I do like the idea that, for folks who fell short, working for Magma and Aqua feels like a viable option. Not finishing a program comes with shame and financial burden. These groups offer purpose and pay. I loved how you pulled in student debt as a real pressure that they both deal with. Big oof.

you’re in the same boat as I am.”
I see what you did there.

I don’t think I could ever be comfortable with appearing on TV and being famous or anything.
Yeah, a life of crime is the opposite in many ways—you definitely don’t want to be seen at that work.

“ ‘When you joined’ them, you heard that?
You put quotes within quotes in a couple places here, and I found it distracting from the flow of the dialogue. Especially in the above example where he’s not actually quoting her directly but paraphrasing—he’s plugged in “you” where she used “I.” I’d consider using italics instead.

but I just thought it was because I was a low-ranking member and that I would be told more the longer I worked with them.
I still feel like I don’t have a satisfying answer to what made her trust them. Even if she expects to learn more later ... there has to be something to make her feel okay with waiting for later to come around, even if it’s something as small and biased as knowing and trusting someone who was involved already.

That is what your team is doing.
I feel like that “is” wants to be italicized for emphasis.

He did not believe that creating more land would be bad for the planet—all scientific models pointing to that were just theoretic, after all—
Huh. I struggle with this a little. Even if he didn’t complete his degree, he was in med school. He definitely knows how to read a scientific study And knows to respect those studies—and surely they include at least some concrete, observable phenomena.

Doesn’t the path to completing your goal matter just as much as the completion itself?”
👀

Ignoring the Pokemon as he blinked his several eyes in confusion, he turned to Maressa.
I was confused which part was Derek and which part was the claydol on the first read.

We need to get back to work,” he said, ignoring the Pokemon’s protestant rumblings.
The repetition here was a little odd. Maybe it would’ve worked better if it has been clearer that claydol protested or resisted (maybe leaning in for more pets from Maressa?) the first time he said it and he repeated himself to lay down the line.

Derek started. “You mean Crazy Courtney? Why are you calling her?”
This felt a little off—if it’s known that she’s also an admin, there could be LOTS of reasons for Tabitha to call her. Might ring truer for me if it were less “why call her?” and more of an uneasy “she’s not coming here, is she?” If she’s the go-to “interrogator,” there must be some nasty rumors about her.

This also reminds me of the role she plays in Wolflyn’s fic “Deal with the Devil.” You reading it?

We’ve captured a few Team Aqua members and one scientist that we needed information from.”
This felt a little stilted, especially since it sounds like it’s new information for Derek. Might be more useful to have Tabitha wave him away, obfuscate, or change the subject.

Maxie says that he prefers Courtney to handle interrogations,
Why is that? I am getting the impression that it’s just an excuse for him not to have to dirty his own hands, but it also seems like these are genuinely Maxie’s orders?

Whatever she wants. I usually don’t watch, but I know she likes to get her Ninetales to help her.”

“If we’re going to hurt Maressa, why have you been having me treat her?”
I really wanted more emotional reactions from both of them here! Again, it seems like Tabitha isn’t really comfortable with it, despite his blustering to Maressa, and that his body language or tone might show it. Even if he is cold as ice, Derek definitely isn’t, and we need some kind of reaction from him here.

Unless there’s something you can do to her to make her stop recovering, I didn’t see any other options.”
This was a little hard to parse.

Some of the teammates were having a party and I confiscated them.
This was a little confusing. Is this ... not literal soda? Is that a euphemism for something harder? But it’s for pokemon only? Or humans and pokémon? I know you’re pulling from the game canon, but in this context it’s a little odd.

Also “the teammates” is a little stiff. Doesn’t feel like how real people on a team talk about each other, and it also doesn’t paint a very strong picture of how Tabitha is interacting with them. He confiscated their ... beverages ... so he can’t be too chummy, but if that’s the case I’d expect a more specific, colder word there. Squadron B or something, maybe. The stealth unit.

her body growing tenser with anticipation every waking moment. Were it not for her overall weariness caused by the gash in her leg, she didn’t think she’d be able to sleep.
I’d cut “from the gash in her leg”—goes without saying. Does make much wonder how much pain she’s in though! In the first part of this passage, I was wishing for more specifics. Later where you describe her jumping at footsteps in the hall, I thought it was a much better, more grounded indication of her mental state. Might help to get some verbatim thoughts from her here! What words or images is she fixating on?

I gain weight like crazy if I’m not actively working out.”

Derek smiled skeptically as glanced at Maressa’s trim, athletically-fit form. “I’m sure you don’t.”
Aha, I see what’s happening now.

This passage did less for me than the first scene where they talked about school. Here, it feels like we’re leaning on a stereotype about Things Girls Care About that feels like it should be low on her list of priorities. In the other scene, we could see them connecting over shared experience, which was much more meaningful.

As this thought came to his mind, he saw a bunch of faceless, blue-clad people and Water-type Pokemon attack a small base in the depths of the rainforest.
This was just non-specific enough that I was confused. Is this where they are currently or another specific base he’s worried about?

Unsure of how to approach the topic, he decided to get into a comfort zone. Snapping on some gloves, he bent down and started to examine the wound in her leg.
I liked the sentiment that he’d lean on a medical encounter as a segway into a tough conversation. However, it felt like a weird invasion of her privacy to start touching her without asking while she’s asleep, especially since they’re becoming friends. I’d rather see him wake her up on the pretense of changing her bandages—gives her a way to consent, and gives us a moment of additional guilt from him for waking her up.

So I’ve decided to help you make it back to Team Aqua, and to make sure that they’ll still trust you and won’t think that you’ve turned spy for Team Magma, I’ll give you some information about us that you can give to them.
I’m not totally sold on this plan. I’d find it more realistic that he’d try to help her escape on the condition that she didn’t rejoin with Aqua or that she personally wouldn’t fight Magma. What he does ask her to promise is ... hard to measure, and he must know how little power she’d have to enforce it.

What would be my punishment—that I’m not allowed to heal their Pokemon anymore? No, the worse they would do is dock some of my pay. Even if it’s my fault that you escaped, I don’t think they would stop paying me completely.”
His decision to help her would mean so much more if it felt like he did have something to risk!

Unless you planned on attacking Team Aqua the moment you had captured that team member,
I was confused here.

and some haven’t even done Pokemon battles before!
“Done battles” hits my ear wrong. Had battles, maybe. Been in battles. Or even battled.

he wanted business done and was wasting time listening to Courtney when he could be doing work.
I kinda see where he’s coming from here, except that her grievances sound legitimate. They’re not well-staffed or equipped, it sounds like, which he’s bemoaning too a few paragraphs later. As he should—that’s a dangerous position to be in. If you’re going against the law, you’d better be sure you can trust the people around you to back you.

The page detailed aspects of the Millennium Comet, which was last sighted in the early 1000’s. The time of year for the Comet to appear was rapidly approaching; every year around this time, Maxie grew anxious—it had to appear soon.
Very Fire Lord Ozai.

If only more people on our team had Pokemon that could fight that well.
Why is it so hard for them to find good trainers? Is it that good trainers are rare or that good trainers aren’t attracted to their mission?

Tabitha lay down next to Mightyena. His heart ached. He hoped the Team Magma would accomplish their goal soon and all this fighting could end.
I feel like I’m supposed to feel sympathy for him here more than I do. If we’re gonna focus on him in this scene, I’d love a moment of internal conflict or vulnerability from him. Rolling his eyes about Courtney didn’t scratch that itch for me.

Guess next chapter it’ll be time for Maressa’s big escape! Will be interesting see what Derek has in mind and how she’s affected by her injury.
 

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
Yeah things are INTENSE in the world right now. Please take care of yourself. Also—no worries there because I think you did comment on the most recent Divides, unless im misremembering.
Things in my life are actually unrelated to what you're probably talking about; it's just health conditions appearing suddenly in my family members that we don't yet know how serious they are, so maybe everyone will be okay, and maybe not. My sister's family was threatened and robbed so they're preparing to move (they don't live in Hong Kong or the US, so it's not related to the riots or violence happening in those places). But thanks for the affirmation. I'm going to try to keep to my every-other-week update and I think I should be able to, but if not... Well, that's probably why lol

[🙃 It’s that and ... I got so excited about original characters that they’ve started to take real-estate from canon characters. For example, Mark in Divides covers too much the same niche that canon Tabitha would, but I feel like lady!Tabitha offers me something different.
Ooohhh neat! Haha I find it a bit annoying when I came up with an idea forr an OC and that same idea gets used later for canon characters ._. But I'll have to check lady!Tabitha out!


Thank goodness, honestly. That would be a lot in this moment.
Oh yeah lol I've never tried writing affection/attraction or romance and tbh I'm not at all confident enough to really try.

I think that works though! Because the focus is on the grunts, it makes Maxie and Archie feel far away and larger-than life.
That's the idea! They're the big guys surrounded by little people--and I've always been more interested in the little people.

And WOW you have a lot to say about the chapter. I appreciate it! My first thought about seeing such big posts is always to feel intimidated lolol so let's see how this goes.

Maressa, by contrast, seems much more empathetic to pokémon, and there seems to be a link between that attitude and her battling skill. I also liked that Derek was savvy enough to put together that she’s responding this way because she misses her own pokemon.


Woah, this really raises some questions about pokemon intelligence. Like, did she try teaching them algebra first and working her way up because she cares about their education? Or was this the equivalent of her nerding out because she was just that excited about math and wanted to talk to them about it? Sounds more like the second, but it also sounds like she has at least some hope they might pick it up—and I can’t decide if I think that’s naive of her or an indication that pokemon are quite sapient. Makes Aqua and Magma’s dismissal of pokemon even more striking.
I like how you pick up on these things! Maressa's Pokemon are definitely the most important beings in her life. She tried teaching them about math because, as you said, she was nerding out and was just that excited about it and wanted to share with her best friends something that made her happy. I don't ever think of Pokemon as less intelligent than humans, but intelligent in a different way--they have much more animalistic instincts and don't care about things like math and it's not something that all of them would be able to comprehend.

The Teams are sometimes a bit hypocritical when it comes to their treatment of Pokemon--some definitely love and treat their Pokemon with respect but others only see them as tools. It's something I didn't intentionally explore at the time, but I think just kinda came out subconsciously in my writing.

Interesting—so he’s not local? Or he left for school and came back? Very curious about that.
I wrote this in mind with him being from Johto. Thinking about it, he has two Pokemon exclusive to Hoenn... I need to think more on that. But originally I meant for him to be from Johto lololol

Oh wow, so she’s very bright. Sounds like she should be able to work in a lot of places—I still have questions about why she saw Aqua as an option, because surely other places also could’ve paid, right?

I do like the idea that, for folks who fell short, working for Magma and Aqua feels like a viable option. Not finishing a program comes with shame and financial burden. These groups offer purpose and pay. I loved how you pulled in student debt as a real pressure that they both deal with. Big oof.
It's one of those things where real life contrasts with what schools tell their students; I know several people who graduated from prestigious schools and had a hard time finding work and figuring out what to do. Maressa studied math because she loves it and graduated with it but didn't have a sort of career in mind when she finished school. Team Aqua sounded good to her, so she went with it though it didn't turn out to be what she expected.

And yeah, schools definitely impose a big financial burden. I'd be lying if I said I didn't know the feel hahaaaaaaa

I
see what you did there.
LOLLLLLLL I burst out laughing because I didn't even think about that.

You put quotes within quotes in a couple places here, and I found it distracting from the flow of the dialogue. Especially in the above example where he’s not actually quoting her directly but paraphrasing—he’s plugged in “you” where she used “I.” I’d consider using italics instead.
Good to know! I struggle using punctuation and wording that doesn't come off too clunky so I appreciate the tip!

I still feel like I don’t have a satisfying answer to what made her trust them. Even if she expects to learn more later ... there has to be something to make her feel okay with waiting for later to come around, even if it’s something as small and biased as knowing and trusting someone who was involved already.
Fair enough. It was born partly out of desperation on her part, both for having financial security and feeling affirmed at knowing she CAN do something. I have heard a lot that her motives at the beginning are not clear, so I appreciate this!

I feel like that “is” wants to be italicized for emphasis.
Ha, pretty sure I originally italicized that. Must've slipped by. Thanks for the catch!

Huh. I struggle with this a little. Even if he didn’t complete his degree, he was in med school. He definitely knows how to read a scientific study And knows to respect those studies—and surely they include at least some concrete, observable phenomena.
Fair; I've been in science for a long time and have read many papers, and I come across weird things that sound like complete nonsense being published and put out. Science also follows money--whatever is funded gets researched and published. Derek isn't a flat-earther but he's definitely skeptical of these things, along with the rest of his team.

I was confused which part was Derek and which part was the claydol on the first read.
Sorry lol I hoped that the "several eyes" would have given Claydol away but I concede that the grammar is confusing.

The repetition here was a little odd. Maybe it would’ve worked better if it has been clearer that claydol protested or resisted (maybe leaning in for more pets from Maressa?) the first time he said it and he repeated himself to lay down the line.

This felt a little off—if it’s known that she’s also an admin, there could be LOTS of reasons for Tabitha to call her. Might ring truer for me if it were less “why call her?” and more of an uneasy “she’s not coming here, is she?” If she’s the go-to “interrogator,” there must be some nasty rumors about her.

This also reminds me of the role she plays in Wolflyn’s fic “Deal with the Devil.” You reading it?
Ah, good point. And no, I have not! But it sounds like I should :D

Why is that? I am getting the impression that it’s just an excuse for him not to have to dirty his own hands, but it also seems like these are genuinely Maxie’s orders?
Bit of both; in the original, Courtney teased Tabitha about how he refused to hurt women. But also a flaw on Maxie's part in over-delegating something to a specific person.

This was a little confusing. Is this ... not literal soda? Is that a euphemism for something harder? But it’s for pokemon only? Or humans and pokémon? I know you’re pulling from the game canon, but in this context it’s a little odd.

Also “the teammates” is a little stiff. Doesn’t feel like how real people on a team talk about each other, and it also doesn’t paint a very strong picture of how Tabitha is interacting with them. He confiscated their ... beverages ... so he can’t be too chummy, but if that’s the case I’d expect a more specific, colder word there. Squadron B or something, maybe. The stealth unit.
Oh, ha. This referred to a one-shot I wrote for a contest way back when where Tabitha shuts down a crazy party the Magma grunts were having and confiscates all their alcohol and pop. I guess it doesn't make much sense on its own tho lol. Tbh I'm not sure what the stuff in the game is, whether it's literal soda pop or a special Pokemon supplement. I haven't thought too much about it, but I feel like it makes for interesting ideas. And I like the suggestion for him to use a different term; it would be a very Tabitha thing to do.

This was just non-specific enough that I was confused. Is this where they are currently or another specific base he’s worried about?
He was imagining another base he knew about and was scared about it being run over

I liked the sentiment that he’d lean on a medical encounter as a segway into a tough conversation. However, it felt like a weird invasion of her privacy to start touching her without asking while she’s asleep, especially since they’re becoming friends. I’d rather see him wake her up on the pretense of changing her bandages—gives her a way to consent, and gives us a moment of additional guilt from him for waking her up.
Ohhhh true. I'm so stupid to forget about asking for consent >_< Whoops

I’m not totally sold on this plan. I’d find it more realistic that he’d try to help her escape on the condition that she didn’t rejoin with Aqua or that she personally wouldn’t fight Magma. What he does ask her to promise is ... hard to measure, and he must know how little power she’d have to enforce it.

His decision to help her would mean so much more if it felt like he did have something to risk!
Maressa would go back either way for her Pokemon--Derek asking her not to would just add more dialogue that I don't think (?) would be totally necessary. And while it's hard to measure and can easily go wrong, Derek is someone who's willing to try if it means helping out a woman he doesn't see much guilt in. And true lol but if he doesn't have to risk anything more than he already is, why should he? :P

I was confused here.
He didn't immediately capture Team Aqua member-->interrogate her-->attack Team Magma bases.

I kinda see where he’s coming from here, except that her grievances sound legitimate. They’re not well-staffed or equipped, it sounds like, which he’s bemoaning too a few paragraphs later. As he should—that’s a dangerous position to be in. If you’re going against the law, you’d better be sure you can trust the people around you to back you.
Sure; Tabitha's just not always the best at listening and isn't a very patient person when it comes to Courtney

Very Fire Lord Ozai.
LOL also did not think of that. I've seen Avatar the Last Airbender like... once or twice? Maybe it slipped into my subconscious and is affecting me, heh.

Why is it so hard for them to find good trainers? Is it that good trainers are rare or that good trainers aren’t attracted to their mission?
They're a criminal organization and a lot of their members are not much better than thieves; finding people who are good, ethical fighters isn't easy for them.

I feel like I’m supposed to feel sympathy for him here more than I do. If we’re gonna focus on him in this scene, I’d love a moment of internal conflict or vulnerability from him. Rolling his eyes about Courtney didn’t scratch that itch for me.
Fair enough. I changed this scene from the original, which might have been a better ending tbh. And this won't be the last you see of Tabitha so give him time :)

Guess next chapter it’ll be time for Maressa’s big escape! Will be interesting see what Derek has in mind and how she’s affected by her injury.
Ohohoh we'll definitely see. Thanks again for reviewing! I appreciate it and for your kind words :)
 

WildBoots

Don’t underestimate seeds.
Pronouns
She/Her
Partners
  1. moka-mark
  2. solrock
Hey, doesn’t matter the source. Real life is real life, and it makes its demands. Wishing you the best with everything you have going on all the same.

But I'll have to check lady!Tabitha out!
Sadly, haven’t finished writing her scenes yet. So ... no rush, lol.

lol I've never tried writing affection/attraction or romance
Ha! Oh man, then I apologize! I’m clearly projecting. That’s a weight off, though, and I can rest easy and stop side-eyeing Tabitha.

My first thought about seeing such big posts is always to feel intimidated lolol so let's see how this goes.
Haha, sorry! Don’t mean to come off a scary. I’m just channeling all my creative energy into reviews today.

The Teams are sometimes a bit hypocritical when it comes to their treatment of Pokemon
Oh, for sure, as real people so often are.

But originally I meant for him to be from Johto lololol
It’s totally possible That he started training after he relocated! Implies a less sturdy bond with his team though if it’s more recent. (Maybe fits with Claydol!) I’m curious how he got involved with Magma from way out there though, especially subcritical I’ve got a similar challenge with Mark in Divides coming from Unova. I’ve got some ideas for my setting, but I’m curious what your thought process was like here.

I know several people who graduated from prestigious schools and had a hard time finding work and figuring out what to do.
THAT I can get behind, but you need a little bit more for me to get that from the text.

I've been in science for a long time and have read many papers, and I come across weird things that sound like complete nonsense being published and put out. Science also follows money--whatever is funded gets researched and published.
That’s fair—is he suspicious that Devon or someone is funding those studies then? Might lend more credibility to his ... incredulity, lol.

He was imagining another base he knew about and was scared about it being run over
Ah, then I think a little more specific language would help pull us into his thoughts a little more and make it feel more tangible. As it reads right now, I couldn’t tell if he was being hypothetical.

Maressa would go back either way for her Pokemon
Oh, of course. We know that. But he might not. IDK, just another idea.

finding people who are good, ethical fighters isn't easy for them.
Ah but do they really need ethical fighters? 👀
 
Chapter 7

Starlight Aurate

Ad Jesum per Mariam | pfp by kintsugi
Location
Route 123
Partners
  1. mightyena
  2. psyduck
Hi everyone! Here's the next chapter. Hope you all enjoy! ^_^



Chapter 7




“Breloom-Breloom-BREEEEEE!”

“Cut it out!”

Derek trudged down the hallway as Breloom hopped excitedly about him, chirping non-stop.

This was NOT a wonderful day! He was tired of being at sea and he wanted to be in a forest. Maybe a grassland—no, a jungle would be best! A jungle with plenty of water, good for growing fungus—and lots of other Grass-type Pokemon! He did NOT like the salt and wind and water and coldness that always hung about outside. It was miserable! And Claydol and Golbat hated it, too. When would they get to go to a REAL place?

“I don’t know,” Derek said sympathetically. “I know you guys aren’t suited to the water—I know it’s hard. Hopefully, we’ll just do this for a bit and then we’ll be on solid ground again for a while. Okay?”

He closed the infirmary door behind him as Breloom immediately hopped over to Maressa’s bed. Derek heard him chirp—was Maressa okay?

Derek glanced—she lay propped up on her pillows, her hands resting on her navel as she stared at the blank ceiling. Her amber eyes fixed on a spot above her but shone with a glassy contour as she only observed the contents of her mind.

“Are you okay?”

Maressa jolted—shaking her head, her blonde tresses spilled over her shoulders. She blinked several times before her eyes rested on Derek and roved away again.

“Hm? Oh—yeah, I’m—I’m okay…”

The discomfort was palpable. Part of Derek felt a bit rude for asking a personal question, but he knew that being direct and clear was the easiest approach.

“So, yeah, uh… talked with Tabitha yesterday, didn’t you?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Everything go okay? He—nothing bad happened—right?”

“I’m not hurt or anything, and he didn’t threaten me—I just…” She shook her head. “I don’t know what to think anymore.”

Derek gingerly sat down on the bed across from Maressa. “Would it help to talk about it?”

“Tabitha isn’t always honest—is he? He’s a commander! He would just do whatever is most effective—whatever makes his job easiest for him—right?”

She sat bolt upright, her mouth hanging open slightly as she stared at Derek with pleading desperation.

Derek’s heart twisted. If he cared about her well-being, he wouldn’t tell her whatever she wanted to hear.

“That’s not entirely true,” he said slowly. “Tabitha is a very effective commander, but that’s because he’s strong enough to make good on any threats and smart enough to work with the people under him. But he’s honest—sometimes to a fault. He’s scared new recruits several times before. He tells the grunts to not party after 8 PM—he once caught them partying late into the night, canceled their mission and had the group stay up the entire night and day cleaning the base from top-to-bottom. And that’s probably the tamest thing he’s ever done.”

Hope died in Maressa’s eyes as she slowly brought her knees to her chest and hugged them. “But… but he doesn’t know Team Aqua… does he?”

Derek shifted. “He knows them better than most other people on this team, at least—he’s worked here for a long time.”

“But… No!” Maressa scrunched her eyes shut. “What he told me—it can’t be true—can it?”

“What did he tell you?”

Maressa buried her head in her knees for a second before responding, “He told me that Team Aqua cares most about its mission—and that its mission was never about the environment. It’s about power and who gets to wield it. That Team Aqua views us—the grunts—as disposable, that if Shelly or Matt saw me dying, they wouldn’t just leave me behind—that they would either do what they could to save me or—or ensure that I was dead first.

“But that can’t be true! I mean… I heard Team Aqua tell its members to ‘cover their tracks’ when they were on a mission and trying to escape notice, and I never knew what that meant—until Tabitha used the exact same phrase. And… and he encouraged me to talk to my Commanders about it—to ask them what those phrases mean, to ask Shelly why she quit working for Devon…” Her eyes darted about the room, looking for an answer that logic refused her. “And he showed me scientific papers—published by the Hoenn government that most of the public believes about environmental degradation. And then he showed me more papers that refuted those studies—papers that weren’t made public—ones that the school I went to released!

“But this can’t be true!”

She looked back at Derek, slightly uncurling her body from its ball-like shape.

“Tabitha is my enemy! He made all this up just to mess with me, to get me to spill information to Team Magma—he doesn’t actually want me on Team Magma—right?”

Derek forced himself to meet her gaze, to not look away—though he desperately wanted to. His heart twisted with guilt and reluctance—it would be so much easier to go to his room and shut the door on this conversation.

“The thing you need to know about Tabitha,” Derek said slowly, “is that he’ll do what he believes is best for Team Magma—for the grunts. If he spends time talking to someone, it’s because he thinks it’ll go somewhere—usually because he thinks he can help that person. And I meant what I said before about his honesty. He doesn’t waste words. If he told you that he wants you on Team Magma, Maressa, then he means it.”

The expression on Maressa’s face settled into a deeper despair—so Derek kept talking before he felt too awkward to stop.

“And he’s told me all this, too. I don’t… know the truth behind Team Aqua—exactly who they are, what they do, or what their values are. But Tabitha is my friend. And from what I know, if Team Aqua believed you were beyond saving, they would have ripped your body apart and made sure there was no chance you would recover.

“And everything he told you about the scientific papers—he told me that, too. That the Hoenn government cares about pushing an agenda. That they care about controlling their people, not helping Pokemon or the environment.”

Maressa recoiled, slowly wrapping her arms around herself again.

“Granted,” Derek said quickly, “this is all I’ve seen and heard from my own time with Team Magma—and it’s why I joined them. I believe that the way Hoenn runs things is wrong; Pokemon are friends, not battling tools. And if Hoenn cared about its people, it would give us more autonomy instead of having set agendas for each person to follow.” He said the last line with a hint of bitterness, thinking about his post-college burn-out. “Team Magma has people at Devon, so we got our reports through there. I don’t exactly know why we have people in Devon, but everything Tabitha has told you so far has been true.”

Maressa looked away from him, her eyes focused on the wall before her as she slowly unfolded her body, laying herself out on the bed and staring up at the blank ceiling while the gears in her head turned.

Maybe this was an opportunity—Derek felt guilty for trying to get to her while she was distressed, but ultimately this was for her own good—right?

“Maressa, I don’t think you should go back to Team Aqua. If Tabitha said you’re welcome on Team Magma, then you really are! We’ll take care of you—it’ll be easier for you.”

“I have to go back.”

She didn’t look at him but kept her gaze on the ceiling.

“My Pokemon are with Team Aqua. I can’t leave them.”

Derek’s heart fell.

“Did… Did Tabitha say anything about that?”

“He said Team Magma could ‘get them’ for me, but…” She shook he head. “I’m not putting my faith in that. My Pokemon are my best friends—I can’t go on without them. And I won’t sit around and hope that someone else can rescue them for me.” Her gaze, hardened with determination, met Derek’s. “They’re my responsibility. And I will not abandon them.”

“Maressa… I really think you should take up Tabitha’s offer to stay with us.”

“I can’t!”

She sat back up, staring at Derek with narrowed eyes of golden fire. “Even if Team Aqua is wrong—even if they don’t care about the environment—I can’t just join Team Magma! I don’t think reducing the ocean is good, I don’t believe in expanding the land—Derek, I have four Water-type Pokemon. This would never help them! And I won’t betray them like that.”

“I’m not saying this because I want Team Magma to succeed—I’m saying this because it’s in your best interest!”

“How—”

“Have you thought about what will happen if you say ‘no’ to Tabitha?”

Maressa stared at Derek for a second. “He said I have information that will be useful—”

“And Team Magma will torture it out of you, Maressa.”

He knew he shouldn’t have said it. Talking to a captive was not a good idea, and telling her information that Tabitha deliberately withheld was bound to get him into trouble. But he didn’t regret this. Maressa needed to know.

She stared back at Derek, the anger in her eyes slowly smoldering back to fear.

“I’m a Team Magma member, Maressa, and I believe that what we’re doing is ultimately the best—but some people on this team aren’t nice. Our Commander Courtney has physically punished our own team members before. And I can only imagine what she’ll do to an enemy like you. Please, Maressa, don’t let it come to that.

Her eyes fell, darting back-and-forth. She turned to face Derek fully with her feet resting on the ground, her hands on the mattress. Her shoulders slumped forward and her mouth hung open slightly. Derek stared at her for a few minutes, hoping—hoping—that she might listen to him.

“Derek… I can’t.”

The word struck his heart like a hammer hitting a nail. She raised her amber eyes to gaze forlornly at him.

“My Pokemon are with Team Aqua. One way or another, I need to get back to them. If I defect to Team Magma, then there’s no way I can get them. I would have to rely on someone else. If I don’t join Team Magma—even if I tell them about Team Aqua—there’s always a chance that I can be with my Pokemon again.”

“Maressa, it’s okay to rely on others!”

“On people I don’t know or trust?”

“You’ve already done so much—you take care of your Pokemon, you’ve commanded your coworkers on Team Aqua—this time, just let us take care of you! We’ll see to your needs and we’ll retrieve your Pokemon for you!”

She shook her head. “I know you’re trying to help me, Derek, but I can’t do that.”

Derek wrung his hands. If Maressa believed everything Tabitha and Derek told her and still refused to join...

“Then what are you going to do?”

Maressa shook her head. “I don’t know.”

“You know all this about Team Aqua and you still want to work for them?”

“No, I… If this isn’t about the environment—if Team Aqua won’t actually try to save our oceans—then I can’t keep working for them. I can’t work for someone who thinks I’m disposable, who would throw my life away…” She opened her eyes. “I just want to live a normal life again. I had always known that Team Aqua was illegal—but I never thought of it as a life of crime. Not until now, at least.”

Silence descended on the duo like a blanket. Derek fiddled with his thumbs as he stared at the blank metal floor, his mind whirring as he played out different solutions.

“If you don’t consider yourself a Team Aqua member anymore,” he said slowly, “then I might be able to help you.”

Maressa jerked her head up, staring at him wide-eyed.

“You said it yourself—you won’t work for them anymore. So, if I help you out of here, then I’m not helping Team Aqua and I’m not actually betraying Team Magma."

Right?

“Really?”

He looked up. Maressa gazed at him, her eyes shining with hope, a small smile on her face as she leaned forward.

“Yes. And if you make your way back to Team Aqua, you’ll need to prove that Team Magma didn’t release you and that you’re infiltrating—so I’ll give you a bit of information about us that you can relay to your team.”

Maressa leaned farther forward, the smile on her face growing larger.

“You’ll really help me? Even with the trouble you’ll get in?”

“I’m not going to tell anyone!”

“I’m your responsibility."

He waved a hand. “My Pokemon and I will think of something. And it’s like you said: I can’t just sit here and be complacent when I know Team Magma is actively hurting someone. So, I’ll get you out to prevent it from happening.

“But you must promise me that you will leave Team Aqua for good. Promise me you’ll be careful with the information I give you, that Team Aqua won’t cause any permanent damage to our bases.”

“I promise!”

Releasing a large sigh, Maressa sank back onto her pillows. Anxiety and fear were replaced with a weary calm. She looked up at Derek with half-closed eyes and a small smile.

“Thank you, Derek—for everything.”

++++++++++++++++++++++++

Derek’s thoughts whirred about as he walked along deck, the salty wind whipping his face. He eyed a number of large fiberglass canisters containing life rafts.

At least he knew how to get Maressa out of there. The problem would be framing her for her own escape and avoiding getting trouble for himself.

He grimaced as he looked out over the waters. The slate-grey clouds completely blocked the sky. He hated being out at sea, and, especially on days like this, he longed for a bit of sunlight. Though he couldn’t feel the motion of the ship, he would rather have his feet planted on solid ground. Pity stirred inside him as he thought of Claydol, Breloom and Golbat; as unsuited for the ocean as he was, they were even less compatible with it. Except for when he sent Golbat out to scout over the waves, the Pokemon remained inside all day, cut off from fresh air but too scared of the ocean to come out.

A pang of guilt hit him—he had yet to tell his Pokemon about his plan to free Maressa. Would they support it?

It doesn’t matter, he told himself. They wouldn’t have to agree with his decision; after all, they were still his closest friends. He knew they wouldn’t be too angry or label him a traitor for choosing to set Maressa free.

Sighing, Derek took mental note of the position of the canisters and made his way to his room. Once there, he let his Pokemon out of their balls.

“Listen,” he said, ignoring Breloom’s protests at being woken up from a nap. “I’ve got something to tell you.”

His Pokemon silently listened as Derek relayed his intentions—they didn’t make any objections or appear even the slightest bit surprised.

Breloom looked smug. Did Derek have any other plans to betray Team Magma?

“What? No, I’m not turning traitor—”

At least not permanently.

“Anyway, I need to think of a way to get her out of here without any of us getting caught. Do any of you have any ideas?”

The three Pokemon thought quietly for a moment, but it wasn’t long before Breloom spouted out his thoughts. Eventually, Derek had to tell him not to give anymore suggestions, as the most reasonable of the Fighting-type’s ideas involved gun powder, vegetable oil, and glitter.

“What about you two?” he asked Claydol and Golbat, ignoring Breloom as he sat sulkily in the corner.

“Dol…”

Claydol moaned as Derek felt the Psychic-type connect a telepathic link between the two of them. Over the mental connection, Derek saw Claydol’s visions, felt his every emotion and listened to his every idea. Claydol poured out his observations and ideas, trying to immerse his trainer in his thoughts and convince him to follow his plans. But Derek knew Claydol too well and had been working with him too long to fall so easily into the depths of his Pokemon’s mind. Eventually, as Claydol’s ideas proved to hardly be saner than Breloom’s, Derek had to pull away.

Claydol was very disappointed.

“Can you think of anything, Golbat?” he asked hopefully. Though Golbat wasn’t as strong as Breloom, and not as intelligent as Claydol, he had more common sense than the other two combined, and his ideas weren’t often as roundabout or convoluted as theirs.

The bat-like creature ruffled his wings and stretched them out thoughtfully. Through a series of high-pitched “eeks,” he suggested giving a diversion while Derek took Maressa away to escape.

“What sort of diversion?”

The Poison-type suggested that, while on watch some night, he could grab a Wingull, bring it inside, and chase it around the interior of the ship. That should distract the guards—at least for a little bit.

Derek considered this and his heart lightened. Wingull were everywhere on the open ocean; it wouldn’t take long for Golbat to chase a small one onto the ship. And besides, wild Pokemon always made their ways inside bases somehow—it wouldn’t be obvious that Golbat had chased it in on purpose.

“Do you really think you could do it?”

Golbat nodded.

“Thank you,” Derek said, and a heavy weight was lifted off of him as he stood up. He held out his arm and Golbat hopped happily onto it. “Since I don’t want anyone to see me rewarding you after you chase a wild Pokemon around the base, I’m going to treat you right now. What do you want for dinner? Calm down,” he told Breloom and Claydol as they moaned in disbelief. “I let you both choose last week; it’s Golbat’s turn anyway. I’ll go get started on the food.”

While he walked, Derek contemplated Golbat’s plan. It was good—better than anything Derek himself could come up with.

I just hope it works.

++++++++++++++++++++

Evening came, and Derek smiled at Maressa as he entered her room.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m okay,” she replied, and she really did seem okay—her smile was genuine, and there was a sort of hope shining in her eyes that, until recently, had been absent.

“Do you remember everything I told you—about the small operation out by Rusturf?”

She nodded.

“Okay, just please be careful with that information. If anyone finds that I told you that—“

“Don’t worry,” she cut him off. “It’s not as if I’m going to tell everyone that I escaped with the help of a Team Magma member, and that he gave me the information I have.”

“I know, just…”

He shrugged uncomfortably.

“I understand. Don’t worry; your secrets are safe with me, and I’ll do everything I can to make sure everything will be all right.”

He smiled. “The ship has stopped moving now, but there’s a current going south. It should carry you to Mossdeep City by morning.”

She nodded but didn’t seem too keen on getting in the ocean. Derek couldn’t blame her; he could hardly stand being in the sea, and her last experience in the ocean made him sympathize greatly with her.

“I’ve been thinking,” he wondered, “since you don’t really want to be part of Team Aqua, what are you going to do once you get out? What will you do once you get to Mossdeep?”

Maressa sighed. “I’ve been thinking about this, too,” she said at last. “At first I was thinking I would go straight to the police—”

“Don’t do that.”

She irritably glared at him.

“I’ve changed my mind since, but why do you think I shouldn’t do that? If I was to go, I would only give away information about Team Aqua. I don’t have anything to say about you guys other than what you’ve told me and the fact that you own a boat.”

“I’m not worried about you betraying us. But I know that Team Magma—and maybe Team Aqua, too—have members infiltrating Hoenn’s police force, giving them false leads and wrong information to keep them off our trail. If one of them got wind that you were there, you could end up as a prisoner again.”

Maressa started and stared back at Derek, her golden eyes wide. Anger burned within him. Just how much information did Team Aqua keep hidden from their low-ranking recruits?

“Well,” she said after a momentary silence, “I decided that I’ll return to Team Aqua anyway. Even if I did go to the police, I don’t know how much I’d be allowed to help outside of giving them info. My Pokemon are still with Team Aqua, and I’m not going to leave the team unless they’re with me.”

As she spoke, her fear faded and was replaced by calm determination. Derek smiled; he worried about the possibility of her defection from Team Aqua being found out, but he admired the dedication she had for her Pokemon.

“And what will you do afterwards?”

She shrugged. “Whatever I can to slow them down. I’ll have Golduck, Lanturn, Sharpedo and Seaking with me, so they’ll have ideas and we’ll figure out where to go from there.” She looked up at him, her face shining with gratitude. “Thank you for everything, Derek. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You can thank me after you’ve gotten off this ship.”

But he smiled warmly all the same.

He checked his watch. “It’ll be dark outside by now. We’ll hear Golbat and the Wingull once they fly in here. Claydol is in the hallway, keeping watch. Once the coast is clear, he’ll let me know. Golbat will chase the Wingull past here. You and I will head the other way and we’ll get you out of here.”

Maressa looked confused. “How does Claydol let you know?”

Derek tapped his head. “He makes a mental link between us, so if he wants to tell me something, he just has to connect our minds and let me know what he wants to.”

“Are you always connected that way?”

“As long as Claydol isn’t in his Pokeball, the link is always there, but not always open, you know? Like…” He scratched his head. “It’s hard to explain, but he can pretty much telepathically communicate with me whenever he wants to.”

Maressa nodded and the duo descended into silence. Derek glanced at her; the cool, determined air she held a moment ago was gone. Her eyes were downcast and she slouched slightly. He wondered how she was when with her Pokemon. He imagined she wasn’t always this concerned or distressed. Perhaps, when this fight was over, they could still be friends, and he and she and their Pokemon could all get together.

When this is all over…

But just when would it be over? And when it was, how would the world be—conformed to Team Magma’s ideals, or flooded in accordance with Team Aqua’s plan? Or would it be the same as it was now, and everyone had given up?

Definitely not the last one, he thought bitterly. He knew the boss too well; the few times he had seen Maxie, Derek noted a powerful, confident aura emanating from the leader. And Derek knew that Tabitha would stay by Maxie until the end—he wouldn’t stop at anything until Team Magma’s goal was achieved.

A pang of guilt hit him when he thought of Tabitha. His friend was sure to get into trouble for Maressa escaping under his watch, and everyone else in the unit was going to have a rough time as well.

He shook the thought from his head. They may get in trouble from those of higher rank, but it wouldn’t be as bad as what Maressa would go through if she stayed. He tore his mind from the subject and let his thoughts wander elsewhere until he heard screeching.

The sound continued, rising in volume as it grew closer. Soon, however, it was drowned out in the numerous voices filling the hallway.

“Get them out of here!”

“Whose Golbat is that?”

“Look out, there’s another one!”

Derek opened the door and stuck his head into the hallway just in time to see a streak of white closely followed by a blue blur. A few Poochyena bounded past, followed by their trainers. The Magma members were commanding their Poochyena to attack the two flyers, but Golbat and Wingull were far too fast for them and sped away. Shouting excitedly, Breloom bounded out of the room and ran after them.

One of them, a sandy-haired man named Nate, suddenly stopped. “Derek, isn’t that your Golbat?”

“Was it?” Derek tried to appear mildly concerned, silently praying for Nate to leave and follow the commotion deeper into the ship.

Nate didn’t have enough time to reply before a deep, furious squawking echoed through the halls. The two turned, and Derek’s heart sank as he saw a large Pelipper hurtling towards them, its wings so large that it could barely move about in the hallway. Derek ducked back into the medical room and Nate flattened himself against the wall as the avian flew past, screeching angrily.

“I think that’s the Wingull’s mom,” Nate said.

“Its mom?!

“Yeah! The Wingull that flew in here was pretty small, and I saw that Pelipper sticking pretty close to it, so the mom is probably still looking after it.”

Golbat!

Fear flooded Derek—Golbat could handle a scared Wingull, but an enraged mother Pelipper? Without a second thought, he sprinted down the hallway, Nate following slightly behind him.

It didn’t take long to get to the fighting Pokemon; their screeches, combined with the voices of angry Magma members, echoed throughout the halls. Derek felt something brush against his consciousness, but he ignored whatever Claydol was trying to tell him and overrode it with his own thoughts.

Claydol, get over here! Golbat might be in danger!

Wedging his way through a crowd of red hoodies, Derek got to where the Pokemon fought in the middle of a hallway. The door to the security room was wide open, and the guards had their own Pokemon out with their backs turned to the camera feed.

“Numel, use Take Down!”

“Watch out for its Water Gun!”

“Gloom, Sleep Powder!”

The Wingull zipped around, screeching in fear. The Pelipper, with its massive bulk, shrugged off all attacks that hit her. When the Gloom released a green powder into the air, the Flying-type flapped its powerful wings, pushing the dust away from her and into a crowd of Magma members and their Pokemon. The trainers and their companions fell to the ground, all fast asleep. The Pelipper turned her attention back to Golbat, who flew around and dodged all attacks aimed at him.

Derek bit his lip, at a loss of what to do. He didn’t want Golbat to use Haze or Supersonic in the confined space, but he couldn’t just let Golbat suffer a beatdown.

Suddenly, Claydol appeared, floating into the midst of the battle serenely. Derek breathed a sigh of relief at seeing his friend. The command barely formed in his mind before Claydol obeyed. The Pelipper and Wingull suddenly stopped moving, held in place by the Ground-type’s psychic power.

“Good work, Claydol!” Derek turned to the two guards, Lloyd and Stephen, standing in the doorway, who both appeared taken off-guard by Claydol’s sudden appearance. “What do you want him to do with them?”

Lloyd shrugged. “Just take them outside and set them loose again.”

“Yeah,” Stephen agreed, eyeing the Pokemon frozen in mid-air with distaste. “Thanks, by the way.”

“Sure thing. Come on, Claydol.”

He led his Pokemon down the hallway while the other Magma members tried to wake their sleeping teammates up. He had only been walking for a minute or so when another member came sprinting down the hallway, hollering at the top of his lungs.

“SHE’S ESCAPED! THE AQUA MEMBER ESCAPED!”

The man stopped right in front of Derek, panting heavily, his hood slipped off his dark brown hair. A lead weight sank to the bottom of Derek’s stomach.

“What?”

“The Aqua Member—went overboard—fell in water—escaped—” the team member panted out, pointing a shaking finger to the hallway behind him.

Maressa, no.

Derek sprinted down the hallway at top speed. Maybe she would be all right—maybe she found the way out on her own, and maybe she figured out how to open the life raft herself. If she hadn’t…

Derek flew out onto deck where the starry sky stretched out endlessly above the calm, black sea. No life raft canisters were in sight—she had gone to the wrong deck.

“Maressa, oh, Maressa, no…”

His shaking hands gripped the rail as he stared over the waters going by beneath them, devoid of any sign of life.

She’s gone. She’s gone and dead.

He barely noticed when Breloom bounded out onto the deck. Claydol followed and blasted away the Wingull and Pelipper with psychic energy. The doll floated next to Derek, moaning questioningly.

“She’s gone, Claydol. She’s gone and dead because of me. If I hadn’t told Golbat to chase that Wingull—if I hadn’t left her… She’s gone. She’s gone and she’ll die.” He couldn’t bring his voice to rise above a whisper, couldn’t bring himself to do anything but stand at the railing at stare at the starlit waters, hoping beyond hope that he might see a blonde head bobbing on the surface.

But there was nothing. There was only the sea, empty and oppressive, swallowing up everything while a twinkling sky winked innocently down at them.

He heard footsteps pounding through the halls behind him and was dimly aware of voices shouting over the ship. Claydol moaned once more, and Breloom urgently chirped, but he ignored them both. He stood, in silent dread and sorrow.

As he breathed, the air suddenly turned thick with spores. His consciousness slipped away, and he let go of the railing as he fell to the ground, wondering why Breloom chose to put him to sleep.

++++++++++++++++

When Derek had sprinted down the hallway after Golbat with the other Magma member trailing behind him, Maressa could only sit and stare in shock. Derek promised to stay with her, to guide her to deck and help her take off—not leave her alone. What was she to do now? But this might be her only chance to get away from Team Magma—she had to do something. Getting up, she made her way over to the door and looked both ways down the hall. It was completely empty.

Turning the opposite way Derek had run, she made her way down the hall, trying to go quickly without making much noise.

Her eyes darted around anxiously as she increased her speed. Jogging in the halls made her feel vulnerable, exposed, and at every turn she made, she expected to come face-to-face with a Magma member.

She stopped at an intersection, thinking hard. Derek had briefly gone over where they would go to get out—was it left? Or right? No, maybe it was straight—

She wheeled around at the sound of footsteps. Did she really hear footsteps? Or was she so anxious that her mind was playing tricks on her? Either way, she had to make a decision. She went straight, her fear hastening her on.

The smell of salt hit her as soon as she stepped outside. And, though the danger was far from over, a smile broke over her face. She stepped over to the railing, breathing in the salty air, filling her lungs with it, feeling so elated, so free. The ocean flowed calmly beneath the still ship, and as she leaned against the rail, closing her eyes, all anxiety melted away as tranquility washed over her.

Opening her eyes, she looked around the deck. Derek had said there would be life rafts but she couldn’t see any. The nervousness came back as she looked around. Had she gone to the wrong deck?

She looked back out at the dark waters, wondering if perhaps she could trust the current to carry her somewhere safely without a life raft. But as she stared into the black depths, memories of her last venture into the ocean returned, and a fear drove deeply into her heart.

She backed away from the rail, slightly shaking.

Get a hold of yourself. Now is your chance to leave. You don’t want to be stuck here.

Forcing herself to approach the rail again, she gripped the cold metal bars. Hoisting herself up, she put both feet on it and settled in a crouch, preparing herself to jump as she stared into the waters. She had never been afraid of the ocean before—but up until a few days ago, she had never come close to dying in it, either. None of her Pokemon were with her this time. Could she live in the ocean alone, even for a short period of time?

“You have to go,” she told herself. “Time is running out, and if you don’t go, Derek and Golbat will have done all of this for nothing.”

In spite of her words, she couldn’t do it. As she gazed at the waters, she could almost feel the weight of the air tank dragging her down, of her lungs bursting with pain, of the pressure caving in around her. Already, the water seemed to come up to her, and she could see herself sinking, drowning, dying…

Who am I kidding? she realized. She got off the rail and backed away, overcome with fear. Sure if I stay here, I’ll suffer, but if I go into the ocean without a raft or boat, I’ll die.

Inhaling deeply, she turned away, and realized just how badly she was shaking. She didn’t want to face whatever Team Magma had in store for her, but compared to death, it was preferable. She prepared to go back inside, wondering if she could get in without anyone catching her.

As soon as she turned around, her heart stopped in her chest. A red-hooded man stood in the doorway through which she had come, staring at her in shock.

“HEY!” he shouted as he lunged towards her.

Without thinking, Maressa turned around, climbed onto the rail, and launched herself off of the ship. As she hit the water, she realized what she had done, and panic engulfed her as the salt water swallowed her up. Primal fear devoured her as she felt the current carry her away from the ship.

Sticking her head above the surface, she took in great gulps of air, her heart racing in a panic. For a few moments, her arms and legs beat frantically, but then her habits overcame instinct and she treaded steadily. The current swiftly carried her. It was a calm night; there was little wind. The stars shown serenely out of the sky and illuminated the seascape with an ethereal light.

She turned her head and watched the Magma ship steadily shrink until it appeared as little more than a speck on the horizon.

Maressa floated on her back, staring up at the star-strewn sky. She hoped she wouldn’t attract attention from anything, but there was nothing to do about it now. All she could do was wait for the current to carry her to any nearby land and try to stay alive.

+++++++++++++++

Derek blearily opened his eyes and blinked in the bright light. He sat up, wincing as his head throbbed. Why was his head throbbing? As he rubbed the back of his head, he suddenly remembered the events of the previous night.

He looked around but could not see his Pokemon. He was lying in his bed and Nate sat on a stool in the doorway.

The blonde man nodded to Derek. “It’s about time you got up. You were out for a while. What happened? Did you faint?”

“No, I…” He rubbed his head, trying to remember. “It was my Breloom; he used spore on me, and I fell asleep.”

“Why did he do that?”

“Good question…”

“Probably to save you from Tabitha. He was furious when he found out that the Aqua member had gotten away.”

Was furious? Is he fine now?”

“No, he’s still really mad, but he’s cooled down some. I’m supposed to go tell him that you’ve woken up. He wants to talk to you.”

“Great,” Derek grumbled as Nate walked out.

He sat for a moment on his bed and thought about what happened. He wanted to know why Breloom knocked him out. He reached in his pant pockets, but they were empty. No Pokeballs were on his nightstand, either. Worry gnawed at him—had they taken his Pokemon away from him?

Derek gasped as he remembered Maressa and passed a hand over his face as he closed his eyes. He didn’t have time to dwell on it before his commander appeared in the doorway.

Derek glanced up as Tabitha slammed the door shut. His eyes burned lividly, and the glare he gave Derek sent chills down his spine.

“What happened?” he demanded.

As truthfully as he could, Derek recounted everything that happened from the moment he first heard Golbat screeching through the hallway, though he didn’t say that Golbat intentionally chased the Wingull inside.

“Once I heard there was a Pelipper, I got scared for Golbat and ran after him—”

“And you just left the door wide open while Maressa was fully conscious?”

“Yes, I did. I forgot about her; as soon as I heard Golbat was in trouble, I forgot about everything else.” He met Tabitha’s dark gaze. “I’m sorry.”

The commander glared down at him, disgusted, but eventually his dark look passed. Sighing, he turned away.

“What am I going to do with you, Derek? I can’t let this pass without punishing you, but we can’t really have you anywhere other than where you are now.”

“What will happen to me?” Derek asked curiously.

Tabitha shrugged. “I’m not sure… I’ll talk to Maxie about it. What you can do or where you can go will probably be more limited, but I can’t see much more happening than that. After all,” he turned back to Derek, and his gaze had softened considerably, “you were acting out of concern for your Pokemon, so that much is understandable, at least. Just pay more attention in the future.

“Also,” Tabitha said as he crossed his arms and leaned against the opposite wall, “what about Maressa? Do you think she’ll live in the ocean without her Pokemon?”

Closing his eyes, Derek shrugged and shook his head. “I don’t know... The nitrogen won’t be a problem since she’s not diving, but whether she could actually make it to land… There are just so many things that could go wrong.” As he said the words, the reality of them hit him again and his insides turned numb.

Tabitha nodded. He said nothing, his eyes glassy.

Standing up straight, he walked over to the door and made to leave. “I’ll talk to Maxie about what to do with you. Until then, just try to rest. You hit your head pretty hard when you passed out.”

“Tabitha!” Derek exclaimed suddenly as his commander was about to walk out. “Do you know where my Pokemon are?”

“Stephen’s holding onto them. You can have them back after I’ve talked to Maxie. They’ve all been returned to their Pokeballs, and none of them were hurt.” With that, he walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Derek sank back down into the bed, more worried than before.

You can have them back after I’ve talked to Maxie…

What did that mean? If their boss saw fit to punish him, then would he not see them again? Would Golbat, Claydol or Breloom be punished for what he did?

His heart sank, and he knew that he would not be able to sleep. Maressa escaped, but everything had taken a turn for the worse.
 
Last edited:
Top Bottom